Chapter 66

But Eric's plans to retreat for some serious contemplation come to nothing, for Georgiana is eagerly awaiting his arrival, Kitty by her side. Will Georgiana agree to enter a marriage of convenience? She is still so young, and independently wealthy, she can wait to meet a suitable gentleman who can love her.

'Would your brother mind very much if we hunt your attic for an old harpsichord? I know how to tune one, know how to play one, too. We can make a start on the Bach, it'll be great fun for you to learn, it's very different from playing the piano.'

That will certainly keep him from too much thinking.

'Sure, we used to play in the attic all the time when we were younger, in the holidays, when Fitzwilliam was home from school. But I guess anything stored out there will be really old, too old maybe to be of any value. Shouldn't we first check the rooms filled with clutter, stored after the attic was filled up? Fanny and Simon found a lot of useful stuff in there, but they don't care about instruments, they were looking for accessories to go with our new dresses.'

Without letting anyone know where they are going, Georgiana skips up the stairs, Kitty following. Eric is deep in thought again.

If Manners wasn't so convinced Georgiana loves Eric, he would doubt again. She really treats him as her brother, which is very pleasant at this moment, for it saves him embarrassment and spares his nerves. But of course Kitty's here, and it's as if Georgiana has decided to be as much of an adolescent girl as she can whenever she's in company with Kitty, which at this very moment is all for the best.

'What's up with you, Mr Fielding?'

Georgiana's coming to get him, her voice sounds exuberant, she's so happy to see him! Doesn't she see there is nothing but heartbreak in store for them?

She's really close now, Kitty waiting for them at the top of the stairs.

'You look so sad, Eric, I would have expected you to be excited about the concert tomorrow. I can't imagine Mr Manners having airs towards you either. Whatever can be the matter?'

Of course she knows they can't talk about it here, on the stairs to the top floor, Kitty waiting for them.

'I'll just have to cheer you up then, come on, let's go on a treasure hunt and get horribly dusty.'

Suddenly she realises something.

'Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't even give you the chance to change from your travelling clothes and freshen up a little.'

Her face is sad now, apparently she really values being well-mannered, but she truly cannot fault herself for this expedition. He sends her his sweetest smile, he can't help it, she's so incredibly cute looking like this.

'You cannot help it, Georgiana, it was my idea to go hunting for a harpsichord, remember?'

Oh, she loves him all right, his smile causes her to blush fiery red, and she actually takes his hand, looking as if she is going to kiss him again, but not a mere brush this time. But she controls herself and observes airily, 'You're right, of course, it was your idea. I always feel so guilty about forgetting some etiquette or other, I had governess after governess trying to teach me some manners. Mrs Annesley was the worst, she always wanted me to sit with the ladies and talk. I like her much better now she's no longer bossing me around.

Come!'

And she pulls him up the stairs by his hand, laughing again, her hand stronger than it looks, like his own, playing the piano all day has that effect.

'Do we start with the oldest stuff in the attic? Or do we start with the youngest stuff, that's mostly gathered in several rooms up here, you'll remember the one where we tuned the old piano. We can skip that room, of course.'

'Let's start with the attic,' Kitty begs, 'old stuff is great fun, maybe there will be toys from when your brother was just a boy.'

That is a weird thought, dignified Mr Darcy running around in shorts, clinging to his beautiful mother's dress-skirts.

'The attic is way older, Kitty, it will be our grandfather's toys there.'

The very thought obviously excites her, who knows what they'll find. Besides a harpsichord.

Eric is curious about the oldest stuff, too, and he offers his opinion.

'That doesn't mean it's impossible to find great instruments there, Miss Darcy. Piano-fortes improve with every new type, but harpsichords have been made in exactly the same way for decades at least, maybe even centuries. A very old one, if it's still sound, will be as good as a new one.

And even if we don't find an instrument, I'm getting kind of curious what your great-grandfather thought worth keeping.'

The prospects of a rich family's attic cheers him a lot, there may be real treasures to be found there, though they will be covered in a thick layer of dust.

And dusty it is, starting with the narrow winding stairs behind a very heavy door that Georgiana leads them towards. It's covered with dust and there are cobwebs all over, and the girls insist Eric must go first, because of spiders.

They are positively giggly together, but it's good for Georgiana to forget about propriety and genteel manners for a few moments, Kitty's exuberance is as good for Georgiana as the latter's accomplishments and propriety are useful to Kitty. Small wonder Mr Darcy loves Kitty's elder sister so much, she has the same spirit combined with natural intelligence and a lot more education.

Of course Eric makes the most of the situation, playing the hero for not being afraid of spiders, or ghosts, for this place does bring those to mind.

The girls follow, now a lot more quiet and rather impressed by the mysterious atmosphere, and soon they reach the top of the stairs and see the attic in all its ancient glory.

The ceiling is higher than expected, they're directly below the roof of course, the beams supporting it are visible and to Eric's relief, quite sturdy.

There is barely enough light coming from a few windows, they should have brought lamps, and Georgiana calls out, already on her way back to the stairs, 'I'm going to ring for Simon, have him fetch us some lamps. He'll love browsing with us, and if we do find a harpsichord he can help us carry it.'

And she's off, no longer afraid of spiders or cobwebs.

'Isn't this a picture out of a Gothic novel, Mr Fielding?' Kitty observes, 'I'm glad you're with us, I tend to scare myself with my own fantasies.

Georgiana missed you so much yesterday, she sat at the piano all day, playing that sonata you taught her. Don't tell her I said so, she'd be so mad!'

Before Eric has recovered from the realisation that even Kitty seems to have noticed something going on between them, she assumes a listening pose and observes, 'There she is, I can hear her on the stairs already.'

'Simon was very quick to react, of course he was curious who rang from the second floor, no-one lives there. He loved the idea of being involved in an attic-hunt, he's coming back instantly with enough lamps.

Let's start beneath the window.'

There is a lot of furniture, sofa's and easy chairs, even a stack of dining chairs. Most seats are covered with white sheets but the legs sticking out underneath give their style away. Of course they are very elaborate, curled and twisted. The seats will be crushed velvet, stuffed with horse-hair, like Mrs Grenfell's furniture. Though this seems a bit slimmer, it's probably much older still.

Four-poster beds, tables, buffets, enough priceless furniture to fill Mr Zumpe's entire house once over.

Directly under one widow they find a large box with Persian rugs, and matching pillows, also covered with a sheet to stop dust from entering, but in vain, this has been lying here for such a long time, the dust has gotten into everything.

Kitty sneezes, and from the stairs they hear a gay, 'Bless you, Miss Catherine!'

It's Simon already, he must really be eager for a bit of fun.

He carries a tray with several lamps, and he insists on placing them by himself.

'Mrs Annesley will kill me if one of you girls spills burning oil and sets the place ablaze. I'm here to guard the lamps, but I'm going to admire your spoils from a distance.'

With four lamps placed on safe, stable surfaces, the girls can look in boxes and under sheets, while Eric, as an adult, is allowed a lamp of his own to merely scan the furthest corners in search of a usable harpsichord. His hopes of finding one are rising, this is not rubble, but quality furniture, its only reason for having been discarded the quirks of ancient fashion. Some of this stuff is nearly back in fashion, the sleeker, more stylised pieces he can spy out here and there.

Turning a corner around a tall armoire, he nearly exclaims in fear as he sees a human shape loom up behind it. Holding the lamp high, he can see it's a mannequin, used to fit clothes, it's incredibly life-like, probably the reason it was discarded in the first place, who'd want to see that in their bedroom every night?

There is a toy horse the size of a real pony, high chairs with narrow seats, probably to allow small children to sit at the dining table, and dozens of saddles, normal ones and ladies' saddles, and an endless number of chests in different styles for the girls to rummage in.

Finally, Eric can see a promising shape, it looks like a piano, but smaller and narrower, it may very well be a harpsichord. If so, it's a really old one, for it is clear the attic was filled up from back to front, and this is near the end.

Clearing away a few boxes towards one side, and removing several very dusty curtains from the top, he spies a lovely little instrument, it seems priceless, lacquered wood with mother-of-pearl inlays.

It's a task to free it enough to get to the keyboard, but he manages, places the lamp on top of the instrument, and plays a scale.

Cries from the front signal Georgiana's imminent arrival, good, they can take it to the kind of path in the middle together, and look inside to see how bad the damage of years, decades, in storage is. It's not too cold up here, though it's right under the roof. Of course, heat rises up, and it isn't damp here either, so there is some hope the little instrument will still be usable.

As Kitty holds the lamp, Eric and Georgiana strain to lift the harpsichord carefully, to the path in the middle, where Simon can bring another lamp without losing sight of the other ones. He is taking his responsibility seriously, but of course a fire can start in a second, and it won't spare a rich man's house any more than a poor man's.

They check the wood carefully for cracks, hold a lamp to the interior to see whether the strings and the plucking mechanism are complete. No hammers in a harpsichord, Georgiana will love the sound, well, once it's tuned well and with the right music to bring out its qualities.

'Let's go for this one,' he offers, 'I think it's in as good a condition as we'll find any instrument in an attic. It wasn't broken when it was relegated here, poor thing. If we quench the lamps but one, can you help me lift it down the stairs, Simon?'

'Oh, please Mr Fielding, can we spend a little more time up here? It such fun, look at that large toy-horse, I want to see all of it.'

Kitty doesn't care three straws about pianos or harpsichords, she likes rugs and pillows and antique furniture, and frankly, Eric would gladly use this beautiful quality to furnish his own house, if he had one.

'We can ask Fitzwilliam to let us decorate one of the guest-rooms with this stuff, Kitty, it could be your room when you stay with us. We'd take those chairs..'

'Yes, and that bed over there, but with those curtains..'

Those girls will be very happy here for at least another hour, and Simon looks so very eager to join them in their search.

'Simon, will you allow a grown man to relieve you from your station for half an hour? I can watch those lamps, I promise, and you can join the girls hunting out ancient decorations.'

Simon really, really wants to. There is so much silk stored here, dyed in rich colours, and velvet embroidered with gold thread, and life-like multi-coloured hunting scenes. And Eric doesn't know a girl that wouldn't want such a lovely life-sized pony carved out of wood and painted in emeralds, mauves, purples and golds in her own room. Those colours certainly aren't mere yellows and blues and greens, they need those beautiful names to describe their richness.

'Yes, please, Eric. I so love scouring these memories of old times, the quality they used was so incredible. You're satisfied with your little piano? It's certainly beautiful and very cute. It sounded weird, though, are you sure it's all right?'

Smiling, Eric corrects Simon's assumption.

'It's supposed to sound like that, Simon, it's not a piano, it's a harpsichord. It's horribly out of tune, but it seems to be functioning well. And I'm very happy with it, Manners gave Miss Darcy a compilation of Bach-works, and they should be played on a harpsichord, not a piano. But let them have their fun first.'

Of course Manners' name causes Simon to listen attentively, and he comments, 'Seems like you and him are rather familiar after last night.'

Poor Simon, as a servant, and someone else's at that, he is not included in any of Manners' activities, which is rather normal since servants tend to have their own lives to lead, but in Simon's case it must sting, and make him very insecure.

'He asked me permission to use my first name in private, and leave off the honorific in public. And bid me to reciprocate. We did talk, Simon. And I saw a lot of things, you were totally right about Grenfell, did you suspect what they would be doing there?'

'Frederick told me. You mean to say he told you about us?'

Simon is almost fearful to hear Eric's reply.

'He did.'

Now Simon's in shock.

'He had his reasons, Simon, but they're his to tell you.'

On impulse, Eric adds, 'He's not toying with you, Simon, I remember what you said to me when you found me in dejection that time, but he told me he is desperately in love with you.

Desperate, Simon. Doesn't that more or less describe our own state of mind?'

'It does, Eric, for me at least. It's so hard to love someone so far above me. He's such a superior man, so much out of my league, I just cannot imagine he'd truly love me. Though I couldn't imagine him playing with anyone's feelings, either. I merely thought I was fooling myself, my admiration causing me to read signals in him that he wasn't actually sending.'

Simon has become a real friend to Eric in the short time they've known each other. Eric's strange status between gentry and staff makes it easier to connect, and apparently Simon feels the same.

'I'm glad you know, Eric. You're not offended?'

'Frankly, I haven't had the time to decide what to think. You'll find me even more naïve than you thought, when I tell you it didn't even occur to me that a man could love another man like that.

Frederick told me this morning, and other things that sent me reeling. I was planning to think them over while practising, but then Miss Darcy and Miss Catherine were waiting for me and I thought I'd find another way to not think about my own situation.'

Now it's Simon's turn to speak soothingly.

'You've given me hope, Eric, now let me give you hope, too. As you cannot tell me some things because they're Frederick's to tell, so some things aren't mine to talk about either. But your situation is less desperate than you think. Miss Darcy shows every sign of a serious attachment to you, and just as Frederick will find a way to be together, she will find a way to be with whom she wants. Don't lose heart, Eric.'

And with that cryptic remark, he joins the girls in their quest for quaint pillows and knick-knacks, while Eric guards the lamps and tries to get some of the dust off the little harpsichord with one of the large sheets lying about.

How can Simon compare Georgiana with Manners? The one has control over everything, the other none at all, not even over her own life.