A/N: My darlings, it's a Christmas smut :) If you want fluff, I'll be posting the last part of All I Want For Christmas tomorrow, on Christmas Eve. This one is definitely not T rated ;)

A/N#2: This fic is a companion piece to RagdollPrincess' chapter 7 in her one-shot collection, Thundering Moments of Tenderness Rage. You might want to have a look at it to understand where Kili got a shiner :) And Wynni will be posting her companion piece, with her OC Bri and Fili.

Also RagdollPrincess will be posting a follow-up chapter to her fic. Check it out when it pops up! :)

Thorin opened the cab door for Wren who gracefully minced out of the hair salon he was picking her up from. She was holding the trail of her long white coat with two fingers, delicately hopping over slushy puddles in her tiny bronze stilettos. He could see the sequin champagne dress shortly twinkle in the low cut of the coat, and his shoulders tensed. He liked the dress, but there was no way to put a bra under it. And he had just returned from a business trip after two weeks, and not having access to her body for so long had already made him restless. Her small breasts under one layer of fabric and the short skirt of that dress, down to the middle of her shapely thighs might become an issue. She jumped in his arms and hung on his neck.

"Missed me, Durinson?" She purred, and her cool little fingers snaked under the collar of his shirt. He caught her mouth. He assumed she'd forgive his lack of manners. Apparently she did, a slender leg went around his, and he deepened the kiss. The cabbie honked, and she laughed into his mouth.

He moved her away from him, still holding one strong hand, and she started climbing into the cab. Her lovely knees flashed in front of his eyes, and she closed the coat again. He slid near her on the seat and immediately pulled her into him.

"Where to?" The cabbie's tone was exasperated, and she gleefully gave him the address, while Thorin was already kissing her neck.

He couldn't help it and pushed his hand in the cut of the coat and the dress at the same time, and he felt her take a sharp breath in. One orange curl brushed his nose, and he nipped the radiant pale skin on the side of her throat.

"I don't like it when you are just out of a salon. From all their stuff I can't smell you," his whisper was raspy, and she turned and kissed him forcefully. And then pulled his hand out of her cleavage.

"Behave, Durinson, we will be thrown out of a cab. Again." There was an impish grin hiding in the corners of her red lips, and he growled.

"I'm willing to risk it," he grabbed her around her waist and jerked her towards him.

"The gratuity will be generous I promise," she merrily called to the cabbie who rolled his eyes and concentrated on the road. It was snowing, and he thankfully was engaged not to see how Thorin's hand migrated back into his wife's dress.

"Thorin..." Her tone was cautioning, "Do you want to just go home maybe? I would prefer Fili's party of course. Everyone will be there, and it's a tradition after all. Do you think you'll survive it?" He hummed noncommittally into the collarbone he was kissing. "And we are picking up Bri from her hotel now, so you need to get rid of this," she pointed her little index finger on his erection straining from his trousers. "Think of something dull and annoying." He straightened up and gave her a sarcastic look from a cocked brow. "How was the trip?" He leaned back on the seat and gave her a warm smile.

"Dull and annoying." She laughed and started fixing her dress. The curls had already started escaping the do, and he picked up one and twirled it between his fingers.

"I have missed you," his tone was serious, and she looked at his askew.

"And I you, but you are here now," she leaned in and quickly kissed him. And then again. And again. And then he stopped noticing anything except for the pair of familiar soft lips and a small hand that now repeated his maneuver from a few minutes before, sliding under his coat and jacket. And just before she jerked it back he remembered what he fingers would bump in there. Kissing her always made his noggin empty.

She moved away and lifted her brows questioningly. "Thorin..." She drew out. He sighed and pulled the velvet case out. "I thought we agreed no gifts this year. The trip in February is our gift to each other, remember?" He smiled to her and pecked her lips.

"I couldn't help it." He stretched his hand to her, and she pouted. And opened her clutch getting a small package out of it. It was wrapped in merry paper with snowmen, and he guffawed.

"Mine is cheap," her tone was dischuffed, and he laughed harder. "It doesn't break the rules. This," she pointed at the black velvet, "Definitely will!"

"Open it already," he hurried her, he loved her face when he'd guess right, and she sighed dramatically, and they exchanged the packages.

"Oh Thorin..." He loved that breathy tone, her lips wrapped around his name, her eyes shining, and she threw her arms around his neck. "I love it, I love it, I love it!"

"It's from that small shop..."

"On Jean-Médecin, yes," she was clutching the pendant in her hand, and he felt her squeeze his neck harder. The necklace was a simple silver chain and a small round bird for a pendant, they had walked by it in a shop window every day when they were in Nice, and the shop was always closed. She really liked it and kept on saying that they would have to pay twice as much for it home. Every time they would discuss that it was definitely a wren and then laugh that they sounded like a broken record. He wasn't going to tell her that, but the shop was closed this time again. He spend a week and an obscene amount of money to find someone to replicate it.

She moved away from him, and he saw her eyes were suspiciously shiny.

"I feel bad now," her tone was sincerely upset, and he cupped her face. "I got you a randy gift. And you are being so wonderful, and it's so... " She blinked frantically, trying to spare her mascara, and he laughed again.

"I am a man, Wren. Randy gift is the best gift. And you are always the thoughtful one, let me have this one time." She laughed shakily and handed the pendant to him. She turned around, and he clasped it at her gorgeous nape, not forgetting to press his lips to her neck. Salon products or not, she smelled and tasted divine. He nuzzled little curls on the elegant nape, and she twisted from under his ministrations.

"Open your inadequate gift, Durinson," she grumbled and twitched her nose. He adored the nose.

Under the snowmen paper he was surprised to find a book, a small leather bound book, exquisite buckram, elegant print of the title. Pearls and Rosebuds. He opened the first page, and another bout of guffaws erupted out of him. Treasures of the world of erotic poetry. And then he saw that there were bookmarks. Neat ribbons of red silk were placed between pages, and he opened a random one. Wren cherished books too much to underline anything but the poems were short and to the point. And graphic. Blimey, they were.

He felt very, very hot and slowly turned his head to Wren. Her pupils were giant, lips slightly open, and he toppled her on the seat, ignoring the cabbie's indignified "Seriously, dude?!" This time Thorin's hand slid up a slender thigh, she gasped, and he cupped her between her legs.

"I'm shagging you at that party." He whispered in her ear and saw her teeth sink in her bottom lip, her cheekbones burning. She didn't move away though, and he felt the silky lace under his fingers was moist. "You are the clever one here, find me a place." He pressed his thumb into her clitoris, and she moaned. She could never keep her voice down. "Or there will be witnesses." He pushed the dress aside with his nose and quickly kissed a puckered bright nipple. This moan was louder, and her eyes closed.

"God I love this family!" Bri's jolly voice made Wren jolt and thrash under him. Thorin groaned in frustration. His head was foggy, and he honestly didn't care, but apparently the cab was stationary and Bri, Wren's childhood Septic friend, had already opened the door and was giving them a chuffed studying look. Wren was insistently pushing him off her, trying to fix her dress at the same time. His hand was still on her knickers. He didn't want to move it, there was a little bow on them, over her red curls, he had a kink for bows. And she knew it. "For cryin' out loud, here they say Southerners ain't classy enough, and you two are makin' out like hogs in heat!" Wren moaned, this time from embarrassment, and Thorin dropped his head on his wife's chest. She better found a place for their alone time quickly. She smelled of her usual lilacs, and even the presence of the cabbie and the Southern totty was not going to stop him in about five minutes.

Wren was having the raddest evening. Everyone was there, the usual fifty or more people do, she waved to Balin who saluted her with his tumbler, couple of some obscure relatives were carrying in another crate of wine, and there was drama. Kili and Reese had obviously just shagged, after which Fili equally clearly had given Kili a shiner. Fili had trouble breathing, Bri had chosen dress well. She was generally gorgeous, all curves and fire and curls, and the poor sod had been bedraggled for three years, but somehow never made his move. There were feverish spots on his cheeks, and tonight might be the night. Sometimes Wren didn't understand the Durinsons mental processes. Although Thorin's was quite transparent at the moment. His eyes were hungry, she was chatting with Reese, and then he pushed the book into her hands locked behind her back.

"Page twenty five." He quickly whispered in her ear, and she shivered. God, the man had an illegal voice. She quickly excused herself and pretended to rush to the loo.

Let my tongue worship you, and my mouth be your throne. Bollocks. Wren squirmed in her wet knickers. Considering how fond he was of this exact position, she had to splash some cold water on her face. She quickly flipped through pages, tried to fix her hair, gave up on the idea and walked back in the room.

Thorin was finishing an anecdote, Bri's silver laughter was rolling, Bofur and Bifur were nodding approvingly, Fili was grinning like an idiot, and Reese chuckled into her wineglass. Wren looped her hand under his arm, he smiled to her from his height, god, she loved the height, and when he leaned in to her lips she whispered, "Page eleven." His pause was almost impossible to notice, but it was there.

He picked up the book from her hands in a smooth movement, the conversation continued, another group of guests joining them, and then he excused himself. Wren assumed that written in 1974 by Lucille Clifton Come with your rod/ that twists/ and is a serpent should do it for him. He did have a twist to his cock, a curve towards his left shoulder, and as intelligent as he was, he was still a man, the flattery of rod and serpent would hit the spot. He was absent for a while, probably trying to subdue the 'serpent.'

She was talking to Kili when his hand brushed at her arse, and then he noticed Kili's eye. They had been here for a while, but Wren guessed Thorin was a wee bit distracted. Kili mumbled something about falling, and Wren made big eyes at him. Seriously, he could have come up with something better.

And then Christmas miracle! Fili's hands were buried in Bri's luscious curls and Wren guessed that snogging expertise was running in the family. They gave the lovebirds enough time, but the snogfest was stretching and Thorin cleared his throat loudly. They joined their small group, Kili was already dragged away to some colleagues of Fili's by the window, Bri was smiling shyly, Fili looking like he had just won a Lotto Max draw, and Wren actually thought he had. Bri was bonny, and smashing, and full package!

The next round of drinks followed, and then Thorin leaned in and whispered, "Page fifty two." And Wren did not need the book. She knew exactly which one it was. She did remember which page it was on. may i feel said he by e. e. cumming.

(may i touch said he

how much said she

a lot said he)

why not said she

may i stay said he

(which way said she

like this said he

if you kiss said she

may i move said he

is it love said she)

if you're willing said he

And oh how willing Wren was! She grabbed his hand and started dragging him to a bathroom. Wren couldn't say he was resisting.

Thorin locked the door behind them, and before Wren could act, and she was in that feisty mood of hers when he would need to spray her with cold water to limit her bossiness, he grabbed her around waist and quickly turned her back to him. She immediately arched and pressed her perky little bum into his already hard cock. He picked her up and deposited her on the loo on her knees. No objections followed, just a soft purr. Thorin smirked. Wren never was shy to express her preferences, he was glad they were on the same page.

He picked up the skirt of her mind blowing dress and saw that the knickers were faring a lace bow on her arse as well. He growled, bent down and gave the left buttock a sensitive bite. She yelped, and he immediately pressed his chest over her back and covered her mouth with his hand.

"Darling," it was rather difficult to speak, "You have to try to be quiet." She shook his hand off her mouth. Curls bounced around her head.

"And you have to try to be quick. There are fifty something guests there who might want to pee. Or shag for that matter." He chuckled, she was so bossy. He hadn't had her for two weeks, he wouldn't need much. At least the first time around. He quickly shook off his jacket and threw it on the counter, she was squirming out of her knickers, and he stepped closer and splayed his hands on her arse. God, her arse…

He knew they had to be quick, but he just needed a bit of her delicious little body. Her hands were splayed on the wall, and he spread his legs wide, feet on the sides of the loo. His cock pressed just on the perfect height, and he caught a burning ear between his lips. His hands slipped under the straps of her dress, and then covered the small tits. She moaned, and he shushed her again. She tilted her head and gave him the Stare. Wren had the Stare. He nipped a delicious earlobe and quickly opened his trousers.

And still a bit more of ogling his wife wouldn't harm. He looked down, at the smooth radiant skin of the bum and brushed his palm to it, and then gave himself a moment to appreciate the view of the knickers around her knees. She wiggled her bum in the air and hissed at him. She was right, they had been here for five minutes already.

He aligned them, and then suddenly she pushed her hand back and wiggled her fingers in the air.

"Give me your tie."

"What?"

"I need something to bite into." His cock was literally out, and she was all beautifully presented like a maroon on a cake stand, and who cared it was Hermes?! He pulled it off and pushed it into her hand. Suddenly he imagined little teeth marks on the silk, and he grabbed her hips and thrust into her. The tie was working. Usually that would cause a loud banshee wail, all he heard this time was a muffled moan.

She was holding on to the wall with one hand, another one going back, around his neck. He pressed his hand near hers on the wall, wrapping the second one around her waist. He moved into her in forceful sharp movements, her mad orange curls were bobbing, and she was pressing her head back into him. He caught a view of his Dark Blue Silk Twill between her white teeth, and he growled and his fingers dug into the skin of her hip. He momentarily felt guilty, she'd have bruises, but judging by her reciprocated push back into him she didn't mind. She suddenly let go off his neck and pulled the tie out of her mouth. He leaned in and caught her mouth in an askew kiss she was clearly inviting him into. Her deft little tongue licked the corner of his mouth, and that did it. He groaned and came. He couldn't stop moving though, it felt so brill, and he pushed into her again and again, which worked just ace for his little ginger, and once he felt the first clenching in her fanny in the upcoming orgasm, he had no choice but to push his fingers to her lips. She sank her teeth in them, and he heard quiet moans. It was painful, but he didn't give a bloody fuck. He might have gone blind there for a moment, and god, he missed her!

She was breathing loudly through her nose and finally unclenched her jaw. He felt so dazed that it took him a few second to realise there was blood. He moved away from her, she swayed, but battered his hand when he tried to help. She was right, they'd been there before. It seemed they were done, then one touch, and back to square one. They quickly straightened up their clothes, and he pushed the tie in his jacket pocket.

"That is my favourite tie now," he wanted to joke lightly, but noticed his voice was shaky. She smiled to him, slightly drowsy. Classic Wren, conking out after a shag. He smiled to her warmly.

"Let's add some more merit into it at home. These two weeks were a torture, I started having ideas. I'll let you go first and tie me to the bedposts," her tone was nonchalant, she was fixing her hair in the mirror, and he picked up his jaw from the floor and kissed her ear.

"You are a perfect wife, you do know that?"

"I am aware," she sounded haughty, but them broke and giggled.

When they come out of the bathroom, they found a small group of guests enthusiastically engaged in a game of twister in the middle of the room. Thorin gave Wren a questioning look and she nodded full-heartedly agreeing. The two of them were not advised any body contact until they had at least couple more bouts. Even more so, they simultaneously decided some distance needed to be put between them. Thorin left for the kitchen to get some water and chat with some of his distant cousins, and Wren sat on the sofa to enjoy the glorious awkwardness in the room in comfort. Fili glaring at Kili when he'd be too close to Reese, Reese bending in the most seductive ways, Bri trying to avoid Fili, but ogling him while he was happy as a lark, especially when her green would be close to his blue.

Wren took a sip of eggnog and smiled like a cat that got the cream. She properly loved her family Christmas parties!