Chapter 86
The mustering was going well. Tess and Claire had ended up with a group of about forty-five sheep that were well ahead of the main group. Claire did a great job. She had participated in musters for a few years now and she could take on a full role at this point. Tess was really proud of her.
"So, Claire, I know we talked this morning, but I wanted to tell you that I actually spoke with Finn during breakfast and we made a date for tonight. I don't plan on seeing him back to back most of the time but, with everything that's going on, I had tonight free and we decided to go for it. I'll be home late again. I hope you don't mind that I haven't been around as much."
"Don't worry about it, Mom. Have your date. You don't have to babysit me, I'm not a little kid."
"I actually wanted to talk to you about one more thing. Aunt Jodi told me you were pretty upset yesterday. She told me you had some girl talk. I just wanted to make sure you were okay and see if you needed me or if there was anything I could do for you."
"I was upset, but Aunt Jodi's awesome. She helped me realize I was being silly and not valuing the right things. I liked Blake and I was sad because he ignored me the whole time I was around there yesterday. I was worried it was because I just wasn't pretty enough. Aunt Jodi showed me that, first of all, I am a beautiful person, worthy of love and kisses. Second, looks are not that important in a long term relationship. Third, that I have great traits to offer a boyfriend and if a guy doesn't want to know about them then that's okay, because there will be someone, eventually, that does want to get to know about those things, and will feel lucky to know them and, fourth, that kissing someone you don't really care about isn't nearly as good as kissing someone you really like. Oh, and she suggested being friends with Blake instead of trying to get him to like me like that. If I decide I don't like him as a friend then I probably wouldn't want to kiss him anyway, and, if I become friends with him, it could turn into more than friends," recounted Claire.
"Wow! You had quite a talk! Jodi's advice was thorough and very wise. It's funny, Claire. When I first met your Aunt Jodi, she was only about two and half years older than you are now. I got to see first hand some of the crazy things she did trying to attract boys she liked and because of boys in general. She was actually quite boy crazy in her time. It's funny because here she is, now, giving incredibly wise advice about love and relationships. Not just to you, but to me too. She helped me figure out how I felt about Finn. We are very lucky to have your Aunt Jodi around. I'm glad she helped you out. I'm sorry I wasn't there when you were upset," said Tess.
"She said she was boy crazy when she was my age and did some things she is now embarrassed about. You would have told me the same things. It's nice to have Aunt Jodi and Uncle Matt around. They're like my parents, but not quite. No offence, Mom, but they're cooler than you. They're there when I need them, but they're still not you. I'm glad I got to grow up with them around. Uncle Matt has really stepped in for me with Dad being so far away. I don't have a dad around, but I have Uncle Matt everyday. Thank you for bringing me to them," said Claire.
"I'm glad you're feeling better. If Blake doesn't see what a spectacular girl you are, then that's his loss. Just continue to be your awesome self and I have no doubt you will find someone who will want you for you because you are a beautiful young lady, and you're a badass sheep musterer."
Tess was interrupted by her phone ringing. It was Dave.
"Hey, Dave. What's up? Oh, that's awful. I'm sorry. Oh, we got started a little later since we didn't think it mattered when we finished. Thirty minutes? We can have a group of forty-five or so that could be there by then. Maybe you start there and we'll get the rest in as you're checking them? Let me tell Jodi the plan. Bye" Tess hung up with Dave.
"Okay, Claire. Well, Dave is available this afternoon after all. Yeah. Apparently the horse didn't make it. We are going to take our group of fast sheep straight to him and let him start checking them. We will then loop back and help move the slower gaggle ahead."
Tess told Jodi the new plan with Dave.
"I can get my group there in a few minutes. Then we're going to turn back and help move everyone along. Do you think Meg would be willing to go greet Dave and help with the vet checks? I'd ask Kate, but between the morning sickness, and her crazy reaction to Dave, I'm not sure that's the best plan," said Tess.
"Yeah. I'll call Mom."
Jodi hung up with Tess and dialed her mom. Meg picked up.
"Hey, Mom. Dave is actually almost here now. Tess has an advanced group that should be arriving to the paddock momentarily. Can you go greet Dave and help him with the vet checks?" Jodi asked.
"Yeah. I'll help out. I'll keep Katie close by so she doesn't get in the way of the checks. I'll be out in a few minutes. Bye, honey." Meg hung up the phone
"Okay guys. Farm duty calls. Dave is actually coming here today, after all, and Tess has a first mob of sheep ready to be checked. I need to go help him," said Meg.
"I'll go." offered Kate. "You've got cake in the oven and Katie to mind."
"Are you sure you're up to it? Being around sheep made you pretty sick before."
"I've kept food down for like two hours. I feel the best I've felt since I found out I was pregnant," countered Kate.
"Okay. Just holler if you need me."
Kate ran to the shearer's quarters and grabbed the handkerchief Dave had handed her the other day. She had washed it and wanted to return it. As she left the quarters, she took a deep breath and headed outside. She volunteered because she felt like she needed to have a private conversation with Dave and now was as good a time as any. She needed to clear the air. They needed to be okay around each other. At very least, she would need Dave's vet services when she got her teaching station going, but she would like to get to some level of friendship and comfortability with him.
She walked outside and saw about fifty sheep in the outer paddock. She saw Tess and Claire riding away. She looked over and saw Dave's car pulling down the drive.
You can do this Kate. Just be honest, she told herself.
She walked out to the drive so he could see her as he parked his car.
"Hi, Dave. I was too sick for the muster, but I reckon I'm up for helping you with the vet checks if you'll have me."
"Righto. Let's get to work," he responded.
"I volunteered because I felt like we owed each other a conversation too," Kate explained.
"Okay. We can talk as long as we work and talk. I'm very busy."
"No problem. I know what to do. We've done this together plenty of times."
"That was a long time ago, Kate," Dave replied.
"I know. I know that both of our lives are very different from what they were the last time we saw each other, but I feel I owe it to you to tell you that I'm really sorry I hurt you. I know I broke your heart and for that I am truly sorry," Kate apologized.
"It was a long time ago, Kate. I got over it."
"I have no doubt. You always were one of the strongest people I know. You made me stronger just for knowing you," Kate replied.
"What are you trying to get to Kate? Just say it," urged Dave.
"I was suffering from severe depression and was completely broken-hearted when you came to see me. I told you I was in love with someone else. I was. What I didn't tell you was that it was Riley. It took me a long time to get over you and Riley had been the one who helped me get through it. The time I spent after leaving Africa at Drovers was a horrible time in my life. Riley is the one who kept me together through it. We had just realized we were in love, but Riley died before we got to do anything about it. When you came to see me, it had been less than a year. I hadn't really let go at that time because they never found the body. I was holding out hope that he would be found alive somewhere with amnesia or something. My mind knew he was gone, but my heart wasn't willing to let go yet. I was a complete mess emotionally when you last saw me."
"Okay. So, what's your point?" replied Dave curtly.
"I want to be honest with you and tell you why I couldn't be with you then,"
"Kate. You're married and pregnant. I'm married with kids. None of that matters anymore."
"I'm sorry. I guess I just want you to know that turning you down hurt me too."
"Okay. Thanks for telling me."
"Dave, I want us to get to the point where you don't hate me. What is it going to take to get us there? I'm moving back here. I am going to be part of this community again. I would like us to be okay around each other," said Kate.
"I'm fine around you."
"It didn't feel that way yesterday and it sure doesn't feel that way now," replied Kate.
"Well. Treat me like you would any other veterinarian. I'll treat you like any other client," suggested Dave rudely.
"I've seen how you treat your clients. You aren't this cold to anyone else."
"If you're unhappy with the service you can find another vet. Unfortunately, Ingrid is flat out busy right now."
"You know damn well there isn't another vet practice in this district and, if there was, they wouldn't be nearly as good at the job as you are. You have a partnership for a reason. You and Ingrid can't cover everyone without each other. I know it's ridiculous to expect Ingrid to cover any call that involves me. It's also not fair to my future animals. I've seen the work you do and I know you are an exemplary vet," said Kate.
"Thanks. I will treat your animals with as much care as I give everyone else's."
"Dave, I'm not worried about the animals. I would never worry about an animal in your care," said Kate.
"Then why are we having this conversation?" said Dave.
"Because I care about you, Dave. I want us to be able to be friends or at least friendly. I don't want things to be like they were before, but I think we can do a lot better than this."
"I can't do that, Kate. That's asking too much," Dave asserted.
"Why? We're in the same social group. We will end up at the same parties and things. It's not unreasonable to want to be friendly with you. You don't treat Tess this way and she's your ex too. I reckon you wouldn't treat Regan this way either."
"Kate, we can be at the same parties. It's fine." Dave rolled his eyes at her.
"It's not fine. I know you hate me, and I guess I understand why, but it kills me that you hate me because I don't hate you," said Kate.
"I don't hate you, but I can't just pretend that we are best buddies."
"I know we can't be best mates or anything, nor do I want to be, but I'd like to be at the point where we can spend time near each other and not feel weird," said Kate.
"Kate, just drop this please. I can't just be friends with you again. It's not going to happen," Dave said.
"Why not?" Kate asked.
"Because you fucking ripped my heart out and put it through a weed wacker and, everytime I see you, it just reminds me of the months after that that I couldn't eat or sleep. It took me a long time to feel fully human again after you. I had to go back to Africa for another year just to get over you. So, if you say you care about me, just leave me alone and let me work," confessed Dave.
"Okay. Fine. Just know that I'm sorry. I'm sorry I did that to a person I care so much about. I'm most sorry to have ruined any chance of a friendship with you. I'm sorry I was honest with you. I didn't do any of it to hurt you. You're the one who showed up where I lived over a year after we broke up, all I did was be honest with you. I'll keep my distance from now on. I'll send Meg out to help instead." answered Kate.
Kate fought back tears as she walked away. Moving back here was going to be tougher than she thought.
Kate did as she said she would and sent Meg out to help instead and Dave finished the vet checks with Meg. Kate stayed inside with Katie and helped finish the lamingtons.