I'm really sorry it has taken me so long to get this chapter up. New born babies take up more time than you'd think!
Chapter Twelve: Together We'll Stand.
It was by chance or bad luck that they ran into each other on Friday morning, as Rachel had been doing her best to avoid Quinn since deliberately arriving at school a minute after the first bell rang. It wasn't that she didn't want to see her, but after much tossing and turning the night before she still hadn't decided what she was going to do about them.
Her heart said 'woo' but her head said:
'Do you honestly think that's a good idea? It's only going to give Quinn more influence over how your relationship progresses and you're already in so much deeper than she is. If you weren't she would have agreed to your very reasonable requests in the first place instead of turning them back on you. Which I'm sure is just another power play to keep you on your toes so that she can continue to hold all of the cards. And, anyway, you should be the woo-ee, not the woo-er! Not that you wouldn't be perfectly happy to open doors for her and take her on romantic dates – after all, that might be the only way you actually get a date that doesn't take place in the back of her car – but Quinn must get woo'ed all the time and this is your first relationship (for lack of a better word) and it's only fair that if she is genuinely serious about liking you then she should be prepared to offer you the full experience.'
And while her head was saying all of that, her heart was simply saying woo-woo-woo over and over again like a fudging owl was trapped inside her chest.
So yes, there had been a lot of tossing and turning the night before and she still didn't have a clear plan of how to proceed, hence the avoidance.
Until now.
Quinn paused in applying lip gloss in the mirrors just long enough to say, "Good morning."
Rachel took that as a sign that they were alone, which was unfortunate, but she didn't quite have the gall to just turn on her heel and leave the room. She tensed as the door softly clicked home behind her but did her best to look unaffected.
"Good morning, Quinn. How are you feeling?" She was in the bathroom after all.
"Disappointed I didn't find flowers in my locker this morning."
It was said so neutrally that Rachel couldn't be sure if she really was disappointed or just teasing her. She decided to play it safe. "Assuming you were expecting them from me . . . even if I'd had the time this morning to stop and buy flowers, which I did not, I don't know how to break into your locker the way you obviously do mine."
Quinn didn't speak until she'd put her gloss away in her bag and turned to lean against the sinks, smoothing her Cheerios skirt down with exaggerated care before looking up at her. "Well, just so you know, you're already losing points on creativity."
"I think I'm probably going to lose points across the board."
"Why?" Quinn folded her arms across her chest, annoyed.
Okay, so she hadn't planned out this conversation, she hadn't even wanted to have it, but Quinn's indignation stoked her own and she felt a rant coming on.
"Quinn, tell me exactly how to woo you and I'll gladly give it some consideration, but I'm not sure how I am supposed to demonstrate my romantic feelings for you when I am forbidden to look at you or speak to you or even approach you. I've told you how I feel, numerous times, and you still broke up with me because on one occasion I said something hurtful, in the heat of the moment that I regretted instantly, which brings me back to the fact that I still think you should be wooing me!"
"No, Rachel!" She startled at the raised voice and shot a look at the door, worrying it had carried into the halls. Quinn glanced that way too, but her eyes were filled with apology not fear as she pushed away from the sinks and softly repeated, "No. I've done that. If you want this to be something it's your turn. I can't keep being the only one who is putting themselves on the line here."
"You're not."
"It feels like it."
"It feels like I'm the only one who is too," Rachel said with a helpless little shrug.
"Seriously?" Quinn was angry again as she stalked closer. "Have you seen the crap I'm getting out there?"
"I know your popularity is taking a few hits but you haven't lost anything important. You still have Finn, you're still the Head Cheerleader, and the Glee Club still likes you more than me even though you were the one who tried to destroy us."
"It's not like that was my idea, I didn't have a choice!" Rachel nodded, because while she believed there was always a choice, Coach Sylvester was quite possibly the exception that proved the rule. "And what have you lost, Rachel? What have you given up? What sacrifices have you made to be with me?"
They were almost toe-to-toe now and she couldn't think of an answer.
"Exactly! You're still playing on the safe side of the street, Rachel, and that is not going to make us work. You need to join me out here or there's just no point!"
"I don't know how to do that!"
"Flowers would have been a good place to start."
"I can't just . . . Quinn, surely me telling you how I feel is enough! If it isn't, I don't know . . ."
"No!" Quinn didn't shout this time but her voice held enough steel to clamp Rachel's mouth. "I didn't make a half-assed attempt with you when you needed it. Which means I deserve the full grand gesture too!"
"Oh, you want a grand gesture? Are you sure? Do you want me to go out there right now and sing about how much I like you? Because I will if that's what you want. I'll serenade you in the halls, I'll recite poetry on the volley ball court, and I'll cheer for you on the bleachers at the game tonight. Are those gestures grand enough for you, Quinn?"
"You can't do any of that!"
"I know! So how do I make a subtle grand gesture?"
"I have no idea, but if you want me enough I'm sure you'll figure it out."
"If I want you enough?" Rachel repeated incredulously.
"Yes!"
"And where's my proof of how much you want me?"
Maybe she'd been asking for it sub-consciously, or not so sub-consciously, but it still surprised her when Quinn's mouth met hers. She was forced back a few feet by Quinn's lips, until her back was against the door. Her left wrist was pinned back beside her ear before she had really cottoned on to what was happening, but after a second and a half of careful consideration, Rachel decided she was okay with it. Quinn made a satisfied noise when Rachel kissed back and, as always, it was the sexiest thing she'd ever heard.
Quinn pulled back as the bell signalling third period trilled out in the halls, but only far enough to speak. Rachel felt the enunciation of each whispered word. "That's how much I want you." Her knees nearly gave out. "Ball's in your court now, Berry."
Collecting her bag from over by the sinks she left the bathroom before Rachel could get her head together enough to speak. Not that she could have said anything meaningful anyway, because while her heart screamed out 'WOO!' her head could only just about manage a, 'Whu . . .?'
Gym class.
Volley ball.
Quinn wasn't made a captain again, but she barely even cared at this point.
Santana and Brittany were the team captains today. Santana had first pick and didn't pick her, but she wasn't surprised. For reasons unbeknown to the rest of the student body (bar a couple) Santana had more reason to be scared of associating with her right now than anyone else and Quinn didn't hold it against her. She would do the same if their positions were reversed.
Thankfully Brittany didn't have the same hang-ups and cheerfully called out her name, even going so far as to give her a little one-armed hug when Quinn walked over to join her.
As Santana reluctantly picked Kassie for her last choice, Brittany leaned to whisper into her ear. "It'll make Santana mad but I'll totally pick Rachel next if you want me to."
Quinn smiled before she could stop herself, no doubt further cementing Brittany's beliefs about the two of them. "It's up to you, Britt. She can play pretty well, but it doesn't really make any difference to me."
Brittany gave her a look, it was the kind of look that implied she was being an idiot and Quinn didn't like it much, but it was Brittany so she just shrugged and looked away.
"Rachel!"
"Rachel?" Santana asked, giving Brittany a confused glare from the other side of the net.
"Me?" Rachel checked, pointing at herself like a dork.
Quinn rolled her eyes.
Brittany smiled, "Yeah, unless your name's not really Rachel. Wait," her eyes widened, "Should I have called you Manhands."
Santana and nearly everyone else started laughing and Rachel looked like she'd just realized she was the butt of a joke.
"No!" Quinn hissed just loud enough for Brittany to hear. "Don't ever call her that. Say sorry!"
Brittany shot a confused look at Quinn but didn't hesitate, "Sorry, Rachel, I shouldn't have called you that. It's not nice. Please will you be on my team?"
As Rachel warily made her way over, Quinn heard someone on the opposing side mutter, "Only Brittany would be stupid enough to actually want Stubbles on her team."
She bristled about it but kept her mouth shut as they took their positions.
She wasn't at all surprised though when, ten minutes into the game, Santana accidentally backhanded the ball into her team-mate's face.
The locker room after Gym had come to be a place she dreaded. Rachel had never been much a fan of it to start with, but it was even worse now that it meant ridicule for Quinn every single lesson.
Quinn was clearly intending to take the same dominant stance as before and was already in her towel when Kassie approached, two other girls flanked her with unearned authority. Rachel didn't know their names but she was pretty sure one of them wasn't even an ex-Cheerio, just an opportunist.
"Can I help you with something?" Quinn asked in a tone that was both polite and forbidding.
"Yeah, you can stay out here until we're done," Kassie said. "No one appreciated the stunt you pulled Wednesday, Fabray."
"It wasn't a stunt, it was a shower, although seeing as how terrible a cheerleader you are, Kassie, I'm not surprised you couldn't tell the difference."
Kassie leaned down into Quinn's personal space, she was actually taller than Brittany, although not as graceful from what Rachel had seen. "Listen here, Fabitch! You might still be head cheerleader, probably 'cause Sylvester's as big a dyke as you are, but your little girlfriend got most of us kicked off of the squad—" Rachel had no idea how no-one heard her gasp, maybe the tension was just too thick. "—which means we owe you nothing. You have no friends in here, Quinn."
"That's not true," Quinn's voice was quiet but firm.
"Okay, let's see." With a wide grin Kassie turned to the room. "Hands up who's friend's with Quinn."
The only person to put their hand up was Brittany. Rachel only kept her hands down by clenching them into fists. Holding one up might be a grand gesture but it wouldn't be subtle.
"That's what I thought," Kassie was smirking now. "So you'll stay out here, and when the rest of us normal girls have finished showering, you can take yours."
"Honestly Kassie, I don't know what you're so scared of because even if I was gay you would have nothing I want to look at. You have nothing anybody wants to look at. Now if you're done embracing your bigotry enough for one day, I'm going to take a shower."
"Are you deaf?" The acidic words caused no reaction but the hand that slammed into Quinn's chest, forcing the blonde to stumble back, most certainly did.
Quinn's instincts were to bring her hands up to protect her stomach rather than lash back and it was Santana who whirled around, the polo shirt she'd just taken off dangling forgotten in her clenched fist. Tina gasped while Brittany's innocent bright blue eyes turned dark and murderous and Mercedes muttered, "Oh no, she did not just do that!"
Despite all of that, Rachel surprised herself with her own reaction and didn't even remember covering the distance that put her between Quinn and Kassie just as the taller girl, pleased with herself, was stepping in to push Quinn again.
"Stop it right now!" she snapped, staring straight up at the intimidating bully.
She had to be nearly as tall as Finn! But that was all she had going to for her. She didn't have the biting wit or fiery temper of Santana or that cold, evil glint in her eye that Quinn managed so well. She was just a petty and jealous overgrown girl . . . who could pick Rachel up and shake her upside down until the contents of her pockets fell to the floor!
"Get out of the way, Fido. My problem isn't with you, it's with your lesbian lover!"
"No, this ends this instant. I'm fed up with your blatant homophobia and . . ."
"Rachel . . ."
"No, this isn't about you personally, Quinn, so you can save your embarrassment-fueled degrading nicknames for another time." She only realized after the fact that Quinn had actually called her by her given name, but she was on a roll now and didn't intend to stop until she'd said her piece. "This is for gay people everywhere! I'm not prepared to stand by and pretend this behavior doesn't sicken me. I see this kind of bred-in-the-bone vileness every day, Kassandra, and I know it doesn't come from a place of righteousness or morality like you would have people believe. It comes from fear and insecurity and small-mindedness. It's also against the law! You pushing Quinn just then makes you every bit as guilty of a hate crime as the intolerant delinquents who vandalize my dads' car at least once a month."
Well, she certainly had their attention. It was only as she was basking in it that her words had time to catch up to her. "Not that I'm implying Quinn is gay. As I said at the beginning, this is for homosexuals everywhere, none of which are necessarily in this locker room."
"Shut up! She told us she kissed you," said the nameless girl to Kassie's right.
When Quinn didn't immediately jump in to defend herself, Rachel did it. "Tried to kiss me—"okay that made her look better than Quinn so she hurried on. "—and besides, you're all very naïve if you think one experience with a member of the same sex is enough to conclude your sexual orientation for life, or even the next day for that matter, especially under circumstances as convoluted as ours was."
"Whatever!" Kassie threw a hand up in her face, her palm only narrowly missing contact with Rachel's nose. She heard Quinn hiss through her teeth as she stepped up behind her protectively. "We still don't want that dyke seeing us naked. Right?"
A murmur of agreement went around the room, although it was more half-hearted than it had been before Rachel's speech.
"Fine." All of the fight seemed to have gone out of Quinn and she sank down onto the bench beside her bag. She pulled out the paperback they were reading for American Lit. and, with her eyes trained on it, added, "I'll wait until you're all done."
There was a tense moment of silence as everyone looked around at each other, even Kassie seemed unsure about her victory.
Brittany broke it by plopping down beside Quinn. "I'll wait too. I don't want to shower with homosexuals."
There was an even tenser moment of silence until Mercedes said, "You mean homophobes, right?"
"Oh yeah, that's the bad one, right? That's totally what I meant."
Quinn gave the girl a grateful smile as she opened her book. "You don't have to Britt."
"I know. I want to."
And then it happened and it sent a surge of warmth through Rachel because here was her proof that she really was a part of something special, they all were.
Mercedes sat down with a shrug. "Yeah. Me too."
Tina followed her, "I-I-I feel more c-comfortable showering w-with Quinn than m-most p-p-people."
Rachel silently sank down on the bench opposite them, knowing that in this situation speaking her thoughts wouldn't be welcome.
Santana rolled her eyes, muttering, "Whatever," as disinterestedly as possible as she sat down on the other side of Brittany, like she hadn't just been about to punch Kassie into next week.
There was a second where everyone just stared at the tableau of uncomfortable girls, and Brittany, but then the room was a flurry of activity again as they went back to stripping down and the conversation came back. And if some of it included comments directed at the six of them, they all studiously ignored it.
When everyone bar a few stragglers had disappeared into the showers, Santana said, "You realize they think we're all gay for each other now, right? They probably think we're waiting to have some kind of lesbian Glee orgy."
Rachel was about to refute the ridiculous claim but Quinn started laughing and so she just stared at her in surprise instead.
"Hey, Girl, you can look all you want, but I'm not down for an orgy, with girls or guys," Mercedes' face was so straight that Quinn started laughing harder, making Tina chuckle too.
"I'm down for that," Brittany nodded, her face as straight as Mercedes', making it hard for Rachel to know if she was joking or not. "Girls gone wild: Glee-style."
Quinn's book slipped from her lap as she brought both hands up to stifle a snort in her sudden giggle-fest.
"Quinn, are you okay?"
"Yes . . ." Quinn took a deep breath, gaining some control over her laughter. "I'm fine, Rachel. Just . . . I don't know, I just think I really love you guys right now."
The five of them shared a look over the top of her head.
"Is she having some kind of psychotic break?" Tina whispered.
Santana smirked, "Either that or she's been drinking the Homecoming punch again."
The other two nodded seriously until Rachel rolled her eyes and pointed out the obvious, "It's her hormones. The pregnant body produces high levels of oestrogen to combat the stress and discomfort of growing a baby. I imagine the strain and anxiety Quinn has undergone in the last week has built up quite a supply of it and this its release."
"Anyway," Quinn sniffed and wiped a hand over her damp cheeks as she picked her book back up from the floor. "I meant what I said. I'm not a lesbian, but I do appreciate what you all just did for me."
"But if you're n-not . . ." Tina dropped her eyes when Quinn turned to her, and then glanced up at Rachel before dropping them again. "It's okay. It's none of my b-business."
"I . . . It . . ." Quinn began twice but couldn't seem to get further than that.
"What happened last week was an anomaly," Rachel said for her. "I was being unnecessarily stubborn and perhaps a little cruel about withholding something that Quinn required."
"What?" Mercedes bluntly asked.
"That's personal," she said calmly, "but I assure you it was nothing sexual in nature. Anyway, Quinn was under the assumption that I had a crush on her – something that is entirely not true, but I can understand why she thought so considering the amount of attention I have paid to her well-being recently – and acted on that hypothesis to entice my co-operation. It backfired, naturally, and has left us both extremely embarrassed by the whole encounter."
When everyone turned to Quinn, she nodded, "Extremely embarrassed. No offense, Rachel, but I am so glad I read that situation wrong and you stopped me."
"No offense taken, Quinn, and in turn I am glad that you took no for an answer." She couldn't help herself. "Even if it did take me saying it several times."
Quinn glared at her but there was humor in her eyes. "Don't knock it, Berry. We all know me coming on to you is going to be the highlight of your high school experience, even if it was fake."
Rachel grinned, "Well, if that turns out to be true, thank goodness there is life after high school."
After the confrontations in the locker room the shower itself was completely uneventful. Not that Quinn had ever entertained the idea of an orgy the way Brittany had.
They'd waited until they were the only six left before heading through to the showers together and then, by unspoken agreement, they all very much kept their eyes to themselves. Well, all except Brittany who just honestly didn't seem to care as she danced about, going from shower-head to shower-head as she sang into her bar of soap and Quinn almost had another giggle-fit when she slapped Tina on the ass at the end of the song, shocking the girl so much she jumped against the wall tiles like a naked starfish.
She felt a little guilty for it, because she'd been the one to bring up the conversation about Sectionals and what new songs they could put into the ring. She'd just wanted a way to keep things comfortable between them all, and discussing the one thing they all had in common seemed the way to go, and a distraction from the fact that for some unGodly reason, Rachel had chosen the shower head right next to hers!
She was on permanent blush and so being able to laugh at Brittany's rendition of a song from The Little Mermaid was a good thing. It was also keeping Santana amused, which was an even better thing, because Quinn was expecting her to start bitching her out about being put in this situation any second. But her snark was mild and mostly directed at Rachel's song choices and when she nearly slipped over when she was laughing at Tina, Quinn smiled, knowing they hadn't been this relaxed with each other in a while.
It left instantly when Brittany appeared at her side and said, "Why can't we see the baby yet, Quinn?"
"Uh, 'cause it's not born yet?" Mercedes' sarcasm was tempered by her chuckles, but at the other end of the room she couldn't see the way Brittany was staring right at Quinn's naked stomach.
"Uh, Brittany," she said, hunching slightly over to cover herself. She couldn't turn away because that would put her facing Rachel. "Can we have this conversation later? When we're wearing clothes maybe?"
"What's wrong? I thought only lesbians didn't want to look in the shower?"
Seriously? Well, she had her there, and Santana's chuckle from behind cemented it. "It's not that, obviously, I just . . . um."
"I expect Quinn, like many pregnant women I'm sure, feels a little self-conscious of the physical changes her body is going through, Brittany," Rachel said, so matter-of-factly she could have been reciting from her fake Health Science project. "It's unnecessary because she's hardly showing at all yet, as you pointed out, but you should be able to see the baby bump within the next few weeks."
Great! Now Brittany was going to keep checking!
"How do you know she isn't showing yet, Berry?" Santana asked slyly.
"Because I've been sneaking peaks the entire time we've been in the shower."
"What?" Quinn spun to her and the combination of her indignation and Rachel's carefully straight face and laughing eyes was enough to make Santana almost fall over again. "You wish you had the guts to look," she snapped.
"Oh, I have the guts, Quinn, just not the inclination."
Yeah, sure.
Santana and Brittany declared themselves done and left the shower unit with Rachel reminding them that Mr. Schuester wanted them all to meet in the Choir room at lunch to discuss the events of yesterday. Quinn still had to wash the conditioner out of her hair and so she was pleased that Mercedes and Tina liked to take ridiculously long showers. It saved her from being alone with Rachel.
The relief was short-lived.
"So when exactly are you due, Quinn?" Mercedes asked.
"The middle of May."
"Are you n-n-nervous?"
Quinn shrugged, "The idea of possibly pushing something the size of a Thanksgiving Turkey out of my vagina is a little unsettling."
"It won't be that big, will it?" Tina sounded horrified on her behalf.
She shrugged again, "I was a ten pound baby. I pretty much destroyed my mother down there."
It was a popular anecdote at family gatherings; how she'd been fat even before she was born.
"Wow, and Finn is huge so . . ."
It was Rachel who cut Tina off. "I don't think it's necessary to point out things that may give Quinn cause to worry even further."
"Yeah, sorry Q-Quinn."
"It's alright." It wouldn't be, if she hadn't seen baby pictures of Puck one time. He'd been tiny; right up until he hit fourteen according to Santana. "But can we not talk about it anymore. I don't mind you guys knowing, but I'm still trying to keep it to myself for as long as I can."
"W-why?"
"Why? Uh, because I'm getting enough ridicule in school right now as it is. And I don't particularly want my parents finding out, ever, and the more people that know the more chance there is of them hearing about it. So just keep your mouths shut, okay?"
She might like them more now than she had an hour ago, because she appreciated what they had done for her, but that didn't make them suddenly friends. And it didn't give her reason to trust them with her personal life either; she didn't even trust Santana with that. The only person she did was Rachel, who she could see was getting ready to leave.
It was suddenly important that she left first, because following her out might send the wrong message. She was done anyway, so she hit the button to turn her shower off but didn't waste time putting her towel around her, she just held it in her hand as she left.
Brittany and Santana were just heading out the door and called back that they'd see her in a little while. Quinn took advantage of the empty room to dry herself vigorously and was already in her underwear when Rachel made her towel-wrapped entrance.
"That wasn't supposed to be a grand gesture, by the way," Rachel said quietly, trusting Quinn would know what she meant.
"Good, because while I liked it, your speech didn't do me any favours."
"I know." They were quiet as Rachel dried herself off and Quinn pulled on a fresh Cheerios skirt. "I didn't mean to overreact but when she pushed you . . . Actually I really wish in hindsight that, despite my pacifist nature, I'd stayed back and allowed Santana to hit her."
"I'm glad you didn't. Santana's fierce and Kassie's uncoordinated but given the right conditions she could turn S into a pretzel. And you standing up for me meant more anyway," she added with a shy smile.
Rachel smiled too, and then after a moment said, "Uh, could you help me? I'm not used to the clasps yet."
"What?" Quinn stared, confused, as Rachel turned her back to her. And then, "Oh, uh, yeah sure. Finally ditched the training bras then, huh?"
"Yes."
Quinn took the two sides and pulled them together, clasping the perfectly fitting bra easily while keeping her eyes up somewhere level with the light fixtures. "If you can't . . . uh, who helped you dress this morning?"
"My father's aren't in the slightest bit embarrassed about this kind of thing," Rachel said with confidence and Quinn ducked her head, feeling a little childish for her assumptions, after all, they were gay so it was a no bigger deal than when her Mom had taught her how to wear a bra . . . "I, on the other hand, was very embarrassed!"
"Oh, thank God!" she breathed out subconsciously.
Rachel turned around. "Excuse me?"
She colored up, but it was just Rachel so she explained anyway. "I was too, when my Mom . . . it's silly." She was quiet for a moment before adding. "I had to start wearing bras when I was nine and no one else my age was so . . ." she shrugged.
It was so obvious she couldn't miss the way Rachel's eyes dipped to her chest before darting back up again uncomfortably.
Quinn averted her eyes, "I lost a lot of weight on Coach Sylvester's crazy diet."
She might have lost a lot more before that, but it wasn't a lie.
"I think your breasts are wonderful, Quinn," Rachel said so earnestly she couldn't help but grin. "No, I mean it. They're perfect. The way they feel in my hands . . ."
"Shush!" They were on the other side of the room but sound carried in here and Mercedes and Tina were just emerging from the steam filled showers. "Yours too," she whispered with a wink, "but shhh."
The Glee meeting was supposed to be a conciliatory affair, Mr Schue's idea to re-bond them because it hadn't occurred to him that they might have already done it themselves. Quinn hadn't expected Coach Sylvester to be there, and neither had Santana and Brittany judging by their expressions, but there she was, taking a seat.
She didn't crack a smile when Mr. Schuester admitted he was wrong about not taking the group's diversity into account, and really that should have been a warning sign, but honestly Quinn was too busy realizing that if she turned her head just so, she could still face the front of class and see Rachel's knees beyond Finn's at the same time.
And so she was only just about concentrating when Mr. Schue said, "And Quinn is . . ."
She smiled automatically, expecting something like 'Christian', or 'Model student' or 'Awesome' to come out of his mouth.
"Pregnant," Coach Sylvester finished for him.
Lesbian would have been better, she thought, but it was through a haze that made even blinking difficult. She heard several gasps around her, felt Finn take her hand and squeeze it tight. Was he trying to comfort her, or was he freaking out too?
"Sorry, Q, it'll be all over the blogosphere this afternoon and then everyone will know . . . including me."
She should apologize, she'd let her down. Coach had believed in her, given her the highest power and she'd let her down!
The words wouldn't come though, no words would. She could feel Finn's hand holding hers and every eye on her and a hand cupped her shoulder from behind, she thought it might be Matt but she didn't turn to see. Coach Sylvester spoke again but the words were mangled, like they were coming from under water, and then she was gone.
Quinn just sat there.
The other kids left slowly, one by one, all offering platitudes she didn't really hear. Everyone was going to know . . . everyone was going to know! Her brain rushed through plots that could save her, or at least delay the inevitable, but it was useless if Sue already knew.
Soon she was left in the choir room with Finn, who still hadn't let go of her hand and she was gripping his just as hard, and Rachel and Puck.
"It'll be okay," Rachel said, when no one else seemed ready to speak.
"Yeah, and it's not like you're the first girl to get knocked up here," Puck added. "The school probably has its own maternity club!"
"I'm gonna get creamed," Finn muttered to himself.
And while it was insensitive and the other two glared at him, Quinn totally respected it, because Finn was the only one on her wavelength right now. They were going to get creamed, and everyone else could sugar-coat is much as they liked, it was still going to happen.
"I need to go." She kept hold of Finn's hand as she stood and made for the door, and he followed willingly.
"Quinn?"
"Not now, Stubbles."
Quinn left the room, knowing she shouldn't have called Rachel that, especially right now, but extenuating circumstances, right? Rachel would understand. Right now she didn't even care, because her eyes were welling up and she couldn't control the need to bawl her eyes out for much longer.
She wasn't even exaggerating, because a few minutes later she was tucked against Finn's chest, crying her stupid heart out over everything, not even caring that they were in the middle of the hall.
Rachel watched Quinn cry from across the corridor. Finn was holding her against him, rubbing her back and muttering soothing words about how it was all going to be okay and she felt a spark of jealousy that she wasn't in his place but it faded, her heart breaking even more when Finn helplessly met her eyes.
He looked close to tears himself, a little boy lost, having to bear his owns fears as well as Quinn's and who was going to hold him and murmur it was all going to be okay?
Rachel would, later, if she could, but first she had to find Jacob Ben Israel and shout at him for breaking his end of their deal and then tell him exactly how he was going to make this up to her, because she might not be able to hold Quinn in her arms and make it better, but she could do something to ease her burden.
His explanation, as meekly delivered as it was, just made her even angrier. The thought of him keeping her underwear in his locker all this time was, frankly, even more repulsive than the act of demanding them in the first place.
"I'm sorry, Rachel." Head down, he turned to walk away.
"I haven't finished!" He turned back to his locker, head still hanging in shame. "It's not me you should be apologizing to, but it is me you made a deal with, a deal you have drastically failed to keep, which, I believe, means you owe me. Would you agree?"
He turned to face her now, like a slippered-puppy eager to make amends – if puppies could ever be as contemptible as Jacob. "Anything, Rachel!"
"Good. I need you to put something on your blog. A follow up on your Quinn story."
"But everybody knows I only do one entry a day. People don't like having their feeds clogged up and my followers appreciate my consistent consideration to their needs."
"You've made exceptions in the past."
"Only for breaking news on the hottest topics."
"Well, you already know Quinn's pregnancy is going to be the hottest topic your blog has ever seen and this can definitely be considered breaking news on the subject. Also, I'm not giving you a choice."
"Okay," he relented, excited again.
Tucked away in his 'office', which was a corner of the room at the back of the school library that had previously been the press room of the discontinued McKinley High 'Muckraker' she told him word for word what she wanted him to write.
"But if I do that everyone is going to think you're a stone cold bitch, Rachel, instead of the selfless goddess you really are?" he pitifully pointed out.
"I don't care."
"Is it true?"
There was enough truth in it that she had no problem lying with conviction. "Yes, it is."
Now he looked like a kicked puppy, but she didn't care about that either. Much less so in fact. "Make sure it happens this afternoon, okay? Or there will be consequences I expect you will find quite unpleasant."
She left him standing there before he could ask what they would be, because she didn't know yet, but if he didn't do as he was told she was vaguely thinking about enlisting Noah Puckerman's help.
She'd had another idea while trying to find Jacob. Talking to Mr Schuester about it made her ten minutes late for fifth period, but he had agreed at once and even wrote her a note to cover her tardiness.
So a few minutes into sixth period she arrived in the auditorium to find Noah, Mercedes, Artie, Finn and Mike already there.
"I found the music for the song you talked about, Rachel," Mr. Schuester said, handing her a copy as she walked up the steps to the stage.
Finn was already running through his lines, Mercedes was helping him out by taking her part for now, but he stopped long enough to say, "This was an awesome idea, Rach. Thanks."
"Hey, I'm just grateful you got me out of sixth period Math," Mercedes said, grinning, "But the song is a good choice too."
She nodded, smiling at both of them, before turning to watch as Mike demonstrated to Puckerman and Artie the choreography he was coming up with on the fly.
Brittany and Santana arrived next.
"Hear we got you to thank for the free period, Midget."
"It's not free, Santana, you'll be paying for it in sweat. We have less than an hour to make this spectacular and there will be no slacking off."
"Whatev's. So where's everyone else?"
"Kurt has gone on a mission to thrift stores to procure us all costumes and Tina and Matt are both in U.S. Geography with Quinn. They're aware of what we're doing but obviously they couldn't join us without making her suspicious."
Brittany had already gone to join Mike, easily picking up and adding to his dance routine and now Santana, having already exceeded her limit of civil conversation for one day, went to help.
Rachel walked over to where Mr. Schuester was talking to Brad about the musical arrangement. "Thank you for letting us do this. I know getting us all out of class may have repercussions for you but it really means a lot to all of us to be able to do this for Quinn."
"Hey, if Coach Sylvester can do it for the Cheerios three times a day, I can do it for us every now and then, right?" he smiled to show she shouldn't worry about it, but then grew more serious as he stepped away from the piano to speak to her in private. "How is Quinn coping? Finn said she was pretty upset."
"I don't know. I haven't spoken to her about it personally." He gave her a look meant to draw her out but what was she supposed to add? "I'm telling the truth."
"Oh. I thought you two had made up already, what with you suggesting we do this."
She frowned, "Made up what?"
"You know . . . uh, you and Quinn," he said, uncomfortable with the emphasis he was putting on certain words.
She wasn't as confused as she wanted to be, but she honestly didn't know how he knew about them. He had implied that Quinn had told him everything about the falsified incident in the bathroom but Rachel had assumed he'd been misled into believing that. That in fact he'd been given a story similar to the one Quinn had told the spectators at last Friday's football game, about manipulation and misunderstandings.
Had that not been the case? Had Quinn actually told him about them?
She didn't know how to feel about that. On the one hand she wanted to beam with pride and drag Mr. Schuester to the back of the auditorium to gush about Quinn like they were friends and not teacher and the other hand, she felt uncomfortable at him, or anyone, knowing something so private between them, especially because it was over now and she felt a little stupid at being so heartbroken over it.
In the end, the simple fact that she didn't have time to think about it solved the dilemma.
"Quinn and I are in an off-stage position in our friendship right now, Mr. Schue, but that doesn't mean she doesn't still need our support. Now, if you'll excuse me, I really should go and practice with Finn before Mercedes thinks that my part is actually hers for the taking."
Kurt called from his car twenty minutes later, requesting help, and Noah and Mike went to see what was up. The three of them came back laden down with bags of clothing. It was a mismatched affair and some of the sizes were a little off but Kurt had done well in the short time and they'd all be wearing black and white at least.
Tina came rushing into the auditorium with ten minutes to go. "I g-got a bathroom p-pass," she said excitedly. "Matt's going to bring Q-Quinn with him when the b-bell goes."
"Okay people, that means we barely have any time left! Back into our starting positions now!" Rachel said, clapping her hands to hurry them along. "Tina, there are clothes waiting for you in the wings. Don't take too long, you need to learn the routine as quickly as possible!"
Impromptu Glee meeting, Matt had said.
Quinn had had enough of those to last her the rest of the month but he'd been insistent to the point of physically taking her hand and dragging her most of the way while she protested.
Rachel had been waiting just inside the double doors and Matt had given her a wide smile before heading to the stage, where Quinn could see everyone else waiting. Rachel gestured for her to move away from the green light of the exit sign to the almost-darkness of the penultimate tier of seats.
"Okay, here are your clothes," she handed over a bulging plastic bag. "And please don't be upset that Finn and I are singing another duet."
"What?"
"Don't worry about not having had time to practice," Rachel continued. "We've kept the steps very simple and I'm positive you'll know the song well enough to join in the chorus."
"What song?"
Rachel smiled, "You'll see. Come on, you need to get changed."
She changed behind the stage, hidden behind the curtains, into the white top and black pants. When she emerged, nervously, because what was going on? She noticed that Matt had changed his clothes too.
It was Finn who stepped forward to guide her into place next to Rachel and then Brad began plucking out the intro. She didn't know the song, not immediately, but when everyone started 'oh, oh, oh-ing' around her and Rachel turned to whisper, "Just follow my lead, sweetheart, okay?" she felt a surge of emotion blossom bright in her chest.
"You're not alone,
Together we'll stand.
I'll be by your side,
You know I'll take your hand."
Quinn returned Rachel's smile tremulously but then had to look up as Finn stepped up.
"And when it gets cold,
And it feels like the end
And there's no place to go,
You know I won't give in.
No I won't give in," he harmonized with Rachel.
The chorus began and she did know it, and by watching those around her she could follow the steps flawlessly despite the ache in her chest.
"Keep holding on,
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through,
Just stay strong,
Because you know we're here for you, we're here for you . . ."
There's nothing you can say,
Nothing you can do
There's no other way
When it comes to the truth,
So keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through . . .
She could tell Rachel was singing to Finn as much as to her, the way their eyes locked as they turned with each other made it impossible to deny, but it was okay and besides Rachel's eyes were joining with hers much more often.
Strangely it was turning with Artie that almost broke her. The honest to God compassion shining in the eyes of a boy she'd never given the time of day to before tugged at her heart and if that hadn't been bad enough the tender smile on Kurt's face when they danced together was nearly her undoing.
Somehow she kept it together, despite catching the eye of everyone she was taking her dance cues from. Puck gave her a wink – and not the salacious kind for once – Santana a friendly smirk, Brittany gently tugged her hair, whispering, "Love you, Q," as she danced behind her, and even Mike gave her a sympathetic smile as they passed each other.
And then . . .
"Here me when I say, when I say, I believe
Nothings gonna change, nothings gonna change destiny
Whatever's meant to be will work out perfectly
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah . . .
So keep holding on."
Rachel passed by her as she sang and despite Quinn's best efforts her natural desire won out and their eyes met powerfully, catching the breath in her chest. Rachel didn't let the eye-contact linger though as she continued down the stage but before Quinn had time to miss it they were face to face again and Rachel was singing just to her.
"Keep holding on . . ."
The next part of the choreography was clear, everyone around her was holding hands for the final chorus. She could feel Finn's hand sliding down from her elbow and out of the corner of her eye could see he was doing the same to Rachel, it was obviously planned that way.
At the last moment she rebelled, thrusting her hand to the side, dodging Finn's. She didn't even have to grope for what she wanted, Rachel met her halfway, clasping their hands together securely.
"Just keep holding on . . .
Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through."