Author's note: Making good use of winter break! Updates will not continue to be this frequent but I am going to try writing more in the new year.
It was easy for Jasper to remember his existence before Isabella Swan. Vampires had infallible memories, after all. Surviving had always been the goal. It continued to be the goal, even when he first met her, but now? Now, he was watching Bella try to eat a cookie without getting crumbs down her shirt and he wondered what it would be like to exist once she was gone.
Several meetings had passed since he'd first decided his new purpose. Several sessions of slowly realizing it wasn't hard to make Isabella Swan happy. She had been happy to explain that what they were doing was called "hanging out" and that meetings were typically for business. She'd been playfully stubborn when he offered her the extra thick coat he had tucked away, but eventually admitted she was grateful. She'd been proud when he'd expressed how impressed he'd been with her during the joint lecture. She'd been ecstatic when he told her he'd stolen one of Esme's fundraiser cookies for her.
Bella laughed, brushing crumbs off herself and the blanket beneath them, "I don't know what kind of science Esme studied to make this cookie but it is the best tasting, crumbliest, no-bake cookie I've ever had." Regret flashed through her eyes before she returned to her sugar fueled bliss.
Jasper could tell she missed the family more and more as they "hung out." His goal of reuniting her with the family by the end of December just might be realized. So, he tried his luck, "I can tell her that if you'd like?"
She swallowed glancing at him, "U-um," her heart raced, hope and dread filling her.
Still too soon, then.
Jasper was quick to move closer, laying a gentle hand on her warm knee. He spoke softly pushing calm towards her, "There's no pressure I-Bella." Jasper caught himself, she chastised him every time he called her Isabella. "I'm sure Esme would love to hear how good her cookies are but you can tell her yourself when you are ready."
Bella turned her head away, looking out towards downtown as she always did when she was deep in thought. Curiosity rose in her and Jasper could feel that she was itching to ask a question, but she held back, eventually settling into a weary calm.
This had not been Jasper's goal. Yet, it seemed just as easy to make Isabella Swan uncomfortable as it was to make her happy. He knew he had to think of something to turn this around. Their time spent together had slowly grown to last hours at a time, even as the weather grew colder. Soon, Bella would need more than just the thick jacket he made sure to bring on their outings.
Strategically, Jasper did not have many options. When limited to the outdoors with a human who seemed to grow colder by the second, he feared his only options were to call their day short or force her out from underneath the jacket she is currently using as a blanket, into the cold that she seems to despise.
Jasper's only other option seemed to be to make their way indoors. Not willing to take too many risks and unable to forget her birthday, Jasper had used an overabundance of caution and suggested they keep their hangouts outside. Truthfully, despite her uniquely compelling scent, the study room had not been uncomfortable. Having adjusted to being around her again, he knew he needed to continue to acclimate himself to her scent. They would not be able to avoid the indoors forever.
Jasper watched Isabella fidget with his jacket, the one she had begun using as a blanket, and knew she would discover a reason to leave if they sat any longer. He needed a way to recover their day. Weighing his options, he settled on something a bit riskier than sitting on a hill in the open air but something that should be no harder than his typical days on campus.
He spoke low, as to not startle her, "The Uris library, have you ever been inside?"
Isabella shivered while her heart started a familiar race. Jasper dove into her emotions, trying not to listen to her heartbeat too closely, to not think about the blood pumping through her veins.
Curiosity, she's always curious. Longing, she must have heard of it or seen the library before, it was a remarkable sight. Embarrassment, Jasper thought she must understand he can hear her heartbeat.
She took a moment to clear her throat before responding, "I have, it's magnificent."
Jasper was disappointed but he pressed on, sure she'd find enjoyment in the plan nevertheless. "This time of year the school hosts tours of different parts of campus. Not all of them are ghost tours," Jasper adds, seeing Bella's look. "There is a historical tour scheduled for the library at 3 o'clock." Jasper was curious, he'd never taken much interest in the history of the campus. It hadn't been important before, not when he'd been so distracted by other things. But now, he was curious about the library some had described as "fantastical" and he knew Bella would be too.
Bella chewed on her lip and wrapped her coat tighter around her, giving it some thought before hesitantly asking, "Are you sure you'll be alright inside?"
Putting his needs before her own, Jasper didn't know if he should be touched or if he should once again reevaluate her sense of self-preservation.
Isabella's phone dinged a shrill sound and worry flickered over her as she watched him wince. "Jasper?" She questioned him quietly.
A cautious smile in place, he replied, "It was just the phone, that sound is a bit grating on our ears but it's nothing to worry over." A little more serious he continued, "and you don't need to worry about being inside with me. I have been taking the easy way out with you for weeks. I've been in lecture halls and closed rooms with you. We will be fine." He didn't feel the need to mention the rate at which he had been feeding as she was already inspecting his near golden eyes.
She huffed a short sigh, exasperation seeping towards him, before ridding herself of her makeshift blanket. Once standing, she reassured him, "I trust you, I just didn't want to make you uncomfortable."
The tour of the library proved to be more entertaining than Jasper had anticipated. Not only did he get to learn about a university that was founded at the tail end of the Civil War and hosts a collection of official documents, but he got to observe Bella's fascination with the books and architecture that surrounded her.
He was damn near glowing with pride, his plan had worked out better than he hoped. He neatly tucked away every smile Bella had flashed him during the tour while one in particular stayed at the forefront of his mind.
The most well-known section of the Uris library, and the part everyone came to see, was the library of Cornell's first president, A.D. White. Standing next to the line of wooden study carrels, wedged between 3 stories of wrought-iron stacks, Isabella's excitement had been contagious.
"I never come here to work because I'm afraid I would get too distracted! It reminds me of Hogwarts or some library from a fairytale," she confessed. "There are supposed to be libraries like this but bigger all over Europe, in Prague, Dublin, Budapest. I'd love to see them."
He would love to take her. Jasper had not explored these areas himself but was sure Carlise would have plentiful information on the topic. He tucked the idea away for later when Isabella wasn't bogged down with midterms and classes.
The tour had moved on and when they reached the second story Bella had stared, fascinated, out over the railings at thousands of books housed by an intricate iron lattice. Leaving the tour for a moment, she'd walked out onto one of the several metal walkways that connected the towering stacks. When she turned to grin back at him, hair tumbling over her shoulder, she'd been as stunning as any heroine in a fairy tale would have been.
Nothing could ruin the success he had felt about this day, not even the one close call, if he could call it that, during the tour.
During the tour guide's speech on the various collections found in the library, Bella had stopped to warm herself in front of a vent and the warm air had carried a thick cloud of her scent in his direction. It had been so potent he needed to stop breathing. As soon as she'd noticed his darkening eyes and the stiff way he stood, shame had filled her. An apologetic "Jaz," broke from her lips and it was all he needed to bring himself back to focus. He chastised himself, knowing he was stronger than this.
Wanting to lighten the mood and refusing to dwell on the minor setback, he teased, "You call me Jaz now?"
He'd only made things harder on himself.
Her blush had been delectable and the air was once again thickened by her honey tinged scent. This time, there was no surprise and no flood of venom into his mouth. As long as he stayed vigilant, he knew being inside with her would not be an impossible task.
Later, they descended the steps to the first floor. Bella had been overjoyed with the tour and now, she asserted, it was time for her to find some real food. This was something he'd questioned her on, wasn't anything meant to be eaten "real food?" Turns out she had meant she wanted dinner, whereas the cookie she'd eaten earlier had been a snack.
Jasper was about to ask her if she would like some accompaniment to the dining hall but was surprised to hear the soft vrrrrrring interrupt him as Bella powered on her phone. He noticed she received several texts from Jacob this afternoon. The frequency of texts however was not what gave him pause. Isabella had turned off her phone when entering the library. She must have turned it to silent soon after his reaction to her ringtone. He recalled her fiddling with her phone as he'd folded the blanket they brought to sit on. He was disconcerted by the thought that he could have missed something like that. He was supposed to be on guard now more than ever. What else could he have missed?
He waited for her to finish her text but before he could ask his question Isabella spoke, "Sorry Jasper, Jake needs me to call him. It sounds kind of urgent." She gnawed her lip, looking up at him. Worry and remorse flooded her but Jasper found relief in the possibility that she wanted to continue their day as much as he.
Understanding, Jasper offered, "You should probably call Jacob then and check on him. Give your father a call too if you have time, you haven't spoken about him in a while."
Gratefulness moved in waves off Bella, "You're right," To herself, she mumbled, "I should probably let him know I'm flying to see Renee over Thanksgiving too…" Before turning back to him hesitating, uncertainty clouding her emotions. "Thank you, Jasper. Do you want to hang out again after class Monday? I'll be out early if my midterm goes well." There was a sliver of hope that gave him the impression she was afraid he would say no. He worried that the same insecurity she had felt with Edward would return if things continued to progress day by day. He needed to ensure she viewed him differently than his brother.
Jasper smirked. "I thought hanging out after class was a standing arrangement we had? What did you expect me to do? Go home and read?" He asked, chuckling. Bella had once commented that even though she wished she had more time in the day she would not know what she would do with her time if she never slept. Jasper had proceeded to tell her about the libraries of books he'd left around the country as the Cullens had moved over the years. Still, she'd had a point, more than one hobby was needed to keep a vampire occupied.
She smiled, finding it hard to chew at her lip with the playful way he spoke. "I'll see you Monday then."
9:26 PM
Isabella
Call me when you get the chance.