And because there just hasn't been enough murder, mayhem and guest stars in this story…
Hello Hydra
"Okay," Cobra Commander addressed his crew on the spaceship. "This time not only are we investigating this next base, we've brought a squad of highly trained Cobra Troopers! We'll be ready for anything!"
"Famous last words," Zartan sighed as he piloted the ship.
"I still say we should be analyzing the data from Vanguard's computer further," Destro remarked.
"You can keep saying it all you want," Cobra Commander snapped. "Destro we both know the majority of information on there is basically a large personnel file! More than half of which we already know about!"
"We could find more if you weren't so impatient," The Baroness spoke up.
"Baroness," Cobra Commander paused. "I agree that patience can be a virtue. It's the only thing that's kept you and the rest of the Idiot Brigade alive here at times! But right now, Cobra needs action! Clear decisive action!"
"And taking back another base," Tomax spoke up.
"Will strengthen Cobra," Xamot added.
"Don't bother kissing my scaly blue behind!" Cobra Commander snapped. "This is partially your fault as well! Don't think I've forgotten how you hid the information about the Dizzy Corporation and its holdings for years!"
"Speaking of forgetting…Where is Blood Wing?" Destro asked.
"Who knows? Who cares?" Zartan groaned.
"He called before we left," Cobra Commander said. "Said he had more people to kill on his revenge list. Say what you want, but at least the man is being productive."
"I've noticed that Crystal Ball isn't here either," Mindbender looked around.
"Oh, he was being a pill so I decided to leave him behind," Cobra Commander grumbled.
"Shame we can't do the same with you," Destro muttered under his breath so low no one heard him.
"Why are we checking out Greece next?" The Baroness asked.
"Because it only has one base," Destro explained. "On the Island of Hydra."
Cobra Base 35: The Island of Hydra, Greece
"This is nice," Cobra Commander remarked as she spaceship arose from the water into an underground base. "An underwater cave under the island. Remote. Peaceful…"
BOOOM! BOOOM! BOOM!
"So much for peaceful!" Zartan winced as several rounds of gunfire blasted at the ship. "Shields are holding! No damage!"
"Who the hell is firing on us?" Cobra Commander screamed. "FIRE ON THEM! BLOW THEM UP!"
"Shouldn't we figure out who is firing on us first?" The Baroness asked.
"We can do that by looking at the uniforms of their corpses!" Cobra Commander screamed. "FIRE! DESTROY THEM!"
ZAAAP! ZZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP!
"Boy the lasers on this ship are really accurate, aren't they?" Ripper whistled.
"It's like shooting targets at the fair with an AK-47," Torch grinned as he fired.
ZAAAP! ZAAAP! ZZZAPPP! ZAPPP!
Torch turned around. "They're dead!"
Soon the Cobras had disembarked the ship. "This is how you take a base back!" Cobra Commander snarled as he disembarked the ship. "Troopers! Spread out and search the base."
"Yes, Cobra Commander!" One of the troopers saluted before they did so.
"I don't know Cobra Commander," Destro frowned as he looked at the bodies of soldiers in green all around him. "I still think we should proceed with caution. There's something about those uniforms that's familiar…"
"Destro relax," Cobra Commander waved. "Not only do we have a spaceship and ourselves but we have ten of the finest troopers Cobra…"
BANG!
"Okay make that nine of the finest troopers," Cobra Commander did a double take when one of the troopers was hit by unseen sniper fire.
BANG!
"Eight of the finest…" Cobra Commander gulped.
BANG! BANG! BANG!
"Seven…Six…" Cobra Commander counted. "Five! Okay back to the ship!"
"Hang on," Zartan did a double take. "Where's Tiffany?"
ZAAAP! ZAPP! ZAAPP!
"Oh, there she is," Zartan realized as the spaceship opened fire. "She stayed behind. Smart!"
ZAPP! ZAPPP! ZAPP!
BANG! BANG!
"THAT'S IT!" Cobra Commander shouted. "STOP THIS RIGHT NOW!"
Everyone stopped firing. "Wow that actually worked," Torch blinked.
"Who the hell are you?" Cobra Commander snarled to the soldiers in green. "And what are you doing in my base?"
"Your base?" A solider in a green uniform shouted.
"Yeah look!" Cobra Commander pointed to the wall that had a faded Cobra insignia. "See that? That's the sign of Cobra! This is a Cobra base!"
One of the soldiers in green looked at it. "You know I always wondered about that. Why that sign doesn't look like the regular Hydra symbol."
"I always assumed it was for some other unit of Hydra…" Another soldier remarked.
"Hydra?" Destro did a double take. "Uh oh…"
"Who is in charge around here?" Cobra Commander snarled. "Take me to them immediately!"
"Uh Commander…" Destro coughed. "Perhaps we should…?"
"Not now Destro!" Cobra Commander snapped. "I demand you take me to whoever your boss is right now! We need to settle this!"
"Uh okay…" One of the Hydra trooper shrugged.
"Come on!" Cobra Commander snapped to his crew. "Tiffany you stay in the ship! The rest of you! Come with me!"
"Uh Commander," Destro coughed as they followed the soldiers. "Perhaps we should…?"
"Perhaps you should shut up!" Cobra Commander snapped. "What is wrong with you?"
"I was about to ask the same question," Destro sighed.
"Commander…" Zartan gulped. "As much as I love to see you tear into Destro, I think for once you should listen to him. Even I would think twice about messing with Hydra…"
"Oh please!" Cobra Commander snapped. "Hydra is nothing to be afraid of!"
"Really?" Zartan gulped. "News to me."
"What did you give him this morning?" The Baroness looked at Mindbender.
"Only his usual cocktails of some drugs and scotch," Mindbender told her. "Although I think he also downed some strong wine when I was out of the room. And possibly something I had left over from our last Christmas party."
"That would do it," The Baroness groaned.
Soon they were in a large conference room with several people seated around a large table. "All right you squatters!" Cobra Commander strode in with confidence. "I'm back! You people don't have to go home but you can't stay here! SCRAM!"
"Who dares interrupt a Hydra High Council meeting?" A woman with long black hair in a long green dress snarled.
"Me! Cobra Commander! That's who!" Cobra Commander snarled as he glared at the people in the room. "I want to know who you people are and why you're squatting in my base?"
"This is Hydra!" The woman snarled.
"And that should impress me why?" Cobra Commander snarled. "Who are you? The Hostess?"
"I am Madame Hydra!" The woman snarled.
"So, you're in charge of the hookers?" Cobra Commander remarked. "Good to know."
Madame Hydra was incensed. "I am one of Hydra's High Council you fool!"
"Oh boy…" Destro groaned.
"We're in it now," The Baroness groaned.
"Who's Hydra again?" Torch asked.
"A bunch of Cobra knock offs!" Cobra Commander snapped.
"Excuse me?" A red-haired man with a red beard, gold glasses wearing a green suit snapped. "Our organization has been around for centuries!"
"Uh yeah," Cobra Commander said. "Founded by my ancestors!"
"Your ancestors?" A man wearing a green snake skin suit and a purple cape snapped.
Cobra Commander looked at him. "You know that legend of immortal race of reptiles that came to Earth and founded all those little cabals in order to rule the world? That was a slogan my great-great uncle came up with at one of Cobra La's most prestigious advertising agencies!"
"You know about Cobra La?" Madame Hydra gasped.
"I'm from Cobra La!" Cobra Commander hissed.
"It's true," Destro sighed. "He is."
"We were there," Ripper added. "Crazy place."
"Prove it!" Another man in an armadillo costume snapped.
"What do you want? An ID?" Cobra Commander snapped. "Fine! Just let me get my helmet off…" He started to fiddle with it.
Soon he revealed his bald blue scaly face with four reptilian eyes. "See! Satisfied? Or are you going to need a prostate exam to verify my ID?"
"He does look a lot like the ancient ones," A man with a carved pumpkin on his head gasped.
"Except for the extra eyes," Madame Hydra thought aloud.
"I had a few incidents," Cobra Commander rolled them. "But I can assure you I am Cobra La through and through!"
"Wait," The Baroness remembered something. "Weren't you gold? When I used the Dragonfire to return you to semi-human form when you were a snake."
"It changed a while back to my true color," Cobra Commander explained. "And for some reason two of my extra eyes returned. I mean it's better than it was before when I had like twenty eyes…"
"Actually, it's kind of a good look on you," Torch remarked. "Don't really need the helmet."
"That's your opinion," A female council member with a green uniform and black hair winced.
"Well it's a little more complicated than just hiding my good looks," Cobra Commander explained. "See my species is cold blooded and for some reason our faces are really susceptible to the cold…"
"Oh, I get it," Monkeywrench nodded.
"And the uniforms of course are insulated," Cobra Commander added. "Plus, my species needs a little more moisture for our eyes to be truly comfortable so there are temperature controls…"
"You had twenty eyes?" The red bearded man asked.
Cobra Commander rolled all four of them. "I got mutated at least four times during my life. Long story. Don't want to go into the details."
"Don't want to hear them. Put the helmet back on!" Madame Hydra winced.
"Who are you blokes again?" Monkeywrench asked. "And why are you all just sitting around here."
"We're having a meeting," The man in the armadillo costume explained. "At least we were!"
"We are Hydra's High Command," The red bearded man said. "I'm Dr. Faustus. That's King Cobra…" He pointed to the man in the green snake outfit.
"King Cobra?" Cobra Commander hissed as he finished putting his helmet back on. "Who crowned you King Cobra?"
"It was either this or Lord Hippo!" King Cobra snapped. "And I couldn't fit into the uniform. Besides I have very limber muscles. And I can slither like a cobra…"
"Who can't?" Cobra Commander asked. "I'm seriously asking!"
"Any-way…" Dr. Faustus sighed. "That's Elisa Sinclair the Queen of Witches, Viper…"
"I thought you were Viper?" The Baroness pointed to Madame Hydra.
"I got promoted," Madame Hydra said. "This is the new Viper."
"Hello!" The dark-haired woman in green waved.
"Count Otto Vermis the Second," Dr. Faustus pointed to another man.
"Weren't you killed?" Destro asked. "In a jet incident?"
"That was my father," Count Vermis II coughed. "Count Vermis the First."
"The Armadillo," Dr. Faustus pointed to other men in costumes. "Gypsy Moth, Dragonfly, Hydra Knight, Rock Python, The Wizard, Jack O'Lantern…"
"What is this?" Cobra Commander asked. "A terrorist group or a Halloween party?"
"You're one to talk!" The Armadillo snapped.
"And rounding out the council," Dr. Faustus added. "Are Mr. Unknown, The Eliminator and Dr. Expendable."
"What?" Dr. Expendable did a double take.
"So, which one of you is Hydra's supreme leader?" Destro asked.
"That's what this meeting is about," Dr. Faustus admitted. "We've had some turnover these past few months."
"I thought Baron Zemo was in charge?" The Baroness asked.
"He was," Madame Hydra admitted. "But there were some incidents with him and his son. Last time we saw him he was being sucked into an inter-dimensional wormhole. And you know how those things drag out."
"What about Red Skull?" The Baroness asked.
"Also stuck in the same inter-dimensional wormhole," Madame Hydra sighed. "Kind of a relief actually."
"That Modok thing?" Destro asked.
"He is the one who caused the inter-dimensional wormhole," Madame Hydra sighed. "And sucked into it. Also, a great relief."
"What about the Von Strucker family?" Destro asked.
"Dead," Madame Hydra counted off. "Dead. In prison. Dead. Left us to run their own corporation. Dead. Betrayed us then was killed. Dead. Went to be an actor. Dead. Dead. Lost in the Amazon rainforest. Dead. Prison. Lost in another dimension…"
"That particular dynasty is just not working out this century," Dr. Faustus sighed.
"Gorgon?" Destro asked.
"He left to lead his own organization," Dr. Faustus admitted.
"Edgar Lascombe?" Destro asked.
"Heart attack," Madame Hydra told him.
"Graviton?" Xamot asked.
"Heart attack," Madame Hydra admitted.
"Mister Hyde?" Tomax asked.
"Heart attack," Madame Hydra told him.
"Count Nefaria?" Destro asked.
"Also, heart attack," Madame Hydra sighed. "Apparently Hydra can fight everything except high cholesterol."
"Arnold Brown?" The Baroness asked.
"Left us for a modeling gig," Madame Hydra admitted. "Honestly it's a better fit."
"Kraven the Hunter?" Zartan asked.
"Currently in talks for his own reality show," Dr. Faustus told them.
"I'd watch that," Ripper admitted.
"Lord Hippo?" Torch asked.
"Heart attack," King Cobra said. "No surprises there."
"Excuse me," Dr. Expendable raised his hand. "I don't want to interrupt, but I never agreed for Dr. Expendable to be my codename."
"I thought Kingpin was one of you," The Baroness asked.
"He'd rather do his own thing," Dr. Faustus admitted. "Honestly he's more valuable as an ally. Plus, he said he'd make more money without us."
"We know the feeling," Xamot groaned.
"Testify," Tomax added. Cobra Commander glared at them.
"I'd like to talk about my codename here," Dr. Expendable spoke up.
"What is your problem?" Mr. Unknown snapped. "You're on the freaking High Council! You should be honored to have a codename!"
"I really don't like the name Dr. Expendable," Dr. Expendable added. "It has some very negative connotations."
"Try being called King Cobra sometime," King Cobra said. "That's not exactly positive either."
"Yes, but Dr. Expendable has some really bad vibes if you get my drift," Dr. Expendable added.
"Look we've been over this," Dr. Faustus snapped. "There's been a Dr. Expendable since 1942. You're the hundred and fifty seventh one! That's it! End of story!"
"There! That is the problem!" Dr. Expendable snapped. "157th Dr. Expendable? That means that there has been 156 Dr. Expendables during the past 72 years! That averages at least two Dr. Expendables per year!"
"There were five Dr. Expendables in 1945," The Armadillo spoke up.
"Yeah that was really bad year for Hydra," Dr. Faustus agreed.
"I know the feeling," Destro sighed.
"Can we skip the 'Getting To Know You' part and find out what the hell these people are doing in our base?" Mr. Unknown snapped.
"This is a Cobra base, you wannabees!" Cobra Commander shouted.
"Since when?" Dr. Faustus shouted. "We took over this base twelve years ago!"
"You stole our base?" Cobra Commander screamed.
"It's not stealing when something has been abandoned for twelve years!" Madame Hydra snapped.
"Oh, I get it!" Torch spoke up. "Hydra! And it's on the island of Hydra. Yeah that makes sense."
"I'm glad something does around here," Zarana groaned.
"I can't believe you losers are still around," Viper growled.
"Who are you calling losers?" Cobra Commander snapped. "Last I checked your organization wasn't exactly batting a thousand! You people tried taking over the world three times in sixty years and you screwed up every single time!"
"It's been seven times," Dr. Faustus snapped. "And you idiots fail every other week!"
"Yeah but we succeed all those other weeks!" Torch added. "Most of the time."
"At least in my organization I don't murder my subordinates over any little mistake or failure!" Cobra Commander snapped.
"Yeah!" Torch shouted. "If Cobra Commander did that, he'd have nobody left!"
"Including himself," Monkeywrench nodded.
Cobra Commander paused. "Then again I do see your point on that matter…"
"You have to admit," Viper spoke up. "Our turnover rate is a little high compared to Cobra's."
"In our case not high enough," The Baroness groaned.
"Let's be honest," Elisa Sinclair spoke up. "Hydra is severely lacking in qualified personnel."
"Is that a crack at us?" Dr. Expendable snapped.
"I don't see anyone else named Dr. Expendable!" King Cobra snapped.
"I didn't choose that codename and you know it!" Dr. Expendable snapped.
"Oh, big talk from a guy in a green costume with a gaudy purple cape that would make Prince throw up!" Mr. Unknown shouted.
"We could definitely use more qualified people in management," Dr. Faustus agreed.
"Just out of curiosity," Mindbender spoke up. "What kind of medical and dental benefits do you have?"
"WHAT?" Cobra Commander shouted.
"It doesn't hurt to network!" Mindbender protested.
"Maybe we can trade some people?" The Baroness pointed to the Dreadnoks.
"What?" Zartan snapped.
"Hang on," Buzzer spoke up. "What's the pay grade here for mercenary work?"
"And what's the soda and donut situation like?" Torch asked.
"Yeah this might be an upgrade for us!" Ripper agreed.
"It would definitely be an upgrade for us," Destro admitted.
"Are you hiring?" One of the remaining Cobra Troopers asked.
"We could really use a good dental plan," Another Cobra Trooper added.
"WILL ALL OF YOU IDIOTS SHUT UP?" Cobra Commander screamed.
"Okay so do we kill them now or…?" Gypsy Moth asked.
"I don't think we can," Armadillo spoke up. "Well Cobra Commander anyway. And it might not be a bad idea to keep some of those people alive."
"Why can't we kill Cobra Commander?" Dr. Expendable snapped. "He's more expendable than I am!"
"I am not!" Cobra Commander shouted.
"Because if he is from Cobra La there's a protocol we have to follow," Dr. Faustus groaned. "Thanks to the original leaders of Hydra they put a clause saying that he and all his kind are technically leaders of Hydra!"
"WHAT?" Everyone else in the room shouted.
"That can't be right!" Madame Hydra snapped.
"It's part of the charter," Dr. Faustus protested.
"I say we re-write it!" Dr. Expendable snapped. "It's been done before!"
"I'd rather recruit Destro, the Baroness and Mindbender before sparing Cobra Crud-mander!" Hydra Knight spoke up. "They're the only reasons that organization is even around in the first place!"
"WHAT?" Cobra Commander screamed.
"I think we might be better off if we incorporate Cobra into Hydra," The Wizard spoke up.
"I think that's the stupidest idea I have ever heard," Viper looked at him. "If we're going to keep anybody in that group it's the Crimson Twins. They would be good in business. And some of the troopers to replace the people they killed."
"What about us Dreadnoks?" Torch asked.
"What about you?" Dr. Faustus grimaced.
"I say we kill all of them before they cause even more damage!" Dr. Expendable snapped. "If it was up to me…"
"Well it's not isn't it?" Madame Hydra snapped.
"Not yet," Dr. Expendable pouted.
"Yeah keep dreaming buddy," Gypsy Moth snorted.
"I have a better shot than you!" Dr. Expendable snapped.
"ENOUGH!" Dr. Faustus shouted. "All right, here is what we are going to do. We lock up the Cobras until we elect a supreme leader. Then the leader gets to decide what to do with them! Agreed?"
"Or you could just skip the stupid vote," Cobra Commander hissed. "And elect me as your supreme leader, which I am by birthright! And together Hydra and Cobra will combine into one massive organization to rule the world!"
Ten minutes later….
"God, I hate Hydra," Cobra Commander grumbled as the Cobras waited in a large cell.
"I can't believe they locked us up…" Xamot grumbled.
"But our remaining Cobra Troopers…" Tomax added.
"They recruited on the spot!" The Twins said as one.
"Well they needed to replace the people we killed," Mindbender sighed.
"I think I just figured out why Crystal Ball didn't want to come on this mission," Zartan groaned.
"Shut up!" Cobra Commander snapped.
"I tried to warn you!" Destro snapped. "But nooooooooooooo! You wouldn't listen to me!"
"And now we're stuck listening to Destro…" Tomax grumbled.
"Way to go Chrome Dome," Xamot glared at Cobra Commander.
"I swear the second I'm able to make a shiv…" Cobra Commander snarled.
Monkeywrench spoke up. "Hang on, Cobra La has advertising agencies?"
"Well technically propaganda agencies," Cobra Commander admitted. "They do a lot of work for the government. But they also do work for businesses as well. Mostly real estate agencies and soft drinks. But yes."
"There's one thing that's always bothered me," Zandar spoke up.
"One thing?" Zarana asked.
"Cobra La had an issue with humans using inorganic technology, right?" Zandar asked.
"Yes," Cobra Commander sighed.
"Then why did they send you to conquer the world using inorganic technology?" Zandar asked. "Instead of using Cobra La technology? That doesn't make sense."
"It makes perfect sense," Cobra Commander said. "I wasn't given Cobra La technology because they didn't want it to fall into the hands of the human race! It was part of the whole secrecy thing!"
"Ohhh," Ripper nodded.
"That does make sense," Monkeywrench said.
"It also helped me create a more believable backstory," Cobra Commander mused. "I claimed to be a former used car salesman whose family got killed in a car accident and I got tired of how the world was run."
"That is more believable," The Baroness admitted.
"I changed it around over the years," Cobra Commander said. "I made up an older brother who went to Vietnam on several tours so I didn't have to go. This gave him deep psychological problems as well as an alcohol addiction…"
"Runs in the family I see," Destro remarked.
"I was an only child!" Cobra Commander snapped. "Mostly."
"Mostly?" Zartan asked.
"Don't ask," Cobra Commander waved. "Anyway, the story went that my brother was the one who got killed in a car crash. As the years rolled on, I added the part about Snake Eyes' family being killed in that crash as well and in my grief, I vowed revenge on him. Yada, yada, yada…"
"Why?" The Baroness asked.
"Well I was going through a phase at the time," Cobra Commander sighed. "See back then almost all the major criminals and terrorists had a nemesis and I thought having a bad ass like Snake Eyes would give me street cred. And the fact that his family was actually killed by an actual drunk driver made it even more credible…"
"You didn't think once Snake Eyes got word of what you said it would piss him off didn't you?" Zartan realized.
"Honestly I thought he would only get slightly miffed," Cobra Commander admitted.
"That explains why he was always trying to slice us all to pieces with his sword," Torch blinked.
"Slightly miffed is a bloody understatement!" Buzzer snapped.
"Well it was a good idea at the time," Cobra Commander said. "Remember when GI Joe had their own comic book for a time? I pitched the whole Snake Eyes angle to the guy after I tried to tell him my real origins. But he said it was complete and total garbage that wasn't believable so…"
"You see his point, right?" The Baroness asked.
"Hey it was the 80's!" Cobra Commander protested. "Completely unrealistic and whacked out was in!"
The sounds of a struggle were heard. Then a Hydra trooper walked up to the cell. "Hello!" Blood Wing removed the mask and revealed his face. "Fancy meeting you here!"
"Speaking of unrealistic…" Destro did a double take.
"What are you doing here?" Cobra Commander asked.
"A couple of my enemies are in Hydra," Blood Wing explained. "So, I snuck in undercover to take them out. I was going to you know? Murder them when I saw what happened."
"Well why didn't you say so?" Cobra Commander said cheerfully. "We'll help!"
"Yeah just point in the direction of the guys you want to off," Torch added. "And we'll shoot 'em!"
"Oh, what the hell?" Blood Wing let them out. "Let's all go have an old-fashioned murder rampage through a base! I haven't done one of those in ages!"
"Where's the treasury?" Destro asked. "Might as well take some souvenirs."
"As long as we get to split them up," Zartan said.
"It's right next to the armory if you can believe it," Blood Wing said.
"I do," Mindbender remarked.
"Here's the plan," Cobra Commander said. "Zartan you take your Dreadnoks and do what you do best. Cause mayhem."
"I can get behind that," Torch grinned.
"Destro, The Baroness, Mindbender, The Twins and I will steal whatever else we can find," Cobra Commander said. "And help Blood Wing kill everybody. Including those traitors who defected!"
"I bet their science department has a ton of items we can use!" Mindbender grinned.
"Like I said," Cobra Commander said. "Steal everything we can find and cause mayhem."
"That does seem to be our specialty," Destro admitted. "Let's go!"
"Hang on Destro," Cobra Commander stopped him.
"Let me guess," Destro sighed. "You want to give the order?"
"Actually, this time I need to go," Cobra Commander grumbled. "I knew I shouldn't have had two cups of Irish Coffee."
"Why don't you just pee in the corner?" Torch asked.
Cobra Commander looked at him. "I'm not an animal. Besides it's both numbers if you get my drift."
"Down the hall across from the treasury," Blood Wing groaned.
"Fine, we'll loot while you take a bathroom break," Destro groaned. "May we go now?"
"I was about to ask that myself," Cobra Commander winced.
Ten minutes later….
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Gypsy Moth screamed as his wings and body was on fire. He ran down the hallway in agony.
"HA HA HA HA!" Torch laughed as he chased him with his flamethrower. "Hey! You can't be dead already! Get back up so I can chase you some more."
Cobra Commander walked out of the bathroom. "That is a nice bathroom," Cobra Commander remarked. "I have to admit their interior decorator isn't that bad."
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
"AAAAHHHH!" Several Hydra troopers fled in panic.
"Run! Run! Run!" Blood Wing cackled as he followed them, catching one and killing him with his bare hands. "Muah, ha ha ha!"
He saw Cobra Commander. "Oh, hey Cobra Commander."
"Hey," Cobra Commander replied. "Did you know the bathrooms here are really nice?"
"You used the executive one, didn't you?" Blood Wing asked. "Yeah they are good."
"How's it going?" Cobra Commander asked.
"Pretty well actually," Blood Wing remarked. "Mindbender and some of the Dreadnoks looted the labs. Destro, the Twins and the Baroness are looting the treasury."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Armadillo and Dragonfly ran from Torch, their clothes slightly singed.
"BURN BABIES BURN!" Torch cackled.
"Torch is having a good time," Blood Wing added.
"Just out of curiosity," Cobra Commander paused. "What did Hydra ever do to piss you off?"
"Short version?" Blood Wing sighed. "My ex-girlfriend joined them and they wouldn't let me join. Then there was a really bad breakup at a party…Long story."
"Been there," Cobra Commander nodded. "Couple questions…One where is the treasury? And two where is the control room?"
"Both are this way," Blood Wing pointed. "The control room is five doors down from the treasury believe it or not."
"This used to be a Cobra base," Cobra Commander said as they walked down the hallway. "I believe it."
"What I couldn't believe is how disorganized so-called Hydra Command is," Blood Wing said as they walked down the hall, ignoring the screams and the sound of gunfire. "I mean I thought Cobra was disorganized…No offense."
"Eh," Cobra Commander sighed. "I've been meaning to do some restructuring but who has the time?"
"Yeah well compared to these jokers at least you have some of your act together," Blood Wing said. "After the last three world domination plots tanked and they lost most of their higher-ranking members…Hydra has been sliding a bit. Of course, it doesn't help that the Avengers and SHIELD are on their tail. Breaking up bases and factions like they're pinatas."
"I know that feeling," Cobra Commander nodded. "Like us and GI Joe. Those goody-goodies are always causing problems."
"Then of course there's the usual infighting and backstabbing that happens in a lot of organizations," Blood Wing added.
"Testify," Cobra Commander nodded.
"Let's be honest," Blood Wing said. "They lost a lot of good people due to the one mistake and you are dead rule. So, a guy doesn't make a cup of coffee you want the right way? He's still a good systems analyzer! No need to shoot him to make an example of him."
"That's what tasers are for," Cobra Commander nodded. "Or you know? Send him to Mindbender's labs or something."
"Exactly," Blood Wing nodded. "Another thing I've noticed about Cobra is that most of you are not half as stuck up as Hydra is."
"They are rather snooty, aren't they?" Cobra Commander asked.
"They are!" Blood Wing nodded.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Armadillo screamed as he died a horrible death in the hallway as they walked by.
"Oh, we're Hydra," Cobra Commander mocked. "You cut one head off another one grows back! Blah! Blah! Blah! Big whoop! My head has been figuratively cut off like three times and I'm still here!"
"That says much more about an organization's staying power," Blood Wing nodded.
"Any organization can just replace people constantly," Cobra Commander added. "Look at the retail industry!"
"Hold it right there!" King Cobra snared as he and Jack O Lantern blocked their way.
"See? Look at these clowns!" Cobra Commander pointed. "Talk about the D list making it big!"
"I know right?" Blood Wing scoffed.
"You two losers are gonna get it now!" King Cobra made a fist.
"Blood Wing we should have destroyed you years ago when we had the chance!" Jack O Lantern snarled.
"You take the other snake," Blood Wing said. "I'll take Pumpkin Head." He then leapt at Jack O' Lantern to fight with him. "Who are you calling a loser? At least I don't wear a fruit on my head!"
"Pumpkins are fruit?" Cobra Commander mused. "Huh. Learn something new every day."
"So, Cobra Commander," King Cobra hissed as he flexed his fists. "It's come to this! We shall discover which of us is the true supreme lord of all snakes!"
"Okay," Cobra Commander said casually as he shot King Cobra dead. "That was rather anti-climactic."
"Aww," Blood Wing frowned as he stood over Jack O' Lantern's corpse. "He was one of the guys on my list. Oh well. Can't have everything."
"Was the Scarecrow rip off here on the list too?" Cobra Commander pointed.
"Yes, he was," Blood Wing nodded. "Two out of three isn't bad so far."
"Who's the third you already killed?" Cobra Commander asked.
"Steve from Accounting," Blood Wing admitted. "I also wiped out the entire accounting department by the way. They were having a meeting down the hall before I rescued you. Ironically they put up more of a fight than this."
"See that's how you cripple an organization," Cobra Commander said. "Take out their means of financial support!"
"Screw cutting off the head," Blood Wing remarked. "Let's take their wallets!"
Speaking of which…
"I got this joker's wallet!" Zarana took out a wallet from the fallen Hydra Knight. Several of the Dreadnoks were making their way to the spaceship carrying loads of stolen goods.
"Technically he's a knight…" Zandar remarked as he shot some Hydra troops that were fleeing.
"How did he die?" Zartan asked as he casually shot a few more retreating troops. "He's wearing a freaking suit of armor!"
"Fun fact," Zarana looked at him. "Metal armor doesn't do well against laser blasts."
"Oh right," Zartan snorted. "Duh!"
"That explains the smell," Ripper nodded.
"Stealing his wallet?" Destro sighed as he and the others carried several huge loads. "Really?"
"Why not use his credit cards?" Zartan asked. "He doesn't need them anymore."
"They have a point," Mindbender remarked. "Oh, I can't wait to study some of these scientific wonders."
"You will study nothing but oblivion!" The Wizard stormed up to them.
"Ugh and people complain about our outfits," Zarana looked at the Wizard's outfit. It was blue and full of stars with a pointy hat and he had a long beard.
"Seriously," Mindbender said. "You look like a bad Dumbledore rip-off! It's so tacky!"
"And this is from a man who wears a purple cape and no shirt," Destro pointed out.
"I, the Wizard will use my magic to…" The Wizard held up his wand.
BANG!
"Little tip," The Baroness casually said as she held her weapon as well as a large bag. "Magic wands only work if you're faster than a gun."
"Which he wasn't," Destro remarked as the Wizard's body fell to the floor. "Nice shot."
"I thought so," The Baroness nodded.
Blood Wing and Cobra Commander ran up to them. "Who killed the Wizard?"
"I did," The Baroness grinned. "With a gun. In the hall."
"Eh, one more on my list I don't have to worry about," Blood Wing remarked. "You all seem to have a lot of things."
"It was pretty easy to get them," Mindbender said. "Once we got rid of the guards."
"BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOP! BLOOOOOOOOP! BLOOOP!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"
"You sicced an Eddie Junior on them, didn't you?" Cobra Commander asked.
"Hey it made a great distraction," Mindbender shrugged.
"What's an Eddie Junior?" Blood Wing asked.
"Don't ask," Destro sighed.
"Okay, Destro, Blood Wing and Mindbender come with me," Cobra Commander ordered. "We've got some business in the command center. The rest of you take the loot back to the spaceship!"
"Where's Torch?" Ripper looked around.
"We saw him burning some bodies down the hall," Blood Wing told him.
"Get him and get on the ship," Cobra Commander took out his blaster. "I have a few things to say to Hydra's so-called High Command."
"And I have a few things to say to my ex-girlfriend," Blood Wing agreed.
"Ex-girlfriend?" Destro asked.
"Elisa Sinclair," Blood Wing admitted. "We used to date. Had a bad breakup."
"Say no more," Zartan said.
"Been there," Destro nodded.
"Destro you've been there so often you get your mail there!" Cobra Commander quipped. "Let's go!"
Soon the Baroness and the others made it to the hangar where the ship was. "Hang on," Zartan realized. "I just remembered something!"
"There's a bathroom in the ship," The Baroness snapped.
"Not that!" Zartan snapped. "Wouldn't Hydra have confiscated our ship by now?"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
"Apparently not," The Baroness remarked as some Hydra agents were thrown out of the starship.
"BOO-YAAAAAAA!" Tiffany was heard yelling from inside. "Who else wants some?"
"Oh right," Zartan realized. "We left Tiffany in the ship."
"BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
"AAAAHHH!" Count Vernis screamed as he ran out of the ship with some troopers, some of them the former Cobras. Behind him was Chompers biting him on the behind.
"You brought the goat too?" Zandar asked.
"Goats are great guard animals," Monkeywrench said proudly.
"BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
"Can't argue with the evidence," Zartan remarked.
Rock Python was there with his squad looking at the scene. "Oh, for the love of…" He groaned. "We really need new people on the High Council."
"Well there are a lot of openings," The Baroness remarked as she held her blaster at him. The others readied their weapons. "And it looks like another one is just about to open."
"Oh, you really think you can scare us?" Rock Python snarled.
"Well you don't scare us," Zartan remarked as he held his blaster. "You're just a muscular guy in a brown snake suit."
"A bad brown snake suit," Zarana added.
"Nothing we haven't seen before," Zandar agreed.
"BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
"AAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Count Vernis screamed as he ran around being chased by Chompers.
"We've seen that too," Zartan added.
"Excuse me?" Rock Python snarled. "Do you know who I am? I'm Rock Python of the Serpent Society! One of the most feared members of this organization! I am a man whose bones are almost very nearly indestructible!"
"Almost very nearly?" The Baroness asked.
"My skin is hard! My muscles are hard!" Rock Python posed. "Come at me with everything you have! For it will not be enough!"
"Okay," Tiffany walked out of the spaceship with a mini rocket launcher.
KA-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
"Well what do you know?" Tiffany remarked as she looked at the bloody mess that was once Rock Python. "It was enough."
"A little too much," The Baroness winced. "Kind of overkill."
"Speaking of which…" Xamot remarked as he and his brother glared at Count Vernis and the remaining soldiers.
"Any of you want to try your luck?" Tomax added.
"RETREAT!" Count Vernis screamed. "RETREAT!" He and the remaining soldiers fled with him. They ran into a nearby submarine to escape.
"BAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Chompers bleated as he gnawed on what was left of the Count's pants.
"That'll do, goat," Monkeywrench petted him on the head. "That'll do."
"Nice to see we're not the only ones that do that," Zartan remarked as the submarine left.
"It is kind of a relief isn't it?" The Baroness asked.
"I don't feel like it's such a stigma anymore," Zandar admitted. "I mean if other so-called leaders do it…"
"Speaking of which," Zarana realized. "What is our so-called leader planning?"
Meanwhile…
"This is not a good plan!" Destro hissed to Cobra Commander. "Just waltzing into the control room and confronting Hydra!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" A scream of a Hydra soldier dying was heard in the distance.
"What's left of Hydra," Blood Wing quipped.
Meanwhile in Hydra's control room things were not going well…
"What the hell is that blobby thing?" Madame Hydra snarled as she saw the Eddie Junior wreaking havoc on the security cameras.
"Whatever it is, it's eating everything in sight," Dr. Faustus grumbled.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
"And everyone," Dr. Faustus groaned.
Viper, Dr. Expendable and Elisa Sinclair were in the room as well. "Dr. Expendable go out and help our troops," Viper ordered.
"The hell I will!" Dr. Expendable snapped. "I'm not going out there! You go out there!"
"I'm in charge of security for this room!" Viper snapped.
"Well I feel pretty secure right here!" Dr. Expendable snapped. "You go out there."
"I am not going out there!" Viper snapped.
"Look I didn't join this council just to die within the first couple of days!" Dr. Expendable snapped. "I'm in the science department anyway! What do you want me to do? Throw a couple of test tubes at them?"
"How about Sinclair goes out there?" Viper sighed. "What about it?"
"I would," Elisa Sinclair told him. "But Madame Hydra and Dr. Faustus need me in case they need to use my magic for an emergency escape."
"Oh, how convenient!" Dr. Expendable snapped. "I'm not going out there."
"Well somebody has to go out there!" Viper snapped.
"That somebody isn't me!" Dr. Expendable snapped back.
"We really need to recruit some new people," Dr. Faustus sighed to Madame Hydra.
"No kidding?" Madame Hydra said sarcastically.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"
"That's going to be difficult," Viper noticed what was going on the screens. "That blob thing just at the head of our HR department."
"I am not going out there!" Dr. Expendable folded his arms.
They were stunned when the two Hydra troopers that were guarding the entrance were killed by blaster fire. "Heeeeeeerre's Cobra!" Cobra Commander said cheerfully as his team ran in.
"Then again," Dr. Expendable cowered behind a chair. "Maybe I should go out there?"
"And you wonder why we call you Dr. Expendable?" Viper snapped.
"Hello Darling," Blood Wing snarled as he swaggered into the room.
"YOU!" Elisa Sinclair gasped.
"Me!" Blood Wing smirked.
"I thought you were dead!" Elisa Sinclair snapped.
"I got better," Blood Wing shrugged.
"Not him again," Madame Hydra groaned.
"Who's he?" Dr. Expendable asked.
"My bastard ex-boyfriend," Elisa Sinclair explained.
"Call me Blood Wing," The vampire smirked.
"You have a code name now?" Elisa Sinclair was stunned. "I thought you said that code names were weird?"
"I changed my mind," Blood Wing snapped. "I'm allowed to do that now that I'm no longer dating you!"
"Since when do you hang around with these losers?" Elisa Sinclair snapped. "Although I can understand why. Like attracts like."
"You've become a very bitter little woman since I dumped you," Blood Wing snapped.
"YOU DIDN'T DUMP ME!" Elisa Sinclair snapped. "I DUMPED YOU!"
"Oh God…" Dr. Faustus groaned. "This is just like the New Year's Eve Party of 1999 all over again."
"What New Year's Eve party?" Viper asked.
"You weren't with the organization then," Madame Hydra sighed. "Let's just say those two made it a night we couldn't forget even if we tried!"
"Sounds like our Cobra parties," Mindbender remarked.
"I had to move to a different apartment because there was so much blood on my furniture, I couldn't get it out!" Madame Hydra snapped. "Not to mention we lost several people on Hydra's High Command."
"This is exactly like the New Year's Eve Party of 1999," Dr. Faustus groaned.
"It's not like…" Madame Hydra began.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
Madame Hydra looked at the mayhem on the monitor. "Okay I was wrong. You were right Dr. Faustus. This is exactly like that New Year's Eve party."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"
Madame Hydra looked at the monitors. "With the exception of the giant blob running around everywhere."
"My Eddie Juniors do cause wonderful damage," Dr. Mindbender grinned.
"Eddie Juniors?" Dr. Faustus asked.
"Don't ask," Destro sighed. "Look as much as I'd love to see someone else's love life be more of a mess than mine…"
Viper then realized something. "Speaking of messes…" She looked at her feet. "What? The base is leaking?"
"Well this base is under an island surrounded by the ocean so…" Dr. Faustus groaned.
"Great!" Elisa Sinclair snapped as water started to lap in. "I just bought these new boots!"
"The boots are the least of your problems," Cobra Commander sneered. He had made use of the distraction by going to a console and had been pushing buttons.
"What are you doing?" Madame Hydra shouted.
"If Cobra can't have this base," Cobra Commander snapped. "Nobody can have this base!" He pushed the self-destruct button.
"Self-Destruct in ten minutes…" A computer voice spoke.
"You slimy bastard!" Madame Hydra screeched as she shot at Cobra Commander.
Cobra Commander dodged out of the way. The shots hit the control panel which caught on fire. "Great shooting!" Dr. Faustus snapped. "Now I can't override the self-destruct button even if I had a chance to!"
"We need to go," Destro coughed. "NOW!"
"As much fun as this has been catching up," Blood Wing said as the Cobras fled. "I think it's time to leave!"
"IT'S TIME TO DIE!" Elisa Sinclair powered up some energy from her hands.
"DON'T!" Dr. Expendable shouted. "Don't use that weird electric blast you can do!"
"WHY NOT?" Elisa Sinclair screeched.
"BECAUSE WE'RE ALL STANDING IN WATER YOU IDIOT!" Dr. Expendable shouted.
"DON'T CALL ME IDIOT, IDIOT!" Elisa Sinclair screamed. "Great! They're gone! You let them get away!"
"Actually, I think in this case Dr. Expendable had a point," Dr. Faustus groaned.
"Oh, don't you start!" Elisa Sinclair shouted.
"I think we should start evacuating this base ourselves!" Viper snapped.
Meanwhile back on the spaceship…
"We're not evacuating until the others arrive!" The Baroness said to the others on the spaceship.
"Now hang on," Zartan said. "Should we really wait for those guys?"
"Yeah let's think about this," Zarana added.
"I say we put it to a vote," Torch spoke up.
"For once Torch has a smart idea!" Zartan agreed. "I say we vote too!"
"I vote that we vote," Ripper nodded.
"Since when is this a democracy?" The Baroness snapped.
"If it wasn't for Destro you wouldn't even be arguing about this with us!" Zarana snapped.
"Well that's a given," The Baroness admitted. "But we are not leaving without Destro!"
"Okay how about a compromise?" Xamot asked.
"We wait for Destro but leave Cobra Commander behind?" Tomax asked.
"That way everybody wins!" Torch agreed.
"I would agree to that if there wasn't one tiny flaw in that plan," The Baroness said.
"What's that?" Zartan asked.
"RETREAT! RETREAT!" Cobra Commander was heard. "BUT NOT WITHOUT ME!"
"Oh right," Zartan realized. "Cobra Commander can run faster than any of us."
"To be fair he's had plenty of practice running away over the decades," Torch agreed. "I bet if Cobra La ever joined the Olympics he'd get a gold medal easy."
"Well we know that," Zartan said. "Even if he didn't win, he's good at picking locks."
"DAMN IT COMMANDER!" Destro was heard. "WAIT UP FOR THE REST OF US!"
"Go! Go! Go!" Cobra Commander panted as he dashed into the spaceship.
"Not without the others!" The Baroness snapped.
"She won't leave Destro," Torch said. "We tried to put it to a vote."
"Again," The Baroness snapped. "Not a democracy!"
"What about a compromise?" Cobra Commander asked. "We wait for Destro and leave Mindbender behind?"
"What about Blood Wing?" Zandar asked.
"He's an immortal vampire," Cobra Commander panted. "He'll be fine either way!"
"Nice of you to say so!" Blood Wing snapped as the others ran on board the ship.
"Okay! Everybody's here!" Zartan rolled his eyes. "Now can we go?"
"YES!" Everyone else shouted.
Soon the spaceship had zipped out of the harbor. And just in time…
KAAAAAAAAAAAAABOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
"Well that was a close one," Torch whistled as he looked at the large cloud of debris out of the spaceship window.
FOOM!
"Oh crap…" Blood Wing was now in his turkey form. "So this ship can't protect me from sunlight. Good to know!"
"And knowing is…" Ripper began.
"Shut up!" Destro snapped. "Well that was unfortunate."
"What do you mean?" Cobra Commander asked. "We stole a lot of Hydra's assets and kicked Hydra in the fangs. This was a good day!"
"We lost another base," Destro began.
"Eh," Cobra Commander waved. "Not that big a loss to be honest."
"And now we've made another enemy," Destro sighed. "Among the survivors."
"Oh, big bad Hydra," Cobra Commander scoffed. "I'm so scared!"
"You should be at least concerned about reprisals," The Baroness warned. "Hydra will not take this infringement lying down."
"They have to find us first," Cobra Commander scoffed. "Good luck with that. Besides, those stuck up copycats have needed a good butt kicking for years! And if they come after us, we'll beat them again!"
"I'm amazed we beat them this time," Tiffany remarked.
"It's nice to have a win once in a while isn't it?" Torch grinned.
Meanwhile back on the island…
"They will pay…" Madame Hydra snarled as she emerged from the rubble of the ruined base on the surface of the island. There were a few troopers and other members of Hydra still with her. "Cobra will pay…"
"Good thing Sinclair had some protection and teleportation spells," Viper grumbled.
"TROOPER BOB!" Madame Hydra snarled. "Are you still alive?"
"Ma'mm! Yes, Ma'mm…" A disheveled Hydra trooper covered in dust popped up.
"Good…Okay…" Madame Hydra coughed to the assembled group. "First order of business…I am now Supreme Leader of Hydra! Anyone have a problem with that?"
"I think anyone who did is dead now," Elisa Sinclair grumbled as she brushed rubble off of her torn dress.
"Are you sure?" Dr. Faustus asked.
"Well let's go down the list," Viper said sarcastically. "Half of our troops and personnel have either been burned, shot, eaten or buried alive in that cave in!"
"Or drowned," Elisa Sinclair looked at several bodies in the water.
"I think most of those people were shot," Viper corrected her. "Or burned…"
"King Cobra was shot by Cobra Commander," Dr. Faustus reported. "Jack O'Lantern and possibly the entire accounting department was killed by Blood Wing…"
"Not Steve!" Elisa Sinclair gasped.
"Steve's dead," Viper said. "Armadillo, Gypsy Moth and Dragonfly were burned alive."
"I never did like those guys anyway," Madame Hydra admitted.
"The Wizard got shot by the Baroness," Dr. Faustus added.
"Didn't like him either," Elisa Sinclair admitted. "Hydra Knight is also dead."
Viper groaned. "I told him that stupid armor was useless! Did not like that guy."
"I liked Steve!" Elisa Sinclair snapped.
"Everybody liked Steve!" Dr. Faustus told her. "He was the one who always brought in the best donuts. And got me a really good tax refund."
"Where's Count Vernis?" Madame Hydra asked.
"The coward fled at the first sign of firefighting," Elisa Sinclair growled. "Took some of our troops and those Cobra recruits with him."
"He's off the council, now right?" Viper asked.
"Definitely," Madame Hydra growled.
"I second the motion," Dr. Faustus snarled. "What happened to Rock Python?"
"What's left of him is probably crushed beneath the rubble," A Hydra Trooper spoke up.
"The Eliminator?" Madame Hydra asked.
"Got eliminated by that blob thing," Another Hydra Trooper added.
"What happened to Mr. Unknown?" Viper asked.
"Who knows?" Dr. Faustus groaned. "Where's Dr. Expendable?"
"I think he's dead," Viper said.
"HELP ME!" Dr. Expendable was heard screaming. "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SOMEBODY HELP ME! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
"Oh, there he is," Trooper Bob pointed to the ocean. "How did he get out there?"
"I teleported him in there," Elisa Sinclair told them. "What? He was annoying me!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
Viper gulped. "He's getting attacked by a shark. Scratch that. Eaten by a shark. Now he's dead."
"Everyone else in Hydra High Command is dead, Supreme Leader," Trooper Bob saluted. "Officially."
"Great. Now we have to refill Hydra Command, again!" Dr. Faustus groaned. "I think Dr. Expendable had a point about his name."
"Not to mention a point about getting rid of Cobra," Elisa Sinclair grumbled. "And we're going to have to get rid of Blood Wing. Again."
"Trooper Bob take a note!" Madame Hydra snarled. "Cobra has now moved up to the top ten list of Hydra's enemies!"
"What number, my Supreme Leader?" Trooper Bob asked.
Madame Hydra paused. "Below the Avengers and above Mark Zuckerberg. You know what? Just take out Mark Zuckerberg and put Cobra in his place."
"Yes, my Supreme Leader," Trooper Bob nodded. "Once I find a piece of paper that hasn't been burned."
"I think defeating Cobra should be a higher priority," Dr. Faustus grumbled. "Because apparently those idiots stole…"
VRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOM!
"What now?" Madame Hydra groaned. She looked at a large jet flying towards them. "I know that jet. It's…YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!"
In the sky Tony Stark, AKA Iron Man was piloting the Quinjet. "There's the Hydra base…What's left of it."
In the jet was Captain America, Falcon, Black Widow, Hawkeye, The Hulk and Captain Marvel. "Huh, Hulk wanted to smash Hydra base…" The Hulk grunted.
"Looks like somebody beat us to it," Falcon remarked. "I wonder who?"
"And should we send them a thank you note?" Hawkeye quipped.
"Stay focused people," Captain America warned. "There are still some snakes down on the ground."
"There's some bodies floating in the ocean," Hawkeye remarked. "That one guy is getting eaten by a shark!"
"Okay so this is technically a clean-up mission," Iron Man shrugged. "I'll take it."
"Hulk could use an easy day," Hulk nodded.
Meanwhile back on the ground…
"It's the Avengers!" Madame Hydra snarled.
"Oh sure," Trooper Bob groaned. "Now they show up!"
"BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!"
"What now…?" Madame Hydra groaned.
Oozing out of the rubble of the ruined base was the Eddie Junior. "Of course, the stupid blob survived!" Madame Hydra shrieked as she grabbed her blaster.
"Oh you know the Avengers are going to blame us for this," Trooper Bob groaned.
"I hate days like this," Dr. Faustus groaned.