THE FINAL BARGAIN

The Harbinger

Once the Night Mother was gone, and the world had righted itself, I felt a sort of freedom from the suffocation of the last few months. I was able to relax in company without having to feel like a fight was about to ensue. I could converse with Galmar and Ulfric without feeling like I had to be ordered around. The opportunity to work for the Stormcloaks was always there, but I relished in the freedom from it. We completed what we set out to do. After the Night Mother left the province with her old coffin, the rest of the Companions and I gave the girl a good burial. It was near Whiterun. I know she was probably taken near Solitude when the Dark Brotherhood came but I felt she wouldn't mind where her final resting place was.

Furthermore, I could finally enjoy my time with Vilkas. We could get lost for days, strolling around caves and hidden bandit encampments. It was like being a young one again. Finding stolen treasures lost to history. Gold. Gems. Anything we could find. Vilkas played off my knowledge of history with his own trivia. I learned new things every day.

It was one of those wonderful, languid days poking around a Nordic Tomb when he asked the question. I had just turned away from an inscribing I found on a hidden wall when I saw Vilkas on his knee. At first, my heart lurched. I thought he was in pain again. His stomach was healed but his abdomen would hurt periodically. Instead, I was shocked into silence at the ring he held.

It was beautiful. A plain gold band with a purple gem in the center. He was asking to marry me, and I had no other answer besides saying "yes". We were elated. We spent the night under the stars. Enjoying each other's company and feeling the soft, almost spring breezes.

"When do you want to marry?" He asks me.

I ponder as I move my left hand above me. The moonlight was just bright enough to illuminate the beautiful cut gem in the center. After the last few months, I don't want to wait another minute. "Next week. We just need to give the guests as much notice as possible. I wouldn't mind inviting Eve and the Thieves."

He laughs, "You want them there? I thought you hated the Thieves Guild." He rubs my arm.

"I did. But I am now seeing them with fresh eyes. Maybe they're not so bad."

I had just laid my head against him, enjoying his comfort when he brings it up again. "I'm still thinking about it."

I move so I can stare him down. "You want to do it?" My heart was increasing in pace, I was worried for this moment.

"I do. The day I almost died I was scared, so scared I was destined for the Hunting Grounds. It woke me up, I'd rather be in Sovngarde." His closed eyes open and I now realize not even I could convince him to stay as a beast.

I just rest my head again. I don't want to think about it much, I knew Vilkas would want to become mortal again eventually but not so soon. I was just opening my mouth to question it again when I heard his voice.

"I can help with that."

I flinch and roll out from our relaxed position to glare at Clavicus Vile. He was sitting on a rock nearby, eating form a plate of chocolate truffles. "Want one?" He asks and holds the tray out to me.

I shake my head. "No. What do you want?"

He chomps on another truffle. His immaculate and well brushed hair blows in the breeze from the north. "Hmm, I'm not sure let me think. Oh right!" He snaps with his free hand, "We had a deal."

My heart beats faster. Vilkas moves next to me, but I fall into a crouch. After the Night Mother left us, so did all the Artifacts from me. So, I don't have the Ring of Hircine anymore for a random change. But I haven't changed into the wolf yet today. I still can.

Clavicus Vile's expression changes from that breezy amusement to something sterner. "We had a deal. Unless you want me to revoke it? That involves bending space and time…you might not like the results."

I think of our peace now. Very fragile and painstaking to carve out in this life. "What are you asking?"

He stands, the plate of truffles now gone, all that's left are his flowing green robes. "Follow me. It's easier if I show you."

Ysgramor's Tomb was the same as I first saw it. When we entered, I had a feeling I knew where this was going. I just kept a good hand in Vilkas's and the other on Grimsever. I'm not sure if more dead will awake here.

"Don't worry, they're all dead." Clavicus Vilke jokes. He fans himself with one of those ornamental ones. He was very fond of it, even in this cold.

We made our way to the center where we freed Kodlak. Two Hagraven heads lie on the ground. Recently decapitated. No bodies in sight.

I pause in the doorway. "What's the meaning of this?"

Clavicus looks at me. "I thought about it. At first, I wanted you to do a few errands for me. A man like me can never get enough errand boys. But. After our debacle with the Night Mother, I figure our next crisis might come from you."

"What?" I ask him. I feel Vilkas, strong and warm, a calming presence next to me.

"Think about it. You're a White Wolf. The most coveted being in this province. I have no doubt immortals and mortals alike would scour Nirn for you. Plus, if you get into trouble, it might rope me in. And I don't know how you feel about it, but I can use a few centuries of peace and quiet." He snaps his fan out again to cool himself.

I look down to the heads. I know what he is asking. He wants me to relinquish this gift. Turn back into a mortal. I was pondering over that recently. Vilkas's words were haunting me. In the aftermath of the Stormcloak rebellion I realized my sins. I knew I was influenced by the Daedra too much. I wouldn't go to Sovngarde if I were to die.

However, I would be trading this power. This gift, for mortality again. I would have a lessened lifespan and live as any mortal. Not as special. Not as powerful. But I would live a life of peace. Vilkas moves ahead of me, his own decision made. He doesn't have to ask for permission. I already gave it to him.

"So, you want in?" Clavicus asks. I expect a mocking smile from him but when I look over, I only see an expression close to compassion. "I know it's a lot to give up."

"I need to think." I say in a strangled voice. What would Kodlak want for me? He wanted me to lead the Companions, but there's no reason I couldn't do that after I change back over. I just wouldn't have fur.

And I'd have a chance at Sovngarde. Some nights I think back on my time there. I still wanted to walk those halls that I never got to.

"I'd say time's ticking, but it's really not. I only have a bunt cake in the oven I have to get back to." Clavicus adds.

His sarcasm propels me. I walk over to the pedestal of flame. Vilkas was just holding the hagraven head over his. I nod to him, "Do it. You go first. My wolf will be harder to kill."

Vilkas drops it. The head goes up in flames and he falls to the ground, writhing as the spectral beast is parted from him. I move to grab the other head by the hair and stand off to the side as Vilkas fights the beast. It is just as powerful and strong as he is. But he is a worthy opponent. I watch as he fights, both the beast and the man are worthy opponents. Vilkas is just as graceful, just as calculated in his movements. They are like a mirror of each other. But the wolf has a weakness and I am just watching Vilkas exploit it.

"Just tell me, you're sure." The voice sounds next to me. I tear my eyes away from the fizzling fight and look up to Hircine. His white skull mask holds shadows with the blazing light before us. His eyes are bright, but they're not full of hatred like I expected.

"I am. I know what it means to stay this way. I know who will be coming for me." I tell him.

"It doesn't have to be that way. I can give you more powers to defeat your enemies." Hircine says in a firm voice. I don't doubt his promise is true.

Vilkas stands from his wolf, the form was just fading. He looks to me.

I think back on my powers. I will miss them. But I know what they mean too. I still shudder at what I did that day I entered the Castle. I killed so many people with that mind control alone. No one, not even me, should wield such a power.

I think he will stop me. All he has to do is hold up a hand or throw me to the wall, but Hircine just stands by as I walk over to the flames.

"Careful. My wolf with be stubborn. She's like me." I grin at Vilkas and drop the head.

It goes up in a puff of flames. I feel the break. I fall to the ground as I'm separated from myself. I scream with it. Not only is the wolf untangling herself from me, so are these gifts. The mind reading, control, detecting life, turning spectral, and calling the ice wolves. It's gone.

I hear her heavy breathing. It's not from exertion but from rage. I roll quickly as she snaps at me. The great White Wolf stands before me, as a powerful adversary. Her heated gaze questions why I did this. If I really want it. I suppose I still have a chance to bring her back into me. But I don't want to. I lunge with Grimsever at the ready.

It was a hard-fought battle. There were moments when I stabbed her, and I would hear her cries of pain, it was like I was stabbing myself. I longed to help her. But I had to remind myself what she was: a gift from a Daedra.

Growing up I was always told stories about them as tricksters. Deceivers and liars who would do whatever they could for your soul. I guess I did get lulled into complacency when I was fighting the Night Mother. I knew they were helping us and never took into account when they would turn against us.

But Clavicus Vile's deal is now a silver lining. Without it, I wouldn't have this chance to rid myself of this evil. I swung Grimsever again and nicked the powerful beast in the chest. She roars, so loud and full of rage as she towers over me. I am scared. It's terrifying to see such a creature looming over you, her fangs and sharp talons are nothing compared to her mass. She is easily twice my height and weight. All I can think is this was what all my enemies saw when I descended on them.

Then, I twisted the sword. Bringing her the killing blow. Her eyes locked with mine and had to stifle a gasp when I see them for once. I was too distracted by her mass, her muscular form that could tear me in two if she got a good enough hold. Now, I see her eyes, they're hard, bright with rage. The orange flames in the iris are nothing compared to the pupil, it moves like a cat's does. Nothing I've seen on any other werewolf. They are terrifying. This is a sign the beast is not natural. It should not be in this world.

"I'm sorry." I whisper. Then I push the blade in further.

Vilkas wanted to aid me but Clavicus Vile only told him that interfering would make it harder to separate myself. When she finally faded from view, I felt that hole opening up in me. But it wasn't so bad. It was periodical longing. I could still function. It wasn't as if I had lost something so precious.

Vilkas walked away with me. I truly thought I would regret it. I was scared I would. But I only felt peace. I knew I made the right decision. On the way out I see Clavicus Vile up ahead. He winks at me. "Good choice. Sounds like the deal is complete. Call on me if you ever need another." He passes me some sort of note, like a small card with his name on it.

"However do I…" I trail off when I see he's gone.

"Probably call his name in the wind." Vilkas jokes next to me.

"But you have to be eating truffles and boasting an ornamental fan."

"Only the fanciest." He laughs.

"Might need a robe or two." I muse. But once we break out into the night air, Vilkas pulls me in for a searing kiss. I fall into it with him. Minor regret has turned into elation. In a week we will be married. Once I get home to Whiterun, I will be a new woman. We will lead the Companions the best we can, with a promising future ahead of us.

A week later seemed to be too soon. As Aela was braiding my blonde hair, I wondered if I should have pushed it a few months out. "Is everything truly ready?" I ask her.

She seems sheepish. "Yes. Vilkas told us the week before he asked your hand in marriage. Farkas and I had a week to prepare. So, we might have hunted you down if you said no. It was hard to get the streamers right."

I laugh at her joke. "I'm happy I didn't disappoint."

The ceremony was beautiful. At first, we were going to have it under the Gildergreen in the center of town. But I didn't feel like looking to Dragonsreach just yet. I still had those painful memories of Jarl Balgruuf's departure. I would have rather looked to the mountains. So, our ceremony was held behind Jorrvaskr. With the beautiful peaks as the centerpiece.

Soft green and pink streamers ran the way down the aisle. I followed the path laid out for me by the white walkway. Chairs sat on either side with friends, old and new. I was happy to see Eve, Bryjolf, Gabriel, and Delvin had made it. I wasn't sure if they would.

My dress was beautiful if not simple. Plain white with a trimmed waist and a long skirt covered in white flowers. Not too many, but enough of a touch that it was delicate and pretty. Aerin's arm was in mine. We both laugh as I stumble along in those impossibly high heels. I told Aela not to get the towering ones, but she must have gotten them the week before the engagement. "You still look good." Aerin tells me.

I smile up at him, taken away from my destination momentarily. "You do too, handsome, might find someone you like tonight."

He just blushes and continues to aid me down the aisle. When some of the flowers connected to the streamers passes us, I have a full and unhindered view of Vilkas. He takes my breath away. I can't stop staring at him. His armor is fit for a king, his hair swept back in a handsome way, but it was the way he watched me. He looks just as emotional as I am.

We said our vows. Exchanged our rings. And when the time came to kiss him, I fell into his embrace. Cheers sounded around me. I think Farkas's was the loudest. He was right next to his brother as his best man, so I thought that had a lot to do with it. But I realize it could just be he is a very loud person.

After the ceremony, the celebration began. Tables and chairs were moved to stay outside and enjoy the revelry. Food, cake, and drinks were here for everyone, and I noticed a few people took some to heart a little too much.

I laughed it away though. After Vilkas and my first dance was complete, it was a sweet thing, soft and slow, I took off my death trap of shoes and was taken onto the dance floor by Aerin. We danced as goofy as we could. We taught it to ourselves a few years back when we grew bored in Riften. There wasn't much to do, and I wasn't cracking into the Thieves Guild like I wanted to, so we learned this dance.

He laughs again and spins me around. "Not so coordinated after the wolf blood is gone!" He yells over the music.

I laugh but soon I ask him. "Are you still sad about it?"

He shrugs, and continues to dance, in such an odd, jerking way. "A little. I'm trying to think of other ways to make you immortal though."

I continue the dance before taking a break for some water. I was a little sore about that. Aerin was devastated when he learned what we did. I wanted to put the matter all on Clavicus Vile, tell him that if I didn't do it, I would have an eternity stuck with the Prince of Deals himself. But I couldn't bear to lie anymore.

He didn't take it well. Farkas was somber as well, but Aela broke their spell by saying something foolish. She mentioned that there might be a way to make us immortal again. I had brushed it off. As far as I knew, you could be a werewolf or a vampire. And I would not wish for the latter. But this crazy obsession kept Aerin going. I would rather see him determined than depressed.

Eventually, I'll have to cut it and tell him this: we need to enjoy our time together. No matter how long or short. Immortals could die after all. But tonight, I didn't want to do that. I wanted to enjoy life.

"Mmm, good choice on cake. Who knew coconut and chocolate would make a good mix?" Eve sits down next to me. She has a long purple gown on that suits her. I had to do a double take the first time I saw her here. I've never seen her outside of the Thieves Guild or Nightingale armor.

"I'd say thank you, but Aela chose it for us." I take another sip of water.

"Well, she has good taste." Eve takes another bite, "What's got you so pensive?"

My lips thin, I was happy talking to this woman because she was so oblivious. There was no way she could tell my mood unless it was very obvious. "I had a debt to pay with Clavicus Vile. It was my immortality. I gave up the wolf."

I see she's about to choke on her cake. I ready myself to perform that maneuver Farkas showed me. You get behind someone and push as much as you can into their stomach to get the food up. Actually, I am just rising when she coughs out a laugh.

"Sorry, caught me off guard. I don't know if I heard you right…you're not the White Wolf anymore?"

"No. I prefer it though. The beast blood doesn't call me. I don't have to change. I don't have to kill anyone."

She rests a hand on my shoulder, sensing my distress. "You did what you had to do. I mean, we were in a war. There will be casualties."

Tears glimmer in my eyes, "But I could have been better. There were a lot of Imperials that didn't need to lose their lives."

She just squeezes my shoulder and nods to the crowd. "Might be some people to talk about all this in there." I follow her gaze and see Ulfric and Galmar, uncomfortable and off to the side. I smile when I see them. I had no idea they would be here. Vilkas must have invited them.

"I'll go see them. Thank you, Eve, I mean it. I hope we can meet more and become better friends." I tell her.

She brings me into a hug. "No problem. Thank you for all you did in Riften when I was first there. I needed someone in those days."

Those memories come back in searing clarity. Of her begging in the marketplace. She looked so helpless. "You're stronger than I thought you were." I tell her honestly.

She just grins as she pulls away, "Well hey, look so are you!"

We made more pleasantries and planned to see each other in the next month. I was only an acquaintance with her for so long, it was time I became more of a friend. I soon left her and followed my heart to the other side of the room.

"How is the Stormcloak conquest?" I ask the two men.

Galmar pulls me into a strong hug, his breath littered with whiskey. "Good, wolf! Good job with this wedding. I wasn't expecting such fanfare, but you wolves sure bring it out."

"Congratulations, Mjoll." Ulfric nods. I know he'd hug me as well but he had a plate of cake in one hand a glass of whiskey in the other. "Come to Solitude soon, before summer, I have a few gifts I want to give you for your service."

I'm sure it will be swords and armor. But I'll take them gratefully. "Thank you." I fall into silence.

Galmar is bopping and swaying with the up-tempo music, but Ulfric picks up on my mood. "What troubles you?"

"The nightmares. Those I killed. Did they all deserve it?" I ask him. Galmar, sensing the tone change, grabs the cake from Ulfric and begins to eat ravenously.

"Deserve it? Probably not. But it was the price they paid for siding with the Empire." Ulfric glances over me. His face is world weary. Broken. But he seems to be used to it. He was victorious and unlike Galmar, he wasn't gloating. He felt the heavy price of war as much as me.

"How do you move on from it?" I ask.

"Such heavy topic for a girl in a wedding dress." Galmar mentions. Ulfric waves him off. The man goes to get more cake. I have to forgive him, he is severely intoxicated and had no idea what he was truly saying.

"Don't worry about him. I'll give him a stern word when we leave." Ulfric begins. I wish to tell him I took no offense, but he continues, "As for the price we, they, paid. There is no leaving that burden. The memories are what you carry with you. You will be wearier. Maybe a little less trusting. But you have to remember why we did it in the first place. That has to override everything."

I think back on my time with them. We needed the Night Mother gone and that was the way to do it. "I guess so." My voice is strangled. Tears are near the surface.

Ulfric gives me a sharp look, "I don't want to make a bride cry on her wedding day. We can talk about this at a later time. Just know they didn't die in vain. It was their time." He smiles softly, "When you took up the mantle, at the Companions, did you expect this to be the price?"

I shake my head, willing the tears back. If I were to speak, they might come pouring out. "It's what a warrior is." He says, "It's not glamorous, it's not pretty, not all the time. But we do this so those people." He nods to the crowd of guests, those immortal and not, those from far away and close by, dancing in the center of the courtyard. "We do it, so they don't have to bear that burden."

I watch them. There are children intermingling with the adults, little girls and boys laughing with food on their faces. I see my friends, Aerin, Farkas, and Aela joking with Gabriel. Eve dancing slowly with Brynjolf. Near the crowd I see another face.

"Thank you." I tell Ulfric. "I'll remember that." I wipe at a stray tear before he sees. He hugs me with one arm and gives me another reminder of the gifts awaiting me in Solitude.

I wasn't sure if I was ready for this conversation. But after the one I had with Ulfric, I thought now was the best time. Adrianne Avenicci is cleaned up from her blacksmith job. She stands in a pretty and modest dress. I'm sure it was a little dusty from underuse. I never see her or her husband at events such as these. I'm grateful they're here.

I made my amends with Ulfberth War-Bear a month or so ago. He was manning the desk and couldn't run away when I came in with a random short sword I found in Jorrvaskr. It did need to be sharpened. It wasn't something that had to be done that instant, not like anyone was using it. But I had to try and apologize.

He heard me out. He accepted, he knew the weight of what we had been dealing with. But when I asked about my old friend Adrianne, he said she was out. She was vacant whenever I came in the following three times. Based on how she showed her face tonight, she might be willing to accept the olive branch I held.

Her eyes find mine. They are fierce and still angry. She has every right to be. Her husband whispers something to her. She says something back. Without my wolf hearing, I can't tell exactly what they are saying. He nods to me, "Lovely ceremony and dress, congratulations."

"Thank you, it is much appreciated." I tell him. He wanders off back to the food bar. Now I am left with my old friend.

I don't know where to start. "I can't imagine…" I halt. "I can only imagine what you dealt with when the Stormcloaks came through."

Adrianne watches the crowd with a look of boredom she shrugs and takes another bite of her finger food Aela was smart enough to get. "Honestly, not much has changed. I do less business than I used to being an Imperial. The Stormcloaks don't like buying from anyone that isn't a Nord. If I wasn't married to Ulberth, I'd be out of business." She says, then she glances down my dress, "Lovely choice."

"Thank you." I say, shocked by her neutral tone. She was still talking like she used to, extending the conversation and adding all the details she can remember.

She smiles at me. "Ulberth told me everything. He said you were taken by the Stormcloaks and forced to fight."

I'm shocked again into silence. "Yes. But I went willingly in the end."

"To destroy the Night Mother." She finishes. "I will say, I didn't like seeing this city torn up and the racist attitudes the Nords boast isn't favorable. But things aren't that different. I was just scared the day I saw you. I didn't know why you were there or who might break into our business."

"I'm sorry." I say again.

She laughs it off. "I accept. I don't want you looking so distressed on what's supposed to be the happiest day of your life." She looks over my shoulder. "I see your groom is looking for you, go. We can get food at a later day. Talk shop and other things."

I smile to her gratefully, knowing now might not be the time for a hug but she pulls me into one anyways. Soon after, I find Vilkas. We break into another dance together. I laugh when almost loses his balance.

"By Talos, I forgot how good my balance was with the wolf."

"You can work on it." I laugh as he pulls me into a circle.

"I'll try. We should practice." He watches me with those beautiful eyes. As pretty as the day I first saw them.

"How does one practice such a thing?" I joke.

"We'll find out." The music moves to another slow song. He leans down, I welcome his lips, consumed in the kiss.

The rest of the night is perfection. This is the ending I wanted, the ending I had hoped for but wasn't sure if I would get it. Like Ulfric said, there was a price to pay for what we did. But I know with Vilkas at my side, who was going through the same emotions, we would make it out together.

I spy my friends in the crowd, dancing and laughing. I know I did good by them and will continue to do so. I will do good by Kodlak. I will run the Companions as well as he did. I'm sure newcomers will find it odd I am not in the form of a wolf. But it won't matter. I was also toying with the idea of accepting more mortals into the fold. We could always bring in new friends. Noble fighters.

But that was not a worry for tonight. I was swept up in the music, with friends by my side and my husband in my arms. It was dream I had long ago in Riften, this kind of celebration. But I never knew it would be true. All I know is I will live it to the fullest, now free and happy as I've ever been.

Cicero's Journal Entry

25th of Morning Star, 4E 203

They're gone. They left days ago and don't look like they'll be coming back anytime soon. Now is the perfect time. Cicero creeped through the manor, looking into any and all doors, cupboards, dressers, everything. There's a lot of value here but Cicero isn't a filthy thief. He at least has some dignity.

But Mother, oh, Mother, I found a spot. Beneath the floorboards. I can just separate them and shove your coffin down there. Leader would be none the wiser and Cicero could watch from afar. It's perfect. As it was meant to be.