SONIC UNIVERSITY

by joshy suigtin

SONIC UNIVERSITY Contains many favorite characters like our buddies, Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, and a few other weird Sonic characters nobody else knows. They are all off to college, Sonic University, which is much more stressful, suspenseful, cashless, and love-packed challenge than their previous schools ever were! Will Sonic and friends make it through college, or will they die? :(

7. Lunch Time

Sonic University

Chapter 7

Lunch Time

"You did what!?" Said Espio. "What's your body count up to now, Sonic?"

"Ha! I've sexed 5 different people now! My Mom, sister, teacher, and friend's girl friend/princess!" Sonic boasted. Everyone stared at Sonic, and they began to clap. Amy didn't count because Sonic did not cum inside her but everyone did know that Sonic had is first sex on his 16th birthday with someone he won't say. But he told everyone that it wasn't Amy, she was older than him, it was someone he hasn't seen since, and it wasn't his dad. Sonic wanted to change the topic, he didn't want word to spread about Mrs. Arithmetic. "So, uh, Espio. What did you get for Christmas?" Sonic asked.

"Oh! My Christmas was so rad, Sonic! I got a slip n slide!" Said Espio. "I went outside to try it out and all the water froze to ice, which made the slide pop! It was a piece of shit." Said Espio. He seemed proud of destroying his gift, kind of like when mommy crashes her car daddy just finished paying off and then goes home and says she didn't even like it.

Now people at the table were excited to share about their Christasm. At Sonic's table Tails and Knuckles sat on both sides of him. Espio sat next to Knuckles while cracking boob jokes, and Shadow sat across from Sonic. Shadow was really edgy and scary most of the time. Knuckles likes to cause trouble because it is fun, but Shadow has a different body count of how many people he has killed. Silver sat next to Shadow, Silver could afford a $500.00 parking pass to Sonic University. His parents give him a lot of money because they are rich and live in a big house, so he wore a golf shirt and khaki shorts to school everyday. He was wearing a new white golf shirt today. Nobody else at the table could afford clothes, luckily they can suck their genitals into their bodies out of sight. Everyone else lived in medium sized houses, except Shadow because he killed his parents and his house. He lived in his motorcycle because he was bad. "Hey, Tails!" Said Espio. "What did you get for Christmas?"

Tails began to sweat. This was a hard question for him. "Um… Um… Nothing!" He screamed.

"Are you okay, dude?" Said Knuckles. "Everyone gets a fucking Christmas, it's the law!"

Tails knew he had to tell the truth. "I'm... Jewish…" Said Tails. Everyone around him was quiet. Tails had never told anybody he was a Jewish. Finally, Shadow broke the silence with his dark and edgy voice.

"Why?" He said. Tails began to shake. He did not know why he was Jewish, but he knew his parents were Jewish.

"U-u-u-u-u-uh-uh-uh-uu-u-uu-u-aa-a-a-a-a-a-aah-ah!" Stuttered Tails. Sonic could sense the awkwardness and brought up a new topic, but the topic wasn't really new.

"Hey! Look at the bright side guys! I've gone to sex with 5 different people, and nobody called the police yet!" Sonic yelled so everyone in the tri-state area could hear.

"Oh my fucking God, Sonic! WE KNOW!" Knuckles yelled. His temper can flare a lot. He is like a loose cannon during World War 2. Knuckles then smashed his spiky hand on the top of Sonic's head. Sonic's cut that he got from slipping on black ice when walking to the bus stop to go to Sonic University because it was his first day back from winter break burst open again like a volcano with red blood shooting out of it.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! SHIT!" Screamed Sonic. Knuckles was shocked too.

"Fuck! Shit I didn't mean it!" Knuckles cired.

Amy saw Sonic in trouble and went over to help. "Here, Sonic! I can help!" She said as she reached into her purse. Then she stuck a teenage girl blood diaper pad on the top of Sonic's head. The blood geyser stopped.

"Whoa! Thanks, Amy!" Said Sonic. Other kids around him began to laugh. They were calling his head a woman or a head vagina. "No! It's not what you think!" Cried Sonic. "FUCK!" He yelled and he slammed his head on the table. This caused his teenage girl blood diaper pad to fly off and the blood geiser shot right onto Silver's new white golf shirt.

"NO! SHIT! DAMN YOU SONIC!" Silver cried in his rich person accent. Somebody called 911 because an ambulance drove right into the lunch room where everyone ate lunch at lunch time to pick Sonic up.

"wHOA!" Sonic yelled as the paramedics tossed Sonic into the back of the ambulance with blood still spraying like a sprinkler with breast cancer. Then they drove off throughout the other side of the lunch room where everybody ate lunch at lunch time. The medical monster truck ran over tables, lunchables, and even a few people that nobody cared about, like Charmy Bee because he was a gay fag tard.

With Sonic gone, Tails began to think. "Man, I wish I could have a chance to sex someone!" He thought. Being the nerd ass Tails was, he came up with an idea. "I KNOW! I'll make a device that will allow me to have wet dreams with whoever I want!" Tails thought to himself. He couldn't wait to get to work!