Alyssa laid on the couch in Owen and Teddys living room, rewatching an old Harry Potter movie.
"Lyss," Owen asked.
"Just tired I'm okay," Alyssa forced a smile.
"Your not," Owen said, "your mom is going to stay late at the hospital with Faroke. Auntie Teddy is in surgery. Leo and Allison are sleeping over with grandma. I thought we could do dinner and I have your last letter your mom wrote. Teddy made cookies today before she went to work. So cookies and cocoa?"
"Yes," Alyssa said.
"Dinner ideas," Owen asked.
"Not greasy it's making me feel sick," Alyssa said, "I don't want to eat much. I eat a few bites and I'm stuffed. There's not room for food right now."
"Kiddo you need to eat something," Owen said, "what if I bbqed some chicken and veggies?"
"That sounds good," Alyssa agreed.
"Has anyone checked your blood pressure today," Owen asked.
"Auntie Teddy did before she left," Alyssa said, "it was still high."
"Can I check," Owen asked, "she did it when you just got back from the hospital. You've laid down and watched your movie."
"Do I have to move," Alyssa asked.
"Nope," Owen replied, "I'll bring it to you."
"Okay," Alyssa agreed.
Owen checked her blood pressure and posted it to the group chat with Megan and Teddy, they weren't letting Alyssa know they were tracking as closely as they were. She knew they were watching but not writing it down.
"It's better," Owen said, "Teddy told me about the earlier one. It's coming down from this morning. If your not hungry yet do you want to go for a walk with me?"
"Sure," Alyssa agreed, getting up off the couch slowly.
"You okay there," Owen asked.
"Yep," Alyssa replied, "slow and huge."
"Listen to your body," Owen said.
"Dr Deluca keeps threatening me with a c-section," Alyssa replied, "I really don't want one. I don't want surgery."
"Has she told you why," Owen asked.
"One of the girls is still breech and she's worried that Celeste won't turn," Alyssa said.
"Celeste," Owen asked, "you have names?"
"Don't tell anyone I told you," Alyssa said, "Alexandra Megan and Celeste Theodora."
"Megan and Theodora," Owen said, "your mom and Teddy?"
"Yes," Alyssa said.
"I like both names," Owen said, "last name?"
"Hunt - Wolff," Alyssa said.
"Lets just go around the block," Owen said, "Teddy was told that walking would help get Allison in the right position, maybe it would help Celeste turn."
"Alyssa is a c-section the worst possibility," Owen asked.
"No," Alyssa agreed, "but I don't want major surgery. Matt works for his dad. Jack won't give him more than a few days off when I have the girls. I don't want to do the recovery alone with no help."
"Stay here," Owen said, "Lyss you're too high risk to travel. Carina Deluca has an impeccable record in her whole career she's only lost one mother and that wasn't even really an OB thing. That was because the baby grew outside the uterus and attached to the mom's liver and the placenta destroyed the liver. Carina is the best we have. Her c-section rates are really really low, if she's recommending it she sees it as an unavoidable medical necessity for you or your girls."
"I've read about doctors doing it to make it easy for them," Alyssa said.
"No," Owen said, "we had this conversation with her when Allison was born and that's one reason Teddy chose her. Alyssa I think you should listen to Carina. Have it here, have Carina do it then bring the girls home to our house while you do the first couple weeks of recovery. Teddy and I can help you. The girls will get to know Opa and Oma right away. Grandma will help. Your mom."
"I don't know about mom," Alyssa said, "if Faroke gets worse or doesn't make it we'll lose her again. Uncle Owen I can't lose mom again."
"I'm worried about the same thing," Owen said.
"We can't lose her again," Alyssa said, "I want mom to stay but if we lose Faroke she won't be able to take it."
"I'm worried about the same thing," Owen said, "is this what's really stressing you out?"
"Ya," Alyssa said, "I don't want to lose her, I was just starting to get her back. We finally had some real common ground as adults. I want to really know her and I'm scared we won't be able to."
"I'll talk to her," Owen said, "but you need to tell her two. Your mom needs to hear how much you love and need her."
"I don't know how," Alyssa said, "I'm just scared all the time."
"What's scaring you," Owen asked.
"That we'll lose Faroke or he won't come out of this healthy, that we'll lose mom, that something will be wrong with one of my girls," Alyssa whined, "that Matt will leave me. He's been really distant and I know I chose to be here with my family but my brother could easily die. He almost did. I know what a code is I know half an hour is a long one. I heard you and auntie Teddy. I might not be a doctor but I was raised around medicine I understand it. I know what the medications are and what different procedures are. Dr Deluca is considering giving me an infusion of a medication to speed up the girls lung development."
"An infusion is easy," Owen said.
"I know," Alyssa replied, 'IV in my arm I get to read or nap."
"You should hear her out and discuss it with Matt,' Owen replied, "with your blood pressure the way it is, the stress your under and twins you could easily have the girls early."
"But I can't alone," Alyssa said.
"I said early not alone," Owen replied, 'if Matt isn't here you'll pick. Me, Teddy, Megan, Grandma. Someone will be with you and the girls. They will be loved and know they are very loved."
"If something happens to me and Matt will you look after my girls," Alyssa asked.
"Of course Lyss," Owen said, "but why me?"
"Because you raised me," Alyssa replied, "you've been there more than anyone else in my life. Seattle is close to Matt's family so they can visit like we did with the Jarretts and the girls can know the Jarrett side. But you'll teach them the same things you taught me, to love fully, loyalty, respect, to do the right thing even when it is the hardest choice. To respect and love themselves. That they have voices and can be anything and do anything they want. "
"Teddy and I will," Owen said, "you should talk to her but she will say yes."
"If anything happens to mom," Alyssa worried, "I won't be able to get her back a second time. My girls won't have their grandma. And at one point I was okay with the idea of them not knowing their grandma because we thought mom was gone but now she's here but she's fading away."
"I'm worried about her two," Owen said, "I worry what will happen to her if the worst does happen."
"How can we stop it," Alyssa asked.
"We hope," Owen said, 'and we surround her with love."
"She said she doesn't want to live if she loses him," Alyssa told Owen, "that she's already had too much pain in this life. She doesn't want to go through another one."
"When," Owen asked.
"A few days ago before I started getting really dizzy and needing to be watched," Alyssa replied, "and I know at least you and auntie Teddy are watching me you're not that subtle and you always shared vitals when I was sick."
"We are sharing it,' Owen agreed, 'because we love you. Lyss thank you for telling me about what your mom said. I think that's why your blood pressure and anxiety suddenly spiked because you were good until then."
"Why can't she stay for me and my girls," Alyssa asked, "I need her two."
"I don't know if she meant it," Owen said, "years ago when your mom was really upset or stressed she would say that she didn't want to do things or live anymore. It was her way of letting off the stress and it used to scare the hell out of me. I called our mom a few times about it. One time I carried the two of you to my car and brought her to the hospital I was so worried about how she was talking. Lyss you need to tell her your worried about her and love her."
"I don't want to make it worse," Alyssa said, "she needs to worry about Faroke not me. I can figure my stuff and my kids out. And where's Nathan? He's legally Faroke's dad and he's not here."
"I've spoken to him," Owen said, "he knows and is trying to come home but he's in the middle of a contract that has him with the army in the middle east. Lyss it might not be that easy to get him here."
"His son might be dying," Alyssa said, "Faroke is dying. I heard Auntie Teddy and Dr Ndugu talking in the hall. They're talking about worst case scenario and last resorts. He's dying isn't he?"
"It's a possibility," Owen agreed, "but we will do everything in our power to stop it first."
"We'll lose mom," Alyssa said.
"She'll go dark," Owen said, "she'll go really dark and for a long time but she will come out of it. And it'll be you that pulls her out of it."
"How," Alyssa asked.
"By being you," Owen said, "and I think Alexandra and Celeste will have a lot to do with it. Lyss she won't be able to resist your babies. Right now we're all clinging to that as our little bit of hope here. Your girls are our hope that something good is coming. You need to take care of yourself and them so they can be as healthy as possible."
"I'm scared," Alyssa said.
"I know," Owen said, "I was when your mom brought you home, when you came to live with me. It's okay to be scared, it means you have something to lose but you also gave everything to gain. You will be a wonderful mom I've seen you with Leo and Allison. You're ready Lyss."
"Can we keep walking," Alyssa asked, "I'm feeling calmer."
"We will keep walking then," Owen said, "do you want to walk over to the soup place we're already half way?"
"The soup place sounds good," Alyssa agreed.
"Let's go get soup then," Owen smiled, Alyssa was relaxing maybe she just needed to talk to him and have time just them which they hadn't had since she had come down to support Megan and Faroke.
"Will they be okay," Alyssa asked.
"I hope so," Owen replied, "but Lyss I'm proud of how you've stepped up to support and love everyone."
"We're family," Alyssa said, "we stick together and more so when things are hard. You taught me that."
"We do," Owen smiled.