All right, this chapter is also quite long, but we'll call it the fangirl Q & A chapter. This is a somewhat loose interpretation of Ginny, however our girl needs someone in her corner and the boys are still a little weird about this whole thing. And you lot do love asking questions about her opinions on Sev. Voila! With a bit of magical lore for plot. Apologies for the lack of Severus this chapter, but he's...a bit occupied. Stick with us through this though, and next update you will get quite a... treat 😉 Let us know what you think.

Cover art by OpalChalice - Enjoy!

~ Kristina & Abby

The Ties That Bind

"No cord or cable can draw so forcibly, or bind so fast, as love can do with a single thread." - Robert Burton

CHAPTER IV: The Spirit of Inquiry

"It is not easy to find something that will intrigue and bind your interest and enthusiasm. This you must seek for yourself." - Walter Annenberg

~•~

Wednesday, 26th November, 2003 - Night

Still muttering rational platitudes to herself like a proper lunatic going through a minor existential crisis as she walked, Hermione Granger made it to her flat on muscle memory alone since Merlin knew she hadn't been paying an ounce of attention to where she was going. She unlocked the door and the series of locking charms she had in place, which had diminished in number in recent years, only to be greeted by the predictably judgemental stare of her large orange cat, spread across her sofa with clear displeasure at the delay in his dinner.

"Oh, don't you start, Crooks, I'm about to get plenty of that," she sighed, pausing to scratch his ears on her way to fill up his tragically empty bowl.

She would inevitably be leaving again - much to his continued displeasure, she was sure. Having told Ginny and Harry that she'd stop by later on to give them an update, she supposed she had to do so. It would be abnormal if she suddenly fell into radio silence. Though as one of the few wizarding married couples she knew well - and whose nuptials she had bore witness to herself, she did have a few very pointed questions about the process. Though she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to pose them to Harry, thinking about it... Asking him if he was hit by a random wave of - what, arousal? - from the situation sounded horribly… awkward. Well, she could do, clinically, but only if she could manage to intimidate him into secrecy from Ronald.

That situation was going to be… delicate already, as it sat.

She paused on her way to the kitchen, however, as her feline's nose twitched from her touch as though startled by his own owner's scent momentarily, and Hermione's concern only grew. This night was getting stranger by the moment.

As motherhood was still novel, and frankly still somewhat foreign to her, Ginny Potter was pleased to conjure an escape from the household solo, for once in a great while. She had very cleverly, she thought, decided that instead of waiting round hers with a whining baby and the potential to feel like she should be tidying, Ginny instead flooed to Hermione's flat to wait for her report in person, there. Harry could be caught up later, and definitely could do with some one-on-one time with their latest addition, just as she could readily do with some alone time before her gossip sesh with her best of friends. Let alone a bloody nap, perhaps.

And so, it was only when she heard the keys jingling in the lock that Ginny awoke with a slight start and lay in wait to see whether Hermione would notice her immediate presence. Shame she didn't have the invisibility cloak on her; then she could really give her mate a proper spook.

However, as it could very easily be predicted, Ginny's eagerness to hear what the bloody hell had happened at the meeting, married to her inability to stifle a yawn that was surely in the making, she abruptly decided to make her presence known. Once she saw the hallway light flicker on and illuminate the figure of a very disgruntled and displeased Crooks meeting his owner's eyes, Ginny finally popped up to say, "Boo!"

Hermione jumped, taken out of her daze by the unexpected voice coming from the couch she had just bloody walked past. Honestly, how oblivious was she at the moment that she missed the distinctively Weasley shade of red hair on her throw pillows?

"Fuck! You scared me!" she cursed distractedly, as she turned to give Ginny an accusatory glare before continuing her pace towards the kitchen.

"Thought I was supposed to floo over there?"

"Sorry for popping in when you weren't home, but the bloody kid was being an arse and if I left when I did, Harry didn't have a proper reason not to - oh, I don't know - be a father," Ginny explained casually though with a tinge of marital resentment that often reared its head up as an unwanted asset when new kin were introduced into a young, growing family.

She leant her head against the back of the couch with an exacerbated sigh and another stifled yawn.

"I tried to find Crooks' food, but alas, apparently I napped instead… Plus, I wanted a night off. So, if you've any qualms about it all, do take it up with my solicitor?" she offered a playful grin as she watched her friend make her way into the kitchen.

"Ah, well understandable," Hermione agreed absently as she stood on her tiptoes to reach the cupboard with the cat food, always located in one of the top-most lest Crookshanks decide to go searching, and went about filling his bowls, the familiar mundanity of it somewhat helping to normalise the speed of her racing thoughts.

"Little one's been grouchy?"

She had already said as much, of course, but it kept the topic of the conversation centered on Ginny and off of her evening for a moment as she tried to figure out exactly how she was going to explain it. Or what she was even going to explain.

"Understatement of the millennia," the redhead groaned with a rolling of her eyes as she rubbed them gingerly, refocusing her attention on her best mate.

"So…." Ginny pried rather obviously, as she rested her chin on her hands along the back of the couch.

"I might be bloody exhausted from maternal duties, but don't you think for a second that that has nixed my absolute need to know just what the bloody fuck happened at that meeting tonight. Spill everything. Now."

Hermione's lips twisted wryly at the blatant skip over the pleasantries, though she didn't exactly expect anything less. Ever since this whole concept had been introduced - gently, to her friends, there was a circulating aura of mystery around it that everyone had been trying to solve from the start. They all understood the intention of it, at least in part, but even if the logic was there, they still couldn't wrap their heads around the idea that she was actually going to go through with it. There were definitely bets being made behind her back, she knew that much. Though now that it was no longer an idea and very much a reality, she wasn't entirely certain how they'd all react.

"Well, we all met in Kingsley's office, of course. I came in with McGonagall, Snape was already there having some kind of discussion with Kingsley. All adequately uncomfortable to start with, naturally. We all knew absolutely nothing, and were forced to wait impatiently for the Wizengamot to send up instructions," she began blandly as she walked back into the living room, settling onto the opposite side of the couch and keeping her left hand decidedly out of sight for the moment.

"Right…." Ginny answered, nodding along and watching Hermione's person with the intensity typically afforded the following a particularly intense quidditch match.

"Okay, so, you all met… And, what was Snape like? I mean, you haven't seen him proper since the trial? How did he… I don't know, look? Behave? Did he seem horrified at what you'd offered to do for him…? Did he even acknowledge you?" She babbled her myriad of interrogating questions off as quickly as she had thought of them.

"He was… quiet. Stoic. I think he didn't know how to act in the situation so he just didn't look at me at all at first, no," she explained thoughtfully, trying to focus back on before everything had gone a bit mad.

"And he looked… fine, all things considered. A bit awkward, understandably, and slightly less clean shaven than usual since he couldn't use magic….."

That, she realised, was rather off topic, not to mention more of a ….palpable perception than a visible one. She quickly scooted past it.

"We were both equally as annoyed at the whole 'making-us-wait-to-assert-dominance' thing, so there was a sort of mutual agreement there…indirectly."

"Well, that fact certainly isn't astonishing when it comes to you two. Honestly, people think Harry to be the stubborn one, mostly, but I don't think he holds a candle when it comes to you, let alone Snape. Let me guess, even after everything, I bet he still showed up in one set - of however many he bloody well has - of his teaching robes, am I correct? Or am I correct?" Ginny tilted her head to the side and pursed her lips in an expression of pointed skepticism at the prospect of any other alternative and blinked twice as she waited expectantly for the assuredly positive answer.

Hermione couldn't help but snicker slightly at the predictability of that fact. Though it just made it all the more bizarre that she'd surely eventually have to see him wear something else. Outside of a couple 'emergencies' at Hogwarts where he'd shown up in a less rigorous ensemble, there wasn't a single thing she could really imagine him in.

"Down to the cravat, of course. Stubbornly attached to all those buttons, I think…"

Ginny chuckled as she softly threw her pupils north.

"Oy, talk about someone having a vulnerability avoidance issue. Surprised he hasn't transfigured into a bloody button for as much as he relies on them..."

The redhead's mouth split wide into a self-lauding grin of amusement at her own jest, before finding Hermione's eyes and locking in on them in a predatory fashion as the humour passed through her and she refocused her attention onto her next, most important topic of interrogation.

"So, enough with all this side talk, 'Mione, it's time we get to the main concern of tonight's meeting for you: did they, or did they not, accept your counter-negotiations? Emphasis, obviously, on the shagging one…?"

"Yes..." she drawled coyly, pursing her lips as she decided exactly how she would lead into the real crux of the situation.

"They agreed to delay the date of consummation by one year exactly - which by default delays any discussion of child-bearing, though that is a whole other issue I plan to poke at later. They are also giving us the entire year to settle into some kind of living situation. They essentially agreed to everything…."

There was, of course, a silent 'but' lingering in the air, and Hermione waited patiently for Ginny to latch onto it.

Noticing acutely - despite her weariness - Hermione's sudden drop off of conversation and the somewhat expectant look to her stare, Ginny abruptly sat upright and leant forwards as she became fully aware that the other witch was certainly prompting her to clamour on to the next course of events that occurred. And, whatever the fuck they had been, the Weasley internally concluded, they obviously had been both unexpected and extremely jolting for her.

"Hermione Jean Granger, what the bloody fuck happened after that?!" she asked with crystal clear steadiness.

The brunette sucked in a dramatic breath in preparation, and let her eyes wheel about their sockets once again in exasperation.

"Well, 'A' - we have to spend the entire year being their propaganda puppets. We have to make public appearances, organised by them through some 'media coordinator', and advocate for the stupid marriage law that no one fucking wants. No one outside of who we've already told can know it's not 'legitimate', so it's going to involve us having to pretend to be all in love and whatnot…." she began with decidedly dry disparagement, as though that were hardly unexpected even if it were infuriating.

"And 'B' - well, essentially the 'generousness' of their agreement was for today only. So… we had to get married right there and then, on the spot."

She finally revealed her left hand with a sardonic furl of her fingers, flashing her the gold band with a straight-faced raise of her brows. Though internally, obviously, she was prepping for the barrage of new inquiries that were about to be volleyed at her. If she knew Ginny there would be at least a dozen, and it was unlikely that she would breathe between half of them.

Ginny's forehead crinkled together in visceral surprise, her eyebrows shooting towards the heavens as her mouth dropped towards Hades and an audible gasp stumbled out of her mouth.

"Oh. My. Merlin. Piss off, you did not actually!? I… I… What?!" she squeezed her orbs shut and shook her head in an effort to relieve her dumbfoundedness, incapacity to speak, or the ability to form any coherent thoughts and/or questions.

"I'm literally at a loss for fucking words here, babes. I… How… Oh, fuck it," she tossed her hands up in the air and leant further even forwards to ask Hermione the first question that she could actually organise into a straight line.

"So… Snape was … actually…. willing to go through with it? Like, he didn't try to 'Avada' himself on the spot or fly away?"

"No Ginny, he did not decide to commit ritual suicide at the idea of marrying me," she corrected a bit blandly at the incidental insult, rolling her eyes fondly, though still muffling a chuckle.

"He was shocked of course - we all were, but after that faded, he was actually rather… gracious. I was surprised. On a few fronts, actually..."

"Oy, sorry, 'Mione, you know what I meant! Ugh, some uplifting best mate, I am. Please blame it on the baby?" she gave an exacerbated sigh of contempt for herself before imploring her friend with a look of both apology and favour.

"Well, that insult aside, I'm fairly impressed that he was so… okay with it, after the initial shock of it all. But, I suppose, it is Snape we're talking about here. It would hardly be a justifiable time to be too snarky or demeaning towards you after what you've done for him. But, despite everything he is… Sort of an 'anti-gentleman' type? I mean, what did he do? Get on one knee? Pull out your chair? Insist you use his first name - Ha! Like he'd ever do any of that. But really, I'm quite keen to hear about what he's like when he's not in 'professor' or 'headmaster' or 'war/spy-hero' mode. Go on…."

Hermione's expression somehow encapsulated the urge to laugh and cringe simultaneously. Honestly, she had no idea how to even put into words a believable description of how their interaction started, nor even if she should. It increasingly felt like a fever dream, and also somehow, the only sensible outcome.

"Decidedly did not do any of that, no. But I would disagree… he's certainly a gentleman. A very snide, Victorian gentleman who curses like a sailor and seems to flirt when he's nervous, but still a gentleman," she defended decidedly, with a slight shake of her head.

"Actually almost charming when he's not aiming his vitriol at you."

"Hold your bloody horses, Hermione!" Ginny exclaimed wildly as she held up a hand to demonstratively indicate that the entire world needed to pause because what had just come out of the witch's mouth was axis-halting, to be sure.

'He FLIRTED with you?!? How the bloody hell so?!"

The younger woman grabbed a nearby pillow and placed it in her lap before perching the weight of her elbows on it so as to allow easier access for her hands to cradle her voracious-looking face more steadily. She was nearly about to squeal from excitement. This was far better than any of her silly daytime soaps, that was for damn certain.

Hermione broke down and laughed, pinching the bridge of her nose. It did sound bloody ridiculous out of context, didn't it? Then again what part of the whole experience wouldn't to anyone else?

"I don't think it was deliberate at first, he just… seems to lead with his wit when he doesn't know what else to do. Though at a certain point when I clearly wasn't put off by it, I think he just stopped trying to catch himself. Who even knows? Though, I can now say I've seen him actively almost blush. He mostly did it to himself, at first, granted, but still ..."

"What did you say to make him blush, Woman?! I didn't even know the man's skin was capable of coming anywhere near such a consideration. What was said?!" Ginny reached over and swatted at the top Hermione's nearest hand in a feline-like way.

"You're so bloody reserved sometimes for lack of your own processing, it's infuriating. Process aloud, now, with me, hm?"

She huffed, trying to decide what she would actually use as an example without delving into a whole separate explanation. That whole contract debacle could definitely wait...

"Well, aside from apparently finding the concept of my saying the word 'cunt' far too amusing not to make jokes about taking - or giving - points, the words "good girl" definitely left his lips without his realising the connotation until after he had said them…."

If one observed Ginny's eyes to have bulged upon receiving the information that her friend and her - nay, their - ex-professor had been joined in marriage that very evening, they would surely have recanted that descriptive in lieu of a lesser adjective, as, now, with this newfound information of Severus' very interesting flirting Freudian slips, the redhead's eyes were actually bulging out of her skull in profound fascination.

"He said what? Oh, he's got to have some kind of kink, surely. I bet it was a turn-on, yea? Hearing him say that in that voice of his. Granted, he might be a right royal cock a majority of the time, but he does have the voice of a fucking god."

"Well, yeah, certainly not going to unhear that one .…" Hermione responded in an intentionally noncommittal tone, though deliberately choosing not to meet her friend's eyes for the understatement of the bloody century.

"But regardless, I think we both just kind of snarked our way through the situation so as to avoid being terribly anxious. Though it likely came off more flirtatious than not…. "

"Well, I suppose what the bloody hell else could you do; especially him. A slip-up like that, he must have wanted to hex himself in the balls. What was his recovery like? Did he even notice? Oy, sorry, I'm getting so swept up in the little details I'm also forgetting to question the bloody main event of the actual ceremony itself…. However, the details are also the juiciest parts, so do indulge me with them, too!"

Ginny teetered back and forth between the various bits of information she wanted Hermione to bestow upon her first. However, her mind was so ablaze with curiosities, she wanted to ask both the big and the small questions all at once. Hopefully, however, Hermione would come to her aid and enforce some sort of order and agenda with regards to navigating them.

Hermione was fidgeting with the gold band on her finger, which had begun to throb curiously again, barely acknowledging the series of questions at first but with an absent hum of agreement. It took her a moment to even completely separate them all out in her mind in order to respond. Though upon doing so, she remembered she had a few questions of her own that definitely needed to take precedence. Ginny's interrogation could wait.

"Oh, yes, he rushed to cover that up pretty quickly. And the marriage bit itself seemed normal-ish. But, um Ginny... as an aside, were there any kind of… effects during or after your wedding? From the magic during the ceremony, I mean?"

The ginger, fully noting that her friend was quite intently choosing not to properly answer her question - after all, they were there to talk about what had happened to Hermione that evening - frowned in thought at the query as she racked her brains to recall that special moment which felt like eons ago.

"…. Um, I'm not sure…. I mean, it went as any magic-folk would do… the handfasting, the exchanging of vows — usually written, though I assume yours were obviously from some ancient text…. — Uh, I don't know, when we kissed there was a bit of a flurry of electricity, but I think that was likely due to George and Ron being arses with their firecrackers behind me…. Why?"

Hermione's eyes lit up, her posture straightening slightly at the latter part of her description. Maybe that whole concept wasn't totally bizarre after all, but everyone else in the wizarding world just thought it was normal? Barely noticed it?

"That - did that uh... continue at all? Or was it, just like, an instant and it was done with? Was it at all centralised within your person or just like… behind you? "

"Well, like I've just said, I think it was mostly due to the nerves and the fucking arseholes that are my brothers. But it wasn't…." she licked her lips and glanced away meditatively, lost in memory for a moment.

"It wasn't anything mind-bending… not in a negative sense, of course. But, I'm assuming that you're pressing on that matter for a reason ….?" Ginny pried, her eyes focusing more sharply on the witch in front of her as she began to work out that Hermione certainly had, if not a few, a very specific incentive for asking this specific question, essentially, twice.

Chewing on her lower lip, Hermione ignored Ginny's indirect probing for the moment, looking off to her left in thought before delving immediately into yet another question. If she let her get back into asking her things she'd never get another word in edgewise. And getting to the bottom of said particular phenomenon was definitely a prominent concern.

"And it didn't… linger afterwards? Like, there wasn't any magical, or, any other kind of physical impact to speak of during, or after the kiss, or the binding in general?"

Ginny wrinkled her forehead for a minute before shrugging.

"I mean….save having a shag on our wedding night? Which, honestly wasn't grand, we were both far too pissed…. No, not really. Why?"

"Oh, not like that matters, you were shagging long before then anyway," Hermione dismissed with a heedless wave of her hand and sighed.

This was not very helpful, after all. Well, she supposed it was, but it was not giving her a rational explanation, which was the kind she had been hoping for - banking on, really.

"And I suppose you felt nothing at all during the actual binding bit either?"

"Like, literally?" Ginny asked, for clarification.

"No, nothing save the usual 'magic stuff' that comes with the territory, and the obvious touch of the binds themselves. But the magical part was just a small bit of heat, and then a sudden tightening sensation before the very last vow. As if the bonds were tying you together for a moment - symbolic of the marriage, blah blah blah. But nothing I wasn't expecting from other weddings. Nothing… shattering," she laughed at the notion.

The event itself, whilst very sweet and romantic, again, wasn't very much of a big deal, to be honest. But, then again, what could begin to feel even remotely momentous after having served in a bloody war prior? Indeed, even the mystique of love and a wedding couldn't fully mollify the hangover that was the second wizarding world war. Still, it had been a lovely day. And one that Ginny felt quite, quite blessed to have had.

"Well fuck me, that's concerning," Hermione cursed bluntly after a moment of consideration.

She let out a huff of frustration, letting her head fall against the rear of the couch before closing her eyes, though she could still feel Ginny's probing attention on her - waiting, with more patience than she expected, to hear why she had been so curious.

She'd given away a lot of her own experience in being so inquisitive, she was sure, but since Ginny was always on her arse about repressing things, it would not stop her from making inquiries.

"Go on then, I know you're going to ask."

"Not like I haven't already tried…." the redhead grunted puckishly as she scooted closer to her chosen sister.

"What aren't you telling me? What happened, mate? You look like you got stunned by a bloody quaffle to the head!"

Hermione chewed her lower lip, trying to think of where the hell to even start. Where had the strangeness even begun?

"Well, the structure was a bit different... I mean, it was only four vows. Whittled down to basically honour and respect, help carry your burdens, be kind, and try to see the best in each other. Pretty arranged marriage-y. But each time we agreed to a vow, a cord was cast. And the cords were bright fucking red, they lit up like a furnace, were just about as hot and… tingly. Plus, towards the end they pulsed. Throbbed, almost. I honestly still somewhat feel them. And the kiss was... well, it was like sticking one's fingers into a light socket. But in a… favourable way?"

Ginny's brows popped up at the last bit of information, licking her lips as she pressed herself forwards to judiciously grab her friend's nearest wrist.

"So… Snape can kiss well?"

"Not the point of the story, Gin," Hermione admonished with a sigh, though couldn't help but let out a small snicker, looking away from her sudden burst of curiosity a bit guiltily.

"But... Yes, while I was a bit distracted by the weird electric current running amok around my body for no apparent reason, it seems that he can kiss quite well. And the whole thing wasn't just a ceremonial effect, trust me. I checked. Twice..."

"I'm sorry….. you what?! You chose to kiss Professor Snape more than you actually were required to? Our professor Snape. For all intents and purposes…. War hero, yes. But well, I suppose he can be rather…. sexy…. in a brooding, grumpy, challenging sort of way…." she shook her head immediately. Not okay Gin, for many a reason….

"Oy, nevermind. And, that's 'Not the point,' my arse, Hermione! What's going on with you? Don't tell me you've had some secret crush on him this entire time, one that you've conveniently failed to fucking inform me about?" she crossed her arms defiantly and served the light brunette a playful grin of accusation.

Hermione's brows rose skeptically at Ginny's comment, if only because she'd never once said so before. And Ginny wasn't exactly the type to censor her thoughts, even at the risk of disparaging those around her. Actually, especially when she could disparage those around her… Though at least she didn't feel like she'd utterly lost her mind anymore, since that was exactly her view of things. Still, she did feel the need to defend herself against the inexorable tone of accusation she'd just taken.

"I mean it was very bizarre! We had to see if it was a fluke, of course, so we tried a second time… definitely was not. It uh... well, it got worse. And then, when we went to leave, I... realised that maybe the rings were charmed in some way, since they were sent to us by the Wizengamot with the news, from gods know where, so I had to try it without them. But no, no difference... Well, there was a difference, but it definitely was no less kinetic."

Shaking her head from her neurotic ramble - well done - she finally held up her hands in surrender.

"The point is, nothing is going on. We had to get married the first time we'd even directly communicated in years. We interacted for all of an hour, at most. And, I mean, it certainly went better than I thought it would over all…."

Ginny attended to Hermione's words with an eager ear as she, more so than not, prated through the events for her own sake more so than that of Ginny's as a listener.

She did do her utmost, however, to refrain from snorting at Hermione's last few statements, given that the ones prior to them seemed to completely upset them. Indeed, there clearly was something going on between them, even if neither of them were fully put on to it yet.

"Apologies, but when you say, 'it got worse,' what exactly do you mean by that?" she arched a pointed brow that clearly said, 'Don't you dare try and lie to me.'

"As in, the effects of the magic got… fiercer. More tangible," Hermione clarified in a clinical tone, brushing her hair off her face reflexively, despite it being mostly unnecessary.

"Right," Ginny replied with an obvious eye-roll at her matter-of-fact answer.

"I get that, 'Mione, but what I mean is, how did those side effects manifest in you? 'Cause, clearly, they did. So….?"

The other woman sighed wearily, trying to think of a way to describe it that Ginny would fully grasp which wouldn't sound wholly ridiculous, or, too perverse. Electricity had been the first thing to come to mind, but not the most wizard-friendly analogy or even really the most accurate. Hm.

"...You know when you cast a particularly strong spell, especially a hex, or a patronus even, and you feel the backlash of the energy kind of go up your arm and run through you, and it stuns you a bit, if you're not used to it? Like that, only it started from my mouth and then it coursed its way straight through… everywhere else."

"'Mione, are you, effectively, saying that you got horny? Was it purely 'magical?' Because what you've just described sounds like you're hiding the former under the latter, babes," she crossed her arms over her chest and pursed her lips purposefully.

"Fine. Yes, but it was not hidden under the magic, it was very clearly induced by it," Hermione grumbled with clear frustration, her hands coming up with a scoff.

"That's why I'm worried, especially if it's not some 'normal' side effect. I'm not accustomed to spontaneously being zapped into a mood in five seconds. Normally it takes concerted effort, to be honest."

Ginny snickered at her friends' obvious frustration with, well, being frustrated, and clicked her tongue against her teeth.

"Just as a 'casual' observer, bless my brother, but you two were clearly more an item out of convenience and wartime than anything actually compatible. Have you ever thought that maybe it's not magic, 'Mione. I don't know, maybe it's fucking Snape?"

"I know what magic feels like, Ginny," she snapped back a bit too shortly, and gave her a reluctant look of apology.

"He experienced the same thing and was equally as confused and disturbed, so also points to some… interference. Now, as for if it's just magic… One issue at a time, I say. And shite, speaking of your brother, has Harry told Ron anything? Do you know?"

Ginny's brows flew upwards in appreciation of her admittance to the sensation, and rose even more when she revealed that she, apparently, knew for certain that he, himself, had also experienced the same feelings.

"Right, I'll address your last question first, and then we are jumping back to the vital bit of information you casually just tossed at me," Ginny paused to sit up more properly.

"Ron is under the assumption that, whilst this is going on, it likely won't 'be sorted' soon, since that's what Harry's convinced him into thinking. So, it's going to be a bit of an upset for him, yes. However, we've got time to deal with that, surely…?"

"Not sure how true that is, but he'll have to live with it, regardless. You might want to tell him not to buy into a single mention of my name in the Prophet for the next year at least," Hermione sighed, shooting Ginny a half-hearted glare as she pulled her legs up onto the couch to tuck beneath her.

"And yes... I told you, we both agreed it was bizarre, so obviously, it wasn't just me. Not in such a direct way, of course…."

"We'll have to deal with Ronald, and his rage, sooner rather than later, but for now…. I'm sorry, but I need more details about your fucking husband - Professor Bloody Snape!" Ginny pressed incredulously, knowing full well she was on the verge of being a bit of a brat about the entire thing, but she really was quite unable to help it at this point.

It was the most exciting thing she'd been party to in ages. Not to mention the most interesting. And so, she went against her wiser instinct to back off when Hermione began to put up her defenses, and attempted to back the fellow lioness into a corner even more.

"But… he didn't come out and say, 'Oh, I may be getting a semi, apologies…' ? I mean, not to be too crude but, fuck it, could you feel… anything? Otherwise, how can you be so certain that he felt likewise?" she bit her bottom lip in coquettish enthusiasm.

"Fuck's sake, we just agreed about the whole mystical aspect the first time and then it was just very... indirect, yet, obvious from there," Hermione explained with a wince, though it quickly shifted into a exasperated snicker.

"The only time I was even close enough to tell was the last time, and I wasn't trying to pay attention…. It was meant to be experimental, or…a test, rather."

She let out a weary groan. This was not going well.

"You know what I mean."

"Do I? Regardless, if you didn't 'try' you're a bloody fool, 'Mione," Ginny couldn't help but tease as she poked her best friend with her big toe.

"Merlin, you do realise you've managed to snatch not only the most hated war veteran ever, but also the most celebrated…. Not to mention the most genius. Oi, you two are going to make such obnoxious kids…." she blew a shot of air through her lips.

"I said I wasn't trying to, doesn't mean I'm oblivious…. And there will be no making of children, or anything for quite a while, if I even decide I want to do so then. I'd love to see them try to force me. I will be married to a potion's master," she replied, pinching the bridge of her nose and trying not to think about how infuriating that possibility even was.

"But yes, I am well aware..."

"But, I mean, he can't possibly want that either? Like, it's all well and good for you to maybe realise some subconscious crush or whatever. But surely Severus - odd to the tongue that one is," she pulled a face, and corrected herself.

"Surely Snape hates the idea of it all, let alone the shagging of a former student….." she thought for a moment, before what Hermione had insinuated, finally caught up with her and she did a double take so grand she thought her own neck would snap off.

"Merlin, 'Mione, you mean you could feel his…." she arched her brow in imitation of the man in question, "... cock?"

"No, Ginny, he's a Ken doll," Hermione found herself sneering as her eyes rolled again.

"It would've been difficult not to, in the… stance we'd taken. He's tall, and I had to get quite close… Regardless, not the point! And again, not my focus! Moving on to your first comment, he wasn't exactly a fan of the initial idea, no. But he was grateful and seemed rather amused about the awkwardness of the whole thing at points, so it's not like he was in a state of total revulsion. Seemed more like he was convinced that I felt that way towards him than anything else. When he realised I didn't detest him outright, it seemed like he got a bit less 'stoney'… towards me, anyway."

Ginny watched her best friend mull through the grain that was her mind and she smirked to herself knowingly.

"It seems to me, 'Mione, that you don't seem horribly miffed about any of this. Perhaps he'll make a snake out of you yet… Though, speaking of that, I must say I'm quite chuffed at the thought of the head of Slytherin having to kiss the golden girl of his house's greatest rival ..." She grinned wickedly and rubbed her hands together mischievously.

In spite of her own befuddlement at the whole experience, Hermione couldn't help but chuckle a bit at that minor 'triumph'.

"And a muggleborn too. Old Salazar must be rolling in his grave," she agreed with a faint scoff.

"I get a feeling house rivalry is going to be a common thread to pull throughout this experience. He's going to keep teasing me about it, I'm sure of it. I'll need to start wearing more red…."

"Well, before we move on entirely, I do have to know, since you likely won't be getting that close to him again anytime soon, I'm assuming… Was, well, heh, was he actually aroused a bit, could you tell? Or, is the dungeon-bat just that… well-endowed? You know what they say about big hands and noses…."

"Oh, I don't know. It's hard to say…" Hermione stuttered back after giving her a flummoxed look of disapproval, though quickly shut her eyes in a grimace as she realised her own unfortunate choice of words.

"Fuck, I mean, um… that theory has certainly not been disproved, but it wasn't… overt? He isn't a bloody schoolboy after all..."

"Well, perhaps he wears all black and a long jacket and cloak for a reason….?" Ginny giggled, covering her face in slight mortification at objectifying the man so, especially after so many years of fear and loathing thrown towards him - conditioned in her or not.

Hermione rolled her eyes again after a hint of sardonic half-agreement and snapped her fingers at Ginny in a nigh-on-McGonagall-esque manner. Honestly, it was hard enough for her to keep her own mind out of the proverbial gutter at present

"Oh, do pull yourself together already, this is not helpful! Please, take into account you're probably going to have to be in the same room as the man at some point. I did just marry him."

Ginny blanched at the thought, her visage turning a shade that almost matched that of her hair.

"Oh, gods, how am I ever going to keep my eyes above his belt after this conversation…" She covered her face before rubbing it and finally resigned herself to sighing dramatically.

"Suppose you're in a worse spot than I am, though. Speaking of which, when do you have to see him next, anyways?"

"Oh, that…. Well, he did, sort of, invite me up to visit his this coming weekend?" Hermione proffered carefully, knowing for a fact that Ginny was about to take that information and sprint with it like a cheetah on a limping warthog. She, therefore, quickly decided to specify upon the information before Ginny could pounce on the idea of it being some kind of… date.

"To discuss everything without being prodded at by the ministry, rather. And, to see his house since, eventually, we're supposed to live together, or, at least, give the impression of doing so…."

"You're going up to Spinner's End?! And he invited you of his own volition…? Or, they made you two have to choose a time to get together upon leaving, or whatever?" the Weasley investigated further with eager determination to get as much from the other witch as she could do.

"No, he definitely invited me," Hermione corrected a tad antsily.

"I mean Minerva could have twisted his arm, but either way, it has to be an indication that he's being cooperative, right? But, one way or another it's either going to be very interesting or very awkward - or, most likely, a lot of both…."

"Hmm, well, I suppose he isn't abhorrently against the idea then? Or, maybe he thinks he can get out of it before the year's end….? Regardless, Hermione, you snogged Snape…. And apparently turned him on. Well bloody done," she smirked and stretched slightly before settling back into her seat to add with a pointed look of animation.

"And, you get to see him again, in a couple of days? Alone, in the privacy of his childhood home…. Merlin, you are about to walk into some very perilous quarters. Not to mention tantalising…" She wagged her brows suggestively.

"Do be sure to tell me if his bed is actually a coffin or just covered in black satin sheets?"

Hermione laughed outright, shaking her head.

"He is neither Dracula nor the Phantom of the Opera - silhouette notwithstanding - I don't think he's sleeping in a coffin. However, I really can't see him with white sheets..." she half teased, half agreed, though her features lost their mirth slowly but surely and she exhaled a hum of perplexion.

She had hoped, actually, that expelling her thoughts might clarify - well, anything about the evening - but really, she felt all the more… agitated. And the bizarre throbbing seemingly emanating from her ring finger wasn't helping her process any more clearly. Especially as it, apparently, refused to remain centered in her extremities

"I know I've asked you multiple times before, Gin, but…. What do you really think of this all? I didn't just do something dreadfully foolish, did I? I mean, I don't think I did, obviously, but…."

"Well, thank you for using me as your backboard, but, Hermione, as I've stated countless times already, whilst the match did throw me at first, and did take some time getting used to…. It actually seems like you two could be… very well… suited for one another."

The ginger shrugged before tilting her head to the left to give her friend a small grin.

"The fact that I actively 'ship' you two now is besides the point…."

"I suppose so… Not that I even want to know what that entails," Hermione agreed with a playful compressing of her lips.

"I mean, the goals were to avoid his getting unjustly persecuted, marry someone who isn't an idiot, and inconveniencing the ministry as much as humanly possible whilst doing so. Past that I hadn't really considered all the particulars... But, I can't say I hate it so far… I am, albeit, very confused by it ..."

"Well, you very cleverly managed to help avoid those possibilities and then some," Ginny congratulated her with a small chortle.

"But it clearly seems I'm not going to get much more out of you right now. Which, to be fair, you're clearly still going over it all, so, who am I to press much more? However, I do stand by the prediction that you two will, eventually, be a sickeningly love-bitten power couple."

She smirked at her friend with a gaze of foresight and superiority.

Hermione couldn't help but look blatantly skeptical, despite Ginny's odd excitement, though still granted her a crooked smile.

"All right, cool it with the divination. I know nothing about how this will go nor much about him, really. I mean I know everything of importance on paper, obviously, but as an actual individual - there's a lot further to go, there. Thankfully, we've got a year of mutual annoyance and false pretense to deal with, so there's time."

"Yeah, bloody good thing that. Certainly seems like you'll need all the time you can fancy when it comes to learning that one. And to prepare for the inevitable shag session," she raised her eyes gleefully.

"Probably the bit I'm looking most forward to hearing about…. But, surely, when you do go to see him, you can suss out more about his person just by the contents, atmosphere of the place, I'd imagine…?" she offered, as a buoyant determinant.

"Yes, true. He's supposed to send his crow with the address when he's settled, because of course he has one. Can't just have an owl," Hermione responded, chuckling a bit.

Ginny snorted in mock annoyance.

"Merlin, of course he fucking does. He really goes hard trying for the 'Goth' trope, doesn't he? However," she paused as she leant down to scratch an itch on her ankle, "that should be quite an… experience."

"Who knows how soon they're going to start 'coordinating' us too," Hermione couldn't help but pipe up with a slight curl of her lip.

"Can't wait for that."

"Merlin's tits, you know, I'd say I'm shocked, but I'm honestly, well, not. When it comes to the ministry, there's plenty of corruption still ingrained in the crevasses. But oy, they're really giving you a bloody manager? Don't they realise who they're dealing with? You two are quite the control freak duo - no offense."

"No, that's valid. I'm sure we'll be doing a lot of defying of protocol out of sheer spite, which will be pretty ironic." Hermione cracked a grin.

"Just hopefully whoever they toss us won't be a total Umbridge."

"Well, I don't have very high hopes on that one, but we can always pray," Ginny commented with a resigned sigh.

As she had so unabashedly stated earlier, Ginny knew by this point she'd rather exhausted Hermione's patience with all of her badgering, especially as the poor woman had barely had any time to reflect on herself, let alone her vexingly private inner life. And so, deciding it was time to cut her friend a break, Ginny mercifully turned the conversation to the latest misadventures of Harry's go at 'fatherhood'. That, at least, they could both get a laugh out of.

Broaching no argument at the change of subject, Hermione was actually fairly pleased to simply sit and listen to Ginny palaver on for a while. Even Crookshanks seemed to settle in nearby more calmly, though she had her suspicions he had been snooping the entire time. As much as a feline, even a magical one, could do so.

Though relieved as she was to talk about something that had absolutely nothing to do with her, her mind was still wandering, mulling over the sheer absurdity of what had occurred that evening and what its still lingering impact meant, trying to rationalise or excuse it and coming up frustratingly empty. It wasn't until she found herself falling into silence, literally on the verge of zoning out lest she hop to her feet and begin to pace, did she forcefully shut down her subconscious, at least for the moment.

Bless Ginny, but she didn't think she could try and keep up any more small talk if she were paid to. Waiting for a lull in her most recent baby-centric commentary, she demonstratively looked up at the clock on the mantle.

"Think Harry's ripping his hair out yet?"

"Oh, very likely," Ginny yawned as she, too, looked over her shoulder to eye the time.

"Bloody fuck, it's already nine-thirty? Shite, Harry's never gonna be able to manage to keep the little bastard asleep. Right, I've got to floo home. Don't worry 'bout Harry, I'll fill him in and insist he not pester you as much as I've done," she chuckled in self-deprecation as she stood up, gathered her things and then steered over to give Hermione a quick peck on the cheek.

"Positive you're okay…?" she questioned for a final time in the name of insurance.

"Yes, yes. Perfectly fine. I'm probably just going to busy myself with some research, take a bath, and go to sleep frankly. So, go on, I'm sure I'll see Harry at work and he can interrogate me then," she persisted, not about to make her want to linger any further.

"Right. Good."

Ginny paused as if she were about to say something more but had thought better of it.

"Love you, talk soon, or I'll fly over here myself and make you!" She finished with a grin before crossing to the fireplace, grabbing a fistful of floo powder, and poofing away.

Hermione let her eyes roll amicably as she watched the hearth return to normalcy, and the flames slowly lose their greenish hue.

At least that hadn't gone horribly wrong, though she was beginning to think Ginny'd been stuck in the house far too long if she was this invested in her rather contractual excuse for a personal life. Still, she had brought a few points to light that even Hermione, herself was going to have to consider. And consider thoroughly.

For the moment, however, she had every intention of delving through her bookshelves and finding any mention of handfasting and/or binding magic she could decipher. Likely, with a large glass of wine involved. Perhaps even two.

After all, it was her wedding night.