18th/24th March 2019: The Night That Changed Her

She was distraught, her face was hot and sticky from all the tears she cried but he was there for her, holding her close and making sure she was safe. She kept stressing how it was all her fault but he knew she wouldn't have done this on purpose, Carla cared too much about people she was hardly selfish even if she may seem it on the outside. She was the most considerate and caring person in the world when you really got to know her.

Immediately he was worried and he needed to speak to her about what really happened, he didn't really know the implications of what happened at her beloved factory would have on the person his heart adored. He just hoped that she would be ok by the end of all this.

As soon as it happened she changed, she was jumpy and she was more reliant on him to support her, for once she wasn't pushing him away but it was typical really, he mused, that something so tragic brought them close together again. He then noticed the relationship she had with Roy and that was something which he didn't realise was such a big thing in her life, but with both him and Roy supporting her he thought that she could conquer the world, only if his thoughts were a reality.

His mind was brought back to when he walked through the cafe door in search for her to tell her how much she loved him and that he was there for her after hearing about the tragic disaster at her factory which used to be their factory. He saw her curled up in the corner crying to herself, the situation really hit home for her and he could tell it was eating her up from the insides to the outside of her facade, she was no longer that woman who would walk around in her killer heels without a care in the world, she was Carla still, almost the same as a scared little girl but she was still his Carla and at that point deep down he knew that this would be the night which would change her forevermore.

They went upstairs a short while later, she didn't want to turn the light on but he managed to get her upstairs and changed into something comfier, he never left her side. She immediately got into bed and stared up at the ceiling, she didn't know how to feel about everything, she knew she definitely felt sad with an overwhelming sense of loneliness, she was worried that Peter wasn't enough to fill that sense entirely. The tears fell but he was there for her, she curled up next to him, skin to skin contact and she thrived again, she was happy, there was a small smile on her face and a simple thing like that was what Peter was happy about considering the overwhelming disaster of the factory roof.

They talked some more, she cried a bit and he held her, just like they used to do in the day. They spoke about the events and what happened and how everything came to be but all he could justify from the conversation was nothing because she wasn't making any literal sense because her brain was so mashed from the day's events but he listened nonetheless with her trying to explain herself, he sensed she needed to get it all out of her system. She refused to sleep and Peter knew she would, when something like this happened to Carla in the past she wouldn't sleep at all, she would be unsettled and feel uncomfortable, so afraid of shutting her eyes in case she missed something or the fear of something else happening, it was a whirlwind of a time.

The tears came again and he soothed her gently in his arms, he held her just as he did before, she leaned up and kissed him on the lips, poking her tongue eagerly at the seam of his lips, she swirled her tongue around his and the kiss soon became hot and needy, she hooked her leg over his hip and brought him into her, she sighed lustfully, he pulled away.

"No"

"Why?" she asks "We've both wanted this for so long"

"You've been through something traumatic, I don't want to take advantage"

"You wouldn't be" she reassures him knowing that he would be thinking that "Please I want to forget"

"This isn't the way" he whispers cupping her cheek, she sighs in response holding him close to her "You need time to come to terms with this"

"I don't" she shakes her head "I love you, Peter, I've been so afraid to say it because as soon as I did it opened up all of these possibilities which I didn't want to deal with in my life, but I love you"

"I love you too, I always have" he mumbles "I would love to have all of you right now but this isn't the time, you need to be in the right headspace, baby"

Her heart warmed at her pet name, she let more tears fall

"The tears falling from your eyes suggest to me that you are in no way ready for this" he states causing her to nod "The afterglow of sex won't fix your problems"

"I know" she nods glancing to him and smiling slightly "You being here its enough, it is, but I just want to forget and by immersing myself in sex it just seemed right, I'm sorry"

"You don't need to apologise" he presses his forehead to her head "You have me, I'm not going to leave you and no matter how defensive and how hard you try to push me away I'm not going anywhere"

"I fell bad though"

"Why?"

"You were meant to be starting your new life away from me-"

"I chose this" he whispers "I chose you I don't need a boat to have happiness, I have to have you to be happy"

"Likewise" she nods slowly resting both of her hands on his chest, her head rested under his chin "Did you really want to leave?"

"No" he shakes his head "But I sensed that you wanted me to and if me leaving was going to make you happy then I would have gone in a heartbeat"

"I didn't want you to go Peter" she sighs gently looking up at him "I was just too afraid to admit wanting a future with you"

"And that's ok because now I can help you"

"It's funny isn't it?"

"What is?"

"How we're always brought together through a disaster, first my drinking, then Frank now a factory roof collapsing, sums up our life really doesn't it?"

"I guess so" he had to laugh at her statement "Everything's such a mess but we'll get through this together"

"We will and whatever happens I want you here with me, supporting me and looking after me, no matter what I say even if I push you away I want you here ok, please don't leave me"

"Never, you and me, this our chance to make everything right to give another go at our relationship"

"Good because I don't think I will be able to go through this without you Peter Barlow"

"Me neither Carla Connor"