January
Home is not a safe place. After patching the hallway with drywall, cleaning up the shards of her favorite vase, setting her furniture back to normal, it is hard to walk in. She felt vulnerable there. She even feels vulnerable here.
Her fingers tap at her desk, and she goes over her notes, once again, to kill time. Her hand goes to her bandaged shoulder and she continues reading the paperwork on her desk.
There is a light knock on the door, startling her, before it opens. The visitor she hadn't seen since the night at the hospital.
"How did you get in?" she meant for her voice to be forceful, but instead she can hear the cowardice echo in the room.
Madara gives a simple hand gesture of hello, and then he walks further into the room. "The cleaning crew just arrived and they think I'm just an assistant who is picking up paperwork. I just happened to show up right after they opened the doors. There was no need for me to use my key." He points up his finger and she can hear a vacuum cleaner start up.
He doesn't take a seat, instead he walks right up to her desk before squatting so that he is eye level with her.
"I didn't know therapists worked such long hours."
Her lips twitch downward, "Just a little overtime."
"It's almost eleven thirty and you've been here since four in the morning."
She tenses at his information. "You've been stalking me?"
He doesn't answer her question. "You've been working the same hours all week and you even have bags under your eyes. I'm sure that coming back from medical leave hasn't truly accumulated this much work. You just don't want to go home, especially since you have tomorrow off."
Her grip tightens at his words as her hands shake. She narrows her eyes and tries to puff out her chest to give the allusion of some bravado. She opens her mouth to rebuke him, when he continues on.
"I would like to offer an alternative."
She closes her mouth and tries to think of what his alternative might be, but can't. "What's the alternative?" She relents.
"I'm heading up to my cabin tonight. Would you like to join me?"
She sputters, looking for an excuse and in surprise. The last she'd seen him, he'd been warning her to stay away. "I-I thought you said-"
He smiles and cuts her off, "as long as I'm in the green, I might as well use it to my advantage."
Her lips twitch, but before she can't refuse, he continues on. "You did break my rib."
She isn't going to be coerced. "You did bring a gun to my house."
His smile drops and the black eyes become more narrowed in thought. "I am trying to help you."
"I don't need help," the words snap out of her mouth. Her heart rate thumps against her bones and she feels sick. She tries to reduce the bluntness of her words, "I am fine. I'm just trying to catch up on work. Thank you for the offer."
He doesn't budge though, and she knows he doesn't believe her. "You're letting fear control you. You're scared to walk into your own house."
Her fists tighten and she stands from her sitting position. She opens her mouth and then closes it. She wants to deny it all, to tell him to mind his own damn business. But she doesn't say anything. He's telling her what she doesn't want to admit.
He stands. "Take some time away. Stay at Sasuke's or another friends."
Sasuke? The idiot had barely spoken to her, still mad about what she said at the hospital. Which meant mostly sitting in front of the tv with him drinking a beer while he hn'd in anger, not too much different really. But she wasn't going to spend the night at his house when hers was right there. And her other friends… Admitting to herself she wasn't strong was hard enough. She is supposed to be the voice of reason for all of her friends. She is supposed to be the person who had it all together; the job, the house, emotions. She shakes her head, taking a step away from her desk. "I'm heading home."
He cracks his neck and then rolls his shoulders before giving a long sigh. "What about family?"
Not going to happen. "Have a good night, Mr. Uchiha."
He catches her at the door, blocking her way out. "Let me help you."
Her nails dig into her palms. "I don't need-"
"Let me at least drive you home, it doesn't look like you can stay awake."
She doesn't want to go home. She doesn't want to stay. She wants to hide somewhere, lock herself away from the rest of the world and never come out again. She knows she can't let it control her though. If she lets her fear fester; if she runs away now, she will not come back. She cannot afford to be so terrified for the rest of her life. She straightens her back, trying to fill herself with courage.
"You're still welcome at my cabin. I've bought groceries for breakfast. You can see my falcons in the morning."
The offer is tempting. It would be nice to get away from home, away from people. What she isn't certain of, is the company. She scans his face, looking for any sign that his offer had ill intentions. His face is serious, but not with anger or hatred. She grabs the bridge of her nose and closes her eyes. What did she know? She thought the lady wasn't going to shoot. She didn't know people; she didn't know anything.
"What's the worst that could happen?"
She doesn't even have to think, the words come naturally, "I could die." He could kill her and hide the body in the mountains. Nobody would find her again.
"So being scared to death of everything is living?"
She is tired and the line is too cliche to give a retort; she doesn't want to continue this conversation. She wants to put everything far from her mind. "Have a good night."
He doesn't budge from the doorway though. "I'm at least driving you home. I would feel responsible if you fell asleep at the wheel."
She has to agree with that. She is tired, but she doubts she'd fall asleep. But she's never gone so long without rest; she couldn't even sleep for an hour at a time. Every time her eyes closed, she dreamed of gunshots. She'd bolt awake, drenched in sweat and ready to run.
She relents to the drive home. She lets him out first and then locks up her office. She continues to follow him to the parking lot. She expects a car, but instead he gets into a truck with a camper shell and starts the diesel engine. She opens the passenger side and pulls herself into the tall vehicle.
She thanks him when they pull to the curb outside of her house, jumping out and giving a wave goodbye. She walks up, noting how dark it is outside without her porch light on. It's halfway up her driveway, out of view of the truck, that she freezes. Her heart has begun to beat faster, and she clutches at the keys in her purse. She can see many places where someone might be hiding. She takes deep breaths trying to calm her rattled nerves. Then something touches her.
She yanks away. Her heart lurches in her throat and she whips around as if to meet an opponent, fist pulled back to hit.
It is only Madara. She hadn't even heard him shut the truck door. How long had she been standing in her driveway? Her heart continues to pound in her chest like a hammer, still unsettled.
"Would you like me to check the house?"
The offer is kind, but she shakes her head and looks down. She has to be able to do this. She has to be strong enough to confront her fears. This is her home. She can't be scared of coming home.
He touches her shoulder and pulls her into a light hug. She doesn't cry, thankfully. Instead she gives him a light hug back, before letting go. He backs off and brushes back her hair. "Do you want to go to Sasuke's?"
"No," the answer, immediate.
"Do you want to stay here?"
"No." Right now, this was the place she wanted to be away from. "But I can't stay away forever."
"How about one more night? Come to the cabin, you won't get this chance again until May. The passes are planned to be shut down in a couple weeks due to snow."
She looks up her driveway, at the darkened windows. She looks back at Madara. One more day sounds nice. She gives a half nod, still a bit wary of accepting. But Madara seems the safer option than traversing up the steps and unlocking the door. It would only be for a night, she'd stayed the night with him before at the lake house. Nothing had happened then, in fact, the company had been enjoyable.
They both get back into the truck. He starts the engine, and they head for the mountains.
"What about your birds," Sakura asks, "will they be alright until May?"
"That's another reason why I'm going up." He uses his thumb to point to the back of the truck, to the camper shell. "I'll be taking all three of them back with me. The local zoo is happy to take care of them. There's already some snow, but only a couple of inches are expected in the next couple of days. Else I'd be packing them up tonight... this morning." His eyes look at the clock on the dashboard, it is already past midnight.
He continues to keep up light conversation, and she slowly rests her head against the window and eventually the world becomes white, and then she drowses off.
Bang!
She jumps up, practically running. She falls onto the cold floor and she reaches for her dresser to pull herself up, but it isn't there. She gets immediately on her feet, ready to run from the woman with the gun. But once she is up, she does not recognize where she is.
The moonlight from the window allows her to see. There is a couch, where she'd been laying, and an empty fireplace. There is a desk against one wall and open walkways leading further into the house. It takes a moment, but she finally remembers.
She breathes out and smoke seems to come from her mouth. She shivers, it is cold here. She grabs the blanket from the floor and wraps it around herself. Then she walks to the window and looks outside.
It is beautiful. The landscape is snow dusted with moonlight shining off and it looks like a painted picture. She follows the nearest walkway into the kitchen, and then to the door that leads outside. It is colder outside, but the feeling makes it all more ethereal.
For several long moments she stares out in awe and then the quiet world is broken by a soft male tone, "You've only been asleep for a couple of hours."
She turns, seeing a flare of red in the darkness from the corner of the covered roof. Madara is sitting there, smoking.
She hadn't smelt smoke inside of his house.
"Ah," she acknowledges his words, but doesn't comment any further. A couple of hours was better than what she had been getting. She walks closer to him and can now see the outline of a table and the multiple chairs positioned around the table. He has taken the one closest to the corner of the porch. She slides into the one against the house, so that she can stare out at the landscape.
"This place is beautiful."
"That it is," he replies, tapping the end of the cigarette against the ashtray in front of him. "You should see it up here in summer, especially near the cliff. The sunrise hits the lake just right."
There is no awkward silence, just silence. It feels right to Sakura, who curls up in her chair with a blanket. It is calm and relaxing up here, cold, but there is a sense of peace.
She props her head on her knees and stares out at the white field.
After a while she finally asks, "How did you come by this place?" She knew the lake house had been passed down the Uchiha family, but she hadn't heard about this place.
He shifts then, sitting more upright. "I bought it for my first wife, Hona. Before she passed, I thought the air here would do her some good." He crushes the cigarette in the ashtray. He stands, pushing the chair back, "Let's head in, it's getting a bit cold. I'll put on some tea."
She looks back at the yard, wanting to ask further, but she isn't one to push for answers when it was obvious he didn't want to speak of the matter.
She follows him into the small blue kitchen. There is a two person, flimsy wooden table set off to the side and the only appliances are a refrigerator and stove. He sets a kettle on the stove and she takes a seat at the table to watch him.
"How long have you been sleeping every night?" he asks.
Her lips twitch at the private question, but she tries to stop his questioning with a general answer, "Not long."
He turns to her then, black eyes holding her green. "How long is 'not long'?"
"A couple hours…" If an hour at all.
He takes out coffee mugs and puts them on the counter, putting a bag of black tea in each. "Have you talked to someone about it?"
"That's none of your business." She'd been nice about not talking about his first wife, she expects him to extend the same courtesy to her.
He blinks and gives a shrug, ignoring her curt reply. "I suppose I'll take that as a no."
The kettle whistles and he turns his attention to pouring the boiling liquid into the mugs. He sets them on the table, and then gets out honey and a spoon and sets those down as well. He turns off the stove and then sits across from her.
"As a therapist, I would think you would understand the importance of speaking to someone," he doesn't drop the subject.
"I just need some time." Just a bit more time and everything would go back to normal. But even to her ears her voice sounds desperate.
"You were screaming in your sleep," he swirls his tea and then takes a sip.
Her eyes stare at her tea and she pours the honey into it before stirring with the spoon. She remains silent, unwilling to acknowledge the statement. She takes a quick drink. He tries to wait her out, and when she lifts her eyes from the tea he is staring at her. She doesn't budge.
After about another minute of silence, he finally says, "I'm sorry."
"For being too nosy?" It is starting to annoy her.
His lips twist slightly downwards, "No. Not for that…" He looks down for a second as if debating something. Then he looks up, "I want to apologize for getting you involved in the fight between my sister and me."
"Huh?" her eyebrows rise, not really understanding.
"Even when we were kids, Mikoto and I never got along. We used to come to blows over the smallest thing, the only thing we've ever had in common is Izuna." Madara gives a sigh.
She's just as confused as before. "I'm not sure I understand."
He cracks his neck slightly before continuing, "My sister got involved when both me and Mui had already agreed upon a divorce and were signing the papers. She gave us a card and told us to go to this therapy session she'd set up on our behalf. Both of us were furious…" His eyes went down again, "so we decided we'd have a bit of fun."
Shock rattles through Sakura's body. The last bit hit her so hard she could barely breathe. "I was played?"
He nodded, "Mui and I drove in the same car. While I was to go in and be a patient husband, Mui would mess up her hair and put on some cologne, pretending to be in an affair. She'd come in after making sure to be late."
"It was all an act, but-?" His ex-wife had seemed to be in a real affair.
His lips flickered slightly up, "Mui loves drama and she always looks for opportunities to practice her trade; although I might have coerced her a bit on this one. She got a part on Broadway, her moving away was one of the reasons we decided to get a divorce."
She can't believe it. Her mind quickly retraces every meeting she'd had with the couple. She's gone over them countless times, trying to find her errors, but now… with this new knowledge. Her lips pinch together at the thought of all the worrying she'd done over the two not reconciling. Her heart clenches painfully in her chest. She goes over every interaction in her head. From their first meeting to seeing him on the porch trying to find a flaw, "But-at my house, you looked ill?"
"I'd been sick for several days," he gives a shrug, "I'd just gotten over the flu. I would have been there sooner."
"But-why did you-the gun," she says, her voice becoming crisp.
Madara's eyes flash then, "I needed to make a point to Mikoto. It was not alright for her to get involved with my life, just because she thinks she knows better. She even went so far as to get you involved. I merely made a threat. Next time she'll think twice."
He blinks, realizing he is directing his anger at the person before him. The same person he is apologizing to. He closes his eyes and dips his head to her. "I am sorry that I brought the gun to your house and scared you. I want you to know I never had any intention of taking your life. I only wanted to stop my sister's pestering for good."
She grapples with the information. It occurs to her then, the only reason he has even admitted his guilt is because of what happened to her last month. She touches her shoulder. The man didn't want to be grouped with the patient's mother that had hurt her. Or. He is merely trying to reassure her that there is a low chance that someone else will come to her house with a gun. She purses her lips, not sure of what to believe.
"Again, I am sorry you got involved. But my sister needed to be taught a lesson, and she was the one that chose you." He finally lifts his head, eyes hard.
His choice in words irritates her. He sounds as if he is passing some of the blame onto his sister. "I think she just wanted you to be happy. She was only concerned-"
Madara's eyes narrow. "My sister's idea of happiness is not mine. Look at her relationship with Fugaku; I don't think they've kissed since Sasuke was five. Yet, still, she's resistant to even the notion of thinking about leaving him. She believes self-sacrificial suffering is a form of love, it isn't. Not when it is obvious that the other side is suffering the same as you."
Sakura blinks at the vicious words against Mikoto. She's never even thought about Fugaku and Mikoto being separated or that their relationship was bad. They'd always seemed just content and private people.
Madara sees her surprise and scoffs, "You really thought they were happy?"
Yes. When she was little, she dreamed of being married just like Mikoto and Fugaku. She'd wanted that simpleness. It was one of the reasons she'd been so interested in Sasuke. The reality struck her hard. How could she be so blind? Had she ever seen them hold hands or do more than smile at each other? How could she have wanted that?
Sakura sits back in the chair, her grip tightening on the cup. She wants to throw the cup at him and wake up from this nightmare. She'd been played like a fool by both Uchihas. Mikoto had convinced her to be a therapist, explaining it had only been a little fight, and Madara had fooled her into believing he was some innocent creature. She'd been used as a tool by both of them. She could barely believe it. The sense of confusion and panic about Fugaku's and Mikoto's relationship went away at the realization of the truth of her role. Her heart thrummed within her chest, matching her anger.
Sakura glares at Madara. "Then why is Mikoto so upset with me?"
Madara's eyes flicker to the left before he rubs the back of his neck.
Dread fills Sakura.
"I was trying to drive home a point about not getting involved. We, Mui and I, decided that if Mikoto felt it was her fault we got divorced then she'd learn her lesson."
"So you made it my fault that you got divorced."
Madara gave a nod.
"How?"
"Hm?"
"How did you make it my fault?"
Madara's eyes would not meet hers, "Well you convinced Mui to divorce me."
Her mouth hung for a second, "I convinced her?"
"You met with Mui outside of our office visits and began manipulating her, making her believe she was better off without me. In our meetings you would directly confront me, etc. Even though we had almost worked out our differences, she decided on a divorce because of you. I went to your house because I wanted revenge. Of course, I'm a good person, so I just wanted to scare you so you'd never do it to someone else."
Fury encapsulates Sakura. She can barely think straight. Mikoto thought she hadn't done her job correctly. No wonder she'd been so mad. No wonder she'd told Sakura to stay away from her family; she probably thought Sakura was some kind of conniving, evil woman.
"How dare you!" The coffee cup flew over the table, missing the man's head by a couple inches. The ceramic shattered against the kitchen cabinet.
Madara's eyes go wide, not suspecting an outburst. While he is stunned, Sakura tosses the flimsy table he has to the side, spilling the sugar and breaking his coffee mug. He tries to stand, but Sakura crosses the distance between them in a second and grabs his shirt collar. "You don't have a right to fuck around with my life! Mikoto was my friend!"
The man gets over his shock only to start laughing as if the whole ordeal is funny.
She slams him backwards, forcing the chair up against the cabinet. She grabs the phone from the wall, and then shoves it against his face. "You are going to call her and tell her the truth."
The man stops laughing only to make a comment on her previous statement, "Wouldn't a friend have asked you for the truth?"
At no reply, and with the phone digging into his face, he relents, "Fine, I will tell her the truth."
Sakura pulls the phone away and dials Mikoto's cell with one hand. She hits the speakerphone button, wanting to make sure he said it to the real Mikoto.
It rang several times before she answers, "Hello Madara, I'm about to get on my flight home; what's going on?"
"I've been feeling guilty, so I wanted to confess." His eyes flicker to Sakura, and the sincerity of his tone does not match the smirk on his face.
"Confess about what."
"I was lying about Ms. Haruno, about all of it."
There is silence on the other end of the line. Sakura wonders if the woman has hung up, but then she hears a boarding call. After several more moments there comes a quiet, angry reply. "You were what?"
"Lying. Ms. Haruno barely talked to Mui. She tried to counsel, did a bad job of it," at that Sakura's hand tightens on his shirt collar. She wants to scream it hadn't been therapy and he grins wickedly before continuing, "then sent us to a real marriage counselor. Mui and I just continued with our original decision of divorce."
Again, there is silence on the other end of the phone. "Do you have any idea what you've-"
"Have a nice flight." And with that he ends the call.
"Happy?" He asks Sakura and in his eyes is a hint of red.
She releases him, her anger barely subsided. Without another word she leaves the cabin and heads out into the snow. She is going home, where she belongs. She can't take anymore of this. Her emotions had been tossed around for months and then she'd thought he really needed her help. It had all been a bunch of lies.
She quickly decides she will find the main road and hitch a ride back to the city.
She is able to find the road out of his house, the snow barely an inch thick. She sets off and is able to get to the main highway. As she walks, her heart stops thumping so loud and her breathing begins to return to normal.
At first she tries walking on the highway, only to come to the realization that someone driving in this weather might hit her, so she walks off to the side. Then after fifteen more minutes of walking, with new snow starting to fall thickly and seeing no cars, she's completely cooled off.
She knows she'd gone completely insane. She is supposed to be cool and level headed, not blow up on the slightest whim. She'd broken the cups and table of the only person in the area who could possibly give her a ride home. He'd deserved it. But he is still the only person who could get her home.
She takes one look behind her, but the thought of going back and admitting she is wrong made her furious. She continues on, feet crunching in the snow, anger propelling her forward. After another twenty minutes, with the snow pelting at her eyes, she begins to doubt her decision. It is then, just as she is about to give up and turn around, she hears the crunch of chained tires against the snow coming from behind her.
She sticks out her thumb and hopes that the driver sees her, and that the vehicle doesn't slide off the road and strike her.
The truck gets beside her, and she looks up at it. It is Madara's. The window rolls down and she can see Madara inside. They both stare at each other for several moments, then he blinks.
"Please get in, Sakura."
She doesn't budge. She wants to get in, but she doesn't want to give him the satisfaction.
"I'm sorry. Please get in."
She looks down the road and barely sees the guardrail from the amount of snow whipping down on them. She doesn't have a choice. She straightens her shoulders and opens the door to the truck, then she climbs in. She hadn't realized how cold she was out there. With the heater blaring down on her, it feels like heaven.
"We're going back to my place until this passes. It should only be a couple of hours."
She wants to disagree, to tell him to go home, but she can barely see several feet down the road. There really is no other way.
"I will get you home."
She nods to him and relaxes. She closes her eyes, enjoying the warmth.
Her face is then touched and she jolts away from the hand. Her eyes open to glare.
"You're freezing..."
"It is snowing out there," she replies blandly, trying hard to keep in mind how much he has wronged her. She knows that she needs to stay angry, or she's bound to become a mess. She couldn't forgive so easily this time.
"I would have found you sooner, if you'd gone in the right direction."
He is going to try and blame her, put her on a guilt trip. She stares at his face, feeling her temple throb with her desire to hit him in the jaw. She can think of no good comeback, so she remains quiet.
He glances from the road to her, and then he laughs. "I didn't know you could get angry. That was hilarious. I don't think I've ever been so surprised."
She doesn't take the bait of laughing it off. He is trying to either provoke her, or calm her down. She isn't sure, but she knows he'll probably continue shifting techniques until he succeeds.
"Have you ever done that to Sasuke?"
She'd give him that one. She couldn't help the dark smirk that made its way onto her features. He saw it too.
"Good story?" he questions.
The smirk drops and she tells him without emotion. "I hit him, right in the gut, a couple weeks after we broke up." He'd quickly gotten over their one year relationship, and she caught him flirting around with some seniors. The same seniors that had picked on her relentlessly and had made her highschool life hell. She looks out the window, no longer caring for any conversation.
"You and Sasuke dated?"
She glances at him, "You didn't know?"
"No," he meets her eyes, "I can't imagine you two together. How are you still friends?"
She gives a sigh, "We had the same friends, so we just continued to hang out with them. There's about nine of us who've been together since we were very little. Eventually things just went back to the way they were. Well, somewhat." She hadn't been a lovesick puppy after Sasuke. "Nothing ever goes completely back."
"Hm. How did you end up living so close? Was it while you were-"
She lets out a sharp 'ha'. "We dated back in the first year of high school. So it wasn't because we were dating. And I moved into my place first. Why Sasuke moved so close... well, you'd have to ask him."
Madara gave a light chuckle, "Maybe my nephew still has a high school crush."
At that she can't help but laugh, her mood improving. "Unlikely. Naruto probably saw the place when he was visiting me and then told Sasuke about it."
"Hmm." The noise in the back of his throat sounds as if he doesn't quite believe that was all to the story, but from her perspective it is the truth.
The rest of the drive remains quiet, and they safely reach the cabin. The snow has added a couple of inches to the road, and the wind blows harder around them.
"So much for a couple of weeks," Madara quietly curses the weather. "I need to start packing the birds; we'll leave after that." He jumps out of the truck and makes his way around the back of the house, and further into the woods.
She hesitates, but follows after him.
They reach another larger building, that is more like a barn. She sees the netting for containing the birds. When she gets in, he already has leather gloves on and has one cage positioned so that he can place the bird inside. He opens one of the doors in the barn and gives a whistle. In an instant there is a bird, landing upon his outstretched hand. The bird tilts its head, listening to the man talk.
It obediently enters the cage and Madara locks the door of the cage and begins getting another bird. After all the birds have been put up, he covers the cages with a blanket. He grabs two of them and motions for her to do the same.
"Make sure to grab the handle, they do peck."
She follows him back through the billowing snow and to the truck. He puts his cages in the camper before taking hers. And then both are back in the truck.
At first the drive passes in silence, and Madara seems more intent on the road than starting a conversation.
But soon, Sakura finds herself picking a fight, "You're wrong."
He must have forgotten she was there because he flinches at the sound of her voice. His head tilts to the side though, analyzing her words. "Excuse me?" he finally asks.
"About Mikoto and Fugaku."
"Really? How am I wrong?" His tone belays his disbelief.
"They still love each other."
"I think you need to open your eyes-"
She ignores him, "If Fugaku didn't love Mikoto he wouldn't have come to my house with Mikoto to pick you up. He holds no obligation towards you."
"We are family."
"Extremely distant blood relatives, yes. But he wasn't there for you. He was there to support Mikoto."
"Just because-"
She ignores him and continues her analyzing further. "You're just jealous of your sister. While she has been happily married, your third wife just left you."
The truck slides as Madara slams on the breaks. Black eyes glare at her. She can feel the waves of hatred. She holds the gaze, almost gloating in it. Part of her wanted to make him just as angry, to test just how far she could push him.
"We both came to the decision."
"No, she wanted a divorce to move on with her life, go to New York, leave you. You just weren't willing to fight for her, or you did and you were so pathetic you failed." She knows that what she's doing is wrong. Hurting someone intentionally is horrible, but as she digs the knife in further she finds it hard to stop.
He tightens his grip on the steering wheel. For a moment, when one hand goes into a fist, she thinks he will hit her. Instead, the fist pounds on the dashboard and he starts laughing. "Not bad Ms. Haruno, not bad. I was beginning to wonder if you had a cruel bone in your body. Suppose that makes me feel a bit better. I was starting to feel truly guilty for scaring you with the gun. So, not bad Ms. Haruno."
Part of her begins to feel guilty. He may be laughing, but the hand on the steering wheel is shaking.
Half of her wants to stop, but the other doesn't. She presses further, "Not bad? I'd say I hit the nail on the head."
His head tilts slightly back to look at her and the mirth in his eyes goes away. He puts the truck in park and puts on the emergency brake. He takes a deep breath. "To speak plainly, you're a lonely therapist who barely has a life outside of her job. When I first went to the session I thought you were just innocent, being uncomfortable with any display of affection. But that wasn't it. You truly wanted us to get divorced, as Mui was acting as if she were in an affair. Which, by the way, is quite sick. Counseling a couple in marriage and yet wish the two people never reconcile. You must have a very twisted mind to wish ill upon people you want to help."
Her eyes go wide at his words. It takes her second but she gathers her thoughts quickly. "I did want you two to reconcile," she replies. "I sent you to the other therapist because I knew it wasn't within my skill to do so." Before he can try to counter her, she continues, "But that wasn't because I liked Mui. In fact, I hated her. But you were so nice and kind I thought that you'd be happier that way." Her lips thin out and her eyes darken. She takes the only blade she has and uses it, "But your not so nice or kind; you probably deserve her leaving you."
The knuckles on his hand are white at the force of his grip. His eyes narrow, "Do you really believe you can help anyone? I mean, how can you help anyone when you can barely help yourself. Take a good look in the mirror, you're mess. You scream in your sleep, if you sleep at all. You deny that anything is wrong."
He'd asked the one question that had been on her mind for the past two weeks. She expects him to end snorting, or his voice tilting in a sneering tone; but his face was strangely void of emotion and his tone was level. It did not lessen the sting of the words though, in fact, she would prefered he'd laughed. Instead, it made it hard to miss how much truth he'd gathered from her; how easy she was to read. Her body felt like a tense coil; she wanted to run, far away from here.
Her eyes flicker to the window, and he touches her cheek, making her look into his eyes.
"Aren't we malicious?" he asks. "Humans in general. So filled with evil." He looks tired. The bags under his eyes more pronounced than usual.
It is then she realizes what she has done. How horrible she has acted, regardless of his actions towards her; she should have been more respectable. She is a therapist because she is supposed to help people, not hurt them. She is supposed to be professional, but she feels anything but. Before she can stop herself, tears drip from her eyes. "I'm sorry."
His eyes soften, "So am I."
"You didn't deserve it. Mui didn't leave you because of-"
"I know why she left me," he cuts her short. He releases the steering wheel and he rakes his hair back with it. He sighs at the expression on her face. "You don't need to feel guilty. We are both on good terms, in fact she's coming back to visit soon. We are much better friends than we were spouses."
He turns back to staring at the road and begins driving again. There is a moment of silence before he begins talking, "The only reason you're doubting yourself as a therapist is because you were shot by that woman. It's a good thing she lost custody, in my opinion, your client could have been on the other end of that gun eventually. Almost every review on your practice has been a five star rating; you do help people, Sakura, do not doubt yourself there."
His lips tilted up then at seeing her relax, "But, about being lonely. You need to fix that, at least get out of the house more. It's not good to stay cooped up every weekend."
Sakura's eyes narrow, honing in on the exactness of his facts. "How do you know so much about me?"
He smiles for real then, glancing at her through the corner of his eyes. "I own a private investigation service. I sent out a couple of trainees to look into you. I've been too busy lately to stalk you myself."
"Seriously?" She laughs awkwardly at the last statement.
He shifts and pulls out his wallet and gives it to her. "The card under my driver's license is my private detective license, and on the right are business cards."
She pulls out one of the cards and looks it over. It definitely was a PI business, she'd seen the place on her way to work, although she'd never known anybody to use it. "Mind if I take a card?" she asks, wanting to validate his claim of owning the place.
"Go right ahead. I'll send you my license and certification if you'd like as well," he says, knowing her true intent.
"If you're offering," she replies, not backing down.
He gives a short laugh, "Very well then."
As they continue down the mountain, the conversation becomes easier. At some point Sakura realizes she has mostly forgiven the man, not quite but mostly. Most of it she attributes to being allowed to tell him off. She is still angry, but she has come to the conclusion that the man had confessed the truth due to a guilty conscience. The reason for the guilt, probably was either they were closer to being friends or he was still upset about her being shot. The latter was likelier; he probably wanted her to know the truth of his actions; he hadn't come to her house to hurt her or himself, only to make a statement which was why the gun had been empty.
She frowns slightly at that thought, that had been an elaborate show for something that seemed so trivial. In fact, the gun was perhaps the scariest notion now that she has more time to think about it. Who went to someone's house with a gun, just to make a point to a sibling? Sure she didn't have one, but it seemed drastic. She hopes he has learned his lesson. She touches her shoulder, it is still sore.
She finally rests her head against the pane of the glass window, listening to Madara talk about each of the birds like they were his children as they continue to drive.
Madara keeps his word. He does get her home safe, and a week later, she finds an envelope with copies of his licenses, both business and private detective. She follows up, of course, calling the correct state departments and verifying that the information is real. It is.
The long trip did not help much, she inevitably has ended up back where she started. She has gained a slim amount of courage with buying and installing several deadbolts, movement activated lights and a taser. But sleep is still evasive.
No Uchiha comes to visit after he leaves. No Mikoto to give an apology; no Sasuke, who'd gotten back together with his old girlfriend. January ends with snow drifting to the lower land, covering her world in a blanket of white.
Last Edit: 7/28/22