"To the Rintaro that will replace me,
Well, I find it pretty hard to write this even though I grew used to writing to myself countless times. However, this is my first time writing to a version of me that comes from the future and, in the end, will end up taking my place. I have all rights to assume that you'll be coming before 2036 finishes so I should get this out of the way now.
I'd like to start off by thanking you for what you did for me back in 2010. Without your encouragement I wouldn't have been able to save Kurisu; when the whole world and fate itself seemed like it was against me, it was your D-Movie that spurred me on once more. So, thank you. Thank you for the guidance you gave me to save Kurisu. If it weren't for you, her and I wouldn't be happily married now, I hope you get to enjoy some of that happiness too, I wouldn't know how to be able to handle living without Kurisu as long as you did.
Anyway, welcome to the Steins Gate worldline. I wouldn't know when you'd jump into this worldline and I hope this letter was the first thing to welcome you here. If it wasn't, then I'm sorry I hid it in a place that made it harder to find first. You did it, or rather, we did it. Your plan worked to perfection, I was able to save Kurisu and prevent World War III from ever happening and this is the worldline that was born as a result. I've done my best to keep the worldline as it is, but there's just no rest for the weary I suppose. Even so, it seems like this worldline still has the best chance for peace and freedom. While the Alpha Attractor Field dealt with SERN's dictatorship and the Beta Attractor Field dealt with World War III, there was another Attractor Field that I learned of in my time here.
Yes, there have been some hiccups that I've had to correct throughout the time that Steins Gate has been open, it is the most unstable worldline because of how it rests between the Alpha and Beta Attractor Fields, but there's one other Attractor Field that Steins Gate is nestled under. This Attractor Field felt oddly familiar to the Alpha worldline, but it was wrong in so many ways. While this isn't the only time the existence of Steins Gate has been threatened, this worldline will always be the one that I wish I never have to revisit.
In the year 2020, we were knocked out of the Steins Gate worldline and into an unknown. Luckily for me, I was able to build the trusty divergence meter well before the worldline shift and set this worldline's divergence number: 1.048596. Using my knowledge I rebuilt the divergence meter to have it show a number that would most likely be unfamiliar to you as well: 2.53027. If I had to be honest with you, this worldline was worse than the Alpha worldline. This worldline, the Gamma worldline as I'd like to call it, has me, us, working for SERN. We were the ones that stormed the lab to take the time machine, but we never had to kill Mayuri, she had problems with her health already and she ended up passing away at the same time as she did in the Alpha worldline.
How did I know all this? Well, I time-leaped of course. I time-leaped so many times, forcing Kurisu to build the machine to my specifications each time, just to be able to catch my bearings and figure out what went wrong for this worldline. It was hard, in this worldline, the version of myself that I replaced, he was far different from me. Cheap jokes about the fact that we had different tastes aside, my interactions with the lab members in 2010, they all pointed to the fact that this man was much colder and more disconnected from the lab than he should have been. It was in my inquiries that I found out that in this worldline, Y2K did indeed happen, thus forcing everyone's personalities and relationships to me shift enough to make me unfamiliar with all of them. This is also how I realized the cause of the worldline shift, someone from within SERN managed to figure out time travel and sent something back in time to ensure that Y2K happened.
Well, I had to go the long way for this one. I had to relive kidnapping Daru and Kurisu as well as the aftermath of it, I knew I couldn't break from the usual unless I wanted to be caught and have the chance to reopen Steins Gate slip by me. It was tough, and to tell you the truth, I don't know how I managed to pull through while the one I loved absolutely hated me. But I did anyway, I slipped back into 2020 and was able to properly go about trying to fix the mess that SERN had created. I used my knowledge in brain science to rejoin Victor Chondria while still working as a Rounder for that damned place. It was also here that I learned a terrible truth about Victor Chondria itself.
The Committee of 300. The Organization in our delusions. They have their fingers entrenched in Victor Chondria and I doubt that it didn't just end in the Gamma worldline. Even though I still wasn't able to prove it in my time here, I'm sure Victor Chondria is still connected to the Committee in this worldline. Anyway, I found the root cause and fixed it, I wouldn't want to bore you with all the unimportant details, but I made my way back into the Steins Gate worldline and back in the arms of those I loved. I have reason to believe that we were born from that worldline though. I have no proof to back it up, but I have a hunch that we originated from that worldline and our powers as the Observer are somehow connected to it.
So, back to Steins Gate. While it's peaceful in its looks, I have to do a lot of work behind the scenes to ensure that it stays peaceful. Not even the year before, SERN had teamed up with the cyber-ghost of a dead scientist to try and bring about the end of the world by harnessing the power of the Sun's solar flares. In what could be described as the plot to a shounen series, giant robots were involved. There was a group of kids in Tanegashima that were caught in the center and it was up to us to be able to guide them to victory. Daru fashioned a sort of Augmented Reality weapon to be able to get rid of this cyber-ghost and dismantle the Committee's plans for world domination.
You would think we wouldn't have to work anymore after working so hard to escape the Alpha and Beta Attractor Fields, huh?
As for personal relationships, well, Kurisu is my wife now (as you could tell by the revelation in my first paragraph). I married her and we both decided to stay in America and work at Victor Chondria University while leading the resistance against the Committee on the side. I'm a neuroscientist in Victor Chondria's Institute of Neuroscience and a professor of Neurophysics 101 here. It's my job to keep finding perfect candidates to work at the Institute and the course is a perfect first-step to weed out the disinterested. As for Kurisu, she stays in the Institute experimenting as she has no want or need for public speaking, she thinks I'm a better fit for that role.
You may see a couple differences between the Kurisu that you're used to and the Kurisu before you now. I had her call me Okarin in order to make sure we weren't split up by Dr. Leskinen (big man has a soft heart for those in love), but it shouldn't have lasted as long as it has. That is, she truly means to call you Okarin even though Leskinen is gone and there's a reason for it. In the summer of 2031, Kurisu was kidnapped when she went to Akihabara for a seminar at ATF. I went with her to Japan of course, but she was kidnapped on her way to get things done early at the seminar while I stayed at the hotel and got some more sleep in. I will never forgive myself for allowing Kurisu to be taken from me and it's all thanks to Daru that I was able to get to her as quick as I did. He found her using all the cameras in Akihabara and tracked her to an abandoned alleyway that was closed due to an earthquake that had struck months prior. I couldn't notify the police because they'd have us arrested for hacking into Akihabara's system so you'd see why I chose to run in on my own. But, to be honest, none of those thoughts ran through my head. I just wanted to save my wife.
I caught the bastards trying to tear off Kurisu's clothing and I can never forget her cries for help while they slashed at her and violated her. I may have been outnumbered 3 to 1, but my time in the Gamma worldline taught me enough on how to fight and seeing my wife in that state was enough to send me over the edge. These guys were thugs, bastards that wanted to cause harm for the hell of it, they weren't connected to the Committee whatsoever, I'd know because I made sure to put them through the equivalent amount of pain that they had caused my wife. Kurisu and I ended up leaving them on the ground and chose to have Daru call in an anonymous tip later on to get them medical attention.
I love Kurisu, I honestly love her so much and it's only possible that I'm able to feel this way because of you, the version of me that went through the Beta Attractor Field without being able to feel her or talk to her as I have. I'm sure she'll be highly observant about the difference between us and you probably may have had to explain yourself before being able to read this letter. I'm sorry if you had to go through any difficulties with her before being able to read this letter if you have, she can be incredibily difficult to speak to when she lets her emotions take control, but that's a good thing about her now I guess. Even though she never went through any severe physical stress other than being cut and groped when she was kidnapped, it still left a lasting impression on her mind and she is the way she is now because of it.
Please don't be too hard on her. While she likes to show off as a strong woman, she has a lot of insecurities about herself and her work. If you do end up staying, I hope she ends up getting used to you. But don't force her, let her yell at you, let her hurt you in ways that don't prove fatal, she just needs to vent and in time she'll come around. She's still a tsundere even at 44-years-old, and she may be more susceptible to her feelings because of the ordeal she went through at that time. Please don't take it the wrong way if she insults you, that's just her way of coping.
I'm sure you re-read the "if you do end up staying" part multiple times now, but I assure you it's meant to be there. I'm writing this letter to you from one of Daru's hideouts in Japan on July 1st, 2036. After I finish I will store my memories in the servers at the hideout for safe-keeping in case my prediction comes true and you do end up overwriting me. Only Daru and I know of this plan, I couldn't let Kurisu in on it because she'd probably do something hasty if my time does ever come and I can't store my memories in Victor Chondria because the size of my brain data (the memories I hold from all the other worldlines and all those time jumps sure do take up a lot of space) might tip off the Committee.
You don't need to worry about Reading Steiner affecting the memories I'm storing, they're to remain completely static once they enter the servers so they can't change if you do ever overwrite me. I made special accomodations to ensure that Reading Steiner wouldn't be a factor, as a neuroscientist I find it to be one of my better experiments that I conducted on my own (with some help from Daru of course).
So, I'm giving you the choice Rintaro Okabe. You can take all the time you want (although I'd prefer you decide quickly and absolutely), but I leave the matter of my existence and your own up to you. It's a hard choice for sure, if you choose to bring me back then your memories would be deleted while mine are input back into our head thus making you cease to exist. But it works both ways, if you choose to take my place indefinitely, my existence would just be like a whisper in the wind thanks to the properties of Reading Steiner. I vowed to keep the Steins Gate worldline as it is and I won't back down. You vowed to open the Gate and you didn't back down from your own battles. This isn't me trying to justify why I should be the one to exist over you, but I'd like to get this point across.
I'm willing to fight this battle, I'm not going to let you down. You worked to bring about change, let me keep the world as you envisioned it. I've had recurring dreams of the Beta worldline that continued after I failed the first time. I've seen glimpses of the suffering you had to experience on that worldline, to see Mayuri disappear like she did that day; I could feel what it was like to be there thanks to how vivid the dreams were. Preserving this worldline, however, is a daunting task; one far more difficult than trying to reach it in the first place. I'm not going to lie to you, I've had to go on operations to free test subjects under the Committee, I've been forced to send good men and women on dangerous missions to stop SERN from achieving the dream of time travel, I'm forced to work against the clock because, in this worldline, there is no reset button. If you're willing to put the lives of hundreds of individuals around the globe who wish to stop the Committee in your hands then I'm not stopping you, but I tell you now, don't expect it to be a cakewalk.
If you decide to take my spot as the defender of Steins Gate then you can ask Daru for more information on our operations, he's My Favorite Right Arm after all. I told him to make sure to believe me if I ever start talking like I don't belong to this worldline anyway. If you choose to sacrifice yourself to bring me back to life, then tell Daru so that he can prepare your trip to Japan for the swap. But the choice belongs to you, the one who envisioned this worldline in the first place. You are the creator, and now you can either protect your creation or allow me to do it.
No matter what, I know you won't make the wrong choice. Since when am I one to make the wrong choice anyway?
El. Psy. Kongroo.
P.S: I'm writing this now that I'm back in America. So, as you know, I've placed this under my pillow with a bottle of pills that I've developed. This medication was designed to help control the constant memory overflow because of Reading Steiner, all you need to do is swallow one pill when you feel the memories are becoming too vidid and it will suppress them. Do try and take them within a minute though, I don't know about you but I've been known to lose control of myself and it's practically impossible to bring me back into a coherent state without them, I don't know how Kurisu manages to do it, but it's thanks to her that I'm able to survive some of my worst outbursts. HOWEVER, don't let anyone else even think about ingesting them. They work to suppress memories so unlike how it solves my problem with Reading Steiner, it induces amnesia for a prolonged amount of time. So I repeat, do not let any ordinary person even think about taking those pills, only we are capable of handling them properly. Anyway, good luck.
P.P.S: In case you were wondering, the divergence meter is in a wooden box placed underneath our bed. Please do take care of it, making one is a pain in the ass as it is, but you should know that already."
A/N: EXPOSITION DUMP...sorta. I said I'd get this next chapter out pretty quick didn't I? Well, hope you enjoyed getting to (somewhat) see through the eyes of our very own Steins;Gate Okabe. As you can probably tell by its inclusion in this chapter, I'm a really big fan of the Gamma worldline, and its potential to tell a really interesting story is really high. However, since we're talking about the Steins Gate worldline here, I did my best not to get too carried away with having him write about the Gamma worldline since all that matters is that he recalls his experience. Anyway, Chapter 6 shouldn't come out as quick as this one did merely because I'll be away over the weekend and I won't have my laptop with me to write. It should still be out within a week though. Thanks for reading!
-Quil