I do not own anything.

Poison Dove & Maelstrom Fox

Chapter 13 - Steam and Toxicity Pt.1

To untrained eyes, it was hard to see what was happening beyond flashes of light and explosive bursts of air and water. To trained eyes, it was quite a sight.

In spite of using the elemental often degraded for being slow and steady, Chokai had shown he could move quite fast. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact he was nothing more than a larger-than-average head composed of flesh and supernatural energies. One minute he was floating about in one position and the next he was in another, often with fist and even boulder-sized chunks of rock-hurling towards his target. Said target had steadily grown accustomed to the powerful attacks. Either with his fists or blades, he counterattacked resulting in hundreds of shards of rock and dirt spraying the surrounding landscape. All too often did the sound of heavy rock impacting the earth become standard, as did the ground itself splitting apart. Missing chunks and pieces been torn out by an unearthly power, such things had turned the once flat-field into a canyon-like territory dotted with rapid-forming lakes and small rivers.

Flashing about were the two reinforced chain blades that sundered the harden stone as if it were paper, most of the time anyway.

Evasion was just as useful as deflection, and the blonde-haired ninja showed he had learned the skill well. He moved fast with his every step, already pre-planned. Focused and alert, his blue eyes watched each projectile come his way and responded with the appropriate action. For the rocks it was either being cut to pieces or outright dodged, the water was a somewhat different and more complex issue to tackle.

Teshio had gone easy on Naruto at first. With his reaction speed too slow, he found himself doused by streams of ice-cold water that often left him a chattering wreck on the ground. Quickly, he always got to his feet and rebounded. Truthfully, it wasn't all that different from the few water balloon fights he'd gotten into with his friends, at first anyway. Once it became clear he could dodge most attacks efficiently, Teshio stepped up her game by putting more pressure into each blast. Naruto merely grimaced as he watched the pressurized water balls shatter rock where he'd once been standing or kneeling. A direct hit and he wouldn't just be wet, he'd be nursing a hurting body.

"Don't just dodge them!" Shouted his Servant from the sidelines. "Your Kitsune-ken possess poison and toxic chemicals in them! Use that effect and you'll actually get somewhere!"

A boulder three times as large as himself and a water blast just as big came his way. Twisting on his heel, the blond felt his fight or flight instinct activate, he chose to fight. Gripping the two weapons tightly, he swung them forward in horizontal arcs. The edges of the weapons burned a bright orange that sickled and cackled once they made contact with the incoming attack. Steam erupted from the watery bullet while the stony projectile melted. A second passed, and the two attacks had been completely negated. Naruto recalled the chained kunai blades with a growing smile on his face.

"You know, I was always a bit scared of the fact you made these things poisonous." Called the whisker-faced teen. "Now, not so much!"

"It's not like I…never mind." Chuckled Semiramis before turning serious. "Chokai, Teshio, step it up a notch! Give him no slack, and Naruto, give no quarter to either of them!"

The Ōkubi looked to the long-haired Servant with dry stares. "You aren't still mad at us for accidentally getting dirt and mud in your hair, are you, Lady Semiramis?"

An involuntarily eye-twitch told them yes. "Why of course not, I know it was a mere accident during training, nothing at all to be angry over."

"She's still angry and wants me to punish you guys." Naruto concluded with a shrug of his shoulders before taking a combat stance. "Alright, guys, hit me with your best shot!"

Little time was wasted in following their summoner's command. Chokai's eyes glowed bright brown while his fanged jaws opened in a frightening roar. From the front came a literal wave of ever-rising stone. For a split second, Naruto thought of evading, but he stood his ground with his weapons held firmly in hand. Orange light burned from the dark metal, it erupted once they were set free from the human's palms and send directly into the oncoming rock wave. A grin formed on the teen's face as he watched the stony blast dissolve into orange-tinted smoke and rumble. His victory was short lived as a shadow loomed over him, what came next was the feel of an ice-world being dumped on him, and a ten lead weights being thrown at him.

Disoriented, he was a sitting duck for Chokai, who commanded the earth to rise up in the shape of a face which slammed into his gut with brutal strength. It didn't end there; a fist became an open palm that carried him into the air while squeezing his body like a vice grip. Naruto could taste blood in his mouth, acting fast he plunged one of his blades into the stony armor while pouring all his chakra into it. There was a sizzling sound followed by cracking then the rocky limb broke apart, a mixture of cracks and acid burns eating away at the fragments. Looking upward, he saw a trio of watery bullets heading his way; regaining an internal sense of balance, he swung both weapons outward intercepting the attack. Steam boomed from the interaction of the blade and the water. Even as his feet hit the ground, Naruto readied his body for the next attack.

What came was a laser beam composed of pressurized water. He'd seen Teshio's "water cutter" as she'd called it, a beam of fast-moving water that could cut through rock and people with frightening ease. Again, the sensible thing would have been to run away, but Naruto decided to do the stop thing. The whole of his Kitsune-ken hummed with orange light. Bringing them up in a cross shape, he braced himself as the water beam came upon him. His ears buzzed with the sound of water being evaporated while his arms groaned in slight protest at the pressure they were being put under. He knew he couldn't keep this up forever, especially with Chokai getting ready to move in.

A literal cloud of steam and orange-tinted wind exploded from the point of contact between the blades and the water beam. Teshio ceased her attack, knowing if she didn't then there would be consequences, namely her getting another gash to the face. Naruto's caution proved founded as barely a heartbeat later, the second Ōkubi burst through the ground; Chokai's body covered in a dirt brown rocky exterior that Naruto had the displeasure of going up against. The task of breaking it was hard, but not impossible, especially once he set his mind to it.

His right blade swung outward, creating a deep gash along Chokai's forehead, the demon head continued to press forward in spite of the sizzling pain. Though he stumbled, he regained his bearings and aimed his horns directly at his opponent. The young shinobi stood firm and held out his blades, stopping the charge attack dead in its tracks. Naruto's feet dug into the soil as Chokai put forth all of his supernatural power into running him down, yet he stood firm as a mountain against the demonic head. Bloody red met determined blue in a clash of wills. Though focused on the deadlock, Chokai couldn't help but smile inside at what he saw - pure determination, the likes of which he hadn't seen in what felt like ages. That determination manifested in the blades which exuded a bright orange-tinted glow. Snarling in pain, Chokai broke off and reverted all of his chakra to his horns in order to stave off the acid currently eating through his rocky armor and into his body.

The Kitsune-ken were quickly moved in the opposite direction, the blades parallel to one another. From them came reddish-orange arc-shaped projectiles that collided with the incoming jet of water. Cutting through the explosion of steam were two more projectiles aimed directly at Teshio. Two compressed blasts of water left her mouth, canceling out the attacks. She didn't wait for the resulting steam cloud to clear, she went straight for the attack with another beam of water that split the ground where the blond had once been standing. Instead of the Kitsune-ken, a set of kunai and shuriken were in his hands; they glowed deep blue before he threw them directly at her. Teshio reformed the water cutter into an axe-like blade which held in place by her mouth. A quick three-sixty spin and the empowered projectiles been knocked off to different directions.

Chokai came in just in time to stop the teen's frantic running. Naruto merely cursed as his feet unexpectedly sunk into the ground, which crumbled inward beneath him. Seeing the horned Ōkubi heading straight for him with its horns at the ready, Naruto merely closed his eyes and focused as he slammed both blades into the ground. The right blade grew brighter, a second later and Naruto jerked his arm upward, sending a five-foot wave of blazing chakra directly toward his opponent. He grinned in seeing Chokai continue to charge headlong into the attack, confident he could weather it.

Seconds before the two made contact, the energy slash exploded into an orange mist which washed over the dark-skinned demon head. A cry of shock went out as the demon head felt its eyes begin to burn. In the short window of time that followed, one of the chained blades wrapped itself around Chokai's horn; all he could do was cry out in alarm as he lost control of his body and was hurled through the air directly into his sister. With the speed and force behind the swing, Teshio was dazed and hurt, an act that made him hate himself for. His concern was short lived as he felt something powerful yank him by the horns and began to pull him in a certain direction. Cracking his eyes open, he was greeted to quite a sight.

"Rasengan!"

Four times since committing themselves to the blond genin had Chokai been hit with his signature jutsu. He had to admit, the attack lived up to its boasting, and Naruto had developed quite a number of ways to use it. Screaming in open agony, the red-colored Ōkubi was sent soaring backwards, eventually skidding across the ground leaving a trail before coming to a stop. Painful as the attack had been, it wasn't enough to keep him down. Teshio had recovered well and moved alongside her brother, ready to meet their master and his shadow clone in battle again.

"Enough, that's good enough for one day."

Immediately, the tension left all the combatants. Three sets of eyes looked to the approaching dark-haired Servant; her arms were crossed and though she wasn't smiling, they could sense an aura of approval surrounding her. "Naruto, using the constant steam and smoke created from your attacks as cover to create a shadow clone was a good idea. Even better, you managed to hide the clone underground and keep Chokai focused on you so that he never noticed it. Perhaps better than that." Raising her hand upward, she magically called forth the Kitsune-ken, a thin yet notable smile formed on her lips. "Finally, you're making proper use of my dear creations. Well done."

"I could have done it fast if you'd just told me what they could do." Grumbled the blond, even though his smile and voice told her he was joking.

Semiramis returned the gesture by returning the weapons to him. Beside him, the clone puffed out of existence. "Where'd be the fun in that. This is your training mission, not mine. All I and the heads had to do is to push you where and when you're needed. Speaking of which, Chokai, Teshio," She'd be lying if she didn't say that she enjoyed the way the Ōkubi bowed to her when she addressed them. It was nice stroking of her ego; an innocently little urge she'd held onto. "You did well in today's session. Any injuries or lingering effects of poisons I will deal with."

"You have our thanks, Lady Semiramis."

"You enjoy that, don't you?"

Semiramis smirked at her Master. "Enjoy what?"

The blond ninja merely rolled his eyes, causing her to chuckle. It was nice to see this softer and gentler side of the Assassin, it was a far cry from the secretive and mysterious woman he'd accidentally summoned into the world going on over three months ago. His gaze flickered to his newly gained summonings. Chokai and Teshio took immediate notice of him and the concern in his eyes. Sympathy showed in their expressions as they floated toward Naruto, their heads still hung low in a bow of respect showing they held no ill will for the injuries they sustained while taking part in his training.

"You know, if you're gonna become Hokage someday, you're gonna have to get used to people bowing to you and showing you gratitude." Came the jubilant voice of the genin's mentor.

"I'd say he's due some slack. Besides, a little humility never hurts." Giggled a female voice that had Naruto blushing in a light pink color.

As far as royalty went, Semiramis was willing to say Tsukino ranked rather highly on the list. Or perhaps that was simply because she hadn't met that many of noble birth or some high-standing position save for her Master. The dark-skinned woman certainly had the compassion needed to rule, though Semiramis worried if she had the iron will and backbone required to make tough decisions. Semiramis pushed such thoughts to the back of her mind as she made her way over to Chokai and Teshio to begin their healing process.

"It seems taking these two in has proven to be quite the idea." Jiraiya noted, coming up upon her.

"Yes, I suppose even fools can have a bright idea every once in a while." Her gaze flickered over to Naruto, who was being treated by the white-haired daughter of the village head. "You must have noticed it, he was holding back."

"Well of course he was, this is a sparring match, not a death match. Besides, he's grown rather fond of these two." Laughed the sage. Somewhat surprisingly, Chokai and Teshio blushed in spite of their oddly colored skin. Semiramis found it a bit amusing that such creatures were capable of being flattered with serene words. "Next time, do you plan on personally sparring with him?"

"No, there are other things for me to do while we're staying here."

"Such as?" Jiraiya inquired with a raised eyebrow.

In her hand floated all the toxic liquids and substances that had seeped into the Ōkubi during their sparring match with the blond jinchūriki. It might have simply been the light cast by the setting sun, but Jiraiya could have sworn that the watery sphere glowed, bathed in the eerie light was Semiramis' smile. One look at her expression and most people would have taken to the heels running. "This village, while it may be small, it's remarkably well supplied. Paralysis, fever, a state of ever-lasting shock, or death in an incredibly long and painful way. Oh, this village hidden beneath the moon contains quite a number of things to be enjoyed. Truly, Jiraiya, you made the right decision in having us stop here. For once, well done."

Placing his hands on his hips, he looked back to his student and Tsukino. They certainly seemed to be enjoying the little break while Semiramis seemed vastly interested in judging the effects of her latest patch of poisons and toxins. Chokai and Teshio were rather forthcoming about its effects while they were battling their summoner and Master. Turning back to the face the sunset just beyond the mountains, he couldn't help but whistle. Things came along rather nicely this time around. Now the question is, how long will our luck hold out? Ever since that run-in with Kumo's rogues, we've had a safe and easy run, but now, why am I feeling like we're about to step on the tiger's tail?

At the very least Semiramis had given him almost an hour or two to think he'd hidden himself well. She supposed for all the hard work and training she'd give him that false praise, especially since Naruto had returned the favor by not disturbing her. It was a rather nice change-up from their earlier encounters when he'd barge in unaccounted doing her poison concocting and studies.

"Naruto, you can come out now. I promise I'm not working with anything too lethal. Oh, and mind the smell, for a normal human it might be a bit strong so I apologize."

The sliding screen door slide opened, revealing the black-shirted teenager. "Um, actually, I've kind of gotten used to it."

That caught her off-guard a little as evident by the eyebrow she raised upon turning around. "Really? Then you're getting better."

"Couldn't you have just watched me fight Chokai, Teshio, your boney-"

"They're Dragon-Tooth Warriors."

"Whatever." Both of them rolled their eyes at his brushing off of official titles. Before, Semiramis would have been slightly annoyed, but now not so much. She'd certainly made the most of the spacious room in the guest house they'd been offered. The Toad Sage truly had not been kidding when he said that the Village Hidden Beneath the Moon treated visitors with the utmost respect. Semiramis certainly took full advantage of that hospitality to turn almost an entire room of their guest house into a laboratory. Honestly, it made Naruto wonder how she'd react to his apartment back home. It wasn't exactly spacious, and the idea of turning a portion of it into a lab where dangerous poisons and chemicals were cooked up…well, he already got a few complaints from the neighbors about being too noisy.

Granted, something told him the first person to knock on his door would meet his slit-eyed female companion. He could only hope he was there to keep her from killing the person on the spot, or using them as a test subject.

Before her atop a polished wooden table lay a familiar set of beakers and containers, in them were a variety of liquid substances Naruto dared not think about for fear of him getting sick. "Are you angry that I held back today during training?" He finally broke the ice, sitting about a foot behind her, careful not to do anything to break her concentration.

"…As Jiraiya said, it was a sparring match, not a real life or death battle." She sighed. "Besides, I'm glad you got more use out of the Kitsune-ken's poison functions. I made them specifically for the purpose of crippling and killing in mind. The issue from what I've gathered is you're shy to use them, and I believe I might be the reason for that." Her hands sat down the two vials as she turned to give the blond a sideways stare. "You see me, ruthlessly kill and use my chains for whatever I please, and I…believe it gives a bad impression, doesn't it?"

"N-No! It's just I see what you can do and I…well…" His hand went to his head as he tried to find the right way to explain his feelings. Talking to her had gotten easier in some aspects, and in others rather difficult. He wished someone like his sensei or Kakashi were with him. "Do you think it's stupid that I…I…I guess it's just I'm scared. The more I use the Kitsune-ken, the better I can get but I'm…I don't want to make a mistake and accidentally hurt someone I don't want to."

The Assyrian woman stared long at her Master without saying a word. Eventually, she turned completely around so she could face him. Whenever she looked to Naruto with that stern yet emotionless look on her face, he felt a mixture of awe and worry. Those were the times he remembered that his Servant was half-goddess thus he chalked up to some supernatural power she must have possessed. "You understand just how dangerous it is a power you have, and you fear it. Naruto," Her eyes slid shut and her hands fell upon her lap. "That is…actually good, because you fear that power, you have respect for it and caution when using it. If you went around flailing them about like a madman, then I'd gladly take the weapons away and not give them back until you learned some humility and caution."

"S-Seriously?" He seemed both happy and a bit scared at the same time.

"Quite, those who wield great power will either use it correctly or let it go to their heads. I can't begin to tell you how many legends in my world ended as a result of arrogance and overconfidence. It's incredibly pathetic to witness." Pipping one eye open, he jumped. The analytical light of her copper-colored orb was like a magnifying glass looking over every corner of his being. "Aside from that, you were fighting allies today, put you in front of an enemy and I believe you won't have nearly as much hesitation. I've seen enough of your memories to know when the time comes, you're willing to do what must be done, most of the time anyway. Luckily for you, I'm now here."

"You're making it sound like all I'm going to do is dump all the hard stuff on you." Grumbled the teen, crossing his legs and arms. Behind her stoic façade, Semiramis chuckled a little seeing a pouty child in place of her Master. "I am a ninja you know, and I know that means doing some pretty shady things. Not to mention have you seen who I travel with?"

"Oh please, don't remind me that toad-loving buffoon. Speaking of which, where is he?"

"Getting ready for some trip or something. That's actually why I came here." Naruto explained. "See, since Pervy Sage said he has some business that needs to be taken care of-"

"And you believe him?" Semiramis inquired with a raised eyebrow.

He held up his heads with a blank expression on his face. "Hey, I looked at his face and could tell this was one of those times when he was being serious. Anyways, he said while he's gone, Tsukino would be looking after us."

Semiramis stared at him with a drool stare of her own before lowering her head. "I see, so me and Tsukino will be watching over you while he's gone. Understandable and doable."

Naturally, he erupted. "Hey! I can look after myself! It's not like I need baby-wait, you're laughing." The grin that broke out along his face was ear-to-ear. Semiramis didn't mind letting him see her amused, he'd seen her smile and even laugh before, and he seemed to like it. "So, does that mean you'll come see the moonflowers with me and Tsukino tomorrow?"

"Moonflowers?"

"Yeah, remember? This village's famous flowers said only to grow under the moonlight? It's half the reason we…" For the first time, Naruto seemed to take notice of the fact the room was filled with a mixture of materials and plants that had no doubt been gathered from around Tsukigakure. In particular, his nose picked up familiar scents he'd first noticed while walking around the village and the surrounding mountains. "They're not poisonous and can't be used in making some weirdo-acid."

Now it was her turn to be defensive. "I can appreciate plant life that isn't poisonous or can be used to make a lethal concoction. It's just I've been so caught up in my work that I-"

"That's all the more reason to go see them with us! Come on, it'll be great!" He exclaimed with eyes on the verge of becoming stars.

Even though it was futile, Semiramis tried to put up some resistance. "You'll keep pestering me all night until I say yes, won't you?"

"Pretty much." Naruto grinned, throwing his hands behind his head.

"Then yes, I'll go see the moonflowers with you and Tsukino, but training tomorrow comes first." She then gestured her hands. The blond immediately picked up on her intentions upon holding out her hands. Materializing in his hands were the Kitsune-ken, and into her hands they went. "I'm going to make some more modifications to them, perhaps I can find a way to make it so one of them can be substituted for a shadow clone when making a Rasengan. Creating a clone and using it to balance out the chakra, it can get tiresome, not to mention predictable."

"Um, no offense, but that sounds like it'd be more of a thing for me to sort out." Noted the blond ninja. Something told Semiramis that he'd been expecting this question. "See, using shadow clones have kind of become second-nature to me, plus if something goes wrong, I've got a backup me ready."

Alright, she had to give him a point there. "Regardless, I believe the attempt is still worth it. Besides, the more usage you can get out of these blades, the better."

"I'd say I've gotten pretty good use out of the blades so far."

Shrugging in approval, Semiramis examined the two weapons with analytical eyes. Watching her, Naruto could only wonder what Tenten would have had to say about the Kitsune-ken; if he had to guess, Neji and Lee would have had to hold her back to keep her from injuring herself while examining them. Knowing her, she also requests Semiramis to either teach her or ask her for a few weapons for herself to reverse engineer. Naruto shuddered a little thinking what the twin-bun-haired girl would do with so much as a breadcrumb.

"Did you ever have to…physically fight when you were alive?"

Semiramis was glad Naruto had grown a bit bolder in asking questions, even if he knew he wasn't going to get a straight answer. It helped that she herself had grown more comfortable with opening up to him, if only an inch or two by a time. "Personally, no, I never once engaged in what you could call true combat." Looking back at him, she smirked. "I had countless fools such as yourself for that." She was beginning to like that stupid grin he so often had on his face. Not that many people had ever looked at her in such a way and she felt obliged to return the favor. "Like any ruler, conflict is always a tool of last resort, or at least open conflict. If a matter can be settled quietly and quickly, then that is the route I will take it."

As expected, there was a notable pause before Naruto asked his next question, one he'd been holding off on vocalizing for a while. "So…how many times did you…do that?"

She stopped tending to the blades to face straight ahead, a feeling of hairs on the back of her neck rising. "If I answer you…would that change your opinion of me?"

"Nope. Why should it?"

With her back turned to him, Naruto couldn't see the thin upward tick of her lips. "Then know this, I did what I had to do to ensure the safety of my kingdom, just as I will do what I must to ensure your safety."

His blond head fell as he stared at the floor before flicking his gaze upward. "Alright, but…could you, well, I don't know…could you keep it at a level?" Semiramis finally looked back at him with a hard gaze that had him slowly breaking out into a sweat. "Look, I know you care about me-"

"As my Master, yes, yes I do."

Liar, it's something more than that.

Naruto ignored his inner demon and the Assassin's near automated response. Sucking in a quick breath, he placed his hands on his knees. He had a gut feeling how this conversation was going to go, but that wasn't going to stop him from trying. "All I'm asking is, you be a bit…um…discrete when dealing with people. As in I can understand you only looking out for me but-"

"Stop right there." Her voice hadn't risen an octave, it was simply so direct that Naruto immediately followed the request. "Are you asking for me to show mercy to those who'd do you harm?"

"Didn't you do that when we were fighting Chokai and Teshio, and when we ran into them that afternoon? All I'm asking is, you don't kill everyone that comes after me with some horrible poison or whatever. I don't want us leaving behind a trail of bodies everywhere we go." He finally explained.

The Assyrian's eyes narrowed. "Are you not a ninja? Death is your trade, is it not?"

"I know it is," He calmly yet passionately shot back, looking at her with an edge in his eyes. His shoulders sagged a bit as he tried to figure out the best way to explain himself. "It's just...like I said, I don't want to leave a trail of bodies behind me wherever I go. I…I decided a long time ago I wanted to do something different than that, that I could do better than that."

A familiar glimmer lit up his eyes, giving Semiramis reason to pause. Years of politicking taught her how to maintain an excellent poker face, it helped in studying those around her and uncovering their secrets so she knew who she was dealing with. While her eyes remained focused on his, her mental vision was drawn to the seal hidden beneath his t-shirt. How badly was his childhood colored over by that overgrown mammal? Did the people of his village really believe he had the potential to release it at any time to kill them all? In spite of having seen it for herself, Semiramis was still having trouble picturing this blond-haired fool willingly unleashing hell on those around him. No matter what, there was a part of her that simply couldn't see Naruto truly going berserk unless he was well and truly pushed to the edge. The more she thought about it, the more uncomfortable she became until she decided it was best to change topics. Even when focused, Naruto could be lead astray with the right word choice.

"You worry I will leave behind a trail of corpses, I assure you that is not a concern. After all, if I kill every foe we come across, who will I have to serve as test subjects for my creations?"

"What?!"

It was dark and a bit twisted, but she grinned at the frightened expression on his face. Naruto may not have been the sharpest man she'd met, but he was good at putting the pieces together when he saw enough of them. Most of the time anyway. "Yes, a handful that oppose us, I will not kill, especially if they prove as resilient as you. Just imagine what good test subjects they'll be? And it'll be all the better if their bodies contain ingredients that can be harvest and used to create new toxins and even potions. Ah!" She exclaimed, putting a finger to her chin. "The possibilities truly are endless."

Naruto gaped incredulously. "So you're saying you're going to keep a torture chamber with you?!"

"I'm a poisoner, Naruto, I practically am a walking torture device, especially for those who annoy me." Sweat was beginning to visibly pool across his face. As much as Semiramis was enjoying herself, she knew the fun had to come to an end. Tsukino would likely be worried if Naruto awoke the next morning pale as a ghost and constantly looking at her with a mixture of anxiety and horror. Not to mention after coming so far in their relationship, she'd prefer a step forward instead of backward. "However, as your Servant, I am willing to do as you requested and show mercy, but any enemy who poses too great of a threat I will handle."

"No, you won't." He fired back, taking a sterner stance before her. "We'll handle them, together. Got it?"

She managed to repress a groan, barely. "Naruto Uzumaki, some days I truly do not know what to make of you, and I don't know rather that should frighten me or intrigue me."

He retreated with a near proud expression on his face. "Good to know I've still got it! Back home, they called me the Number One Hyperactive Ninja for a reason!"

In all fairness, what came next was entirely his fault. "Jiraiya tells me the official title is actually Number One Hyperactive Knucklehead Ninja." Why did he give to leave such an opening for her?

"It's still an awesome title!"

"Yes, for a court jester, not to mention you wear the outlandish orange to go with it." Semiramis cracked with a smug smile.

Before her, the genin quietly steamed until an idea crossed his head. He'd probably get a dose of acid or something to the face, but it'd be worth it. "You know, you're the last one to talk about looking weird. I mean, there's your hair, which can drag along the ground collecting grass, dirt, bugs, and all other kinds of crap. Not to mention I've already lost track of how many kids have played with it when you weren't looking. Oh, and then there's your original outfit, which looked like something you'd wear to a stupid dance. Not at all the kind of look for a badass wise queen from who-knows-where." He huffed with eyes closed, but because of it, he had missed her bangs shadowed her eyes from the light and the twitches of her strained smile. He also didn't see her raising her hand as her smile turned almost demonic.

Deep within his reconstructed seal, the Nine-Tails snorted in partial amusement and disgust. On one hand, for once he actually agreed with his host. On the other, he still needed to know how to properly interact with women.

Such as knowing when to keep his mouth shut.

Sighing, he resigned himself to another night of diverting strength to his idiot of a host's body. He was certainly going to need the healing power.

"Oh! Oh…oh my." Repeated the future head of the Village Hidden Beneath the Moon with eyes wide and her mouth shaped into an "O" in awe. As her home held a time-honored tradition to treat all guests and travelers with respect and courtesy, Tsukino had gotten to know a wide range of people. That said, Naruto Uzumaki and his…partner Semiramis were certainly out of the ordinary. To say they were an odd pair would have been an understatement, yet they fit together quite well. Tsukino personally saw them as being the sun and moon respectively, and as she stood before their assigned guest house, that comparison seemed more appropriate than ever. It was said that the sun goddess and moon god went their separate ways after an argument that spiraled out of control. When they met, some said disaster would follow. Stepping into the guest house, Tsukino could believe that.

The smell was what hit her the hardest, arguably more so than the scratches, holes, and even burns on the walls. Yes, it made her skin crawl in ways that had Tsukino alert and ready for anything in spite of having full faith in Naruto and Semiramis. Actually, she was deeply troubled by her inability to sense either of them. Carefully, she took her first footsteps into the house and down to the short hallway, all her senses alert as she opened her mouth to call out.

"Tsukino, the kitchen if you will! I have already prepared breakfast for myself and Naruto, feel free to help yourself!"

Strangely, hearing the voice of the dark-haired woman didn't quite put her at ease. "A-Alright, c-c-coming." Attempting to regain an air of calmness, she made a quick right then walked through the short corridor that finally led her to the home kitchen. "O-O-Oh, I…um, Semiramis, Naruto, I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

The Servant raised her hand. "Worry not, as for the damages you see, I deeply apologize. You have my word, I will repair them and have Jiraiya pay for any inconveniences upon his return."

"N-N-N-No, it's fine." Stammered the dark-skinned kunoichi, taking a place at the table. Over the two days they'd stayed at the village, Tsukino had seen Semiramis handle nothing but beakers, vials, and poisonous materials like a master. Seeing a plate of rice balls and bowls of soup came across as a bit of a shock to her, at first anyway. Semiramis continued to eat just fine while she took hold of a single rice ball and examined it. Taking a cautious bite, she quickly took another, finding it didn't taste all that bad. "Forgive me, when I came in, I was assuming the worst that something had happened to either you or Naruto."

"Again, my apologies. Last night, things simply went a bit…wilder than one would have expected." Calmly waved off the older woman, taking a sip of her tea. "As I said, I will repair the damage done to the home so it is usable for the next guests after my associates and I take our leave."

"Semiramis, if it's not too much trouble, do you think you could teach me to perform the…pardon me, but you called it 'magecraft', correct?"

"Yes, well, I make no promises. Besides, I don't know much that doesn't involve poison or causing harm to another."

In spite of the somewhat tense mood, Tsukino giggled. "Yet you're claiming to use this same magecraft to fix damages down to the interior of this home and some of the furniture. In case you haven't noticed, I could use such things."

"Noted."

"Mmhphm."

Tsukino fixed the Assassin with a soft smile. "Semiramis, don't you think Naruto deserves a chance to enjoy breakfast as well?"

Still keeping her eyes shut, she threw her head back, her pointy-ears twitching. "Hm, you might be right, then again, I may just decide to have today's training be endurance testing. See how long he can last on an empty stomach and such, perhaps until lunch or even dinner."

"Mhhmpapahah!"

"Now that's just a bit cruel, don't you think?" Tsukino giggled. "Whatever he said last night, I'm sure it wasn't quite that bad. Sure, Naruto can be a bit goofy, but his heart is always in the right place."

"Hamph huy, tsuhmph."

Semiramis finally directed her gaze to her Master. Her bound and gagged Master who was still glaring at her. The same Master she'd spent all night chasing, capturing, then putting in chains that left him feeling numb from head to toe. And yet somehow, he'd found a way to fight the venom in the small barbs, though not for her lack of trying. Naruto's constant squirming and half-hearted attempts to break out of the restraints showed either his body was adapting faster than she'd expected, or she'd slacked off. Neither answer really bothered her that much. Snapping her fingers caused the black cloth tied around his mouth to disappear. In response, Naruto stared at her with a blank stare.

"Semi-chan, you're mean."

Tsukino burst into full laughter as the Servant crossed her arms and looked away with a haughty frown. "Since you haven't had much interaction with the fairer sex, I shall educate you. Rule one, never insult a woman's looks, especially if that woman possesses the capability to make your life hell."

"How about learning how to take what you dish out?" Naruto sarcastically remarked.

"Please you two!" Tsukino waved her hands frantically, trying to diffuse the conversation into civil manner with a nervous smile. "It's breakfast and they'll be plenty of time for you two to work out your spat on the training field!"

"Good point," Another snap of Semiramis' fingers and the chains dissipated. "Naruto, we're going to work extra hard today. That way, it'll make the flower viewing all the more special."

At first, he said nothing as he reached across the table snatch up a rice ball. Half of it was gone before he spoke again, and when it did, his voice had an edge to it. "You know, you're awful pushy for someone that said they never got into a personal fight before."

The daughter of the village head laughed again watching the Servant's face grow sour as she had no retort to him. Even so, Tsukino watched her inhale a quick breath and turn to him to press the argument further.

"LADY TSUKINO!"

Alerted by the shout, the normally peaceful and docile village heiress was on her feet with Semiramis and Naruto trailing close behind her, their expressions equally grave. The door slide opened revealing a tall and thin-skinned shinobi wearing a dark-gray chunin's vest. His short brown hair was matted with sweat and his dark blue eyes were wide with alarm. His legs wobbled where he stood showing he'd sprinted quite a distance to deliver the message. Said message more than likely wasn't anything good.

Showing she had the heart for leadership, Tsukino stepped forward and placed both hands on the shoulders of the panting ninja, looked straight at him with a serious expression. "Masaru, Masaru! I need you to calm down and tell me what happened. Is anyone hurt?"

"Y-Y-Yes! Um, a-actually no, w-well, no one from our village. It's just-" A quick glance in Semiramis' direction seemed to snap his mind into place. Not surprisingly considering the Assassin had that sort of…effect on people. "A-A man fell from the sky! I-I know that sounds strange but-"

"Take us there, now." The Assassin ordered, her beautiful face held cold yet stern glare while her lips were pressed in firm.

It was nice how Tsukino gave no protest to how assertive Semiramis could be at times. Naruto may not have known all that much about monarchs in spite of having spent a good deal around a few (good and bad), but something in his gut told him the white-haired girl looked up to his Servant. He certainly didn't blame her as while Semiramis had her rougher points, she sorta did live up the title of "Wise Queen". That said, she still respected Tsukino's authority as shown by her allowing the dark-skinned woman to take the lead. Naruto had a gut feeling it was a tactile decision as well, if anything happened Semiramis wouldn't hesitate to act.

Barely a minute later and they came to their destination - a thick crowd had formed around the supposed man from the sky. A few heads turned to find Tsukino and her entourage coming through and immediately parted ways for them. Well before they reached the center, Semiramis picked up the scent of blood, fresh. Her eyes immediately jumped to her Master, who caught her gaze and understood the seriousness in seconds. Their worries were confirmed when they came to the center.

Beside Tsukigakure's future leader lay a man, perhaps in his early to mid-thirties, a few feet from him lay a bird. A giant dead bird whose white feathers had been stained bright red with fresh blood. Similar colors dyed the man's chest and right leg and were forming into a puddle beneath him. Murmured whispers broke out as the villagers pointed at the injuries and torn clothing of the man.

"Someone, call the medical division, now!" Shouted Tsukino, attempting to cradle the man's head. Not just his body, but his black hair had been colored a darkening shade of crimson as well. Once it may have been tied up in a ponytail, but now it was sprawling out around him adding to the greasily image. His eyes just barely fluttered open, revealing pale green orbs that were rapidly losing the life in them. "H-Hey, if you can hear me, hang in there! Help's coming!"

The Servant's skin tingled when she felt the eyes of her Master fall upon her. All she did was give a short glance in his direction. A plea, not an order, a plea, yet another sign that Naruto was different than most magi from her world. Rejection should have been her first response, it wasn't. "Move aside, Tsukino, I'm not a medic but I'll do what I can to keep him from dying." And telling me what in the hell do I have to contend with this time! She got to work the second her knees touched down upon the ground. Healing Naruto's scrapes and bruises had been one thing as they'd never been life-threatening, this man's wounds on the other hand were out of her league. As she said, at the least she could keep this stranger alive until actual healers arrived. Green light illuminated her hands then spread to the rest of the man's body. Semiramis was a second away from beginning the healing process until she felt a jolt run up her spine.

Snapping her head up, she peered through the crowd for the source of the discomfort. To her right, she found it. "Naruto!"

Their mental link had gotten better as before she'd even finished speaking his name, the genin was moving. Half of a dozen shuriken came shooting out of the crowd only to be knocked down with one swing of the Kitsune-ken. Naruto saw them lose their disguises and their shadowy forms bolt towards Semiramis, Tsukino, and the mysterious ninja. His right hand reached back into his kunai pouch while he directed the left arm blade to snake towards the attackers.

One of them cried out in agony as he fell to the ground, clenching his leg in pain. The rest stood before the smoke screen, caution keeping them locked in place though ready to move at a moment's notice. Such a moment came when they spotted Naruto darting to the far right, shouting for the villagers to move as he sprinted forward. Lying on his back was the wounded ninja, half-conscious as evident by his hollow groans.

"If you guys want him, you'll have to catch me first!" Shouted the blond, bolting as fast as he could through the villager and its people. Oh man, I really hope we don't wear out our welcome with this! Past him flew several things, shuriken, rocks the size of his fist, and insults, yeah, plenty of insults. In turn, he shouted for the villagers to get out of the way as he ran, thankful, the earlier commotion seemed to have clued them in.

Do you have any idea where you're even going, idiot?

The outskirts of the village! Mentally shouted back the young shinobi. The ground beside his feet erupted, though not in an explosion but a collection of earthen spikes. Instinct jerked his body to the left where he felt a presence behind him.

"If you're smart squirt, you'll drop the corpse on your back and surrender." Barked a cold male voice.

Naturally, Naruto scoffed off his threat. "Or, you guys leave this village and I won't break all your teeth in."

The sound resembled metal twisting and hardening, all that he needed to hear to get his body moving. Sensing something, he looked ahead to find one of the invaders standing almost directly across from him. It was the first time he was able to get a good look at the assailants who'd invaded the Village Hidden Beneath the Moon. Brawly and shirtless beneath a pitch-black jonin vest, Naruto almost wished the man was wearing something over his body; then he wouldn't have had to look at something moving beneath the veins of the man's skin. For a minute, Naruto was reminded of Sasuke's Curse Mark, the comparison told him without a doubt what was coming next was going to be trouble.

Slamming the bottom of his palms together, the red lines focused and manifested into a metallic substance. In seconds, the metal condensed into a sphere that shot toward Naruto's chest. Cursing, the blond ninja spun his heel; he could feel the air part ways and a heat wave sonder his face as the metallic sphere continued onward. Where it ended up an explosion followed suit, blowing pieces of rock and wood all across the street.

Ooooh, we're SO going to have a lot to explain to Pervy Sage when he gets back! Jumping upward, he avoided another shot of the mysterious substance, but the danger hadn't yet passed. Snapping to his left, he saw what could only be described as a giant hammer heading his way. Naruto responded by swinging his left arm blade out to meet the attack, in response he left his right side exposed. He hissed in pain when he felt something hot and metallic loop around his ankle then yank him downward. As he hit the ground, his unlikely companion rolled over beside him, hacking and coughing from the strain.

"Pathetic, you thought you could outrun us while carrying another? Honestly, it's kids like you that leave me doubting the supposed superiority of the Five Great Nations."

Naruto did nothing but growl as the wounded man was pulled from his side and lifted by his throat by one of the invaders. He was at least two heads taller than Naruto with a well-cut goatee and mustache. Atop his face was a bandanna, Naruto didn't recognize the symbol on his headband. He stood at the head of a group of six men, all of whom were dressed in similar dark pants and black vests to him. Each and every last one of them looked at Naruto as if he were a piece of gum stuck to the bottom of their shoe. He hated it.

"You guys sure are talking big for a bunch of pricks who weren't able to finish the job the first time." Challenged the blond, getting to his feet.

"Hey, we caught what who we were after, didn't we?" Chuckled the leader, tightening his grip on the wounded stranger. "But that doesn't mean we're not going to take out the excess aggression on you."

Naruto couldn't help but chuckle as he crossed his arms. "You so sure about that?"

POOF!

"Gah!"

"What the-"

"You…You little shit!"

"Ah, that's no way to talk to a kid." Laughed the second Naruto, sticking out his tongue. The goateed man tightened his grip on the clone, causing it to poof out of existence before turning his glare back on Naruto.

"You guys didn't look awfully hard at that smoke screen. Talk about lousy." Bemoaned the teenager, throwing his arms behind his neck.

As he'd done last night, his words had awoken anger that was better left slumbering. Starting from the leader, the mysterious shinobi's bodies began to pulsate with red energy as he'd seen earlier. Naruto saw the substance moving through their veins followed by their bodies beginning to physically change. Peach and olive skin turned dark gray while others turned bloody red, speaking of red, their eyes gained a crimson tinge to them as well. Muscles bulged and canines sharpened, giving the men the look of beasts. Naruto took a cautious step back, the image of Mizuki after ingesting that secret potion from Orochimaru came to mind, and all the trouble it'd put him through.

"Kid," Barked the leader, raising his right hand. Before his eyes, Naruto watched a blood-like substance sip through his skin then harden into an outer coat his entire hand. What he was looking at was now a set of sharpening claws he had little doubt would rip the flesh off his body. "You've got ten seconds to tell us what we want to."

"Screw that!" Snapped the man beside the leader, raising his own fist, having transformed it into a mallet. "We go back, find that bitch who was healing him, kill her, the traitor, and anyone else that gets in our way!"

"Over my dead body!" Yelled Naruto, making a cross-shaped hand sign. "Shadow Clone-"

"Fire Style-Dance of the Crimson Destruction!"

He hadn't paid much mind to the house fire burning behind him, especially since he'd almost reached the goal of moving the coming fight to the edge of the village's interior where people wouldn't get hurt. When the flames suddenly roared and whipped out, Naruto turned his head back wondering what else he was going to have to deal with. What he saw were numerous flaming tendrils striking out and going straight for the attackers of Tsukigakure. The startled cries of the trackers caught Naruto completely off-guard, at least until the leader dashed through the flaming maelstrom coming straight for him.

Naruto readied himself to intercept, but someone else beat him to the punch.

Hehehe, well, well, well, who'd have thought I'd run into one of them HERE of all places.

He didn't have time to contemplate what his inner demon's words were as the ground before him split open, no, it erupted. Throwing his arms up, all Naruto could see was a massive red shadow rise upward from the earth. What came next was a monstrous explosion of steam and a groan of pain as his ears registered the sound of a fist connecting with a skull.

"Oh great, what the hell is going on now?!" The flames of the previously cast jutsu were still going strong, literally. Wide-eyed, Naruto watched as the assailants attempted to literally fight off the wildfires seemingly sticking to their bodies. Based on their screams of frustration and even horror, it was a losing battle. Quickly, he turned his head to the jutsu's caster, his mouth predictably went fell. "Woooah, you're…you're pretty big."

The newcomer's blood-red armor clanged as he turned to face the fourteen-year-year-old ninja. Despite the bottom side of his face was covered and he has no eyebrows, amusement showed in his light brown eyes. Naruto definitely recognized the insignia on his headband, that of the Hidden Stone Village. "You look like you could use a hand, mind if I jump in? I heard this village was known for its hospitality, but when I saw the explosions and heard the commotion I decided to do some investigating."

Breathing an invisible sigh of relief, Naruto grinned at the armored shinobi. "Help yourself!"

"You!" Both looked to their left to find the leader of the group had blown away the flames, albeit they'd left their mark on his body, which had turned from peach-colored to stony gray. Murderous fury blazed in the man's eyes, now tinged with red veins giving him a slightly deranged look. "You're going to pay for this, I swear it! Do you hear me, you armored freak!"

The newcomer cocked his head to the side, letting out a bone-cracking sound that satisfied him while it caused those around him feel intimidated or tensed, his right hand tucked inside his kimono. Then his eyes narrowed hard as was his voice. "Heard that before from the last guy who crossed me. Didn't do much, so let's see what you've got. I have some questions that need answers, and I'm not leaving until I get them."

For the record, Tsukino and Tsukigakure are somewhat canon, they're both from the Ultimate Ninja Heroes 3 game. I've got one more little adventure planned for Naruto and Semiramis before they can return to Leaf Village, one involving Han, who I won't lie, is one of my favorite Jinchūriki. It's a shame we never got to learn his story, but that's what fanfiction is for, isn't it?