Hey, everyone. I'm deeply sorry for the major schedule slippage as this chapter was supposed to come out all the way back at the end of August, and here we are going into mid-September. Then again, that means there's literally less than a week of the summer season left. Eh, what are you gonna do? As promised, this chapter is something of the transitional piece featuring the beach, swimsuits, and some character interaction and study so nothing too major.

I do not own anything.

Poison Dove & Maelstrom Fox

Chapter 19.5 - Seaside Bliss

"Are we there yet?"

A knot formed on the brow of the Servant whose spiritual form gave half-manifested at the side of the blond who'd just spoken. "Naruto, if you ask that question again, I will not be pleased."

Expectedly, the blonde's face became cross. "Oh, come on! It's only the third time I asked! The last time was almost an hour ago! Besides, I'm seriously wondering when the hell are we going to reach wherever it is we're going!?" His gaze shifted from the spectral entity to the white-haired man before him. For an answer, all he got was childish snickering. Times like this Naruto seriously wondered who in their little group were the adults; actually, he wondered which of them was the responsible one. Lately, he'd felt like the answer could be aimed at the one member who according to her, "wasn't truly alive". Some would have said that was the point when one should have begun worrying. For Naruto, this was practically standard though.

"Getting eager for a break? Well, don't you worry your pretty little head, we're almost there, Naruto." Proudly answered the white-haired sage, thumping his chest. "Once we get there, you'll see that all the walking was worth it. Hell, there's a good chance you may not want to leave once we get there!"

His words were met with a joint stare from the Master and Servant, who afterwards turned to one another. Just a second ago they'd been on the verge of bickering, but now they seemed to be on the same page. United by their common mistrust of the "adult" in their little group. It wasn't the first time they questioned his judgment, and it most certainly wouldn't be the last. In particular, his visible excitement was off-putting to both of them as they knew only a select few things would be enough to get the Toad Sage in such an upbeat mood.

Wherever they were going, it was going to have women, and plenty of them.

The only question was how many of them would get a crack at the old sage, and how many of his teeth would remain in his mouth by the time this little venture was over with.

Seeing their expressions, Jiraiya decided to make at least a small effort to ease their worries. "Hey, hey, remember when we left the Hidden Moon Village? If not my word, you'll at least take theirs. Right, Naruto?"

Semiramis wrinkled her nose at the way the sage directed his words primarily towards Naruto. Of course he would, not her blond Master wasn't capable. He was…impressionable, which was both a good and a bad thing. Then again, Semiramis had to step back and acknowledge that the bond between the two men was strong, even if they did bicker with one another. And the old sage often led them into one mess after another; Naruto was perfectly capable of finding trouble himself, and sometimes without even looking for it. This time though, the cause of her discontent was in recalling the conversation her Master had shared with the village's future leader. During their stay in the Hidden Moon Village, she couldn't help but notice the tight bond that had formed between her blond charge and Tsukino. Semiramis approved of it, yet now looking back, she couldn't help but feel some nagging sense of discomfort whenever she thought of the closeness the two shared.

It was rather obvious from what she could see that the dark-skinned girl had developed feelings of some degree for the whisker-faced blond.

Not that Semiramis could blame her.

…Wait a moment, what the…what the hell did I just…gah! Enough of this! Inwardly barked the Assassin. Naruto heard her mental frustration and reached out, but she wasn't in the mood to talk, especially to him about a matter that had him at the heart of it. Semiramis couldn't believe that she'd fallen into a position like this, and after they were still running high on a rather decent and well-earned victory, the liberation of an entire village. Speaking of the Vine Village, I'll find a quiet little place to set up shop and continue with my research. Hopefully, these two idiots will be able to stay out of trouble long enough for me to make sufficient gains.

So, you don't plan on relaxing with me or Pervy Sage?

The Heroic Spirit blinked. Wha-Naruto? What…what are you doing in here?! Foolish boy, this is my mind! Snapped the Assassin.

You were zoning out and I got a bit worried! Besides, you were getting this creepy look on your face and your chakra changed; it's like when we're in a fight and you're plotting some guy's murder or something! Can you blame me for freaking out a bit!? His emotions returned to normal as he physically heaved out a sight. You plan on working when we're supposed to be taking a break? That seems a little harsh, don't you think?

Naruto, Began the long-haired Servant, crossing her arms while floating alongside him. Arguably one of the highlights of his growth was his ability to accept her continued presence in spirit form. Or as he called it, 'ghosty form'; for some reason, she didn't have the heart to correct him. Or maybe she just didn't have the patience in knowing her correction would result in a long-drawn-out discussion she wouldn't win. If I mean to relax myself, I will take the time to. Besides, for me…indulging myself in my interests is how I relax. My interests just happen to include poisons and toxins that can range from annoying to extremely lethal. Be thankful I do not have access to any human guinea pigs save for…

Another sigh left the boy's lips. No, as annoying as he is, you can't use Pervy Sage as a guinea pig for any wacko potions you're gonna make.

Semiramis cocked her head, a mocking smile on her eerily beautiful face. Why Master, it sounds like you're implying I'll do something to horrifically maim the man or worse, kill him. Surely, you've come to trust me enough to believe I would never willing endanger the well-being of your teacher, and our…ahem, chaperon. Incompetent as he can be at times.

There was a pause in the human's thoughts, then came the snickers. Semiramis narrowed her eyes at the expression on his face. It didn't take any mind-reading to know what he was thinking, she just hoped Naruto would be smart enough to keep his thoughts from being vocalized. Maybe while I'm training, you can hang with Pervy Sage for a bit. Maybe learn a thing or two from him.

Now it was Semiramis' turn to laugh, though hers was far harsher and more condescending as befitting her personality. Me, learn something from that old pervert? Naruto, I must thank you for the laugh, it's made this journey somewhat more tolerable.

No problem! He returned, seemingly ignorant of the sarcasm that laced the Servant's voice. Besides, you learned the Substitution jutsu from him, didn't you? Sure, he can be a mega perv and a pain in the ass…but he's still a pretty good teacher, isn't he?

For the life of her, she wanted to strangle the boy, yet she also wanted to sit down with him and talk just to get to the bottom of what it was that made him so damn…enticing. It wasn't like she was going to admit that he had a point, hell would freeze over before that happened and Semiramis would allow the blood in her ice to freeze and scatter like dust. However, something told her that words weren't exactly necessary. You're an annoying boy…but I'll say this in your favor, your annoyance came to be amusing at times. I suppose some of it you picked up from that so-called sage. Be sure you don't turn out too much like him. Otherwise, Naruto, I may have to kill you.

Hey! Give me some credit! I've got better things to do than spend all my time staring at some chicks who won't even give me the time of day! Shot back the blond genin.

You know, there are times where it honestly surprises me you know the opposite sex exists. Coolly retorted the Assassin, twirling a lock of her hair in hand. As your Servant though, I believe it is my duty to instruct you. Who better than a queen, a far better instructor than that old pervert.

Er, no offense, but I think those are some lessons that I can do without. I'm interested in things that'll help me become Hokage, not something that's going to get me punched in the face or hammered into the ground. Naruto said in a nonchalant tone.

Semiramis couldn't help but laugh in amusement. Truly, still a child in every sense of the word. Naruto, eventually there will come a time when you must interact with the fairer sex, especially when the time for marriage comes. Do you wish to spend the rest of your life as a bachelor?

What's a bachelor? Sounds kinda cool!

First came the sweat-drop, then the Servant's hand met her forehead. Anu, have mercy on me. You've given me a real jagged lump to work with, and work with it I will have to do. Hm?

Naruto was going to further question his Servant, but he felt something that made his hair stand up on end. Together, the two looked ahead of them, finding themselves the center focus of a bemused stare from the Toad Sage himself, his arms crossed and his expression rather stony. They recognized the look to be one of annoyance, not an uncommon expression in their oddball group. While Semiramis wasn't actively visible, she knew her presence had been detected. Again, not that she would admit it, but Jiraiya possessed some considerable skill, especially in regards to the realms of the spiritual. Somewhat begrudgingly, she'd quietly admitted perhaps he might have had some aptitude in the ways of the sages like he claimed.

"What? What is it?" Naruto spoke up, feeling like he was in for a lecture.

"You two were talking about me just now, weren't you?" He asked in a deadbeat voice.

Fully materializing, Semiramis turned her head to the side, giving the white-haired man an aside glance. "Perhaps. You do give us much to talk about, both good and bad. You're more than welcome to guess which one it is we were just discussing."

At that point, it was a staring match between the oppositely colored "adults" of the trio, leaving Naruto as the middleman. And feeling left out. Granted, looking between the two something told the genin that it might have been wiser to keep his mouth shut and not say anything. He didn't fear a fight breaking out, at least not a serious one. Thankfully, they were beyond that. But that didn't mean that there wouldn't be a shot or two fired between the sage and the queen. Naruto wasn't sure why, but his teacher and Servant seemed to enjoy taking potshots at each other for no other reason than for the sheer hell of it.

You and the Uchiha did it all the time when you were younger. Don't know why you're having a tough time accepting these two doing it, or do you think what you two had was something extra special?

While the jinchūriki rolled his eyes, the Toad Sage eased up, a smile forming on his face. "Bah! Let's keep on going, we're almost there so let's not waste any more time!"

"Again, where in the hell are we going?" Naruto bemoaned.

"Anywhere it is, I believe it is a cause for concern since you're smiling and in such a happy mood." Echoed Semiramis, choosing to walk with the two males instead of returning to spirit form. "Take us there, and should I find that you've whisked us off to some casino or gambling town…then I will be procuring Naruto for some time."

"Huh?"

"Noticed it, huh?"

"Noticed what? Don't talk about me like I'm not here!" Decried the blond, only to be ignored by his two compatriots. "What's this about gambling? Pervy Sage, don't tell me that Granny's been-"

Jiraiya's face morphed into an ear-to-ear grin as his student's words died in his mouth. His spiritual companion's surprise was as open, but it was still there. Also, her eyes widened with shock then gradually began to crackle with amusement. Slowly, a soft smile formed on her face. In spite of all her earlier threats and predictions, it seemed she was going to take the moment to enjoy this latest rest stop. It would be foolish not to. The question was if she'd enjoy the downtime alongside her Master. A rather foolish question given the absolutely awe-struck light that had occupied the jinchūriki's blue eyes.

Said blue was reflected in the massive ocean that leisurely sat beside the sandy shore. Beyond the latter lay a loose collection of buildings, and beyond them a denser city packed with wood and steel-framed buildings. Further off lay a hilltop upon which a lighthouse stood. The trio stood near directly adjacent to it, gazing out across the sea-side town. From the hilltop upon they stood, they had a pretty good view of the surroundings. Urbanization and nature represented by the bright greenery that stood at the back of the village. Two rivers stretched through the forest and eventually connected to the sea. One branched off behind the lighthouse hill while the other branched out, moving closer to the trio. A glance downward and they saw a massive bridge that bridged the gap cut by the river. Said bridge was seeing quite a bit of activity, and possessed checkpoints.

Semiramis chuckled, already knowing slipping past them would be all too easy. Naruto, meanwhile, continued to stare at the sparkling water.

"Sweet! I can practice my surfing!"

"Surf…ing?" It was perhaps the first time all day that the female Servant expressed surprise at anything, and of course, the center of it was her Master. Immediately, she looked at Jiraiya, whose warm expression was surprisingly a sight that warmed her heart.

"When he was in the village, Tsunade let some of the genin off for a break, one of them involved them hitting up the beach. While the Land of Fire has some pretty good beach spots, there are some places that have them outclassed. By example, this place!" Proclaimed the toad sage, throwing his hand out. It was clear that this wasn't his first time visiting this seaside town, and he was rather happy to be returning to it. "Kurihara City, it was one of my favorite places to visit, especially when I could drag my teammates along with me. We actually had a mission here to root out a crime ring. Needless to say, it was a success."

"Which you've abused quite a bit I can see." Lightly jabbed the slit-eyed Assassin, a smirk on her face. "I will admit though, this won't be that bad a place to spend the next couple of days. I'm assuming you've made preparations so that we will have a place to stay?"

"I sent a messenger toad just as we were leaving the Hidden Moon Village, not to mention they put in a good word for us." Answered the Sannin. "Don't worry, I've covered our tracks a bit and I have some friends here who'll keep our presence as closely a guarded secret as they can. We should have at least a day or two of peace. Hopefully."

A haughty snort left her nose. "Not if Naruto has anything to say about it."

Finally, it dawned on the white-haired sage that their young charge was missing from in between them. Quickly, he looked down the path and saw Naruto racing down the road, his face brimming with excitement. So much so that he was inadvertently pushing a few people out of the way. Crying in alarm, the old ninja quickly took off after his godson, demanding for him to slow down and lesson to him.

Semiramis remained behind to observe the landscape. At the moment, she seemed less a spirit and more of a queen as she stood atop the hill, solitary and silent as hundreds, perhaps thousands of people bustling about beneath her. And yet, she was still a stranger, a foreign entity in this world. A part of her wondered if that feeling would ever vanish, not that it mattered to her. She wasn't a queen, she was a Servant, a tool; even if her Master adamantly denied that association.

Still, she couldn't help but feel like a real human being at times like this. It was looking like this was going to be one of those times.

Perhaps the Toad Sage had planned this out. He was less showy than his student, but at times she could see the concern in his eyes, concern that still lay mixed with caution regarding her existence. It was…honestly, she didn't know rather to keep her guard up or begin letting the old sage in just as she'd done for Naruto. Not that she'd intended for that to happen.

But as Semiramis had learned throughout her life, sometimes things didn't quite go as they were intended. For example, mothers were supposed to love and raise their children, yet she had been abandoned and left to be raised by others.

Her hand was raised out, fingers outstretched to the distant sea.

I can feel it…as if it were in the palm of my hands. Thought the child of a water goddess, Semiramis didn't consider her hydrokinetic abilities to be anything too impressive. At least not when compared to the likes of Ea and Triton and Ao Bing. She could control the water, but to craft titanic storms that could sink ships and turn back naval fleets, such things were beyond her, but those weren't where her expertise lay. "I wonder…could I perhaps poison you, mother? One day track you down in the deepest abyss of the seas and inflict upon you the same cold suffering that you did to me? Perhaps one day we'll find out…but that is the future. For now…I will focus on the present, one that belongs to me and me alone."

She could smell the saltwater of the sea from such a distance. Of course she could, though this world wasn't her own, she still possessed a bond to the ocean waters via her mother, a goddess who swam in the waters of the ancient world. She held some dominion over them, some but not much.

Such dominion would make for an interesting plaything as she and her Master enjoyed their stay in this Kurihara City.

"Which one should I get?"

Semiramis looked at the blond with a glare that was a mixture of annoyance and mild interest. She'd had to choose before, but such matters often were those of life and death. Even the most trivial of decisions, after all, once she became queen she held near-absolute power of her citizens. One word from her and it was off to the executioner's ledge…or one of her private chambers to serve as a guinea pig for her poisons. Having to choose between two colored surfboards that would more than likely never see usage after this little vacation was over? That was a new one.

Each board stood nearly a good two feet taller than Naruto, though Semiramis suspected that would change in the future once he hit his growth spurt. On his left lay a white board with slate gray designs while the other possessed a red with black-color scheme. The choice between the two was rather obvious.

To the side, Jiraiya chuckled as Semiramis took the white board from the young teen's grasp and put it back on the rack. Her coppery eyes looked over the blond before demanding for him to stand still. She quietly moved through the aisles, ignoring the flirty looks she received from those in the store include the ones working the registers. Even with her conservative outfit, her figure was still rather highlighted. Jiraiya couldn't deny that a part of him wondered what the Assassin would look like in a bathing suit as well. He wondered about it so much one could practically see the steam rolling out of his ears. Then suddenly, there was a loud growl as a second later his once goofy face unpleasantly screwed up in pain.

"Gargh!" It was hard to tell which hurt more, his stomach or his ass, perhaps both were equal in agony. He could count on his hand the number of times he'd felt this way, and they usually ended in only one way. Sweating heavily, his black eyes moved around the store frantically, finally finding what he now so desperately need. "Out of the way! Move it!" Screamed the Sannin, violently pushing people aside just as his student had done when they were on their way to cross the bridge into the city.

Observing it all was Naruto, who stood there with a puzzled expression on his face. When his Servant returned carrying a stack of items in hand, he immediately turned his gaze upon her.

"Worry not, he'll meet us back at the hotel. In the meantime, let's get going. We're supposed to be enjoying ourselves, so let's get to it. Starting with paying for all of this." As the boy looked back to see his teacher quickly entered the male restroom, Naruto failed to see a small but satisfied and triumphant smirk on her face. Semiramis then orderly examined the items once again to be sure they have all the products they need in their break; shirts, shorts, sandals, swim trunks, and the like, she'd taken a look at them all and grabbed a little bit of everything. Perhaps she'd gone a little overboard, but she figured this time things could be let slide. Besides, she had quite a bit of spending money this time around. "Naruto…I've thought about it a bit…and I suppose I can help you a little when it comes to surfing."

"Seriously?!" Immediately, she regretted her decision as Naruto was a hair's breadth away from dropping the surfboard and all the other items to hug her. Only her quick movements stopped him. Afterwards, she proceeded to drag him up to the register, completely ignoring the lingering gazes of those on all sides of them. Naruto remained blissfully unaware of their stares directed at her, but not the harsh glares directed his way. They were glares of jealousy.

Sadly, they would continue and likely grow once they made it to the beach. When that time came, Semiramis wondered how many would be able to work up the nerve to approach them. She was going to go out on a limb and say no more than four or five, especially if she made an effort to ward them off so they could have some privacy. For some reason, the thought of her and Naruto being by themselves on the beach made her heart race just a tad bit faster, faster than she would have liked.

It's not like his body's that impressive, he's still but a child. Rationalized the former queen upon their exiting of the store and on their way back to their hotel. Once again, she had to give credit to the Toad Sage. Whatever connections he had, they were good enough to get them hooked up in a nice penthouse suite that overlooked the beach to the north and to the west the surrounding forests and road. It was almost luxury and made Semiramis want to question exactly what kind of connections the white-haired Sannin possessed, but that could wait for later.

Besides, something told her that the Toad Sage wasn't going to moving about for some time.

Meanwhile...

It was painful, but he could get through it. He had to!

"Dammit all! I am the Toad Sage, and I won't be denied! I refuse to spend my entire vacation hold up here in this-ooooohhh!"

Right outside the bathroom stall, two men looked to one another, then back to the stall in question. Their noses wrinkled and their stomachs churned. A second later and they were rushing out the door. The rumbling noises continued all the way into the outside of the surf shop, causing several to look toward the back of the store in visible discomfort.

"Um, Boss?" said one store clerk to the head of operations.

"Someone…get the mop…and the plunger, something tells me this isn't going to be pretty." Groaned the blond with a shake of his head.

Of all the things you could be doing, this is what you choose to do? How utterly pathetic. Scoffed the orange-furred demon, only to quickly fill his dark prison and his host's mind with his demonic laughter. It echoed like a bell being rung, causing his host to snarl in annoyance. That was good, it was actually great. The more of a rise he could get out of the blond, the better.

"Geez, I'm trying to-ah! AHH!" His words were drowned out by the splashing of the water, and the fact that his lungs temporarily filled up with seawater. You stupid fox, this is your fault!

From what I heard, isn't surfing about being able to find your Zen or something? You know, kind of like fighting, which you admittedly still suck at it? Retorted the Nine-Tails with a deep snicker.

"Shut up!" Shouted the whisker-faced genin once his head broke the water's surface and he was given clean air to breathe. Quickly, he began to search the surrounding water. Within seconds he found it and was climbing back aboard, just as another wave came by. "I've got it this time, just watch!"

A snort came from the giant mammal within his gut. Silence was the response for the other end of the mental link. Naruto didn't mind that, sometimes silence from the First Poisoner was preferable to whatever biting and cynical words she could direct towards those she interacted with. Plus, Naruto could sense her emotions well enough to know when she was being hostile. Over by the shore, she watched him from her secured spot. There wasn't a soul in sight, which Naruto was somewhat grateful for. He wasn't expecting to master surfing in a single try, and his wipeouts would more than likely draw quite a bit of snickering from an audience.

Better it be out here where he could practice in solitude away from criticism than in the presence of his friends who'd no doubt poke and laugh at his pathetic attempts.

That was almost the case, he still had a giant, overgrown furball critic who'd follow him wherever he went. There was nothing he could do about that one.

The wave he was riding was steady, perhaps a bit too steady. And timely. Once Naruto got to his feet, the wave picked up, raising his higher and higher while pushing him forward. A laugh built up in his throat then exploded outward as he realized that he was without a doubt surfing, and not wiping out.

Yet.

Suddenly, the wave grew larger, larger than the jinchūriki had expected it to. A shriek rose in his mouth as he suddenly lost his balance and found himself flailing about atop his surfboard.

My, oh my, it seems water still isn't your strong suit. A shame considering your background.

Wha- Naturally, his mental question was cut off and wiped from his mind as Naruto felt his feet leave the board and the rest of his body touch the water. Actually, it was more like the water slammed into him. He was powerless before it, like a leaf being blown in the wind, or in this case, a fish helplessly caught in a rapid torrent. Normally, Naruto would have panicked, but some dormant combat instinct took hold of him, directing his body to move in ways he normally wouldn't have it moving. His Kitsune-ken were summoned and crossed together. In the blue water, they glowed bright orange like a bomb about to go off. Then they did go off.

Again, he tasted sweet oxygen, this time as the air rushed past him while he flew upwards. The water's surface grew distant until he realized that it was moving, shifting as if being directed by something. Or someone. He watched the seawater mold itself into a giant hand which promptly curled into a fist, that shot directly at him.

Naruto gnashed his teeth and swung both his weapons forward, the energized metal colliding with the watery construct resulting in an explosion of air and water that sent waves crashing about in all directions.

The water dissipated while Naruto found himself sailing backwards, his feet skidding across the sand. He came up in a combat position, his posture rigid and ready for action.

At least until he heard the clapping.

His face immediately dropped. "Semiramis, aren't we supposed to be, ya' know, on vacation?"

Proud laughter fell from the pink lips of the queenly Servant. She certainly looked the part, lying back on a gold-lined foldable chair with a drink in hand. An umbrella hung above her head keeping a majority of the sun's rays from pelting her pale and beautiful body. Gone was the dark clothing and high-heels she customarily wore; replacing them was a form-fitting black bikini with several gold locks and highlights. Her hair, which had remained tied up in a high ponytail when out in public, now stretched out behind her like the black curtain it was. Her sensual legs, devoid of any scars or blemishes like her upper body, lay crossed, her feet nonchalantly swinging back and forth. Semiramis raised the liquid-filled glass to her lips while giving the younger boy a seductive smile.

Or what would have been a seductive smile if Naruto had realized or cared how many men would have killed to be in his position.

"The point of a vacation is to enjoy oneself. Well, that is precisely what I am doing. I enjoy watching you exercise, and it's beneficial to you in the long run. Too much relaxation and you'll grow sluggish and then where would we be?" She was twisting the truth, yet another trait she'd picked up and feared Naruto would learn one thing. He was a jinchūriki thus he had a target on his head, a massive one. As the Toad Sage had informed her, that meant every second of the day she was going to have to be watching his back, especially at times such as this. That was one half of her reasoning, the other half was far more selfish - she simply enjoyed seeing her Master in action. Secretly, she'd come to find something charming about the way his face suddenly darkened when in the heat of battle. Such sudden fierceness from a normally gentle and kind person.

Seemingly accepting her reasoning, Naruto turned his gaze back to the water, his blue eyes searching for his surfboard. Upon spotting it, he quickly made his way towards it, wading into the water. He had every intention of getting back on it and trying his luck again.

"Naruto," Called the Assassin. Her voice caught his attention. Her voice, not her approaching body, her swaying hips, or her delicate breasts, but simply her voice. A voice that had decided lives, and he'd listened to it, identifying it as belonging to a friend. Semiramis crossed her arms, placing her hands on her elbows and looking away. "If you want…I might be able to help you with your surfing. As you just saw, I can manipulate water to a limited extent."

This time, he did hug her, and she didn't exactly fight him off. Again, hundreds, thousands of men would have killed to be in Naruto's position. Granted, as far as he was concerned, while he was hugging a beautiful woman, he was just hugging a friend.

Semiramis was actually thankful for that distinction to be made in his mind.

She stretched her hands out, sucking in a deep breath. Her fingers spread out like a spider uncurling their fingers, or maybe a dove preparing to take flight was a better comparison.

I am not you, nor do I ever desire to be you…but your blood flows through me. For that, I am grateful, and I shall use what power that blood grants me how I see fit. Helping this boy…it is my choice, and my own alone.

Another tide came, this one of medium size, comparable to one that Naruto had been suffering before. As he did before, he steadily rose, finding his balance as he rode out the wave. He was enjoying himself. Semiramis smiled as she quickly rose her left index and middle finger upward causing a pillar of water to shoot up, completely knocking the blond ninja off balance, but only temporarily. His instincts kicked in allowing him to regain control of himself and realign himself on his surfboard. Semiramis responded to this by raising the water, giving him a new wave to surf. His expression couldn't have been any happier at the act. Seeing the joyous expression on her Master's face roused something in Semiramis. She wanted to do more, so she did more.

What began as light indulgence had turned into something else. Semiramis' arms rose and fell like a conductor before her precious chorus. She played with the water, glee manifesting on her face as she moved her arms about, taking the white-crested waves with her. Every motion caused the localized sea to bend at her command, and with it, Naruto rose and fell, riding the watery waves with happiness shining on his face.

A thought wormed its way into her head. If I can do this with normal water…then perhaps…Her eyes traced Naruto, who was practically hopping between the water like a grasshopper more than a human being. Coppery yellow found azure blue. Naruto…you have to stop looking at me like that. I am a queen, but when I look at you, see you like that…you make me think that I'm something else, something…something…As much as she wanted to say lesser, she couldn't find it in herself to do that. Words had no more meaning, so she focused on actions.

Naruto must have felt it as his go-lucky expression quietly faded. A shadow blocked out the sun, causing him to look up. What he saw caused his jaw to drop.

"Semiramis! Really?! We're supposed to be relaxing! Not training!" Shouted the genin, watching the giant watery blob rise higher and higher. Blob was an apt description as the entity had no concrete shape or even visible features. It was merely a giant blue mass that quickly rose to tower over him.

For a response, the black-haired woman let out a haughty laugh. Her "creation" wasn't really anything to take pleasure in. Had she infused poison into the water, she might have had a better time in molding the water into something concrete. "Perhaps I find this relaxing, making your facial expressions of nothing but pure terror in which to revel in!" Shouted back the Assassin, thrusting all of her fingers out.

Suddenly, a single eye appeared in the center of the watery mass, a bulging violet-colored eye that locked in on Naruto. The young teen gave a startled cry of alarm as the mass began to descend upon him; it was more or less falling atop of him rather than lunging like a predator. Luckily, the terror was short-lived as Naruto regained a measure of composure; his Kitsune-ken were summoned and crossed in front of him.

SLISSSHHH!

A breath of exhilaration flew from the Assyrian woman's lips watching the massive orange-colored X blaze into existence, her water giant scattering away into droplets that dispersed back into the water…which her Master was descending towards. Her right hand moved out, palm facing up. Semiramis' brow knitted in concentration as she attempted to control the water. It bended to her command, becoming a swirling whirlpool directly below her Master.

Only at the last second did he notice it.

"Hey! Semiramis! Wait a second! Isn't this going a bit over-GAH!"

The sole jinchūriki of the Hidden Leaf Village vanished beneath the swirling blue waves. For the moment. In a single motion, Semiramis brought her fingers upward commanding the water to erupt as if it were a volcano.

"BOOOOAAARRDDHHHH!" Cried Naruto Uzumaki as he found himself soaring through the hot summer skies, his mind completely and utterly disoriented from the whirlwind, or whirlpool, of events. His arms flailed about in wild arcs as he found himself as helpless as a fish out of water. Again, it didn't last long.

A single twinkling of her fingers and one of her chains shot out from the sand and grabbed him by the ankle. Semiramis pulled back with her right index and middle fingers, and down came her Master, directly into a waiting pile of dove feathers that she conjured up at her side. Upon impact, they scattered to the wind and the sand.

"Gah…ah…ah…ahhhh…" Groaned the blond genin. It seemed it was going to be a while before he could refocus himself. That meant that Semiramis had a few minutes of peace to herself. Or so she thought.

To her credit, she maintained a look of professional stoicism as the Toad Sage approached them. Like his student, he too had changed out of his usual attire into a pair of swim trunks, his colored green with orange circles.

"Hey, don't let my presence stop ya', I just came by to drop a few things off and see how you were both doing." Stated the white-haired sage. Semiramis took a quick whiff of him, it seemed he'd showered, and showed good to get the stink off of him. Admirable, but the man's misfortunes were far from over. "When you said your mother was a mermaid goddess, I had a feeling you had some sort of water-based powers."

"I…really don't like using them that often, in fact, I rarely used them in life. You should know why." Stated the Assassin. "It's…peaceful here, I can understand why you chose to stop here."

"Yeah, it's…a place we can use to rest up, and even get a little practice in, as you seem to be doing." He didn't seem to question why and how they were the only ones on that part of the beach. Perhaps because he enjoyed the peace and quiet; it provided Semiramis the chance to glimpse the man who arguably was worthy of the respect that came with his title. "I've…got some things to take care of while on our first day." And like that, the glimpse vanished. "Feel like looking after the kid while I'm gone?"

"Don't I always?" She answered back, reaching out and stroking the boy's forehead. Semiramis couldn't deny that Naruto possessed a certain boyish charm about him whenever he was sleeping so peaceful like this. Sleeping, and not snoring like he usually did. "Just don't cause too much trouble, okay? I don't want to get into the habit of bailing you out."

"You're willing to do it for him." Shot back the human with a sly grin.

A dark aura suddenly encased Semiramis as she glared daggers at the Sannin. "Naruto is a special case."

"Oh, I'm sure he is."

She glared at him, and he smiled back. This was normally the part where she ordered an execution, and usually the execution took several long hours ending with the culprit an unrecognizable corpse. Such a fate was exactly what the pervert deserved. But Semiramis had something else in mind. She allowed the white-haired ninja to quite literally puffed out of the air, gone off to no doubt do his "research". Semiramis was fine with that, she had a little surprise of her own waiting in the wings for him. Above her head, one of her dove familiars flapped its wings and took off to her far right, where she knew the Toad Sage had gone off to. He'd be in for a nasty surprise.

In the meantime, she directed her golden eyes to Naruto, who continued to peacefully slumber away. Give or take perhaps ten minutes or so and he'd be awake again and no doubt ready for action. Semiramis could have been gone in that time, but she was going to stay.

Holding out her hands, she summoned the Kitsune-ken. They were in pristine shape in spite of the countless battles that Naruto had gone through using them. Battles that had ended with him coming out alive, which was her intention. "I suppose you deserve a reward, don't you, my dear little Master?"

A number of ancient Assyrian glyphs manifested across the sand from which rose a number of pots and metallic tools. Rising alongside them, hovering in the air were a number of colored liquids, some of whom seemed to cook the air with their mere presence. Semiramis could name each and every toxin as well as their effects and what happened when they were mixed together. Before her spread out on a metallic slab lay her creations, weapons crafted for the so-called Number One Hyperactive Knucklehead Ninja.

Nearly fifteen minutes later and she'd finished her task, having "upgraded" the Kitsune-ken into new and stronger forms that her Master would no doubt be able to make use of. Speaking of which, he was still sound asleep. Seeing his face sleeping peacefully, it warmed her heart for reasons she can't describe nor knowledge of. Then out of nowhere, her mind came up with an idea. A thoughtful, almost nervous look appeared on her face, deeply thinking as she biting her bottom lip. What came next was her expression relaxed and soften as she finally made a decision which she hadn't done since before her husband's death. Normally, this kind of decision was reserved for only to very few who she loved and cared for in her entire existence. Not even Ninus had the right to receive this act of affection from her despite their marriage; he never gained it to her relief. However, since her cherished ones were already gone, no one could claim it nor deserved it. But...

"…I…suppose there's no harm in it, you have earned it, after all." the Assyrian Servant whispered, dismissing her tools and moving towards the slumbering Jinchūriki before sitting up straight. Carefully picking it up and moving it without waking Naruto up, her delicate hands gently lowered till his head fell atop her lap, his soft coos were blissful music to Semiramis' pointed ears along with the soft ebb and flow of the waves.

It was tranquility, it was bliss.

Semiramis gently stroked his forehead, having near completely dried up from his earlier dip in the water. Looking out at the deep blue ocean with silted eyes glittering like gold, the Assassin pondered if she should join him for his next swim. There wouldn't be any harm in it, would there?

"It…has been a while since I took a dip in the water, or at least water that wasn't a spring or a bath." Muttered the slit-eyed woman while subconsciously caressing her Master's cheek. Her elf ears twitched as a sign of...serenity. "If you're with me…I'm sure it'll turn into something enjoyable." She finished with a soft smile that her blond Master couldn't see, but perhaps he could feel.

Right now, the Assassin was aware that what she was experiencing was a happy moment with Naruto, her Master. She didn't know why she was feeling happy about it, she didn't know why she should...but, she didn't care. However, she can and would cherish this moment. Dare she say, nothing can ruin it.

Quick like lightning, she received a message from one of her doves. Curious, she mentally dived in its mind till she had its shared vision. Whatever she saw made Semiramis' smile grow wider.

Ah, her moment got a lot better because of the scene she's witnessing through the eyes of her little dove.

On the first day of their vacation, it was a good day for the Wise Queen and the Knucklehead Ninja.

Somewhere else in Kurihara City, A few moments earlier...

Sometimes, life handed out things that were a tad bit too good to be true. Jiraiya had learned this lesson well, but the pain it had inflicted upon him had yet to stop him from living up the moment when he could. That's exactly what he was doing now.

Kurihara City was well-known for its beaches, and amongst those beaches there were some that particularly stood out. This was one of them - White Rock Cove. It stood quite a bit to the edge far south-side of the beach, bordering on the city's lower river which dipped into the sea. Either roaring loudly or a distant echo, the rush of the river could be heard, spilling into the deep blue ocean nonstop all year-round. It made for quite a sight, which brought in frequent tourists and beach-goers alike. Including women. Quite a number of women.

"Ahh…ah….oh yeah, that's right…hehehehe," Giggled the Sannin like a child in a kiddie shop. Of course, he was near perfectly camouflaged amidst the bushes and greenery. He was completely and utterly obscured from the view of the dozens of women who'd descended upon White Rock Cove for their own private evening. Some of them were shinobi based on the headbands and clothing that lay off to the side and atop beach towels. However, none of them were particularly good enough to detect him, a master ninja.

He'd decided to come at a good time as the women enjoying the water were all in their early to mid-twenties, all of their bodies admittedly at the peak of their development. Joyous voices called to each other as the water was splashed back and forth and bare feet tracked across the sand. Boobs bounced behind tight and loose colored fabric and asses and hips swayed as bodies moved to and from the water. Which dripped down the near-flawless bodies of the gorgeous women out enjoying the midday sun.

It was a paradise, a perfect, unfiltered paradise.

A grin on his face, the Toad Sage momentarily withdrew his gaze from his scope and began to furiously jot down his notebook what he was witnessing. Arguably the finest inspiration lay before him. With what he was seeing, without a doubt his next book would no doubt be a hit with his audiences.

Especially since he could finally go right on ahead with same-sex relationships, specifically between the two female leads in one of his many running projects. Two years of buildup and finally he'd give his fans what they'd been asking for.

And that was when life decided to balance things out. Jiraiya turned back to his spyglass, except looking through the leans, all he saw was darkness.

"Huh? What the-?" Flipping it around, he licked his finger and moved it over the glass to wipe away whatever obstruction it was that blackened his vision. A big mistake. "Ah!" Cried the sage as a black liquid suddenly burst from the glass hitting him right in the eyes. "W-W-What the hell?!" For a second, all of his senses went completely and utterly haywire, hearing became a cacophony of noises, smell become muddled, and of course, his sight was completely blackened. It all lasted for only an instant, or at least the loss of his sense of hearing and smell. Upon his eyes, the blackened mass began to harden forcing Jiraiya to tear at it with his eyes. "Stupid gunk! Come off already! I'm missing out on the action!"

He was on his feet and clawing away at the gel-like material. So caught up in the act he failed to notice the ruffling of the bushes around him.

"Finally! I…oh…shit…"

Immediately the Toad Sage wished the gel had remained over his eyes, it would have given him a half-plausible excuse to calm the myriad of scantily-clad women in front of him. All of whom looked quite angry.

One of them, a brunette with perfectly tanned skin picked up his spyglass and turned it around in her eyes. Her green eyes rose and glared daggers at the white-haired man as did her compatriots.

"H-Heh…u-u-u-u-um, h-h-h-h-hi, l-l-l-ladies." He nervously began. "W-W-W-W-W-Would y-y-y-you b-b-bel-believe me i-i-if I-I told you that I-I got lost?"

A tall and well-endowed blonde stepped forward, cracking her knuckles in a familiar manner. Earlier, she'd been making out in the water with a freckle-faced redhead who now stood at her side, looking equally pissed off as her girlfriend. "Lost, huh? Then please, allow us to set you on the right path, old man."

Jiraiya did the only thing he could do in a situation such as that - scream. A highpitch scream fitting for a little girl. Because of his screaming, he failed to notice that his notebook went flying when the scornful women lunged at him together, said notebook landed behind them. And because of his said screaming, he completely failed to notice the snow-white feathers falling to the sky curtsy of the dove who began to ascend upward. If birds could laugh, then that's exactly what the magically-borne familiar was doing.

And so too was its summoner.

As the beating began, to add insult to injury, from high in the sky the dove had bombed on the notebook's current page he had been working on before taking leave of the area.

Its dung had ruined the lead, potential writings on the paper and soaked some below it. His next Icha Icha novel have to be delayed.

On the first day of his supposed vacation, the Toad Sage knew pain. Great pain making for quite a horrible day. Like most days such as this, he'd brought it on himself.

Near the borders of Land of Earth, Evening...

"Well…this isn't exactly the reunion I pictured. Deidara, you've grown if only just a bit." Declared the armored ninja, steam exhuming from the ports on his crimson-red armor. "I take it you're here for me."

Deidara chuckled before giving what to be a mock bow before the older man. "Unfortunately so, Han-Senpai. I have indeed come to collect you for reasons…you're probably pretty aware of. Hm, you should have known that one day it was going to come to this."

Indeed, Han had known, he'd know since the day he first spoke to Kokuō and realized his existence was comparable to that of a shuriken or kunai. Or perhaps even a lump of gold. It was a dreadful fate, but one he'd steeled himself for.

As had his companions. "Well, well, well, who'd have thought you'd save us the trouble of hunting you down ourselves, you shitty little brat." Though he hid it, an angry knot formed on Deidara's head. It brought a smile to Ontake's face. "Tell me, are you still whoring yourself out to whoever is willing to pay a buck for that crapshoot that you call art, or have you moved on to more practical means?"

Han couldn't help but laugh as the formerly calm young rogue ninja's face exploded in a seething rage. He knew the expression well, he'd seen it quite a number of times on Deidara's face before; it hadn't lost its charm. Albeit, he did wish that the young artist wasn't sporting it along with a red and black cloak that made Han's blood run cold. And that the former fellow villager wasn't working alongside what appeared to him to be a hunchback with a mechanical tail.

From a single glance, he could tell that Deidara's partner was a ninja tool, a puppet. Just barely did he recognize the make and model of the puppet. Throwing a quick aside glance to Ontake, he saw that his handler was familiar with the puppet as well.

Silently, they both agreed that they were without a doubt in deep shit, and it was about to get deeper.

The several Anbu that had been tailing them readied themselves as they too knew they were about to get a helluva lore more than they bargained for. Not that that scared any of them. They were ninja, and this was their job.

A pleasant breeze blew across the wetlands, causing small-scale waves to form. Few clouds passed overhead, obscuring the sun from view allowing its warm rays to beat down upon the watery fields. In spite of that, the air was heavy with dread as every creature, big and small, predator and prey, felt the coming calamity and was quickly doing their best to make themselves scarce. In particularly, they wanted to get as far away as possible from the two cloaked men. The youngest of the pair burned with passionate anger that was near-visible to the human eye, the other maintained their cool disposition, keeping their gaze focused on Han all the while. From behind the hunchback, a segmented metal tail with a sharp end arose; its reflection on the water caught every move as its owner leered at Han.

"I hear that armor of yours is supposed to be pretty sturdy, perhaps I could make a puppet out of it once we're finished with you." Came the gravelly voice of the former Sand Village ninja. "Come quietly and this will be relatively painless."

"To hell with painless, hm!" Shouted Deidara, throwing his arms out to the side. There was a customary puff of smoke followed by the emergence of two giant bird-like masses of clay. "This bastard insulted my art, and that comes with consequences!"

"Uh-huh, hate to break it to you, ya' brat, but I've faced worse than those little clay dolls of yours." Shot back the Stone jonin with a look of disgust on his face. "Look at you, you once had some potential Deidara, but you chose to piss it all away…and now you're going to die here. At the very least, you'll get a decent burial once we drag your body back to the village." Ontake commented, causing the blonde's anger to further increase. Any more and it seemed the rogue ninja would go off just like his beloved creations.

The hat-wearing ninja chuckled watching the malevolent aura amass around his former comrade. It was clear that though he'd abandoned his homeland, Deidara had remained the same short-tempered person he always had been. It made for quite an amusement. In contrast, his apparent partner remained as cold and icy as a glacier, though he was no less deadly for it. Han had to admit, from where he stood, the dreaded puppeteer looked rather comfortable atop the bridge that suspended them all over the water. Hiding in the darkness with a stinger tail that could maim and kill at a moment's notice.

His gaze was caught by the former Sand ninja who directed his artificial appendage at him, directly at his stomach to be precise.

And so, it seems we'll be getting another workout. Noted the smooth voice of the five-tailed horse within him. In his inner world, a grassy plain the likes of which Kokuō once called home, steam erupted as he stomped his hooves down.

From his host, steam also erupted, quickly spreading across the water causing it to heat up to temperatures greater than the sun could produce. "Right, Ontake."

"I'll handle the brat." Responded the scar-faced jonin, taking a fighting stance toward the rogue ninja originating from their own village. "Once I'm finished, I'll swing back around and help you with the scorpion."

"Heh, by then, I may have already finished things up."

Han looked back at his handler, who returned his gaze with a smile. Steam exploded from the former's armor as he rushed forward to meet the metallic, poison-tipped tail. On the other end, rock formed into a pair of bladed gauntlets that rose in counter to the two approaching birds. In a single move, the constructs were cut apart, exploding into fiery clouds that sent superheated waves slamming across the water. Seconds later and countless objects flew up from the water, frogs and snakes made from clay. All dove in on the two men, men who'd been raised and forged within the walls of the Hidden Stone Village.

Seconds later and the once tranquil wetlands erupted into a red-hot warzone. By the time dusk fell, little would remain of the marsh…and the surrounding village.

On their journey returning to Han's homeland, it was going to be the worst day of the Steam Roller's life. Unfortunately for him, it wasn't going be the last.

A very belated summer chapter with some fluff, humor, and everyone being themselves. One thing you can probably take away from this chapter is Naruto's Kitsune-ken will be getting something of an upgrade that will be presented the next time he goes into battle…which will be against our favorite one-eyed scarecrow. Yep, next chapter will be the "homecoming" that sees our knucklehead return home with a new addition and everyone promptly wondering what in the hell did Naruto get himself into while he was out training.

Semiramis being able to manipulate water is something of a fanon idea of mine. Since her mother was a mermaid goddess and she can grow fish-like scales for defense it's a leap that I made that I hope nobody minds. After doing some research, it turns out ironically, Semiramis mother, Derketo is in fact a fertility goddess and fish were seen as sacred to her as they represented the life of the sea. Then again, Semiramis claims that eventually all women will arrive at the role of "life-giver" so perhaps it's a case of the apple not falling far from the tree in spite of her claims of animosity against her mother. As she said, normally, Semiramis has always stuck to her poison abilities, but being around Naruto is enough reason for her to start exploring what else she can do. Hope you all don't mind seeing some more of that.

Next chapter will be an official one and feature some first-meetings, first impressions, and Semiramis getting a look at where she'll be living for the foreseeable future!