Chapter 12

Paul was exhausted. He'd been running for over two days now, nonstop. He couldn't stop. He needed to stay on the move so he wouldn't feel the devastation. His wolf was riled up and confused; he didn't understand what had happened. He had recognized something in that bitch's eyes, but it wasn't the gravity-bullshit experience the others had felt. It was an imprint, all right, but it was different. He didn't feel the pull, thank God for small mercies, he still hated her guts, and he didn't want to be anywhere near her. He just couldn't ignore that she was something to his wolf. The wolf whined. Yeah, he didn't want that bitch either. Thank fuck they agreed.

When he couldn't run anymore, he decided to go home. He wasn't starving. He had eaten a deer last night, but he graved all things human, and the most he graved to touch Bella, kiss her, make love to her, but he was locked inside his beast. He tried to phase back a few times, but he could not calm down enough. It had been fucking scary experience not to be able to phase back. What if he couldn't get back to the human ever again.

He trotted behind his house and laid down on the ground inside the tree line. He laid his head between his paws and closed his eyes. He thought about Bella, which had always helped him before, but now his vision was interrupted by that bitch.

Fuck no! Leave me alone! He shouted inside his head.

Others had learned by now that they didn't interrupt his inner monolog. Sam had tried at first to calm him down so he could phase back, but it hadn't helped, nothing had, and Sam didn't even try to talk to him anymore. They all just let him be, which was exactly what he wanted.

He didn't know how long he had laid there behind his house, but he heard a car driving in front of the house. His ears perked up, and he lifted his head. It was Bella.

He waited for a while and then he saw her. His heart rate spiked, and he whined.

"Paul?!"

Bella walked towards him slowly.

Oh Bella, oh baby, come to me! Paul yearned. She didn't move fast enough.

He got up and waited for her to reach him. He needed to stay inside the tree line so the people running past his house wouldn't notice him. There was some sort of running spree in the Res or some shit like that, and there had been a steady stream of idiots dashing past. Thank fuck they stayed on the road.

"Oh, Paul! Are you okay? I've been so worried about you," Bella said, sobbing. She hugged his thick neck and buried her face into his fur, and in an instant, he was able to phase back.

He grabbed Bella into his arms and kissed her hungrily, sucking her face and pressing her between him and a tree. He lifted her and helped her to wrap her legs around his hips. Fuck he needed her. He needed to be in her, feel all of her. But first, he had to tell her what had happened.

"Bella, baby. Fuck, it has been a nightmare. Sorry I've been out for a few days. I couldn't phase back. I'm sorry, so sorry."

"It's alright, Paul. The most important thing is that you are okay. I've been losing my mind worrying over you. What happened?"

Paul dreaded this moment, but he had to tell her, "I imprinted."

"Yes, I guessed that, and I heard as much from Milly," Bella sobbed. "She told me that you were with Rachel Black."

"She did WHAT?"

Fuck he was going to murder that Milly-bitch.

"I tried to get hold of you, and no one answered my calls, so I went to Sam's. Only Emilly and Milly were there, and when Milly answered the door, she told me you were with Rachel."

He was so mad he started to shake.

"Shh. Paul baby," Bella said, kissing his face and skimming her hands over his biceps. "You are here now, and you are safe. I'm alright."

He calmed down and nuzzled her neck. Taking a few long breaths, he inhaled her scent.

"Oh, baby, I haven't been with her. I'm never going to be with her. It's you I want. It will ALWAYS be you," he said, kissing her face and neck. He cupped her face between his hands and looked deep into her eyes.

"It will always be YOU."

Tears were running down Bella's cheeks, and his vision was getting blurry too.

"Yes, I imprinted on her, but I had to get away as soon as it happened. I hopped into my truck, drove to the first dirt road leading to the forest, and left it there. It's still there. I've been running, unable to stop or phase back."

"Oh, Paul," Bella cried. "Why did she lie? It was so cruel of her?"

"She's mean bitch."

Then he kissed her. He couldn't wait any longer. He needed to claim her.

"I need you, baby. I need to be in you and feel all of you!" Paul said, kissing Bella's face, neck, and hair as he pulled clothes off her.

"Take what you need," Bella moaned when he grounded his erection against her.

She was soon naked, and he didn't waste time but thrust into her.

The connection was all he needed, all they needed. He was feeling whole again. He was back home.

And they fucked. It was a raw need and want, mixing with fear and anxiety.

It didn't take long for them both to fall over the edge. When Paul came inside her, he realized his wolf wasn't there. For the first time since the day Bella first saw his wolf, he wasn't there wanting to bite her. What the fuck did that mean?

They were breathing heavily, catching their breaths. It must be the fucking imprint; it had fucked up the wolf.

"Let's go in. We need to shower," Paul said and carried her quickly to his house. They took a quick shower and went to bed.

Paul pulled Bella tightly against his body; he needed to feel her skin against his. Bella sighed and kissed his jaw.

"So, how did it happen?" Bella asked.

Paul hated to remember that moment, but Bella needed to know.

"It was just after you left, and I was about to hop into my car and drive away when I heard someone talking behind me, and I turned. I recognized her right away, and when I looked at her eyes, it happened. But it wasn't anything like what I've seen and heard from the others. Yes, some kind of connection formed, but it didn't make me want her. I don't feel any pull; there isn't any compulsion to be whatever she wants me to be. She means absolutely nothing to me."

Bella nodded her head against his chest.

"You remember that I've fucked her once," Paul said, ashamed.

"Yes, baby, I remember," Bella said, kissing his cheek. "You don't need to feel embarrassed. You fucked quite many women back then. Maybe it's a good thing you did; you know already that you don't like her."

Paul groaned. It was the time of his life that he hoped to forget.

"So, you do also remember that she didn't take it well when I didn't want to have anything more to do with her. It was just that one mindless fuck."

"Yes, I remember something," she answered, waiting for him to continue.

"So, after trying to get into my pants many nights in Frankie's place, she started to show up at my place dressed like a whore trying to seduce me. I laughed at her face, and eventually, she did get the message and stopped coming. But Jesus, that, I hate that bitch, and now some fucking old spirit thinks that she is my soulmate. How fucked up is that."

"Well, if the reason for imprinting is to reproduce, she is most likely a better catch than I am," Bella said.

"Baby, please, don't say that," Paul said, tightening his arms around her.

"But what you are saying means that our only hope to break the imprint is gone since Rachel won't ever refuse you, and she won't settle for being a friend."

Paul nodded in agreement. He inhaled Bella's scent and tried to stay calm.

Bella brushed her fingers over his cheek and eyebrows and kissed the tip of his nose. "We'll find some other way. And maybe we can make her see sense. Surely, she doesn't want to be bound to a man who doesn't want her, love her."

"Please, Bella, don't go anywhere near her. I'm planning not to tell her. I don't know how long that gives us, but it is one of the rules that go with imprinting that only the wolf can talk about the imprinting to the imprint, and no one can interfere. It hopefully gives us time to find another way to break it."

Paul knew for sure that the bitch would not let him go. She was the most selfish, self-centered bitch he'd ever met.

"Paul, you know that I have to leave for Seattle tomorrow afternoon. The practice starts on Monday morning. And I will be away for two weeks."

"Yeah. I must say that I wish that you didn't have to go, but of course, you go. I'll manage, we'll manage. The good thing is that I have more time to read the archives. Harry has tried to track the missing one, but so far, no luck."

"Hey, what was that meeting with the dude from New York?" Paul just remembered that she had had the meeting.

Bella shifted a bit. She glanced at him under her long lashes and looked a bit nervous.

"Um... He wanted me to come to play with them after the year with Seattle is over."

Paul's heart started to beat faster. He knew it; she would leave him and move away.

"What did you answer?"

"I said that I think about it. I don't know what to do. I mean, it is an opportunity of a lifetime to be asked to be a soloist for that orchestra, many big names have done that, but I just don't know. I don't want to leave you. I really don't. But then I think that it would be only for a year, we would survive. But now we don't know how this imprint will affect us."

Paul sighed. "You need to do what is best for you," he said.

"I don't know, Paul. But I don't have to decide anything now. They gave me till the end of April. It is over a month from now."

"They really want you, don't they?"

"I guess. I wish we could both go. There would be so many opportunities for you too."

There was nothing he could say to that.

"In a way, I'm happy that it happened. That you imprinted," Bella said, drawing circles onto his chest. "It was terrible to live in fear of not knowing when and who. Now at least we know, and now that we know that it is Rachel, we know that it would have happened sooner or later anyway. What do you feel?" Bella asked.

"Mixed feelings. I mean, it is just as you said, no more waiting for it to happen. It also makes it easier I hate her guts. But I hate this feeling of helplessness, not knowing what I can do to break it. You know the wolf didn't want to bite you anymore."

"Oh, what do you think it means?"

"I think he was trying to tell me something before, but I didn't listen. I guess that biting you would have been some kind of marking, a wolf marking its mate. Maybe if I had bitten you, I would not have imprinted. I don't know. It makes me mad as fuck. All this might have been prevented early on. But I was too scared of hurting you, not knowing what it meant."

"Hey, baby, we don't know that for sure. It is bizarre that no one knows what it was all about, or the elders refused to talk about it. Please don't blame yourself. Let's forget the what-ifs and concentrate on the present."

"I love you so damn much, baby. Don't ever forget that."

"Um, Paul, there is something I have to tell you about," Bella said with some uneasiness in her voice.

"What? You're scaring me," Paul's heart started to beat faster.

"The night we were supposed to see the movie, Edward saw me in front of the theater when I was waiting for you, and he came to talk to me. Four men tried to get me to go with them, and Edward drove them away, and then he asked if he could come to see the movie, and we went. But I regretted it even at the movies. He started to give me chills, and I realized I was afraid of him."

What the fuck? Paul got up to sit and pulled Bella to sit on his lap. "Whoa, whoa, slow down, baby. What men? What did that fucker do?"

Bella told him about how four men had harassed her and how Edward had shown up. That was no fucking way a coincidence that he was there. The fucker must have known that he wouldn't be able to show up, but how had he known that? Was he stalking them?

"It's alright; I'm not mad at you. He used to be your friend, and you got scared by those other fuckers. But promise me, baby, please promise me not to have any contact with him anymore, okay."

"I promise. I haven't replied to any of his messages."

"Let's send one together where you tell him that you don't want to have anything to do with him anymore. He should understand where you are coming from. It's not right that fucking vampires hang around humans, especially with the one that is mated to their mortal enemy."

They made love through the night. He was exhausted, but he couldn't sleep. They needed to connect and reconnect and show one another that nothing had changed. And between the two of them, it hadn't; they were as good as ever, but it bothered Paul that his wolf wasn't there anymore. What the fuck did that mean?

After seeing Bella drive off to Seattle the next afternoon, he hopped to his truck and drove back to La Push. He needed to make sure that Sam understood where he stood in this imprinting shit and that no one tried to interfere. He didn't know how long he could keep the secret from the elders and the bitch, but he would damn well try.

He also would let that Milly-bitch know that he would rip her tongue off if she ever talked to Bella again.

Sam was digging in their garden when he arrived. That dude was always digging holes into the ground.

"Oh, look who's gotten out of a funk," Sam hollered.

"Yeah, Bella came to see me, and I was able to phase back," Paul told him.

"She did?"

"Why the fuck any of you dickheads didn't answer her calls? She was worried sick," Paul asked.

"We didn't know what to tell her. Honestly, Paul," Sam said and walked towards him. He took a beer from the cooler and offered it to Paul, but he declined. He hadn't come here for a friendly chat over a beer. This would most likely end up in a big argument.

"You think it was better coming from that Jacob's bitch than from you, huh? I swear, Sam, if she as much as looks at Bella, I'll lose my shit, and she'll pay what she's done to Bella."

"Stop it, Paul! You cannot talk like that about the imprint. She's done shit to Bella if you think about it. She says out loud things that we all think about. We all worry about you two getting hurt when you imprint and try to keep things up with Bella. We don't want anything bad to happen to Bella either, but you two aren't meant to be. We all know that you cannot deny the imprint, and the pull will make you see that sooner or later. It wasn't far-fetched for Milly to think you would be with Rachel. You imprinted on her, for fuck's sake!" Sam was getting pissed too.

Paul couldn't believe his ears. He stared at his friend with loathing.

"Are you serious, Sam? You know what that bitch is like. She wants to humiliate and hurt Bella. Fuck Sam, you saw how she was like last time. You ALL knew that I wasn't anywhere near Rachel. Milly knew, but still, she made Bella believe that I was being dishonest and even cheating on her. Milly made her think that I wouldn't keep my promise to her. I PROMISED that I would tell her first thing if I imprinted. I PROMISED SAM, and I kept my promise, but it took a little longer before I could do it. Milly hurt Bella on purpose, Sam. Is that the right way to behave hmm? You precious imprints are free to shit other's people's lives, hmm?!"

He was really starting to lose his shit.

"Calm down, Paul. I get that you are upset. But don't put that on Milly. She is young and is little rough on the edges sometimes. But we all are worried about you."

"Okay, I let it slide this time, but no more. Make sure that she won't ever talk to Bella again. And I can't, and I don't want to be around her anymore."

"Paul, be reasonable. The pack is like family; we spent time together..."

"Family don't treat others like Milly does. Bella is MY family. She is the most important thing in my life. Any of you don't respect that. I'll come to the official pack meetings, but I won't spend any more time with the pack than is necessary. I've had it; I don't give a fuck what any of you think about Bella and me."

Sam sighed and took a long swig from his beer.

"Paul. You have to tell Rachel."

"The fuck I have. I won't tell her shit and as you know the rules, either do you or anyone else. It's strictly between me and that bitch, and you WON'T interfere. Understood?! She won't ever hear it from me. I'll find the way to break it first."

"You're not going to tell her you imprinted on her?! What the fuck Paul?!" Sam shouted.

"No, and there is nothing you can do about it."

"Don't you feel the pull? She will feel the pull and will be confused about what is going on."

"I don't care about what she might or might not feel. I feel something, but it's nothing painful, just awareness that something has happened, but I don't feel anything towards her, no pull, nothing."

"It will get stronger. The longer you deny the imprint, the harder it gets." Sam was scratching his head. "I have to tell elders about this."

"Fuck NO. Why the fuck do they need to know? This has abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do with any of them."

"But you are wrong. Imprinting is important to the shapeshifters, and the elders have kept records about it for centuries. You are no different than the rest of us, Paul. And Rachel is Billy's daughter. He is entitled to know. It affects her."

Paul was fucking frustrated. They weren't any closer to finding anything from the archives, no matter how much they've read. They could not be sure if the missing documents had anything that could help him, but it seemed that there was anything in the ones that were still in the archives.

"Damn it, Sam. Give me some time before telling the elders. And it would be better for that bitch if she didn't know because I won't ever accept her. There is no need for her to get any ideas. I won't spare my sentiments if I have to tell her how I feel about her."

"This really is so fucked up, Paul. Imprinting is supposed to be a happy thing, making you stronger, happier, and the whole pack."

"Cut it right there, Sam. You are not going to guilt-trip me to accept Rachel. That won't work. Listen to this: I rather die than lose Bella," Paul said and moved to leave.

"Be careful what you hope for, Paul."

AN:

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