Drabble 86: Push and Pull
It was always the same pattern.
One of them took charge, and admitted something to the other, and then the other one followed their lead. It had happened over and over, this push and pull.
It had been Fitz who sealed their friendship in the Academy, ending their rivalry by talking to Jemma and telling her he wanted a friend.
It had been Jemma who pressured him to leave their safe, indoor non-mobile lab to join Coulson's team, convincing him to come along for the ride.
And in their adventures on Coulson's team, they had gone back and forth even more. At the bottom of the ocean, Fitz had broken the unspoken barrier between them, telling her he was in love with her. He had sacrificed himself to save her, giving her the oxygen.
Before the end of the war with the Inhumans, Jemma had told Fitz to be careful on the mission, and that she wanted to talk about what he had said at the bottom of the ocean. She had mended the bond that had been fraying between them, saying maybe there was something to talk about.
Shortly after that, it had been Fitz who asked her to go to dinner with him. Fitz, who kept the reservation for six months while she was on the alien planet, and finally took her when he got her back. After he dove through a hole in the universe.
She had kissed him in the lab, and then he had said they were cursed.
They had held hands in what looked like snow, and after she had told him they had waited long enough, and couldn't waste any more time not being together, while he looked at a precious picture of space on the wall and declared it his prized possession. She had silenced him with a kiss.
After encountering Hive and Daisy, they had both taken charge, deciding to not talk and simply act as they fell back on the bed and crossed yet another barrier that had lain between them, this one completely physical. It was one of the few times in the cycle where it was truly unclear who pushed for it, or even if they were just in complete synchronicity.
He had started spending the nights with her, when they officially started a relationship. He had asked her to live with him, and she had started a mad hunt for an appropriate living arrangement.
She had hacked into the Framework and brought him back, and held him while he cried. She had helped him heal, and start healing their relationship.
If she thought about this enough, she realized that he was next in the pattern. But she didn't want to continue following the pattern. Thinking about all of this, she realized that, as far as declarations were concerned, and grand gestures of romance, Fitz had done almost all of it. It didn't matter to her, as long as they were together, but she wanted to show Fitz that she was completely and unbelievably in love with him, and to do that, she wanted to break the cycle.
The push and pull that had defined their relationship since the beginning; it was funny to think about that way. It wouldn't end, but she intended to disrupt it by being the one to speak first, and having Fitz follow. It was a big step, but she wanted it more than anything. She felt ready.
And she knew that it was already on Fitz's mind, because of the conversation with his LMD.
She just had to find a good way to do it.
Jemma heard the door open and gave a final look around, making sure everything was set.
"Jemma?" Fitz called.
"I'm here." She called back. She watched him enter the room, holding back her excitement with difficulty.
He looked around, confused, and his gaze finally rested on her, standing in the middle of the room. "What's going on?" he asked.
She smiled, her hands clasped in front of her in nervousness. "I wanted to surprise you."
She saw his eyes move across the room, to the pictures of them she had put up on the walls, over to the record player set up in the corner. He moved closer to the walls, to inspect the pictures, and Jemma went to start the record player.
She looked at him with a small smile, and when he recognized the song her smile grew. It was the song that had been playing when they met, on their first day at the Academy.
She watched him look through the photos she had arranged on the walls, photographs of their days at the Academy and Sci-Ops, and goofy moments on Coulson's team, captured by Skye when they weren't paying attention. She'd put some experimental designs on the walls as well, projects they had designed together throughout their relationship. The ICER was there, with other favorites. She put up the pictures of him that had been on her phone, the only things that had made her smile on Maveth before she had met Will. She's also put up some pictures of monkeys, to make him smile.
She walked over to the coffee table, and after a minute or two he followed her, looking at what she had put on it. There were ticket stubs from the first movie they had seen as a couple, a copy of the documents they had signed to buy this apartment, a DVD of Doctor Who, a piece of the portal to Maveth, the brochure for the S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy they had gotten in the mail as teenagers (it was quite thick for a brochure). A bottle of wine was on the table, with two empty glasses next to it, and on a plate was a sandwich, cut in half: a prosciutto, buffalo, and mozzarella sandwich, with a hint of pesto aioli. A D.W.A.R.F. drone, the first of the seven they had built, was also on the table.
She hadn't had much to work with, but she put out everything she could think of. And find.
"Jemma." Fitz said softly.
"It's our story, Fitz." She said, in just as soft a voice. She had watched his reaction as he'd looked at everything, and she was honestly a bit emotional now. He'd just seemed so shocked, but pleased, a faint smile on his lips. Now he looked at her, his blue eyes wide. "We've been through so much together."
He nodded.
She stepped closer to him, taking his hands. She smiled at how his expression changed, knowing he was realizing what was about to happen. She spoke before he could. "We've been ripped apart and put back together so many times, and through all of it you've been by my side." She smiled, remembering when he said this to her, and felt her eyes start to sting with tears. "You've been beside me the whole damn time. And I plan on keeping it that way." She swallowed and looked into his eyes, knowing it was time. "Leopold James Fitz, will you marry me?"
His gaze was locked with hers, and she saw the emotion clear in his expression; the shock evident in the tenseness of his jaw, the joy in the crinkle of his eyebrows; the devotion in his eyes. "Jemma." He said, his voice thick. "Are you sure?"
She loosened her grip on his hand. "Are you not?"
He stopped her from taking her hand away. "Of course I am. Jem, I've dreamed of this for years."
Relief bubbled up inside her. "So that's a yes, then?"
He smiled at her. "Absolutely."
She grinned, though at the same time she tried to scowl at him. "Why would you ask if I'm sure before saying yes? That was torture!"
"I know we haven't really gotten back to where we were before the Framework, that's all." He said. "I wanted to make sure you're doing it because you want to, and not just because you think it will fix things."
"I'm doing this for me." She promised him, making her voice steady. "For us, because I think it's time."
He brought his hand to her cheek, caressing it, and with his other hand reached to the back of her neck, pulling her closer. She leaned in happily to kiss him, one hand on his shoulder, but it was a very quick kiss. She couldn't contain her laugh of joy as she realized he had said yes, and wrapped her arms around him, too excited to even kiss him. "Fitz, we're going to be married!" she cried against him.
He held her against him, and she felt his chuckle through her body. "This is the most wonderful thing anyone's done for me." He said.
She looked up at him, feeling as if she were vibrating with energy. "I love you."
"I love you too."
He went to kiss her again, and this time, Jemma wasn't too excited for it. She leaned into it, her restless energy calming as it found something to focus on: Fitz. She pressed her lips to his, slowly and with heat, getting lost in him. He drew her to the sofa and pulled her down with him, kissing her all the while. Jemma started undoing his buttons, and he was more than happy to help. She had his shirt about halfway unbuttoned when he paused.
"What?" she asked, kissing his neck.
He looked at the table. "Sleepy is here. The D.W.A.R.F. can't see this."
She stopped, with difficulty, and then sighed, her lips ticking up in the trace of a smile. "This is definitely over G-rated."
He started to stand, but Jemma beat him to it. "Don't move." She told him. She wanted to pick things up after. She picked up the drone and brought him to the kitchen, safely out of sight of them. When she came back Fitz grabbed her, physically pulling her beside him. She landed back on the couch and was immediately caught up by him, and she smiled against his cheek. "It's good to know you're so thoughtful." She joked.
"Just don't let any of the others know, or I'll never hear the end of it." He said between kisses.
"There's a lot we won't be telling them." She said suggestively.
He sighed heavily, and paused just long enough to meet her eyes. "I really do love you." he said, breathing heavy.
She cupped her hand on the back of his neck, her own breath a bit short. "I love you too. I've got everything I need right here."
He looked over her shoulder. "Is my space poster here?"
She silenced him with a kiss, pressing him against the couch. He didn't complain.