A/N: Alright. Before I get to updating the next chapter of ZO, I have both some good news and some bad. The good news is that I made it to DoomCON all in one piece. The bad news is that I only get free internet if down in the lobby. Sucks because I really wanted to do some updating while in the room at night. But whatever. I'll move my lazy ass down to the lobby just for you guys. Also hanging out with two of my friends, metros2soul and Digital Revolution, while here. So that's been pretty fun, even if we were tired from our travels. But whatever. ON TO THE UPDATAGE! And, of course, as I've said before, if any of you happen to be at DoomCON this weekend, do please feel free to come and find us while there. =3 I'll be wearing a black cat hat with a skull on it so it shouldn't be too hard for anybody to find me. And if you're not going to DoomCON...eh...well...I guess I'll just say please enjoy the updatage. XD If any of you would be interested in keeping up with my DoomCON updates though, you can do so at my deviantart account: Pat-The-Kitsune. Well, hope you all enjoy the next few chapters. =3
ZADR Orange Chapter 76
Warnings: Extreme OOCness
Rating: M for later chapters
Disclaimer: We do not own Invader Zim, nor any of the characters from it. We do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Zim: Notgonnadie
Dib: Me
Enjoy. =3
Turning off the video, Zim shook his head. "I'm sorry..." he apologized.
Hearing Zim behind him, Dib jumped and turned on his knees to stare up at Zim with wide eyes. "Wh-What the hell was that, Zim?" he pointed at the screen. "Tell me what's going on!" he demanded, tears streaming down his cheeks now. Having to relive that moment in time, even if not remembering it the first time, was just as painful as when it first happened.
Slumping to the floor, Zim carefully wrapped his arms around Dib. "I-I didn't want you to hurt...I'm sorry..." he apologized again.
Bringing his hands up to wipe at his eyes, Dib could only break down even more. "Then why have you been lying to me this entire time?" he curled in on himself more, burying his face in the Irken's uniform top. "It hurts when you lie to me!" he cried, so horribly confused now as his memory was only partially there now, the rest of it still waiting to be jogged and a good portion of it completely missing for the time being.
"I-I wanted you to be happy...I thought if you didn't remember anything, you could be...I wiped your father's memory s-so you could go home..."
Lifting his head from his hands, Dib looked up at Zim. "What...? Y-You wiped my memory? Don't you think I might have been happy before you did that? A-And I don't even know whether I want to know why you had to wipe my dad's memory for me to be happy!" his voice began to shake. "N-Not remembering anything at all is worse than remembering if there's nothing good to remember..." he said, his voice slightly strained.
"I-I wanted you to be happy..." Zim repeated helplessly. "You never wanted to see me again... I didn't mean anything to you anymore. But please... I-I hadn't finished talking..." he said, desperately searching for the right words to say.
"Finished talking about what? Because if you really loved me as much as you said you did in those videos, you wouldn't have wanted me to forget that!"
"Unless it hurt you..." Zim whined, taking hold of his antennas again and yanking hard on them, wincing each time.
"So you thought it would hurt me less if I thought you hated me? When you're the only one who knows I'm not insane...? And the one thing that is still keeping me going...? And the closest thing to a friend I ever had...? You thought that leaving me all alone on Earth with absolutely no explanation would hurt me less than at least knowing somebody in my life actually cared for me? Even if only at one time?"
"I-I thought you... You always acted like you wanted me gone...before, that is... Th-Then I did this to you... I'm only here because you can't do it alone."
"But I never wanted you to leave Earth! You've been my life for the past 5 years, Zim, and nothing can change that! If you left, my life would be over, and I don't know what I would do with myself!"
"I-I thought...I didn't know you had felt like that...the whole time?" Zim asked, wrapping his arms tighter around Dib and nuzzling into his back. "I-I'm sorry...I thought you wanted me gone..." he said in a low whisper.
"Yes, the whole time! Why else do you think I let you get away so many times? I could have captured you several times throughout the years if I had wanted to! But I didn't! I didn't!... B-Because then everything would have ended if I had... A-And I never would have gotten the chance to ever see you again..."
Nuzzling into Dib more, Zim held him tighter, his antennae drooping low. "Why didn't you say something?" he asked.
"Because I thought you were homesick!" Dib exclaimed, his own antennae drooping. "I thought you hated this planet and showed no interest in staying around. I didn't want to keep you here forever if you ever chose to go home because I didn't want you to hate me any more than you already did..." he said in a broken voice.
"I DIDN'T hate you... I don't hate you... I-I just didn't want to get dissected..."
Dib could only flinch back at the other's words a bit. He had threatened to dissect the Irken so many times in the past; he had assumed the other must have hated him. "...I'm sorry... I-I thought you had hated me from the start... A-And even though I didn't want you to leave, I-I didn't want my planet being taken over either... So I threatened you, hoping you would take out most of your anger on me and not the planet..." he said, bowing his head, his antennae shuddering.
"...But... Oh, Dib..." Zim hugged him tightly. "I-I don't have a mission... I couldn't have taken over this planet even if I had wanted to... I was banished to Earth... My leaders thought I didn't know, but I did... I just pretended to have a mission to make myself feel like I had a purpose in life..." he said, not having admitted that to anyone else before.
"Why couldn't you have just told me then? Maybe things wouldn't have been so hard on us if I had known from the start...and we could have gone through all of this without all the hurt involved..."
Zim sighed. "You would have thought I was lying..." he said, looking away.
"And you would have thought I was lying if I had told you how I really felt this entire time!" Dib looked up, narrowing his eyes on the other a bit.
Zim looked away from him again. "Looks like we're both too stubborn..." he said, a small smile playing along his lips.
"I just don't want to lose you... I know that's selfish, but I don't want you to leave... I want you to be in my life every day for the rest of my life!"
Zim smiled down at him. "It's not selfish... so long as I can have you too..." he pulled Dib more into his lap.
"Well, I'm not the one trying to leave you..." Dib said, his antennae drooping as he slumped down a bit, a small shudder running through his body.
Zim ran a hand gently through Dib's hair. "I'll stay as long as you want me... I love you..." he pulled Dib's head back and kissed him gently.
A light pink blush taking over his face as he blinked the last of his tears out of his eyes, Dib's antennae perked before falling back at the kiss. "I-Is that a promise...?" he asked in a low voice.
Zim sighed. "I'm not sure if you will believe me... but I promise..." he kissed Dib once again, nuzzling him. "I want to be with you..." he said, rubbing Dib's cheeks with his fingers. "I-I'll give you your memory back... J-Just... Please don't hate me..." he said, afraid of how Dib might react once he remembered everything that had happened.
"Why would I hate you? I don't think anything you could ever do or say to me would make me hate you..." Dib said, his voice coming out in a quiet whisper now. "I love you too much..." he nuzzled Zim back.
Zim smiled. "I hope you still do when you remember..." he sighed and stood up, helping Dib up as well. "Come on... We'll go restore your memories..." he said, taking Dib by the hand to lead him towards another room.
Allowing Zim to help him up, Dib reached up to take Zim's hand. "Wh-What if I promise you I will? W-Will you believe me then?" he asked, not wanting Zim to think that way of him.
Zim pulled Dib close. "Yeah... I'll believe you..." he nodded.
"Then no more doubting me, okay?" Dib said, letting his eyes slip closed as he pressed himself against Zim tiredly.
Zim smiled. "If you want... we can do it in the morning... It is pretty late... You look tired." he said, not wanting to push Dib into doing it right away.
Dib could only yawn in response to that. "Would that be okay? Is there anything important I need to know from my memory?" he asked, already nodding off on Zim.
"I don't think you're missing anything that can't wait till tomorrow..." Zim kissed him again.
Nuzzling himself against Zim as though encouraging the other to carry him the rest of the way, Dib's antennae fell back to rest comfortably against his head. "Mmm... Okay..." he said, already for the most part asleep.
Hefting Dib up into his arms, Zim carried him to his bedroom, laying him down in the bed gently. "I really need to install a window down here..." he laughed a little before crawling into bed next to Dib and pulling the covers up over the two of them.
A/N: And there you have it for Chapter 76. =3 I'll get on with the reviews now despite how tired I am at the moment. Please excuse any less than coherent responses you may get back from me. My brain is pretty dead at the moment.
To Klara2012zimdib: Lol. XD No worries. They'll be back together soon enough. And I'm glad to hear you're still enjoying the story so much. Even if it did make you cry. Honestly enough, I like to try and pull at people's emotions as much as physically possible when writing. So it's nice to hear when I'm able to do that. XD Anyways, thanks again~ And here's your requested update. =3
To Kuro: Lol. XD Oh yes indeed. Glad to hear you enjoyed the massive updatage. I wanted to get as much in before DoomCON as possible. But as for when we'll get to the chapters that go past zogoodfics, I must admit, I have no idea how long it will take to get to those. I wanted to catch up by the time DoomCON came around, but unfortunately, I had a hard time getting myself to work more on this story. I appreciate the kind words all the same though. And I'm glad you're enjoying the fluff in this story. =3 Well, until next time.
To lillybean queen of the i ocean: Oh yes. D8 Poor Zim and Dib are put through quite a lot in this story. But, of course, they'll come out on top eventually. =3 Anyways, thanks for continuing to read. I really appreciate the continued devotion to this story. ^^
To blood emocat (Kayla): Lol. XD If you want me to call you Kayla, then I'll continue to call you Kayla...or blood emocat...or whatever you feel like being called. Either way, I'm certain it will be obvious enough to you that I'm addressing you and your future comments. Glad to hear you're still enjoying the story so much. =3 And of course it's suspenseful. XD Wouldn't be as good of a story if it didn't have at least some suspense in it. And I like leaving you guys will a certain sense of uncertainty when reading this. Tis fun for me to see your guys' reactions. =3 Anyways, thanks once again for reading. And, as always, I'll look forward to hearing back from you more in the future. =3
To Invader Madd: Haha. XD Glad to hear you're enjoying the story so far. =3 Trust me, there are plenty more plot twists to come in this story. =3 Hopefully they'll all be plot twists you enjoy to some extent. =3 But until then, I do hope you continue to enjoy the read. ^^ Until next time~