CHAPTER 42-TRUTH BE TOLD?
"For the life of me I cannot figure out why you're giving some of the money out" Jessica spoke to Baz while sitting at the dining table at the Cody home.
Baz had told her about the incident with Craig and Deran as a precaution if they said anything. He saw Pope faintly and slipped him some money, the last one who didn't receive it was J. That was why the couple was at the house, well that was part one of the reason.
"If I didn't, the two of them would have hounded me for it and it would have made things ten times worse"
Jessica picked at the skin on the apple she was eating before taking a bite. She chewed for a while then brought up her next question, "Okay, can I ask why you think it's a good idea to have Nicky on her side?
Taking a seat next to her Baz leaned back and looked at her. "Because if she trusts us enough, she's going to try to convince J and I really need those papers back in my name. I think he's fully aware of what I'm trying to do"
There was no doubt that J figured out what was going on. They knew he was talking to Smurf so she was still filling his head with whatever she wanted. Baz thought it would be best to try and work from the outside in, starting with Nicky.
As Jessica popped her mouth open to talk, she heard the front door open and she doubted it was any of her brothers. She took another bite of her apple as the two teenagers had walked into the kitchen. They all stared at each other for a moment and Jessica spoke after flickering her eyes between them.
"Hey, how did that science test go?" Jessica was asking Nicky as they talked the other day about her schoolwork.
"Mrs. Baulm hadn't graded anything yet but I think I passed. I use that thing you told me to do, and I completely understood it this time around. You should have totally been a teacher"
Jessica smiled faintly while chewing the rest her fruit. "Well, what can I say, I'm the only one in this family that graduated high school" She had excluded J as she was only talking about her brothers.
Baz looked back at Jessica once more. "You got your GED, technically you didn't actually graduate because you dropped out like the rest of us
"Shut up Baz, I don't see you with a college degree either and it's too early for me to fight with you" She reminded him as she liked to rub it in everyone's face. "I got to go to the store soon, pick up some groceries for the house, do you need a ride to school?"
Since J had already at the chance to graduate early, he had been taking Nicky every day. She was close to being done as well as she only had a couple days left. It was Jessica's plan to split them up while Baz had taken J to the lawyer. He had given her a quick side eye knowing what she was thinking but didn't want J to see it.
"No, I'm going to take her" The boy jumped in rather quickly, feeling suspicious about the situation.
"I don't think you're going to have time; we have that meeting with Morgan soon"
"It only takes me like twenty minutes to get to the school and back here. It's not going to interfere with that"
The dining room had gotten quiet again and the only noise that happened was when Jessica took another bite of her apple. It was clear that there was tension and whether Nicky was oblivious to it, the other three were not.
"Jessica is willing to take me if you have something to do..." Nicky told him while shifting the backpack on her other shoulder.
J looked over at his on-off girlfriend, knowing she was going to fall for their trap. He didn't want to make it obvious that he had a problem because he was still trying to play the situation smart. J didn't think that Nicky would say anything because he had also been careful not to tell her too much.
"It's really no big deal, but if you don't want me to that's cool. It's just on my way so I thought if you didn't want to go..." Jessica trailed off waiting to see what J's response was.
He didn't have a chance to answer as Baz began talking to him again. "You're good with going to see her, right? I already called so she knows we're coming anyway"
Baz and Jessica were willing to back the young couple into a corner. The problem was that everyone was smart, so this was just a clash of brains. J was aware of the situation, Baz wanted what was his, and Jessica was willing to do whatever to help. That was the dangerous part of them, was that she followed blindly in love no matter what happened.
"No, it's not an issue. I just have some stuff to do later, and I have to pick Nicky up from school so it's not going to take that long right?"
"It shouldn't take that long unless you are Morgan decide to not play by the rules"
It was at this point that Nicky understood exactly what the lawyer situation was. Even though J told her to stay away, she didn't have an issue with Jessica, and she believed she was a smart as they were. Jessica on the other hand didn't want to involve the young girl but if she had to figure out what was going on, she had no choice.
"So, am I taking you to school before I go shopping?" The blonde sister asked flickering her eyes between the teens.
J agreed to let Nicky go and he hoped that everything was going to go smoothly. He hadn't had a problem with his aunt until the whole situation with Smurf in jail. He didn't want to think that Jessica was going to turn her back on everyone, but she had already been past that point.
"Can I hook up my phone to your Jeep so we can listen to music on the way there?" Nicky asked Jessica while grabbing her phone out of her pocket to get Spotify ready.
"Yeah, that's cool. Please just don't play any country or any of this new rap music"
Nicky smiled and nodded while heading to the front door. "You don't like any of the music that's on the radio? The best artists are around right now"
Jessica sighed playfully, got out of her seat and through the apple in the trash. "Are you forgetting that I grew up in the 2000s? I was a huge NSYNC fan, it looks like I'm now going to have to give you a lesson on good music"
She had to moved over to the kitchen aisle to grab her keys and J took advantage to chase after Nicky. They had both reached the front door, and he looked behind him to make sure neither of them was there.
"If she starts asking questions do not answer them" He told her lowly with the serious expression on his face.
"I know J, I'm not an idiot. I'll see you later, okay?"
Once Jessica grabbed her car keys, she peered down the hall and saw them talking. She turned back to Baz to get a word in as well. "Have fun... And please don't start a fight in the middle of the office"
"Why do you always assume that I'm going to start a fight with someone?"
"Because you always fight with me, we've done that since we've been kids... And because when you don't get your way, that's what always happens"
The second Jessica dropped Nicky off at school she raced to her next destination. Even though she told Baz that she had grocery shopping to do, she had one more plan up her sleeve that no one knew about.
She had been sitting in the same chair as Craig and Deran had the previous day. Jessica thought it was about time she visited Smurf, but she had to make it unannounced because Smurf would never want to meet with her. On top of it, Baz wouldn't want her to go either, but this was something that she felt she had to do.
She picked at her powder blue nails, waiting for her mother to step out in an orange tracksuit. Jessica had no idea how this interaction was going to go but at this point she had to get these things off of her chest. There was no turning back but there was moving forward, and that's all she had been trying to do.
The guard had ushered Smurf into the room, and she had figured it was one of the boys coming to visit her again but stopped in her tracks when she seen her daughter. She hung back momentarily, checked her emotions, and strolled over in Smurf fashion.
Jessica was taken back that Smurf was in dark blue and not orange, so she had figured it was a cop at first. When she looked up, she hadn't expected Smurf to be staring down at her. The Cody matriarch had picked up the phone calmly leaving Jessica to hesitantly do so as well. They had both lifted the phone to their ears, but no one said anything for a couple seconds.
"Hi...How are you doing?" Jessica asked, completely surprised by her nervous tone. She wanted to remain calm but seeing Smurf in jail instantly changed her mood.
"This is exactly where I wanted to be. Why do you care? Did Baz send you to snoop?"
Jessica had watched her mother while chewing on her pinky nail for a second. Smurf knew that he had no idea she was there because if he did, he would have been with her. Baz was never going to pay Smurf a visit no matter the circumstance. In all honesty she never thought Jessica would either, but she had always craved a mother figure.
"No, I came here on my own. To be honest, I didn't want to but if this is the last time, I'm going to see you..." She trailed off and switch the phone to her other ear to stop the picking.
"What, planning my death already? Sounds convenient"
"No, this is the only time that I'm going to see you again. You wouldn't want me here anyway"
"You're right, why would I want you here? You betrayed the family, how's that working out for you?"
"I didn't just do this for me, I did it for my sister"
Even though Jessica and Julia hadn't been close since their fallout, she still never got to make amends with her. It was wrong that Jessica didn't even know she died, and it wasn't fair that she hadn't been invited to the funeral. She held a resentment to that because despite the problems they had Julia was still her big sister and had looked out for her when they were kids.
"You know Jessica, I've never heard you talk about Julia so much but since she's been dead all you ever do is bring her up"
"Maybe that's because I'm as guilty as you are, we all are. We didn't help Julia like we should have, you helped me but never her. Did you ever wonder why she turned to drugs? Why Craig constantly does what he does? Why I've gone to rehab six times? Have you ever thought about that?"
At this point in her life, Jessica was done hiding and was done playing games with Smurf the last few years had been rocky between them, but things had only escalated since she came back into the family. She was old enough to understand Smurfs motives, but she could never understand how she lived with herself.
Smurf could tell where this conversation was going, and it wasn't like they hadn't gone there before. She could never understand why Jessica constantly blamed her for everything when she had done nothing wrong to her family in her eyes. Putting her forearms on the table, Smurf leaned closer towards the glass.
"Why do you always blame everything on me? You've done that ever since you were a child. It was my fault you fell off of your bike, it was my fault that you didn't have friends. All of you made your own decisions so it's your job to lie in them"
"So, you're not going to take any blame in Julia's addiction and overdose?" Smurf would never admit to anything, but Jessica had hoped that there would have been some sort of breakthrough.
"Why should I? I'm not the one who put the needle in her arm, now did I? I'm not the one who blows my money like Craig does. I'm also not the one who goes into the medicine cabinet and takes any kind of pill they can find" Smurf knew the weaknesses of each of her children and it was easy to grab a hold of it. She wasn't going to take the blame when they had all been doing those drugs themselves.
"And you can't seem to figure out why three of your kids are drug addicts? You can't understand why Julia and I had a numb our pain?"
This conversation was going to go in a direction that neither of them had wanted to go in. Jessica had no choice but to lay her feelings on the table because she had counted on this being the last time she see her mother. She had spoken numerous times of how hard her life was growing up, but Jessica felt that she could confront it head on now.
"I necessarily wouldn't call your brother an addict. As for you and your sister, the two of you messed each other up, I had nothing to do with it. Why do you think that I'm always to blame for how you grew up?" Smurf asked her calmly, not even trying to see where Jessica had been coming from.
"Because you were never my mother!" She could hear her voice echo around the hollow room, and Jessica was lucky they were the only ones meeting. "You were a mother to everyone else but me. Javi and Baz who are not even biologically yours had better treatment than I did. The second I grew up; you threw me away and never touched me again. You did the exact same to Julia because I saw it. Who's next, Lena? Are you just going to toss her when she turns sixteen or are you going to throw her out because she's not blood related?"
"You really expect this to turn into a fairy tale, don't you? You know that Baz is using you Jessica, that's all he's ever done to you. He did the same with Julia and you just don't see it"
"Can you just take the blame for once in your life?" Jessica pleaded, knowing it was never going to happen but part of her still believed it. "This isn't about Baz; this is about me. You don't see the damage you did to your own kids"
"Getting you knocked up at sixteen seemed like a pretty good idea, right? I took care of you, I raised you into the woman you are today"
"Is that a fucking joke?" Jessica told her mother, the humor and anger mixing in her voice. She leaned back and put the phone on the table in such shock that Smurf had believed that.
In Smurfs' eyes, she could not do anything wrong and that she raised her children fine. She was starting to believe that ever since Baz came into the family, the problems began and that he was bound to turn on her because he had always been greedy.
Jessica couldn't help but to pause and try to comprehend what exactly was going on. It was humorous to her as Smurf was seeing herself on a pedestal while she left all the children to drowned. Smurf watched her intently, knowing that she was getting a rise out of her easily. Jessica bit her lip hard, put the phone back up to her ear and leaned towards the glass.
"You didn't do a damn thing. You can sit there and praise yourself all you want when in reality I raised myself. You would have raised me to be weak, to rely on you so you could have the upper hand just like you did to all of my brothers. I'm everything you hate. I'm strong, opinionated, I can take care of myself and lastly I can survive without you"
"The only reason you are saying that is because I'm behind bars. You would never, ever dare to say that if there wasn't a wall between us right now"
"That may be the truth but I'm not afraid of you anymore"
"You are still the weak, naive, little girl you always were" If Jessica was going to hit hard with the facts, then Smurf was going to as well. There was no bouncing back from what happened so all bets were off the table. "You could never stand unless one of your brothers had your back. I did everything in my power to keep you guys safe, to keep food on the table and to keep a roof over your heads. At this point Jessica, our relationship is through I don't give a damn what you think about me"
The younger Cody had laughed faintly into the phone before she rubbed her forehead. Jessica couldn't help but find humor in the situation because of how defensive Smurf was getting. Her ego was sitting on the table and Jessica only wanted to come to some sort of agreement. That could have meant that they made up, or that they hated each other but Jessica wanted to be on the right page as her.
Taking a deep breath, Jessica was piecing the words in her head before speaking. "It's become so clear as I got older that you are just intimidated by other women and I'm sorry you feel that way. I did nothing wrong as a kid, but you constantly disowned me, do you realize what kind of damage that does?"
She had no idea why she kept asking Smurf questions because her mother was never going to actually answer them. It would have been nice for her to acknowledge that she and Julia were separated from their brothers but just can do that was never going to happen.
"I'm not intimidated by you but whatever lets you sleep at" Smurf smirked at her and wiggled slightly in her seat, wishing she could get closer to Jessica's face. "You mark my words; I know Baz better than you think you know him. She's only using you so he can get your brothers on his side and once that's over and done with, then you're pushed away too. He's never going to settle with one woman, he never has"
"Except you right? I mean that was the whole issue with Catherine, you couldn't stand that she was taking Baz away from you. We all see you for who you are, and what you are capable of. I thought if I came here, you would give me the truth but..." Jessica trailed off with the shake of her head.
"You know better than that" Smurf simply said.
Scoffing into the phone Jessica couldn't help but smile yet again. She remembered how many times she heard that as a child, it seemed like Jessica had heard it more than any of the others.
"Now you're going to talk to me like I'm fucking five years old again" She could feel her blood boiling in her veins, but she couldn't comprehend why she felt so angry at that.
Shrugging her shoulders, Smurf was going to agree with Jessica's request. "Do you want the truth? Fine, I don't want you to ever come around here again and the second I get out, you're not welcome in this family anymore. You and Baz can go live in your little world and stay away from my family"
"Your family? They're still my family and you don't get to tell me that they are not...When I was growing up, I kept telling myself that I did something wrong for you to dislike me. I could see how different you were with Julia and I; I couldn't figure out why. You want to know what my truth is?"
Growing up in the Cody household had its perks. They all had fun, they got along most of the time and they were always protective of one another. At the same time being a female meant you were not going to last, that Smurf was always going to be in first place. Jessica knew that her relationship with Baz was what made Julia hate her, and she was going to regret never making up with her before her overdose. However, she felt like she could earn the redemption for the two of them while speaking her honesty.
Smurf was well prepared to hear whatever Jessica was going to say. The damage was done, the bridge was burnt, and their relationship was over. It didn't make a difference to her though, she still had all of her boys no matter what.
Jessica hesitated for a second, took a glance around the room and then look Smurf straight in her blue eyes. "I found it easier to hate you than to try and love you because that never got me any points now did it?"
For a moment, it looked like Smurf had a different emotion in her eyes. Jessica wasn't sure if she had been seeing things, but it seemed like it was a clear message of their dysfunctional mother and daughter bond. It was hard to say out loud, but that was how Jessica forced herself to grow up. She didn't have much of a choice since she didn't have either parent, but it was one way to help her cope.
"What's that saying? What is our family motto again? May we all get what we want but we not deserve?" Jessica questioned intently also recalling how many times she heard that growing up. "This time around I'm getting what I want, and you are getting what you deserve"
Ripping the phone away from her ear, Jessica slammed the phone down and quickly got up from the seat. She didn't want to listen to Smurf say anything else that was the last thing she wanted her to hear. Jessica moved as fast as she could out of the jail and back out into the parking lot.
As she climbed into her Jeep, she froze after starting the engine as she was trying to collect her thoughts. Leaning back in her seat while taking another deep breath, Jessica pounded her fist on the steering wheel before leaning her head completely back. Her emotions were all over the place and she wasn't sure if she should feel angry, happy, or distraught.
She was going to have to keep this all to herself as she didn't want Baz to know about the visit. Jessica stared at the tan building but still couldn't bring herself to move, even though things were changing before, Jessica knew they were permanently damaged forever.
J had stood inside of the building where Smurf's lawyer resided. Things had gone south quickly, something neither him nor Baz expected. This was going to cause a new problem and at the moment, the young boy didn't want to deal with it.
Baz pushed the doors as hard as he could and stormed outside into the California heat. Things were supposed to go in his favor, but it took a shift the second he stepped foot in the building. Smurf was always going to be one step ahead and that made Baz's vein boil.
Taking control of the family was one thing but it was supposed to be easy with Smurf locked up. It looked like every move he tried making ended up taking a detour in a bad direction. Baz couldn't get anything to go in his favor with her around there wasn't anything else he could do to put her away.
"Did you tell her we were coming or did Smurf?" He asked J once he came outside.
"I didn't even know about it until this morning"
"So, she told Smurf ahead of time... What's this game you two are trying to play? Hm?"
When Morgan had gotten a call from Baz about another meeting, she went to Smurf and ordered to figure out what was going on. She was going to do whatever Smurf wanted and Baz wasn't going to stop coming around. She wasn't sure what the meeting was going to be about, but she'd only figured that he had wanted all of the money back.
Smurf had told her to steer clear of the couple if either of them had come around. So once she set up the meeting, Morgan never went to work which left J and Baz hanging and balance.
J stood outside of the building, on the sidewalk while putting his hands in his hoodie pockets. "I'm not doing anything; I'm just following what Smurf is wanting me to do. I had no idea what was going on until you called me"
Baz had been standing in the middle of the street but had whipped around out of anger. "You know, she hated your mom, and I mean she hated her" The venom in his own voice made the sentence come off as vicious as possible. "It was always the same with Jessica, they weren't like any of us boys, they couldn't get away with whatever they wanted"
He was going to try to play nice for as long as he could, but this was Baz's breaking point. If nice wasn't going to work, he was going to play dirtier and he was going to do whatever it took to get the properties.
"Julia was always smarter than Smurf and she figured that out at a young age. Smurf pushed your Mom aside and focus all of her attention on us. Julia couldn't handle it, that's why she always left"
J looked around momentarily not knowing why Baz was going off on him. "That's not what I heard..." He said quietly and then it focused his tension on him because he knew Baz was staring directly at him. "You slept with my mom and Jessica, she kicked them out instead of you. I've already heard about what happened, Jessica had some pretty strong feelings about it"
It wasn't that much of a secret that Jessica had an issue with what happened because she considered that the point where her life started to fall apart. She had talked to Baz about it before, so he knew all about it, but he didn't know that she talked to jay. It was either her or Smurf that said something because he knew Julia would have never brought it up.
"Are you trying to turn her against me right now? I think you've done a good enough job of things so far"
"I was only trying to clear the story... Smurf also told me that you are my dad, is that true?"
Baz blinked in confusion before shaking his head with a laugh. He wasn't surprised that Smurf was trying to fill his head with lies and stories because that is something she had always done. Get one of them under her thumb and then the whole game changed.
"Let me tell you a story that she'll never tell. She had this guy that she was flirting with, trying to get in with him so we could pull a job and steal all of this money. One day he came by the house, Julia was lying outside, high out of her mind like usual"
J had been hanging onto every word as Baz was right, this was a story he hadn't heard before. Julia had never mentioned who his dad was, it always was hanging in balance. He had gone through his childhood with different boyfriends, or even one-night stands so J never had a chance to know half of his family.
He got closer to J, close enough that he would hear every word clearly. "Pope and I were in the house, we walked into the kitchen and guess what we saw? This guy, on top of your mom, pounding away as if no one was watching. Pope and I beat the shit out of him, Smurf got mad that Julia interfered with the job. She disappeared after that...Nine months later, you showed up when she came back"
"What?" J spoke, hardly above a whisper. "I thought...My mom was raped?"
"Ask Pope, he was there. Ask Jess, the guy was always hitting on her, and she was sixteen. Better yet, ask Smurf but don't expect the truth to come out of her mouth"
"My Mom never told me anything, I didn't even know I had family until she died"
The Cody family were always good at hiding secrets, how matter how deep they were. If the truth did come out, none of them said a word about it and kept it in a little box. Speaking about Julia was always off the table, they weren't allowed to mention her name if Smurf were ever present. It was an upspoken rule in the household, they could never bring up their sister or else.
"She hated all of us" J had believed that Baz was talking about Smurf but instead, he was speaking about Julia. "She hated Craig for cutting off her drug supply. She never bonded with Deran because he was too young. Pope was mad that I stole Julia away, so he followed her around like a lost puppy. She hated Jessica because of me, and Smurf? She hated Smurf for everything that she put her through"
For a moment, he looked like he didn't want to answer or admit the truth. "She hated me because I tried keeping her clean. Julia didn't want to get any better and I was the one pushing her towards it. When Jess and I hooked up, she took that along with the drug habit to never talk to me again"
"What about you? Why did she hate you?" J was only suspicious because he was still trying to figure out how many times Baz had avoided his dad question.
J took a deep breath, pinched the bridge of his nose and was speechless. This was a huge bomb that had been dropped on him and this was something that he was going to have to talk to Smurf about. Once again, he was caught in the middle of family drama without any answer. He knew that nothing good was going to come out of it and that the truth would still be hanging in the balance.
"Okay, so if what you're saying is the truth..." He stopped talking for a second then looked at Baz. "I'm supposed to believe you with this? You want all of the properties; you want all of Smurf's things so how do I not know that you're lying just to get them back?"
"I'm trying to tell you about what happened with your mom and you're accusing me of lying?"
"Yeah, I am. You've been trying to turn Nicky against me, I know what Jessica is trying to do. I'm not going to sign anything over to you just because you want them"
The two men had stared each other down and the only thing they heard were the passing cars. Both of them were at a standing point, they didn't trust one another, and they were never going to. This was the beginning of a fight that had been brewing and would continue to collide.
"I don't need to lie to get them back. One way or another, they will be mine again. I wasn't sleeping with Julia when she got pregnant. I sure as hell didn't sleep with her after because she was far gone at that point"
Baz took there for another minute, turned away and headed back to his car. Their conversation was done and over with, he had to come up with another idea yet again. Things were far from over on both sides. Smurf would call the shots in jail, J would deal them out and Baz would be left to pick up the scraps.
He was going to call another family meeting in order to turn them against J for good. It was going to be the family against J and Smurf, that's what it had to be done. Baz wanted to move on from this, he didn't want to do this for the rest of his life, but J would stand his ground. If this kid was in the way, he would step on him as well...Only problem was Smurf was planning something big, that Baz and Jessica would never walk away from.