A/N: Hey, you guys. Sorry it's taken me so long to update this story. Life has been throwing some rather major curve balls at me as of late and been making it difficult for me to find time for signing online. Regardless, I'm trying to work this story into my schedule more and get some writing done in my spare time before and after work. It's slow-coming but helps me at least stay a little bit more productive throughout my days. Hopefully I'll be able to update more over the holiday season, and granted I can sort a few things out over the following month or so, I'm going to try and create myself an update schedule come the beginning of the new year. We'll see though. Right now I'm just kind of playing things by ear and working on this story when I feel like it.

I've been in a bit of a writing slump for quite some time now but am doing anything I can to lift myself out of it. You guys have no idea how badly I want to finish this story. There's still a lot of work that needs to be done for it though. I plan on revising a few future scenes as I get around to ficafying them and don't even get me started on writing an actual ending to this monster of a story. I will finish it though. No doubt about it. So long as I have a passion for the story and people willing to read it, I'll never give up on this role play, even if it takes me another 6 or more years to complete. Here's hoping it doesn't take me that long though. XD

In any case, hope you guys enjoy this quick update! More to come in the hopefully near future!

ZADR Orange Chapter 180

Warnings: Extreme OOCness

Rating: M for later chapters

Disclaimer: We do not own Invader Zim, nor any of the characters from it. We do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Zim: Notgonnadie

Dib: Me

Enjoy. =3

Shaking his head at Rose's observations, Zim couldn't help but feel as though Dib's changed behavior had started far longer ago, long before they'd even met Jack and Rose or found out he was expecting. "...I don't know…He's pregnant…I thought that was it..." he sent Rose an almost exhausted look, wanting so badly to believe that that was all there was to it but knowing full well that was anything but the case.

Rose sighed at the look Zim was sending her, having been trying to convince herself for quite a long time now that Dib's pregnancy was the only contributing factor to his sudden emotional outbursts. "I-I thought so too...B-But now I'm not so sure...M-Maybe that's all it is, but..." she sighed again, unable to shake the niggling feeling she felt deep within her gut.

Pulling his knees to his chest, Zim sighed as well.

"Do you want me to go and talk to him?" Rose rested a hand on his shoulder, rubbing up and down his arm.

Zim nodded his head sadly. "Please?" he said, not so certain the other would willingly speak to him in that moment.

"Alright." Rose turned to head out of the kitchen and towards the stairs, assuming Dib had gone back upstairs to the guest bedroom. Stopping in her tracks right outside the kitchen when she found Dib sitting against the outer wall however, she knelt down next to him, the hybrid currently staring down at his knees, which he had pulled in close to his chest.

"...He hates me, doesn't he?" Dib hid his face back in his arms, having overheard everything they had been saying about him.

Realizing this, Rose sighed before smiling sadly at him. "No, Dib. He loves you." she said before reaching out a hand to place on his shoulder reassuringly.

Dib could only shake his head slowly at that though. "No...He loved the old me...But the way I am now. S-Something's wrong with me...Something's changed. He doesn't like the way I am now! Tak was right. I am weak. Without a purpose in life, I'm as weak as they come, and Zim doesn't like that about me." his voice shook despite his best efforts not to break down again.

"But Dib, you HAVE a purpose." Rose moved her hand from his shoulder to place on his belly. "This is your purpose now. You're a mother, Dib. That is perhaps the greatest responsibility in the entire universe. It's more difficult than saving the world, and only a few people can do it." she said, rubbing a thumb comfortingly over the kicking in the hybrid's stomach.

"But what about Zim?...He gave up so much more for me because of this...He gave up his mission, he gave up HIS PEOPLE, HIS HOME! Hell, he even nearly gave up his life! He gave it all up to be with me. But I'm not the one he wants anymore. The smeets aren't the purpose I was looking for in life. They can't make me the way he remembers me! He wants me to be the way I was when we first met! That's the side of me he fell in love with! Not the side I'm showing now!"

"Oh, Dib..."

"Dib…" Zim cut in suddenly, having heard the yelling from the other room. Stepping out of the kitchen, he then crouched down next to him, looking sad. "I'll love you no matter what, Dib..." he said, shifting his gaze off to one side as he felt guilty now for making Dib feel that way with his words.

"I'm not the way you want me to be though! You gave up so much yet I can't bring myself to be what you gave all that stuff up for! I'm such a screw up! It's not fair to you! It's not fair that I can't be the way you want me to be!"

"But you're you! That's all that matters." Zim looked back at him frantic now, worried Dib would try to leave him again. Leaning forward, he then tried to pull him in close. "Please…Just don't leave me..." he said in a pleading voice, hating the fact that the other was always running away from him anytime they had a disagreement of any type.

Dib balled up a bit when Zim pulled him in close. "...The me you fell in love with left a long time ago...A-And he isn't coming back...I don't see how you could want me the way I am now...The me I am now is constantly hurting you..." he broke down into his arms.

Antennas wilting at those words, Zim closed his eyes sadly and pulled Dib even closer. "Dib... Come here..." he held him tight, letting him bury his face in his chest. "I'll always love you, Dib..." he said before reaching up to pet back a bit of Dib's hair comfortingly.

Finding Zim's chest to nuzzle his face into, Dib sobbed gently to himself in it.

"Shhh…It's okay..." Zim held him close, rubbing his back gently and ruffling his hair.

"Wh-What's wrong with me...?" Dib's voice shook. "Why am I always hurting you?!" he then said in an all too frustrated tone.

Zim sighed. "I…I don't know... Dib... W-What would you say... to seeing a therapist?" he asked, no longer able to deny the fact that there was definitely something wrong with the other but hesitant to imply such a thing.

"A-A therapist?" Dib looked up at Zim teary-eyed, remembering all the times he had been forced to sit down with school counselors and such in the past, each one always saying the same thing about him. It wouldn't matter whether he went to see a therapist or not. It would just end the same way it always did, he was sure.

Zim sighed at the look Dib was sending him before nodding his head and going to nuzzle him. "I could go with you..." he offered, unsure whether the other would actually take him up on such an offer but wanting to try anyways.

Dib's antennae could only wilt even more at that suggestion. "...It won't help..." he reached up his hands to yank down on his antennas, shaking his head and pulling his knees to himself. "It won't help! It never does!" he didn't want to be sent back there, the fact that Zim was the one trying to send him there hurting him more than anything else.

Zim held onto Dib tighter at that response. "Dib…There is something wrong... I don't know what... but there is…You can't deny that...I…I just want to help you..." he said desperately, just wanting to try anything that might help the other at this point.

"Why are you doing this to me?!" Dib shook his head even more, not wanting to listen or even believe a word Zim was saying to him. He didn't want "professional" help. All he wanted was to be left alone as he began rocking a bit in his spot.

"Please, Dib... Just try it? I'll stay with you the whole time..."

"Noo...Noo...Noo...Noo...Nooooo...Not again...Nooo..." Dib began repeating over and over again, shaking his head some more as he curled in on himself, hiding away from the other now. "Just leave me alone! It's not going to do me any good!" he then screamed at the Irken, hating the fact that Zim of all people was even suggesting such an alternative.

"Dib..." Zim's eyes widened at that reaction. "P-Please...Do it for me?" he begged despite the fact that he was fighting a losing battle here now.

Letting out a wet whimper, Dib peeked a single eye open, able to see from the look on Zim's face that the other was serious about wanting to put him through this again. "And what do you think any of this will accomplish?! What more do you think I'll gain other than another person added to the list of people who think I'm insane?!" he exclaimed hysterically, his frustration with the other only growing more out of control by the second.

Zim's antennas drooped at those words. "I don't think you're insane…and neither does Gaz…Jack and Rose don't think so either…So if you ask me, the amount of people who think you're SANE is actually growing." he said in a weak attempt to defend his case.

"Then what would even be the point in me going to see a therapist?!" Dib said through grit teeth, a hint of anger seeping into his words now despite his best efforts not to explode on the other and say anything he might regret in the long run. "I already know a therapist would think I'm insane! My dad does, Tak does, the entire school does! If you don't think I'm insane, then why do you even want me to go in the first place?!" he exploded in a fit of rage, throwing his hands down from his face to glare at the Irken furiously.

A/N: And there you have it for Chapter 180. Until next time~