A/N: Thanks Greystwilight fan, Patsy and Mandyg67... Where is everybody? Would love to hear from some of you, esp if you haven't commented before, or if you are a fan of a pairing besides Meredith!

Anyway...

Enjoy!

"I have to pee," April squirmed on the exam table as the nurse spread ultrasound jelly smoothly on her small rounded bump. They were into the second trimester now, and Jackson marveled every day at how a simple act together could create a human being.

"Just a few more minutes," He squeezed his wife's hand and kept his eye on the monitor, knowing she was pouting. Carefully suppressing a mile-wide grin, he focused on the image in front of him. April was so cute when she pouted, and she hated when he pointed it out, which made him love her even more.

"Just a little..." Connie murmured as she moved the wand in a circular motion. Jackson noticed the way April bit her lip with nervousness as her deep green eyes studied the screen.

"It's gonna be fine, April," he soothed.

"I know," she smiled. "Noah keeps rubbing my belly like I'm some kind of genie or something."

Jackson raised an eyebrow, "He still does that?" He'd caught them a few times. Noah, sensitive as he was, liked to cuddle with mommy and the baby bump, often whispering to it, like he was sharing a secret.

"Yup," April replied softly, finally relaxed as she lifted her arm over her head. "It's fine, I think it's adorable."

"Hmm," Jackson once again looked at the monitor.

They waited while Connie worked. Jackson shifted, shouldn't she know by now? "Everything okay?" he asked.

"Um," Connie said, "Just..." She manuevered the wand, and under the gentle woosh-woosh, of the ultrasound, they saw their baby.

Jackson stared, there was the head... the shoulders... He blinked, and his heart skipped a few beats "It's... it's a girl."

"A girl?" April gasped.

"Yes," Connie confirmed, "it is a girl..." But her mouth curved into a slight frown and her brows furrowed as she studied the screen...

"What?" Jackson asked, his chest feeling tight. Gone was the hopeful relief, the happy thoughts of pink, pink, pink... Now anxiety clenched and uneasiness caused him to lean forward, "What is it?" He asked, outwardly calm and detached, for his wife.

Connie regarded the two, a solemn expression on her face. No, he thought. No, no, no...

"Jackson?" April squeezed his hand and he felt her thoughts. "Connie? What is it? What's wrong with my baby?"

"It's hard to tell," Connie said. "But it appears that there's some sort of mass near her heart... I'm going to have to call for a consult..."

xxx

"Did you bring it?" Meredith asked as she kneeled on the floor beside Zola, who was sitting at a child's size table and chair in the daycare, coloring with a purple crayon.

"Yeah, I got it," Alex grumbled. He shoved the bundle practically in her face before crouching down to sit next to her.

"Hey, careful! That doll is old!" she picked up the cloth covered item and unwrapped it. What was up with Alex? She wondered. She'd noticed some tension between him and Jo, but today, Alex was a tight ball of... anger.

"Anatomy Jane? Seriously?" he remarked, and she was sure he meant it to be playful, but it sounded bitter and harsh.

"So?"

"With optional pregnancy parts?" His eyebrow raised as she fiddled with the doll, smoothing out her hair and fixing the gown that covered her.

"So?" Meredith shook her head. He didn't get it. Not that she expected him to. He was a guy. He never had children of his own. And Alex... just wasn't the sentimental type. Not like this anyway.

"How old is that thing anyway?" He asked, proving her point. "She looks like a ghoul."

Meredith bristled at his comment. "Shut up. She's not that old, I'm not that old." Her mother had given her this doll. She remembered sitting on the kitchen table with Ellis as she removed each part and named it, instructing her to repeat it back to her and put the piece back in where it belonged.

She remembered her mother using it to describe where babies come from.

She remembered... Days after Derek died, in a moment of clumsiness, she'd knocked some stuff off the dresser and there was the doll, pregnant and staring blankly at her. In a daze, she picked it up, collapsed on the bed and stared back at it as she rubbed her flat stomach.

Derek was gone, but she wasn't alone.

Alex's muttering caused her to look up, squinting at him. She was so sick of his stupid behavior. "You're grouchier than usual," she observed. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," said Alex. He avoided her glare and busied himself with a box full of toys, picking out some pieces for a race track.

Whatever was bothering him, he could tell her. She wasn't whole and healed yet, but she was getting there, she could feel it. He was her best friend right now, and she wanted to help him. Meredith shook her head, "It's not nothing. We don't do this. You don't cover things up, that's not the Alex I know."

Her 'Person' scowled again and ignored her as he dug out more pieces for the race track. She let him stew and turned to Zola. "Hey Zola... see what I have here? This is Anatomy Jane. She's a special doll..."

Zola looked up from her drawing and pressed a finger to her lips as she regarded the doll. Meredith pulled up the gown to reveal a pregnant stomach on the doll.

"Baby in tummy?" Zola asked. Her english wasn't that good, but it didn't matter, the parenting classes told her to just talk and behave normally, making sure that Zola understood her, and she would pick it up pretty quickly.

Meredith swallowed, unexpectedly reminded of her own child. "Yeah... yes," she said quickly. Carefully, she removed the parts, "Look, this is the chubble, and this part is the slivvy..." she pointed at the various pieces as she pulled them out and laid them on the table. Zola put her crayon down and reached for the doll. "You wanna play with her?" Meredith encouraged. "It's okay, here..." she handled the doll over to Zola who regarded Jane curiously.

Zola took the doll and ran her little brown fingers over it. She turned Jane over and moved her arms and legs. Meredith kept talking, "When I was a little girl, my mommy gave this doll to me," she said. "You know what a mommy is?" she asked. Zola shrugged and walked Jane around on the table.

"A mommy..." she bit her lip, "A mommy is someone who loves you very much, a mommy is someone who wants to take care of you with all her heart." She wanted to say so much more, but there weren't words to describe the powerful urge in her being.

"No mommy..." Zola said as she removed Jane's chubble.

"I know... you don't have a mommy right now, but...I could, I could be your mommy." Her lower lip twitched as she waited for a response from Zola, but the girl was oblivious and focused on Anatomy Jane. Meredith chose to rub Zola's back instead of pushing the subject. I could, she thought. I want to be your Mama.

Time for a subject change before her hormones got the best of her. "Alex..." Meredith prompted.

"You tell me something, I tell you something." He replied as he built his race track. Another boy toddled over and sat near Alex to watch.

It was an old game they played:

"Lexie left me for Sloan". He told her once with a shrug after the shooting.

"I told April she could be a mom, and I don't think I can... I'm terrified," she replied, her hand resting on her tiny bump.

He sipped his beer, "You'll be a great Mom, Mer," he said without hesitation.

"You'll find someone that really loves you, Alex." She said as they swung on the swing.

There was something healing about their mutual confessions.

Her mind flashed back to the earlier scene in the elevator. Penny's pale shocked face as she screamed at her. "I... um... I met the new resident today," she said

"Oh yeah, I read the email." he murmured. "Isn't she on your service?"

"She's from Dillard." Meredith said.

Alex blinked. "Oh," he said and shrugged.

"No, she's from Dillard. She was there... when I... was her patient."

"What?" Alex's brown eyes flashed at her, confused, shocked.

"She was an intern, Alex... she told me... and I..." Meredith shook her head, willing the anger that curled in her to go away. "You tell me yours," she rasped.

The little boy near him handed him a piece of race track and Alex took it, clicking it in place. "Amber lied." he said. "And Jo knew she lied. That Frank Martin dude? He's not who he says he is... he's trouble... he's after Amber..." He fit another piece in, the track starting to resemble a figure eight. "He's after Amber's kid, and she... she didn't trust me. She didn't trust me to protect her. She ran off... She's got a freaking gun, Mer." He rubbed the back of his neck, making his frustration clear.

"Alex..." Meredith breathed, reaching to rub his shoulder.

"How does this happen? How does everyone I care about get screwed? Amber... I was never there for her Mer, I never... I had to choose, them or this, and I chose this but-" He struggled, realizing that he was in a daycare with little kids running amok. "I don't... I don't know what to do."

Meredith helped Zola put the 'Jelly Pouch' into Anatomy Jane, her mind whirring as she tried to think of what to say. "I'm not gonna tell you what to do," she said. "Amber's made her choice. She has a gun, she already figured you out of the equation. I don't know why Jo didn't tell you then, but she told you now, so that has to count for something, right?"

Alex sighed loudly and Meredtih raised an eyebrow at him. "We're not residents anymore," she continued. "We made it. We grew up. You have a house. And a girlfriend who loves you, post-it-on-the-wall loves you. Who's not crazy or sick or pining after someone else. You have plenty of friends and allies here if you need them." She put her fingers over Zola's tiny ones, helping her snap Jane's Abdomen in place. Now all put together, Zola held the doll up for everyone to see and made little mommy noises as she cradled it. "I'm not gonna tell you what to do, because you already know, Alex." Meredith said.

"Shi-" Alex took note of the little boy racing two cars in the track he completed, "Crap." he said.. He picked up a red car and spun the wheels with his finger. Then he sighed, "That new resident? She was just an intern Mer. We all screwed up our first year. Cut her some slack." He laid a car down on the track and pushed it. "Hell, maybe she knows something."

"Yeah," Meredith said as she looked out the window of the Daycare to see a smiling Janet here to pick up Zola and take her home. "Crap."

xxx

Penny stared at her pager. That's it, she thought. They're going to cancel my contract. It beeped again. The Chief was paging her. Finally she stood up and swallowed. Whatever it was, she'd face it. It couldn't be half as bad as facing Grey.

She knocked on the Chief's door. "You wanted to see me sir?" she asked.

"Dr. Blake," Hunt said, "Have a seat." She noticed another man there, an older man, wait... was that Dr. Webber? She'd heard of him. A near legend in his own right.

Answering her question, Chief Hunt nodded to him, "Dr. Blake, this is Dr. Webber." He stated.

"Hello, pleased to meet you, it's an honour sir,"

Webber was kind and gracious. "A pleasure, Dr. Blake."

"Anyway," Hunt said, "I paged you here to... apologize."

"Sir?"

"I've been caught up in some personal matters, and I didn't consider your experience with Dr. Grey. I knew you were involved with her trauma, but I guess I thought..." He drifted off. "I wasn't thinking. As Chief, it is my responsibilty to know my staff, be aware of any problems that arise, and work with and advise accordingly." He sighed, "Anyway, I apologize. I should have, at the very least, informed you that Dr. Grey was your patient, and given you the option to choose which service you wanted to work under."

Penny took a moment to consider his words. She was thankful for the apology, it had placated her feelings a little. But she wasn't sure that she should work here. She didn't know... Seeing Grey had brought up a lot of memories for her...

Meredith. She'd learned that name while leaning over her in the jeep, reaching into the woman's purse while fumbling for a pulse. Meredith Grey, her drivers license said. "Meredith..." She called, rubbing her sternum.

"Ohhh..." Meredith responded, stirring slightly, but her eyes remained closed.

"Meredith, stay with me," Penny called loudly. There was so much blood. How could there be so much blood?

"Buh..." Meredith started to say, her hand twitched to her abdomen while tears of pain mingled with blood.

"I know... your baby..." Penny said. "You're going to be fine, we'll get you to the hospital, and you'll be just fine."

"Der..." Meredith slurred, before passing out again.

It was taking too long for the ambulance. Far too long. She called 911 again. "Where's the Goddamn ambulance?" she screamed. Penny had never felt so helpless before in her life. The little roll of gauze she'd pulled from her own first aid kit was already soaked.

The poor 911 operator stuttered out an apology before explaining that due to the shooting, resources had been diverted. An Ambulance and fire truck were coming... but... it could take time.

"Dammit!" she threw her phone down. All she could do was wait. "It's okay, I'm here... hang in there... Just hang in there..."

Moments later, two ambulances and a fire truck had arrived, and the paramedics swooped in.

But still, luck was not on Meredith's side. Freed of the vehicle that was her prison, her condition deteriorated rapidly en route to Seattle Pres. They were still ten minutes out, she wouldnt make it.

Inside the ambulance, the paramedics were arguing. "Dillard!" Penny shouted over them. "Take her to Dillard!"

"But... they're not a trauma centre..." One of them objected.

"They have blood, and an OR, that's all she needs... please... you have to- you can't..." She trailed off, shaking her head. "You have to get her to Dillard... Now."

The medics glanced at each other, and if they needed further convincing, the beeping of the pulse-ox machine did it.

"Her left lung is collapsing!"

"Dammit! Turn this thing around! Now!"

Relief filled Penny as they approached her workplace. It wasn't a trauma center, but it was familiar, and the staff were good people. They would do their very best. But just as they arrived, another ambulance pulled up in front of them.

The paramedics wheeled another pregnant woman out, "My baby... my baby..." she called out weakly.

Penny squeezed Meredith's hand. "It's going to be alright."

Penny cleared her throat and blinked, the memories chased away by her need to be in the present moment. "I think maybe I should be rematched..."

"Dr. Blake," Webber said. "You were top in your class at Dillard, one of the most skilled residents, it's the reason I reccomended you to be hired."

"You... reccomended me, sir?" She asked in awe.

"Yes." he replied resolutely. "Your history with Grey was the only reason not to hire you. He swallowed. "Grey will warm up to you, once she's seen your work ethic. We have an opening for a resident on peads if you like."

"I..."

"Blake," Chief Hunt said, "Dillard was a second rate hospital. You want to learn? You want to achieve? Then Shepherd Grace is the hospital for you. Webber will talk to Dr. Grey, but we can make this work for you if you want it to."

Penny considered it. Webber had reccomended her. He had noticed her. Of all the other residents in Seattle... What Hunt said was true too. Dillard had been going downhill for a long time now, second rate? More like third rate. Ever since her mentor, Dr. Wallace left, everything had gotten much much worse. She nodded, "Yes, I want to stay. I would like to stay."

"Great," Chief Hunt said, "Just so you know, I'm taking leave, so Dr. Webber will be interim Chief while I am away. If you have any concerns, please feel free to talk to him."

"Thanks."

xxx

Maggie had a pretty light workload today, so she was using the spare time to come up with ideas for Zola's welcoming party. She'd been typing in a list on her phone. She should talk to Callie and Arizona to invite Sofia, and Kepner about Noah... and wait... didn't Noah go to a play school? Maybe he could invite some of his friends...

On her way to a consult in OB, she waited for the elevator. When it dinged, she stepped in, her attention still on the list on her phone... Decorations... they needed decorations. What was Zola's favorite color? Purple wasn't it? And she liked those My Little Pony toys... so maybe a pony theme? Okay, balloons, streamers, glitter... oh, crafts! Definitely some crafts... Her thoughts drifted...

"Um excuse me? You're one of April's friends aren't you?"

Maggie turned to see an older woman with long red hair neatly pulled behind her in a half ponytail, her dark green eyes peering out from under long bangs. April's mother, right.

"Well, I haven't known her very long, but yes, I'm Dr. Pierce- uh Maggie, you can call me Maggie." She stuck her hand out.

"Karen Kepner, April's mom, It's a pleasure... A real pleasure. Did I hear right that you're planning a party for Meredith and her youngin?"

"Yes." Maggie smiled at the thought of it. " Just one more home check, and final approval from CPS." Maggie shook her head and added, "Zola's so adorable, and it's nice to see Meredith smiling for once."

"Oh, the poor thing," Karen waved a hand, "After that accident took her child, she was never the same. She had such a rough go of it. Can you imagine? Losing your child at eight months? It had to be horrible... She was laid up for months with recovery and depression. I was overjoyed to hear that she wanted to adopt. I hope I get to meet that child."

"Oh..." Maggie said awkardly as she took in this new information. She'd heard rumors, nurses tales, intern's hushed whispers. But she never took it to heart, and it was never very specific. Just that bad things seemed to happen to Grey. "Well," she mustered as the elevator doors opened at OB. "Maybe you could help? I'd like to invite Noah to the party." She stepped off the elevator and Karen followed, walking with her.

"Oh, that sounds like so much fun!" she exclaimed, clasping her hands together. "I'm sure April will be fine with it. I'm up here to see her now actually, she's getting her ultrasound."

"I'm on my way to a consult," Maggie replied, double checking her pager for the room number: 404. "Maybe I'll check in with you both after?"

"That works out perfectly then!" Karen supplied, as she matched Maggie's stride. Maggie stopped outside the room just as Karen did.

"Okay," Maggie chirped.

"Okay." Karen replied, still standing there.

"Well this is where I'm doing my consult so..."

"Oh," Karen said, her eyes wide. "Your consult is here?" she pointed at the door.

"Yes," Maggie nodded, reaching for the door knob.

"But that's April's room." Karen said.

Maggie's heart hammered in her chest as she realized what or who- rather, she was consulting on. "Oh..."

xxx

Owen handed the last of his files over to Webber. "Well, that should do it. Thank you, for doing this on such short notice. I... my sister," he ran a hand through his short reddish blonde hair, his thoughts flashing to an arid dessert, wind and sand and all the cruelties associated with it. "I have to try and find her."

"I understand." Webber said, leaning against the desk. "Have you talked to Amelia?"

"Uh..."

Richard didn't wait for him to finish. "You need to go to her. You need to let her know how much she means to you alright?" he said, his tone deep and fatherly. "She lost her father, her brother... she left people who cared about her to come here because I asked Meredith to ask her to come here. And now... the two of you..." Richard sighed and looked away. "You just need to go find her. Now."

He didn't say anything else, but Owen knew what he meant. Amelia was an addict, prone to using drugs and alcohol to numb her pain. And now he was causing her pain.

Owen said nothing more as he exited the office and headed for the stairs.

xxx

Penny stared absentmindedly at her tablet while she waited for the elevator. She had to catch up on her pediatric assignments before her next rotation. Webber told her to take the rest of the day off, but she thought she would use this time to familiarise herself now that she had access.

The doors opened, and she stepped in, engrossed in a patient's chart. She pressed the close button and noticed that the main floor button was pushed.

"Oh," she heard a gasp behind her.

Blake turned and saw Dr. Grey's startled expression, her palm against her chest as if to protect herself.

"Oh... I-" she didn't know what to say. Dr. Grey had made it very clear last time how she felt about penny's presence, and now here they were, in an elevator together. She spun back to face the door and hastily pressed the button for the floor below. "I'll get off at the next level." She said. it was the least she good do.

A long sigh behind her indicated Grey's acceptance of this compromise, and Penny hugged her tablet closer. Innwardly she warred with herself. Was her earlier confession to Meredith too hasty? She regretted saying anything, she should have kept her mouth shut, bowed to the altar of General Surgery. That's what she should have done.

But she had been pushed, she admitted. Meredith wasn't going to let her go without saying something, and so she told the truth. Part of her was glad it was out, the other part very much torn that Meredith now had a living reminder of the most tragic and devasting event of her life. wandering the hospital

She swallowed, stared at the door until the elevator dinged, and as soon as there was enough space for her to slip through, she did. She hustled quickly down the hall, trying to dampen her own emotional turmoil. She would not cry anymore today.

Was someone calling her name?

She dreaded looking back. She just walked faster, the stairwell doors only feet away. Someone was behind her, following...

She pushed the door open and hopped down the steps with ease.

"Wait!" Someone called as she hit the landing, arm reaching for the bannister to help propel herself down the next flight. Penny glanced up and stopped.

Meredith stood halfway down the stairs, one hand gripping the railing and the other clutching her bag. Out of scrubs, her hair loose around her face, she looked so different. Warmer.

Meredith looked down at her with a watery gaze as she tried to speak.

Penny was frozen to the spot, waiting, wondering what she was going to say...

"Did you see her?" she asked finally, her voice hoarse and cracking, "Did you see my baby?"

xxx

A/N: Whoooie! Alright guys, Seriously! This was so hard to get through! Please Review and let me know what you thought! More to come!

And... on another note, check out young writer Jenabean2002's story Plane Crash. She recently updated with three new chapters, so if you want to, please read and review her story, I'm sure she'd be thrilled to hear from you awesome fans!