Hey guys, i'm back ;o) And hello to the new favs and followers, welcome to my little world.
This is kind of a little fill in chapter. Sorry, next on more action ... promise!
The four of us were quiet when Glenn started to drive towards the gate. "So a double date?!" Glenn joked but no one was laughing, not even Glenn himself. He drove closer to the gate where a man in inmate clothes opened the door. When we past him I looked at the foreigner who gave me a short nod.
"That's Oscar. He and Axel were the only inmates surviving inside the cafeteria for months." Maggie explained.
An unbearable silence filled the car. Out of the corner of my eye I watched Daryl looking outside the window. He was still a mystery, distant but protecting at once. I remembered that a few minutes ago he had touched me and looked me in the eyes wordlessly with a glance beyond words. It was a special moment, there had been a short time of intimacy and fragility until Carol walked in. His touch had felt so good. I wanted to feel this again, feel his warm body. When I saw his head moving I looked down on my hand. Would that happen again? Or was there someone else he began to trust? Suddenly Carol popped into my thoughts.
"So you come to babysit Ella?" Maggie said without turning around. Daryl just sniffed at her question. "Ya all need to be looked after." Glenn speed up, as if he could escape Daryl's words.
Again I watched Daryl who avoided my eyes and held his crossbow tight. I hoped Glenn had brought enough guns or knives so we could defend ourselves. I had my knife still in my boot, but I needed something else to defend myself, a gun would be nice. We drove on until a few houses appeared on the street, but Glenn didn't stop. I watched some walkers which slowly walked up on us as they heard the sound of our car, but Glenn just drove on. They walkers were weak and slow, none of them could reached us. All of a sudden memories flashed through my head. I remembered Alex and the others when we had been on our way and were confronted with two men. My heartbeat speed up just like Glenn speed up the car. Calm down. That won't happen again. I tried to relax, but my breath began to fasten too. I saw Daryl turning to look at me. My chest was rising and falling too quick as to look normal. "What's wrong?" He asked me.
"Nothing." I managed to say as normal as I could. Glenn's eyes found mine in the driving mirror. "We are almost there." He stated.
Ella calm down or you might pass out like last time. Nothing is going to happen! The voice was steady and calm and finally I calmed down too. I inhaled deep and exhaled loudly. Daryl's dark eyes were still watching me with a questioning look. "I am okay." I emphasized and my breathing went finally normal again.
The car stopped. Glen parked in a dead end where houses were welcoming us on both sides of the street. Glenn stepped out of the car first. "Last time we checked the three houses there. Seemed like no one had raided the houses yet, everything untouched. The families must have left in a hurry." He pointed to three big white houses at the end of the street and went to the back of the car while I stepped out too. It was my first time outside the prison. Inhaling the air of freedom I felt kind of safe. The houses looked so inviolate. The sound of a clicking gun ruined my safety thoughts. I turned around and saw the three of them at the trunk, everyone was taking a gun or two. I joined them and Glenn gave me a revolver that looked kind of like Rick's. I was just happy my knife was still in my boot, I didn't know if I could fire with this ragged gun. I wished for a Glock 17 pistol, like the one my father had owned. Besides his crossbow, Daryl took a gun and the huge knife which looked as dangerous as hell.
Glenn closed the trunk. "Me and Maggie will check these houses." He went to the right side of the street and Maggie followed him. She gave me a look I could not interpret as she walked away. "See you later!" I turned to Daryl who looked at the house next to us.
"Shall we?" I asked and made my way to the house, gun raised. Daryl followed me close behind and before I could open the door he took my hand and pushed me behind him. I wanted to protest but he knocked and waited. I was stunned, but realized he was waiting for sounds of walkers. But no sound was heard. Daryl slowly opened the door and walked in his crossbow raised just like me and my gun. I followed him inspecting every room on ground floor. No walker and no human being was here. We reached the stairs which led to the next floor. We didn't say a word which bothered me a little. I couldn't stop thinking about his touch earlier and what could have happened if Carol hadn't disrupted us.
We went upstairs, Daryl turned right and I went left. Hearing an unknown sound I stopped. Behind the closed door right next of me must be someone or something. I turned to see if Daryl was close, but he had disappeared in another room. I put my ear on the door and heard some low scratching. I knocked at the door and waited, no one answered but the scratching grew a little louder. I didn't dare to open the door. If it was a walker and it was close to the door I would lose. If I would open the door with my right hand and if he attacked right away I might be too slow to get the gun out of my belt. I wished my left hand could at least hold a gun, a knife, something. I exhaled in frustration.
Suddenly a hand grabbed my shoulder and I almost screamed. Daryl was about to say something but I silenced him with mad eyes. I nodded to the door and he understood. I put the gun in the back of my jeans and took my knife out of my boot. Daryl turned the knob and I raised my knife to kill the walker, but there was none. A cat was sitting on the wooden floor sharping her claws. I laughed silently. "Ya afraid of cats?" Daryl teased me in a low voice and stepped in.
"Maybe dead cats." I thought about zombie cats while crossing the room and saw another door. While crossing the room I saw some clothes thrown on the bed. I took a closer look and went through the clothes. A grey shirt with a small yellow smiley instead of a breast pocket. Size S. I took it and a light blue jeans as well. I was lucky they were my size. I looked for a closet and walked to a door. I opened it unwary and a zombie instantly attacked me with its full body. He knocked me over and I fell back on the ground. The cat made a terrible scream and jumped onto the bed hissing. Daryl was immediately at my side to stab the geek in the head who went limb on me. He kicked the dead body aside and held out his hand. I hesitantly took it and he helped me to my feet. "Thanks."
"Told ya ya'r too weak." I rolled my eyes. Now he started this again …
"That's why you are here, to babysit me." I remembered him while looking into the room the zombie had come out of. It was a bathroom. My eyes went wide.
"What?" Daryl said with alarm in his voice.
"A shower." I squeaked and stepped in. I turned the shower on but the water wasn't running. My happiness turned into a sad face. Daryl stood close and my fantasy began to play a movie in my head. I wished for this shower to function and Daryl and me under it. The moment I saw us kissing in front of my inner eye Daryl stroked me slightly as he passed me to look out of the window. I was about to ask him if we should check the kitchen when I saw my reflections in the mirror. "What the …" The left side of my face was slightly blue and my nose looked crooked. Even my left eye didn't look right … What had this men done to my face? I looked at the rest of my reflection. That wasn't me staring back … I touched my face and it faintly hurt. No wonder they had been looking at me like I was going to die.
Daryl suddenly turned and pushed me out of the room with a weird look on his face. "What?" Where there strangers on the street … at our car?
"Nothing." Before he pushed me further I saw Glenn in the house of the other side half naked. Daryl was already out of the room waiting for me in the door. I understood, before following him I grabbed the shirt and jeans. I went down close behind Daryl. We entered the kitchen and went through the cupboards. I found tinned mangos and my face lit up. "I love these. This family had a good taste."
I heard a sniff from Daryl but didn't care. I was happy to find food I liked. I looked around in search for a bag or something like that. Next to Daryl was a backpack on a chair, so I went over and put the can and clothes in it. "What did you find?" I asked as he opened the fridge. A malodorous smell greeted us and I made a few steps back. He closed the fridge. "Dead food." His voice showed his dry sense of humor. I had missed that.
When he turned to face me his eyes saw something behind me. He grabbed his crossbow and I threw myself into his direction on the ground at once. A soundless pang escaped his weapon but the gnarling didn't stop. I turned my head and saw a dead walker lying at my feet but four feet were still standing. Four? I looked up to see two walkers and another one behind them. The one was male and the other female, the one behind them … I couldn't identify. Maybe it were the former residents. There was no way out and the small kitchen was not a good arena to fight in. I quickly stood up to stand next to Daryl who shot another walker just to realize there weren't any arrows left to fire. "Shit." Another walker appeared, it was a kid.
I raised my gun with a shaking hand. "Shooting would only attract others." I looked out of the small window which was caged. "Oh no." I took my knife in my hand but was suddenly grabbed by two strong arms and shoved back. Daryl pulled me into a pantry next to the fridge and closed the door. But the walkers saw us going in here, the wooden door wouldn't stop them. I began to panic. The room was dark and small, my panic grew faster. I reached for Daryl but just touched the wall. Where was he? "Daryl?" I whispered.
"What?" His low voice came from the ground.
"What are you doing?" I asked in a shaggy voice. I felt for him and touched his back.
"Looking for a door in the floor." He made low noises and I heard the gnarling of the walkers on the other side of the door. They must be banging themselves against the door trying to get in here. "In my old home we had a cellar under the pantry." I just hoped he was right.
"Fuck." But he was wrong. This word didn't mean no good. "I wish we had some light." I searched the wall for a light switch with my right hand which was slightly shacking. The banging against the door grew louder and I heard some wood splitting. The door cracked a little and a small light beam highlighted the back of Daryl's head. My heart was beating hundred times a second as more rays fell on Daryl.
"Ah!" This sounded good. I saw him opening the floor and holding out his hand. "Move!" He pulled me down and pushed me into darkness. My breathing seemed to stop. I was paralyzed of the darkness and limitedness of the small room. Daryl climbed in next to me and shut the skylight. He undeliberate pushed my back to the wall and a dim light was switched on. We were standing in a small corridor which led a few meters left. High cupboards were at the both sides of the corridor and they were full of cans and water canisters.
"A blessing in disguise." I looked up to him. His eyes catching mine. There was this moment again … Just now I realized his right arm was wrapped around me and his hand resting on my back. He slightly pulled me more into him. But my left arm was in the way, cause it was still strapped in front of my chest. With my right hand I reached for his face but his eyes seemed to tell me to stop and I hesitated. Wood burst and clacking teeth were heard. The zombies must have broken the door finally. Their moaning was loud, almost unbearable. We could hear them stomping into the small pantry. I winced and Daryl pulled me to his chest protectively. I heard his heartbeat and looked deeper in the corridor. "Maybe we should look for an exit." I tried to distract me. Now I was the one ruining the moment. Daryl let go off me and I made a step towards the cupboards. They were full of canned food and water. I turned around and reached for the backpack he held in his hand.
I just didn't know how to act or what he wanted. One moment he was protective but his eyes showed different and the next moment he was emotionless and cold. What was this mess in his actions? I thought about Carol again, Carol and Daryl. Even their names matched. Shaking my head I turned my attention back to the cupboards and started to fill the bag. Daryl followed my doing and helped to gather as much as the bag could accommodate. Our hands touched faintly and I looked at him, but he was scanning the shelves. This was unreal. I was finally alone with him and ruined the one moment when no one could ruin it. Should I go for it? Daryl turned to me. "What?"
"Hope Maggie and Glenn will find us here." I tried to distract me from him and my disastrous feelings. I looked at the full back in my hand and thought about them having fun in the other house. They were not coming yet, maybe they would start looking for us in an hour.
"We just wait until these geeks are gone." He stated looking up to the ceiling. He had a plan, which was good. It meant we were not lost. I would never be lost with him.
"The bag is full. We can't take any more stuff." I put the bag to the ground watching his lips. I made a step towards Daryl. "Thank you for watching my back." I told him. "Again!" I smiled.
"Told ya ya're not ready to go on a run." I could see his eyes on my lips too. Maybe this was the perfect moment to kiss him? "No, you said I was too weak." My smile grew wider. He just looked at me and again I wasn't sure how to act. I put the bag on the ground while I still heard the gnarling above our heads, so the walkers were still there. We had to sit this situation out, so I sat down and rested my back on the wall.
Daryl sat down opposite of me and his hard features relaxed a bit. "Haven't see this smile in a long time." His hair protected his eyes from to be seen. I didn't dare to say something, besides I didn't know how to reply. "Why have ya been sitting with me at camp?" I almost stopped breathing. He wasn't really looking at me, his eyes switched from looking at me and looking to the ground. Was that what was bothering him?
During our time at camp Merle had been a tyrant who had kept Daryl on a short leash. Both had been mean and wrathful all the time. But when Daryl had been alone he had been a silent and nice fellow. He had turned into a more social kind of person since then, more caring. I smiled at him again. "Because you and your asshole brother were the only one teaching me how to cope with the world we live in now. You didn't look at me like I had to be a housewife." That and your eyes, your looks. How cheesy to think that. You gonna hit on him or what? Pushing aside my brother's voice I looked over to Daryl. "Without your teachings I would never have survived." I winked without dropping my smile.
Suddenly he looked at me. "So you tell me now who did this to you?" He eyed my left arm.
I exhaled loudly. There was no moment … He again asked me about the one thing I didn't want to talk about. Just tell him … tell him what he deserves to know. "I followed you to Atlanta." This was vague, "you" could mean the whole group, but it meant him. "I got injured but I was saved by some people. Alex, Mike and John, they brought me to their safe heaven." I smiled to myself remembering Alex, John, Doc … but then my smile dropped. "They were living in a hotel in the woods, it was surrounded by high fences. It was really safe. Doc stitched me up." I remembered when I had woken up the first time there and Alex had been there, joking with me. "When we were on a run I looked out for you guys. Wanted to go to the CDC." I looked over to him, knowing he had been there.
"But it was gone?!" His voice was easy.
"No, we never made it. We were attacked by strangers. First time on the street … little later, there was a guy … but even Randall helped me to hide, his group found us. Men killed my friends in front of my eyes. There was this one particular guy who smiled when he killed my friends." Right now I noticed my voice had grown hard. "Phillip killed my friends. He almost killed me too but Milton put me back together, just so they could humiliate me again and again. There were two groups, the one was Phillip and Milton and the other was Joe and a few guys." I remembered it all. My heart ached remembering Alex … I felt like it had all been my fault. I had been so eager to go on runs, to go further that I hadn't thought about people being bad to the bone. I would never had thought someone would attack us with the intention to kill us.
"Randall?" He asked disrupting my thoughts.
"Yeah …" Something in the back of my head was ringing, but I pressed the snooze button. "I think it was his group who imprisoned me." I wanted to go on with my story and end it fast. He didn't need to know details about the torture. "Even Phillip tortured me, he and Milton escaped with me from the others. We were attacked by walkers and I feigned death, they left me lying under a dead walker to die or turn, I don't remember … Short after this you found me." I fell silent. The story was told, maybe not everything, but most of it. I realized it felt kind of good to have finally told him, to let him know … but on the other hand I felt embarrassed and naked.
He had listen all the time, but didn't say a word. Daryl eyeballed me and his eyes landed on my left arm. What was that in his eyes? Was it pity? There was a frown … I didn't like that his eyes lingered on my left arm that long. Don't backpedal now, you are opening yourself. It never feels good to expose yourself to someone, but he is not just anybody.
"Thankfully I am a right hander." I joked.
His lips escaped a dull laugh but his face wasn't laughing at all. "I've missed this seeing-good-things-in-bad-things-attitude." I smiled. Daryl looked from my arm to my eyes and quickly stood up, as if he was avoiding this conversation, my glance … as if he was avoiding me. I was about to say something when a squeak was heard. "Rats?" Daryl stepped over me and went deeper into the corridor. I stood up too, grabbed the bag pack from the floor and followed him. A rat ran through my legs. "Iih." Just one rat …. No problem, I just hoped there weren't more to come. I put the bag over my shoulder and took a canister of water out of the shelf next to me. We could come here again and take the rest, we could survive some more month with this secret dump. At the end of the corridor was light, there must be a door. I was close behind Daryl.
"This morning I smelled ya scent all over the pillows." Did I hear right? Daryl stopped as if he didn't want to go on, but after a few seconds he continued. "This time I wasn't imagining things … this time it was real … ya're alive." I didn't dare to comment or to move and just enjoyed the moment. I watched his back, he didn't turn around to face me. There was an unknown melancholy in his voice as if he felt guilty. The moment I wanted to say something, he interrupted my not so much thought out thoughts. "There's more light." He walked on without further explaining. Should I say something? Was it my turn now? Did he want me to act? He just said something meaningful … This must mean something. I took a deep breath. "Daryl, I …" I fell silent … I was really bad at this.
We were standing at the end of the small corridor, it looked like we were in some kind of bunker. Like the one in Kansas, where people went when a tornado was coming. I still watched Daryl's back, his crossbow was unloaded, didn't he have any more arrows with him? I put down the canister and took out my knife while Daryl opened the door. The sun blinded me, but I saw Daryl stepping out, his knife raised, so I walked out after him.
"Stay close!" We turned left to go to the car. When we walked around the house, a walker approached us and he had company. Another one was behind him and I saw some more behind our car. Daryl was acting fast, when he moved forward to stab the first one in the head and was already stabbing the next one. I was impressed, he was good. Suddenly I heard a sound behind me and turned. A walker was moving slowly in my direction. I smiled, not afraid no more. I laid down the bag pack and approached the dead geek as it approached me. The grip around my knife was tight and my pace fastened as I raised my knife.
Where is this self-assurance coming from? I ignored the sarcastic comment of my brother. Deep down the answer to his question was simple and ordinary. Daryl. His words, no matter how the meaning of his words were, they touched me. They stirred something inside my heart, my mind … as if they flicked a switch. I was running high on adrenaline.
I knifed the walker in the head. He immediately fell limb on the ground. I felt good, like when I shot the walkers with Maggie a few days ago. I heard a slurping and another walker appeared. I suppressed a laugh … I was really high … high on adrenaline. Straightening my back I stood up and slashed the throat of the walker. A gurgling sound told me he wasn't dead. Yet. I kicked the walker into it's chest and it fell back. The head rolled next to the body, while the body wasn't moving anymore, the eyes of it were fixed on me. Its mouth was moving as if it wanted to say something or just eat me. I stabbed my knife directly in its greedy eye.
I heard steps behind me and rose from the dead body, ready to kill the next zombie. Glenn was looking at me with big eyes. "You're frighten me just a bit Ella!" He said and slowly approached me, as if I would attack him too. Maggie was close behind Glenn. "Looks like you can handle this world pretty good!" I cleaned my knife on the walkers close.
Something jumped next to me. Scared I fell back, I wanted to balance myself with my left hand on the ground while I held my knife with the right hand. But I couldn't move my left arm at all so I fell on my face. "Fuck." That was more than embarrassing. I didn't look up to them but saw Maggie's feet next to me. "You hurt?"
"No!" I shook my head and went back to my bag to pick it up. Meggie followed me. "Wait. Are you bleeding?" Why should I be bleeding? I shook my head again and saw Daryl approaching us.
"You okay?" His voice was steady.
"Yeah. No problem." I smiled. This would not bring me down, this world would not bring me down.
Maggie again was next to me. "There is grass on your face and hair." She whispered with a grin. With the sleeve of my shirt I wiped over my face.
see you next week! xxx