Hey guys! Story is going on ;o) Thank you all for your support and reading-on! I hope i ll be able to publishmore often, now that i have more time ^^
Enjoy the next chapter and as always: R&R xxx

The night was short and full of no-sleep. Early the next morning we were all gathered in the corridor where the sleeping cells were. I sat at the end of the stairs next to Hershel when the talking began. We hadn't had breakfast yet, but started the day with a discussion of leaving or staying. Everyone was talking, except Merle and Daryl. Merle was excluded from our group, staying on the other side of the corridor behind the closed door. He had the good hand hanging through the bars. I stared at him thinking about how this might work when I realized he stared at me too. His eyes became small and his tongue wetted his lips. I quickly looked away. From the corner of my eye I saw Daryl walking back and forth above my head. "We should have left last night. Governor is just waiting for us on the streets." Merle said through the bars. Everybody tried to ignore him.

"We're not afraid of that prick." Daryl spat at him as if he was the governor.

"That truck through the fence thang … that was just ringing the doorbell." I was afraid Merle was right. He knew the governor, had lived with him. I would trust Merle on this, he knew Phillip's madness just as I did. Plus Phillip had the guns; we had the walls.

The group argued on and on, everyone had his own opinion. I was making plans myself too. I would just sneak out of here and go to Woodbury. I would infiltrate this fucking town and burn it down, if I had to. Maybe I would find Andrea, maybe she would help. But no … Merle had said something about her and Phillip … how could she possible sleep with or love this man?

"Get back here!" Hershel's voice echoed from the walls as he screamed after Rick. My attention was immediately back at the group. This time Rick stopped and Hershel went after him. It was quiet, no one dared to intervene. "Your slipping … We have all seen it. But now is not the time." Rick slowly turned but wasn't looking at anyone. "I put my family's life in your hands. So get your head clear and do something!" Rick's eyes were not really clear but he nodded and went out.

Daryl walked down the stairs, so I stood up, ready to walk away. What should I do? Talk to him? I was too proud and too hurt for that. Since he had returned we hadn't talked; hadn't even looked at each other. Well, I hadn't looked at him, had avoided him and Merle by going to sleep. But now we were at the same place again and here weren't much hiding places. When he stopped next to me I went upstairs and into my cell. I wasn't ready for a talk. I wasn't clear headed at all. Normally my brother was helping me, the inner voice who never shut up about anything was as quiet as the wind.

I wondered why I couldn't be just fine with Daryl being back, just like the others … I sat down on my bed, head in my hands. Suddenly I could feel sympathy for Rick again. Like Hershel had said, Rick had changed because of the loss of his wife … maybe the shadow of the same black cloud was above my head too. I felt like a mess. Phillip had humiliated me again, had tortured my friends and killed some of my group. Merle was right, the truck-incident was just another aspect of Phillip's brutality and madness.

"May I come in?" I looked to my left where Glenn stood in a full amour jacket. He must have undressed the dead walker in the yard who once had been a military. I nodded and slid to the end of my bed so he could sit down next to me. But he didn't sit down, instead he leaned on the wall right across of me. "You know what we talked about before?" I thought about the last time we had talked. It had been on the watchtower. I nodded again, remembering he had told me to stay at the prison and defend our home.

"Are you with me?" His question didn't sound like a question at all. He was clearly making a point here.

I nodded. "I'm on your side. I'll defend this place, our home." With all my heart.

"Good. We'll repair the fence and the gate. We need to gather all our weapons and ammo." I didn't see any sense in walling up. They had broken through it last time, they could do it again. Maybe attack right now and kill them all. Who were these people who followed Phillip anyways? "I'll check the fences and search for material to stabilize the gate." He slowly went out of my cell. "Ella." He turned around, as if he had forgotten to tell me something. "I'm always there for you if you want to talk." His voice was somehow emotional like an elder brother. I smiled, knowing he meant the whole Daryl-situation. "Thanks bro." He gave me a short nod and went out. Seemed Glenn was slowly growing into the position of an elder brother.

Flashback

Dead walking … city-bombing … And in the middle of this: people behaving all normal … It was somehow weird how these people with different characters could arrange themselves in such a short time. Asian, Puerto Rican, Redneck, Afro-American, we all sat around the fire in peace. Maybe there was hostility, but most of it came from racist Merle. He just couldn't shut up about drugs, women, sex … he was a dirty-porno-collection-asshole. While I watched these people I found out they were not alone. Amy had her sister Andrea, Lori had her son and seemed to be good friends with Shane. There were the Morales family and Carol's family. Jacqui seemed to get along with T-dog quiet well and that funny-grandpa Dale seemed be the kind of person who likes everyone. Except the Dixon brothers who were somewhat dark. They were rarely talking, Daryl always busy cleaning his crossbow or scanning the area. Merle did the talking … if you could count abusing and insulting as talking. I liked how Daryl seemed to be protecting the group. Maybe he was just protecting himself and his brother, but still he brought food and killed zombies.

Suddenly Glenn sat down next to me with a smile. "Hey Ella, what's up?" It was funny how I could read his face right from the start. He was all nervous and shy. Since a few days, when I had met these people, Glenn was the one I had talked to the most. We had a lot on common and I was allowed to sleep in his tent. It had been wired at first, but he was a nice guy. Sure a nice guy. He is too much into Amy to look at you that way. My brother laughed in the back of my head. Since the outbreak my inner voice had returned. Since the accident when my brother had died, it was his voice and not my conscience that babbled on and on in my head.

"Nothing." I answered. Lori came to the fireplace and handed her son some plates. Emancipation seemed forgotten and women were back at the stove again. Right now I didn't care, I was hungry. Soon there would be rabbit or squirrel on my plate, I didn't care, I knew there wasn't much left.

"How was your day? Didn't see you washing clothes at the lake." Glenn said while I observed the others. Hey there dreamer, someone is talking to you. Better make friends in a situation like that. "Shut up! " I scolded my brother.

"What?" I immediately looked to Glenn, blushing. "Oh no … sorry, not you." No, but your bigger brother who is keeping you alive. He will think you are crazy. I rolled my eyes at his comment and concentrated on Glenn's words. He had said something about a lake … "You wanna go to the lake now?" It was already getting dark, it wasn't such a good idea to sneak out now.

"What … no …" He stammered. "You seem to be a little … confused." He puts it the nice way. He waited for my reaction but there was none. "Are you okay? … I mean … sure, this world has changed and who knows if we are going to be okay at all … you know … if you need someone to talk …"

"Thanks Glenn. It is just … too much at a time." I smiled. I couldn't tell him about my wired brain.

"What about your family, your parents?" He asked and my heart hurt.

"My parents are on a Europe-trip. The only one near is my cousin in the city." I watched the fire and saw the bombs in front of my eyes again that had exploded a few days ago. They had bombed my hope for family. I am still here. I sighed. "What about you?" I asked Glenn without looking up.

"I am a Pizza Delivery Boy." He rearranged his cap; seemed he was proud of that.

"That's why you're so fast?!" I laughed out loud. That's right, get some normality in this shitty world. That's my little sister … Suddenly everybody was looking at us.

"Shut your mouth women. Ya're attracting walkers." Daryl huffed when he passed me. I was intimidated by his whole behavior, yet I smiled. He went to his tent which was farther away than the others. I had a feeling that this man would either kill me or save me.

Glenn patted my arm and laughed lowly. "He got issues …" It felt nice to have someone to watch your back in a world like this. I smiled at Glenn, thinking about how much we had in common; how we were in tune with each other.

"Thanks Glenn." I stood up to get some air. This whole new situation was not that easy and my nature clearly got in my way handling this situation. What are you talking about girl … this situation is a new start. Nothing and no one could ever bring you down, nor will this new world. I looked down on Glenn and reached out my hand. "You wanna join me?" He hesitated. "Come on Glenn, It'll be fun!" I smirked at him and he took my hand. I dragged him with me while I made my way to the lake.

"I think we'll get a lot of trouble Ella." It was funny, but I liked the way he said my name. It had a wonderful sound.

"We are no kids Glenn. Let's have some fun." We were almost at the lake. I turned to wink at him. "Trouble-bubble… don't be a jerk." It was a warm night and stars were looking down on us. Suddenly my grasp around Glenn's wrist was loose and he ran past me.

"Slowpoke!" He screamed while laughing. This was what I needed, some craziness in an apocalypse, a little me in my normal chaos. We reached the lake almost together. I had to admit he was faster than me. The water mirrored the landscape and dancing stars. I took off my shoes and wandered into the water ankle-deep. I always liked to swim. I waited for Glenn but he wasn't following.

"You think this is just for now?" Glenn asked me still standing in the sand. Suddenly he seemed thoughtful or maybe he was just afraid of water. "I mean this apocalypse thing … this will stop … it just has to stop." I was afraid to ask if he was thinking of his family right now. He was looking sadly to the ground.

"Everything happens for a reason." I started, realizing anything I would say wouldn't make it better. "But as long as we got each other watching our back, we'll be fine. The government should be working on a solution, on a cure or whatever it takes to make our lives what they had been." I smiled and he returned a sad smile. I walked back to him feeling the warm sand under my feet. "Maybe everyone in this camp has a family member here, but we got each other." Now there was the young smile again that had greeted me the first time I had seen Glenn. His happy nature was back.

"Okay lil' sis, let's get back, Lori's dinner must be ready."

"You sure don't want some night swimming?" I took his hand to pull him into the water, but he resisted.

"No Ella, at night the water looks so different; A little eerie." So he pulled me to him. "Plus I'm hungry." He grinned and bend his knee to pick up my shoes. I used the opportunity to jump on his back. We laughed together and Glenn carried me back to camp. While Glenn was running, looking ahead, I watched the trees around us and saw a man lying dead between the bushes. A half rotten human being. Glenn was moving pretty fast but I swear I had seen an arrow in his eye. Had he been already here when we had went this way a few minutes ago?

When we arrived at camp again, Shane went straight at us. "Are you two naïve kids or what? You left when it was getting dark. No one leaves when it is dark." He screamed.

"I'm no kid." I shot back at him. "And it wasn't dark when we left." I wanted to pass him, but he stepped aside so I couldn't get through.

"Then don't behave like a five-year-old. You haven't even been doing your duty today." He crossed his arms. Some of the others were slowly joining us. I wanted to say something, but he spoke first. "Everybody has a job to do here. So play along."

I sniffed at his words, but didn't want to argue. I went on to the cooking place. When I past Dale, he shook his head with a fatherly smile. I stuck out my tongue with a big smile. "If he knew where I had been today …" And laughed out loud, just like Dale.

When I arrived at the cooking pot, where Lori scolded me with a why-don't-you-just-do-your-duty-glance, I smiled at her too. Nothing's going to stop my nature, not Shane and not Lori's motherly glance. But you should adapt yourself. As if Daryl and his brother were adapting at all. They have each other … don't be a fool. Lori passed me a plate with meat. "You're next to wash the dishes." She told me. "Come on, a bit housework brings normality." Not in my world, I answered her silently. Seemed not only the world has gone to shit, but emancipation as well.

I shrugged my shoulders, knowing she was right. A little dish-washing wouldn't kill me. I sighed and turned to search for a place to sit and eat. I looked to the tables; all places were taken. So I looked over to Glenn who was talking to Dale. I didn't want to hear something about me doing my duty, some women's work … so my eyes searched further. I saw Daryl sitting alone on a log at his tent. Screwing up my courage, I walked over to him. He had killed walkers around camp, the arrow in the dead man's head from before was evident. He did a lot and got nothing in return. I was curious about him, would he and his brother kill us and steal everything or learn to adjust to the group? Plus, he knew how to shoot and kill. Shane wasn't willing to train me to kill the walkers, maybe Daryl would.

When I walked straight at him he didn't look up from his crossbow, but growled. "Keep going!" But I didn't walk on. Someone was moving in the tent and I blushed. Did he have a woman in there? But Merle's head stuck out of it.

"I want to thank you …" I started but he glanced at me as to tell me shut-the-fuck-up-and-leave. I hesitated to go on when I heard Merle snorting. I laughed at the sight of him, how his head hung funny out of the tent. "Thanks for supporting the group and for killing the walkers."

He stopped cleaning his crossbow. "Ya're wasting yar breath here." He was so indifferent. I stared down on him wordlessly. "Move yar ass to do yar work."

I thought about sitting down, about to challenge him a bit. I smiled at him and his eyes became small. "Ya should wash clothes instead of swimming and flirting." His voice was low and almost unhearable. I looked back to Glenn who was now talking to Amy. There would be definitely something going on. Again I zooned out, but shook my head to concentrate on Daryl.

"So you're observing me?" I sat down and regretted it immediately. Daryl threw me I'll-kill-you-look that startled me. He laid down his crossbow and was about to stand up when Merle snorted loudly. To distract him from his anger I laid down my plate. "You're a pretty good shooter. The arrow was right through the eye. Maybe you can teach me …"

"I'll teach ya a lesson if you don't get lost!" He pressed through his teeth. Oh my sis, you're in serious trouble. Move your ass! I watched Daryl and waited for him to act. When he stood up, I stood up faster and walked backwards. "So I see you tomorrow." I smiled and made my way back to the others fast. I didn't want to know what he could do. But when I looked back over my shoulder, Daryl had sat down again shaking his head with a small smile.

I helped Carol washing the dishes. Women-work. In the past I would never had done it under Shane's eyes. I had always hated washing the dishes. Remembering the campsite made me realize how much I had changed. My happy nature, my whole entity had turned into a dark calmness. All the thoughts about dancing, singing, sunshine were gone and replaced by full-of-hate-revenge. The calmer and darker I had turned the less I had heard of my brother and suddenly he was gone, just like everything of my former life, even my personality. Who was this person I was now?

I sighed. I didn't like the person I had changed into, I missed my seeing-something-good-in-a-bad-thing-attitude. It was that … everything had turned bad, there was nothing good in this world. Could I just change back? Maybe the answer laid there where I started to live up again, in death. I felt as if the death of Phillip could release me and I could see light again.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a silent grown. I looked around the corner to see Michonne training and watched her muscular and thin body moving on the ground. So far it seemed that she would stay with us. She was strong and willing to fight for us. The door opened and Merle stepped out of the sunlight into the dark prison. My muscles immediately tensed. He sat down on a chair next to Michonne and watched her ignoring me and Carol. "Smart to stay fit." While he let out sarcastic comments about fitness, Michonne ignored him completely. Suddenly his dialog turned into another direction and he really tried to apologize in a Dixon way.

When I had finished cleaning dishes and made a step into the room, Merles eyes were on me. "Oh bad ass, ya playing hide and seek?" There was an unknown smile playing around his lips.

"Shut up." He tried to fit in for Daryl, but he had done too much damage, destroyed too much. Michonne would never forgive him just as Glenn and Maggie.

"I'm trying to play along." He laughed. But in my mind I saw Glenn beaten up and Maggie scared to death. There was a lot of damage and I didn't know how he would clear it all up. Maybe he was waiting for a reaction or an argument, but he didn't get anything from me. In the past I had tried to befriend with him. Without drugs and alcohol he had been something like a nice guy. But with more people around he had always been a real asshole.

The ignoring seemed to make him angry. "You know what, when the governor will come next time, he'll kill me first. Than our friend Michonne here." With the knife on his stump he pointed to Michonne who still ignored him while doing some sit-ups. "But you know what, even the governor will kill me first I won't see my brother die." Now his attention was back on me. "You know what he's gonna do to him?" He made a dramatic pause. "Maybe rape ya in front of ma baby brother's eyes. Maybe kill ya slowly and let him watch." His eyes didn't mirror his words, he seemed some kind of sorry. I was disgusted at the thought and at him mentioning stuff like that.

"And maybe you'll just rot in hell." He laughed at my words, came closer to ruffle my hair, and went out. I was surprised of the fatherly gesture. Michonne starred at me surprised too, than she shook her head, deep in thoughts.

I walked over to my bedroom and lied down. Did Merle really change? Could they all change? I stared at the ceiling of my little cell, distressed. My brother had disappeared, Daryl was back but I couldn't let him get back to me, Merle was somehow nice, and all the others had changed. One person, one damn single person, had destroyed my group, my family.