Hello, here I am, back again. With a kid at home it is not quite easy to write as often as I want. I am sorry I let you down for tooo many weeks and hope you are still following this story. I have to admit that I felt I had kind of lost my flow ... But when I wrote this chapter my ideas started to bubble over. Enjoy the new chapter and have anice day :)

The days had gone by in a blink of an eye. While I had at least some hope to find Merle – because that man was a survivor – the others were kind of devastated. While our former group was still fighting the emotions of Beth's death, the new guys were adjusting. The Tara girl tried hard to be nice – maybe she was –, Abraham and Rosita stuck together acting all protecting and this weirdo Eugene …

Poor guy, it doesn't look he has a friend …

"Damn liar." I gave back. "He belongs to the other group."

Other group? Aren't you one group? You are talking of a family all the time, now you talk about two groups.

"He had been lying for crying out loud." I shouted back silently. This world and living in it was based on trust. This trust had been destroyed. He had given us hope … and hope was destroyed. Was hope just as illusional as a safe place?!

Isn't hope something to believe in? Don't you hope to find Merle, hope to find a safe place and don't you hope there will be a happy ever after? Come on sis …

I did hope for an ending to this zombimania. But there were two sides of the coin. On one hand hope made us believe in something we didn't know for sure – but wanted to believe in – and on the other hand hope could be so easily destroyed.

Isn't it when the world tells you to give up that hope tells you to try it one more time?! My brother recalled my father. He had always been a comforting person who always had a quote ready. But looking around now, we were in the middle of no-idea. It had rained for two days straight and there didn't seem to be an end to the shower. We had stopped on our way back to wherever. We had been on the road for a week – at least that was what I thought … I couldn't think clearly. I was hungry and wet to the bone. I stood with Carl, Maggie and Michonne close to a tree, holding Judith tight in my arms. A huge knocked-over billboard over our heads gave us shelter while we were waiting for the others. Could it get any worse? But when I looked down on Judith who slept peacefully in my arms I took a deep breath. This little girl wasn't trouble at all, never really screaming or attracting walkers. Only looking at her soothed me and gave me strength. We just needed to find Merle and everything would be fine.

Noah was still limping, striving through the rain in a close distance, checking for unwelcome snarling guests. He couldn't stand still and I knew why: He was walking the wrong direction. We had to find Merle fast. The priest Gabriel joined him and talked to him in a silent voice. The rain was so loud I wouldn't have understood a single word if I'd wanted to. The priest wasn't my favorite newbie either. Had he decided to stay with us or had it been Rick's decision?

Interesting, so you don't like new people. My brother mocked me. You are behaving not the way you are talking … two groups – one group … one family … I felt a sigh. This is one big family

Both of them didn't know Merle, still they followed us. I felt miserable the others went with us. They should have been on their way to Noah's home. Instead they were accompanying Daryl me on our Merle mission of whom they were so very fond of. Noah didn't even know Merle, he was with us because of Beth and the fact that we saved him from the hospital. I looked at him again, he didn't look happy.

It was his choice, their choice. No one was forced.

There hadn't been a vote.

Better than to split in a world without a phone or any other resource to locate each other.

The others didn't look quite happy either. Michonne talked lowly to Carl while Maggie's eyes seemed to be somewhere else. I wondered why she didn't go with Glenn. I hoped the others would return soon. Daryl was gone with Sasha to 'catch a bite'. Abraham and Rosita were looking for a place to stay, as were the others. Only Eugene was standing next to us totally wet. He wasn't standing with us under the shelter-giving-street sign but right next to it holding himself like a baby.

But this wasn't the worst, there hadn't been a sign of Merle so far.

I started coughing. "You okay?" Michonne turned to me. I wish I could say I had been swallowing but I sneezed twice. Michonne immediately took Judith out of my arms. So my babysitting time was over. I missed warm Judith in my arms, plus she always clamed my mood.

I thought that's my job.

I felt really cold standing alone now. "I'm fucking freezing." I told her.

"We need a fire." Carl started to rub my wet arms. "She's all wet, just like the rest of us."

Maggie turned to us. "We'll all catch a cold if we don't find a place soon." She was still silent, too silent. The death of her sister had made her numb in a strange way. Talking to her wasn't easy, she only answered short with empty eyes avoiding conversations as good as possible. I still wondered why she hadn't been looking for her sister in the first place.

Maybe she is asking herself the same question.

"I can't ask her that." I silently told my brother. The interaction felt normal again, good again.

Silence fell upon us once more. "I can't believe we're standing in the rain because of Merle." Maggie sighed not looking at anyone.

Carl hugged me. "She didn't …"

"It's okay." I breathed. "No one of you know him the way I do. He saved my life." Maybe more than twice. "I've seen him crying over the loss of his brother. Merle … he isn't the asshole you all want to see in him anymore. He swore to Daryl to keep me safe and now he is alone, not knowing if I am still alive and thinking his brother is dead." Didn't they understand at all?! "I need him to know that his brother is alive. Daryl needs his brother."

"I get it." Carl said next to me. "He saved your life and now it's your turn."

Not quite what I was thinking but nice words.

I nodded to Carl. "He is as human as we are. He deserves his place right in our middle." Maggie only sniffed without looking at me. At least Michonne nodded. "In this world we only have each other left." I went on. "We'll never know who we are going to see again and who we won't. For my part this group has become my family and I would never give up on any of you." Finally Maggie looked up to me. "This world has gone to shit … we have said it a thousand times, but at least I am with my sisters …" I looked from her to Michonne. "… and the ones I care for the most." I looked down on Carl who was still holding my arms and I hugged him back. "We have all lost someone we love, but this is not going to happen anymore. I will not allow any of my family to get hurt." Was there a small smile on Maggie's pained face? "You are my family."

A nice speech. A bit emotional though. But I think they understand now.

"At least this time you're not running away again." For the first time in days Maggie turned to me and looked at me. Really looked at me, not through me.

"Maggie …" I walked over to her, now happy Judith was in Michonne's arms. I took both of her arms and pressed my forehead on hers. We didn't need to say another word, she hugged me tight with a deep sigh.

Suddenly Eugene cried out loud. We all raised our weapons. But it was only Rick who stepped out of the woods. I could swear Eugene had peed his pants but we they were so soaking wet I couldn't tell if he had. This man was really not my favorite newbie. He was easily scared, couldn't defend himself, wasn't even willing to hold a weapon. He was strange.

And the fact that he was a big fat liar has nothing to do with this … Give him a chance, look at that poor guy.

But I wasn't willing to give him a chance. I sneezed again. "Bless you." Carol came from the other side.

You are behaving like a kid. Don't you wanna use your sleeve to wipe away mucus? And liking this interaction with my brother again was gone.

"We have found a place." Rick came closer. Water was dripping from his dark grey beard. The only good thing of the rain was that we would be clean after this downpour.

There you go! I was already missing that attitude.

I shivered when a cold drop of rain made its way from my neck down my spine. Carl rubbed my arms faster while I wasn't starting to feel warmer at all. "Where?" He asked beside me.

"Not too far." He answered and told him how they had found the shelter we were longing for. I didn't listen, I looked around in the hope that Daryl would return soon too. The place couldn't be too far – as couldn't be Daryl – we had made rules on how far to go away from our spot.

…

When everyone was back, we walked after Rick in the direction of a dry shelter for the night. "You kept the books." I told Carl when we walked next to each other. He was carrying the backpack full of books I had given him at the church. I wished we could start a library again … someday maybe …

"I wouldn't just throw them away." He smiled. "I can't wait to teach my sister how to read."

Everything had changed. There was no school anymore and if this zombimania would go on and people would reproduce, kids would definitely not be raised like back then. Not reading books but learn how to kill a walker with a knife. The last time I had thought of regular school stuff had been at camp when Lori had forced Carl to learn and solve arithmetical problems. He and Sophia had been made to believe there would be a normal world again and they would have to go to school again. Maybe it had been a good idea to distract the kids like that.

Yeah … well I don't want to be a downer, but Sophia is dead. She might be have been a bright kid in school but she wasn't ready for this world.

Ouch.

The truth sometimes hurt. Look at Merle, he isn't quite an Einstein but look where he is now.

That was another "Ouch", but my brother was right. All the people who adhered to the normal world had died. But the ones who had adjusted to the living hell called present survived. I looked over to Carol who had adjusted the most.

My attention wandered back to Carl. "There is a lot to learn now." And I wasn't talking about school.

"Life hasn't always been easy-peasy." He gave back.

I wondered about his words. "You think compared to this life school was hard?"

"Never mind. It doesn't matter." His eyes were on the ground. "It doesn't matter." He whispered.

What was going on in this kid's head? "Did you see the comic?" I tried to cheer him up. We had been through a lot and for a few moments I wanted rainbow bubbles and sunny cheering. "In our last hideout I had found a comic collection under a kid's bed." I gave out a short laugh. "I had to force Merle to read some. He told me he had never read any." I dramatically raised my arms and made a face." Can you believe this, he had never read a comic before." I came closer to his ear. "But don't tell him when you see him."

Carl laughed out loud. That's all I wanted. I smiled and in the next moment an attack of sneezing went through me. Carl shot me a worried glance but I waved at him still smiling. "How are you feeling?" He asked me with curious eyes.

I hated the question but calmed down for the poor kid didn't deserve my bashing. "Don't worry kiddo. I'll be just fine as soon as we have a roof over our head or dry ground under our feet." He wanted to say something but didn't and I was glad. Like before I didn't like my friends to worry about me.

After a short silence Carl started talking again. "I like the books you gave me and the one for babies. Thanks that you thought of my sister." Finally there was a smile on his lips again.

"We'll find more." I punched him on the shoulder like a good friend would do and he laughed about the gesture.

"What's the deal about you and comics?"

"Some people don't know how to read." Abraham passed us elbowing me with a smirk. Some people kept their good mood. "Or will never grow up."

Haha!

"It was my brother's passion and he passed it on to me." I looked ahead where Daryl was talking to Rick. "And who doesn't like a powerful woman fighting all the bad guys." I laughed remembering my younger self and how I had adored Wonder Woman and Black Widow. I had always wanted to be as tough as them.

And you are a bad ass to the bone. I felt my brother laughing. You became a real Wonder Woman.

"I want to pass something like that to my sister too." Carl stated. He scratched his head and looked as if he was thinking hard.

"She'll be just fine with a brother like you." I half hugged him. "I can't wait to see you both grow up and playing in front of …" My words died in my mouth. The way I saw the future was clearly a kid's imagination. I saw us living all together in a street, everyone in his own house, kid's playing on the street … ha … I was such a daydreaming baby … I was adhering to the old world too and would die soon.

No you won't. And you know why? Because you have endured this shitty world already long enough to know what it takes to survive. This is not about being lucky or having nine lives. You did it all by yourself, you fought your way through the apocalypse and you are still standing. I'm telling you, you will still stand till you grow grey and old.

I was hoping he was right, because I could see me living in this street with Daryl, right across from Maggie and Glenn who had a bunch of kids. And there was a little girl playing on our front porch too. I loved holding Judith in my arms, how my mood always cheered up. Would a baby in this world be a good idea?

You can have that no matter what. Why should this world change your way?

"Do you really want a crying kid in this world?" I whispered.

"What?" Carl looked up to me. "What did you just say?"

Had I been talking out loud? I shook my head. "Nothing."

I sneezed again and was in bad need of a tissue but the rain washed over my face so you couldn't tell if there was mucus or just water. I used my sleeve feeling even more wet. I shivered at the thought of wetness. My body longed for a warm fire, dry clothes, a hot tea would be nice too and I definitely wouldn't say no to a hot chocolate.

Are you in a feverish delirium again?

Daryl stopped and fell back to walk with us. "You look pale." The statement felt like my grandmother's scolding.

"It's not like there had been much sun in the last days." I gave back with a smile.

"Not shy to talk back." Abraham said in front of us not looking at me. Even my brother chuckled in the back of my head.

Daryl just eyed me with this glance that told me he was worried and I gave him a smile to tell him I was fine. This non talking conversation was going on quite a while now. We seemed to know what the other was thinking and just a glance or a nod was enough to know what the other wanted to say. I sneezed three times and that was enough for Daryl to come close and feel my forehead. He didn't say a word – maybe knowing me already too well – but gave me a bottle of water to drink. "Drink more water to wash it out." Clearly he was talking of an illness that nestled somewhere in my body.

I drank the water and wished for something stronger. A nice drink to warm me from the inside would be nice. "Thanks."

That reminds me of father's collection … He laughed. I wish we could go back to the day when we drank his best whiskey enjoying the sunset.

What a nice thought, I smiled and somehow I felt better. There was a time at the prison when I had been drinking with Daryl. Would there be a time there we would have alcohol again and get drunk? A drink ... Merle … "We should check liquor stores, bars …" I closed up on Daryl. "Merle, he would go for a drink, right?" Daryl starred at me without saying a word. "Right?" I asked again.

"Yeah." He looked at me baffled.

"We have to find a map." I forgot about the rain, there was a light. "We'll find your damn brother and be a family again."

"Yeah …" He doesn't look so confident. Daryl and Rick starred at me.

I took Daryl's hand. "Yeah!" I agreed. We just had to find Merle. It still felt as if it had been my fault that the brothers were separated. Merle had done what Daryl had ordered him too but I … it was me again running away …

I think this time it didn't count as running away.

Daryl's PoV

No house or anything alike in the near distance. I felt quite like back at home. No, not home but the place I had lived before. This damn rain washed away all the prints on the ground. I couldn't read a damn thing. I kneeled down and tried to find at least a hint, but it was useless. Sasha went passed me. "Let's get back." I sighed. "The food is gone" I threw after her and got up. The rain had to stop at some point. Looking up the dark clouds didn't look like they had finished their job yet. How long had it been raining now? Sasha went on and I followed her. She still wasn't at her best. A shadow was over her, the death of Bob was lingering in her thoughts. It was now that I realized she was wearing Bob's military jacket.

"I am freezing in this damn rain. I thought moving south means sunshine." She walked on. Her voice was harsh, mirroring her loss. Just like me when I had thought Ella was dead. I had been just functioning for Beth, moving on for her to be save.

I wanted to tell her that I am sorry for her loss, but I wasn't the kind of guy who could express feelings. I couldn't remember ever saying sorry to anyone. So we walked on in silence. Through the rain I heard someone coughing and a sneeze followed. No zombie would do that. Through the rain and trees I saw our group still standing under billboard. Carl stood close to Ella, holding her arms. "It's okay." Ella said and I slowly walked in her direction. "No one of you know him the way I do. He saved my life. I've seen him crying over the loss of his brother. Merle … he isn't the asshole you all want to see in him anymore. He swore to Daryl to keep me safe and now he is alone, not knowing if I am still alive and thinking his brother is dead I need him to know that his brother is alive. Daryl needs his brother." I stopped walking. What the hell was going on? "He is as human as we are. He deserves his place right in our middle." They hadn't seen me yet.

Sasha had stopped moving too. I looked at Ella who talked about a man I didn't know my brother had become. He had cried for me … She wanted to find him because of me. Not because of herself … Why had I thought different? I was stupid. A high pitched cry made me rise my crossbow. Sasha was at my side quickly, but it had only been Eugene. We exchanged a knowing glance and slowly approached our friends.

Ella smiled at me when I came to stand next to her. "Any luck?"

I shook my head. She gave me a warm smile. All the times when she looked at me or our silent conversations made me feel good. Even after such damn incidents she still was smiling at me. "Damn rain is washing everything away." The damn rain was getting on my nerves. The cold shower would make us catch a cold and we had enough of fucking illness' for now.

"I wouldn't mind some sun." She turned her attention back to Rick.

When everyone was back we started walking towards our new shelter. Carl seemed to have grown even more fond of Ella. Since we had been reunited he spend more time with her. The both of them seemed to be what had become of this group. Not related but a family. I walked a bit faster to let them talk and walked next to Sasha who was still more silent almost competing with me. My ears caught what Ella was saying from time to time. I smiled about her words about comics and suddenly her talking drifted to a happy future. "… I can't wait to see you both playing in front of …" She stopped talking. I looked back over my shoulder to see what was happening but she somehow seemed to be deep in thoughts. Her face somehow changed as if she had a conversation with herself. I had seen that look before. Wasn't she believing in a happy ending? Maybe the daydreamer had been awoken … that hurt. She was the deserving-a-happy-ending kind of girl. After Eugene's confession, Ella had been stormy quiet. Our hopes had been diminished by his lie, her hopes had been destroyed. I somehow had never really believed him. Hope had never been my strength. But seeing her giving up on seeing a happy future hurt. A happy future … a future with her. What would that be like? I had never allowed myself to think about it, never been that type of guy. But living a life with her was something I was craving for. Even with zombies around, a life with her was all I wanted.

Coughing made me look back again. Ella looked pale. I fell back into her step. "You look pale."

Again she answered with a smile on her lips. "It's not like there had been much sun in the last days."

She didn't want to be pampered, playing hero again. She wouldn't admit she was cold even when she'd tremble. When she sneezed three times in a row I felt her forehead. She wasn't really warm, not like before in the prison. My muscles relaxed. I hadn't even realized that my arms had been tensed. This woman turned my world upside down. "Drink more water to wash it out." In my imagination I would have done a lot more, but I held myself back and she nodded in thanks. Again thoughts took hold of me that weren't useful. The picture of her and me making out was in my head again, how the heat between us would warm her. I shook my head and walked on to Rick to distract myself from the demon inside of me. Now was not the time …

Suddenly Ella took my hand. "Merle, he would go for a drink, right?" I was baffled by her statement. What was that about? "Right?" She asked again boring right through me.

"Yeah." I was a bit unsure what she was talking about. Even Rick gave me a puzzled look.

"We'll find your damn brother and be a family again." Ella beamed with happiness. A family … I had never had something that would even come close to call family. What would that be like?

Ella's PoV

We had stood at the little hunting cottage for two days and had dried our clothes. The rain had finally stopped. Everybody had a bit of space in the small room, but it felt more like sardines in a can. It had been Daryl's and my time to rest. We used the time to rest our eyes, regain some strength after the cold and wet days. We sat down in a corner close to each other. Daryl put his arm around me and I rested my head on his shoulder. Eventually I fell asleep.

The smell of wood and freedom was back. I took a deep breath and felt totally fine. Had I been out long? Opening my eyes, Daryl was still sitting next to me, one arm around me. I closed my eyes again taking a deep breath of him. He pressed my body more into him. It would have been freedom if I hadn't heard a voice and I wasn't talking about my brother. I heard Tyrese saying something about Merle. I slightly turned to hear him better. "And where is Jess? Didn't she say there was the three of them?!"

Didn't you forget to tell everyone about Jess and his lie?

Did he play guilty conscience now? Since when had he been interested where Jess was? I straightened my back and looked over to the others. In the other corner stood a bed where Judith was sleeping next to Carl. Michonne was lying next to them with closed eyes. Sasha was sitting with her back on the wall almost next to us, her eyes closed. Rick and the others stood around a table looking down on it, maybe examining a map. Carol stood at one window, a gun ready in her hand. Again Tyrese stood close to her. Since we had been reunited at Terminus the both of them were quite a team. I looked further around the room to notice Rosita and Tara weren't in the room. Maybe it was their turn to be on watch.

"How are you feeling?" Daryl asked next me.

"Finally warm and dry." I turned my head to look at him. "Better." So much better …

Get a room. There was slight disgust noticeable, but how to get a room when I couldn't separate from that voice in my head?

"Ya do look better." He sat up too feeling my forehead, but said nothing. I was tempted to tell him I was fine, but didn't. Instead I enjoyed the touch of his hand. There was a movement and I looked back to the others. We had rested enough, it was time to get going. Daryl stood up first and I followed him.

"We have been moving quite a while … I think it is only fair to Noah if we now move north." Glenn stated.

I wanted to say again that Merle would go south, but Daryl bet me to it. "I know. But you all agreed to come with us. Ya didn't have to."

"There hadn't been any sign of the men." Tyrese looked at me. "Not of any of the two." His eyes pierced trough mine and a question bore right into my heart. "Not Merle, nor Jess."

"There just has to be something …" I tried.

Noah looked up to me, but averted his gaze quickly. I stepped closer to the table and looked down on the map. If we would split there might be a better chance to find him. "Yeah I know, not an option." I wordlessly told the voice in my head. Walky-talkies would be great, but they only covered a short distance …

This is not the problem …

The door was slammed open and Rosita came in. She was out of breath. "There is a herd to the east. It's huge." Tara was right behind her panting, her face read.

"How far away?" Rick asked.

"That is not the only problem." Tara stated. "There are more to the south."

Rick started to wake up Michonne and the kids. Sasha was already up and alarmed checking her gun. "We have to gather our things and move." Rosita told us and everyone was grabbing their stuff. It wasn't much we had anymore. Rick had handed out guns, so everyone had a gun. Everyone had a bag or backpack but most important: Every one of us had at least one gun and another weapon. Tyrese had a hammer, Rick a small axe and so on. Only priest Gabriel had just his bible.

You know there had been times you read this book too. You shouldn't blame him for your problems with the church.

Grunting I took the bag I had given to Carl. He shouldn't carry the books. Looking around, we had already raided the cottage. There hadn't been much left, only two cans of food. Again it was canned peaches. But no one was picky in times like these. When o looked back to the bed I saw the blanket. We could use it to wrap up Judith and use it as a baby carrier.

Looks like your brain starts to work again.

I took the blanket and walked to Michonne who was caring Judith. "Wait! It is disadvantageous to carry her like that. You need both hands outside." I showed her the linen blanket. "See, if we wrap it around the body like this, we can use it as a baby carrier." I started to wrap the blanket around Michonne the way I had seen it on mothers at the hospital. In the end Judith was sitting in the baby carrier sleeping again.

"Thanks Ella!" Michonne smiled. "A pretty good idea!"

"Wait for my next brilliant idea!" I laughed.

We turned for the door. Rick went outside first, looking right and left then nodded towards Rosita. "Where?"

We all made our way out of the cottage and Rosita pointed to the right. "We may have a chance against a few but there is a real horde coming straight at us." I was just glad it wasn't raining anymore. We started to move left. Rick waited at the door until everyone was out. He barricaded the door with the help of Carl.

Maybe you will come back, maybe others will find shelter here when the herd will pass this place.

We moved fast to the left. Abraham and Glenn were leading the group. "Where are we going?" I asked Daryl next to me.

"Out of reach of death." He grunted with a smile. But I wasn't joking. We needed to go south.

First you need to stay alive.

I had seen Abraham folding the map. I wanted to ask him for the map to check where to go but was interrupted by moist growling. Suddenly there were more than ten walkers to our right. They were almost encircling us. If we would run left again we would definitely arrive at the cottage again. Rosita stopped moving, took her huge knife out and stabbed the first walker in the head. She was much to my licking, better killing a zombie now than to be sorry later. I took my knife out too to kill a walker. It was as if every one of our group had at least one opponent. Daryl shot an arrow into a zombie's eye, just to take the arrow out and kill the next walker with it. When he had finished the second walker he looked around until he found me. I nodded and he returned the gesture. To my left Carol took a zombie down with the butt of her gun. When she met its face, it fell to the ground where she smashed its head. Her movements were so easy. She knew exactly what she was doing, there was no hesitation or fear. In the end there were more than twenty dead zombies to our feet while we were still standing. To my right stood Tyrese, his hammer in one hand. When looking closer I saw him playing nervously with the hammer and there was no walker to his feet. Didn't he kill one?

When we moved forward again, we didn't run. This time it was a normal pace. "Are we still going south?"

You are really worrying about that?! Maybe it is more important where you'll sleep tonight. I know it means a lot to you to find Merle, but look at these people!

We needed a glimpse of hope.

I don't think your glimpse of hope will be the same spark to their fire.

I sighed. We had looked for Merle for days. Still there wasn't even a single sign. The situation was a bit straining, but there had to be …

What did you expect? A path made of crumbs of bread like Hansel and Gretel would have done? This is Georgia, a big state, you didn't even ran into your neighbors, school friends or …. Okay that one friend you did walked into, but I'd rather not mention his name.

"We have no trail and no clue." Rick told us. "It's time we set out for Richmond."

I saw it in the eyes of everyone around me. They wanted to go to Richmond, were hoping for a new start. Suddenly I realized they were looking at me and Daryl, as if they needed our approval to finally set out. "Then you go, I …"

"We do not even know if he is still alive." Glenn interrupted my sentence.

"No." I yelled at him. "I cannot give up on him. He chopped off his hand and survived. With only one hand he survived the governor and whatnot. He is alive."

"Ella …" He sighed.

The well-known snarling aroused behind me. Maybe I had been yelling a bit too loud. When I turned around grabbing my knife, I couldn't believe my eyes. I started running before anyone else could move. I killed the first two walkers easily until I threw myself into another zombie. I knocked him over and held tight to his body. "Merle!" I screamed happily. He was covered in walker's blood. Around his torso dangled a chain that was tied to a walker without arms and jaw. This had been Michonne's trick to survive. I laughed even ever. "Merle!" Happy tears joined my laughter.

"Didn't think you would …" His voice was tired and absent.

Daryl was by our side quick squeezing Merle's arm. "Merle."

"Darlinya." Merle pushed me away and grabbed Daryl with his one good arm tight. "That motherfucking bastard …" Merle hissed but you could finally hear a happy tune in his voice. I swore there was a tear in his eye joining his blank expression seeing us all together. Merle straightened his back and got up. He looked me up and down. "What the hell happened?!" He took my chin and examined my lips and neck as if he was reading my body and scars like a book. His eyes didn't give away what he was thinking.

"I was … captured." I slowly started to speak. The others were still standing in their place, so far no one had been coming closer to welcome Merle. But then Carl joined my side, without any warning he took Merle's hand. "Good to see you again!"

There was a hand on his shoulder too. Michonne gave him a grin. "Bad weeds do grow tall." Even the others came to join the reunion.

"Saw the marks on the ground." Merle shook off Michonne's hand and looked my way again.

In my head I screamed at him. "Why didn't you follow me? Why didn't you rescue me!?" But my lips didn't move to speak up. I didn't even realize I had held my breath.

Merle took a look around. "Gang is back together?!" He grunted.

Before anyone could say another word, Rick played the leader card again. "Now that we finally are together …" My ears didn't hear his words. I was fixed on Merle. We stood right in front of each other glaring into each other's eyes. There were so many questions …

"Good to have ya back." Daryl squeezed Merle's shoulder. "Thanks!" He breathed in his Daryl like manner.

Thanks for reading and hopefully enjoying the story :)