An hour after we returned to the house I had locked myself in my room. I showered, brushed my teeth about 100 times, and even tried washing my mouth with soap, but I couldn't get that taste of cigarettes out of my mouth. My ex used to smoke. The taste of it was making me sick to my stomach. I was desperate to taste anything else. On my way back from the beach I had grabbed two bottles of wine to sneak into my room in case I found myself in a situation like this.
The first one was nearly empty.
I cradled it between my arms as I sat in the window seat of the bedroom. The window was open and I could hear the waves crashing against the shore. Every time I closed my eyes I felt like I was back under water and couldn't breathe. So I kept drinking the wine. It was the only reprieve from the taste in my mouth and the thoughts in my head.
"Lori?" I heard someone knock on my door. Haruhi entered slowly. "I was coming to let you know that dinner is ready."
"Huh." I replied, feeling the alcohol hit my head.
"Do you want to eat anything?" She asked, looking me over.
"No, thanks. I've got everything I need right here." I waved the now empty bottle at her.
"Ok…" She said skeptically before closing the door and leaving me alone.
Tamaki's point of view
Every time I close my eyes the events of this afternoon play over again in my mind. I can see that disgusting man with his mouth on Lori's as if he were trying to devour her. I can see him shove her. She falls. She keeps falling. I'm trying to reach her. But she's gone.
I know she's ok. I know she's just down the hallway. I know she was just trying to help those girls. But I almost lost her. I couldn't live with myself if I lost her.
"It's awfully gloomy out there, huh?" Hunny says from across the room as the images replay once more in my mind.
"It's not just gloomy outside. It's pretty gloomy in the dining room here as well." Karou says, clearly referring to me hunched in the corner of the room.
"Come on, quit moping, Tono." Hikaru tells me.
"You shouldn't have picked a fight with her in the first place." Karou adds. I'm only half listening as Haruhi enters the dining room wearing a frilly dress.
"Wow! Haru-chan!" Hunny says.
"Where'd you get that dress?" The twins ask her.
"From my Dad. He must have repacked my bags when I wasn't looking." She explained.
"Way to go Dad!" The twins cheered.
"Hey, where's Lori-chan?" Hunny asked her.
"Um, Senpai." I heard Haruhi speak from over my shoulder. I forced myself to stand up and look at her properly.
"What is it?" I asked.
"I–I don't want to get involved, but I think Lori might be drunk." she told me.
"What?"
"She um… she had an empty bottle of wine and was acting odd when I went to get her." She explained.
"Hey! Tono! Where are you going!?" I heard the twins yell after me, but I didn't realize I was even running until I was out of the dining room. I sprinted down the hallway until I made it to Lori's room. I froze outside the door, momentarily unsure what to do. The image of her falling flashed through my mind once more and I threw the door open.
"T–Tamaki?" She was sitting by the open window, tears staining her cheeks and red wine darkening her lips.
"What are you doing?" I asked, shutting the door behind me as I made my way across the room to her.
Lori's point of view
I wasn't sure if he was really standing there. How much had I had to drink? Was I hallucinating?
"What are you doing?" He asked me, moving closer to me.
"What do you care?" I replied.
"Why are you getting drunk in the dark by yourself!?" he was yelling now.
"To get this fucking taste out of my mouth!" I screamed back at him. He was standing over me now, looking surprised.
"Wh–What do you mean?" He asked as I stood to face him, grabbing his shirt to hold myself steady.
"All I can taste is that man's cigarette! That horrible taste! It won't go away! Please, make it go away." Fresh tears spilled over my eyes.
"Lori…" He sounded sympathetic now. "Alcohol isn't the answer… What can I do to help?"
My eyes locked with his. An idea hit me so hard it almost knocked me over — or maybe that was the wine going straight to my head. But he offered to help and I couldn't stop myself now.
I closed my eyes, embarrassed, and tugged forcefully on his shirt, pulling him down to me until his soft lips hit mine. I felt him gasp in surprise and took the opportunity to slip my tongue into his mouth. He tasted incredible. Sweet and a little salty from the ocean air. Fireworks exploded in my mind and the events of today started to disappear until Tamaki placed his hands on my shoulders and gently pushed me away.
"Wh–What are you doing?" He asked, his eyes wide.
"Please…" I begged breathlessly, wanting to feel his lips on mine once more. "It's… It's the only way to help. Please help me."
He stared deep into my eyes as if searching for more of an explanation. I'm sure all he could see were my pleading thoughts. He moved his hands to cup my face, his long fingers extending into my hair. My breathing hitched as he slowly leaned down and gently touched his lips to mine once more. I pressed my entire body against him as I parted my lips. This time his tongue met mine in my mouth. The feeling of him overwhelmed all of my senses. I slid my hands around his torso to place them on his firm back. He was so warm. As his tongue pressed against mine, I couldn't stop myself from moaning against his lips.
I felt him tense up in response to the noise. He pulled away for a moment, looking down at me. I realized how much I was taking advantage of him and slowly separated myself from him. As I stepped back and away from him, the wine really kicked in and caused me to stumble toward the open window.
"Lori!" Tamaki called out in surprise as he grabbed me around my waist and pulled me close to him once more. He held me tight, trapping my hands against his chest while his strong arms remained around my middle. Before anything else could be said, his lips were on mine once more. It was my turn to gasp, shocked by the feeling of his lips moving desperately against mine. I managed to slip my hands off his chest and tangle them in his soft hair. His hands slipped under the bottom of my shirt eliciting another moan from me. The feeling of his skin on mine made my head swim and my clothes suddenly felt bothersome.
"T–Tamaki," I moaned against his lips. He pulled away slightly, his eyes piercing into mine. "I… I'm sorry for today."
"I thought I had lost you." He whispered, resting his forehead against mine and keeping his arms tightly around me with his fingers on my lower back.
"I was so scared." I admitted. "And when that man ki–kissed me. He reeked of cigarettes. Just like… just like my ex." Tamaki moved one hand to my cheek, gently wiping away more tears that fell.
"So that's why…" he swallowed hard, "So that's why you kissed me?" I lowered my eyes, embarrassed.
"A–and because… Because I wanted to." I confessed. I felt his hand move under my chin, tilting my head to force our eyes to meet once more.
"I want to, too." He said simply before kissing me once more. His lips pressed softly against mine at first, but after a moment our kiss grew more desperate. His hand moved to tangle in my hair as mine moved down his chest to the hem of his shirt. I hesitated for a second before slipping my hands under his shirt to feel his taut stomach. His skin was warm under my touch but I could feel goosebumps forming.
Suddenly, there was a loud crash from a storm outside. I jumped in surprise, accidentally knocking Tamaki and myself to the ground. I landed awkwardly on top of him. Despite the rain that was now pouring through the open window, I made no move to get off of my friend. From the way I was laying on top of him, I could feel every inch of his hard body. Even the shockingly hard part of him pressing into my legs.
"Lori." My name never sounded better. Tamaki gently pushed my long hair out of my face, staring into my eyes as if he were going to kiss me once more.
"I–I'm sorry." I stuttered, rolling off of him and sitting with my back to him. "I–I shouldn't have… we shouldn't… I can't…" I couldn't get the words out. I heard him get up and move to close the window.
"Lori, what's going on? What… What was all that if we shouldn't?" He asked, kneeling in front of me. I buried my face in my hands, embarrassed.
"That was amazing." I admitted quietly. "But you don't want someone like me. I'm–I'm damaged. I'm–I'm not… I need you to know the truth about what happened after you left France."