What I Wish I Could've Said
Rated: T
Disclaimer: I own nothing... Obviously. Just playing in someone else's sandbox for a bit.
Summary: Hindsight is always 20/20. Everyone has a single moment that they wish they could have said something better than what they actually did. A completely random series of what-if vignettes.
Ch 28: That Time Booth Said Brennan Missed Him
For some reason, some reason he didn't really want to admit to anyone, least of all himself, Booth was feeling in a very aggressive mood.
God, what's she doing to me? he thought to himself as he listened to Brennan share details of the case that she had used as an excuse to lure him to the Jeffersonian on the pretext of a legitimate cause. I haven't seen her for a few weeks, and suddenly, I'm back with her for ten minutes, and I'm already going nuts. I missed her, damn it—I missed her...and she had to miss me, too, right? I mean, that's why she called me out of the blue with this case, right? There was no reason for her to call me about it except to use it as an excuse to see me, but why won't she admit it? It's not like it's a big deal. God, she's so damn…infuriating!
Suddenly, his ire getting the better of him, Booth couldn't help himself as he answered her question about what to do about the strange case of the three mysterious bone fragments that she'd found at some golf course she'd been called to by the NTSB with a bit of snippiness in his voice. "I don't know. Try the PGA," he finally suggested to her with a smirk as he punctuated his words with a sharp tap of his knuckles on the edge of the examination table.
Brennan, not one to be intimidated, merely stared at him in response.
Suddenly, Booth gave her a knowing smile as he tilted his head at her and said, "Uh huh. You know you've done a couple of cases without me… and you miss me."
Instantly, Brennan had a ready retort for him. "Zack misses you," she corrected him. "Not me." Because even if I did miss you, and I'm not saying I did, but even if I did miss you, there's no way in hell that I would ever admit that little factoid to you, you arrogant, smirking, infuriating, alpha-male! Brennan thought.
"Zack and I don't even talk," Booth responded. Come on, Bones. What's the big deal? Just say it. You missed me.
With a small shrug, Brennan said, "He seems to think it's a male bonding ritual."
Leaning in a bit closer to her over the edge of the Bone Room examination's table, Booth quickly countered, "Maybe he's right."
Not one to be outdone by Booth, Brennan shook her head, only stopping to quickly glance up at his eyes for a few seconds as she said, "No, he's not."
His already aggressive mood incensed by her stubborn refusal, Booth pursed his lips as he felt his ire raised tenfold. Quickly, he retorted with an arch of his eyebrow, "Could be."
"You told him that so you wouldn't have to talk to him," Brennan quickly pointed out. Ha! Top that one, Booth.
"Well," Booth responded with his own jaw growing tight at their verbal tennis match of pointed banter, "it was nicer then shooting him." Game, match point, Bones.
Her eyes blazing in angry fury, Brennan pursed her lips together into a thin line. Keeping both her hands on the edge of the examination table, lest she does something that they both might come to regret, Brennan's jaw tightened as she muttered a simple response to concede his point in clear frustration. Bastard, Brennan tried to communicate to her partner with the irritation that was clearly ablaze in her eyes. Fine. You win that one. But, don't expect to win the next one, Booth.
Taking a breath to try to calm herself, Brennan hoped her nostrils weren't flaring in anger, although she knew they probably were. Attempting to regain a calm center, Brennan took a few precious seconds to gather herself as she looked away from him and down at the table in front of her. Then, in a very measured voice, she said, "Goodman has ordered me to investigate the other extra body."
However, as soon as he saw her clenching her hands just out of sight below the edge of the examination table, Booth knew that Brennan was trying to calm down. And, for some reason, he wasn't quite ready to let their belligerent energy of their bickering go quiet yet. Nope, Booth thought to himself as he contemplated how best to bait Brennan again. I'm not ready to let this be over yet by a long shot—at least, not until you admit that you missed me and that's why I'm here right now.
"Well, then, you better get on that," he smirked again at her, knowing that by flashing his arrogant grin at her that it was almost the same as waving a red flag at a hostile bull. But, just to be certain that her attempt to remain calm and measured would fail, Booth added, "Next time you know, you miss me pick up the phone call me we'll do lunch or something."
As soon as the words were out of his mouth, another surge of strong emotion flashed in Brennan's eyes as her paltry attempts to remain unruffled by Booth's words vanished in a flash of futility. "I do not miss you!" she snapped, playing into her partner's hands and the trap he'd so expertly laid, her loud tone and tense body language conveying how strongly she felt about a topic that she vehemently continued to protest just a bit too much if it were actually the truth.
Me thinks you doth protest a bit too much there, Bones, Booth thought. A feeling of pleasurable warmth at the thought began to spread throughout his body as he grinned at her. Yeah, you missed me—you totally missed me.
"Yeah," Booth said as he nodded his head at her and verbalized some of the thoughts that had just echoed in his head. "You miss me. C'mon."
Shaking her head, Brennan continued to protest, and in so doing, just made Booth even more insistent. "I do not miss you!" she repeated, her tone loud, rough, and a bit too raw for the truth of her protest to be correct.
Baited by her stubborn refusal, Booth leaned in towards her again, as he pointed at her with his hand, "Say it."
"No," Brennan countered.
"Yes," Booth said, this time he being the one becoming even further incensed by her obstinacy.
"No," Brennan said as she shook her head. "It's not true, and I'm not saying it." Placing both hands on her hips, she said, "And, there's nothing you can do about it."
"Say it," Booth commanded her again, leaning in closer towards her, this time so that there faces were only a separated by a few irksome inches of air.
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
And, instead of responding with another monosyllabic answer, Booth wasn't really certain what was happening as some part of him seemed to give his body the command to lean forward and press his lips to Brennan.
They met with a hard force, the pressure exerted by him probably more than he'd have used if he was actually thinking about what he was actually doing. The inner dialogue of the conflicting voices in Booth's head was actually quite interesting in their subsequent response to the fact that he had planted his lips on his partners in the Bone Room of her lab at the Jeffersonian.
What in the hell just happened?
Holy shit, I'm kissing Bones.
Oh, God—she's going to break my arm.
But, at the exact second that some rational part of Booth's brain started to take control again—probably the last of the three voices who was afraid that at the very best he'd come away from this harebrained idea with a black eye—and, at the very worst, he'd come way with at least one significant broken bone—well, then something interesting happened. Booth had expected Brennan to reach out and grab the lapels of his suit jacket. But, instead of her using them to push him off of her, she actually reached out, dug her fists into the material of his jacket, and yanked him closer to her. The pair stumbled backward, past the edge of the examination table, so that Booth backed her up against the wall of drawers with his warm body firmly pressed against hers.
In that moment, Brennan inhaled his scent deeply. The pungent aroma of his sweat mixed with faint odors of his shaving cream (mint), some type of product he used to style his style his hair into place (icy menthol), and the spray starch of his suit collar (lemon) all mixed together to tickle her nose. Brennan opened her mouth wider as she hastily thrust her tongue in between his soft lips, afraid she'd be unable to answer the question as to what Booth really tasted like beyond a hazy recollection of tequila, fear, and regret. This time, desperate as she to enjoy the taste of him for as long as she could steal away the moment, the more she tasted of him, the more she wanted—no, the more she needed to have. Oxygen became a secondary concern to the pair as Brennan continued to plunge her tongue in and out of her partner's mouth, letting it dance sweetly across the slick surface of his inner cheek and down across the smooth hardness of his teeth, before reversing course to caress the slippery roughness of his tongue's surface.
For Booth's part, he had no intention of ending the kiss any time soon as soon as he realized how eager Brennan seemed to be to continue it. Indeed, he reveled as he felt the two of them falling into each other as everything else fell away in that moment. However, necessity finally jerked him out of their delicious reverie when he felt Brennan's hands sneak underneath his suit jacket, go to the waistband of his pants, and begin to tug at the tails of his shirt that he'd tucked in. Hissing a bit a her touch, at almost the same moment he nudged her knees apart with his thigh, Booth knew that what he was doing might be considered sending her mixed messages. Thus, reluctantly, he forced himself to pull away slightly from her, even though it nearly killed him to do it, hoping that the few inches he'd finally managed to put between them would be enough distance for rationality to return to them.
"What…was…that?" he finally managed to ask, looking at her as he struggled for breath, even though he almost became undone as he saw her bright blue eyes darkened with lust and desire as she looked back at him. Oh, God, he thought to himself, knowing how much trouble he was rapidly in in that moment. I want her…and she wants me. Want you, Bones—
"Me showing you that maybe I did miss you," she finally managed to mutter through stunted gasps of breath.
Unable to help himself at her final concession of the point he'd been trying to drive home when they'd started the crazy exchange, Booth pressed back in after her, and Brennan welcomed him with eager arms as she soon found herself slammed back up against the wall of storage drawers.
"Knew it," he murmured as he buried his head into the crook of her neck and began alternatively to lick and suck the soft pressure point of her throbbing pulse that was beating erratically in that moment. "I knew it," he repeated in between kisses. "Knew you missed me."
"I did," she said as her hands came back up underneath his suit jacket as she racked her nails across his back. "And, you missed me, too. Admit it."
"Every day," he moaned as he felt her knees nudging his own once more. "Every damn day."
It what was sure to be an embarrassing moment if anyone walked in, for a split second rationality burned brightly as Brennan realized where they were.
"Booth—" she moaned into him.
"Mmmmppphhh—" came the mumbled response as his own hands had drifted to the buttons of her blue lab coat, somehow managed to pluck the buttons free, and moved underneath the hem of her blouse.
"Oh, God, Booth—" she moaned at his touch. "Wait—"
"What?" he finally managed to mumble, although he didn't still his hands as they eagerly sought out her warm skin.
"Not here," she moaned. "Someone could come in."
"Don't care," he groaned into her ear. And, somewhat uncharacteristically, in that moment, he really didn't.
"Not here," she moaned again. "Ummm…not here." God, Booth…please back off just a little bit, just for a moment, or I really am going to let you do me right in the Bone Room…
"Where?" he finally managed to mumble into her ear, his voice a velvety whisper as he moved his mouth upwards and began to nibble on her earlobe. "And, it better be someplace close then."
"Office…" she groaned in a single breath. "My office has a couch, and the door locks, and there are no security cameras there."
"Perfect," Booth said as he finally pulled away from her. "But, now, Bones—right now."
Pausing only barely long enough to make certain her clothing was in fairly respectable shape, Brennan merely gave him a brief nod before she all but bolted from the Bone Room. Allowing her a thirty-second head start, Booth took three deep breaths as he tried to calm down long enough to bluff his way past anyone he might encounter between the Bone Room and his partner's office. As soon as he hit thirty, he was out the door.
Fortunately, for the pair, neither the forensic anthropologist nor the FBI agent encountered anyone as they made their way towards Brennan's office, which was also, mercifully empty when they encountered it. Brennan barely had enough time to pull her blinds and spin on her heels before Booth was there in her doorway, a very predatory look in his eyes as he paused only long enough to shut and bolt the door behind him. Not to be outdone, Brennan refused to back down in this, as in everything with Booth, as she matched him step for step.
But, ultimately it was Booth who pulled her towards him in a rough yank as he grabbed her arm and pressed his firm body tightly against hers. After that, things became hazy for the pair as random pieces of both of their clothing began to hastily scatter about her office.
And, just before he pulled her naked body down on top of his, Booth gave her a lopsided grin as he whispered in a rough voice, "Say it again."
Raising her head to meet his darkened gaze with a happy and hungry look of her own just before she moved to resume kissing him, Brennan smiled as she said, "I missed you."
-TBC-