(14) "What Is She To Me Except A Menace?"

Alec pulled Odessa into the throne room harshly by the only arm she had left and pushed her forward when the doors opened. She stumbled and glared at him with as much hate as she could muster for manhandling her. She opened her mouth to tell him off but shut it and winced when his deadly and blazing eyes met hers. She shrunk in on herself and turned away from him in an instant. The vampires in the room watched the two with vigor, wondering what had happened during their trip to cause an inseparable couple such as themselves to disregard each other with malice and contempt. Not to mention the glaringly obvious detached limb in Alec's hand.

"I trust your little vacation went well? Although it seems there may have been an incident," Aro said pointedly with a raised eyebrow. He held out his hand and Alec was eager to take it and share his memories. Aro stiffened and took a deep breath to steel his nerves, something he had not had to do in a while. Caius zeroed in on the action and smirked. He glanced at Odessa and sneered at her presence, eyes laughing with mirth at her missing limb.

"What has she done now, brother?" Caius asked. "I'm guessing she got into a fight and lost."

"It appears our dear Odessa has acted out of turn," Aro said lightly yet dangerously at the same time. "Tell me, did you think to stop and ponder over your words and actions before following through with them?"

Sensing the trouble she was in, Odessa kept her mouth closed and stood as still as she could. She figured if she didn't move and if she didn't say anything, she could act like she wasn't there at all. It wasn't one of her favorite approaches to danger, but it was an option. Aro growled loudly and stormed up to Odessa. She tried to back away from him, but she was pushed towards Aro by Felix and Demetri. She looked at the pair in shock and scrunched her eyebrows in hurt at Felix's actions. She didn't have time to think about Felix's betrayal as Aro's hands found their way around her neck and began squeezing. She tried removing his hands but with only one arm, it was too difficult of a task. She looked over Aro's shoulder and pleaded with Alec to do something to help her. His form was tense and ready to spring into action, but he held himself back with immense control and turned away from her helpless gaze. He wouldn't betray Aro. Besides, she deserved some sort of consequence for causing so much trouble. It was only right.

"You are part of the Volturi now, and as such, your actions reflect on us. We are not undignified cavemen waltzing around and spreading our authority. We do not cause conflict wherever we go, and we do not cause unjust and unnecessary death," Aro gritted out. He lifted her slightly off the ground and ignored her pawing hand. "There are times when we need to remove a powerful being from a coven, but we only do so when that coven is trying to outsmart us and outpower us. The Volturi may have overthrown the Romanians, but we did not make it so we were the rulers of the vampire world." Odessa started seeing black spots dance in her vision and wondered if she was going to experience the phenomenon of passing out. "The vampire world chose us! They could have revolted and removed us from power if they very so wished, but they haven't simply because they trust us to judge others and serve punishment to those deserving. No matter how fragile the relationship between the Volturi and the rest of the vampire world is, they still trust us enough to govern and lead their lives. We do not take insubordination lightly!"

He tossed her to the side haphazardly. She flew past dodging members of the guard and hit the hard wall, cracking the surface and her skin and sliding down until she was laying against the marble floor. Her eyes, half-lidded from the lack of oxygen, watched as Aro walked up to Caius and spoke something to him before sending him in Odessa's direction. Caius approached her with a dangerous and alarmingly innocent smile. The last thing she saw was him reaching for her before she blacked out.

Odessa woke up on a cold and damp concrete floor. She groaned as her body ached and pushed herself into a sitting position. She tried rubbing her eyes with her right hand but paused when nothing moved. She blinked mindlessly at the stub connected to her shoulder, her mind blank as it tried to process what that stub meant and remember what had happened for her arm to be completely gone. She reached for it with her left arm and recoiled back before she could touch it. She was mortified at the thought of not having her right arm. She looked around wildly but could not find the missing appendage. She stopped moving as the past events replayed in her head.

She remembered Serena ambushing her and ripping off her arm, she remembered Alec killing Serena and Huilen banishing her from ever seeing them again, she remembered how angry Alec had been and how he had silently fumed the entire way back to Volterra, she remembered being choked by Aro and thrown against the wall, she remembered Caius coming toward her before she blacked out. She remembered Alec not helping, not even looking at her. She looked around her and realized she was in a cell. Reinforced bars kept her in her place and concrete walls lined every side of her. She hung her head and stared down at the cold concrete. A spider crawled towards her and stopped before her left hand. It hesitated before it crawled onto the back of her hand and up her long-sleeved shirt. She watched it crawl with emotionless eyes, watching its next move and wondering what it wanted with her. When it reached her neck, she peeled it off with her left hand and watched it struggle in her grasp. Its body caved in on itself in an attempt to latch onto something, but she refused to allow it to find peace. Finally, the spider gave up its scrunching and its legs began to dance in the air, as if a puppeteer were controlling its every movement.

Eventually she let it go, but not before she grabbed ahold of its essence and pulled four legs from its body. Once it was on the ground, it tried to run away. Sadly, it found that it couldn't. With all the legs removed from one side of its body, its weight was unevenly distributed, and it couldn't balance enough to scramble away. Odessa watched it struggle on the ground and felt bad for removing its legs. Eventually, they would grow back, but the spider would remain in a constant state of panic until they did. She sighed and used the wall as support to stand up. She took a step closer to the spider, lifted her foot, and held it over the small arachnid. Slowly, her foot inched down until it flattened the spider and ended its life. She pulled her foot away and watched a leg twitch slightly before it was still.

She gazed at the small stain of guts and limbs until she heard a door creak open, and someone entered the area. She stiffened and walked backwards until her back hit the wall. She slid down it and hung her head so that she wouldn't have to look at the person. Their footsteps stopped in front of her cell, and all was quiet again.

"You refuse to look at me," he said in a quiet tone. Odessa refused to acknowledge his presence and instead focused on the particles floating in the air around her. If she were a human, she'd have had an allergy attack by now due to how much was in the air she breathed in. "Do you hate me?"

Her lips pressed together in a fine line to prevent her from speaking. While she didn't necessarily hate him - she didn't think she could ever hate him - she felt immense displeasure with how he acted. It technically wasn't her fault that Alec killed Serena. Maybe she had instigated the situation to the point where Serena attacked her, but Alec had no need to kill Serena. He was the one who went overboard and killed her in front of everyone. If he wanted to get revenge for what Serena had done to her, then he could have just torn off her arm and been done with it. If she thought about it, it was Alec who had ruined her chances at having a good relationship with Nahuel, Huilen, Jennifer, and Maysun. It had been going well until Serena attacked and Alec overreacted. If Alec had just been lenient, they would have been more receptive to another visit. Now, Odessa was banned from going near them.

"Still being childish, I see," he commented, trying to instigate a response from her. He only wanted to hear her voice - wanted to know he had royally messed up. He felt like he hadn't and that his actions were very much acceptable for the situation that was presented; however, he also knew how Odessa was with family and her lack thereof. He also knew of her temper.

Odessa bristled at his comment and glared at him mercilessly. She opened her mouth to say something but remembered that she wasn't supposed to be talking to him, so she closed her mouth and moved her eyes away from his form. She wanted to yell at him for how he allowed her to take the brunt of the punishment without arguing for her case. She wanted to tell him how unfair it was that he was standing on the other side of the bars instead of being in one like she was. A small part of her wanted to tell him how happy she was that he hadn't been hurt.

Alec huffed through his nose in amusement at her actions and continued to instigate. He knew that doing so would eventually get her to talk to him. He didn't feel bad about it, either. The things he threw at her were partially true and quite harmless. If they weren't in such a tense situation, his words would have started a playful argument.

Odessa was steaming in her spot on the floor. If she were a kettle, she'd be whistling loudly and shrilly. In her mind she dared Alec to open the cell doors and touch, to get burned from the scalding intensity of her anger. He made one final comment that sent her water boiling over and she couldn't help but spring up - with a little difficulty - and stomp towards him. She pointed a finger in his face and began yelling.

"You are the one acting childish!" she screamed. "Taunting me, berating me, making me feel like I am some sort of human who cannot change its own diaper! I am grown!"

"You haven't been acting like you are," Alec commented seriously.

"And you have?" Odessa snarled. "You are the one who killed Serena without batting an eye because she ripped off my arm!"

"Did you not want me to help you? To defend you?" he asked incredulously.

"Like you defended me in the throne room against Aro's words? Like you helped me when they dragged me down here?!"

"I thought it best you faced some sort of punishment. You can't act without thinking about the consequences of your actions. You have to think of those around you," Alec reprimanded stiffly. "While I had no clue they would give you such a strict punishment, I am glad they reprimanded you."

"I don't have to do anything! I am my own person! No one owns me, no one can tell me what to do!"

"I would never want you to feel that way, Odessa," Alec admitted. "But that attitude is what got you here in the first place. You must learn how to interact with others without letting your personal feelings cloud everything. How can you want to be a part of something but not want to at the same time?"

"You have no idea what you are talking about."

"Don't I? You can't question everything without listening to the opinions of others! You completely dismiss those who oppose your views because you haven't had anyone to tell you otherwise. If you want to be a part of the Volturi - a part of a family, a part of something bigger than yourself - then you need to get your head out of your ass and act like it!"

Odessa scoffed and turned on her heels. She stalked towards the back wall and stared at it as if it would melt under her gaze. She wasn't in the mood to talk to Alec about what had happened. She had heard his thoughts on the matter and wanted to hear no more. She was more worried about her arm and where it had gone. She knew there was a possibility that her arm could be reattached to her body, but she didn't know the time limit, nor did she know if there would be any difficulties due to her hybrid nature. Regardless, she wanted to find out sooner rather than later.

"You continue to turn your back to those giving you advice. How can you mature if you are not willing to seek and accept criticism?" Alec continued.

"I'm finished talking to you," she said monotonously. She turned towards Alec and tried crossing her arms. It was rather awkward, and she immediately relocated it to her hip. "I want to know where my arm is."

"It is in a safe location," he answered plainly.

"I want it back," she demanded.

"I am afraid that is not possible."

"And why is that?"

"Because of your actions, the Masters thought it a good idea to leave you without your arm until you've shaped up."

"That's not their decision to make!" she yelled. "My arm is my arm!"

"Maybe you should consider being more open to criticism rather than being defensive and dismissive."

"Maybe you should leave me be!" she bellowed. She bared her teeth at him and her eyes, covered by a thin layer of unshed tears. "I don't need this right now!"

"And when will you?" Alec posed.

Odessa ignored him and slid down the wall again. She hung her head and stretched her legs out in front of her. Her left arm laid limply to the side, and she barely managed to keep herself upright due to her slouching nature. Alec thought she looked pathetic sitting there, much unlike the woman he had been entranced by when he first saw her. He saw a warrior, someone who was fierce, guarded, and protective of their values and their self-worth. Now all he saw was a fake, someone who wasn't truly who they presented themselves as, someone who disguised their weakness and immaturity with fallacious vigor and solidity. Truly, he felt like he was cheated. He scoffed loudly and walked away from her.

"If I knew you were capable of such pathetic mewling I would have never offered you to stay."

She spent a month in that cell rotting away. She wondered if she looked like that woman she had helped escape: starved, deranged, scared. If she didn't look it, she sure felt it. She hadn't eaten since they left her house, and her body was constantly fighting her to rage against the cell bars and demand food. She didn't know how much longer she would last. She knew of vampires who had gone insane from hunger, but she'd heard the stories and knew it was something you couldn't come back from. So, she kept herself occupied. She stayed within her mind to keep herself from facing her reality. She thought about her past, the pain she had felt being around Joham and John, the emotional and physical abuse all around her. She thought of her grandmother's smiles and the way she used to place her hand on Odessa's lower back to steer her away from Joham and John whenever they came around to keep her safe. She thought of her life after the plantation - how free she had felt yet how scared she had felt. She had never been on her own before and had never seen what the outside world had to share.

She was excited and nervous to see the sights of the world and to explore as much as she could. Unfortunately, racism and discrimination weren't only found in the United States. She was ostracized and treated like an outsider everywhere she went. She was surrounded by people who looked nothing like her and viewed her as nothing but a circus monkey ready to do new tricks. If she refused their order, they tried hitting her, spitting on her, and pushing her. If she did as they asked, they insulted her and told her to stay in her place. It would have been too easy to shatter their bones and cast them aside like the animals they were. But she didn't want to expose herself or her true nature.

She ventured away from Europe and Asia and visited the countries within Africa: Nigeria, Ethiopia, The Congo, Somalia, Ghana, and South Africa. She visited Kenya, the home her grandmother talked so much about. She felt welcomed, to an extent, and basked in the diverse cultures and languages. But they were experiencing their own problems, and Odessa didn't feel safe. Her perception of the outside world was quickly shattered to pieces, and she didn't know what to do about it. What small hope she had about finding a place in the world to feel safe, secure, and a sense of belonging dwindled down until it was nothing more than a wisp of smoke floating off into the distance.

She traveled away from Kenya and found herself back in the United States. She had arrived in Virginia in late November of the year 1859. She'd heard about the steadily growing division between the North and the South from her travels in Europe. The European countries were mocking the United States for biting off more than they could chew - they still thought the United States was stupid to branch away from England and this was just karma for fighting so hard against something that could have been beneficial. She was curious to see if anything had changed since she had left. While it had only been a handful of years, she felt that small wisp of smoke float towards her again.

The air was tense, even more so than when she had been in the South previously. They looked at her warily and with disgust - nothing she wasn't used to. But she was surprised to see the unmasked and unadulterated hate shining on the faces of her fellow black brethren and women and the almost unanimous change in essence color. They weren't smiling artificially in the faces of others but rather mimicking the hostile faces of those oppressing them. She hadn't expected that. It wasn't until a few days later that she understood why.

John Brown, an abolitionist who held a raid in Kansas a few years ago, led a smattering of other men to overrun an arsenal a few towns over. They had been surrounded by a company of U.S. marines by morning and were eventually captured a few days later. His raid had caused a lot of fire to the racial war evident in the country and many black people were inspired by his courage and strength. He had been found guilty at the beginning of November and was to be hanged for treason and murder on December 2nd. A week later, Odessa found herself watching the execution. She saw the brave front he put on and how fearless he was as he stood there with a noose around his neck. She saw how he had decided to be a part of something bigger than himself and die for that same cause. She saw in his eyes how he regretted nothing and how content he was with seeing so many black people revved up to cause change.

With his last dying breath, the small wisp of smoke was rekindled into a small candle flame. She had been inspired by his courage evident even in his dying moments. She began helping those in need and participating in harboring fugitives on the run. It was easy for her to hide them during the day and guide them during the night. There were times when they were caught, but Odessa took care of it in a heartbeat. It wasn't until 1863 when she left the United States to isolate herself once again.

On a particularly warm and humid night, Odessa had been caught sneaking people out of her temporary home by a familiar man. She should have known that he was nearby, but she had been too preoccupied with helping them escape to recognize the scent permeating the air. Joham had smirked and spouted nonsense about how he had been trying to find her after all those years. She had stood there with large eyes, resembling a deer in headlights as she was frozen and could do nothing but listen to his speech. She snapped out of her fright when he mentioned killing the humans. She caught control of his body before he could reach them and frantically yelled at them to run away. She would have gone with them, but she wasn't granted enough distance to keep control of him and escape with them. When they were far enough away, she made Joham turn around and run in the opposite direction. She ran backwards, keeping her eye on him while trying to gain distance between him and her. When she could no longer see him and felt her control over him snap, she ran faster than her heart was pounding and escaped.

It was only a matter of time that she had to leave, regardless. As much as she felt like she was part of something, she wasn't. She had never been enslaved or felt like she couldn't eventually leave and find a safe place to live. She was powerful enough to hide wherever and hurt whomever she pleased. She didn't feel the fear they felt on a daily basis, and so there was a natural divide between her and the others.

She found herself in Iceland and took the opportunity to buy land in the middle of nowhere as soon as she could. The country was lovely, save for the people, so she decided to make it her permanent home. She lived in fear he would find her and only went into town when she needed more supplies or needed a bite to eat. She tried taking up writing to occupy her mind but found she was too impatient to draft lengthy novels about her feelings. She tried knitting but mastered the skill too quickly and became bored of it within days. She tried picking up an instrument but found she didn't like the sting of her lips after hours of blowing, nor the cramping of her hand, nor the dryness of her mouth, nor the stinging sensation in her fingertips. She became caught up in her mind and knew she was starting to develop an insanity. It wasn't until Vera came along that she thought she would succumb to the thoughts in her mind.

Vera was an average looking vampire with short blonde hair styled in a bob and a skinny frame. She was loud and spunky and treated life as if it were living in her rather than the other way around. She was fearless and refused to allow anyone the upper hand. Her eyes always sparkled with mischief and her mouth seemed to be permanently frozen in a red, crooked, smirk.

Odessa met the blonde when she was hunting one night in the town closest to her home. She had been sucking the life out of an elderly man when Vera had jumped down from a roof and introduced herself, said she had been traveling for some time and hadn't come across anyone of their kind in weeks. Odessa was stiff in her presence and guarded like a brick wall. She made her leave and ran into the night without a glance back. A few hours later, a knock sounded at her door, and she immediately narrowed her eyes at the blonde's presence.

"I followed your scent here," the blonde had said. "It's part of my gift. I can keep track of a person for up to a week if I ingrain their scent into my mind."

Odessa knew she had no other option than to let the blonde inside her home and wait for her to leave. The blonde introduced herself and Odessa reluctantly reciprocated after a minute of pestering. Odessa found she didn't trust the smile and giddy nature the woman exuded, but she couldn't help the loosening of that tension and mistrust. She hadn't had someone to really talk to in years and found she didn't want to pass up the opportunity of friendship. Vera was sympathetic and understanding whenever Odessa gathered enough courage to tell her about her life. Vera, in return, shared how she grew up in Russia in the mid 1500s under Ivan IV's terrorizing reign. Vera was able to relate to Odessa as they both had lived in countries where unrest and civil animosity was common. Vera lived with Odessa for two decades before she reminded Odessa why she didn't trust people.

The sound of the dungeon door opening jolted Odessa out of her memories and caused her to furiously blink to refocus her eyes. She lifted her head and stared glossily at the visitor. Blonde hair tied neatly into a bun at the nape of a neck and blood-red eyes staring disappointedly at her made her wonder if Vera had grown her hair and infiltrated the Volturi.

"Come," Jane said. "The Masters have found a use for you."