Night turned into day. The sun peeked through the cloudy sky, and still I remained by Bella's side, not about to let her go. She was breathing on her own now, which I was so grateful for. Nevertheless, my concern for her grew.
With each passing second, I worried about her. Worried that her stable condition would take a turn for the worst without warning. I needed help. No. Correction, she needed help. But I knew I couldn't take her to the hospital. So, I could only hope that my venom was starting the change, making its way to her heart. With her being so quiet and not moving, I was really worrying about her.
It had been hours since I bitten her above her heart and on the other side of her neck, by now my venom was coursing through her body, I hoped. Despite all that, she never made a sound. Normally one would cry and scream out in agony, as well as thrash around. Instead of being silent as she was. This was definitely not normal. I was sure I had done something wrong.
On its own accord my right hand went to my pocket and fished out my phone. I remained where I was with my knees in the snow next to my wife who was laying on the log. Quickly, I brought my phone up and looked at the screen through blurry eyes.
The picture on my lock screen was of her and I on Spring Break when we went to England. How happy we looked, and at the time, we were. We were a lot happier than in our current state. I looked from my phone to my Bella, she was still unconscious, and I feared she wouldn't make it. There was so much uncertainty that if I were human I would have been breaking out in a cold sweat from anxiety.
While venom tears that would never fall filled my eyes once more. My thumb punched the buttons on my phone, taking me to my contacts, right to the one person I needed to talk to the most. The one that I was sure could offer me guidance in my time of need. The one person in my family that existed the longest and always seemed to have words of wisdom to offer my siblings and I for every situation.
I pressed the contact of the person whom I needed to speak to. Breathing heavily, I closed my eyes and did something I don't normally do, which is pray.
While the line began to ring, I pressed the phone to my ear. I prayed slightly to the God that created the beautiful creature that's my Bella. Fearing that she was on the brink of death and knowing I screwed up I prayed to him, she, it, them, or they - by no means am I a religious man and had no idea what pronouns to use. I prayed with all my might that we wouldn't be separated. That Bella would pull through and I would change my ways, no longer would I be immature and let my temper get the best of me. I would be the mature Edward that my wife needed and try to think things through.
My prayer and the line rang again.
There was no denying that my stupidity is what led to Bella clinging to life. I wiped the venom tears from my eyes to see her properly. She appeared to be sleeping peacefully, yet I knew otherwise. She wasn't sleeping, she was in a state of camo of sorts, all because of me.
Feeling horrible, I gently kissed her lips as the line rang for a third time. Only ten seconds had passed from when I first made the call, and my mind was now hell. It was definitely not somewhere I cared to be.
Parting my lips from hers and looking at her beautiful face that now had a snow-white tint to her complexion. I went over possibilities to end my existence if she should not make it. Setting myself on fire was definitely at the top of my list, followed by a dozen more horrific possibilities. Though, I didn't have time to thoroughly think most of them through because the line stopped ringing then.
"Hello, Edward," Carlisle said.
His voice was patient and kind as it always was. Though I couldn't read his thoughts, I did detect a hint of worry in his tone. Without his thoughts to offer me insight, I could only guess what might have worried him.
"Hi." I spoke, my throat tight and my voice sounding strange. "Alice called you?"
"She did." He answered calmly. "I was ending my call with her at the same time you called. Which is why I didn't pick up right away. How is Bella?"
I could tell how much he wanted me to answer his simple question. I could also tell how much he wanted me to answer in a coherent manner so he could understand me. However, I felt very insecure, much like a little boy who was faced with a horrible situation and needed comfort from his daddy. I began to sob, he comforted me before he asked again
"She's unconscious." My voice was unsteady when I finally answered.
"Yes. That's understandable. She has experienced a lot of trauma." Carlisle responded, not sounding surprised. "The event was a very unfortunate accident, but from what Alice sees -"
"It's all my fault!" I cut him off. Though I needed his comfort I didn't want his sympathy. It wasn't something I deserved.
Before my father could say another word to downplay my part in this crime. Which it no doubt was a crime to drink from, and almost drain an angel. I explained everything from the very beginning of our argument to how I ended up losing control and biting my loving wife. My father listened to each word I spoke and at times I saw small movements in Bella's facial expression, and I began to feel a glimmer of hope. When I got to the ending of how I placed Bella on the log, I took a deep breath.
"I know this is difficult for you, Son, and that you are loathing yourself a bit." He spoke. "But you must be strong. Each time you're fearing the worst, listen to her heartbeat. As long as her heart is beating, your venom is following through her veins, she'll be okay."
"During the night she stopped breathing. Her heart stopped completely." My words came out as a sob. I hugged Bella's body to mine. "I performed CPR and bit her on her neck and above her heart."
"Biting her to release your venom into her system, after she was injured was the right thing to do." He reassured me. "Don't be so hard on yourself. You need to be strong for Bella. She needs you."
"I feel like I'm doing everything wrong." I blurted out. "All I want is for her to be fine. I'm not sure if she will."
My words were sad and full of anguish. I sobbed some more. I knew I needed to take his advice and be strong for my wife. However, it was very difficult at that moment in time to do so. Between sobs, I told him that. I also expressed how angry with myself I was for having a childish temper tantrum that was the result of this unfortunate event.
"With you being frozen as a teenager," My father spoke calmly. "Your temper is a bit childish at times. What wouldn't bother an adult tends to bother you and makes you angrier than needed." He pointed out. "Sometimes it seems you don't know how to verbally express yourself in a calm manner. Therefore, you use your temper to get your point across. Am I correct?"
"Yes." I answered shamefully. and added. "I never thought my temper would result with me hurting Bella. I love her so much. I can't believe I did this."
I sobbed some more. My father spoke words of comfort.
Though he was comforting me as well as trying to give me helpful advice about how to get more in control of my mood swings, something he had been trying to do since he created me. He did not condone in any way what I had done. He was not pleased with that.
"I wish you were here," I said as his lecture and my sobbing ended. "You would know exactly what to do."
"I wish I could be there with both of you too." Carlisle's tone was sincere.
"Then why don't you?" My question was more of a plea.
My words sounded very childish and echoed in the forest.
My father sighed. "I wish I could." He said sadly. "However, this is something you need to do on your own. Technically you're a grown, married man, in college now." He gently pointed out. "There's somethings that I wouldn't be doing you a favor if I took over for you. This is one of those things."
"But I can't do this on my own." I unintentionally whined.
"Yes, you can. Be strong." He reassured me. "You need to take care of your wife. From what Alice sees things will work out."
"You're sure?" I wondered anxiously.
"Quite sure." He said matter-of-factly. "If the outcome of Alice's visions were less than ideal, your mother and I would have been on our way to you by now. Though, this is an unfortunate circumstance, the outcome will be fine."
"But will Bella hate me for what I did? Will she want to leave me?" As I spoke my worst fears, it was obvious that I was panicking.
"From the first moment I saw you and Bella together," Carlisle began, not directly answering my questions. "I knew both of you were mates, though at the time both of you seemed to have an unspoken attraction." He chuckled a little. "However, mates do get into spats, as couples do. I don't believe that Bella could ever hate you." He explained, speaking words of wisdom. "Though, she may not be very happy with you for your actions. I honestly don't believe she will leave you after her transformation is complete."
"Did Alice say what Bella's reaction will be when she wakes up?" I wondered.
"No." Is all he said.
"But Alice saw her waking up?" I desperately needed to know.
"Yes, she did." He reassured me.
I let out a deep sigh. It was a troubling sound. Aside from wanting Bella to be okay I wanted to know if she'd be terribly mad at me for everything I had done.
Suddenly Bella let out a painful moan and her right hand twitched. My eyes remained on her, but my body froze. I was as still as a rock.
"I heard Bella. That's a good sign since she's been so quiet up until this point." Carlisle said, with a smile in his voice.
"She's making noise, but she hasn't opened her eyes," I rubbed my fingers over the side of her face. She moaned again.
"It's still a good sign." He spoke. "As long as she has a consistent heartbeat and makes a little noise, she'll be fine. Just wait and see, Alice's vision will come true."
"I wish I could be as confident as you." My throat was tight as I choked out the words.
Without having access to his thoughts, or without being able to see Alice's vision from her mind. I could only hope that the outcome of this horrible event would be good. Then again, when has my spiky haired sister or my father ever lied to me? The answer was never.
As always when I panic and overthink, my father did his best to soothe my fears. He reminded me again that as long as Bella had a steady heartbeat, my venom was running through her veins. Which would change her, it would just take time.
I knew he was right. But still I wanted a sign to know she'd be fine and still love me.
While my father began to instruct me that I needed to wash Bella up in a nearby river so the smell of blood would not be so potent and drive Bella mad when she'd wake. Her hand twitched. I watched as her fingers seemed to be reaching for something, though all she was grabbing was air. Immediately I took her hand in mine and interlaced our fingers together, hopping with all my might that she'd make it and would eventually forgive me. She didn't make a sound, but her hand was now holding mine.
Her hand felt warm in a way, but colder than before. Her change was happening, I finally began to make that connection.
Never letting go of Bella's hand, I listened intently to my father. His words were calm, full of love and wisdom, exactly what I needed, just like I needed to hold Bella's hand. Only did my father and I disconnect when Bella began to whipper.
It was evident that she needed me. She was my number one priority after all. I put my phone in my pocket, let go of her hand, and gently pulled Bella into my lap. She let out a loud whipper and her face scrunched up in pain. Knowing she was suffering, broke my dead heart. I cradled her to my chest as I kissed her head and began to hum her lullaby.
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Thank you for reading.
Any thoughts on how Bella might react after she wakes up to her new life as a vampire?
Think she will forgive Edward or not? Please leave a pleasant review. I enjoy hearing from you.