Cleaning Old Wounds

by Polkahotness

All his life Embry has wondered who his biological father was, and after phasing, he's known it could only be 1 of 3 people. As years have passed, he's buried this knowledge and decided he'd rather live life in the dark than learn the life-changing truth. But when a mysterious man shows up at his doorstep, he'll have to face his demons- and his mother's -once and for all. Post BD.

8. Getting Cool About A Lot of Stuff

Chapter's Song: "Sparks" - Coldplay

My eyelids fluttered as if hesitant to opening completely in order to see whatever universe I had transported to overnight. According to my eardrums, it was an alternate universe where laughing echoed through our hallway and into my room from downstairs; effectively pulling me awake from my dreams of nothingness. I groaned while tossing my body to lay on it's other side in hopes that I might be able to fall back asleep, however, I had no such luck. Aside from my ears picking up on two sets of quiet laughter, my nostrils deeply inhaled the smell of sweet, sweet coffee and as much as I wanted to fall back into dreamland, I couldn't just ignore the call of the dark liquid and it's addicting caffeine.

I mean, it was coffee. Ma never made coffee- she was a tea kind of lady, which basically meant that if I ever wanted caffeine in the form of coffee, I had to get it somewhere else or wake up even earlier than I usually did to make it which just really wasn't an option if I were being honest with myself. I wasn't a morning person.

Let me re-state that: I am not a morning person. After years and years of sneaking out late at night to run patrols and do other wolf-y things, my body-clock had just become accustomed to sleeping in every morning in lieu of waking up early. So I feel like I don't need to explain why I wasn't very pleased that the laughter and coffee scent had woken me up at a good 9am- especially after the lengthy night I'd had between Ma and Joshua just literal hours ago.

Sitting up in irritation on my bed, I finally forced my eyes open in a squinted sort of fashion and took a deep breath while glancing around my messy room. After a few tired blinks, I reached my arms up to the ceiling and stretched my body out as tall I could from a seated position and then dropped my arms to fall heavily on my lap before throwing whatever part of my blanket remained off of me. In a quicker-than-I-expected-for-this-early-in-the-morning fashion, I swung my legs over the side of the bed and reached down to the floor to find the sweater I'd worn the day before and throw it on my body.

"Pants, pants, pants," I muttered to myself as I glanced around the room for a clean article of clothing. Finally, I spotted a pair of black sweats that I'd discarded and lazily threw on the ground a couple days earlier. Those'll do, I thought to myself. With a huff, I pushed myself up from the bed to stand and walk over to where they lay on the floor. Grabbing them quickly, I pulled them onto my body in one fluid motion and prepared myself to meet the 'happy couple' I could hear giggling downstairs.

It was an odd concept, having Joshua in our house after everything that had happened over the passed few days and, technically, my lifetime. However, as Ma's laughter floated through my doorway and into my ears I couldn't help but be curious as to seeing it for myself. With bare feet, I crept out of my room to walk quietly down the hallway where I stood unassuming at the top of the stairs looking out into the kitchen where the pair was seated.

They faced each other, each holding a steaming mug in front of where they sat at our dining room table. Whatever Joshua was talking about, Ma seemed entranced by his every word and a smile was painted on her face in a way I'd never seen before.

I always knew Ma wasn't the happiest of people. She'd never gone out to really try dating from what I knew, and there were nights I heard her crying in her room for no apparent reason. While I tried to blame myself as it was easier that way, my subconscious always blamed Joshua (though I hadn't known his identity at the time) for what I decided was breaking my Ma's heart. I knew she wanted companionship and love, but as a kid, you can't really go out and get that for your parents- ultimately they have to do it for themselves and Ma just never showed interest in finding it for whatever reason.

But as I watched the two of them communicate with each other, I couldn't help but feel my mouth curl up into a sort of half-smile. For the first time in my life, I could see my Ma happy, genuinely happy. Every word that came from Joshua's lips seemed to make Ma's smile grow bigger and there was this kind of glow around her, an aura if you will, that made me see her in a light I'd never witnessed. She looked warm. She looked satisfied. She looked complete.

As much as I hated Joshua for what he'd done to the two of us, I couldn't help but admit that the imprint had to be real as I watched the two interact. I saw sparks- and it was plain to see that they were flying effortlessly between them.

Deciding to leave them be, I figured I'd just hang out in my room for a little bit longer and maybe try the whole sleeping thing again. With a twist of my body, I turned around to head back for my room only to walk over one of the many spots in the hallway of the old house that just so happened to let out a loud SQUEAK and I immediately knew in that moment that I was busted for spying.

"Embry?" Ma called out from the kitchen and I spun around to face her with a guilty expression lining my face.

"Oh, hey Ma," I tried in a very unconvincing casual tone. "Joshua, good to uh—to see that you had a good nights sleep... from the couch" I enunciated which only made me chuckle and nod his head.

"Trust me, Embry, it was certainly more comfortable than my tent out in the woods," he responded which in turn made Ma giggle and I raised my brow curiously at her, though she took no notice. It was obvious she was currently lost in some kind of imprint-induced-coma.

"Yeah," I answered while reaching up to rub at the back of my neck and sighed. "I uh, I can imagine. Well, I was just going back to bed so-"

Ma then came out of her trance and turned to look at me as I tried to make my escape. "Embry," she said in a cheerful tone, "you're never up this early, why don't you come join us?"

I smirked and shook my head. "I don't know, Ma. I really wouldn't want to interrupt whatever is uh-" I reached out and gestured towards the two of them, "-happening here."

"No interruption!" Ma said quickly as if she were the one to be guilty about something. "Please?" She tried again in a calmer tone. "Joshua even made some eggs for breakfast and we couldn't possibly eat them all."

Pretty sure he could, I thought to myself knowing how the phasing body works in terms of appetite, but I sighed and looked down at my feet awkwardly. "Really, I'm pretty tired still-"

This time it was Joshua's turn to try and convince me, "It's really fine, Embry. There's coffee too. Tiff mentioned how much you like it and I haven't had coffee in..." he laughed at himself, "well it feels like it's been ages."

I furrowed my brows at his nickname for my Ma. Tiff? Jeez... they sure got caught up fast. We're past first-name basis already and started with the nicknaming already. With a deep breath, I decided it was probably best I just do what they wanted and I silently nodded my head once before making my way down the stairs to enter the kitchen.

"You uh," I said quietly to Ma with a quick glance in Joshua's direction, "you both been up a while I take it?" I stopped to lean my lower back casually against the kitchen counter; my hands reaching behind me to rest on the smooth edge of the countertop.

"Oh, not really," Joshua tried but Ma interrupted him to boast.

"Really Josh?" She said amid a slight chuckle before twisting her body around to face me, "I was up at 6 like usual only to be scared half to death by Joshua sleeping on our couch."

I bit my lip and sucked in some air before letting my lip go and saying in a guilty voice, "Yeah... I sorta told him he could crash here instead of- you know –in a tent in the middle of winter outside."

Ma waved me an 'I-could-care-less' wave before twisting back around to face Joshua again. "It's fine, Embry, he just startled me was all! I'm surprised you didn't wake up from the yelp I made, but it woke Josh up and we just... got to talking? I guess?" She let out a small laugh and I furrowed my brow while smirking slightly.

"Catching up, really. It's just been so long," Joshua said softly and Ma smiled a warm smile in his direction as if she had forgotten I was in the room and spoke quietly back to him.

"Too long," she added to his sentence and after an awkward moment of silence between the three of us, I cleared my throat to pull Ma and Joshua out of their weird lovey-dovey trance they were partaking in directly in front of my eyes.

"Right, well," Ma quickly stated in a mild sense of panic at having been caught displaying her adoration for Joshua, "you uh, you should have some food! Food, yes. I know you like eggs and there is plenty left on the stove."

I rolled my eyes but they landed on the skillet sitting on the dead burner. The scrambled eggs that lay inside stared over at me and my stomach growled at me to take some. However, my pride spoke out for me. "Don't think you two can win me over with food. I can't be bought that way."

Ma gave Joshua a knowing look, "Oh, believe me, he can." He eyed me for a moment before returning his eyes to Ma, a smile lining his lips.

Scoffing, I shook my head in denial even though I knew those eggs would eventually find a way into my bottomless stomach at some point. Instead, I decided to prolong the inevitable and turned around to reach in the cupboard and grab a clean mug which I then promptly filled with coffee from the nearby coffeepot.

"So Embry," Joshua said and I glanced over my shoulder at him before returning my gaze to the mug in my hands filled to the brim with piping hot liquid. "You have plans today?"

I raised my brow inquisitively, "Why? You and my Ma have plans today? Or were you two planning to spend some 'quality time' together? That why you don't want me around?" My question was laced with innuendo and Ma was quick to snap her head in my direction.

"Embry!" She exclaimed, her face now beat red and I couldn't help but chuckle to myself at seeing her in such a way. It was like she was a whole different person and I had to admit- it was kind of entertaining to see her so embarrassed. Sure, I wasn't fond of Joshua hanging around and all that, but it was nice to see Ma so happy.

Joshua just better not ditch this time around because he could be sure I'd hunt his ass down and he'd regret it.

"What?" I asked with a sly smile plastered on my face.

"That's... that's wildly inappropriate. You know that. I'm your mother." Her face grew redder by the second and I glanced at Joshua who was giving me an unenthused look.

Knowing it was irritating Joshua to bring up his and Ma's relationship, I decided to press onward. It's the small things that bring the most joy after all, and as small as the mild irritation he was feeling was, it was totally worth it in exchange for some slight uncomfortable conversation between me and Ma.

Bringing the mug up to my lips I took a big gulp before exhaling loudly in satisfaction. "Yeah, but is it though?" I questioned and paused for a moment before continuing. "I mean, wasn't it you Ma who told me yesterday, this morning if we're being technical, I quote," I cleared my throat dramatically before saying in a high-pitched goofy voice as if I were pretending to be her, "'There's nothing disgusting about sex. Everyone has sex.'"

"I-I-" She stuttered, but I continued anyway.

"You then proceeded to tease me about my sex life so why can't I do the same? You can dish it but you can't take it, huh Ma?" I joked and she sighed as if giving up in the debate.

"So...plans..." Joshua attempted to redirect the conversation in an effort to save some face for Ma and I shrugged my shoulders while taking another sip from my mug.

"Nothing really," I answered. "I guess I thought I'd stop in and see how packing is going for Jake."

Ma perked up at the sound of my best friend's name. "Jacob? Jacob Black?" She asked and I smirked.

"Yeah, Ma. Jacob Black. He's only been my best friend since birth and all. Who else is there? Is there even another Jake on the rez?" I replied, but Joshua interjected with a point of his finger in my direction before talking once again.

"Wait, wait, wait, he's packing? For what? He isn't moving, is he?" Joshua asked almost urgently and I nodded my head slowly with a mildly confused expression now coating my face.

"Uh, yeah, he's moving. What's it to you?" My words were defensive almost but Ma was quick to chime in with her own information. I'm sure she knew the whole Jake leaving thing was a touchy subject for me.

"I heard from Billy that him and his girlfriend were taking off with the Cullen family or something. He didn't seem all that concerned, but it's kind of odd, don't you think? The whole family uprooting like that together and then Jacob and his girlfriend tagging along? I hope Jacob isn't caught up in something weird with that family..." Ma's voice was fully of worry but I shook my head and tried to quickly dissolve her clear anxiety.

"The Cullens are...weird to say the least but he's fine, and I'm sure he'll be back to visit all the time. That family is LOADED," I said as more of a thought out loud, but Ma of course had more questions about my statement.

"Why would they pay for Jacob to come back to visit Forks? It isn't like he's a part of their family."

I nodded my head for a long while before blinking rapidly and shrugging my shoulders. "Honestly, I don't know. They're just really nice? Honestly Ma, it's none of our business but I promise you, if Billy isn't worried then you shouldn't be either."

"Well what about this girlfriend of his?" Ma continued. "We've never seen her, have you met her? Is she nice?"

I glanced over to Joshua who was merely keeping quiet and listening carefully. "Pretty sure she's not his girlfriend, but yeah, Ma. She's fine. I really don't know why you're so hung up on this. Were you hung up on his sisters when they moved out too?"

"Jacob is like family, Embry," Ma said with a smile. "I just feel like it seems really fast between them... you know? I only just heard about her when you told me what, a month ago?"

I shifted my eyes back and forth in my sockets. "They've been in each other's lives for... a while," was all I could manage to come up with and I silently prayed she'd just drop the subject already.

Ma sighed before pushing herself up to stand and wander over in my direction to place her empty tea mug in the sink. "I guess... good for Jacob then. Maybe someday soon you will find your person too and can move out as you rightfully should at your age."

I set my empty mug down on the counter beside me and crossed my arms over my chest. "Oh yeah? What's that supposed to mean, Ma? You trying to kick me out?"

She walked over to me from the sink and placed a hand on my cheek momentarily before dropping her hand. "Of course not, sweetie. I just want you to find yourself some happiness. Why not talk to this pretty girlfriend of Jacob's? Maybe she has a friend she can set you up with."

"First of all, she is not his girlfriend," I affirmed given their incredibly complicated relationship. I then let out a laugh and shook my head. "And as for setting me up with somebody? Well, I really, highly doubt that, Ma."

"Oh Embry, don't be so negative. Just ask! Who knows? She may have the perfect match for you." After she sat back down at the table beside Joshua, she turned around to look at me once more. "Where did those two meet anyway? It certainly wasn't in La Push."

With a deep breath I pursed my lips before letting out the air in my lungs to offer up a vague answer. "Oh, you know. Around."

"Well where is around, exactly?" Ma pressed on and I frowned at her persistence. "School maybe? A friend?"

I glanced around myself in the kitchen being sure to avert my eyes from either my Ma or Joshua as I answered. "You could say it was through a friend, yeah."

"Which friend?" She pushed further and this time I looked at her with an expression of severe annoyance plastered on my face.

"Charlie's daughter Bella. We done with the third degree now, Ma or what?" I asked with heavy sarcasm laced in my tone.

She merely shrugged her shoulders as she began to try and explain herself. "I'm sorry, Embry. It's just that you haven't had a girlfriend in so long and I figured maybe this friend, seeing as you won't talk to Jacob's girlfriend, might be of some help."

"Not his girlfriend," I re-iterated before rolling my eyes and offering a minimal shake of my head. "And honestly, Ma, I don't need a blind date or to be set up with someone's friend. I'm fine."

Unfortunately, my reassurance wasn't enough to ease Ma's mind. "You're just getting older now and I don't want you to miss your opportunity to find yourself a partner. Is that so wrong?" Ma glanced over at Joshua in hopes he would back her up.

Instead, he simply reached out to set a hand on her shoulder and looked at her with a warm smile. "I'm sure Embry will find somebody soon enough. He's still young. He has time."

"But do I?" Ma asked him while looking down at her hands and inspecting them as if some hidden message was written on the backs that looked up at her. "Look at me. I look so old compared to you, Joshua. I just haven't aged as well as you and who knows how much time I have left to be a grandma anyway?"

Ma's voice had softened and it sounded like she was holding back tears. Lucky for me, Joshua was hot on the case and took her hands in his which forced her to quit examining her hands and instead look up at him.

In a reassuring voice, Joshua told her, "Tiff, you have lots of time left. Age is just a number, not a death sentence."

"Well it sure feels like one," Ma murmured and I watched silently from where I stood as the two shared this intimate conversation I didn't feel privy to witnessing with my own two eyes.

Either way, they had seemed to forget I was in close proximity to them and continued in their conversation which only made me feel like a fly on the wall onlooking a private moment.

"It's just that," Ma went on, now looking away from him to focus on their hands as they held onto one another on the table's surface, "I look in the mirror and I hardly recognize the old face that looks back at me. Age has taken my beauty and glow and replaced it with all these wrinkles..." Her voice trailed off as her head dropped further to face the tabletop almost completely.

Joshua, now wearing a melancholy sort of smile, reached out to tilt her chin upward so she could look at him directly. Her eyes searched his for a moment, tears threatening to spill over and onto her cheeks. Slowly, Joshua proceeded to speak after a moment of silence; his voice calm and collected but the volume of it just above a whisper.

"Mirrors lie, Tiffany," he explained in a soothing tone. "To me, you're just as beautiful as the first time I saw you in that diner all those years ago. The glow could never dim from you or that smile."

At his words, Ma's lips upturned into a small smile. "Really?"

Joshua nodded his head. "Really," he answered and the two began to lean in to one another, prepared to kiss in front of me and possibly scar me for the rest of my natural born life.

Quickly, I decided to chime in and make my presence known in an effort to thwart them from their PDA which I wasn't particularly in the mood to witness this early in the morning.

"Hey, hey, hey!" I exclaimed while closing my eyes tightly and holding both of my hands up in a double wave as if the action alone could rub out what was happening before my eyes like some sort of eraser. "In case you two have forgotten, I'm kind of still in the vicinity."

Bright red colored Ma's cheeks from embarrassment while Joshua simply turned his head away from me to hide whatever expression was covering his face- I personally hoped it was a mortified one.

"Sorry, sweetie," Ma apologized while letting go of Joshua's hands and reaching up to set her palms on her cheeks in an effort to cool them down. "Guess we got carried away."

I scoffed at her response. "Yeah, I'll say." With that, I turned to grab my empty mug from where it sat beside me on the counter and walked it over to set it in the sink next to Ma's. "Well, I'm off I guess," I said definitively before making my way out of the kitchen in pursuit of the door.

"Where are you off to, exactly?" Ma asked and I stopped in my tracks at the halfway point of the kitchen and the front door to pivot around in order to face where her and Joshua still sat at the table.

"I already told you, I'm going to Jake's. Remember?"

Ma tsked her tongue but not out of disappointment towards me like she tends to do- it was more a tsking out of disappointment at herself for forgetting so quickly. I'm sure she blamed it on her age silently in her head, but she didn't say anything about it out loud and I was thankful. By not saying it out loud, she saved me from once again seeing Joshua try console her by putting the moves on my Ma directly in front of me.

I shuddered at the memory but tried to tell myself it was the imprint between the two of them that made them this lovey-dovey in front of me, not complete lack of respect for my feelings.

"Well, you have a good time," Ma encouraged from where she sat. "Be sure to tell Jacob that I say 'hi.'"

"I will, Ma," I answered as I turned around to continue making my way to my escape from the house.

Just as I reached for the handle of the door to freedom, Ma called out, "And tell him to stop by before he moves!"

I smirked to myself and nodded my head. "Alright Ma! I'm leaving now!"

And with that, I exited the house at last into the wintry morning that surrounded me; my sights set on heading over to the Cullen's place so I could talk to Jake about the plan I'd hatched up regarding Sam.

However, before I could even leave my property, I heard the door open and close from behind me and I turned around to see Joshua jogging after me with my coat in tow. "Embry!" he called out and I sighed to myself while shoving my hands into the pockets of my sweatpants.

"She realized I didn't have a coat, huh?" I questioned with a half-smile.

To my surprise, Joshua shook his head. "No, I did."

I raised my brow in confusion at his statement and sudden concern. "Dude, you know I don't really need that-"

Joshua was quick to cut me off. "It's an excuse. I uh, I wanted to talk to you about something."

Blinking a couple of times, I shrugged and gestured with my head for him to go on while verbally encouraging him. "Okay. What's up?"

"It's just that I didn't want to ask in front of your mom is all," he further explained and I sighed while looking at him in exasperation.

"Right..." I said while elongating the vowel in the word. "I kinda figured that seeing as you felt the need to make an excuse to come after me. What is it?"

Joshua looked down at his feet as if to summon the courage to ask me his question before taking a deep breath and finally said, "Is Jacob Black really leaving the pack to be with the Cullen family?"

I eyed him curiously. "Yeah, he is. Why does it matter to you?"

"It doesn't," he answered immediately before pausing and then continuing. "I just wanted to know when he was planning on doing that."

"I don't know, he said sometime after the new year," I answered very matter-of-factly but Joshua continued to stare at me as if waiting for more information. After a moment, I decided to give him what I thought he was looking for. "He's appointed Leah to take over for him as Alpha but we'll be fine. Jacob wants to be with his imprint and nobody blames him for that."

"No, I get all that," he told me in a sort of defensive tone.

"Then what is it?" I wondered aloud and Joshua let out a deep breath he must have been holding before asking the question he'd been leading up to this entire time.

"I was just hoping maybe Jacob would be able to talk Sam into meeting with me or something... so I can explain. Do you think he would?"

I frowned and said with little emotion, "Joshua. Why do you think I'm headed to see Jake right now?"

"To help with packing?"

I closed my eyes softly to center myself before opening them again to look at Joshua who was watching me with confused eyes. "No, man. I just said all that so Ma wouldn't ask more questions. I'm going there now to ask him for his help seeing as Sam and I aren't allowed to talk to each other at the moment."

"Why's that?" Joshua asked and I chewed on my lip for a moment before vaguely answering.

"Jake thinks it might be best after our last...interaction." I shook my head at the memory in hopes of momentarily erasing it to focus on the task at hand. "Honestly, it doesn't matter, okay? I have it under control. I think."

Joshua nodded once before offering a small smile of gratitude to me. "Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah," I said while waving off his gratuity. "You'd better get back before Ma comes looking after you."

He glanced over his shoulder to look back towards the house where Ma still sat inside. "Right," he responded before turning around to start walking to the front door of my home.

After a few paces away from me, I called out after him, "Hey, Joshua!"

He turned around almost anxiously and looked at me with hopeful eyes. "Yeah?"

I gestured to my coat which was still in his grasp. "You should probably give me my coat. Seeing as that's why you came out here and all."

"Right. Good thinking."

Joshua walked back to my to hand me my coat and I pulled it on before parting ways from him to finally leave my property in pursuit of the Cullen's home. As I walked, my mind incessantly played through how exactly I was going to get Jake to let me talk to Sam. But all the while, my thoughts somehow kept finding their way back to a question I hadn't bothered to indulge for fear of the answer: what if Sam doesn't believe me about the imprint- or possibly worse yet –what if he does?

---

Glancing around at the sea of boxes that surrounded us in the living room, I plopped myself down on the couch that still remained as Jake eyed me curiously after the words I'd just spoken to him.

"You want me to call off the alpha order?" He shook his head while crossing his arms. "You've gotta be kidding me, Bry. You two almost killed each other at the bonfire!"

I scoffed at his statement and tried to convince him of my now good intentions. "C'mon, Jake. I have to talk to Sam or Joshua could seriously be in trouble when it comes to him. He needs to understand what happened."

"What you think happened," Jake added before reaching over to a tall bookcase and beginning to grab books only to toss them into the box beside him.

"I know it happened, man. Seriously! You think I don't know what imprinting looks like? I've seen practically everyone from the original pack imprint before me. Besides, you and I both know the way imprints act around each other- I know I'm not wrong, here."

With a sigh, Jake stopped with the books for a moment to turn his head and look over at me where I sat. "Okay, so let's say he did imprint on your mom. What exactly were you planning to tell Sam? You know he won't believe you no matter what you think you saw."

"That's the point, Jake. If I at least just tell him what I know happened, maybe it will nudge him in the direction of wanting to talk to Joshua for himself. He can make up his own mind at that point but we have to do something to get them to talk." Jake sighed again and returned his attention to the books and the box.

"I don't know, man..." He muttered, but I was persistent.

"Think about it," I continued as Jake kept on putting books in the cardboard box, "if we can get them to talk it could prevent so many possible future problems. Sam can't possibly be completely livid at Joshua if what happened to him is basically what happened to Sam, Leah and Emily. The dude's stubborn but not completely heartless."

Jake dropped another book into the box and turned to face me once more. "I just don't want the two of you getting into it again."

"We won't!" I exclaimed in hopes I was at least starting to wear him down. "If you really want to, you can even come mediate or whatever."

"Seriously?" He asked with mild annoyance in his tone. "Look around at this house, Embry. There is so much to pack. I just don't think I should ditch in the middle of this. I want to, and honestly I probably should given what happened the other night, but I shouldn't."

"Shouldn't what?" a familiar voice rang through the hallway before Nessie' face came into light from the hallway as she entered the living room.

Without even turning around, Jake answered her while still eyeing me. "Embry wants me to accompany him in talking to Sam about their father."

She glanced over at me before making it to Jake's side and smiling softly. "Sorry to hear about all of that," she told me and I shrugged my shoulders.

"It'll work itself out. It would work itself out faster if Jake here would call off his alpha order and let me just go talk to him myself but he doesn't trust me." My words were pointed and Jake rolled his eyes at my comment.

"It's not that I don't trust you," he tried as Ness looked up at him with a small smile lining her lips.

"Than what is it?" I asked with mild anger.

"I just think it could get messy between you two."

"Then come with me!" I cried out in exasperation.

"I can't leave here though, man. I gotta help pack—" But Ness was quick to come to my rescue.

"Really, Jacob?" She said quizzically. "You want to help a house full of vampires who don't sleep pack for the millionth time? Please. They'll have this whole place packed and ready to go by tonight. Go."

"But Ness," Jake pleaded and her eyes narrowed as her expression changed from cheerful to irritated almost instantaneously.

"Jacob... we talked about this," she said through clenched teeth and I raised my eyebrow as I watched the pair converse.

Jake held his hands up in a surrender; his face apologetic as he began to ask for forgiveness. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's habit, alright? I just gotta get used to it is all."

"It's just that you need to set an example to my parents," she went on to say and I eyed them curiously as she continued. "You know this is my chance to start out fresh and be the kind of person I feel I am and want to be. My true, authentic self. You gotta support me..."

"I do! I do support you, really." He reached out to cup her face in his hand before softly rubbbing her cheek with his thumb for a brief moment and she smiled up at him.

Me on the other hand, I stood watching them in complete confusion. "What's uh... what's going on here?" I asked and Nessie turned to look at me as Jake began to explain.

"It's her name. She doesn't like it," he said as she smirked and shook her head.

"You know it's more than that, Jacob." She let out a breath before finally beginning to explain herself. "I can't just show up at a new school with the name 'Renesmee.' As beautiful of a tribute it is to my grandmas, I will not survive high school time after time with a name like that."

I nodded my head once in understanding. She had a good point- kids are horrible these days. I could only imagine the kind of ridicule she'd face and the nicknames people would surely come up with. "I mean... that makes sense to me. Your parents aren't behind you?"

She looked down at her feet in embarrassment. "It's not that they don't support me, they simply don't understand. Mom is especially hurt by it and I think Dad is just going along with her because he loves her and all."

"Okay, so what did you want to change your name to instead?" I wondered and at this question she lifted her head to grin in my direction.

"Well, I proposed that at each school we go to, I will simply change my name to that of a middle name from any one of the strong female influences in my life," Jake looked over at her with a loving smile and she happily looked up at him while continuing to talk. "My parents argument about my name is that it was meant to be a tribute so I just figured this can be a tribute all it's own. I want to honor all of the wonderful role models around me."

"That's a cool idea and all, but won't that be confusing for everyone in the family? I mean, changing names like that all the time... I feel like they might slip up once in a while and call you by the wrong name, won't they?"

Ness was quick to answer me with a question of her own. "Don't you think it would be a much bigger slip-up for my mom to get so angry that people are picking on me because of my name that she goes all vampire-hulk-mamabear on some random human? Or my dad since he could hear everything everyone was thinking?"

I reached up to rub at the back of my neck and chuckled nervously. "Yeah...yeah I guess that makes sense."

"Besides," she added, "I know they'd freak out. They could hardly control themselves when they found out about the social media account I made and was instantly attacked for that name. It wouldn't be any different in real life."

"Does that mean you'll keep changing your name at home too? Like... what should I call you?" I wondered aloud and her smile widened.

"Just call me Carlie. I like my middle name because it's fairly normal in comparison to my real name." She shrugged her shoulders, "Everyone else said it won't be a problem to remember Carlie at home and whatever in school. But someone just can't seem to grasp the concept..." Her eyes gravitated over to Jake and he looked at her sheepishly.

"I'll get it by the time we move, alright? Sorry I don't have freakishly-perfect memory like the rest of your family..." Jake teased and Ness—I mean Carlie –reached up to lightly hit him on the arm.

"Point is," she said while turning to face me once more, "I want to have a normal life as much as humanly possible, you know? And I just don't think I can have that with my actual name. I already have a weird life as it is and I don't need any added stress. Plus, I kind of like the idea of starting over every few years and being whoever and whatever I want. It's almost like improv acting or something."

Chuckling, I agreed with her. "If you're into that, sure. Carlie," I emphasized her new name and she beamed over at me.

"Anyway, Jacob," she said as he turned to look at her, "I really think you should go with Embry. Everyone needs someone in their corner for support. This is kind of a big deal."

"Yeah, man. It's a really big deal," I repeated to him while he looked between the two of us.

"And I promise," Carlie went on, "that the packing will get done regardless of you being here for a few extra hours or not."

With a small smile, he nodded his head, "Alright, fine... Let's get going then." He then faced Carlie once more, "I'll see you later?"

"I'll be here," she said and he offered her a friendly wave before walking passed me to the front door where I followed close behind after giving a lone nod in his imprint's direction.

Once we were outside and out of earshot, I picked up my pace slightly so I could walk beside Jake. "So that name thing... when did she decide all of that?"

Jake thought for a moment before responding. "A couple weeks ago I think? I'm not really sure but it was pretty recent. She's just been so stressed lately with the move and everything... I think it's really getting to her."

I furrowed my brows and focused ahead of us as we began walking through the dense woods in the direction of the reservation. "Stressed? Why?"

"Think about it, Bry. This will be her first time going to a public school. They offered her to stay home with Esme for the first year or so until she got her bearings but she didn't like the idea of sitting trapped in the house all day, even though I told her I could skip with her." He shook his head as if to organize the thoughts and memories roaming his brain. "But she wants to go to school and I don't blame her. Honestly, I think she'll be just fine but she thinks she won't fit in."

I laughed at the thought. She'd always seemed normal to me despite the crazy fast growing thing. "How wouldn't she fit in? Isn't she done growing or whatever?"

"Exactly," he agreed, "according to that Nahuel dude Alice and Jasper found, she is done growing and Carlisle says mentally she is up to par with people in their 20's even though technically she's only 7."

"So what is she worried about then?" I couldn't help but question and Jake sighed sadly.

"She doesn't think she will fit in socially with everyone and be on the same level grade-wise with her classmates." He jeered at this idea of hers and went on. "I keep telling her she'll be just fine, but she doesn't believe me. You know her, she's stubborn just like Bella."

"I think I get it. She wants to do this name thing to fit in better with everyone, huh? Not draw attention to herself and whatnot," I stated and Jake nodded his head.

"It makes me sad though, the name thing, but not for the same reasons that Bella has and all." He stopped walking for a moment and I quit walking too to turn and look at him as he explained. "It's just... I knew the name was crazy when Bella picked it out but I didn't say anything. That's why I started calling her Nessie and then Ness because I wanted to establish anything other than that name for her since one day she might want something more...normal. But then Bella went on that rampage saying it was like the loch ness monster and I know that Ness—Carlie, she sees it as almost worse to be called that."

"Worse to be called Ness and Nessie?"

"She said it's like her name is a monster which is a reflection of her because she isn't human or even a vampire like the rest of her family. It's complicated," Jake settled on and I frowned while glancing down at my feet and then back up to him.

"Her name is unique though," I countered, "she doesn't see it like that?"

"Absolutely not," he replied. "She says her name makes her feel like a literal monster along with her biology. As for the whole 'unique' argument... her parents tried that route to make her feel better. They tried to tell her how special she is and that she's this one of a kind person but Carlie... she just doesn't see it that way."

"Trust me, man, you don't have to tell me. Quil and I rode that train of weird names. It gets to you after a while." I chuckled to myself and began walking towards the reservation once again with Jake following me at my pace. "At least her name has meaning behind it though. I got a sexy soap-opera star name for the rest of my existence."

"Eh, you rock it though," he told me with a laugh and a hard slap on the back.

"I see things are shifting between you and Carlie," I noted as we continued to walk through the woods and Jake shrugged his shoulders.

"You know, it's weird," Jake replied thoughtfully while focusing on the terrain ahead of us. "Everyone has assumed this whole time that imprinting is this... this inherently romantic thing, right? But with Carlie it's... it's not like that at all, even though she's now fully aged and all that."

"What do you mean?"

"It's like," he began only to pause and re-think his words before continuing. "I don't see her in a romantic way? And I don't think I ever will, honestly. She's like this sister, best friend, kindred spirit type of connection."

"Oh," was all I could manage to say. Jake began laughing at this and I soon turned to look at him in curiosity. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing, it's just," he let out a chuckle again before calming himself enough to finish talking. "There's just a lot of questioning things in her mind and, I never thought I'd say this, but I like having somebody so close, who's a woman, without that romantic aspect."

"So, it's like how you felt with Bella?" I suggested and Jake nodded his head slowly.

"Sort of, but I don't feel how I felt for Bella with Carlie." He shrugged his shoulders. "It's different. It's not what we all thought it was- this imprinting thing. I even feel like maybe someday, I could go on and have a romantic relationship should the time come. But Carlie will always be my number one- like a family member. Like a niece I guess."

Furrowing my brow, I quietly asked, "Do you think you'll end up dating people then, or what?"

Jake shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. Maybe someday, but for now... I think I just like not having any drama. Life's hard enough without adding in all that romance mumbo-jumbo."

We walked for a while in silence, the only sound between us the crunching of the snow beneath our feet as we weaved through the trees of the woods. With our long strides, I continued to consider the points that Jake had made up.

All my life since phasing, I'd assumed that Imprinting was this soul-mate force on our souls because of our wolfy genes. And yet... somehow... it's not? It's almost like the imprint gives you what you need, and whether that's love or a lifelong connection to your best friend... it gives it to you.

Suddenly I found renewed hope in this. If it could happen for Jake, did that mean that all other imprinting that feels terrifying and straight up gross and wrong... could it all just be what Jake had described? Best friends for life?

It didn't take all that long to get to La Push and as we grew nearer to Sam and Emily's house, I couldn't help but think back to what Ma had said earlier about Jake leaving Billy behind.

So with great care and empathy, I decided to ask him. "You think it will be hard and all? Leaving your dad behind?"

Jake eyed me for a moment as if trying to figure out my motivation behind the question but decided to answer anyway. "Sure, sure. It'll be really hard to leave him but he wanted me to go with the Cullens oddly enough."

This surprised me. "Wait- really? He told you he wanted you to go?"

"I mean, not in so many words," Jake said hesitantly. "But he knows that it's really hard to be away from imprints. So I don't think he wants me to go so much as understands and gives me his blessing."

"Will he be okay?" I asked and Jake waved a nonchalant hand at me.

"Oh yeah. He has plenty of people on the rez to help him if he really needs it and Charlie is always over visiting anyway." Jake smirked to himself. "It's probably good for them- they can keep each other company with Bella and I gone. Honestly, I'm not that worried because my dad is a strong, independent guy. I'm just sad is all."

"You'll still visit and all though, right?" The words came out faster and more intense than I'd wanted them to, but Jake merely smiled and nodded his head as we approached Sam and Emily's place.

"Don't worry, Bry. You can't get rid of me that easily."

And with that, we climbed the stairs leading up to Sam's front door; both of us exchanging a look before taking a deep breath as I reached out to knock three times.

Guess there wasn't much turning back now.