*Ana's POV*

I watch from our cabana on Tybee Island as Christian makes his way back out of the water. My mouth goes slack as a hand slips through his hair, pushing it off his forehead. Water droplets pour down his form, tracing the curves of his tight, strong body. His black shorts are sticking to him, showing off his muscular legs and the soft bulge of his endowment. I'm unable to move. I think I've stroked.

In my periphery, I see a couple people stop and stare at my Adonis, but I can't blame them. The beauty that is Christian should be appreciated and admired. The fact that his eyes don't leave mine and that he makes his way straight for me also helps stowe my jealousy.

He climbs up beside me on the cabana bed and pulls up the tank of my tankini swimsuit a little more so his hand can rest against the skin of my bump.

I run my my own hand through his wet hair and grip the damp ends at his nape to pull him closer for a kiss. "You're so sexy."

He grins. "Glad you like what you see."

I hum in response and roll toward him. "More than like. More than love...It's like an addiction. One that I hope I never have to overcome." My hand slips down his body, tracing over his abs.

"Ah, the one addiction I don't mind enabling." He tickles my side, making me squeal and squirm. "Your addiction to me better never go away. I know mine won't."

His eyes are light, a starburst of grays bursting outward from his pupils. He's a piece of art.

I bite my bottom lip, but quickly release it when the soreness comes to the surface. I know I need to talk to him about Mom and I don't want anything to ruin this moment.

"Your mind is reeling. Tell me."

I give him a soft smile, wanting him to know that everything is okay. I know I devastated him just as much as I devastated myself earlier and I don't want him to worry anymore.

"I was just thinking about my mother... if regular therapy and AA will be enough. It's obvious that she's miserable and that she has a history of misery. I know I should be angry with her for trying to get me to postpone the marriage, but-"

"Woah, wait. Time out. She told you not to marry me?"

I sigh. "She said that maybe I should hold off a little... until the newness wears off. She said she researched you and saw all the women you were with and that she didn't want me to end up miserable like her because I gave you everything of me only to have you turn around and betray me. Cheat. She said once the newness wears off you might go looking for someone with more experience since all I know is you." I guess he and I never did go over what my mother had said. I only realize this now. I see his gray eyes darken and I know thunderstorm Christian is close by.

He lets out a puff of air and pulls me close to him, tucking me under his chin so my head snuggles into his chest. He rests his chin on the top of my head while his hand finds my backside, gripping my cheek roughly. The possessiveness of it all makes me grin and I kiss his chest. He's trying to cocoon me and keep me. I'm not going anywhere, baby.

"I'm yours, Ace."

"You've given me the most beautiful parts of you, Ana. There is no way I'll betray you. I have your heart, your mind, and your body. I've reciprocated with mine. I have nothing left to give anyone else."

The intensity at which Christian feels and his ability to articulate those feelings make me fall even deeper for him. He's got the deepest soul of anyone I know and I consider myself the luckiest woman on the planet.

"I don't either. It wouldn't be fair to be with anyone else when I couldn't give them any part of me. You're it, Christian. The only option I'll choose."

He presses a kiss to my hair. "No matter how many options come sauntering your way?"

I giggle. "Nope. Let them try. No one can saunter like you."

"You aren't thinking about postponing our marriage, are you? I need to be with you, Ana. I want to be bound to you. I need you to be my final contract. To be mine forever. A sacred covenant."

My heart clenches at his words. Our marriage means so much more to him than I realize. "The end of the old life, beginning of the new?"

"Beginning of the better. I want you to bind me to you and I want to do the same with you."

Oh, I like this. "You're going to let me bind you, Mr. Grey?"

He groans. "Yes, please."

Pulling away from me just enough to look at me, he searches my face. "You sound like you want this covenant with me, but you haven't pulled the trigger. It's been weeks and you haven't said a word about a wedding."

My heart jumps at the word. "Oh. I guess I've been so wrapped up in being your fiance and enjoying you, I haven't thought about that next step." I shake my head at the ridiculousness of it. "I guess we better hurry."

He nods, his hand slipping back up to rest on my bump. "Teddy's coming soon and I still want to take you away before he comes."

I still don't understand how we'll find the time, but I know I do want to be his wife. Soon. "I'll start looking for a dress."

His fingers come up to graze my cheek. "Lace?"

"Is that what you want?" I'm confused by his request.

"Yes. Like the panties from our first night that lay in my office desk."

I gasp. "Christian!"

He chuckles. "Why do you think I keep it locked? I like to be reminded of that night frequently, but they're for my eyes only. Only I know what you looked like in them... what you smelled like, what you sounded like when I slipped them off... fuck."

I give him a smirk. "Turning yourself on?"

"You turn me on. Any thought of you gets me going. But that night. God. I've had so many wet dreams reliving it in my sleep. And you just keep getting sweeter and more relaxed with me. I must have been a real good boy in a past life."

I giggle at his silliness while he nips at my already bruised neck. I know I'm going to have to keep him off my neck for awhile before the wedding, but I have no doubt he'll make up for lost time when we shack up afterward.

XxXxXx

"Carla."

Christian's growl wakes me and I just now realize I dozed off in the cabana after we ate. Waking up to the warm, salty air would be like heaven if it weren't for the angry, seething man beside me.

I see him sitting straight up, his muscles achingly contracted, while he grits through his teeth on the phone.

"I don't take nicely to anyone threatening my family."

I sit up and lean against his stiff shoulder, giving it a kiss in hopes it'll make him unclench. I don't like him so uptight and stressed.

"You don't deserve her, Carla. You are toxic and I won't have her worked up because of your misery. Stop unloading your trauma on her, you've given her enough of her own!"

I sigh and look out at the water, relieved that I have an advocate. I can't stand up to my mother and when I do, I feel guilty afterward and backtrack. I'm thankful for Christian.

"You filled her head with nothing but pain and lies this morning. You don't know me. You barely know her. You weren't protecting her, you were criticizing and devaluing her. It's obvious you don't want her happy. You'd already admitted it with her and Ray. Misery loves company, Ms. Wilks, but you won't find it here. I am still willing to pay for your therapy but only because your daughter who loves you through your venomous ways wants me to... but I will not allow you access to her until the therapist I hand pick assures me that you are competent enough to have correspondence with her without damaging your relationship further."

Damn, Christian. I'm glad I'm not on the receiving end of this conversation. It's so fucking sexy though. Christian would fight anyone and anything for me and it makes me feel so foolish thinking I let my mother get in my head. I feel like she took advantage of the fact that my hormones are in overdrive. Christian is my weak spot and she chose to strike while I was feeling open and raw from waking up with him.

"I don't have to convince Anastasia of anything, Ms. Wilks. You did a great job of pushing her away yourself. If you need to get ahold of us, you'll do it through me. You won't have access to Ana's number anymore. This conversation is over. I'll contact you with the therapists information."

His throws his phone back on the bed and I lean up, giving him a deep kiss. "Thank you. You're amazing."

His jaw softens for me and so does his body. "The sun is starting to set. Take a walk down the beach with me. I want to show my angel off."

*Christian's POV*

"I'm home!"

I look up from my place at the kitchen island, where I've been working. Ana comes in and deposits her handbag on the counter, pressing a kiss to my temple.

"You're in a good mood." I say, smiling at her.

"I am! It was a good day. I found my dress."

My smile broadens. "You have?"

Anastasia took Kate, Ethan, Gail, Mia, and Mom with her to dress shop this morning. I hadn't expected her to find anything so soon since she is trying to find something off the rack. There is no time to wait for it to be made and shipped, but trying to find a lace maternity dress off the rack is probably not the easiest thing.

"We had to go to four stores, but I found one! The girls found their bridesmaids dresses, too."

"That's great news, baby." I kiss her lips. Kate, Mia, and Gail are her bridesmaids, while Ethan is her bridesman. I wasn't the most ecstatic person when I found out that he'd be standing for her and going to help her shop, but I was good and swallowed my jealousy. I don't find it fair that he gets to see her in the dress before I do, but when I do see it, she'll be walking down the aisle to promise me forever, so I'll let him have this little part of her.

"Ethan asked what he was supposed to wear. I told him you'd let him know once you figured it out."

I grin. "I already have."

She looks surprised. "Really? What? You wearing lace too?"

Her question makes me laugh. "No, baby. You are the only one I want in lace. I'll talk to Ethan. It's a surprise." I can't tell her what I'm planning on them wearing without giving a little bit of the wedding away. When Ana told me that planning a wedding seemed too stressful for her pregnant self, I told her to leave the time and place to me. She picked the colors, the dresses, and the groom.

"A tiny hint?" She asks, sticking her lip out. "You know my dress is lace."

I give her a nod. "Okay... then the button downs will be white, my vest dark blue."

Her eyes light up. "Vest? No jacket?"

I grin. "No jacket." I know how much she loves seeing me in a button down and vest.

"That's all I need to know."

XxXxXx

My stomach is in knots as we pull up to Escala. Flynn and Ana both have said it would be a good healing experience to go back one last time, but I don't feel that way. Ana wants to see the playroom and I don't know if I can handle dealing with all of the vile memories. Escala held more destruction than anything else. I feel like I was a different person there. I don't want to go back. I don't want my sweet girl to see where I hurt and defiled women. I also don't want her to be reminded of the fucker who tried to molest her and kill me. His blood was spilled there and it'll always be tainted.

As we pull into the garage, it feels like a dream. So many times I've gone through the gate, but it feels wrong now. Nothing about it feels like home. Taylor pulls up to the first spot in the empty garage. The only other vehicle is my other Audi, telling me that Sawyer is already here. My vehicles have already been moved to the other property, making it feel even more eery.

Ana holds my hand as the three of us climb into the elevator and I pray to God this is the last time I'll have to ride up the damn thing again. When the elevator dings, the sound is familiar and I find myself walking forward automatically like I have done countless other times. The door is already open since Sawyer is moving a few legal things of mine and I find myself standing between the great room and the kitchen, somewhere close to where the Hyde fucker went down.

Taking a deep breath, I smell nothing bit clorox and cleaning materials. It doesn't even smell the same. As I look around, Ana lets go of my hand and makes her way into the kitchen, her body disappearing behind the cabinets.

My heart aches as I make my way over to her. She's kneeling on the floor, right where she was the last time we were here...only I'm not dying below her this time. I crouch down beside her and lift her chin. She's crying.

"It's over, Ana. I'm okay. I'm right here."

He lets out a watery laugh and wipes her tears. "I know. I just wanted my last memory of this spot to be empty. I wanted to remember it clean and sterile. I wanted to make sure there wasn't a part of you left here."

I grab her elbows and pull us both up to our feet. "Nope. I'm whole and with you."

She gives me a soft smile and hugs me. "For a lifetime."

"That doesn't seem long enough." Hooking an arm around her, I turn her and start heading toward the bedroom. Nothing but good memories of me and Ana there. I want a quiet moment with her alone where we slept. The Christian and Ana zone. The only part of the house that feels unruined.

I allow Ana to go ahead of me and, seeing a wall of boxes coming at us, I'm just able to pull her away in time for Sawyer to come barging through with them. Suddenly, he comes to a halt, realizing we're here. The top box sways and before I can reach for it, it goes stumbling, crashing to the floor upside down. The manilla folders inside of it slip out and Ana squats down in a hurry to help.

My blood runs cold.

These are my files from my vault. The ones containing my envelopes for each of my contracts.

"Anastasia! No! Let me help!" I duck down, but it's too late. She has a fistful of pictures in one hand, a contract in the other. The picture on top shows one of my submissives, Tegan, bound and laid open in a sex swing.

"Anastasia..." My voice is gentle.

She continues through a few of the pictures before she concentrates on the contract. She leaves the pictures on the floor and flips through the contract, which has marks and handwriting all over it; our likes and dislikes, hard limits and soft. Her measurements, preferences on clothes, and her weekly allowance amount.

I remember to breathe. "Ana...look at me."

"You look at these?" She turns toward me, holding up the pictures. You take these so you can look at them later?"

Her eyes fall back down on the pictures and I try to pull them away, but she turns away from me. The last one I see is of Tegan bent over the tantra chair, welts on her red backside. I close my eyes.

"Ana. Those are private. They are to stay in the vault." It isn't fair to Tegan to have someone staring at her in such a compromising position. Not when I swore no one would see them.

She grits her teeth. "Your eyes only, right? When was the last time you saw these?"

Finally, she lets me pull them out of her grasp and I put them all back in the manilla folder with the contract.

"I haven't looked at these since I took them. I only took them as collateral for the NDA. It guarantees they don't break it. Please, just go have a seat in the bedroom and let me clean this up. You don't need to see anymore. You don't need to do this to yourself."

She's shaking and I can see she's doing her best to keep her cool in front of Sawyer who is trying to clean up without misplacing any more of what's in the folders. Nodding, she stands and leaves me to it. I make quick work with it, trying to keep my hands from shaking.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Grey." Sawyer is beating himself up. The old Christian would have gone thermonuclear on his ass and probably fired him.

"You're forgiven, Sawyer. I appreciate you trying to make quick work of it. I should have announced we were here." I don't want any secrets between Ana and me and it's probably best that she find out about these now at Escala than finding out later.

Once I right the box and put the lid on it, I leave him to it and continue into the bedroom where Ana is sitting on the edge of the bed.

"You okay?" I kneel down in front of her, resting my forearms on her thighs. I can see she's using all of her energy to try to keep herself calm, but her lip is quivering, her body shaking.

"You like that stuff."

"I did. Yes."

"Do you still look at it? Think about it?"

"No. I only think of you."

She shakes her head, her eyes finally finding mine. "Don't tell me what I want to hear."

I take her hands in mine. "I'm not. I'm telling you the truth. After I took each picture they would go into the vault and stay there. I never looked at them again. Seeing them today, I'm ashamed of myself. I shouldn't have hurt her that badly. I have no urge for that now."

"Why didn't you tell me you kept a picture log?"

I shrug. "It never occurred to me. I never thought about them being in the vault, but I'm honestly glad you saw it because if something did happen to me and you found them with no explanation... it would be devastating for you."

Her breath is shuddering and my heart aches for her. She's dealt with so much in regard to my past. "I can only imagine how much it hurts right now, angel. I'm sorry. I wish I could erase my past." I sit up and pull her to me, holding her tight.

Finally, she starts to sob. I'm relieved that she isn't continuing to stress her body out by trying to keep it all inside.

"I've got you. I'm so sorry. Please, don't hate me. I'm right here. You're the only one I want. The only thing I need."

"I cant do that, Christian. I can't. I can't put myself in those positions."

"Shhh, I know. I don't want to put you in those positions." I rock her back and forth, holding her as tight as I can. When she finally begins to relax against me, I kiss her temple. "Do you hate me?"

"No. I love you. So much, Christian. That's why it hurts. Seeing what you saw. What turned you on. They gave you parts of them that I can't give you. Knowing they had you and that they were the center of your world in that moment..." She shivers.

"No. They never had me. You have me. They just placated me until I figured my shit out. Until you, I was the center of my world. You've changed that for me. I'd do anything for you." I rub her back up and down, trying to warm her up. Her body has gone cold. "I love you so much. I can't wait to be your husband."

"Mine."

Her response makes me laugh.

"Look who's possessive now." I tease, pulling back enough to kiss her. I hand her a tissue from the bed side table. "I think it's time for us to go and leave this all behind... Leave the hurt behind."

She frowns. "I haven't seen the room, yet."

"Haven't you been through enough pain today, Ana? Why put yourself through more?" I push her hair out of her face.

"I just need to see it, Christian." Although I don't understand it, I allow it. If she needs this, then I'll be there. I just hope it doesn't make her run.

*Ana's POV*

I stare at the large wooden door outside of the room he calls the playroom and I find my heart beating hard against my ribcage. Christian had spent so much time and energy in this room and I feel the need to be there.

Using the large gold key, he unlocks it. "Are you really sure this is what you want?"

I nod. "Yes."

I watch him swallow before pushing the door open and he takes a step back to let me in. Before I even move, the smell of leather, wood, and citrus smacks me in the face and I find myself already tearing up because it smells similar to his library/billiards room downstairs. I don't want the smell to remind me of this.

Taking a deep, cleansing breath, I force myself to take a few steps into the dark room. I can see that the walls are red from the faint light coming from the hallway, but I had already figured that out from the pictures.

The click of a light sounds and the room is cast in a soft warm glow from the ceiling. I startle and still halfway into a step. The room is huge. Red everywhere with black accents and brown leather instruments hanging on the wall like art. Chains, riding crops, floggers, gags, and other things line the room and fill the beautiful pieces of carved wooden furniture around the room. Each piece of furniture houses drawers and shelves and I find myself curious, pulling open the drawer closest to me. Looking down, I see dozens of pins with different color gems and lengths, colors, and sizes.

I look up and over to the door, where Christian is still standing. He hasn't set foot into the room, yet. I cock an eyebrow in question.

"Nipple clamps."

My eyes widen and I shut the drawer. I open the next one and there are butt plugs. Next one, dilators. I move to the next set and find bullets.

"Better." I comment, looking over at him. He looks entertained. I continue on, seeing that dildos and vibrators are in the next drawer, and the bottom some sort of balls.

"Kegal balls."

I nod. "Those I've heard of. I didn't know it was a sex thing though." When I look back at him, he's still staring from the door.

"What is it, Christian?"

He licks his lips and shrugs.

I suddenly feel raw and I cross my arms to try to ease the ache in my chest.

"No, Anastasia. Don't close up on me." He tone is firm and steady.

"Then talk to me. Is me being in here ruining it for you?" I frown at the thought.

He lets out a laugh. "Not in the slightest."

"...So... You like seeing me in here?" My arms fall away from my chest.

He chews his lip while he regards me. I give him time to think. "Conflicted."

"Oh?" How?

"I don't want this lifestyle anymore, but seeing you in here is satisfying for some reason. It's erotic, even though I don't want everything that goes into it. I don't know how to feel."

I give him a smile. I know I'm fucking crazy, but I'm glad that he gets satisfaction with me here. I want him to be able to see me in every part of his life.

I take a few steps toward him. "Does that mean you would have taken me as a submissive back-"

"In a heartbeat." He shakes his head, realizing how quickly he answered. "I'm sorry."

"I'm not." I relax my body into him and his arms wrap around me. "I like that I can compete against the others. That my face and body would still have your attention even back then."

"You would have been at the top of my list, Anastasia. And I would have demanded an extension on the contract." I can feel his erection pushing against my lower belly and when I quirk an eyebrow at him, he actually colors. He's embarrassed that he's still finding arousal in this room, but I knew he would. I might not be able to deal with the pain, but I can handle some of the binding and pleasure.

"Show me."

He's startled and confused. "What?"

"How you are in here. Not the hurt... but the other stuff. I trust you. I want to see how you play...and I want to be the last one you have in here. Are you able to give me that?"

"Ana." He breathes out my name and I give him a smile.

"Please?"

I'm being lifted and moved back into the room before I can blink. The sound of the door slamming startles me along the way. When we hit the bed, Christian slows and lays me down carefully against the red silk sheets of the giant bed.

"You are a siren, Anastasia. I don't deserve you. Not one second of you. I can't believe you're mine." Hovering over me, he kisses me deeply, his tongue tasting and lapping at mine. I moan into his mouth when his hand grips and kneads my right breast. I arch my back into him, but he pulls away.

"Tell me no and I'll stop. At any time, angel. I mean it." He's panting.

I nod. "I understand."

"I'm going to bind you, but I won't take away your sight. I want to see you. I need to see your eyes."

My toes curl in my shoes. "Yes."

He takes his time undressing me, throwing everything in a pile on the floor before he does the same to himself.

"I've never been completely naked in this room, Ana. Only for you."

I love that he's going out of his way to show me that I'm different... more important. I mean more to him than the others.

I watch him wander around the room, grabbing rope, a bar, and he pulls open the drawer with the vibrators making me eyes widen. As he makes his way over, he shows me that it's in a package. "Brand new, Ana."

I nod.

"Still with me?"

"Yes."

He climbs up the bed beside me with some of the rope. "Clasp your hands together...good girl." I hold them out in front of me and watch him wrap the red silk rope around them, knotting them at the end. I try to move my wrists, but can't. It makes Christian smirk. He grabs the tail end of the rope and pulls it, forcing my wrists above my head. I crane my head up and see him tying it to a metal loop on the headboard.

Once he's finished, his hands run down the length of my arms, giving me goosebumps. My shiver makes my nipples harden. "Fuck, you're incredible."

Moving down my body, he grabs my ankles and pulls, forcing my arms to straighten and my chest to bow. He runs his palms up and down my legs a few times. "I can't believe this is happening, Anastasia. I can't believe you're mine."

He picks up the metal bar and shows it to me. "This is a spreader bar. I'm going to cuff your ankles and spread your legs so I have all the access I want. There will be no hiding from me."

He's so fucking sexy. I shimmy on the bed.

The right side of his mouth pulls up into a smirk. "Dancing for me already, angel? This is going to be fun."

I wait as patiently as I can while he cuffs my ankles.

"Okay, Ms. Steele?" He asks, but is looking up.

"Yes." I look up, too, trying to see what he's looking at.

Reaching up high, he yanks on a chain and then when he has it at the height he wants it, he uses his wrist to snap it forward, locking it in place. The sound of the chain is both terrifying and exhilarating. Grabbing the bar, I hear a click and my feet spread.

"Damn."

He grins at my comment. "You'll be saying a lot more than that in a few minutes."

I whimper at the thought and squeeze my eyes shut. Hurry up!

When my feet begin to raise, though, my eyes fly open. Christian has the center of the bar in his left hand, the chain above us in his right. He lifts my legs until the clasp in the center reaches the bottom rung of the chain, where he attaches it. My legs and backside are suspended, my weight going onto the small of my back. He quickly grabs a pillow and lifts me a little more so he can place the pillow against the small of my back.

"Tell me if you're comfortable."

I nod. The softness of the pillow helped with the ache in my lower back from the extra weight from the baby.

"I need to hear it."

"Yes, Christian."

"Good girl...God you look incredible. So open and so wet for me." His mouth comes in contact with my center and I try to grind into him, move towards him, but I'm completely incompacitated. He really does have all the control.

He hums. "Looks like you'll have to absorb the pleasure I give you. Enjoy it, baby. Moan, scream, cry if it feels that good and you need to. Let me hear you."

*Christian's POV*

"Christian...oh, Christian...yes...yes...oh yeeessssss..." I have the vibrator working her g-spot over and over and Ana is moaning, chanting, and sobbing out for me. Her face is pink from the rush of multiple orgasms I've already given her, her mascera staining her pretty cheeks from the intensity of her orgasms. Her body is pink and bruised from a mix of endless love bites and the rub of my facial hair against her soft body. Her center is dripping onto the bed and I'm throbbing to fuck her but I can't stop pleasuring her. I don't want the scene to end. Her legs jolt and shake every time the vibrator hits her sweet spot inside of her and by the sound her sweet cunt is making I can tell she's close. Her body is sucking on the vibrator, trying to pull it in, but I don't let it. I want the deepest part of her.

"Christian, please. Please, Christian..."

"Almost there. Your body is almost there. Just a few more turns..." Her body has never recieved pleasure like this and she's struggling through parts of it, but she hasn't told me to stop...so I continue.

Her body begins to tense and she begins to detonate, but I keep moving the vibrator over her bundle of nerves to keep her going. She sobs out and there's a gush like a damn waterfall the runs over my hand.

"Fuck, Ana! Fuuckkk." I growl out as she unmans me. "God, baby." I spasm and come onto the sheet between her legs.

"What happened?" She looks surprised as she pants and shudders in front of me from the intensity of her last one.

I let out a light laugh. "You came hard, baby... like a rain shower. Fuck. That's incredible. You made me come just watching." I pant. "That's never happened. God, the control you have over me..." I shake my head, trying to concentrate. I need buried in her. "Ready for my cock now?"

XxXxXx

"That was the most intense moment of my life."

I grin at her comment, kissing her forehead while we lay in the bed afterward. She's no longer tied up, but neither of us have the energy to move.

"You enjoyed it?"

"You rocked my world, Mr. Grey. We're taking that stuff home with us."

I laugh. "I'll buy us our own spreader bar and rope, angel."

"Fine, but I'm going shopping in that vibrator drawer before we leave." She giggles.

"Deal." Whatever she wants.

A/N: I hope the Carla talk and the Escala part lived up to all of your expectations. I've been fretting over it for days! Teaser? Just ask!