Chapter Twenty

20.1

Adam lifted himself up and looked at the dark shadows surrounding him. There was such a painful feeling inside of him but as he looked out into the minimal light of the place he didn't recognize – all he could see was what appeared like a completely empty version of a domed room with long walls and windows that didn't show anything outside. Just darkness. He looked ahead of him and blinked, hands? He had hands?

"Where am I?" he asked feeling very weak as he stood up and realized there was nobody there. He hadn't felt alone but now that he looked, he couldn't see anyone. "Belle," he said as he thought back on how he had begged for her to stop the spell and for him to do anything to save her. Was this the entry to hell? He doubted he'd be able to reach heaven with the life he had lived.

"She's okay," Adam could hear a voice within his head tell him. He took deep breaths to calm himself.

"Can I trust you?" he asked as the light started to show a mist of gray colors. "Am I dead?"

"Your family has killed many who live within the dead but I don't see blood on your hands or on your mind," the voice said and Adam could see a shadowy figure through the mist. He felt a tug on him and shadows surround him and he felt a lot of fear as he started shaking. He opened his eyes as if waking up but remained in the same place. "I have kept your mind here with me…in this place the body is….have you heard that a soul can remain outside of the body. We have returned the minimum of your mentality to the living realm, let's see if you follow it."

Adam froze. They had done what? He would definitely need help to figure this out but he had to remain calm. Maybe he wasn't as intelligent as Belle but he could do his best and hope that he was at least not of terrible intellect. "So…Belle…thinks that -"

"You're in shock, and you are in shock but let's say it's as if you're having a nightmare," the voice said and Adam felt nervous about that. He didn't know what that meant but hopefully, however his body was, it would be safe whilst he figured out how he could get back to it. He slowed his breathing.

"I would like to go back there," he said as he tried to look around to see if there was a way he could get a better look at his companion. "You tell me that there is no blood on my hands or on my mind. Does that mean that you know about the black rose?" he asked before looking down. "If you know that then you know I can't become a man again."

"And yet she deliberately attempted to find ways to bring you back without that decision being made," the other being replied and Adam nodded. "You are trying to cheat. If you were intelligent, strong, brave, true, then you would have no fear."

Adam closed his eyes and bowed his head. "I know that I'm not those things. I still want to choose to be human and to try to show those things. Kindness, warmth, bravery. I care about what happens to my wife and child foremost but then also my friends."

"So there is not an equal love amongst all of you?" the being asked and Adam looked down. He hated that but he had to admit that Belle and Juliet were his highest priorities. People would understand that, wouldn't they? It's not as if he was hurting anyone. He nodded.

"Whatever happens in my life, I just want for my wife and daughter to be happy and healthy and safe," he said before imagining people separating him from them because of the way he looked. He would have to deal with that. He wasn't a murderer and he wasn't going to let them turn him into such an individual.

"Would you be a guard dog?" the voice mocked him and Adam closed his eyes and nodded.

"If you are referring to my being an animal, then yes, even as an animal I would want to be with Belle. I would want to make sure that she is not harmed." Adam wrapped an arm around himself. He felt that it was colder, more conspicuous and at the same time he was only here with a shadow to who he could not advance further.

"Without you becoming a murderer your spell cannot be broken," the being spoke and Adam nodded. "You feel that you can offer your princesses protection in the form of a monster?" they asked and Adam laughed weakly before nodding.

"I will do so every day if that is what is needed from me," he replied. "My heart belongs with Belle and Juliet no matter what happens to me. Belle doesn't see me as a monster. As long as my wife sees me as she does, I should have trust In knowing I'm not a monster."

"So, you have love, you have strength. However, you are not of equal intelligence, are you?" the being continued and Adam stared in that direction. No. He was very unintelligent in comparison to Belle. As much love as he had, as much physical strength and the desire to protect and the inner heroism that he surpassed his brothers in, he wasn't sure of his intellect.

"I have never pretended to be her match in intellect," Adam said as he started to feel his self-doubt surround him and his eyes widened as he started to see pieces of the real world in the mist and the fur on his arm. Before he had been sure of who he was but this insecurity was making him turn into the beast. "I don't need to be any more intelligent than I am as long as I am trying to learn," Adam said as he found things to become more stable for him. "I want to learn. I want to improve myself but in the ways I can't, I want to rely on those who are more intelligent than me. I will happily protect Belle until and even after my last breath no matter what body and I will rely on her intellect."

"Your father and brothers would never rely on a woman's intellect," the shadow said and Adam laughed weakly.

"I am nothing like my brothers and my father," he admitted to himself. "I'm not that arrogant to not listen to good advice and to not trust my wife. You're right. I'm not that intelligent but I'm learning and I trust Belle and I would do anything for her."

"You are the savior of your family, Adam," the being said and Adam laughed as he reflected on that.

"That doesn't matter. I know who is important and it's Belle and I know that I'm asking too much but I want to be with her. I'll spend the rest of my life as the beast but I want to be with Belle." Adam found the being to touch him and his eyes widened, they didn't have a face or any features whatsoever, just a being made of clouds but as he found the being to grab his wrist, he felt intense pain.

"You won't be the beast for the rest of your life," they promised and Adam felt a stabbing through him. He looked at the white rose and his eyes widened as he saw that half of the petals reflected his beast form and half of the petals his prince form. "Now you must learn how to control your form. You must learn when you need to fight and when you need to submit and surrender. Besides," the figure said and Adam could sweat that even on this feature-less face, there was a grin. "True intellect is knowing when to rely on others who know things that we do not know."

Adam nodded but as the rose seemed to bloom more, he found himself stumble and fall down. Once again he entered the black darkness.

20.2

Adam lifted his head from the pillow and stared at his hand. Human. He was human right now? He looked up to where food had been placed for him and then covered to keep it warm. He was in their bedroom and his eyes widened as he looked towards where the black rose had been and his breath caught as he noticed it had become metallic. What did that mean? Why did roses come in so many colors anyway? Adam tried to steady his breathing and put a hand up to his forehead. His hair was a mess and he felt dehydrated.

He reached for a comb before quickly fixing his hair and kept it loose. He grabbed a comfortable but loose shirt. He could transform at any moment. He wasn't trusting to the idea that he would never become the beast again. He took deep breaths to steady himself before going to the door to the room.

As he opened it, he was surprised to see Lumiere there but the older man looked in the same amount of shock. Something had happened whilst he had been caught in that in-between world. "Belle?" Adam asked as he looked at his friend, "Where is she?"

"Should you be out of bed?" Lumiere asked as he stared at him. "And human? Adam? Should you be human?"

"I'm not sure…I don't know…" Adam replied as he felt himself losing consciousness a little. "I just want to talk with her."

"She is having dinner with her father," Lumiere said and Adam laughed weakly. He was smiling but in a much more composed manner than he had just been smiling and laughing in. It was as if he had finally snapped out of whatever condition he had. Still, did that mean that the condition could return?

"I'll join them," Adam smiled. He put a hand to his heart. Belle had changed him. He didn't want to imagine where he would be were it not for her. Belle had saved him.

20.3

"Isn't Adam eating with us? Even if he does look like he did before, I would expect for him to -" Maurice said and Belle took a slow breath in. She closed her eyes before trying to decide how to explain Adam's condition. She didn't want her father to look down on him again. Adam needed love and support especially after what he had gone through.

"Ye-yes," said an unsteady voice and Belle looked up, wide eyed as she saw Adam standing there in human form. He looked shaky but his expression was more of his own. Belle immediately went over to him and studied him. He looked weak, barely able to stand, but his face was more…intact.

"Adam," she said as she saw him almost fall and then noticed Lumiere reach to catch him. She grabbed his arm and put it around her shoulder. "Should you be out of bed? How are you feeling? Are you okay?"

"I just returned, I'm sorry I got stuck there," he whispered to her. Maurice was standing to study the situation and Adam hated that he had to rely on Belle for support. "Hi, I would bow to you," Adam said as he finally got to his seat and sat, Belle crouched down beside him and placed her hand on his upper arm. He had a new shard of glass in his arm, one that right now was showing his reflection as the beast. She kissed his cheek.

"If you really don't feel well then maybe rest is the best option," Maurice commented and Adam shook his head. He saw Belle move so that she was sitting next to him and away from her father. If he knew that she was going to do that, he would have insisted on her taking the seat in the middle.

"I'm fine…now," Adam whispered as Belle found herself to reach up and feel for his temperature. He was slightly hot but not a dangerous amount.

"If you're not fine," Belle whispered to him. "Tell me, I'll help you back to the bed. You need your rest."

"I'll be fine," Adam repeated and nodded to her. "I'll talk about it later," he tried to promise her. Belle placed a hand on his wrist as he was brought food. She stared at it pleading for him to eat it. However, his eyes widened and he pushed the chair back.

"Adam?" she asked as she gently let her fingers push his hair back. She saw the brown fur there and saw his eyes go between his arm with the rose in it and Maurice, he kept looking between the two of us. "Stay," she told him. "Please, Papa already knows, if he can't…"

She saw Adam to bow his head as the horns and fur appeared and he got larger. She held him as he experienced the change and looked at his arm where the reflection on the glass shard changed to the human version of himself. Belle stood and wrapped her arms protectively around him. She looked at her father firmly, as if challenging him to say something to her husband.

"I wouldn't have joined you in this form," he told Maurice after he was able to lift his head. He felt sick but he was able to hold it. "I know that…the things which I've done in the past are unforgiveable but I do hope one day to be forgiven for them."

Belle wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "I'm so relieved that you're back," she sobbed. "Adam has some…limitations in this form," she said as she kissed his mouth and pressed her forehead against his before sitting down next to him. "Papa, I hope that you can understand that and extend the love you have for me to him as well."

"I'll try," Maurice said as he seemed to avoid looking at his son-in-law.

Belle saw Adam timidly reach out with his paw to grab some of the food by hand and she leaned her head against his arm. "Will you tell me what happened? How you're back with your mind intact?" she asked, "or more -"

"Turns out that I am intelligent after all," he told her in a whisper. "I might not be as intelligent as others but I was able to beat it because I'm strong, I'm intelligent, and I love you." Belle laughed and kissed his arm.

"I already knew all of that," she said before looking up at him. "Thank you. Thank you for returning to us."

End of Chapter Twenty

Thank you for reading

Thank you to KathyMesser for reviewing Chapter Nineteen