The headlines that week were memorable.
Condiment King Squeezes the Penguin!
Poison Ivy Pinched by Polka Dot Man!
Catwoman Stopped by Local Kite Enthusiast!
Batman, the world's greatest detective, wasn't quite sure what to do. On the face of it, someone was manipulating the most incompetent criminals in Gotham, in order to jail the worst criminals in town.
With complex, open-ended cases like this one, Batman found it helpful to make a list of all the possibilities, no matter how unlikely.
It could be a mere coincidence that so many villains were arrested, so close together. Maybe two of the arrests were a coincidence in timing, and the third one was the work of an opportunist or a copycat criminal.
More likely, Batman thought, all the crimes were planned by the same person. But why? Was it someone with a grudge against Penguin, Poison Ivy or Catwoman? Perhaps it was someone with a grudge against only one of them, and they had captured the others as a bluff, to disguise their true target.
Perhaps the entire thing was a distraction to keep the police and media attention off of a different crime or event. Perhaps there was a new villain in town, trying to take out the competition, or one of the old villains was trying out new tactics.
Batman made an exhaustive list of all the possible explanations. For each one, he came up with a sub-list of likely suspects and motives, along with notes on what would have to be done in order to prove or disprove guilt.
Batman reviewed his list a couple times, before deciding to visit the spa where Polka Dot Man had stopped Poison Ivy. Since that was the most recent crime scene, it was the one most likely to still have clues. He was working on an email to Commissioner Gordon, who could answer his minor questions, when the Batphone buzzed.
"Batman here," Batman said.
"Just checking to see if you've left yet," said the voice of Batman's trusty butler, Alfred.
"I'll be leaving soon. Why?"
"There's been an update on the case, sir," Alfred said. "You'll probably want to check the news before you leave."
"Has Ra's Al-Gul made an appearance?" Batman asked. Ra's was at the top of Batman's suspect list, but his sources indicated that Ra's had been in India all month long.
"Not to my knowledge," Alfred said.
Batman booted up his news feed, expecting to see a story about Sid the Squid two-timing Two-Face. What he got was something else entirely.
Mob War! Rupert Thorne, Franco Bertinelli and Carmine Falcone all found dead!
The article attached the headline had clearly been rushed, with most of the content being biographies of the victims, all copy/pasted from other sources. No mention was made of who found the bodies or where. The only useful information, towards the bottom of the article, said that the Ventriloquist had been taken in for questioning.
Batman shook his head. At least my suspect list has gotten shorter... he thought.
The Riddler was unhappy, when he saw the news on TV.
"Murdered? Murdered? That wasn't in the plan!" he shouted. "You've messed everything up, you fool!"
That's the downside of outsourcing your dirty work to other criminals, Riddler thought. Sometimes they go rogue. Why didn't he follow my instructions, like a good little puppet?
"This is why I prefer crossword puzzles to people," the Riddler said. "They're much easier."
The worst part was that Riddler didn't have a solid alibi. He tried to have one. He had scheduled a blind date at the movie theater on the opposite side of town, at the same time as the mob boss meeting. Unfortunately, his date had never shown up. No doubt she was one of the many women who lost all interest in romance, upon learning her blind date had spent almost a year in Arkham Asylum.
The Riddler cursed the infamous "Harley Quinn" law, which mandated he had to list his time in Arkham on all his public profiles. It was like the politicians didn't want him to have a love life!
"Don't they know that romance is the ultimate puzzle?" Riddler asked.