69

"But do we? I could die tomorrow, you know," I tell her, and her hold on me tightens. "I could get in a car accident or have a heart attack at my desk, and I'd be gone"—I snap my fingers—"Just like that."

"We'll talk to the kids, and they can always start the application process early. When they're of age and they make their decisions, we'll support their choices either way." She kisses me and pulls away. "Then we'll discuss our future. If you change your mind about being changed, I'll support you."

"Bella—"

"Shh. We need to talk to them before we finish this conversation."

I sigh. I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. Bella senses this and stands.

"Take off your shirt and lay down," she instructs, reaching over and turning the electric heating blanket on high.

We added it to the bed the first night we shared because she was worried I'd catch pneumonia being pressed up against her cold body for hours on end. Despite the cold, I'm not willing to sleep without her, so it's a compromise that works for both of us.

I don't even have it in me to fight her. Pulling my shirt over my head, I lay down while she pops into the bathroom and returns with a bottle of lotion.

She climbs over and straddles my body. "It's going to be cold," she warns. "I'm sorry."

"Don't care," I mumble into my crossed arms.

I don't even flinch when her icy fingers find every knot and tight muscle in my shoulders.

"You're so tense." Her lips replace her hands, and I all but melt into the mattress, growing hard because I'll never get enough of her. I'll always want her in every capacity.

"Hey, you guys … Whoa!" Alice laughs and claps her hands over her eyes. "It's called a lock, for Christ's sake, but at least, close the door before you get freaky. My eyes."

Bella doesn't move. Instead, she sits up, anchoring herself with her hands on my back, and I ask Alice what she needs.

"I was just coming to tell you that Angela passed out. I'm going to bed, but I was wondering if Bella could make sure I'm up by seven. Jasper is coming over, and we're going for a run, but you know how I am in the mornings"

Bella laughs and tells her she'll try to wake her up. "Can you shut the door?"

Alice makes a big show of pointing to the doorknob. "You know there's a lock on here too. Very convenient if you don't want to scar your poor, unsuspecting kids for life."

"Goodnight, Ali," Bella chokes out.

As soon as the door is shut, she tells me to turn over on my back.

Once she's back on top of me, she hums in appreciation. "You are a very beautiful man."

I scoff. "What every male wants to hear. That they're beautiful."

Bella just laughs and puts my hands above my head before latching onto my pulse point. "Take the compliment," she whispers against my skin and whips her shirt off, throwing it behind her.

I'm breathless and so very hard right now. I know she can feel it. I take her left breast in my hand and let my thumb circle her nipple, making her moan.

"You are a very handsome woman," I say as seriously as I can, and she swats me in the chest with a little too much force. "Ooomph. Ow."

"It's nothing you don't deserve, jerk."

I take the chance and grab her granite hips, pulling her down on me.

"In all seriousness, you are very, very sexy."

Bella moans. "Likewise."

"Kiss me."

"But I like it up here." She giggles, shaking her head.

And then she starts to move at an excruciatingly slow pace. I haven't dry humped with a girl since high school.

I tell Bella so, and she laughs.

"You'll be my first everything." She leans down, and our chests brush together.

I'm going to blow my load.

"I'm sure you'll be a patient teacher. I promise to be a good pupil."

"Bella, do you have naughty schoolgirl fantasies?"

She kisses me instead of answering my question. That's okay with me. There are plenty of other things we can do to occupy our time. Like the kissing and rubbing.

"I can't tell you how happy you make me," I admit in the throes of passion.

"You are everything to me, Edward. You and the girls have become my whole world."

"Don't mention the girls right now," I grunt.

Bella lets her lust take over, and I let her use me. She's cautious and holding back but so curious when it comes to finding what works for us.

"Edward." She gasps and her hands cover mine, squeezing her breasts. "You're so warm. I'm sorry I'm so cold."

"You're perfect, Bella. I love you."

When she comes undone, it's a thing of beauty. The fact that I get to be the first and only man to give her that goes straight to my head. I get mine too, but who cares when they've got a sexy vampire who's going to love them forever?

She kisses me senseless as she comes down from her high.

"One day, we'll be the same temperature, and I'll be strong enough that you won't have to worry about holding back," I tell her when I've finally caught my breath.