80

"No."

"But it's pretty," Bella whines playfully as she runs her hand along the velvet headboard.

The tacky, pink, velvet headboard.

"No, kitten. Not happening."

She pouts, and I find great interest in a pair of horrible white oak nightstands. When my ex did what she did, we purged the house of anything that reminded us of her. I wasn't expecting to ever share my bedroom with another woman again, so I only have one nightstand in my room at the moment. We plan on fixing that today, but not with this. Just no.

"I don't know. I like these. They have a lot of storage space."

I'm lying. The nightstands that go along with the pink bed frame are just as ugly. Bella huffs and moves on to the next bedroom set. I follow her, glad to have dodged that bullet. Age does not equal good taste. At least with my vampire, that is.

"Oooh. Sturdy. Not too feminine, not too masculine. What do you think?"

"Aren't adjustable beds for old people and hospitals?"

Bella laughs and throws her arms around my neck and pulls me down so she can whisper in my ear. "Think of all the positions we could try."

"We'll take this one!" I call to the saleslady walking the floor.

We argue over who's going to pay. Bella wins when she pinches my ass hard enough to leave a bruise. She pays almost double to have it delivered today.

When we arrive home, we find the kids in what looks like a heated game of Monopoly in the dining room. Oh, Lord.

"You knew I was going for Park Place, Nostradamus!" Alice growls at her sister's boyfriend.

"Hey, now." Jasper laughs. "Simmer down, darlin'. No need for name callin'."

Ben leans back in his chair and gives her a cocky grin. "Isn't that the point of this game?"

"Whatever, dick."

She doesn't even see it coming when all the soda in front of her leaves the glass and splashes her right in the face. Everyone bursts out laughing while Alice squeals and runs upstairs. Jasper's going to be in the doghouse for sure.

Bella makes it a big deal that we dismantle and remove the old bedroom furniture at my pace. "It means more this way," she says and hands me a manual screwdriver. "Think of how accomplished you'll feel when they bring in the new stuff."

"Are you going to make me feel accomplished again when we put all that shit together?"

Bella laughs. "Nope, you were distracted when I asked for assembly upon delivery." She pecks my lips. "I'd eat lots of protein at dinner because you're going to need your stamina tonight."

"Can't wait."

It takes forever and is incident-free for the most part. I get a really bad splinter in my palm that sets Jasper on edge when Bella removes it. He's understanding when Bella hits him with her shield. It was reflexive, and she didn't mean it. I still find it entertaining, watching him cry like a bitch.

Ben mentions that he never wants to be on Bella's bad side and insists that they all go to Cora's for a while so Jasper can calm down.

I'm whispering dirty things in my girl's ear when the furniture arrives. Bella speaks with the two vampires, and they put everything together wickedly fast while I flip through the manual. It's complex, but she's right. The idea of upgrading and getting the heated mattress pads was pure genius.

This is going to be fun. The vamps leave, and Bella heads to the kitchen.

"What are you doing?" I ask, and she grins.

"Making you dinner so I can take you upstairs and wear you out."