Author's Note: It is I!

I have returned for a new chapter...five seconds later :-P

And now, without further ado, Cat decides to get...pranky ;-D

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Victorious, the zany plots or the characters. If I did, Cat would play pranks every episode and then giggle adorably about it.

#3

"Cat, I don't know about this…"

It was the third day of fulfilling Cat's Christmas Wish List. The sun had already set, darkness enshrouding the town. Robbie and Cat were dressed in matching black pajellyhoochies, carrying a huge barrel of red paint between them.

Robbie had never been great at playing pranks on other people. But when he was with Cat, he got dragged into doing the nuttiest things.

For a Jewish kid with low self-esteem, it was a morbidly cheap thrill.

He still felt like they were crossing a huge line that could get them both thrown in jail.

"Cat, wait a second!"

Cat sighed and stopped walking. "Robbie, we've been over this. It's simple: we'll go to her garage, splash it with a little paint and then book it."

"This is wazzed off!" Robbie hissed. "And here's why: it's a crime, it's morally wrong, and most importantly, it's freezing out here!"

"I can't believe you don't wanna help me get revenge on Ms. Twill! And after what she did to you two years ago!"

Robbie laid down the barrel of paint and stared quizzically at his best friend. "What are you talking about?"

Cat fixed Robbie with her best 'duh!' expression before answering. "She told you to order the caviar when we went to Maestros."

"So?"

"Ms. Twill also told you that the caviar only cost $5."

"That bushpea!" Robbie fumed.

"So are you in?"

"You bet your cute dimples I'm in!"

Cat blushed just a little at Robbie's compliment before she was all business again. "Let's get our brushes and paint a big fat 'F' on her garage."

As they got to work with spreading red paint over the plastic tray they'd brought along, Robbie couldn't help saying, "You do realise that the 'F' Ms. Twill gave you was deserving, right? Your project was about an African safari and you made a purple tiger costume! They don't exist!"

"Robbie!"

"Sorry! It's true though."

"Whatever. Ms. Twill said my costume was 'inaccurate'! It was mean and she ruined my good vibes. Now, I'm gonna ruin her most prized possession: this garage!"

Robbie's tongue poked out his mouth while he painted neat lines of red on the wooden garage door. "Why is Ms. Twill so crazy about her garage anyway? She brings it up every time she sees my parents in the grocery store."

In comparison, Cat's brushstrokes were much sloppier the more engrossed she got with her story. "It was a prize for winning a radio contest on who could name all the Fat Biscuit songs which topped the Platinum Chart."

"Wow, that is really sad."

"Right? Fat Biscuit only had one hit single, a monkey could have won. There — all done!"

Cat and Robbie stepped back to admire their handiwork. They painted a gigantic red 'F' across 's garage. Despite the pettiness of the act, Robbie had to admit that his and Cat's artistic skills were impressive.

"It actually looks pretty good." He couldn't remember a time before this when he'd felt more liberated and energized.

"I know! Maybe after this, we could paint a tiger on her environmentally-friendly Prius—"

Robbie was momentarily blinded by a series of flood lights which suddenly shone down on both him and Cat. They came from inside Ms. Twill's house and she stalked towards them in a towering rage.

"What the chizz is going on out here? What are you two doing at my house-"

The middle-aged woman stopped short and gaped in horror at how her property had been defaced. "What have you done to my beautiful garage, you villains?!"

"We gave it a much-needed facelift," Cat countered with an evil smile on her face. "Maybe next time you'll think twice before being such a grunchy teacher who listens to Fat Biscuit."

Ms. Twill emitted a bloodcurdling scream that wouldn't have sounded out of place in The Scissoring.

"Wait, how come she has a baseball bat—"

Robbie barely finished his sentence when Ms. Twill hit him in the crown jewels.

"Oh bushpeas!" Cat yelled out in horror.

"MY. CHRISTMAS. BALLS!"

Robbie lay writhing in agony in Ms. Twill's driveway while she continued whaling on him with an aluminium bat. Cat charged Ms. Twill from behind and pushed her into a nearby shrub. Then she grabbed Robbie's hand and dragged him away just as Ms. Twill got up with an assortment of twigs and leaves in her hair and gave chase.

"Oh my God, is she still behind us?!" Robbie yelled out just as a multitude of dogs began howling and more of the neighbours woke up.

"Yip, and she's pretty wazzed off!" Cat picked up some pebbles to slow Ms. Twill down.

"I can't go any further – I'm too weak. Don't be a hero, Cat — save yourself."

"No Jewish friends get left behind!"

With that, Cat let go of Robbie's hand and turned around briefly just so she could do an outstanding 'clothes-line' manoeuvre on Ms. Twill, sending the older woman sliding onto her back.

That gave them enough time to book it they ran (or in Robbie's case, waddle like a penguin from Unhappy Pete) for their lives.

Author's Note: Ms. Twill is an original character which featured in my Victorious crack-fic 'If It's Good Enough For Harley'. She is Cat's Costume Design Teacher :-)

'Unhappy Pete' is a parody of 'Happy Feet'. I'll see myself out.

So this chapter didn't have anything to do with Christmas, unless Cat was trying to land herself on Santa's 'Naughty List'. But I hope you enjoyed hers and Robbie's antics.

Don't despair, the rest of Cat's wish list will be more Christmassy going forward. I'll be back in about two days with more updates. Till then, take care and stay safe over the holidays. Pip, pip, cheerio!