So I'm finally back and decided that the previously posted chapter wasn't something I was actually going for. I apologize for being away for too long but after being inspired by a lot of things in my life lately, I decided to rewrite a whole new chapter so I hope you guys would appreciate it. Thank you for everyone who's still reading this as of now and please kindly bear with me as I gradually get back my touch with writing again. By the way, hope you guys are doing well too!

The story will now be Rated M as I slowly incorporate and explore more slightly mature contents.

"I've never seen the sky this color before

It's like I'm noticing everything' a little bit more

Now that all the dust has settled

I rebut all my rebuttals

No one knows what it's like to be us"

-Strangers by Nature, Adele

Summary: Two flowers bloom steadfastly amidst the nights getting a little colder. Karma and Gakushū decided to play outside in the snow without a single care, and soon the world will know one way or another. It's now only a matter of having to come to terms with it.

"Have you eaten? Can you give me an update about your whereabouts? Are you staying out late tonight?"

"Do you want me to pick you up?"

"Are you okay out there? Please take care."

Gakushū sighed. He's such an asshole isn't he? His father is here trying to change for the better yet all he's ever done since was act up like a stuck-up brat. But then, that doesn't mean he's not at all being reasonable, changing still doesn't undo everything Gakuhou has done to him. If his father wasn't able to change overnight, then it was going to be the same thing for him.

"I'm fine, dad," Gakushū was about to leave him on read, until he reluctantly typed his response. He then impulsively deleted the last word, shortening his reply to just "I'm fine."

"Who is it? What's bothering you?" Karma asked as he gently combed Gakushu's hair with his fingers, while the latter laid his head down on his lap as they were both on the couch with the TV on even if their eyes were heavily glued to their phones.

"My dad's checking up on me," Gakushū told Karma as he subsequently curled up his body and shifted his position to the other side.

"That tickles," Karma involuntarily chuckled as he felt Gakushū's head press further down on his thighs, he then cleared his throat and spoke with an attempt to lighten him up, "that's supposed to be a good thing, right?"

"Well, yeah, maybe… or not, I don't know…" Gakushū muttered softly as he could feel his eyelids get heavier, the way Karma constantly caresses his scalp wasn't doing him any favor.

"You'll get used to it," Karma gave Gakushū some assurance to which he replied,

"I hope so…"

Not even a full minute has passed when Karma could feel a cold spot forming on his left thigh, he then heard a light snore amidst the noise coming from the background. He dropped his phone and looked down to check on Gakushū, his eyes closed and mouth slightly agape, wasn't he just talking to him a while ago?

Karma didn't expect him to be someone who drooled in his sleep, he found it cute though. He tried to hold his laughter, letting out a soft chuckle instead in order to not wake him up.

He then grabbed the remote and turned the TV off, what were they even watching anyway? For all he knows, this little thing sleeping on his lap, he loves and adores him dearly that he could and would rather watch him sleep for days.

I mean, how can anyone look this peaceful when they sleep? Him? He's like a total barbarian when he does, his loud snore all over the place while tossing and turning violently.

He carefully grabbed his phone to take a picture of him, but to his surprise, the flash was accidentally turned on.

Gakushū quickly reacted with a groan, his face all scrunched up, "Wha…"

Fuck.

Gakushū didn't seem to mind though as he went on and about with his sleep, subsequently stretching his arms out and repositioning himself while softly muttering, "you idiot…"

Karma was used to living recklessly because he had nothing left to lose one way or another, but then this little spoon suddenly came into his life and made him feel what it's like to be scared of losing everything.

He laughed to himself while still gently combing Gakushū's peach blond locks, then kissing him on the forehead before responding,

"Yeah, I love you too."

Deeper into the night and the two found themselves playing around and experimenting in Karma's wardrobe before leaving to grab something to eat.

"Try these on," Karma suggested as he handed Gakushū a beanie with tiny bear ears. The latter did as he was told without complaining.

"Oh, how about let's do something different?" Karma suggested as he rummaged through his drawer and took what seemed to be a makeup palette.

"Didn't expect you to be owning one of those,"

"Yeah, I stole it somewhere. I thought it looked interesting. Now sit and stay still,"

"Okay," Gakushū replied in a sing-song manner as he laughed, "someone's a little bit demanding tonight, isn't he?"

"Quiet now," Karma shushed him out, grabbed a brush and did his thing, whilst Gakushū motioned his fingers to zip his lips closed and trusted Karma to do all the work.

"Alright, and we're done…"

It went by quick, Karma lined his eyes with some peach eyeshadow to make his bags less obvious. And that same eyeshadow was also used on his cheeks to make his appearance less pale.

"So, how do I look?" Gakushū looked at himself in the mirror, asking for Karma's opinion. Although he honestly liked it. He never thought he would, but he liked it.

"How do you look?" Karma reiterated the question before he answered, placing a hand on his hip while admiring his work, "Pretty... No, Handsome? It's a little confusing,"

It didn't take long enough before Karma finally found the right words to say, "Oh, I know it now, you look stunning,"

A corner of his lip curled up upon hearing that, eyes gleaming, while he tried to keep composure and said,

"Alright, enough with all the smooth talk and flattery. Now it's my turn to do the trick."

"Okay, now try these on," It was the complete opposite for Gakushū, who took quite some time to thoroughly pick out an outfit for Karma and for himself.

Karma took off his shirt and sweatpants after he was given a pile of clothes to try on. But then with a devious smirk he suddenly decided to play and run around with only nothing but his boxers on, "make me."

They were now chasing each other around inside his small room like complete fools. Karma jumped on his bed and found himself cornered as he leaned on the wall.

"Come back here, you ass!" Gakushū exclaimed and threw a pillow at his face, before climbing onto the bed with him.

"Ow…" Karma yelped as the pillow hit his face.

Gakushū grabbed the pillow again and threatened him, "wear it."

"Okay, okay… sorry," Karma nodded, scratching his head as he pretended to surrender. But as soon as he got a hold of Gakushū he pinned him down to the bed and exclaimed, "gotcha!"

He definitely knocked the wind out of Gakushū who coughed and fought the urge to stare at the bare body displayed on top of him.

For a short while, with a mischievous grin, Karma gently choked his neck and pulled his hair, leaving his entire body weak.

He shuddered and gulped, squeezing his eyes shut in mere anticipation, but what he didn't expect next was Karma playfully squishing his cheeks then patting them playfully after all that built-up tension.

He finally let go of Gakushū, who sighed in relief, still trying to catch his breath in hopes of taming down his heart rate.

"You're batshit crazy," he told Karma as he got up and tried composing himself.

"I know, right? People don't call me a delinquent for nothing," Karma teased before he finally wore what Gakushū gave him. The latter shyly took off his clothes too and got changed.

Karma then asked for his opinion as he spun around with his arms raised and palms facing up,

"Alright, so how do I look?"

He was now wearing an ochre-brown corduroy shirt with a ribbed, black turtleneck underneath. It was paired with some beige slacks and dark brown leather boots lined with faux fur, topped off with some silver ear cuffs and dangling chain earrings all on the same ear.

As for Gakushū, he wore a taupe-gray, v-neck, cable-knit sweater vest paired with a plain white pullover shirt underneath. He matched it with some khaki pants and white sneakers. He was still wearing the bear-shaped beanie Karma gave him.

Gakushū, whose heart was still racing from what just happened a little while ago, gulped and answered, "you look, well… of course, stunning,"

"I knew you were going to say that…"

They both proudly looked at themselves in the mirror. It's as if they were given a newfound sense of freedom… And it felt more than liberating, to say the least.

"Hey…" Karma started as soon as he stepped out of the door and locked it from behind.

He looked at Gakushū intently who was a few steps ahead of him, contemplating on whether he should finally ask what's been bugging him lately.

Gakushū stopped in his tracks and waited for Karma to match his pace so they could walk on together side by side. He subsequently placed his hands inside his pockets to keep them warm. He then turned his head sideways and stared at him, asking, "Hmmm? What is it?"

"This thing we're in, is it okay with you if I… you know… tell people that we're… official?" Karma wasn't quite sure how to put it, he then added, "I mean, if you're not comfortable, that's okay. I can wait and I respect that, so…"

"I don't mind," Gakushū shrugged and simply replied as they continued to walk aimlessly without a place in mind.

Well, that was fast.

"Really? Cool then," Karma tried containing his excitement and smiled to himself, but the thing is, he barely even could. Now he could feel that thing in his chest begin to pound wildly, so he took Gakushū's hands and swung their arms playfully.

He can't just walk still as if he didn't hear what Gakushū said, so he began kicking some snow, jumping out of nowhere. He shouted, "fuck I'm so lucky!"

Gakushū wheezed in reaction to what Karma just did, who was displaying himself like a total idiot. Out of impulse, he pushed the latter down into a thick pile of snow beside the sidewalk.

"Oh, so we're playing now?" Karma responded, trying to catch his breath, then getting back on his feet as he sprinted towards his boyfriend who was now running away from him. "You like that, huh?!" Karma yelled as he threw a snowball on Gakushū's back.

"Fuck," Gakushū muttered under his breath as Karma was about to close in on him.

Karma then jumped from behind and charged his body towards Gakushū's, locking his arms around the latter's neck, throwing both themselves onto the cushiony blanket of white snow laying on the ground.

The two laid side by side and flat on their backs, laughing in unison until their eyes accidentally met yet again just for a fleeting moment. It always felt as if it was their first time doing that, as if they were reduced into mere strangers again. But that's actually the best part of it.

Karma broke the silence and spoke,

"That night, I thought it was just the moonlight doing the trick, but fuck, I guess your eyes are really pretty," he combed then ruffled Gakushū's hair right after, and stood up as if nothing had happened like he always does.

Gakushū gulped, still laying down on the snow, his cheeks grew red as he didn't know how to respond to what Karma just told him. Thank god it was pretty dark outside so he could save himself from further embarrassment.

He found himself smiling though, he pulled Karma right back in beside him without saying anything. And they both laid there like fools, until one of them scooted closer to the other.

"So… what now?"

Gakushū grabbed him by the collar and pulled him in until their lips were merely an inch apart. They could both feel their warm breaths grace each other's faces, a stark contrast to the cold weather. Karma froze, his eyes wide open, expecting something more but then Gakushū let go of him and stood up.

"I'm starving, we should go get something, don't you think?" Gakushū said with a yawn as he tiptoed and stretched his entire body.

The look on Karma's face was priceless.

He too got up with a noticeable frown on his face, pointing at him as he said, "I get what you're doing, Asano. You clever freak,"

Gakushū smirked, teasing him more, "oh so we're doing last names now, Akabane."

"Come on, let's 'grab' something to eat because you know, I've been craving for something thick with three 'C's,'" Karma joked as he grasped one of Gakushū's buttcheeks and slapped it. And just like that, Karma was able to get back at him.

"You perv," Gakushū raised an eyebrow and spat as he ran and broke away further from Karma.

Two former honor students fool around again as if they weren't worried about a single thing concerning their future, gradually coming to terms with everything the universe has thrown in their way.

It's as if they don't have the slightest care in the world, but that's alright.

And they were truly alright. Weren't they? They knew they'd be, at least they had to.

"You know what, let's do something stupid," Karma insisted out of nowhere.

"Aren't we already?"

"Hmm… you're not entirely wrong but…" He was probably right, but Karma went on with it anyway as he wore an earbud and placed the other pair on Gakushū's ear. He then pressed play while continuing what he's saying, "I'm thinking about something even more stupid than… that,"

"I used to hear a simple song, that was until you came along,"

Those first few lines nearly melted Gakushū away. At first, he tried resisting it, refusing to acknowledge how everything felt to him. But what's even the use?

He's truly gotten weak hasn't he? If that was all it took to get him all… emotional. His lips also curled up into a smile and he probably looks ridiculous right now, but he couldn't care less. The old Gakushū from junior high is probably looking down on him now, shaking his head in disappointment but then again fuck that, he couldn't care less.

"If you're worried, no one's probably going to see us except for some few drunkards on the street so… kindly bear with me on this one," Karma then held Gakushū's hand, their fingers interlocking. He lifted both their arms upward to at least shoulder level before placing his other hand on Gakushū's waist.

"With simple songs I wanted more, perfection is so quick to bore. You are more beautiful by far, our flaws are who we really are."

Likewise, he also placed his other hand behind Karma's waist as they danced slowly from side to side, pulling him in closer until their chins rested on top of each other's shoulders. Both of them couldn't help but smile to themselves as they savored the moment and could feel each other's heartbeats going haywire.

This felt new, as if they were again, well… strangers. But Gakushū had no qualms about it though. He liked this. They both knew they liked it. If only they could do everything for the first time again like mere strangers, then they gladly would without a thought.

It was when the song reached its climax that the both of them finally moved slightly apart, all the while still holding each other's hands and holding each other's waists, just to get a glimpse of each other's faces.

"You took my broken melody, and now I hear a symphony."

Gakushū looked at Karma intently, his eyes glistening like glass. And Karma could see the entire world right through him.

He really did felt like crying but then Karma scolded him, whispering,

"You're going to ruin the makeup, you idiot," Karma then decided to spice things up and twirl his boyfriend around.

Gakushū didn't know how it happened but all of a sudden he lost balance and fell, snapping his left ankle. He was yelping in pain.

"You idiot!" Karma exclaimed, holding his laughter, as he quickly bent over to help him.

"I can't believe I'm saying this but I kind of agree with you telling me that," Gakushū said, laughing to himself and panting as he scratched the back of his head.

"You kind of ruined the moment, you know?" Karma said.

Gakushū chuckled, "I know. I suck, don't I?"

"Yes, you kinda do," Karma lightheartedly agreed, to which Gakushū furrowed his eyebrows and gave him a death stare. That was when Karma cleared his throat and offered to help, "can you stand up on your own?"

Gakushū grunted as he tried to push himself up but up to no avail, he muttered under his breath, "shit."

Karma planted one knee on the ground with the other lunged in front of his hip for some stability and began instructing, "okay, wrap your arms behind my neck then lock your fingers…"

"Okay…" Gakushū whispered and carefully did what he was told.

"On three…" Karma counted before lifting Gakushū up, then carrying him bridal style as he continued walking in hopes of still finding an open stall to eat in despite it being so late in the night.

Gakushū carefully studied the former delinquent's face, discreetly admiring it the entire time while he was being carried.

"So have you decided what to eat for dinner yet?" Karma asked out of the blue, looking down on him.

Gakushū blushed and averted his gaze to hide what he was doing just a little while ago, answering him, "dunno…"

"You know what, I just got an idea…" Karma whispered then sprinted towards what seemed to be a parking lot of a closing grocery store, all the while still carrying Gakushū. This put quite a shock to the latter who was left with no choice but to tighten his grip around Karma's neck to prevent himself from falling over.

Karma then halted abruptly as he finally came across an empty grocery cart, he then carefully placed Gakushū down inside of it,

"I'm clever, aren't I?" He boasted as he began pushing the cart from behind in hopes of still finding an open fast food chain or convenience store nearby.

Gakushū scoffed, then laughed to himself as he still tried to comprehend how they both got themselves into this uncanny situation.

And while the city of stars eventually goes to sleep, two young, passionate souls wander recklessly through the labyrinthine streets. An outlandish, otherworldly fog slowly settled in above their heads, obscuring the pale moonlight that was barely even there in the first place, leaving nothing but the dimmed lamp posts to illuminate their surroundings.

The next thing they knew, the two were inside a convenience store and had yet to decide on what to eat. Gakushū remained comfortably seated inside the stolen grocery cart, hugging his knees with a lollipop stick he finished minutes ago resting between his lips.

Karma pushed around slowly and strolled down the microwavable food aisle. Then out of pure boredom an idea hit him up, he decided to take pictures of his strawberry blonde-haired boyfriend from behind while the latter didn't seem to notice until they came across a glass fridge, exposing their reflection.

"Is this one of your blackmail tactics again?" Gakushū turned around and asked while he still kept on chewing the tip of the lollipop stick. Although he didn't seem to mind Karma secretly taking photos of him.

"It's just for keeps, now don't you ruin my shot," Karma complained as he motioned his hands for Gakushū to get back to his previous position.

Gakushū let out a short laugh in response, his smile as gentle as the snow falling painfully slow in the winter night where they found themselves in, repeating what his boyfriend just told him, "for keeps..."

"So you know how I like anything strawberry flavored and your hair is strawberry blonde?"

"Hmm, what about it?"

"It really makes me think, you know. It probably means I was meant to like you,"

"You're being weird again," but to hell with that, that's what he likes about him anyway.

It didn't take long enough before they bumped into a familiar face.

A classmate of theirs crossed his arms and smirked as he began talking airily, "oh, aren't you that dumb one from class? Shouldn't they have demoted you to E-class already by now?"

Karma wasn't taking any of his bullshit tonight, "excuse me? What the fuck is your problem?"

Their classmate brushed off his response, clarifying himself, "not talking to you, Akabane. You know who I'm referring to."

Karma clenched his jaw, tightening his grip on the grocery cart handle as he tried his very best to contain himself, "take back what you said, you damn prick."

"You know what, you're actually quite decent for a delinquent. But you're telling me, that this failure right here is Kunugigaoka's previous topnotcher? It actually brings quite a shame to our school. I suggest you drop out early before Kunugigaoka High loses its credibility because of an outlier like you." Their classmate spat, then adding further insult to the injury, "and by the way, you look stupid with that shit you put on your face."

Gakushū almost didn't want to be there, feeling his heart sink by the second upon hearing those words. Well, the truth does hurt, doesn't it? With all the pressure and after everything he'd been through, it really does something to a person, does it? He used to be so driven and passionate but now he's been reduced into nothing but a watered down, dried-up husk of his former self.

He almost wanted Karma to stop defending him because, somehow, he felt that those words were… well, actually true, more than he was ever willing to admit.

Before Karma could even respond, Gakushū wrapped his arm around Karma's elbow, motioning for him to stop in hopes of dissipating the flames, "Karma, let's just get out of here…"

But there's no use in talking him out of it. He didn't want to stop there, "First off all, I did that to his face so how dare you insult me like that. Secondly, I've had it with you, you asshole. Unless you want to end up like the last person I beat up, I suggest you apologize to my boyfriend right now."

"Boyfriend? Are you kidding?" Their classmate scoffed, holding his laughter.

Karma grabbed him by the collar, "Do I sound like I'm kidding?"

"You know what, give me that," Karma whispered to Gakushū as he took the lollipop stick between his two fingers without a warning.

"I wonder if I push hard enough, will I be able to stab you in the throat with this?" Karma threatened their classmate, still grabbing him by the collar, emphasizing what he says by pointing the lollipop stick on his chest with every pause.

Raising both his hands in defense, their classmate tried negotiating his way out of the mess that he created himself, "h-hey, put that down, man…"

"Then apologize," Karma demanded, drawing a line below their classmate's chin with the lollipop stick, then continuing it further down in his throat. Karma pointed a little harder as the stick ended up in the notch between his two collarbones.

"F-fuck... I'm sorry, alright?"

Having had enough of it, Karma let go of the bastard by pushing him down to the ground, sending him off into a hurry.

"Hey, you good?" Karma asked with genuine concern as he went on and pushed the cart along the cereal section.

"Yeah," Gakushū answered, trying to keep things cool.

"Hey, don't let those words get into your head," Karma knew he wasn't that of a great motivational speaker but he reckoned Gakushū badly needed to hear him say this, "you'll bounce back before you know it, trust me. Just one step at a time."

But then he almost didn't want to… get back to his old self. He could get used to this, he'll get used to this. He's pretty content with what he has and wouldn't trade it for anything else.

He abruptly dismissed his thoughts and pointed out something to Karma,

"I actually find it quite… hot."

"What's hot?" Karma chuckled in response, a bit baffled, before he finally got on the same wavelength, then clarifying, "Oh, is it me you find hot or is it me calling you my boyf-"

Gakushū didn't have to guess why Karma suddenly stopped the cart and froze midway through his sentence.

The answer was standing right in front of them.

"A… Asano-sensei…" Karma felt shivers down his spine, did he hear what they were talking about just a while back? He definitely heard it, didn't he?

Gakushū broke out in a cold sweat as he couldn't move and do anything but remain seated inside the grocery cart, which felt quite embarrassing. His father began to speak, addressing the former delinquent,

"Akabane-kun, it's quite a surprise to see you with my son. I never expected you to become friends with him after all the… rivalry."

"Well, I can't help but acquaint myself with him when he's the only familiar face around…"

"Did you guys have dinner already?" Gakuhou asked rather casually, which seemed a bit out of character in both Karma's and Gakushū's shared perspective.

"Actually, we were just looking for something to eat," Karma responded nonchalantly, as if he wasn't aware at all that he was talking to the former school chairman.

Gakushū didn't have any contribution to the conversation, he just hopes that his father doesn't react too harshly knowing how Karma can get too blunt and straightforward, brazen even at times.

Trying to ease the overall awkwardness, Karma pointed something out from Gakuhou's cart, "that's a nice bottle of soju you got there, Asano-san. You got a good taste."

And Gakushū felt like face-palming himself mentally by now.

And there Gakushū thought he used to be the most overly confident person there ever was, then there's just Karma, "oh and you got some yogurt drink and lime soda as well to mix it with. Trying to keep up with the trends here, aren't we?"

"Oh, I wasn't planning to make a cocktail out of these, but since you mentioned, I might as well give it a try." Gakuhou replied, then offered the two, "Oh, you guys said you haven't had dinner yet. I was just about to purchase these onigiris which were on sale. What do you guys want to pair these with?"

"Ooh, strawberry milk would be nice!" Karma suggested with a rather upbeat tone, a complete opposite of the previously established atmosphere in the cereal aisle, which put Gakushū into further embarrassment.

But thankfully, his father suddenly smiling while responding to Karma somehow became a relief to him, it seemed… Well, genuine, "great, wait for me here while I get some."

"Your dad doesn't seem too bad," Karma whispered right away to Gakushū the moment Gakuhou left.

Gakushū sighed, crossed his arms and said, still with a little tinge of worry in his voice, "I hope it's not because he's in public."

A minute later Gakuhou came back with a handful of strawberry milk cartons and tuna onigiris, which all had been already paid for. He then handed a pair to Karma, to which the latter accepted with a formal 'thank you.'

"Do you need a ride home, Akabane-kun?" Gakuhou asked to which Karma replied,

"No thanks, I only live nearby so I can walk myself home."

"By the way, your son sprained his ankle and can't walk so… I'll probably go take him to your car," Karma added.

The moment they got to Gakuhou's parking spot, Karma carried Gakushū out of the shopping cart and gently let him down inside the car. He nearly died of shame while being helplessly carried around like that in front of his father, but now he's just glad it was over.

Karma closed the door for him. He noticed his father approached Karma for a talk and there he began to anxiously listen to their conversation,

"Thank you for taking care of my son, Akabane-kun."

"Oh, it's nothing," Karma shrugged, replying with a mouthful of tuna onigiri. He then took a sip of the strawberry milk to clear his throat, adding, "these taste great by the way so, thanks."

"Be safe on your way home."

"Yep, will do," Karma turned around and simply waved back as he began walking away.

As soon as the two of them got in the car, Gakuhou twisted the key to start the engine as he spoke,

"You look nice, that thing on your face, did you do it?"

It was Gakuhou's puny and pathetic attempt at making a small, random, casual conversation with his son. It still feels all too surreal for him, but he really did want to make an effort, at least somehow.

It also felt more awkward than both of them could ever imagine.

"Karma did…" Gakushū answered shyly, thinking that the light makeup was probably too much for his dad to handle. He's probably faking being calm right now for all he knows, but he asked right back anyway while they were both at it,

"Karma… What do you think about Karma?"

"He's quite nice… maybe a little different," Gakuhou put things out simply.

That wasn't the answer he's expecting. Gakushū impulsively asked one question after another, "Well, is that a bad thing?"

"I guess not at all," his father clarified as he finally stepped on the gas and drove away, "I know he's smart like you, he even beat you in the examination rankings once if my memory serves me right. I think it's great you're associating yourself with someone like him."

Oh if only he knew. Gakushū wished he had known already so that he wouldn't have to worry about a single thing. This heavy feeling on his chest, it's straight out consuming him wholly. He wanted to take things slow and easy but at the same time, he wanted to finally be at peace.

He'd rather tell him now than have somebody else break to him the news, right?

Right?

"Well, he's better than me now though," Gakushū reluctantly admitted, letting their conversation afloat only for it to die down quickly the moment he spoke.

"Oh..."

There was this brief moment of silence and awkwardness before Gakushū attempted to talk again.

He's probably taking things too fast. No. He knows he IS taking things too fast. But guess what, fuck it.

"Hey…" his voice trailed off, it's as if he regrets trying to get his father's attention again.

"What is it? Did I do anything wrong? Is there something bothering you?" Gakuhou, too, didn't know exactly how to approach this correctly. He's always been anxious lately trying to find the right words to say, it's still all too new for him.

Fuck. After having thought that he probably made a wrong judgment of things, Gakushū badly wanted to divert the conversation but to his misfortune, he couldn't seem to think of anything else. And his father being genuinely invested in his welfare lately doesn't help at all either.

"Well, no… it's just…" Gakushū couldn't seem to express how he feels in words.

Gakuhou didn't want to force things, sounding as calmly as possible, "okay, then do you want to tell me something?"

"I… I…" Gakushū stuttered, shutting his eyes in frustration, sighing as he looked away in further embarrassment, "nevermind,"

"Are you sure?" Gakuhou asked him one more time, then shifted his focus on the road after receiving no response from Gakushū, but he suddenly heard him blurt out something.

"I'm gay," it finally came out of his mouth, as he shuddered away and further explained himself, "bisexual probably because I liked girls before but I like boys now too… Look, I don't know… I might still be a little confused but… I'm overexplaining myself now aren't I?"

Gakuhou abruptly hit the brakes and parked the car beside the curb, he then slowly turned his head sideways to look at his son.

Fuck.

Gakushū was right, this wasn't the "take things slow" he was going for. How could he even bring himself to blame? Talking to his dad wasn't always an easy feat to begin with. He winced and waited for Gakuhou to scold him but the problem is, he still had nothing to say. Is he mad? Angry? Why is he even asking anyway? For sure he is, and that's for certain.

This is going to be bad, isn't it? Is he going to be homeless from now on? Is his dad going to kick him out here and now?

For a fleeting moment, still being overwhelmed, Gakuhou's eyes widened but then his lips slightly curled up into a smile. What is even happening?Has the world finally turned upside down? And to top things off, his eyes were filled with tears to the brim.

"You're being weird…" Gakushū whispered and couldn't even bring himself to look at him.

Gakuhou's heart was racing, he was still probably shocked, yes. But then, he's probably more glad that his son deemed him worthy enough to tell him this, disregarding all the reactions he could possibly have.

"Aren't you going to kick me out or say anything or scold me?" Gakushū finally broke the ice and asked him before expressing his train of thoughts, "you must be trying to hold your anger or something because I swore you could've hit me by now… I just wanted to tell you before you could find out yourself any sooner because you know, things would be messier that way."

"I'm…" Gakuhou, as usual, couldn't find the right words to say, "that's great news."

"Come on, the last thing I need right now is a fake reaction," and that was as blunt as Gakushū could get.

"I'm not faking it."

"You are, I can tell," Gakushū persistently insisted.

In hopes of erasing Gakushū's doubts he asked him one thing, "are you happy then?"

"What?" Gakushū was caught off guard by the question, but he answered immediately, "yeah."

Gakuhou then shifted his body to the side and turned so that he could hold Gakushū's hands tightly, then with a heartfelt tone, he told him, "then I'm happy too..."

He must be in a dream. He really wanted to believe what his father told him. It still seems too good to be true, doesn't it?

But in the end, that's probably all Gakushū needed to know.

"Do you… mean that?" There it was again, that doubt, the heavy feeling in chest, a lump forming down his throat, his eyes getting watery by the second and by the dreadful anticipation.

"I'm sorry for all those years when I made you feel unsafe to tell me things that you wanted to say but couldn't."

He just simply wanted his son back. And he knew things weren't going to be just a simple stroll in the park. With all honesty, the news was definitely hard for him to take in, but if this is one way to get him back, then he's going to be okay with it. Regardless, he'll do everything he could if he had to.

"And it means the world to me," Gakuhou continued, "for you to tell me that. Can we… Can we start things over? I'll right my wrongs, and… become a father to you so… please just let me support you. Look, I want to support you, I really do."

Gakuhou quickly pulled his son into a hug, the latter breaking out into a messy sob.

"Okay…" Gakushū replied, his voice all breathy and his reaction all over the place, laughing while crying as he still couldn't believe what he was hearing, "okay…"

This reminded him of that time when they both found out the news that his late wife had passed, Gakushū was only a mere ten-year old then. And right at the moment, Gakuhou couldn't see anyone else but that ten-year old Gakushū, fragile and vulnerable, crying in his arms.

He finally felt like a father again.

"Have you always known?"

Gakushū sniffed and wiped his tears, regaining his composure and now a little calmer that he's finally in the clear. He answered, "uh… well… I didn't… but the moment I realized, it always felt as if that's how I am supposed to be the whole time…"

"So… is it Akabane who you're going out with?"

"How did you…"

"Instincts, maybe…" Gakuhou answered, "and it was quite obvious… I knew the way he stared at you meant something… Can you formally introduce him again to me some other time?"

Gakushū nodded, smiling to himself, "yeah… yeah I'd like that."

But then he still had his reservations, "so… just to make things clear, you're not disappointed in me?"

"No… I'd never."

"Why not?"

"Hey, I'll always be proud of you, okay? Can you please take that as an answer already?"

Gakushū couldn't believe that that was all it took for him to finally say that. He still didn't want to believe it but… should he now?

He took a deep breath and composed himself, "I just… Thanks. Thank you… for hearing me out, is all… So…"

"And thank you for letting me back in. I really do appreciate it… and… I love you and I'm sorry…" It was Gakuhou being anxious all over again.

"We're kinda going back in circles already, you know?" Gakushū reminded him, before saying, "but hey, I'm sorry and I love you too so… I guess we're cool now?"

"Yeah, cool," Gakuhou let out a small chuckle and awkwardly offered Gakushū a fist bump, to which the latter lightheartedly accepted.

Gakuhou knew that this was going to be the first good night he was going to have in years.

And then they drove away with the windows down, welcoming the cool, gentle winter breeze with their faces, smiling with their chins resting on the palm of their hands.

What were once reduced into strangers, became the same strangers given another chance to know each other again. And just like strangers, with a clean slate, they were both ready to nurture, to make amends, to begin again.