CHAPTER 5

FEW WEEKS LATER

LEO

Mikey was getting bigger and unable to move like he used to, he spent a lot of time stretching, and watching Misia and Jason work outside on her ninjitsu. I would sit with him, he would have one hand on his distended belly, and one holding him up. I would try to sit right next to him, but he would shy away. I sighed we need to sit down and talk about what had made Mikey run from us.

I stood and called out to everyone in the yard, they all looked over and I gestured inside they nodded and we moved into the house. Mikey stood slowly, Jason staying close by to make sure to he didn't fall over. I wanted to grab Mikey and help him up, but Jason would growl if I get to close and Misia explained in her child innocence that 'Mama doesn't want to feel useless let him do it unless he asks for help' It sounded like it had been repeated a lot to her. So I didn't do anything and let Mikey do what he could, as soon as he was on his feet Jason was by his side his tail around his waist and guiding him inside.

I followed behind everyone was in the living room and sat on the floor leaving the chair for Mikey and Jason. Jason sat first and pulled Mikey in his lap, and letting Misia sit on the arm next to them.

"Alright everyone I think it's time to have a discussion," I said looking around the room, they all looked confused.

"What about Leo?" Mikey asked shifting in Jason's lap, tilting his head curious. That was good maybe he was willing to go along with this.

"I was thinking we could talk about the reason you left Mikey, maybe if you talk about it, it will heal the rift that opened between us and you," I said hope filling me, Mikey looked back to Jason and whispered to him, Jason whispered back and nuzzled him. Mikey turned back, and nodded agreeing.

"Okay, I'll go down the line of when I felt like lost each of you," Mikey said looking down at his hands twisting on his belly.

"That's good Mikey just take your time we are patient," I said hearing the almost silent oof from Raph from elbowed by Donnie. I frowned and turned to them glaring at the red banded turtle.

"Okay, first it was Leo, when he found Space-hero's. He wanted to be just like Captain Ryan, but the thing is he isn't a good leader. He is a bully and a dictator, he doesn't listen to his team mates and usually slaps them if they even dare to think something before him. Leo did become like him thinking that only he could make the games we played or that he was the only one to make the rules for anything we did. I started to pull away from him then afraid to be hit or yelled at if I did something wrong."

I was crying after Mikey explained how I started the rift between us, I looked down thinking back to when I did first find that show and realized that Mikey was right that I was becoming a dictator and bully to everyone.

RAPH

I felt like Leo was finally getting an eye opener for what he did when he found that stupid show, I had tried to get to see it, but he wouldn't see it and continued.

"Next was Raph," I looked up at that, wanting to now I needed to do make the relationship between me and my baby brother, I needed to know what happened.

"It started when Donnie and I fought to be able to go into the sewers alone, before he would always make sure we were safe, and when we came back the first few times he would check us over. Then it became worse he would get angry and he started to hit things and yell, I got scared and would hide when he got like that. I started to pull away when his anger never left, it scared me I thought he would attack me. I didn't want that anymore so I pulled away."

I sighed it seemed that anger was the cause for him to pull away from me, I needed to fix this my anger needed to be quilled. I needed to talk to Leo about calming excises, I groaned in my head in disgust having to ask Leo for anything.

DONNIE

I sighed I knew Raph's anger cause problems, and Leo's stupid show would also be a problem. I sat quietly waiting to hear cuased the rift between myself and Mikey. I looked over to him he looked small, even with a full belly, that seemed to grow everyday. He looked ready to pop, but it would be another month or two before he would give birth to the baby.

"Last is Donnie, it didn't happen until recently, for a long time it felt like it was me and Donnie against the world, we were a powerful duo, and nothing could stop us" I puffed up at that, I was always willing to do what Mikey wanted and we would play for hours. It went for less time after I started to make everything for the lair to function. But I always made time for Mikey, so where did it go wrong.

"Or so I thought, it was when April came into the picture, after she started coming down to the lair Donnie stopped talking to me stopped paying attention to me. I felt my world crumble around me, and the gaping hole in my chest just grew until it consumed me. I felt like I was underground and nobody could or would hear me, or help me out. After I lost Donnie we found Leatherhead, I found another reason to stay even though I knew that my brothers didn't want me. Then Leatherhead got his own friends and I felt like I was holding him back. I felt lost and decided to leave, I told Leatherhead what was going on and that I was leaving the city, at that point I didn't think that I would ever go back at that point. Then I met Jason and he showed me the world over again showering me in love and affection."

The speech ended with Mikey looking defiantly at us, his look showed that he didn't believe telling us this would change anything. Now that I know what happened it became clear to me, I did notice Mikey pulling away from Leo and Raph when we were little and he only seemed to spend time with me. Then he stopped 'pestering' me and was silent more, we pushed to far and he pushed back.

I lowered my head feeling April rub my shell and Casey rubbing my thigh, I looked up at them, and whimpered, I ruined my relationship with my only little brother because of a girl I had fallen for. There has been millions of others who could balance family and partners since the beginning of time and here I am fudging it and running my little brother from his home.

MIKEY

I watched my brothers break, my hard gaze not leaving them, I noticed that Donnie whimpering in suppressed sobs, Leo was trying so hard not to cry and Raph looked angry. I shrunk into Jason still watching my brothers watching their reactions, Misia crawling into my lap and curling up on my chest knocked me out of my stupor. Jason picked her up and set me on my feet.

"It is late Mikey, Misia and I are going to bed you may stay down here and mull over what Mikey has told you," he said guiding me to the stairs and helping me up. I leaned into his hold and closed my eyes tired from dumping all of my dark secrets onto my brothers, I looked back over Jason's arm seeing them watching me go up the stairs. Turned back and went down the hall. Once in the room, Jason helped Misia in to bed, kissed her goodnight I did the same and she fell asleep quickly. I crawled into bed and let Jason curl around me, falling asleep feeling comforted and safe.

I woke to feeling drained and tired still, I had wanted to go back to sleep. Misia had other ideas and was jumping into the and under the blankets coming between me and Jason. I looked down to see her duel colored eyes filled with tears the blue and gold shimmering with fear.

I sat up and held her close and letting her cry until she had nothing more to give. Once she calmed once more, I set her down on the bed, Jason had sat up as well and curled around her. He was laying on the bed and had her on his stomach and his tail curled over her legs and belly.

"I had a nightmare," Misia said a tremble to her voice and more tears spilling from her eyes. "It was bad and dark, I couldn't see anything, but I could hear. think someone was hurting the baby."

MISIA

I was sitting with Daddy behind me curled around me keeping me safe, and Mama was in front of me. I had my bunny in my arms and sniffled, Daddy nuzzled my cheek and I hugged his nose.

"Misia, Sweetheart nothing will ever get to you or your sibling, I won't let anything happen, you came out perfectly fine and this one will to, I promise nothing will happen," Daddy said while Mama curled up next to us and wrapped his arms around me as well, I laid down on the bed between them and fell asleep curled around my bunny and feeling both of them curl around me giving comfort.

JASON

Having comforted the crying child and having her fall asleep between us, I looked up to Mikey who was holding Misia close to him. I held them to my body, I sighed closing my eyes.

"Why would she have a dream like that?" I asked bumping foreheads with Mikey, sadness in my eyes.

"Why would she have that kind of dream?" I asked looking into his deep blue eyes, which sparkled in the dim light from the moon.

"Because she believes that our lives are dangerous and that her little sibling will be in danger the moment they come into the world," Mikey said his voice calm and gentle, Misia murmuring in her sleep.

"Well she's safe and we made sure of that," I said a little louder then I meant, and Misia stirred, we waited with baited breath to see if she would wake. She didn't and we heaved a sigh of relief.

"Think about it Jason, she dreamt about her and the baby, not us or my brothers her and the baby, she's afraid that she won't be able to keep the baby safe herself, she want's to protect them, and feels she can't. I'm just glad she's happy about the baby, and doesn't resent them," Mikey said he was only gentle like he was talking to Misia, I knew it wasn't condescending, and I appreciated it, Mikey was always good at explaining things in a way I would be able to understand, he was even able to make a child friendly version of the explanation for Misia.

I smiled Mikey would make a wonderful nanny or even small child teacher. He refuses to believe that and says that he wouldn't make a good teacher or nanny because he was unfocused and couldn't stay on topic.

I smiled and pulled the duo close to me and closed my eyes: "I'm glad she is happy for her sibling, let's go back to bed."

Mikey nodded his head and sighed, falling asleep, I followed them into the land of slumber. The next morning came to Misia sitting up quietly playing with her bunny, and Mikey still sleeping soundly eyes shifting from what he's dreaming about.

I sat up and picked up Misia who cooed and cuddled close to me. I tucked Mikey back in and walked quietly out of the room, letting him get more sleep.

I went down stairs seeing the three brothers in the kitchen each looking like they hadn't slept at all. April and Casey were cooking breakfast and Cole off to the side watching what was going on.

I stepped in and set Misia at the table April set a plate of french toast cut up with light powder sugar and syrup. I handed her sippy cup over with orange juice, I grabbed the plate April handed me and sat down as well.

Leo looked up his eyes dull and half lidded, he sighed and thanked April halfheartedly.

"I thought we could handle what ever Mikey had to say about us, but he tore us down, and didn't even seem to care," Leo said Raph and Donnie nodding along neither looking up or noticing the food placed in front of them.

"Now that is a lie, Mikey does care, he cares far more then I thinks he needs to. He has always cared about you and I don't know why. I heard what he had said last night a lot over the three years we had been together. I was the one to hold him as he cried and sobbed when Misia got hurt or sick, thinking that he was a bad mother, and that we would do better with out him. We have done all we can to reassure him and comfort him when his depression hits hard, but what he needs is you. For some reason he still loves you three and nothing would ever make his stop." I finished my speech staring into their eyes I never moved from them I just watched them waiting.

Leo sighed and looked away, Raph looked upset, but not angry, Donnie was looking down in his cup of coffee.

"Mama is always, uhhh, Daddy what's the word you always use?" Misia asked looking at me her duel eyes glittering in the curiosity.

"He's always over thinking," I said helpfully drinking my juice.

"Right Mama always over thinks things and when he does he goes silent and doesn't want hugs," Misia said a little sad and setting her her hot pink sippy cup on the table.

That made the three flinch and look away, I was finished with my food seeing that Misia was done as well. I picked up her plate and mine and brought them to the sink. I turned back around to pick up Misia and set her back on the ground she went running off to play. I turned back to the sink and washed the dishes, then I turned and grabbed the plate for Mikey and went up stairs.

MIKEY

I woke to the smell of french toast and a sweet voice in my ear. I opened my eyes and seeing Jason sitting on the bed, holding a plate. I yawned and sat up getting a kiss from my mate, I smiled sleepily and leaned into his side. I felt a kiss to my head and hummed.

I sat up when the plate was handed to me, and started eating. It was silent, but it wasn't uncomfortable, it was pleasant and filled with love. I hummed as I finished my food and the plate was taken. We sat there in silence for a bit longer until I couldn't help but ask.

"How did my brothers look when you went down there?"

"They were very tired and didn't seem to eager to do much of anything today," Jason said his voice vibrating in his chest. I sighed and stood, I stretched as much as my belly would allow. I rubbed it soothing the baby. Jason stood as well, and put his hand on mine, I looked up and saw his golden eyes staring softly down at me. I smiled and kissed his lips, before getting out of his hold and going to the door.

We left the room and I went down the stairs and going down, I saw Misia running around her bunny in the air and she was laughing. I then saw the reason why Cole was behind her trying to catch her. I saw the moment Misia saw me, her duel eyes lighting up and she changed course and ran at me. I bent down and caught her and hugged her, I stood and saw Cole bend down trying to catch his breath.

"She is fast when she wants to be," he said panting slightly.

"I know, but she will always run straight to mama, no matter what," Jason said rubbing his hand on Misia's head.

"Oh that's no surprise she is a mama's girl for sure," Cole said laughing, I giggled and cuddled with Misia, who just hugged me, and glared at the boys.

"Stop laughing at my Mama," she said growling and showing off her sharp teeth.

That caused them to stop and look up at us smirking, I fake gasped and hugged Misia closer to me, feeling her long tail flicking with agitation. Jason and Cole stalked closer and I stepped back, smiling. I looked down to Misia who nodded back, and we took off down the hall. I passed by the others and ran outside, Misia was laughing and had climbed onto my shoulders. We ran towards the trees Misia squealing the whole way, once under the trees Misia stood steadily on my shoulders. She tensed and jumped into the branches scrambling onto the branch. I stopped running and looked up proud of my little one, this was the first time she had been able to do this. We had been trying to teach her to jump into trees in case we needed her to hide in the foliage.

Jason and Cole came up, both were panting and and huffing, then a squeal from Misia brought their attention to her on the branch.

"Look Daddy, I did it, I finally did it!"

Jason gasped and smiled wide, his bright golden eyes shining with pride only a father could show. I smiled and watched as they went back and forth Misia dancing around on the branch and Jason following her on the ground. I laughed, and stepped over to Cole and called out to the duo.

"Hey I'm going back to the yard, ya'll can play in here, but I need to rest."

I then turned and went back to the yard and finding a good patch of sunshine, I laid down, closing my eyes. I felt thumps next to me and looked up expecting my mate and daughter, but it was my brothers. I blinked several times and sat up, they followed as well, their eyes down cast and and heads down.

"What's up guys?" I asked tilting my head.

"I thought we could handle what you said last night, and while there wasn't much detail in what you said, the emotion behind it was heavy, and it hit hard. We treated you so badly, but yet you stayed with us for so long, you so much stronger then us. I'm sorry Mikey, I'm so sorry. What we did was wrong and uncalled for, please I know it will take time for you to forgive us, but please give us a chance."

I had looked at Leo when he started to talk and the further he went with his apology the more tears fell from his eyes. I frowned and went to reach out, but stopped, afraid that the gesture would be unwanted. Raph moved to sit next to me, and Donnie did the same on the other side and Leo moved behind me, hugging me. I didn't move not even to hug them back or anything, I just sat there.

Then it hit the fear and sadness, the fear of losing my brothers and that their anger would be directed at me that day and I would be going to bed with bruises, and the sadness of the realization that I had lost them not physically, but emotionally and mentally.

I hunched over as much as I could in the hold of my brothers and my belly in the way, and cried. I heard Jason and the others coming from the woods, Misia's happy squeals quieting and tiny footsteps approaching. A small hand patted my head as I sobbed and it just made me sob harder. Leo pulled me closer to him and Raph Donnie hugged harder after Raph pulled Misia into the middle. I cuddled close to my daughter and just sobbed, being soothed by my brothers and daughter.

I sobbed until I had nothing left in me, I sniffled and went to wipe me nose, but a cloth was pressed to my beak and wiped it away. I opened my eyes to see Leo had helped out, and was also crying. I looked to my other brothers and saw tears in their eyes. I felt Misia shift in my lap and looked down, seeing her hugging her bunny close and was patting my belly. I laughed and rubbed her head getting her attention. She looked up and cooed her voice a soothing coolness to my ears.

Once we all calmed down, I shifted a bit more looking for Jason, who was off to the side his arms crossed and his eyes staring at the group, waiting for when he needed to swoop in and help. I smiled at him and nodded letting him know that I was okay.

"Thanks guys, seriously, needed to hear that," I said sniffling, feeling someone wipe the tears that had gathered there. I looked up to see Raph was the one holding my face, as he cleaned it.

"There is no need to thank us, Mikey, this is something we should have told you a long time ago and never stopped telling you. We love you and we always will, nothing will ever make us stop, ever."

I smiled and hugged them, Misia stuck in the middle and started to squirm. I giggled and wiggled around and they let go, and I let Misia out of my hold. She sat up and jumped out from the group and ran to Jason.

We had spent hours out in the sun, Jason and Misia training off to the side never to far away. I sighed and settled into a nice doze surrounded by love and attention that I had been craving from my brothers.

Later that night we were in the living room, and Leo was being checked over by Cole.

"So everything is fine now, I can train again?" Leo asked.

I looked back in time to see Cole nodding putting his tools away, Leo smiled and cheered loudly in his chair.

"Great then first thing tomorrow we are heading home and taking back the city," Leo said. I sat up, wide eyed, a little fear trickling down my spine and making my blood run cold.

"What's the matter Mikey, are you okay?" Donnie asked sitting up as well.

I whimpered and scooted back into Jason, hiding into his chest.

"Mikey is afraid that Splinter would be upset with him for running away," Jason said holding me close, I wasn't afraid of my dad, but I was afraid of his reaction for returning.

"Mikey, hey look at me, Master Splinter was upset with you leaving so suddenly, he would have liked you going to him to talk, but he got over it and just wanted you to return," Leo said while holding my cheek and gently rubbing his thumb on it. I sniffled and looked up at his eyes and saw nothing but truth in them. I hardened my eyes and nodded, I needed to face the music.

"Good so we going back first thing tomorrow?" Leo asked his eyes soft and understanding if I said no. I nodded and stood up Jason coming with me, and holding me close. Misia came running up and climbed up Jason's body and climbing to his shoulders.

"I think an early turn in would be good, so we can leave early, we have a long drive home, and a long day ahead to get our father and home back," Leo said and went up stairs after getting agreements from everyone. Jason and I went up stairs with Misia laying in Jason's arms falling asleep, from his heart beat.

We woke early to Leo coming into the room quietly, trying to not wake Misia, we nodded and started to pack our belongings, something we had done so many times in such shorter times. While Jason packed I picked up Misia in her sling and settled her on my chest, her bunny held between me and her. She mumbled and settled further into her sleep. We looked at each other and nodded, we were ready to face the rest of my family.

We went outside to see the others packing up the van, and hitching the car Donnie and Casey had built in the months of being here. I looked to Jason, grabbed his hand and climbed into the back of the van.

"Here Mikey I set a place for Misia to be safe when we have to make sharp turns or dodge bad guys," Donnie said pointing to the bench with a car seat and five point harness next to it. "I also made a spot for you as well, so you don't have to worry about the little one inside you."

I smiled and moved to put Misia into the seat and buckled her in, and sat next to her. I buckled in and Jason sitting on the floor next to me, his body leaning on the side.

We were ready to go get our father and home back, and save the world.