Slow, so slow, I fell to the ground on my knees
So don't fall in love there's just too much to lose
If you're given the choice then I'm begging you choose to walk away, walk away
Don't let it get you, I can't bear to see the same happen to you. - Terrible Things by Mayday Parade
The days passed like they always did. I had my job working with my parents in our construction business while Dabi did whatever work where he didn't need a resume or customer service skills. I asked him if he wanted to work with me, but he'd always demurred, telling me that he was not the kind you brought home to mom and dad. That our relationship should remain a secret.
I was content with it because he was fun to be with. He kept things clean, and we seemed to have enough to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table and date nights to boot. He'd say that it didn't matter to him, as long as I was happy. The plainest fact was that he is a wanted criminal anyway. Even if I did take him to meet my parents, or put him on the lease, or any of the things a young girl might dream about, I would only be unhappy with what came next.
He was right, our relationship had to remain secret. That's probably why, when I realized I was pregnant, I couldn't tell him. I knew it would be the end of things for us. He could never be someone's dad from Tartarus. I couldn't put him on a birth certificate or family registry. So, whenever he tried to pin me down, saying that I was acting differently or asking if I was sick, I would detour him with kisses, and ignore the problem growing between us.
The morning that I woke up for a day off for my birthday, and he wasn't there, I was terrified. He'd been moody for the last few days, and I knew in my heart that this was it. When I sat up, making a sheet of paper flutter on his pillow, I reached for it with dread.
My dearest,
I'm sorry for lying. All the times I lied to you, I thought I was saving you from something. I suppose I was. I was saving you from me, but it didn't work. I love you and, kamis help you, I think you love me, too. I know you're pregnant. You're the absolute worst liar, that's something I always enjoyed about you. If you could, for me, one last thing: name him Kaiden if he's a boy. If it's a girl, my mother's name is Rei. I've always loved her name. Consider it a request, one more stick it to my old man.
I am leaving, one last job for the League. I know, and I am sorry. You believed in me, and I let you down. However it ends, I don't think I'll be coming back from this. I will have to face my brother, and he will win. I wanted to change, but I had the wisdom enough to know that I couldn't. Don't give up, love our child, don't tell anyone who his worthless father was. Don't saddle the child with my name. Let me leave this life as I wanted: free from my father. Petty, I know. You're probably angry now, maybe you're sad - knowing you, probably both. Be happy that I am finally free.
Yours forever
I crumpled the letter in my fist. He believed in me, but not himself. I lay my hand over my womb, and flipped on the television. Somehow I knew I would see him one last time, and though I had to watch a few hours of morning shows, it finally aired:
"Breaking News!" The newswoman looked up from her papers, "Several wounded and at least five dead in an attack by the League of Villains on the Shinjuku district following a landmark conference for Quirk rights. The hero Shoto of Endeavor Incorporated supported by heroes from the All-Might Memorial Agency, most notably the All-Might chosen successor, Deku, arrived on scene..."
I muted the television, big, hot tears rolled down my face, plopping on my thighs as I stared at the carpet. I smoothed the letter before folding it into a tiny rectangle. He has known everything all along, and I hadn't known a thing. I hadn't wanted to see. I pulled open my nightstand's drawer, and tucked the letter against the far end.
I shook my head, still crying, and as the TV panned over a very familiar body, I flicked it off. I stood, and made up my mind to do the best I could without him. A shower later, I was standing on my mother's front stoop. I wouldn't tell her everything, a secret isn't a lie. It just feels like one.
AN/ SO. IF Dabi is a Todoroki, I think he is approximately five years older than Shoto. I put him at 26 for this fic. In this chapter, it's a few days before Ochaco's 21st birthday. Tartarus is the name of the Quirk prison where All for One is being held. It's a boy, and it's pronounced cay-den. SORRY Marika. Don't hate me!