What he never realized

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He wasn't sure if he had been alive or not. If he even was alive or not. He had felt like he had been floating for the longest of times, drifting in an out of the same limbo, floating and falling at the same time. Weird images had appeared in his mind, either dreams or the real world, he had no idea.

He remembered pictures of the pine forest, the river and the sound of the birds singing, a breeze passing by while he was either walking or running. Sometimes he was alone, other times there were other people there, but he couldn't recognize them, couldn't see any faces, and therefore couldn't read them. But he could feel them – different emotions of happiness, excitement, comfort and playfulness, the latter being a feeling he hadn't felt much. It was something that was so foreign and yet it was a yearning he didn't knew he had.

Other images had appeared in his head as well, images of the alleys where he grew up, pictures and illustrations of the life he had, his stomach growling and going hungry, puke, fear, and a constant need to look out for himself. Fists had been hurled at him, words he hadn't heard in a long time penetrating his mind, words of being a freak, a misfortune, a mistake, and a useless little brat. He had hidden that away to the best of his ability, the words hurting even more than the punches did, making him flinch in his mind.

Those two different scenarios had appeared in between intervals of pure darkness, having no recollection of what was happening, his mind disorientated and felt broken, not even having the capacity to wonder whether or not it could be put together again

Though, after what felt like a lifetime had passed, his mind had started to ease, the pictures and images starting to fade as all that had enveloped him was darkness, a kind of black limbo that finally made him relax in his mind, whatever pieces had fallen could be picked up again, making him believe that he finally had found rest.

It was odd for him to wake up. It should be a usual occurrence, something that should be normal and without too many questions and yet it felt alien. He had no idea how long he had been out for, but it felt like he had been sleeping for an eternity, the first things he felt was a dull pain in his side, a pain which he had remembered being far greater and much more unbearable than what this was.

The next thing was his head, being oddly heavy but not throbbing like a headache would, a part of him wondering what had happened to him. He was awake and yet, his eyes were too heavy for him to open them, instead took in a long exhale, letting the air fill his lungs completely before slowly letting it out again, feeling his entire system relax from breathing alone. Which meant he wasn't dead.

The realization struck him so hard that he would have sprung up from wherever he was and look around, but he wasn't in favor of moving, instead let himself remain and felt the air course through his body. The next thing he realized was that he was laying on something, something soft and was cushioning his body. A frown appeared from the thought, as he began fighting his heavy eyelids to make them open, letting out a groan just to hear himself talking. He was awake, he could hear it and he could feel it.

With that in mind, the determination flushed against him, stubbornness making him force his eyes open, his eyelids finally obeying to his command. His vision was blurry, either water or something else sitting in his eyes, making him blink and ultimately close his eyes again. A sigh left him, as his eyes opened again, the blurriness starting to disappear as he was looking up into something.

To his utter surprise, he was looking into a ceiling made of dark grey stone and rocks, moss sitting in the crevices in some of them. A cave? How was he in a cave? He had never been in a cave before but a part of him believed that it would be much different than this, there wouldn't be something this soft in a cave. Was he dreaming again?

The thought disappointed him, making him move his hand around to try and grab something. His hand met his own stomach and chest, haven't even registered the blanket that was over him, or the pillow that was cushioning his head. Despite that this felt different, than the ones at the Chaotix's and at Amy's, this blanket feeling more like leather but was pleasantly warm. He frowned as his fingers ran over the leather, lifting his hand above his eyes to look at it, confirming that his glove was gone, clean white bandages surrounding his left palm. A wiggle of his toes confirmed that his shoes were gone as well, though he still had his age-old socks on, suddenly wondering what had happened to his items. He also realized that his cloak was gone, not being around his shoulders like he remembered it being the last time that he was awake.

Curiosity filling the pick pocketer's mind made him turn his head, the movement being slow as his brain felt like it had been squashed and readjusted in the span of a couple of seconds. The next things he saw made him frown perplexed and confused, wondering where the hell he was. Shelves were installed into the rock wall in front of him, different items between jars, bowls and what looked like dead or dried plants were placed there. Where was he?

His mind went into analyze-mode, cerulean orbs looking around at the different items that were here, trying to determine where he might be. Despite his mental search he came up with nothing, the fox wondering what had happened.

As his eyes travelled to the right, he suddenly saw someone he had completely forgotten about, his eyes widening from the realization alone.

Sonic was there.

The blue hedgehog was sitting close to his head, leaning up against the bed, he guessed he was laying on. His blue head was looking in front of himself, the experienced pick pocketer being aware that he was awake since gloved fingers were fidgeting in his lap. He was sitting uncharacteristically still from what he remembered what Sonic was used to doing, the fox wondering how long he had been sitting there – and where he was.

He frowned again and moved one of his tails, having not realized that it had been squashed underneath him, the movement making the other tail slither down the side of the bed. Tails watched as the hedgehog's head turned to see what had disturbed his peripheral vision, blinking at the tail before turning his head around towards him.

The gaze that the fox read from the hedgehog made him almost gasp out loud, never having seen such worry plastered all over someone's face before. Crevices were around his eyes, a downcast face with his mouth being in a thin line, worry and concentration plastered deep into the green orbs he was looking back at. But the moment he had seen it, the same moment it had disappeared, Sonic's face suddenly turning into pure and simple relief, a smile appearing on his lips, a light appearing in his eyes as the crevices and wrinkles disappeared, a sigh leaving the hedgehog's mouth.

"Thank Chaos you're awake," he breathed out, something that was said in between the sigh, scooting around and sat so he was facing the fox, the smile staying on his lips. "How are you?"

Tails hadn't almost heard the question, his eyes still observing and reading Sonic's face, blue irises darting around the hedgehog's face. The utter relief was still an overwhelming present in his face, the smile on his lips genuine and he really wanted to know if he was okay.

He was sitting crossed legged in a relaxed position, his body wasn't tense, and his quills wasn't risen in the back of his head, telling the fox that wherever they were it was safe. But still, he was – relieved? He licked his lips, remembering that Sonic had asked him a question, moving his head a bit.

"I-" he coughed from the hoarse voice that came out of his mouth, spit and whatnot clogging his throat without even knowing.

He hardly registered that Sonic had moved from his coughing, the hedgehog getting to his feet and moved away from him, somewhere else in the cave that Tails didn't care for. His coughing fit ended at the same time that the speedy blue came back to him, Tails lifting his gaze to watch a clay bowl containing a transparent liquid, a part of him concluding that it was water.

He blinked at it, before putting his palms onto the bed, and lifted himself up further to sit. The movement made him hiss, his left side protesting and screamed with a hot fierce pain. He decided to ignore the hand that Sonic had outstretched at him, instead let out a sigh when he was as comfortable as he could be, reaching out for the bowl that he had been presented.

Firm fingers clasped around the clay bowl, both hands gripping around it to make sure that he didn't spill before lifting it towards his mouth. The liquid was pleasantly cool and fresh as it went down his throat, drinking practically all of it in the course of a couple of seconds. With a pleasant sound, he placed the bowl in his lap, closing his eyes for just a second as he sighed again, taking a moment to appreciate what he had feared

He was alive.

The mere thought made him lick his lips, his fingers gripping around the clay bowl tighter to avoid making them shake.

The thought had scared him, had scared him more than he thought it would and now that he realized that he indeed was still in the realm of the living a part of him could still not believe that he was actually here.

"Feeling better?" He was pulled out of his stupor by the question, opening his eyes and blinked down into his lap before looking back at Sonic.

He was standing upright, hands familiarly on his hips as a smirk was accompanying his face. The relief had dimmed somewhat, what was left behind was pure and true happiness, the go-lucky, carefree, and insanely relaxed hedgehog he knew he was. Nevertheless, the pick pocketer found himself nodding.

"Yeah," he answered, his voice sounding better as he bit his lip, keeping a firm grasp on the clay bowl, as if it were the lifeline that kept him here with the living.

He looked up again, letting the thoughts linger in his mind as he observed the many items around him, the shelves, jars, plants and so much more stored around them.

"Where – are we?" He asked, as his eyes caught sight of the campfire on the ground, seemingly unused and abandoned, his eyes travelling around and analyzing the small home.

"You're not gonna believe me," his attention returned to Sonic, after the sentence, the hedgehog scratching the back of his quills, his face morphing into a mixture of hesitation and excitement with wrinkles appearing around his eyes, though his eyes were shining with amusement.

"So, after we got attacked by that bat assassin woman, you were pretty badly hurt and passed out and such. I don't know if you remember but I hurt my leg pretty bad too," he explained, lifting his left foot from the floor. Tails looked down, having almost forgotten that Sonic had cried out when they had fought the bat, seeing some white bandages strapped around his calf, some sort of wooden rod support being on either side of the leg.

"So, at the time I couldn't run, and I couldn't explain why but there was a part of me that felt like I had to continue instead of going back to Kroxburg. So, I carried ya, and went into the mountain region and have climbed a ton of hills, you should see this place," Sonic explained, throwing out his arms for emphasis while the fox was slowly swallowing the fact that the hedgehog had been forced to carry him.

"It took some time, but we came over this hill at some point and I look up and there's this massive waterfall and in the sky – there is an island. Floating in the sky, that's where we are right now," he explained, letting out a scoff while shaking his head, the trained pick pocketer reading that he could hardly believe it himself.

"We could only come up here because there was a waterfall. And I, eh, used that blue Chaos Emerald that you had to get us up here. But then I met this dude," he suddenly said, as if he remembered, looking back at Tails.

"He's an echidna! The only other echidna I have met is Tikal, but this guy he must live here alone or something because he came up to me and threatened us. But I explained the situation and he was actually the one to help you with the infection and the wound and such," he finalized, taking in a breath before he shrugged his shoulders.

"So yeah. That's how we're here," Sonic ended, as if he had simply explained how clouds appeared in the sky. The fox on the other hand blinked, trying to sort out the barrel of information that had been catapulted at him, eventually looking around the small home again.

"You're right. I don't believe you," Tails started, observing the clay bowl in his hands, noticing the ragged edges and the crack that was on the edge of it, looking crudely homemade. As the information started to settle in his mind, he frowned at another statement, looking at Sonic.

"I caught an infection?" He asked, at the same time that he moved the clay bowl out of his lap.

He pushed the blanket out of his lap, looking at the bandages that was wrapped around his stomach, one hand hovering over where he had been stabbed. A red and yellow splotch was on the general area where the knife had impacted him, catching sight of his fur being discolored and slightly clumped down his side, where his blood had been running.

"Yeah, you caught one when you tried to stop the bleeding," he looked back at Sonic from the inquiry, blinking at him to make sure what he heard was right. He opened his mouth to ask another question, though the change in Sonic's expression made him falter, clear hesitation appearing around his eyes as he bit his lip, lifting his hand.

"May I?" He asked uncharacteristically polite, a kind of question he would never have expected the hedgehog of all mobians to ask. Another part of him was wondering what he was asking about, but before he had time to give him an answer, the hand came towards him.

He only managed to lean a bit away from him, before the palm of Sonic's hand landed on his forehead, having brushed away the bangs in the process. His heart skipped a beat from the sudden touch, looking straight at Sonic to read his expression. A concentrated frown had replaced the hesitation, though satisfaction soon came after that, a well-known smile coming to his lips.

"You're cooler already. Looks like whatever Knuckles gave you helped a lot," he explained at the same time that he pulled back his hand, crossing his arms over his chest like nothing had happened.

The feeling of the cold palm against his forehead lingered for a couple of seconds, having never experienced the kind of care that had been put into it. Sonic's sentence once again saved him from thinking too much about it, narrowing his eyes slightly.

"Knuckles?" He asked, the words being completely foreign and strange in his mouth, the hedgehog grinning before nodding.

"Yeah. That's the dude's name who helped you. Not that different from Tails now is it?" He asked while quirking a brow at the fox, another gleam appearing in his eyes.

The pick pocketer furrowed his brow at him before looking back into his lap, being somewhat glad that Sonic didn't know his name since he most likely would make fun of it, being the jokester that he was. It had been another reason for him to remain on the street.

"He says that we need to stay here, he needed to do something – he brought some food, you hungry?" Tails perked up from the mentioning of food, seeing the hedgehog gesture with his hand towards the other end of the small home, the fox's gaze following. In a wicker basket, he saw four big fruits in it, ones which he hadn't seen before, the color wavering between yellow and orange, looking bright and delicious.

Though, there was a gaping hole in his stomach, one that didn't ask for food that made him bite his lip.

"No, not – not right now," he declined in a low volume, looking back into his lap, since there had been a nagging feeling in the back of his head that was starting to take over his thoughts, one which wasn't uncommon to him and something that he had been taught long ago. And yet, he still didn't understand, had no idea as to why this had happened.

He furrowed his brow.

"You sure? I mean you've been knocked out for a while, maybe some food will-"

"Sonic? Why did you help me?" He asked seriously, looking back up at the hedgehog.

The completely baffled and confused look that Sonic had didn't come as a surprise, being well aware that he had asked similar questions before that left the hedgehog in perplexity. And yet, this time around he could see his eyes twitching – to anybody else he still looked confused, but to the experienced pick pocketer he could see the first signs of annoyance that appeared from the small twitch.

"What?" He asked firstly, shaking his head as if he was trying to decipher the question. "Why did I help you?"

Hearing his own question getting thrown back at him, made him realize that he had made somewhat of a mistake, opening his mouth to say something else but Sonic had already cut him off.

"Tails, you were bleeding out on the ground! Did you really expect me to just walk away?!" The pick pocketer's eyes were at work, reading his face rather than hearing his words, a whole wave of emotions passing by Sonic as he spoke.

Surprise, annoyance, before all that was left was worry. Pure and utter worry – he wasn't offended or mad, he was concerned. Their gazes were kept for long moments after that, the blue blur merely looking at Tails, emerald, green eyes darting around his face as if he were trying to analyze him. Perplexity started to mix in, as Sonic let out a quick sigh, scratched his quills, closing his eyes for a second before looking back.

"Listen. When are you going to let it through your thick head that this is not the street? You don't 'owe' anything to me," he let out a scoff, the annoyance returning from beforehand. "When are you going to realize that I want to be your friend?"

"So, you want me to realize that huh?" Tails questioned back, not liking the fact that he was being backed up to a corner like this, his eyes narrowed towards the hedgehog.

"You want me to realize that I need to trust you because you tell me to?" The fox crossed his arms over his chest to the best of his ability, the tip of his tails whipping. "That's not your decision to take."

"What have I done that makes you believe that you can't trust me?" Tails had a retort at the ready, having expected any kind of answer to his question but this one.

His mouth was left agape, cerulean orbs observing the hedgehog's face. The same worry and the same confusion were there, Sonic generally not understanding the fox's behavior.

"That doesn't matter," Tails muttered in a low voice, frowning into his lap. "What matters is that you had no reason to help me," this was said in a practical mumble, the fox mildly regretting his words, biting his lip as they had left his mouth.

A part of him had said it to make the hedgehog mad, since he knew how to fight anger than confusion. He wasn't dumb, he knew what Sonic was talking about, but he didn't want to be…He didn't want to be hurt.

He turned his head as the speedy blur let out a deep sigh, running a hand down his face, making him unable to read it.

"Tails," his name was said in the most serious and calculated tone he had ever heard the hedgehog speaking in.

He was still perplexed at that and managed to hold back his gasp of surprise when Sonic suddenly sat down on the edge of the bed, his expression having changed. Up close, he could make out the hedgehog's face perfectly, firstly looking at the crevices around his eyes as well as them being narrowed, categorizing the worry before he actually looked into his eyes.

The emerald, green irises were blazing, shining with a light he hadn't seen before, almost glowing right in front of him. They were piercing through his soul, practically yelling at the fox that whatever he was going to say now was anything but a lie.

"I had every reason to help you. You helped me through Croford, saved me in Kroxburg and saved me from getting stabbed. I don't owe anything to you, and you don't owe anything to me. I wanted to help you because I didn't want to see you dead," his voice was low in tone, keeping eye contact to the eight-year-old who could feel the words more than hear them.

He felt his fur stand on edge from the words, said in a calculated tone and radiated a kind of truthfulness he had never felt before.

"I want to see you be happy and live a good life. I want to be your friend because you deserve it. What happened in Croford is not your fault and what happened now is not your fault either. I saved you because you are worth it," he ended, the critical tone staying throughout, green eyes still fastened onto the pools of sapphire.

Tails own eyes hadn't even bothered to analyze, could both see, hear, and feel his words, being well aware that he meant every bit of it. He had never heard such words before, had never been reassured like this. He hadn't let anybody say anything the likes to him, hadn't let anybody inside because he had believed that he would never experience what it was like to be cared for.

Something that a young child had longed for, something that he had wanted in the darkest of nights in the alleyways, something that he had wished for. And yet, when he had the opportunity, he was afraid that it was going to slip through his fingers. The welcoming and warm grin that he had seen from this very hedgehog was something he had chosen to ignore. And yet, he could feel his throat closing without his own consent, his hands shaking in his lap.

Sonic kept his gaze, a small smile appearing on his lips before he suddenly leaned forward. The fox didn't have time to refuse or push him away, merely gasped as Sonic suddenly took his arms around him, pulling him into a hug.

He was slightly squeezed in the unexpected embrace, Tails merely remaining stiff, as Sonic moved his head slightly.

"It's okay kiddo. You're worth it," his words penetrated his entire mind, his soul and his being, the voice being much closer to his ear, making them even more clear.

Making it even more believable. His heart was racing, being unsure on what to do, eyes looking at nothing in front of him.

…

Something erupted in him, something that he had hidden away from himself and from anybody else around, something that he had yelled at himself to never do because there was no reason to. There was no use in doing it and there was no point, and yet he felt his throat close even more, his eyes beginning to sting.

Carefully, he moved his arms and hands around the hedgehog's back, avoiding the sharp quills that was there, before squeezing back. He had never hugged someone. He had never been in this close proximity to someone who he knew wouldn't hurt him or do him harm. The one Cream had given him as a goodbye was different from this, this was – protecting.

As all of that fell down, as the emotions, the realization and the lock that had been holding everything inside shattered, he dropped his head onto a blue shoulder. He took in a breath, and for the first time since he was very little - he sobbed.

A kind of sob that was thick and littered with horribleness, utter sadness that had engulfed a toddler into believing that the world was cruel and evil. A belief which he had stuck to, and yet, all of that seemed to shatter before him as he was allowed to remain. He felt the tears appear in his eyes, going down his muzzle as he sobbed, trying to catch his breath, and failed, his ears going into his skull as he just sat, quivering all over.

His fingers clambered around Sonic's back, holding on to the blue fur as he squeezed him, held on tight since he didn't want him to let go. He didn't want him to leave, and he didn't want him to forget him. No words left the young fox's mouth as he merely unleashed what he hadn't allowed himself to do, letting himself be vulnerable and become the little kid who he was inside.

Someone who only wanted somebody to take care of him, wanted to be there for him and wanted to comfort him when he needed it. Something he had longed for, and yet something he had tried to forget.

"Ssshh. It's okay," Sonic suddenly whispered, shushed and comforted at the same time, his hand suddenly starting to draw something on the yellow back which Tails didn't register, merely kept crying and kept sobbing, shaking, and quivering, saltwater tears making their way down his muzzle and onto the blue shoulder, letting out everything.

He listened to the quiet shushing, listened to the small words of comfort, different variations of 'it's okay, it's fine, I'm here,' that passed his ears. He barely registered the slow rocking, a slow movement from side to side that wasn't his doing, instead let himself sway with the motion. Letting himself completely break down, shatter on the ground, and become nothing but a cracked soul, crashing that wall he had put up, all that anger, all that frustration starting to slowly bleed out with the tears. All the distrust, all the lies he had been telling himself, used for his own protection completely disintegrated, became nothing but steam as droplets hit the bed, still holding on tight. As he was still being held, still being rocked slowly from side to side, he felt as Sonic's head moved a bit.

"I promise I will protect you," this was whispered again, a kind of promise which he thought he would never hear, one which he had never thought he would ever gain.

Not even if he had done a thousand deals back in Croford, not even if he had swiped millions of bottles of moonshine to the interested. And yet, here he was, getting the promise without him doing anything. But despite that, the rational part of him won, the seemingly only part of him which hadn't been broken on the floor.

"Don't promise something you can't keep," he said in between sobs, taking in a big breath after that, shoving his head deeper into the blue shoulder he had claimed as his comfort place. Despite the words that had left his mouth, he didn't want to believe them.

"Am I lying?" Sonic suddenly pulled back, albeit slowly, which made the fox loosen his grip a little bit, blinking the water out of his eyes as he looked at the hedgehog's face.

An utter warmth filled his stomach from what he saw, a wave of pure sympathy and nothing but welcoming smiles was all there were. No lie, no ill and no distrust. He swallowed something in his throat, letting out a sob as the tears still fell from his eyes.

"No," he managed to say in between, still looking at Sonic's eyes to try and find the lie that wasn't there.

A determined nod completely neglected the search, as the hedgehog's arms disappeared from his back.

"No, I'm not. Because I'm going to stay with you okay? I'm going to stay with you until you find somewhere safe where you can live. I promise," Tails had a hard time analyzing his face since Sonic's hands were on his face, a thumb from each hand wiping away the tears that sat on his muzzle and in his eyes, the action only confirming the promise further.

Despite what he had been taught, despite what he had learned from Espio and the Chaotix and despite his entire street morale – he trusted him. He trusted that he was saying the truth, didn't even want to read his face anymore. He just knew.

That alone, made the fox let out another sob, leaning forward again and landed on a blue shoulder, feeling the hedgehog's hands hug him once again, the kid shaking in his hold.

"Thank you," he breathed out, said with so much relief and so much joy that it was impossible to fake.

You didn't have to be an expert face or body reader to notice, you knew. He knew that Sonic meant it, and he knew that he was going to keep that promise. He wasn't going to leave him behind and he wasn't going to harm him. He knew.

Soon the rocking continued, the drawing on his back continued and the small whispering of nonsensical reassurance continued as well, merely let himself wallop around in the relief, letting himself cry the tears he had held back for so many years and let himself be who he wanted to be, quivering against the solid body of the other, feeling reassured in the hedgehog's grip.

He had no idea how long he remained, had no idea even if time had passed or he had disappeared into another limbo, had merely felt Sonic's body against his own, his heart beating and his embrace putting him into warmth. Something he hadn't known that he had needed – for a very, very long time.

He sobbed, and he cried, his face starting to feel itchy, his nose getting filled up as the tiredness started to settle, started to overwhelm him. He leaned into the rocking motion, letting it sway him from side to side, very slowly, felt for the drawings that the hedgehog made in his back, the childish part of his brain trying to decipher what he was drawing.

He came up with figures first, triangles, squares, and circles before he felt trees and bushes, a river and birds that reminded him off all the things which he wanted to keep and all the things which he wanted to enjoy. He didn't want to return to the street – he didn't want to keep being a criminal and he didn't want to continue the life he had endured for eight years. He wanted to change

How that was going to happen he didn't want to wonder about that now, instead didn't notice as his sobs started to slowly dim, as his mind relaxed and his body became heavy against Sonic. He felt whole, the broken and shattered soul that had been left on the floor was now pieced together again, pieced in a certain way that made him feel different.

There had been a sick ball, a dark purple and black ball of sorrow that had been rotting in his stomach, which now had been evaporated.

He felt light, and he felt relieved. Protected. With that in mind, he didn't know that he fell asleep in the hedgehog's arms, didn't know as he once again drifted off into a limbo which he didn't recognize. This was comforting, this was warm, and this was welcoming, something he hadn't felt before.

But he knew where it came from, feeling protected and cared for in the arms of someone he had neglected to be a friend because of the mere fear that he was going to turn around on him. But he wasn't going to.

All that he knew now, all that was left to know was one fact. One which he knew would change his life forever.

This was the moment when everything turns around.