In darkness I leave
For a place I've never seen
It's been calling out to me
That is where I should be - Lantern by Birds of Tokyo

Tsu met me back at home, Kai and a bottle in hand, "I was just about to give him dinner."

It was a milestone for him, he was getting his first taste of solid food, rice cereal. We were both anxious since he'd started complaining after every meal like he couldn't eat enough. I'd called Mom and consulted his pediatrician who'd recommended we try to introduce him to some new foods.

I held out my hands, and Tsu handed Kai and his bottle to me.

I took him to our feeding spot, and gave him a taste. Apparently he didn't mind it at all, and sucked contentedly.

"Wow," I watched him, "Look at him go."

"Ribbit," Tsu croaked with a smile, "So how did it go with Aizawa?"

I grabbed a rag to wipe Kai-chan's chin and to gain a moment to gather my thoughts. "It went about like Aizawa expected." I shook my head with a laugh, "Not as good for me. Todoroki and Bakugo were there, and they're stronger than ever."

"Of course, ribbit, you didn't expect anything different?" She waited for me to shake my head, "You'll get there. You have what it takes to be whatever you want, Ochaco." She stood, "I'm going to shower, and eat my own dinner." She leaned over Kai and gave him a kiss, "His hair is so red! I think it's getting brighter!"

"Maybe he has some kind of cool fire quirk!" I smiled at the baby, "Doesn't that sound awesome? Eat up, get big and strong!"

By the time Tsu rejoined us, I had finished reading to Kai, and Tsu grabbed him to give me time to eat my own dinner.

"Shoto and Bakugo were there?" She chirruped in her throat, "Shoto seems to be everywhere."

I groaned, "I know, and they're so sexy!" I ate a bite, "All of them! Oh, I am going to hell or something. Aizawa! Hot! I wished I had done a better showing."

Tsuyu giggled like she used to when we were in school, "If you think he's sexy, tell him." She croaked lightly, "You're both adults." She patted Kai-chan while she rocked him and he dozed on her shoulder. "I mean, look, you're all topsy hormone wise, and you feel like you did in high school. Go for it."

I buried my head in my hands, "Tsu! I could never, it's Aizawa-sensei." I blushed hotly. "Plus Bakugo and Todoroki!"

"They're single," she mused, "and so are you, if your baby-daddy hasn't shown up in the last two weeks."

"B-but!" I sputtered helplessly in the face of her straight talking logic. I'd always loved that about her, but now, I was confused and horny. I could only take one overwrought feeling at a time.

"And you said you can't remember anything. You must have enjoyed sex." She stroked Kaiden's soft hair, "You should try it again."

"I should tell Aizawa, Todoroki, and Bakugo that I think they look hot, and that I just about killed myself to impress them, and would you mind ever so much taking me to bed?"

"Think about your delivery. Ribbit" She laughed again, making Kai-chan stir, "Maybe pick one at a time. I don't think your.. second? Thirty-third? time should be a four-way."

"Thirty-third?" I laughed too, "My god, what did you think of me?"

She smiled over Kai's back, "Nothing bad. There are five missing years. It must have been nice. You had a personal life." Her tidal eyes closed, her dark lashes long on her cheeks, "I don't." She croaked softly, "Neither do they, or they're better at hiding it then I am at getting one."

I frowned, and thought about all those mixed feelings I'd had then that were right back with me. Most women heroes didn't have families. Or, if they did, were perpetually scared for them. I had a young girl's heart, a heart that had belonged to Midoriya. But it hadn't for at least a year, and I was betting that he'd told me something self-sacrificing and heroic when I'd left. What could I do but quietly let my love for him die?

"This is just so hard." Tsu regarded me again, "I remember being in love with Midoriya like it was yesterday, but I have a baby here that isn't his. I called all the men in my phone's contacts and none of them knew me that way. I'm starting to wonder if the next time I have sex if it will be my second time." I stood to put away my dinner dishes, "What kind of person was I? Mom and Dad tell me that Kai-chan is the product of love, that I'd said that a million times, but was it true, or was I placating them?"

"You would have kept something if he was gone. If he were alive, he'd be here to help you. Everyone loves you, Ochaco, don't ever doubt it!" Her croak was almost fierce, "It wasn't because you have a quirk. You're a beautiful person inside and out, don't ever forget it."

"I..." She said something that resonated with me. I kept everything even remotely personal. Back home, rather, back at Mom and Dad's, I have a box that was overflowing with odds and ends I'd gotten over the years. I didn't like throwing things out, and I didn't believe for a second that my 22 year old self did, either. "You might be right. I need to tear this place apart. I have something of his. I must."

"Not tonight." I glanced at her before standing, but ultimately just offered to take Kaiden.

"Hey, baby." I scooped him, holding him to my shoulder and cuddling him close, "Time for bed, okay?" I took him to his room and changed him into a fresh diaper and my favorite sleeper before kissing his forehead and laying him in his crib.

I closed the door and went back out to the living room. Tsu was picking up, "Forget about it for now." She raised a brow, "I'll pick up tomorrow."

Shoto

My eyes flickered open before my alarm went off, and I lay in bed feeling a syrupy sort of sleepiness. I had been looking forward to this day for weeks now. Waiting for Ochaco to awaken. Waiting for her to speak to me. Waiting, waiting, waiting for her to come to me.

I felt stupid, burying my face in my hands, as I felt a quaver run though me. I had missed her. More than I dreamed. Finishing school, fighting real life villains, becoming a hero in my own right. I, of all our classmates, had kept the promise I could not speak back then. I had done it all for her and had forgotten why.

Five years had passed in unhappy solitude and I dared not to name it. I'd turned down men and women, even a shapechanger who would have been anyone I wanted for a night. I'd given myself to a woman I thought loved me. Another who'd told me she could chase the sadness from my eyes. She hadn't succeeded. I stopped trying.

The alarm buzzed and I tapped it, silently thanking it for jolting me out of those melancholy thoughts. Which was for the better, since I was going to be spending the next few weeks with Ochaco, helping her adapt to the new hero laws and hopefully refining her technique. I stopped in my tracks, oh god, I sound like a teacher. I so didn't want to be that to her.

I hurried through my morning rituals and dressed just enough to run down to grab breakfast. Since Ochaco would be here later, we could both use the locker rooms to costume up before I gave her a tour of the private areas and the workspace of the agency. Just the thought of spending the whole day at her side gave me a giddy feeling.

The Endeavor agency is more than office space and a private gym. There's an impressive penthouse floor with six apartments for the heroes to use while they're on duty. I lived here most of the time, since it was free and my life basically revolves around the work I do. Katsuki stepped out of his room at the same time and as we headed to the elevator, I heard another door open and turned to watch Burnin' slam her door and run up to meet us.

"You got your intern showing up? That Uraraka whatever?" She yawned, shoving a fist into her mouth, and her hair trailed behind in flickering lime-colored flames.

"Uravity," I corrected and Bakugo gave a snide laugh. "What?"

"Uravity," he deadpanned and I frowned, "It's Ochaco-chan, isn't it?"

I felt a blush climb my neck. I looked at Moe, and she grinned, flashing her saw-like teeth at us. I coughed and Bakugo laughed before I could choke out, "It's Ochaco Uraraka. Her hero name is Uravity. That's all."

"Whatever. Will you get her to come up and clean my room?" Moe doubled over laughing, "Man, Bakugo, your intern nearly died. He didn't like doing the grunt work."

Bakugo laughed too, but I scowled, "No. She's here to learn how to be a hero. She's not some wet-behind-the-ears newbie fresh off Shiketsu's campus."

"C'mon," Bakugo chided me as Moe held the doors open for us, "I know what she's here for."

I rode the elevator in silence, listening to Katsuki and Moe talk about the patrol schedule. They were going out to other wards, but Ochaco and I would be walking the busy, albeit safe, streets around the agency. The likelihood of action was small. The doors opened, and I caught Bakugo's elbow, holding him while Moe walked out into our private kitchen.

Doors closed again, "What?" He shook me off with a scowl, though there was no heat in it. Just Katsuki.

I took a deep breath, "I'm nervous, okay? You're right, are you happy?"

"I fuckin' knew it. She's hot." Bakugo did not smile, and his face was perfectly serious. "And her kid is cute, but do you want to saddle yourself with that?"

"I hadn't thought that far ahead." I had. I just couldn't say it aloud.

He gave me a tight nod, "It's a family." His bright red eyes blazed, "Think about it. If you hurt them, I will never forgive you. You will never forgive yourself. If Midoriya finds out…"

"He didn't even come to the hospital." I breathed a noisy sigh, then slapped the door open button, "If he has anything to say about it I'll hit him so hard that the first One for All will feel it."

"That's the spirit." Bakugo trailed behind me, "She's always been different, you know?" I folded my arms, and turned to watch him as his gaze turned inward. "She is just the same as she was, but we've changed. You'd do well to remember that."

I knew that. Those five years after she'd left had been full of lessons. Most notably what family meant to me. I filled a plate with our chef's breakfast noodles, a stir-fried dish filled with pork and scallions. I put it down and continued my line of thought. Is that why I felt so drawn to her? She had a ready made-family that I still, regrettably, felt the lack of?

I twisted a large bite with my chopsticks and chewed slowly. I was in love with her. It hit me, like a rogue wave. I thought it was a school-boy's crush. Do those last for six years? What in the world had made me so stupid way back when I was 15? When I first saw her float free as thought. When she had to leave, why had I not done anything then?

The answer was simple. I continued eating, watching the clock press on to when I would need to meet her. She'd been in love with Midoriya. It was obvious to everyone. Even Midoriya had known, and harbored his own awkward teen crush. I valued Izuku too much to do anything then. I shook my head, snorting lightly, and I'd been even more awkwardly repressed than I am now.

I scraped the rest of my breakfast together and picked as much as I could off the plate before getting up to put away the dishes. It was still early, but I felt the need to blow off at least a little of this restlessness. I rode the elevator to the lobby and walked out the front doors into the cool, yet sunny morning. Just in time to see Ochaco jog by with a stroller.

She laughed, and veered to meet me while I stood with a happy smile that came out of nowhere. All my melancholy thoughts, misgivings, and confusion evaporated like morning mist.

"Ochaco!" I smiled into Kaiden's stroller, "And Kai-chan! Sorry! Kaiden-chan."

"You can call him that." She gave me a warm smile, "I have to get him to daycare, though. Want to come?"

I was wearing one of the band shirts that Kyoka had given to everyone when her dad went on tour in third year and sweatpants that didn't clear my ankles. I looked at my feet, rubber-soled slippers. I gave her the only answer I could.

"Sure." I paused by Kai's stroller, the urge to cuddle him was overwhelming. "Can I carry him?"

"Oh," Ochaco tilted her head, "That's fine, but it's not far. I can easily keep pushing him."

I ignored her, and spotting the buckles holding him in, I unlocked him. He smiled, his pink lips shining and he blew a raspberry at me which made me laugh. I cuddled him close, "Hey, remember me?"

"We'd better get to dropping him off. I'm a little nervous, I used to take him to work with me."

I ambled by her side, "The shop needs a place for him," I mused.

"I thought about that. I mean, you know, paying for daycare is expensive, and being an unpaid intern kinda stinks. But I would just wither and die if anything happened because I didn't want to keep him safe from our life."

I patted Kai, and smiled at him, though I was rewarded with a slobbery hair pull. "I discussed that with Dad. If you and I are caught in action, you get one third of whatever the payout is. The government still needs us, and any hero that got recertified last year got a pay bump." I glanced at her, "I'll help with the cost of daycare."

She stumbled to a stop, "Shoto, I could never ask…"

"You don't need to, I'm offering. The ranks don't work the same as they used to, but I'm pretty popular, and the hero commission compensates me well. I get paid for TV and podcasts, too." I cut my eyes toward her, and her cheeks were a fiery pink, "I'm just saying I can help. That's all."

Ochaco resumed walking, "No. I'm responsible for Kaiden's well-being. Whatever the cost!" She seemed angry, though I didn't know what I'd done to upset her. She paused outside an office building with an extremely bright, happy corner that proclaimed that child care was within. She impatiently held her arms out for Kaiden, and I handed him over at the cost of a few hairs.

"I'll be right back." Her words were still tinted with emotion.

AN/ Don't give up! Keep trying, no matter how hard things get. Shonen anime and manga has taught me so many lessons, but in writing, these are the ones that always stand out most. My second best lesson learned from watching anime is never forget the ones who stand with you. In this case, it's Mosevic, my nakama. Thank you for not giving up.

As ever, please comment! I read each and every one!