Summary:
Soon after their long awaited reunion, Levi and Mikasa find refuge in the house of a new Marleyan ally — the head of the Strauss family — who holds hidden stories of their own. What secrets do they know?
"Is this it?" Mikasa pointed forward at the end of the path ahead.
"Must be." Levi lowered the paper map from his and Mikasa's face as they both peered towards the tall height of a pillared Strauss estate standing in the middle of the lush plantation. It was three-stories high, painted in white, and the pillars created a sense of grandeur. Anyone who saw it would immediately know the status and wealth of the family that lived here. The two undercover soldiers marched forward.
It hadn't been too long since Levi and Mikasa had reunited on the edge of the Marleyan town that night. The moments that immediately followed the emotional exchange were quiet, but intimate, and the two knew there were plenty of words that were simply chosen to be left unspoken.
Mikasa remembered pulling away from Levi's soft kiss on her forehead, and as flustered as any woman would be, she resorted to nervous laughter and shy distance. She dusted off her clothes and continued wiping her face with the sleeves of her kimono. She still hadn't looked Levi in the eyes since then, and if she stopped to think about it too much, Mikasa would continue falling into a hole of blushing embarrassment.
Levi took notice of this. He didn't mean to make her uncomfortable. As far as he was concerned, it was maybe selfish of him to kiss the woman, his comrade, like that. But there was something about that moment; seeing her again after tireless hours of wandering the city following a risky journey on the only Hizuran plane left that seemed too old and dingy. I am not fucking dying yet until I see her again, he remembered thinking on the turbulent flight. He was lucky to land safely in that shitty thing.
When he followed familiar paths and finally found Mikasa on the outskirts of town, wailing to herself on the cold ground, Levi felt as though his heart could burst. She was alone, of course, but more than anything he knew she felt alone. It was exactly what he knew would happen. Levi wasn't worried about her safety — again and again, the girl was strong enough to handle her own. But this...
This is what he wanted to avoid. This was why he made his promise to her.
As they reunited after less than two days that felt like an agonizing eternity, and as he pulled away from the warm embrace and kissed her forehead, he simply couldn't help it. Mikasa Ackerman was in front of his own eyes again. Mikasa Ackerman was in his arms again.
But maybe he did too much, he thought. As they walked towards the Strauss estate, he glanced over at Mikasa who still refused to meet his eyes. Mikasa still seemed nervous and shy, and if she didn't welcome that touch, he knew it was best to keep loving her from afar as planned. Levi was well accustomed to protecting her well being, but now the journey meant learning to protect the woman's heart, too.
Perhaps he would be okay if Mikasa never loved him back.
They both stood before the doorway of the estate now. It was well into the night and the entire property seemed extremely quiet, though the lights in the house were still on. Levi stepped forward and made three loud strikes of the brushed bronze door knocker; each hit boomed loud into the home.
A few moments passed. Still no answer.
Mikasa looked to Levi; the first time since the embrace that she'd made eye contact with him. "Maybe no one's home…?"
Levi shrugged. "An establishment like this should have butlers rushing to the door at every hour. We've seen a lot of this in Stohess. Plus, the lights are on." Impatient and tired, he knocked three more times aggressively, and he admitted Mikasa's startled face was a little amusing.
"Hmm, I didn't expect any late night visitors."
They jumped, not expecting the sultry voice of a woman coming from way up above them. For a second Levi stopped to realize he'd mistakenly mentioned a place on the island like Stohess aloud. Both Levi and Mikasa's eyes peered up to a female with beautiful wavy red hair, dressed in a black garment over a white blouse that fell over her shoulders. The woman was perched atop the third-story balcony hovering above them. She flickered a lit match beneath a fresh cigarette, and the warm light of the spark revealed her bright golden eyes staring down at them.
"Ah—umm—Lady Kiyomi of Hizuru sent us to the Strauss family. Are we at the right place?" Mikasa took a few steps back to have a clearer view of who she was speaking to.
The redhead stared intensely at the two visitors as she puffed another gray cloud of smoke into the air. "There is no Strauss family. It's just me. One Strauss." She finally smiled. "Name's Carmen."
"Hah... You live alone in this big-ass house?" Mikasa swiftly elbowed Levi's back at his response. He shot his eyes at his soldier and shrugged again, whispering a what? in her direction, then rubbed the now painful spot on his back.
Carmen threw her head back in a laugh, exposing her long neck before leaning forward on the balcony railing. "I've got a story or two. What about you — what's yours?" She tapped the cigarette butt of its ash.
The two subtly glanced at each other, realizing they hadn't gotten far enough as to discuss their undercover story. Levi looked back up to the woman, but was interrupted as he tried to speak.
"I've heard plenty of stories from lots of different people. A lot of it is boring. But you..." Carmen leaned even closer over the balcony now, scrutinizing Levi up and down, then the same to Mikasa. "Let me guess... Typical rich man finds a geisha and now... Pregnant?"
An entertained Carmen could see the hysterical flush of red on their faces even through the dark. Mikasa scoffed and crossed her arms, a look of disbelief plastered onto her face. "I—We haven't— There's no—"
"Eloping." Levi stepped in front of Mikasa and took over the chaotic introduction, projecting his voice now. His face was still burning up as he fought his own flustered thoughts, and he cleared his throat again. "We're eloping. We traveled together from Hizuru to marry and start life here. We were told you could help house us as we figure things out... And we have nowhere to go."
She held the cigarette in between two fingers and lowered in her hands again, her eyes still studying them from above. "Married, huh?" Carmen paused to take a peek at Levi's handsome features, her sheepish eyes checking out his hidden toned build. "Well, isn't that a bummer." She spun around on the balcony to walk into the house again.
A baffled Levi noticed the interaction but looked away and turned to Mikasa, whose face was still red thinking about being married to her captain. Carmen had gone into the house without another word, and he took the brisk moment to reach for Mikasa's hand. He told himself he wouldn't make Mikasa uncomfortable, but if they were supposedly marrying each other in Marley, it needed to be realistic, and Mikasa understood. But if she wasn't already flustered to her limits before, this topped the cake.
Finally, the door unbolted and swung open. Carmen stood before them, smelling strongly of the smoke from the balcony. She was a starkly beautiful woman; her wavy red hair glowed with the light coming from inside of the estate, her amber eyes were large and piercing, freckles graced her sun-kissed skin, and her damn breasts almost seemed to burst through her shirt. Mikasa coughed and quickly glanced down at her own chest, suddenly feeling slightly insecure at that moment.
Levi blinked for a second at the woman and swallowed. She was admittedly an attractive woman — no sane man could deny that — but that wasn't why he was fixated on her features. Carmen reminded him strongly of someone, and as his blue eyes narrowed at her, he couldn't quite put his memory together. There was something strangely too familiar about her.
Mikasa looked over again at Levi, whose male eyes were entirely glued to the woman in front of them. Mikasa slipped her hand away from his, and couldn't explain why she felt so irritated.
"You look even more handsome up close, dontcha?" Carmen smiled at Levi, still not giving a single look to Mikasa. "Well? Come on in." Carmen turned and walked deeper into the home, leading the way.
"I have close ties with Kiyomi, you know. That granny is fun." She led them past the wrap-around stairs and into a hall of the large house. "Greedy, but a damn good businesswoman. Learned a lot from her." Both walls were lined with two finely decorated doors to different rooms on each side. Levi and Mikasa continued following behind her, looking curiously around at the beautiful residence.
"You asked if I live here alone, right? I do, and I don't. I house a lot of passerby's and sojourners here. Like I said, they all have different stories. Always fascinating." A set of keys were pulled from Carmen's pockets as she unlocked a room at the end. "But I'm a sucker for anyone trying to escape their shit lives and start afresh. Someone did that for me once. That's how I ended up here." The lock clicked before she twisted the bronze handle, unlatching the door.
The door swung open, and the light of the hallway revealed an impressively large room; much larger than what the Scouts were given even in headquarters. The floors were a decorative red carpet, a woodfire stove perched to the right of an emerald green velvet loveseat with golden tassels hanging on each corner. To the left side of the room was a large bookshelf filled with novels upon novels that looked to be even older than the walls of Paradis. Beautiful oil paintings and a gold-framed mirror hung on the french-panel walls, and an elaborate candle chandelier dangled in the center of the tall ceilings. Levi and Mikasa turned at the same time to the right and...
A single bed.
The captain lifted a hand up to the back of his neck, scratching at his growing undercut nervously. He didn't even dare look at Mikasa.
"Most people find their own way within a couple of weeks. But you both can stay as long as you need — the least I can do for Granny Kiyomi. Lemme know if you need anything." Carmen dangled the metal key in front of Levi's face before dropping it into his hands and leaning closely. She spoke low in his ear. "Probably not exactly the honeymoon suite you were hoping for, but I'm sure you'll still have lots of fun." She pulled away and winked at the two before leaving, noticing a clearly irate Mikasa. "'Night, lovebirds." Carmen walked away with a sway in her hips.
The awkward silence as they entered the shared room was so damn painful. Neither Levi nor Mikasa uttered a single word, and they kept more distance between each other than was necessary. The two comrades had been on plenty of missions together overnight, but it was always accompanied by Connie's snores in the twilight, Jean and Eren bickering over the campfire, the sounds of Sasha or Hange cooking soup. There was always something else, someone else. But being alone in the night was different.
Levi needed something to do to occupy his damn mind. He walked over to the woodfire stove and began to toss three large logs of birch in, fixing them into a strategic pile for optimal fire building. He finally found courage to glimpse at Mikasa, who was facing the walls and fixated on the details of the oil paintings. Her fingers traced across the hundreds of dusty books on the shelving.
Levi struck a spark from a matchbox he'd found beside the woodpile and threw it into the fireplace. He sat on the floor watching the pile burn brighter with each second, and noticed the blaze illuminating the room drastically. The satisfying crackling of the logs was the only sound that could be heard in the night. He continued to watch Mikasa in a gaze, regarding her dainty fingers that brushed her sheen black hair behind her ear to reveal her pale profile, and—wait, is she blushing? Levi immediately broke into a sweat, and not because he was sitting in front of the burning flames. He let out a loud sigh and cleared his throat to ease the tension in his lungs.
"...D-did you say something?" Mikasa turned around and awkwardly stared at Levi. She was fiddling with her hands.
"Huh? Oh. No, I didn't. Did you?" Dammit Levi, you're a dumbass right now.
"No. Sorry."
"You don't have to say sorry."
"Right… Sorry." Dammit Mikasa, you're a dumbass right now.
…
…
"Umm, I—" Both Mikasa and Levi spoke at the same time and paused, now gawking at each other with wide eyes and raised brows. Mikasa took a step backwards and clumsily slammed against the now rattling bookshelf, to which she nervously tried to push the displaced books back into position as she stuttered. "Um... You go first."
"You… The bed."
"C-Captain…!"
Levi threw a palm to his forehead and couldn't take the awkwardness anymore. "What I meant… is that you can take the bed." He pointed towards the bed frame while he continued stoking the fire. He refused to look at her.
Mikasa let out a deep breath. "Where will you sleep, then?" She finally stepped away from the walls of the room and inched towards the fireplace where Levi still was. Levi could tell in his peripheral vision that she was still nervously playing with her hands.
"Chair looks pretty comfortable. Or the grass outside. Whatever you prefer."
At long last, Mikasa's chuckle eased the atmosphere. "You can take the grass, then." She crossed the room and sat beside Levi amongst the heat of the fire, her hands and fingers outspread in front of herself to feel the warmth of the flames. Levi was relieved to see Mikasa seemingly relaxed again. For a moment, he began to relax too, until he was suddenly aware of how closely they were sitting alone in that room at night.
She lowered her arms into her lap. "Levi, thank you again... For finding me." Mikasa turned a gentle head towards Levi, a soft smile graced her face, then turned to the fire again. "It was…" She stared at her hands and gripped the fabric beneath her palms. "It was so hard not being together. I'm sorry."
"We're together again, aren't we?"
Together.
The word warmed her soul. Mikasa realized Levi's promise to stay with her meant they would stay together. She wanted that. She wanted that so much.
Levi met eyes with Mikasa. The dancing of the fire flickered in her gray stare and the warm light of the embers made her glow as usual in Levi's eyes; the same way she always glowed even in the moonlight, like a cosmo in the dark sky. Not that he'd ever forgotten, but Levi was heavily reminded that this was the woman he was in love with. This was the woman he'd crossed the world to stay with, and who he'd do it all over again for if she wanted. This was the woman who made a patient soldier of a man like Captain Levi go batshit crazy when she was apart from him for just less than two damn days.
There was absolutely nothing that could compare to this moment, staring into the eyes of Mikasa Ackerman.
She saw something familiar in Levi's cerulean eyes again. It was that same intense gaze from the night she knocked on his door in Hizuru. There was a deep wanting, a longing, an unbearable desire that shouted from his eyes as his pupils dilated at her, glancing all over her features as his breath got heavier. His parted lips didn't smile at her; he was too lost in the enchanted stare that seemed to be unbreakable.
Mikasa didn't know what she was doing when she moved closer to him now, eyes still connected to his. There was no explanation for the way she slowly reached her hand to touch his face, tracing his jawline; he was hot to the touch, and the sweat on his forehead dripped down now. She placed her palm against his cheek and slowly brushed her delicate thumb across his bottom lip; Levi nimbly reached to grasp her hand before planting a soft kiss on her wrist, then another, closing his eyes as he did so. He lingered there, caressing her soft skin; and she could hear him breathing heavily now as he lured her closer to himself by the hand. Mikasa's heart felt as if it would burst and her breaths began to falter. The fire was beginning to dim and weaken.
Her hand lay on his chest, attracted like a magnet; he led her trembling fingers above his heart and she could feel the heavy pounding beneath his toned muscles. She inched her body closer, slowly rising to her knees as she hovered closely above him now. His strong hands fell into the smalls of her waist as he looked up at her, steadily blinking. She had her hands clasped behind his neck now, his dark hair brushing against her and smelling of pine and mint.
"Mikasa..." Levi's voice was low and breathy, and the sound of her name on his tongue sent a shiver down the depths of her entire longing body. His tempting eyes and lingering hands traced the outline of her slender figure in his grasp, stroking the fabric of the sash that held her kimono wrapped around her bare body. Levi paused.
"Mikasa… Is this what you want?"
She couldn't hold back any longer. The woman held his desperate face in her secure hands, demanding his stare once again as she bit her lip. Levi saw the pupils of her eyes pulsating from something tender to something passionate, eager and absolutely feral. Mikasa was panting now, the air in her lungs felt hot, and her body twitched at the thought of what was to come.
As she looked into his eyes, her swollen red lips parted as she breathed a lowly whisper.
"Yes."
Their eyes remained completely locked onto each other as they began to move closer together in sync, the pace picking up now. Mikasa's shoulders began to rise and fall with her breaths as Levi slowly untied her sash with one hand, the kimono loosening and unfurling around her body now. The air felt cool against the sweat that covered what was exposed of her porcelain skin. Silk sleeves began to slip off of her arms, showcasing the pink flush of her pale shoulders. Mikasa moved to unbutton Levi's shirt, revealing his scarred chest that her touch couldn't resist. Her sash unraveled in his hands and fell to the ground beneath them; her slack kimono revealed the length of her slender legs surrounding him. She felt the hungry touch of Levi's hand venturing beneath her clothing, grasping onto the back of her thighs. There was much more of Mikasa that she ached for him to explore.
He looked up at her again. Levi's orbs dilated, attempting to etch every single detail of this captivating image of the woman he loves into the most permanent and precious corners of his memory; the way she moved, the way she breathed, the way she stared into his soul. He breathed in the moment of Mikasa Ackerman wanting a shitty man like himself even for a moment, even for this tireless night. His rough fingers traced the depth of her collarbones, then downwards, a hand lingering just above her breasts before rising again to her sweltering neck. Mikasa crawled up to Levi, placing her center onto his aching pelvis as he pulled her in closer, caressing her the length of her smooth legs, and throbbing as she stirred atop him.
His eager hand traveled her thigh higher and higher, both panting even heavier. His nose was grazing her chest now, where he planted a fervent kiss on the top edge of her breasts, then again on her collarbone, her shoulder, then the length of her neck; she felt his wet tongue moving atop her skin between each kiss. The feeling was new to her, and the moan that escaped her lips was completely unknown to Mikasa Ackerman.
Levi's face was near hers once again; he watched Mikasa's eyes slowly shut as he drew her closer, lips hovering above each others' now, ready to crash his desperate lips onto hers now. His indigo eyes shut closed as he leaned in.
The nightmare of the raven-haired woman and the blood on his hands flashed in his mind.
Levi's eyes shot open in fright, a gasp escaping his lips that almost touched hers, and he fell backwards from Mikasa. His sweaty palms planted onto the floor beneath him. He stood quickly in shock, shaking his head and unable to look at Mikasa.
"I... can't."
Levi stepped backwards from the abandoned woman, and grabbed his jacket before bolting out the door, closing it behind him.
Mikasa didn't even have a chance to call out his name. The fire died down, and a stunned Mikasa clutched her clothing to her chest.
Levi stood outside the estate now, both hands clutched atop the hair on his head. Shit. Shit. Shit. He was angry. Angry at himself for letting it get too far. I can't do this. Not to Mikasa. He'd realized it was getting harder and harder to love her from afar as he had planned. But when did anything ever go as planned with Mikasa Ackerman? The troubled man began pacing back and forth, trying to breathe in the cold air of the night.
"You're up late."
Levi turned behind him. Carmen emerged from the main door entrance, another cigarette in hand and ready to light. She was in a short red nightgown that fell mid-thigh, and her bare legs and feet told him more than was necessary to know. She approached, tossing him a small matchbox. Levi let out a tch as he struck a flame for her, bringing the fresh nicotine alight for her. She lowered her face and covered her cigarette with her hand, blocking the wind so as to allow it to properly catch flame.
Carmen's radiating golden eyes shot up to Levi's, noticing his hitched breaths and unbuttoned shirt soaked with sweat. Then she glanced down at what was shown in his trousers. "Someone seems hot and bothered." She was sultry and seductive as she bit her lips and smirked. "Did you have fun already?"
"No." Levi was sharp and abrupt with her, ignoring the look in her eyes and turning away, still in the chaos of his mind over Mikasa.
"Oh?" Carmen walked around him now to fall into his line of view. The thin fabric of her nightgown was loosened, and the opening of the clothing revealed her cleavage. She leaned forward close to Levi, who stepped back from her as she exposed even more of her breasts to him. "You want to have some fun with me instead?" She slyly tossed her cigarette over her shoulder and slithered both hands onto him, pulling him close by the collar and whispering seductively into his ear. "If you do, Captain Levi, I'll tell you all I know about Eren Jaeger."
Mikasa finally caught her breath in the room, but the stun in her eyes couldn't fade. Not yet. She was vulnerable. Absolutely vulnerable. She knew exactly what she wanted and... Did Levi not want the same? Did he not want her? Did she read that wrong?
Fuck... She was absolutely petrified and embarrassed. The thought of Levi walking out on her and rejecting her was a new kind of pain.
But the flame of his indigo eyes as he locked onto her, the way he touched her, the way he kissed her skin told her a completely different story.
Mikasa re-tied the sash and rolled the sleeves of her kimono back onto herself before darting out the door. She ran down the hallway, past each door, past the wrap-around staircases, then the entrance. The front door was already cracked open.
Levi.
She bolted, her hand reaching for the handle, til she was stopped by the muffled sounds of Levi and Carmen's voices. She snuck closer and put an ear to the door.
"You want to have some fun with me instead?"
Mikasa peeked out of the crack of the door and saw the back of Levi's head, and Carmen, her nightgown practically open and exposed in front of Levi. The red-haired woman leaned forward to him, her hands all over him now. Mikasa jolted backwards, taking ten steps back before shaking her head in disbelief.
Her heart broke.
She was disgusted. Furious. Fucking appalled. How could Levi run away from what happened — what almost happened — between them, then try to sleep with that woman right after? Mikasa ran back to the room, absolutely distraught.
I don't want any of this.
How dare he look at me with those eyes and pretend he wants me.
He doesn't want me.
"If you do, Captain Levi, I'll tell you all I know about Eren Jaeger."
Levi's eyes widened open to her, staring at Carmen for a moment before shoving her away with much more force than he intended. She snickered. He took another step back away from her, creating even more distance. "How do you know me? What do you know?" His eyes shot back to the house as he thought of Mikasa still inside, worrying if she was safe.
"Carmen… Who are you?"
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
HOLY CRAP. This was so fun to write. A little painful, but SOOOOO fun.
First off, Carmen! I can't say too much about her character yet (that will be revealed in the next chapter) but just know she's gonna play a big role here in this story. All you need to know is that she is an insane, resourceful genius of a businesswoman...
MOVING ON. Things are getting spiiiiicy between Levi and Mikasa. After being apart and both sides realizing how desperate they are for each others' touch and presence, it is becoming reeeeeally tough for the both of them to keep the emotional and physical distance. They're freakin' in LOVE. They just don't recognize it from each other just yet.
P.S. Levi asking Mikasa before proceeding... Remember, friends: consent is sexy :-)
Levi is still haunted by his dreams. He still fears something bad will happen to Mikasa if he really expresses his love to her (in all the ways... hehehe)
Poor Mikasa :( Levi's been beaten up the past few chapters and now it's kinda her turn lol oops... She already felt insecure compared to Carmen, but even more so now that she thinks Levi is going to sleep with her or wants Carmen more than Mikasa.
I did a good ol' cliffhanger at the end... What does Carmen know?! WHO IS SHE
Let me know what y'all think so far! Your comments give me such joy :') Please keep looking forward to the next part!