Disclaimer: Naruto is property of Masashi Kishimoto, not me. However, Kosu and Hiro are mine. Warning, possible themes of a dark, violent or suggestive nature and use of mature language as the story progresses… They're ninja after all.

Chapter 11

Growing Pains

Kosu inhaled deeply, dark rimmed eyes stared at Hiriko's office door. She hadn't slept at all, unwilling to take her eyes from Hiro as he slept. This is for Hiro. She tapped her knuckles against the door.

"Come in."

Kosu's fingers twitched as she fought the temptation to run back upstairs to Hiro. This is for Hiro. She repeated and slowly entered the office, closing the door softly behind her.

"Kosuke." Hiriko blinked in surprise, straightening in the seat behind her desk. She fell silent under Kosu's intense gaze. A shiver ran down Hiriko's spine as Kosu took her time slowly eyeing the elder woman up and down.

"I've been thinking on what you said." Kosu said eventually. "How would you care for Hiro?"

"You mean you'll-"

"How would you care for him?" Kosu narrowed her eyes.

"R-right." Hiriko stammered. "Well, he'd move into the main building to start with. He'd be on the corridor with the other boys around his age. We'll provide all of his food, clothing and schooling." Kosu's brow relaxed slightly. School… She hadn't even thought that far. "We have at least 5 members of staff here during the day, but you've seen yourself it's often more. He'll always have someone here." Hiriko continued to rattle on. He won't be left alone.

"That's enough." Kosu said quietly, interrupting Hiriko. The grey-haired woman snapped her mouth shut and watched Kosu tentatively. "Have you got room for him now?" Hiriko's jaw slackened and she managed a shaky nod.

"Yes." She all but whispered. Kosu inhaled slowly. This was for the best. "I can have it ready by this evening." Hiriko offered, her aged eyes regarded Kosu gently. The Kosu's throat seemed to thicken and she managed to nod.

"I've not told Hiro yet." Kosu admitted, her brow pinching. "I'll tell him now… He… He won't take this well… He'll…" Her sharp grey eyes darted to pin Hiriko where she stood. "He will need the comfort you've been giving him."

The air in the office seemed to thicken tenfold. Hiriko's heart rattled behind her ribs and despite everything that her gut screamed at her, she found it impossible to look away from Kosu.

"Understand this Hiriko-san, I am entrusting you with the most important person to me. There is no version of this where Hiro doesn't get the care, love and protection that he deserves." Metallic eyes bore into Hiriko, her mouth ran dry.

"O-of course." She nodded shakily.

Neither of them moved, Hiriko barely even dared to breath. Finally, Kosu's brow relaxed and she breezed from the room. The door snapped closed and the air thinned. Hiriko exhaled heavily and placed a hand to her forehead as she collapsed onto her chair. That sheer presence.

Kosu walked through the main entrance hall of the orphanage.

This was the best for Hiro.

She climbed the stairs, her chest growing heavier with each step.

This was the best for Hiro.

Her hand hovered on the door to their apartment.

This was the best for Hiro.

She raised her chin, rearranging her features into a mask of confidence and surety. Slowly, she entered the apartment. The weight on her chest threatened to crush her where she stood. Hiro was sat, oblivious and content at the table, happily munching on his breakfast. His head perked up as Kosu closed the door behind her.

"Kosu!" He chirped, eyebrows rising in pleasant surprise. "I thought you had already left for the academy?"

"No, I went to speak to Hiriko-san." Kosu said quietly. Her whole body numbed as she neared Hiro and crouched before him.

"You know you can just call her Hiriko." Hiro chuckled. Kosu smiled sadly. It would be a while before she heard that laugh again. "What did you need her for?" Kosu inhaled deeply and took Hiro's hands in her own.

He turned so that he was fully facing her. His brow pinched together and his hands shook slightly beneath hers. Oh Kami. She exhaled slowly.

"Hiro-"

"I don't want to leave Konoha." He blurted suddenly. Kosu's eyes widened. "I-I don't want to go back out there." His little hands clenched hers, his white eyes wide and panicked. "… This is home… I know what that is now." He murmured.

Kosu's brow softened and she raised her hand to cup his jaw, running her hand over his rosy cheek. It was the right thing to do.

"We're not leaving Konoha." She assured him. Hiro's grip on her slowly loosened. "Like you said, this is your home now." She released his cheek. "I went to see Hiriko-san to talk about your care. Hiro you are so special and precious to me, you deserve the best… I've arranged for you to move into the main building and be cared for by Hiriko-san." Kosu brought her gaze from her hands back to Hiro's face. She could only watch as he fell completely still in front of her, eyes wide and jaw slack. "Hiro?"

"You're leaving me." He whispered on a shaky exhale.

"Hiro-"

"You lied!" He roared. Kosu froze, her muscles locked as her entire body turned to ice. "You said- You said we would always be together! That you would always be there!" Hiro snatched his hands from her, tears brimming in his eyes. His chest shook as he sucked in rapid, shaky breaths. "You can't leave me!" He cried. He snatched onto her shirt, balling the material in his fist.

Kosu clenched her jaw, ignoring the burn of brimming tears on the lids of her eyes. She wrapped her hand over Hiro's.

"You can't!" His voice cracked. "You can't."

"Hiro, I can't be everything that you need anymore." She gripped his hand tightly. "The orphanage can." She ran her thumb over his blotchy cheeks to wipe his torrent of tears.

"I don't want you to go." He whimpered.

"I'm not going. I'll still be here." She assured him.

"Then let me stay with you!"

"Hiriko-san can take better care of you." Her stomach curled as she admitted it out loud.

"But I want you."

"Hiro… I can't…" Her voice shook as she tried to stop it from breaking. The centre of her chest seemed to explode, the icy hot shrapnel spreading throughout her entire body as she pried Kosu's fist from her and stood.

"Kosu!" He cried as she stepped away from him. Do it… She had to do it.

"This is for the best Hiro… " She closed her eyes, a silent tear slipping down her cheek. He'll realise that eventually.

A knock sounded at the apartment door. Hiriko-san. She wiped the tear from her cheek "That'll be Hiriko-san." She said.

"Kosu…" Hiro's voice stopped her from pulling the door open. "Please."

"Hiro, I…" I'm so sorry. She pulled open the door. Kosu looked up to Hiriko who forced a weak smile to her face, glancing over Kosu to Hiro.

"I've come to help you move Hiro. You're going to love-"

"Kosu!" Hiro yelled over Hiriko, shocking the older woman. "Don't make me go. Please!" Hiro's little fist clenched at his sides, panic rising in his chest.

"This is how it has to be Hiro." Kosu's brow pinched in pain. "It's for the-"

"I won't ever forgive you for this." Hiro's fists shook. Kosu winced as if his words had struck her. Hiriko tried to place a supportive hand on Kosu's shoulder but Kosu quickly slapped it away as her eyes remained fixed on Hiro.

"Hiriko-san, would you show Hiro to his new room. I can start moving his things." Kosu said quietly.

"No!" Hiro ran at Kosu, pushing hard on her stomach. His tiny balled fists hit at her with all his might. "No! No! No!" Kosu stood, taking strikes. "Kosuke!" He pushed away the comforting hand she tried to place on his shoulder. Her eyes widened.

"… Hiro."

"Go!" He wailed. "Just go. Leave me! That's what you want isn't it!" Kosu couldn't move. "GO!" Her fists balled resisting the urge to reach out to him. She turned from him, slowly making her way towards the door with heavy limbs.

She met Hiriko's gaze as she passed her. Look after him. Kosu paused in the door way, glancing back to a very broken Hiro. It was for the best. She repeated the mantra in her head, her breathing turned shallow as Hiriko tried to desperately console Hiro.

X

"Look who decided to show up for once." Genma muttered to Ebisu but was heard by the group sat around him. They turned their heads in unison as Kosu entered the classroom. Rin frowned as she noticed the heavy slump to Kosu's shoulders and the very dark shadow that seemed to linger on her face.

"Ergh." Ebisu groaned. "It's better when we can just forget that the outsider exists."

"Ebisu!" Rin snapped.

"What?" He turned to face her. "You want to tell me that classes with him are better? That you miss his sparkling presence?" He challenged. "He isn't from here so he doesn't know what it means to be Konoha." Rin's hands slammed onto the desk as she stood from her seat and marched over to Kosu.

"Rin?" Obito called in alarm.

Kosu glanced to the side as Rin took the seat next to her. Rin met her gaze with confidence and sent her a small, shy smile, her cheeks pinking slightly. Kosu looked past Rin to the group she had come from. Obito's arms waved frantically as he yelled at Ebisu who seemed determined in ignoring him.

"I don't need someone to sit by my side Rin." Kosu said.

"Whether you need it or not, it's the right thing to do." Kosu found herself frozen under the weight of Rin's words. Her gaze slowly circled her classmates face, conviction threaded through her features. Rin would make a good older brother.

Rin's cheeks flushed and a shy smile claimed her lips. It was a small upwards tilt to the corner of her mouth, but terribly infectious and Kosu turned her head to hide the mirrored smile that claimed her mouth.

Daiki strolled into the classroom; his shadow passed over the fūinjutsu notes laid in front of Kosu. Various combinations and designs of kanji she could paint onto her body, each closer to what she knew would be the perfect design. She cleared the notes into her bag and focussed her attention on the scowling chūnin. Clearly, he was as pleased to see her as the other boys.

Kosu sighed and tried to focus on the droned explanation Daiki was giving on shuriken geometry. Her minds eyes continued to drift away from her, Hiro's broken expression and desperate cry cutting through her focus. With each flash of the memory her muscles coiled tighter and the tension that flowed through her veins burned against her skin.

By the end of class her hands all but itched for need of use. She ducked away from Rin's company and skulked after her sparring partner. Kosu waited for his final few friends to peal away from his walk home, heading to there own houses, before dropping down beside him.

"I can't spar later." He knew she hated to waste time with pleasantries.

"Good, we'll spar now." She said. Kakashi turned to her, brow pinched as he looked her up and down. Kosu stubbornly refused to meet his gaze.

"I can't spar now." Kakashi said slowly. His legs tensed, ready to dodge away from a likely surprise attack into the middle of a street. Kosu wouldn't care about the civilian park to their side or the innocent eyed families within it.

Kosu's gaze snapped to him, a storm dancing in her grey eyes.

"Why not?"

"My father's leaving for a mission, I want to spend the evening with him." He said, the corner of his eyes tracked her fists as they balled at her sides. She snorted, her jaw clenching and unclenching. "Kosu, are you o-?"

She jumped from his side before he could even finish the question. Though, her actions spoke louder than any verbal answer she could have given.

X

Kosu arrived in centre of the clearing by the Uzumaki shrine. There were a few long hours before she was meant to meet Mito, hours she was meant to spend at home… with Hiro. Her breath shook unevenly as her chest seemed to run hot and cold at the same time.

Kosu braced her hands on her knees and desperately sucked a deep breath into her chest. Her vision wide eyes fixed unseeingly on a patch on the ground. Through her blurred vision she found a single blade of grass on focussed on it. A deep breath in as she looked down the blade, and out and she trailed her gaze to its soft green tip.

The hot-cold chill bled from her chest and took the strength from her legs as it did so. Dried dirt kicked up around her as she collapsed back onto her arse.

It was the best for Hiro.

She scrubbed her fingers over her eyes, desperate to rid them of the watery burn that threatened to blur her vision. She repeated the words in her head and the clearing gradually came into better focus. With a shaky breath she pulled her fūinjutsu notes from her bag and splayed them before her. This she could focus on, beyond the ink and paper everythign else could fade away.

X

Mito stood over Kosu, her hair a bigger mess than usual as she poured over the manic spread of notes in front of her. Bloodshot eyes raked over the pages before screwing one up and shoving it to the side with the other discarded reams of kanji. The young girl spared a flicker of a glance to Mito and returned her manic focus to the pages.

Mito frowned. This wasn't Kosu, not a healthy Kosu at least.

"Let's have some tea."

"No. Thank you." Kosu didn't even look at her.

"It's time for some tea." Mito's tone, though still warm, finally pulled Kosu from her work. Sunken eyes glowered up at her but she lowered the inked brush and placed her hands on her knees.

Mito sighed and took a seat next to Kosu. She could feel the hard stare of the girl next to her as she leisurely took out the tea set and began to prepare it over the fire. From the corner of her eye she could see Kosu's fingers grow restless, twitching and itching to move. A poor little bird, too confused to know whether to fight or flight – a decision that had been black and white to her before then.

"You've arranged for Hiro to be taken into the care of the orphanage." Mito stated rather than asked as she poured water into the aged pot to begin boiling. In her periphery Kosu trembled.

Mito inhaled slowly and turned to her student. The words died on her lips as her eyes widened at the sight of the young girl before her. Silent tears rolled down flushed red cheeks. The veins in the girls neck stood on end as she forced back any trace of a sound. Of course the girl with the blind brother would cry without a sound.

"He hates me."

Mito didn't hesitate. She wrapped her arm around the girl and pulled her tightly to her chest. Kosu inhaled shakily and pushed closer to Mito, her hands clenched the soft material of her top as her tears stained the ornate pattern.

"He won't forever." Mito soothed as she carded her fingers through Kosu's hair.

"I don't know what to do." Kosu croaked. "My job is to protect him, to care for him. But I can't do that here. It can't be like it was behind these fucking walls. And we can't leave because he's at home here… So I need to protect his home to protect him, but I'm too weak to even do that. I need to work this fūinjutsu out. I need to work it out now. I need… I need, to be better."

"And you will. Kosu, you will be the most remarkable kunoichi. You're already part way there." Mito said. She pulled the girl from her and cupped her blotched face in her wrinkled hands. "But this takes time. Please, put your faith in the village to keep both of you safe and cared for until you're ready to wear the Konoha symbol."

"… How? How can I do that? I don't know a villages thoughts or what it can do or will do. I know my mind, and what I can do."

Mito's thin lips pulled together in a tight, bitter smile as she carefully wiped the tears from Kosu's cheeks.

"You have been such a good big brother, and taken on so much. I know that that responsibility is almost impossible to hand over to someone else. Your fingers are itching to claw it back and return to what's familiar… But Kosu, do you trust me?"

"…Yes." She breathed, and her own eyes widened at the admission.

"And I trust this Village to care for your brother."

Kosu inhaled slowly and closed her bloodshot eyes. She pressed her cheek into Mito's hand for a moment before she exhaled and pulled away from her. Her wetted lashes opened to reveal the same reddened eyes, but the bladed sharpness had returned to her metallic irises.

"Would you like me to pour the tea?" Kosu asked. Mito leant back from the girl and smiled at the distinctly Kosu 'thank you'. She motioned with her hand towards the stooping pot and watched with fondness as the girl poured the fragrant liquid into two cups.

"So, tell me about this madness." Mito said as she surveyed the nearest scattered notes.

"I can draw a seal onto my body to use it. I could just transfer those that are used on fūinjutsu paper. We know they work." Kosu began.

"But you don't want to do that?"

"It's a waste. Fūinjutsu paper is a rigid medium, so those seals are unchangeable. They perform one desired function. My body is more flexible than that." She flexed her fingers before her, the skin pinkened by the heat of the cup. "I could technically pull a seal together from 5 spaced points on my body if I activated the kanji correctly." She took a sip from her tea and pulled some of the discarded calculations between them. "And if I can pull the seal together from across my body, theoretically I could use the same kanji in different combinations to make numerous different seals."

"But that flexibility increases the instability of the seals you create."

"Exactly. There's a balance in the middle somewhere, I'm sure of it. I just can't find it… yet."

"Yet." Mito repeated. "This work is good Kosu, a little manic, but good." Kosu hid the upward quirk of her lips behind a mouthful of tea. "I think we should try some of these configurations on fūinjutsu paper, and if they don't destroy that medium test them on you."

Kosu tilted her head to the side and eyed Mito.

"I would have thought you'd want me to do more drafts?"

"Sometimes you-" Her sentenced was claimed by a thick chest rattling cough. Mito's lungs burned as she caught the harsh coughs into her hanky with practise ease. A rough burn lingered on her chest as the cough faded and her vision cleared around the edges. She felt Kosu's small hand on her back as she offered her a canteen of water.

"Are you ill?" Kosu made no effort to hide the concerned pinch of her brow.

"I wouldn't worry about me. You're the one about to try untested fūinjutsu on yourself." Mito hid the stained hanky within the folds of her clothes.

"We're testing on paper first." Kosu smirked.

"There's still a danger this could rebound terribly on you Kosu." Mito held her with a serious stare. "I won't dress down the dangers of what we're trying to do here."

"I know Mito-sensei."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

XScouseLondonerX

Soooooo, it's been a horrendously long time since I've updated this fic. I swore to myself when I plotted this story out originally that I was going to finish it and I'm going to stick by that. It may take me a while but I really want to share with you all where I see this fic going.

I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed or DMed me with messages of support. I honestly appreciate the time you take to share your thoughts on the fic so, so much.

I hope you've enjoyed chapter 11, it was hard to write. There are quite a few plot points that needed to be woven in alongside some huge character growth for our dear little Kosu.