Chapter 1: Elizabeth

4 Months Earlier

I pressed snooze for the third time that morning. Why I always stayed up so late I wasn't sure. After working out, dinner, and finishing grading, I usually spent my time reading or scrolling through Facebook or Instagram. "Ugh! Tonight I am going to bed early!" I groaned and stretched, trying to wake myself up. I was not a morning person.

After showering and getting ready for the day, I headed out the door. I decided my regular black coffee that morning wasn't going to cut it and a stop at Starbuck's was in order. Once in the car I scrolled through my phone and put on my "Jammin Playlist" that never failed to put me in a good mood. Soon Redbone's Come and Get Your Love was blasting through the speakers. I know it was an old one hit wonder, but it never failed to put a smile on my face.

I pulled into Starbuck's and saw the drive through line was wrapped around the building. Having some time to spare, I decided to head inside. As I was pulling open the door, my phone rang. Rosie, one of my best friends. "Hey Rosie! I am just walking into Starbuck's. Can I call you back once I'm back in my car?"

"Ugh yes I guess that's fine" Rosie drawed out acting annoyed. "But before I let you go, I must tell you about.."

"Ok thanks Rosie! I will call you back!" I cut her off knowing I would never get her off the phone if I let Rosie go on with whatever she was about to say. With that I hung up and got in line.

Thankfully the line was moving quickly. I placed my order and went off to the side to wait for my drink. While waiting I overheard a man talking behind me. "Alright, let's try Zofran for the nausea and keep giving the Benadryl as well. I should be in soon. Thanks. Bye."

"Order for Elizabeth!" the barista shouted out. I walked up to get my drink and thanked the worker. As I was starting to walk away I realized I needed a coffee collar. The cup was hot! I quickly grabbed one from the counter along with a splash stick. While putting on the coffee collar, I turned back around to leave, my head down focusing on the task at hand.

"Order for Jake!" the barista shouted.

Before I realized what was happening, I bumped into a solid wall of muscle. Unsteady on my feet from the run in, the person's hands went to my upper arms to steady me. Looking up from my cup and saying a quick prayer of thanks that I had grabbed the splash stick not a moment before, my eyes landed on a set of beautiful hazel eyes.

"Ah I am so, so sorry. Are you ok?" the man asked. At that moment he looked up himself as his eyes focused on mine.

I stood there with my mouth slightly agape. I had a strong sense that I somehow knew him, but at the same time I didn't think I had ever met him before. He looked back at me with a similar look of recognition but also confusion etched on his face. The rest of the room seemed to melt away and time seemed to slow as I looked at the man trying to figure out the strange feeling that had overcome me.

I wasn't sure how long Istood there for. It felt like a while, but in actuality it was probably only a few seconds. "I.. uh.." I stammered, still searching his eyes.

Someone nudged me from behind, breaking the spell. Words Elizabeth, Now would be the time to use words. You know them, use them. I shook her head and closed my eyes for a brief second to ground myself. "Yes, I am fine. I'm sorry about that too. It was my fault," I said, still a little flustered.

"Well yeah it kinda was, but I wasn't going to call you out on it" the man smirked, obviously joking.

I offered a smile back along with a soft laugh. "Thank you for letting me hold on to my pride like that" I joked and then paused, still searching his eyes. "I.. I should go'' I quickly stated, finally realizing we were standing right in front of the counter for what was turning into a longer than normal time for a simple bump into each other. With that I started to head for the door.

"Hey wait!" the man called out to her retreating back.

I turned. "Yes?"

"Do I.. do I know you from somewhere?" he questioned, his brow pulled together clearly trying to place me.

"Umm not that I know of."

"You just… I just.. I feel like I know you."

I offered a small shrug as we both looked at each other again. "I…"

"Order for Jake" the barista called out again louder right as the man's cell phone rang. He looked down at his phone. "I need to get this," he said almost reluctantly. "Well.. have a good day."

"You too," I smiled right as the barista shouted out Jake again even louder and the man rolled his eyes with a bemused look on his face.

"Bye Jake" I smiled as he offered a small wave with a slightly confused look on his face.

Laughing and shaking my head, I was out the door. Finally sitting in my car, I took a deep breath and then a sip of my coffee. "That turned out to be an interesting Starbuck's run" I thought to myself as I started the car.

As I headed to school I realized I still needed to call Rosie back. I pulled up her number and pressed dial

"Finally! I've been waiting for you!" Rosie answered on the first ring.

"Well good morning to you too!" I laughed.

"Yes, yes good morning! Now." she paused to add a little drama in typical Rosie fashion. "What are you doing tonight?"

"Umm well.. The usual. Workout, dinner, grading and school prep."

"ERRRRN" Rosie shouted, mimicking the sound of a buzzer. "Wrong answer!"

I laughed again. "What's going on Rosie? I have about 5 minutes before I need to start my work day."

"We are hanging out tonight. Me and you. Like old times. Nothing too special, but I'm coming over, bringing dinner, and we are going to spend some quality time together."

"Rosie I don't know... I have work to do."

"I'm not taking no for an answer!" Rosie demanded.

I still hesitated. Rosie's tone softened. "Please Elizabeth? I have no ulterior motives. I just feel like we haven't spent a lot of time together lately. I miss my friend."

"Oh alright!" I conceded. "But you better be bringing some of your famous chocolate cake!"

"I already bought the ingredients from the store."

"Yeah you did!" I sang out as my mouth watered just thinking of the delicious cake.

Rosie laughed. "Alright dear, well I will let you go. I will text you when I'm on my way but plan on seeing me around 5 or so."

"Bye Rosie!" I said while ending the call. I had planned to have her normal quiet night, but after talking to Rosie I realized it had been awhile since we spent a lot of time together. With Rosie planning her wedding and my starting the new semester, we hadn't seen much of each other. Pulling into the school I smiled, looking forward to the evening.

…

I was sitting at my kitchen table finishing grading my students' math tests from the school day when my doorbell rang. And it didn't just ring once. It rang six times. I rolled her eyes. Only Rosie. I loved the girl like a sister, but she was a bit… eccentric. Rosie and I had been friends since the second grade. I could still clearly remember Rosie marching up to me on the playground, linking our arms together and saying "we are going to be the best of friends." And it turned out, Rosie was right. Although opposite, we balanced each other. Where Rosie was loud, outgoing, and impulsive, I was more reserved and thoughtful. One might look at the two of us and not understand how we could be friends, but for us it just worked. We had a close bond after growing up together and attending the same college. We celebrated each other through the good times and leaned on one another through the bad. I honestly wasn't really sure what I would do without her.

"Hey Rosie" I said while opening the door. "I will never understand your need to ring the doorbell so many times."

Rosie let out one of her contagious laughs as she bounded through the door, her arms full of bags. "Oh, Elizabeth. I thought you stopped trying to understand me years ago" she said laughing again. "I am like the 8th wonder of the world."

I laughed and followed her into the kitchen. "So what all do we have here?" I watched as Rosie started pulling things out of various bags.

"Well I initially thought I would make something for us to eat tonight, but Mexican was calling my name."

"Jose Quesos?"

Rosie paused what she was doing and stared at me. "Really? Is there anything else? What type of question is that?" Rosie deadpanned.

"Honestly, Rosie? I don't even know." I said just as seriously back. After a moment, we both burst into laughter. Jose Quesos has been our favorite Mexican place for as long as I could remember. Not only were their chips, queso, and guac the best in the area, but their fish tacos were to die for.

"I got us the usual queso, guac, and chips. And then I got us fish tacos to share."

"Sounds perfect." I got down two plates and glasses. "What would you like to drink?"

"Water is good."

I filled up our glasses as Rosie divided up the food. Once we were seated at the table, Rosie looked at me while pointing to me with her fork. "So, do you want me to start with a hard question or an easy one?"

I paused as I was bringing a bite of food to my mouth. "Umm.. let's start with easy. Slowly work our way up to whatever crazy scheme you have cooked up."

Rosie laughed. "No scheme, I promise. First off, how is school going?"

"It's been good. It always is an adjustment to get back into the swing of things after winter break, but I have a really great class this year. All the students are always so engaged and participate so that makes it more fun for all of us."

"That's good to hear. Nothing worse than boring third graders," she said with a roll of her eyes.

"Rosie!" I laughed. Rosie just gave a shrug.

"And how's that one boy in your class doing? Philip is it?"

"Oh yes. Philip Cantrell. He was back for the first week or so after break. But I heard from his mom Monday that he was admitted back to the hospital."

"Oh no! That breaks my heart to hear!"

"Ugh I know. I feel terrible that a child has to go through so much. And he is such a sweetheart too. My class actually came up with an idea to make cards for him and then it turned into a bigger project for making cards for multiple cancer patients."

"Oh what a wonderful idea!"

"Yes! I was proud of them for thinking of it. What about you? How's the wedding planning going?"

"Wedding planning is good. I feel like we are kinda in a lull right now. All the big stuff planned and booked. I am sure it will get more chaotic once it starts getting closer. Lee and I are meeting with the priest for our required premarital counseling. That's been… interesting" Rosie laughed.

"Good interesting or bad interesting?"

"Oh it's fine. Some of the stuff has been great, and he made us read the Love Languages book. Which I've been trying to get Lee to read with me forever! Guess I just needed some 'divine intervention'" Rosie said nudging Ellizabeth who laughed. "But some of the stuff he talks about is just… outdated. I mean we are not living in the early 1900's anymore!"

I laughed again. "What does Lee think of it?"

"Oh you know Lee. He's nothing but polite when we are there and then makes some witty jokes on the drive home. But overall, it's been good. It's definitely a bonding experience."

We continued to eat and catch up. One thing about Rosie is she was never at a loss of words. The girl could talk forever about anything and everything.

"Oh so what was the hard question you had for me?" I hesitantly asked as we wrapped up our meal.

Rosie slapped her hands together. "Oh yes! How could I forget! I've been wondering about this since this morning." Rosie's face turned serious as I wondered what was about to come out of my friend's mouth. "Did it go okay ordering at Starbucks?"

Rosie's serious face slowly turned into a wide smile as she started to laugh. I groaned. "Rosie. You know I hate ordering at Starbuck's. I mean honestly, how am I supposed to know the difference between an americano and a macchiato. Tell me HOW do these people know how to order these special drinks?"

Rosie laughed and patted her hand. "I don't know dear. I just don't know."

"But it went fine because I ordered my go to chai latte." I jokingly glared. I briefly wondered if I should mention to Rosie about the stranger I ran into, but then quickly decided against it. Rosie had the tendency to romanticize everything into a giant fairytale, and not to mention she wasn't even sure what I would say if I were to bring it up. Oh I also ran into this man and I thought I knew him somehow, but I didn't actually know him. No, there was definitely no reason to bring that up. I shook my head dismissing the thought. "Anyways, on to more important things. Cake?!"

"Yes!" Rosie eagerly agreed while getting up to get the dessert.

We sat around talking for the rest of the evening while enjoying their fair share of the delectable dessert. As the night was winding down, I smiled. "You know Rosie. I was nervous you had ulterior motives for coming over tonight. But I am so thankful you did. I needed this."

Rosie's eyes softened as her voice took on a more serious tone. "Elizabeth. You have been my best friend for years now. I know these past two years have been rough for you. And I'm not even going to try to pretend to know how you feel after everything that happened. But let me just say this. I am always here for you if you want to talk about things. And if you don't then I am here to chat and bring the best chocolate cake ever in my very unbiased opinion." she said with a laugh but then turned serious again. "Either way, I will forever sit beside you and be your friend."

My eyes stung as I blinked back tears. "Thank you Rosie" I softly spoke just barely above a whisper.

"Always," Rosie said, leaning over to give me a hug.

Shortly there after we said their goodbyes. While setting up my coffee for the next day, I thought back to the man I ran into that morning. I had never felt such a connection to someone before despite never having met. It was an odd feeling, but it definitely left it's impression. And he definitely was good looking. With that thought I turned off the lights and headed upstairs to get ready for bed.

While laying awake unable to fall asleep, I picked up her phone and started scrolling through social media. I landed on an old picture at our lake house of the entire family including Ben and Lionel. Tears silently began to fall down my cheeks. "I miss you both so much," I whispered. "I am still so, so sorry." It had been awhile since I had cried myself to sleep, but tonight I did.