Over the next few days, Mary rapidly concluded that having Tom back at the estate office was the most delicious form of torture she could possibly imagine.

His presence made her life brighter, happier, more joyful. She had her best friend and her business partner back and the gloom that had assailed her lately lifted. But having him back also meant she lived every day in a maelstrom of emotions, constantly battling her attraction to him, her need to be near him, her desire to touch him.

But, as it turned out, neither of them could keep their hands off each other. It was never sexual, always perfectly acceptable, respectable even, but they touched each other more now than they ever had before, and Mary relished every single contact.

It could be something as innocuous as a brush of fingers as one of them passed an invoice to the other. Sometimes it was a gentle press of his hand to her shoulder as he stood by her desk. Perhaps she would put her hand on his hip as she squeezed past him in the office or the nursery. Maybe it was his hand on the small of her back as they left the office. They were all perfectly innocent, none of them remotely scandalous or even worthy of note should anyone see them, but Mary treasured every one of those touches even as they fuelled her desire for him.

They shouldn't touch each other, she knew that. But so, she reasoned, did he and it didn't stop him touching her. And so she didn't say anything, terrified that he would put a stop to it if she mentioned it.

As Friday morning rolled around, they had a map of the estate spread out on his desk. Tom leaned on the desk, bracing his arms on it, bending to scrutinise a particular area of the woods they were looking at felling. As Mary stood close beside him, leaning in over his shoulder to look at the map too, she lay her hand on the small of his back. It wasn't an unthinking gesture – it was never unthinking when she touched him – but she wasn't expecting the reaction it set off in him. She felt the muscles of his back ripple as he shivered, saw him briefly close his eyes before he focused back on the map.

Mary looked at him curiously, her heart leaping in her chest. Experimentally, she stroked her hand further up his back then trailed it slowly back down. Tom shivered again, this time pulling in a ragged breath.

'Tom,' she breathed.

'Sorry. Sorry,' he murmured, sneaking a guilt-ridden sidelong glance at her. 'I'm just… just struggling a bit today.'

'Struggling with what?' Mary asked, watching with fascination as he shuddered involuntarily under her touch again when she traced a pattern on the small of his back.

'I'm all right. It's just harder today to keep things… well, you know,' he said, quietly.

'Strictly business?' she asked, softly.

He nodded, rocking back slightly, pushing against her hand. 'I probably shouldn't have written that letter the other day. I'm a bit… on edge. Have been since then. And you touching me, well, it's… it's a bit overwhelming. Makes it hard for me to stay... to stay completely in control.'

'Do you want me to take my hand off you?' Mary asked softly, praying that he would say no, that this wasn't the death knell for the small touches she lived for.

To her utter relief, he shook his head. 'No. No. Don't. Don't. Please.'

Mary gazed at him, her own body thrumming deliciously, and slowly trailed her fingers lightly along his spine.

Tom closed his eyes and groaned, the sound sending tendrils of desire licking through Mary. He tensed his arms and dropped his head, obviously fighting to stay in control of himself.

'You're sure you don't want me to stop?' Mary asked, her voice low and intimate, still touching him.

'I'm sure,' he said in a soft exhale.

'Because you look as if…' she trailed off, not wanting him to change his mind.

'As if what?'

'As if this is killing you,' she replied, pulling another shiver from him as she caressed his back some more.

'It is… but in a good way,' he admitted. 'It feels so intimate. It feels like…'

'Like what?' she asked curiously, still dancing her fingers up and down his spine.

'Like this is the closest I will ever get to making love to you,' he whispered, arching up into her touch. 'And I don't want it to end yet.'

Mary stared at him, her heart pounding, barely able to breathe, but she kept her hand on his back, stroking, rubbing, caressing. She watched spellbound as he reacted to her every touch, his entire body juddering, rocking and shaking under her fingers.

She leaned in closer, cupping his cheek with her free hand to pull his face towards her. He looked at her, his eyes dark with desire, his lips parted, and Mary closed the last few inches between them, kissing him. Tom moaned, kissing her back desperately, licking into her mouth.

She slipped her hand lower on his back, her fingers dipping under his waistcoat, teasing just above the waistband of his trousers, and Tom groaned again. He wrenched one hand off the desk and palmed himself roughly through the material at the front of his trousers, making desperate little noises as he kissed her. Sensing he needed more, Mary kissed him harder, sliding her tongue against his, threading her fingers into his hair. Tom stiffened, the muscles in his back tightening under her hand, then she felt his hips jerk and stutter as he panted out a series of small moans into her mouth.

Gradually, he stilled under her touch, the tense line of his shoulders softening before he shuddered one last time then broke the kiss, dropping his head down as he tried to get his breathing under control.

'Sorry,' he muttered, looking away from her, shamefaced. 'Sorry. I shouldn't have… sorry.'

'No, no, don't say sorry,' she whispered, sliding her hand up his spine again, triggering another small shiver in him. 'Don't apologise. I think you needed that.'

He hesitated then nodded, still reluctant to look at her.

'Besides…' she murmured, unable to stop thinking about what had just happened.

He flashed her a quick sideways look. 'What?'

'I think that might have been the most erotic thing I've ever seen in my life.'

Tom gave a small, embarrassed laugh. 'What? Me acting like an adolescent boy who can't control himself? I don't think so.'

Mary cupped his face with her hand and gently pulled his head around to make him look at her. She gazed at him, letting him see the truth of her words written across her face. 'It was, Tom, because I did that to you. I did that to you just by touching your back. Not even your naked back. I mean you're wearing a shirt and a waistcoat. But you still… You have no idea how that makes me feel.'

'I know how it made me feel,' he said, his voice rough. 'But I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have let it get that far. I should have moved away as soon as you touched me.'

'But you didn't.'

'No. I couldn't. I could no more have moved away or told you to stop than I could fly,' he confessed. 'But it was wrong of me to…to do that.'

'No, no, it wasn't. I didn't want to stop. I wanted to keep touching you,' Mary breathed. 'I always want to touch you. All the time.'

They stared at each other, both aware they were treading a fine line.

'I need to go and… tidy myself up,' Tom said, eventually, wafting a hand vaguely at his body, looking away from her.

Mary nodded, stepping back to let him move past her. As he did, she grabbed his hand. Tom stopped and glanced awkwardly at her.

'I don't want you to feel ashamed of this, of what happened here this morning,' she said, earnestly.

He looked down at his shoes. 'I'm not sure I can promise that. At the moment, I feel like a priapic schoolboy who's embarrassed himself.'

'Don't. I don't want you to feel like that. You said yourself you haven't got an outlet for the… the tension between us and that it's been a long time for you, since you...' She paused, trying to gather her thoughts. 'This moment, it wasn't just you. It was both of us. I want this too. Remember that. And if that doesn't make you feel better about what happened here then know that I will be thinking fondly of this moment when I go to bed tonight. And probably many other nights.'

Tom stared at her, his face softening, the embarrassment dissipating somewhat. He nodded then leaned in to press a quick kiss to the corner of her lips.

'Thank you,' was all he said, then he disappeared out of the door to sort himself out. Mary stared after him, her body humming with desire and her mind going ten to the dozen.