Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon.
A/N: I am so sorry everyone about the long wait! It was a busy month for me! But now that the Christmas season is over I was able to start writing again. This is the new chapter I came up with! We're getting right into the middle of this new Spirit Chip arc now, so I hope you're all excited!
Following the Footsteps of Destiny
Chapter 267: Where Loyalties Lie
Ryoko Ishida
Net, Northern Hemisphere, Digital World
There was a soft sound somewhere within the cavern, like a foot scraping against the stone floor, and deep within the darkness there was a whisper of something moving through the shadows. The sound of the waterfall almost obscured the noise, and if the golden-haired Digidestined had not already been waiting for something like this to happen, he would have missed the sound entirely.
The sound of something waiting for him in the blackness of the cave.
Maybe I'm dreaming?
No, this was no dream. Something was definitely amiss. He had felt it the moment something unseen had woken him out of a deep slumber. At first he had felt disoriented, as if somebody had drugged him before he'd drifted off for the night, but now that he'd had a few moments to collect himself, his head was clear and his body was on the alert.
He knew exactly what the problem was, and he knew why he suddenly felt so uneasy. The answer was obvious.
Somebody was watching him.
Who, he did not know, but as he lay there in the darkness trying not to make any noise, his head could only work out one solution to the problem. It was time to take action. Somebody was keeping a close eye on him, and he needed to figure out who it was.
There was only one problem. His body didn't want to move.
Somebody's hiding in the darkness. But why? Why would anybody want to hide from me?
Or maybe it was the opposite. Maybe he was the one who was hiding, and whoever was out there watching him was waiting for him to come to them.
The darkness is so thick...
Ryoko slowly opened his sapphire eyes, and without moving a muscle he studied the thick darkness saturating the atmosphere around him. He did not know what had made the sound just moments ago, but whatever but was it had suddenly gone silent, like a predator stalking its prey.
I'm the prey. Whatever it is, it's waiting for me.
It wasn't a wild guess. Ryoko could feel it in his bones. The thing waiting out there was watching him because he was the target. At the moment, he did not feel frightened, only wary and suspicious, but he had a feeling that would change if he finally became bold enough (or stupid enough, depending on how you looked at it) to investigate the source of the noise.
Dai would check it without any hesitation, but what about me? Maybe I'm both. Maybe it's bravery and stupidity all rolled into one with me...
Ryoko closed his eyes again in a useless attempt to steady his breathing pattern, and lying as still as possible he strained his ears to listen.
Still nothing.
Other than the pleasant sound of water tumbling into the stream flowing across the cavern, the cave was quiet, but he could still feel that tingling sensation that indicated someone or something was still watching him. He could feel the eyes studying his face, and they made his skin feel cold all over.
Well, maybe the cave isn't completely quiet...
Over the sound of the water Ryoko could hear Dai's steady breathing. It was deep and even, which meant the goggle-headed leader was still sleeping undisturbed. Ryoko could feel Dai's back moving slightly every time he took a breath, and the sensation allowed him to stay calm. It was a simple matter of matching his breathing rate to that of his goggle-headed friend's, and that allowed him to stay focused on the task at hand.
Even though he was lying on the cold, hard ground in a sleeping bag that was barely adequate for the job, he felt surprisingly comfortable. The warm air coming from the natural vents in the rocks had heated the stone enough to make it bearable to sleep on, and he could feel the pleasant waves of heat washing over his body. Because he had his back turned towards the vents, his face was cool, but he preferred it that way even when he was sleeping in his own bed at night. On top of that he could feel the warmth of Dai's body seeping into his back, and it made him feel secure and safe as he lay there in the darkness. The two of them had fallen asleep back to back, and by some instinct they had remained that way to ward off the chill of the night.
Alopemon was still sleeping peacefully in his small pile of snow off to one side, and Ryoko had to smile. The little rookie was snoozing far enough away that the warm air from the vents wouldn't melt his snow pile, but he was still close enough to protect them at a moment's notice if they needed him. Because of that Ryoko felt a rush of affection for his partner, and it made him smile in the darkness.
The smile didn't last for very long, though. Upon discerning that both Daichi and Alopemon were still fast asleep, he was forced to come to the conclusion that neither of them had made the sound he'd heard in the darkness only moments ago.
Who could it have been then?
There it was again, a soft scraping sound coming from somewhere near the entrance that they had used several hours ago to reach the chamber where they had decided to set up camp for the night.
What if it's DarkAngelicmon or one of the others?
Unable to stay motionless anymore, Ryoko slowly sat up, and twisting around he turned to squint at the doorway that was off to his right. Regardless of how uneasy he felt, it was time for him to take action.
I can't let anything threaten Dai or Alopemon.
Next to him, Dai let out a soft protest at the sudden loss of his own personal heater, and Ryoko put a hand on the goggle-headed leader's shoulder to keep him quiet. Fortunately, Dai did not wake up, and Ryoko was left to study the darkness in peace without having to answer any awkward questions. What was that he had seen just now? It looked like a flash of yellow.
There's definitely something out there. It's looking right at me. I knew something like this was going to happen. I felt it even before I feel asleep.
Ryoko slowly climbed to his feet, and after a brief hesitation he took a few steps towards the first entrance to the cavern. Something moved in the darkness, and once again he spotted a flash of yellow. It caught him completely off guard, and for a moment all he could do was stare into the shadows with his mouth hanging open.
That looked like Matty's coat...
Before the sound had dragged him out of a deep sleep, Ryoko knew he had been dreaming. He could only remember fragments of those dreams now, but they had all featured his golden-haired cousin. Had that been the sign of a guilty conscience, or was it something more than that? The dreams had been unpleasant, and upon waking they had disturbed him. Never before had he ever had nightmares about the people he cared about, and even the mere thought of those dreams caused a terrible shiver to race down his spine.
And now here he was, the object of his dreams taunting him in the darkness.
But how? How is this possible?
Ryoko suddenly found himself running towards the entrance, but he stopped short when he spotted the silhouette of a person sitting on a clump of rocks near the door.
The figure sat there unmoving, as if they were waiting for him to approach.
"Matty?"
The word was barely above a whisper, and it slipped out before Ryoko could stop himself from opening his mouth. He could hear the sound of his voice trembling, and moving closer he caught a glimpse of golden hair.
"Matty," the figure repeated, as if testing the name on his tongue.
The word was soft, and the tone was definitely familiar.
Ryoko once again came to a stop, and he felt his chest constrict. Somewhere deep within his heart he felt something break, and his whole body began to tremble with suppressed emotion. That had definitely been Matty's voice.
He would recognize it anywhere.
And yet...there was something that sounded a bit off about it.
There was no life in his voice. He sounds like a body with no soul, his words flat and emotionless.
Ryoko hesitated, but he knew he couldn't keep quiet. He needed to know how this miracle had taken place. There was no way Matty should have been anywhere close to him, and it made him feel uneasy. He didn't trust himself to speak, but even so, he said calmly, "Matty, what are you doing here? I thought you were with the others."
"Aren't you glad to see me?" the figure replied, the words coming out harsh and bitter sounding.
Ryoko flinched at the tone, and feeling like he had just been slapped across the face, he said defensively, "You know I don't mean it like that. I just meant...how did you get here so quickly? You were so far away from us."
"Did you really want to find me?" the voice belonging to Matty hissed in the darkness. "Or would you prefer if I just disappeared forever?"
No. No, this can't be Matty. He wouldn't say that. He wouldn't talk to me like that!
The words and the harsh tone shocked him, but he wouldn't although himself to falter no matter how much Matty's strange behaviour hurt him. He needed to know for sure.
He needed to know how his cousin truly felt about him, no matter how much it might destroy him.
Do you hate me, Matty? Do you hate me because of Dai?
Somehow Ryoko finally forced himself to move, and stumbling through the darkness he slipped and fell. His momentum left him sprawled at the blond figure's feet, and looking up a gasp escaped his lips when he found himself gazing into a pair of hateful amber eyes.
It really was Matty.
Never before had his cousin ever looked at him like that before, but he would know those eyes anywhere. They were cold and distant, and Ryoko could feel them freezing the very core of his being. There his cousin sat in familiar clothes, wearing a familiar grey and yellow ski jacket, but Ryoko hardly recognized him. Matty's blond hair poked out from underneath his hat, and his amber eyes glittered with malice in the darkness. It was a disconcerting sight, and it took Ryoko's breath away.
Matty's face was a face Ryoko knew so well, and yet the person sitting before him looked like a complete stranger. The younger twin's handsome features were twisted in rage, and his amber eyes shone with an eerie radiance. At the moment Matty's hands were resting in his lap, his fingers clenched together into tight fists, and his back was rigid. He looked like a statue, cold and unmoving.
This can't be Matty. He would never look at me like that...
"Look at you, all nice and cozy," Matty said quietly, his words dripping with sarcasm. "Are you having a nice time with my best friend?"
Ryoko opened his mouth to protest, but he never got the words out. The air escaped his lungs in a single breath as Matty suddenly kicked him hard in the ribs, and letting out a startled cry he flopped onto his stomach gasping for air. The stone beneath him was cold, but he did not attempt to sit up. The blow had taken him completely by surprise, and the sudden pain in his ribs brought tears to his eyes. He opened his mouth to try a second time, but Matty kicked him again, this time in the thigh.
"I always thought you were an honest person," Matty said, crouching next to him and speaking softly in his ear. "But now I know I was wrong. This was your agenda all along, wasn't it. To take from me what's mine."
The rustle of Matty's clothing when he had slid off the rocks to move closer seemed to echo in Ryoko's ears, and it took him a moment to process the younger twin's words. Every sound was so sharp, so real. How was he to deny what was taking place before him?
Ryoko shook his head at the thought, and reaching out to catch his cousin's arm, he gasped, "No! I don't want to hurt you! That's why I stayed away! That's why I didn't-"
"Lies!" Matty hissed, brushing his hand away and grabbing a fistful of his hair. "All lies! You've always wanted Dai for yourself. You've always wanted to get rid of me!"
"No, I never-"
Ryoko cried out in pain as Matty yanked his head back, and breathing heavily he was forced to gaze into his cousin's hateful eyes. He could feel the darkness seeping out of Matty's body, but every time he tried to close his eyes and look away, the younger twin would pull harder on his hair and force his head back even further.
The hand was warm. It was too real, too lifelike. Just like the warm breath that ghosted across his ear.
"What ever happened to family?" Matty whispered, the chips of ice in his voice tearing at Ryoko's soul. "We're cousins. We're blood. We're practically brothers. How could you hurt me like this?"
Ryoko couldn't answer. He wanted to cry, but the tears wouldn't come. It still felt too unreal to him. He still couldn't accept what was happening. There had to be some kind of mistake.
Matty, please...
Ryoko knew his voice was shaking, but even so, he whispered, "I wouldn't hurt you. I'd never hurt you."
This isn't Matty. And even if...even if it was, it's not him really. It's the darkness. The darkness is to blame. This cave is doing it to him. This place, the Ice Caverns. The Powers of Darkness control these caves. He wouldn't harm me. He wouldn't do anything to me. He'll wake up. He'll fight the darkness. I'm safe. I know I'm safe with him...
"You were supposed to be loyal to me!" Matty hissed, shaking him so hard he felt his teeth rattle together. "Where is that loyalty now, Ryoko? Where is your love for family now? Where is your love for me?"
When did he get to be so strong?
Ryoko clung desperately to his cousin's jacket, and words cracking, he said, "I am loyal to you. That's why I couldn't do it. That's why I couldn't be friends with him!"
Matty suddenly let go of him, and Ryoko felt his head hit the stone floor. Somehow he managed to roll over onto his stomach again, and groaning he rubbed the back of his head to assess the damage.
His body felt battered and bruised, and he could hear a sound echoing off the cavern walls. It was only after the rush of the waterfall reached his ears again that he realized the sound he was hearing was the ghostly reverberation of his own dry sobs.
It wasn't supposed to be like this. None of this was ever supposed to happen.
Is this how Matty really sees me? Does he really believe I would steal his best friend from him? Does he really think I don't hold any loyalty to him or that I would hurt or abandon him? Does he really think I would choose one friend over another regardless of who they are?
What did it matter, blood related or not. His friends were family, and his family were friends. He did not distinguish between the two. They were all his friends, and they were all his family. He could never choose one or the other over any of them.
Does he really hate me? Deep down under that mask of affection, doe he truly despise me for trying to steal what's most important to him?
It should have been a dream, and yet here he was. Wide awake.
Ryoko had been waiting for something like this to happen, but now that it had he didn't know what to do. This confrontation had been building up for a long time now, and now that it had finally exploded he felt like he was drowning in the darkness. He had never expected it to happen quiet like this.
How would he ever be able to make things right again?
It's not his fault! Matty's kind and gentle. In that, he's more like Mickey than he realizes. He loves us all. It's the darkness, It's the darkness that's hurting him...
But how had Matty gotten there? Though one of the mirrors perhaps?
After I spent all afternoon wanting desperately to reach him and the others...
And more importantly, where was Matty now?
Ryoko gingerly pulled himself into a sitting position, and glancing frantically around the cavern he spotted a shadow moving towards Dai and Alopemon. A glimpse of yellow on the figure's back told him all he needed to know, and a surge of panic shot through his body.
He didn't know how he could be so sure, but he suddenly knew with a certainty that Matty was going to hurt Dai.
No!
A cry escaped his throat before he could stop himself, and struggling to his feet he stumbled after Matty with an arm held tight to his ribs. Somewhere deep inside himself he found a burst of adrenaline that he didn't know he possessed, and racing after Matty he managed to tackle his cousin as the younger twin came within ten feet of where Dai was still sleeping, blissfully unaware of the danger he was in.
They rolled across the ground in a tangle of arms and legs, and as they came to a stop Ryoko could feel himself panting from the effort.
As he lay there for a moment to catch his breath, he felt a sense of despair wash over him. This figure not only looked like Matty, he smelled like Matty and he felt like him too. Every sensation was so familiar to Ryoko. He did not see how this person could be anyone else.
And yet, despite the feel of him and the smell of him, this figure seemed so alien. It was unnerving, and it made Ryoko feel sick inside.
"I knew you would choose him over me," Matty growled, shoving him off and grabbing him in a choke hold.
Ryoko didn't even try to resist. Instead, he slumped against the younger twin's body and let his eyes fall closed.
Dai and Alopemon were still asleep, and the other Digidestined were still so far away from him. He didn't even have his D-Coder Digivice to save Matty with. It was still tucked away in his sleeping bag.
I have to try, though. I have to save him!
A part of him was vaguely aware of the fact that he should probably be concerned for his own safety, but he couldn't bring himself to care. It didn't matter. This was his cousin, his friend, his brother. He shouldn't need saving from his own cousin.
"Answer me!" Matty hissed in his ear, tightening his hold.
It was getting harder to breath, and placing a hand over Matty's grip, he whispered, "You're hurting me."
"That's not even a fraction of the pain I feel," Matty said bitterly, though there was a satisfied smile in his voice. "I'm going to make you feel my pain, and then you won't be able to hurt me ever again."
Matty's hold was so tight Ryoko could barely speak, but somehow he managed to get the words out. "You won't hurt Dai. I know you won't."
"He betrayed me," Matty said softly, a strange laugh escaping his throat. "What does it matter if he's gone?"
Ryoko could feel Matty's heart beating against his shoulder blades, and with that sensation he could sense the younger twin's excitement. It frightened him, but at the same time it made him feel sad. Once again the sensation was too real. The thump of Matty's heart and the warm blood flowing through the younger twin's arteries. He could feel Matty's warmth burning his skin through his own jacket, but he didn't have the strength to pull away. One of Matty's arms was still twisted around his throat, and reaching down Ryoko grabbed the hand that was draped over his chest. Matty's skin was cold, and he could feel the darkness seeping into his hand from the sudden contact. He didn't jerk his hand away, though. He need to reach Matty. He needed to make him understand.
"I always have to share everything," Matty whispered harshly in his ear, the warmth of his breath making Ryoko cringe. "My brother, Dai, and now you too? I've never been very good at sharing, Ryoko. You would know better than anybody. After all, we're the same in that regard."
Ryoko could feel himself trembling in Matty's grip, and the darkness seeping out of the younger twin's body was starting to invade his own. His cousin was too real to merely be a figment of his imagination. This was really happening. He was losing Matty to the darkness.
"I always loved you best, you know," Matty said in a conversational tone, pulling his hand away to pat him gently on the head. "Out of all of our cousins, you were always my favorite. But then you betrayed me. Dai, my best friend. Mickey, my twin. My other half. And now you. All of you have hurt me. All of you have betrayed me. Why, Ryoko? Why do you all want to keep hurting me?"
Matty wasn't like this. Matty did not behave like this. Matty didn't talk like this. Who was this imposter? Who was this fake trying to slander his cousin's name?
Ryoko kept his eyes closed. He couldn't stand to look into that hateful amber gaze anymore. "No one wants to hurt you, Matty. We all want to help you."
"See? Look, you're hurting me right now," Matty said cheerfully, though Ryoko felt the younger twin's grip tighten. "You keep lying to me all the time, Ryoko. I don't like lies."
"You don't understand. You think I'm only here to save Dai, but that's not it at all."
"Really?" Matty snorted, his blond hair brushing against the top of Ryoko's scalp until you couldn't tell which strands belonged to who. Their hair was the exact same shade of blond, every bit like brothers. "That's not how it looks to me."
At that moment, the tears finally came. Ryoko could feel them sliding down his cheeks, and choking slightly, he managed to whisper, "I'm not just trying to save Dai. I'm trying to save you from yourself."
The words ended in a cough as Ryoko gasped for air. He needed to reach Matty, even if it cost him his life.
"You weren't going to let me hurt him," Matty accused. "You chose him over me. I want to hurt him. I want him to feel my pain."
Somehow Ryoko managed to shake his head, and struggling to speak, he said breathlessly, "No, he's not to blame. If anyone is, it's me. Hurt me instead. I'm the one who deserves it."
"You would take his place?" Matty said, sounding amused. "Loyal to him to the end while I'm left behind to rot."
Ryoko was pretty sure his vision was starting to fade beneath his eyelids, and wheezing, he said, "No, loyalty knows no bounds. If I'm guilty of anything, it isn't that I abandoned you. I'm guilty of selfishness, of being loyal only to myself."
"Really," Matty said sarcastically, not sounding the least bit convinced. "If death were upon us, and only the three of us remained, what would you do? If you had a chance to saee only one of us, myself or Dai, who would you choose then? Where would your loyalties lie if one of us had to die?"
Ryoko almost laughed through his tears, but he didn't have the strength. The answer was so simple.
"Answer me!" Matty hissed, yanking on his hair.
"I would die."
"What?"
"If one of us had to die, I would save you both and die in your place. I can't choose. I won't choose. Don't you see, Matty? My loyalties lie in the bonds of friendship that I have made with all of you, and I would rather death take me than hurt what's most important to me. I won't let death sever the bonds that define me."
There was silence. Ryoko could feel Matty's harsh breathing in his ear, and somewhere deep inside he felt some kind of connection he had never felt before. There was also a sense of peace inside of him, and he felt himself relax in Matty's grip.
"I love you all, Matty. I would die for any of you, and that's why I can't let my heart waver in the darkness."
There was no response. Ryoko felt the grip on his throat loosen, and the arms that had been holding him slipped away. When he finally opened his eyes again he could see that his body was cloaked in a pale blue light.
In his mind, he thought he saw Matty's smiling face, and then the light around him began to change. Streams of yellow light circled his body, and they blended in with the blue, giving his form a brilliant shine.
He felt warm and safe, and as he slipped into unconsciousness he thought he heard Matty's voice telling him to be strong.
And deep within the distance in a cave far away from him, the sleeping body of a blond-haired youth began to glow with the same combination of blue and yellow light, and as the shadows lay heavy across the ground around the boy, the younger twin smiled into the darkness as he murmured his cousin's name.