A/N: So this is the "angst" chapter. *rolls eyes* Several of you hit the nail on the head in the reviews. Sometimes it takes the realization of what you can't have if you don't change. Trust me, it's real close to getting fluffy and Christmasy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck

After a few minutes he quit crying and pulled away, embarrassment on his face. "So, where do we start?" she asked him. Confusion covered his face. "With the work you need to do," she clarified.

"That fence line is going to need some work," Chuck began. She went over, found a pair of gloves in his bag, and began to get to work. "What are you doing?"

"Helping you," Sarah told him. "You helped me with my dad, so this is the least I can do."

"Oh," Chuck replied. He didn't understand why she was helping him, but he found his own pair of gloves and sat down beside her. "So, why is Ellie, Carina, and Zondra following me?"

"I guess they're concerned about you," Sarah told him. "Wait, where's Morgan's mom?"

"She moved away a couple of years ago," Chuck told her. Sarah stopped working on the fence. "What?"

"How long ago did Morgan die?"

"Four years ago," Chuck told her. Sarah nodded and went back to work. He felt something change between them. "Did I do something?"

"No, I just think I understand some of the things you said the other day," Sarah told him. There was a slight frown on her face.

"I really feel like I did something wrong," Chuck told her.

"No, you didn't," Sarah replied. "I just…" she took her gloves off. "I get it, you miss your friend and you mourn him, that I get, but Chuck, Morgan's mom is gone."

"She is," Chuck nodded.

"She's moved on then?" Chuck nodded again. "Then why are you holding on to this like you are?" She shook her head. "I said that poorly." Chuck just sat there. "Chuck, you're alive, and I get that you are hurt for losing your friend, but…you're still alive. No one is making you keep this place. No one is making you be alone. Actually, I'm wrong, someone is. You."

"You don't understand," Chuck began.

"No, I don't think you do, Chuck," Sarah told him. "I've been forced to live a life of hiding because of something my dad did. He did the right thing, but I had to hide, or at least he told me I did." She shook her head. "I think maybe I'm not the right person for this."

"You think I'm hiding?" Chuck asked her.

"No, I know you're hiding, and your family and friends are enabling your hiding," Sarah pointed out. "I don't say this to be mean but, Chuck, I keep seeing…a light in you, that seems to be somewhat smothered, and now I know why, and it's your choice." She reached over and squeezed his hand. "That's just not something I could do anymore."

"But I'm safe, I can't be hurt," Chuck told her.

"But you can hurt others," Sarah told him. Chuck looked confused. "You close yourself off to people, you won't let them get near so you don't get hurt. That's not the way people work." She stood up quickly, and Chuck did too. "I've hid for a long time, and I'm tired of it-"

"Sarah, I get you are, but you're safe," Chuck began.

"No," Sarah told him. "I may be okay physically, but emotionally, I'm dying a slow, painful death…and I think you are too." She shook her head. "You know what, you have your process to deal with grief, and it's not my place to tell you you're wrong."

"You think I'm wrong?" Chuck asked.

"I don't get to tell you how to grieve, Chuck, but this…this doesn't seem like the guy I thought I knew. I'm going to leave you alone." With that, she turned and left. She came quickly around the corner of the house, and when she did, she saw a car parked, watching the house. She walked quickly over to Ellie's car.

"Everything okay?" Ellie asked.

"Someone is watching Chuck," Sarah told Ellie. Ellie peered out the window. "Over there," she said pointing. Ellie nodded and started the car. She pulled up beside the car, and rolled down her window, similar to how she did to Zondra and Carina.

"Linda," Ellie said softly.

"Ellie," Linda replied with a soft smile. "It's good to see you."

"Sarah, this is Linda," Ellie told Sarah. "She was the accountant for Chuck's company."

"Another person?" Sarah asked. Ellie gave her a look. "I'm sorry, but you're all enabling him."

"She's right, Ellie," Linda said. Ellie nodded and blew out a breath.

"If I tell him what he's doing, then I become the overbearing big sister and everyone yells at me, if I do nothing, then this happens," Ellie replied. She turned to Sarah. "I assume he told you everything?"

"I assume," Sarah replied.

"Did he tell you that the reason the company was as successful as it was for as long as it was because of Morgan?"Linda asked. Sarah shook her head. "Morgan was able to make us a profit because he understood the razor thin margins. No one else could do what Morgan did."

Sarah shook her head. "Chuck did say he threw money at a problem."

"Chuck did the best he could," Linda told them. "Everyone knew that only Morgan could make things work. Brand new company, no name recognition, the heavyweights controlled the market, and we were walking a tightrope. Chuck created the best product on the market. Everyone in the industry will vouch for that."

"Morgan's death assured the death of the company," Ellie told Sarah. "And if I told him that, I'd be a raging bitch."

Sarah blew out a breath. "I told him I couldn't live like he is."

"Good," Ellie chirped. "He needed to hear it. Let's go home." Ellie turned to Linda. "You too. He's a big boy, he'll be okay." Linda nodded, started her car and took off. Sarah watched the house as they pulled away. "He needed to hear that, Sarah."

"Yeah, but I'm not sure he did," Sarah replied. She slouched back in her seat. She couldn't live like that, not anymore. So why did it bother her so much, and what did it matter how Chuck Bartowski lived her life to her?

A/N: There was no way I wasn't making this one a double chapter! Read on.

He came home sometime later, and headed straight for his room. He grabbed a shower in the bathroom off of his bedroom, came out, and was towel drying his hair as he heard someone come down the stairs. He looked over and saw his mother, a strange look on her face.

"Everything okay?" Chuck asked.

"No, I don't think so," Mary told him. "I've had a long talk with Sarah and Ellie, Chuck, they told me what happened today."

"Please, don't be mad at Sarah, Mom, she's going through a lot, her dad's funeral in two days, and I'm okay," Chuck assured her.

"Why would I be mad at Sarah?" Chuck turned around to look at his mother. "She's absolutely right, we've all been enabling you."

"Wait, what?"

"Chuck, what would Morgan say, really? What would he say?"

"Mom, don't-"

"No, I've let you get by for too long and avoid everything," she began.

"You want me to move out, because I can," Chuck told her. "If it's that big of a deal-"

"Who the hell said anything about you moving out, this is about you, Chuck. This is about you hiding. This is about you not living. This is about you being selfish."

"Selfish?" Chuck asked, a little taken aback.

"You give nothing to any relationship so you won't get hurt," Mary told him. "Do us both a favor, don't be a friend to Sarah." Chuck pulled back his chin, stunned. "She deserves someone that is there for her at all times. She deserves someone that won't hide. Chuck, I love you, but you, as you are right now, you aren't what she needs in a friend. I'm sorry, I was wrong."

Chuck stood there, stunned. His mother turned, and walked up the stairs, leaving him standing there. She went into the kitchen, and wondered if she was too hard on him. She sighed. She wondered at times how those two children came from her and Stephen. Before Morgan's death, both of her children had been so warm and affectionate towards others.

Not that her and Stephen weren't warm and affectionate, but not like Chuck and Ellie. She shook her head. Sarah had not been harsh, but she had said what she felt, what was in her heart, how so many had enabled Chuck. He had hidden from the world. She turned, to head back to talk to him, when she heard the kitchen door shut. She walked over to it and saw him in his car, pulling out of the driveway.

}o{

Chuck walked through the house….his house. It was barely furnished. No electronics, except the laptop he had brought with him. No TV, no gaming systems. Just a few chairs, and a bedroom suite. He made sure the house was cleaned at least once a month, there was heat and air circulating so the place didn't become musty.

"Morgan's mom moved on," he said softly to himself. She had met someone, and moved away. He walked into the kitchen, and he could see Morgan there, happily cooking. Chuck remembered how Morgan talked about how this was a safe space, how he felt the love that was in this house, whether it was just him and his mom, or Chuck was there, or whoever.

Morgan had talked about how it was perfect for his mom. A neighborhood that she would be fine in if he left. Chuck found his hand lightly gripping the molding, strumming his fingers against it, thinking. "Maybe it's time," he said softly.

}o{

"Peter," Chuck said into the phone the next morning. "I have a house that I think would be perfect for a woman whose husband was in WitSec and he passed away from cancer. She keeps talking about how she hasn't really known any of her neighbors and this house is in a great neighborhood." Chuck listened for a moment and grinned. "Well, they may get some housing money from WitSec, but if not, how would you feel about sponsoring it?" He listened to Peter start to protest. "Peter, it's Christmas, can't you do a little better than that?" Chuck laughed at the good-natured grumbling he heard on the other end of the phone. "Thank you Peter," Chuck said. "I will talk to you soon." With that he hung up.

A few minutes later he heard a knock on the door and figured that had to be Zondra and Carina. He had texted them first thing that morning. "Ladies," he said, opening the door. "Come in."

"Chuckles," Carina said warily. They followed him into the living room. "So, why did you ask us over here?"

"To apologize," Chuck told them. The two women looked surprised. "I've been an absolute ass to the two of you."

"Chuck, you haven't," Zondra told him. "You've been nothing but kind."

"I may have been kind, but I've kept you away because…" he paused, gathered himself, and continued. "Because I'm afraid to get hurt. I'm afraid of letting people near, for fear they'd hurt me." He snorted. "The kicker of it is, I may have hurt myself for not letting someone get near enough and now…." He trailed off, and shook his head. "It doesn't matter." He looked around the room. "What matters is, do you think we can get this house ready for Christmas?"

"Who's the client?" Carina asked, intrigued.

"I'm selling it to our group, I have the financing, and if we should need extra money, I will take it out of my cut," Chuck began. "This is going to be Emma's…if she wants it. And-and I think we should get her opinion on it."

Zondra and Carina shared a look and turned back to Chuck. "We'll do it on one condition," Zondra told him. "What do you mean you may have hurt yourself by not letting someone get too close?" Chuck pressed his lips together. "Chuck, is it Sarah?" He nodded.

"Damn it," Carina grumbled. "We're gonna have to fix a house and these two."

"Wait, what?" Chuck said.

"House will be easier," Zondra told Carina.

"Is this us getting involved?" Carina asked.

"I am right here!" Chuck protested.

"Hush," Zondra told him, not looking at him. "It appears we may be involved but through no fault of our own." Zondra put her hand on Carina's elbow leading her to the door of the house. "We should probably charge him extra."

"He can't afford us," Carina told Zondra as they left the house.

Chuck found himself standing there alone. "What in the hell just happened?"

A/N: *turns to camera and sips tea* Statler and Waldorf gonna Statler and Waldorf…What? You want a peak at next time….FIIINNNNNEEEE

Again, Sarah found herself in the backseat of the SUV, sitting beside Chuck, and she noticed him constantly wiping his hands on his jeans. She didn't know what to say to him. Guilt was eating her for what she said. He was allowed to grief however he wanted to, but what he did wasn't grieving. The thing was, she wasn't sure she had the right to say anything to him. She didn't know him like that.

Guuurrrrrllll….you DO know him like that. Sounds like maybe things work themselves out sooner rather than later, doesn't it? Come on back tomorrow and see what our heroes do. Take care of yourself fam.