Nagisa's a good student. He's always taken his education very seriously, and especially now that he's a teacher, he knows that certain tasks are set for a reason and he would do nothing to dispute that. However, he feels just a little bit out of his league with this. He sits there, prepared with his notebook and laptop on the desk in front of him, web browser already opened up in incognito mode.

He cringes, and types in the address of the only porn site he knows.

Immediately his eyes are assaulted with naked bodies and neon orange t. He almost wants to coil away and shield his vision. But, with this arrangement, he knows he signed up to do that and worse with Karma. Maybe if there weren't so many breasts jiggling right in his face. It was obnoxious. Still, he soldiers on, knowing at least that these kind of sites have filters.

He clicks on the categories tab, and frankly he's a little concerned at some of the names. He tries to look over them, though, eventually finding the safety of the word 'blowjobs'. That's pretty much the goal, so Nagisa winces again before clicking. There's still an unsettling amount of breasts, but there's also some close up penises in the mix now. He's not entirely sure that's a good thing.

Nagisa knows he can't be picky here, so he clicks on the first video, creatively titled '18 year old w/ huge tits gets cum shot'. It starts right in the middle of the action, at least, and from the angle it's clear the guy is holding the camera himself. It's focused on the woman, large pink lips stretched almost comically wide around his penis.

"You like that baby? You like the way I suck your big hard cock?"

Do people actually get off to this? Nagisa's actually glad Karma didn't say anything like that to him. Well, his mouth had been a little busy… Not that it's bothering the woman in the video, clearly. The idea of saying something like that… Nagisa's not sure he's capable of it. Definitely not capable of doing it whilst giving a blowjob.

He's not doing this for fun, though, so he grips his pen with vigour and attempts to write something. She definitely seems to be going for speed, in fact her bobbing is kind of frantic, her expressions completely lewd. Nagisa wonders if that's an important factor, facial expression. He remembers how hot it made him feel, when Karma was staring up at him. He looked nothing like this woman, though.

She's almost erratic where Karma was kind of… sensual. Maybe some people like it like this. The gears in Nagisa's mind start to spin, though. Karma probably just showed him the way he liked it, that's what makes the most sense to him at least. So maybe watching this kind of thing isn't really that helpful anyway.

"I want it in my pussy-"

Nagisa clicks off the video immediately. An unpleasant chill goes through his body, and he can only call it 'shame'. The truth is, Nagisa's not really a porn kind of guy. The idea of it hadn't ever really appealed to him anyway, but even if it had, with how strict his mother was, there was no way he would have gotten away with watching it as a teenage boy. And now he's older… there's more important things on his mind.

He still feels like he needs more instruction, though. Perhaps a porn website isn't the right place. Visual learning can be good… but he knows it's not really genuine. He doubts anyone is there for much more than a paycheque. So book learning, then. Back to basics. Since Nagisa's internet history is already destroyed forever, it almost doesn't matter when he types 'how to give a blowjob' into the search bar.

Nagisa's not sure if 'googling it' was the route Karma had been intending him to take, but what worked worked, right?

Admittedly, he's not quite sure about some of the articles that pop up either. He scrolls a little, before his eyes set on something. Wikihow. Sure, it might not be the most glamorous of all websites, but as general advice goes it's a pretty good option. It doesn't seem like much of the information is being blown out of proportion for spectacle.

As Nagisa reads through it, some things definitely make sense to him, given what he knows having experienced it. This is what he needs, a break down of points, and without the awful overbearing moaning, it's easier to write his notes. Honestly, it actually seems not that difficult. Just a suction kind of motion… plus some of the other stuff Karma showed him like kissing and licking.

There's two things that stand out to Nagisa. One of those things is the constant insistence of no teeth, a constant even when he clicks through a couple of other articles. A small amount of shame washes over him. If anything, that had been the best part. Maybe he's some kind of sexual freak or deviant. Even Karma said it didn't feel good… so he won't be trying it.

The second thing is this: gag reflex.

It's the biggest problem he could probably think up independently, too. He'd only seen Karma naked that first time, and he hadn't been thinking it then, but he's not confident he can fit it in his mouth. He stares at himself in the mirror for a moment, opening it like he's trying to impersonate a fish. It doesn't really look like peak sexiness.

Maybe he should just call it quits. But that doesn't sit quite right with Nagisa at all. He is not a quitter. But he is going to need to do something about this. Technique won't really help him if he's not sure he can get it all in. Clearly, that's leading to one thing. He needs practise. But, well, he can't exactly do that effectively.

Nagisa closes his notebook. There's only so much he can do in one day, otherwise his brain will be overwhelmed. He's honestly confused about what he's so worried for… Karma's been clear that he knows just how inexperienced Nagisa is.

It does start playing on his mind, though.

As much as Nagisa relies on meals he can buy from the konbini, he does still have to buy normal food at the actual supermarket too, every now and then. He doesn't have any kind of normal grocery schedule, but it always seems to land around the latter part of the week. Honestly it's not the most interesting shopping ever, considering the contents of his basket are currently rice, a bag of frozen gyoza, and a tube of mayonnaise. He's beside the fish counter, debating if he should just eat some premade sushi for dinner, when he hears it.

"Fish, fish, fish
If you eat fish
Your head, your head, your head,
Your head will become good."

He frowns, the upbeat music almost hurting his ears. Nagisa's far too young to be bitter with life, and he loves his job and his students, but after a long day at work it's a little too overwhelming and cheerful. It also doesn't help that it seems to be coming from a stereo made in the nineties, and at maximum volume. He retreats to vegetable and fruit section, before his ears start to hurt, though he's not unaware that it's kind of stuck in his head now.

Maybe he eats a few too many ready made meals, but Nagisa's definitely not unhealthy. Actually, he would usually have gone for the fresh food first, since it's in the of the shop, but he'd had to turn his head away in shame and go right to the other side.

To put it simply, they all look kind of like penises.

He'd utterly failed at keeping his research out of his head. If anything, the more he tries not to think about it, the more it's on his mind. He's not sure he's ever going to be able to eat a cucumber again, without thinking about it. Had he really gone through his life without realising how so many things were phallic shaped?!

He gets a horrific idea, though, one that worms its way into the back of his mind. If he needs practical practise, and can't use a real one, and there's something right here that looks - at least in his brain right now – like a perfectly good substitute… Nagisa can't believe he's really thinking about doing this, but what other choice does he have?

Nagisa stares at his options. The carrot is perhaps more appropriately themed, but the cucumber is bigger in both senses. It's not like he stopped to take a measurement of how big Karma is, but it's definitely not carrot sized. But… the cucumber looks so intimidating. He can't exactly ask the shop staff which vegetable most accurately represents a penis so he can practise not choking to death before the weekend, though.

Before he dies of embarrassment right then and there, he tosses a classic bunch of bananas into his basket and doesn't look back. They look about the right size, but Nagisa had been distracted at the time. He hadn't had a chance to really measure it. Not that he wants to. That just seems… embarrassing to say the least.

Buying a bunch of bananas isn't exactly what qualifies as strange activity, Nagisa knows, but he feels guilty when the cashier's handling them. As though she can read his mind and tell exactly what he's planning to do with them. She doesn't say anything, though, aside from asking if he has a point card (he doesn't, but he's been meaning to get one. Not today, though).

He puts the bananas in the kitchen sink when he gets back home, vowing to wash them thoroughly before he does anything with them. Also, it helps that they're out of sight, though he can't stop thinking about it as he eats dinner, and after too once he's had a shower and changed into his pyjamas. Nagisa wonders, if he's this nervous now, how is he going to survive their lesson?

He sits in front of the mirror again, since he's established that facial expression is important. May as well try and hone both skills at once. It feels ridiculous, but he's comforted by the open notebook at his side. A reminder that this is only for academic purposes. If only he'd had the chance to write stuff down whilst Karma was demonstrating it…

Nagisa takes the end of the unpeeled banana into his mouth. Even though he'd washed it well, it tastes kind of gross. Then again, he's pretty sure doing this for real isn't going to taste pleasant, either. The girth of it isn't uncomfortable, exactly, and it's not like his mouth is stretched beyond its limits. He takes that as a positive sign, before working it in.

It feels like he expected it to, honestly. There's a slightly heavy weight on his tongue, and trying to fold his lips over his teeth like the Wikihow article told him to feels a little awkward and difficult. He perseveres, though, until he feels very uncomfortable. With dismay, he realises that the banana isn't even that far in yet. He's barely even gone half way!

Nagisa pushes it further, before a horrible feeling crawls up his throat and he just about manages to pull it out in time for him to splutter and joke. Yes, he realises, the gag reflex really is no joke. It's not like Nagisa's ever purposely tried to make himself throw up before, especially like that, but it really doesn't feel comfortable. It'll be embarrassing if he throws up on Karma's dick.

From what he's read, the art of 'deep throating' is something gained by practice, and isn't even necessary to give a good blowjob. But, Karma did it to him, and he feels a little competitive. Unfortunately, the more he tries, the quicker he feels the urge to hurl. Even when he looks up a couple of techniques, they don't help that much. Squeezing his thumb doesn't seem to do anything, and when told to 'think of something else', the only thing he can think of is 'fish, fish, fish, if you eat fish…'.

So maybe that's for a later date, but there's other things he needs to try. And maybe it needs to come from himself, this time. What had been so hot about it? He lets the banana go in disgrace, and flops down onto his bed. The clearest thing he can think of is the simplest one: Karma looked like he was having a good time, like he was enjoying it. Physically it had felt incredible, but it was the way he'd looked at him that had Nagisa's toes curling.

Even at the memory, Nagisa feels something stir in his lower stomach. Can he really do this? He ends up turning to his side, unwilling to face the reality of being turned on right now. There's too much to worry about, and his stomach is all in knots. He decides to try and get some sleep, at least, and deeply tries to remind himself that there's more going on in his life than just this.

Unsurprisingly, he feels nervous on his way over to Karma's place. This time, he knows something's going to happen. There's no denying that in less than an hour, he'll probably have Karma's erection in his mouth. Of course he's freaking out a little. For once, he'd actually managed to find a seat on the train, so he's sitting, elbows tight with his phone in front of his eyes, as he tries to give some of the articles one last look over. Nagisa can hardly believe he's actually cram studying.

He's almost glad he is, though, when he reads what's practically in small print. This particular article isn't exactly well structured advice, it's more of a collection of comments given by random people, but one sticks out to him: 'In terms of the tongue, it's really not that different to kissing. Too much is bad, but if you've mastered the skills that come with that already, you'll be able to drive him crazy.'

Kissing, huh? Kissing he knows he can do, though admittedly he might be a little rusty considering how long it's been. Nagisa had been completely embarrassed about it at the time, but he'd actually outscored Karma in Bitch Sensei's weird test. Now he's a teacher, he's more than aware that 'kiss testing' isn't and should not be a thing, but hey, nothing about his education in 3E was typical.

"Hi," he says far too quickly, when Karma opens the door.

He looks a little taken aback. "Hey-"

Nagisa tries to hold his nerve, and steps into Karma's apartment, sliding his shoes off immediately. It seems like Karma hasn't done anything hugely productive with his day off, since he's dressed in highly casual loungewear. Or maybe he just doesn't care about anyone else's opinion. Knowing Karma, it really could be either.

"Let's go then-"

"Do you want a drink-"

They manage to say, at the exact same time. Does Nagisa sound too excited or something weird? He's not trying to be, but he wants to get this awkward part over as soon as possible. Nagisa's never been one for small talk, and he doesn't think Karma is either. Besides, alcohol probably isn't going to help his potential throwing up problem.

Karma just laughs lightly. "Okay then. Eager, huh, Nagisa~?"

He tries his best not to flinch and turn bright red. It's ridiculous, they're both adults here… He's used to Karma's teasing, but this time it makes him feel self conscious. It had been fun, last week, after they'd just relaxed and watched a movie. This nervous build up… it's even stronger than it had been all week. At least Karma doesn't waste time, directing him past the living room and straight to the bedroom.

The bedroom feels more formal, somehow. But so does this entire situation, now that there's clear intent involved. Nagisa's aware that the both of them know exactly what's about to happen. Karma's room, when he slides the door open, is relatively tidy. It looks like documents from work have been dumped unceremoniously in the corner, and of course there's a bunch of random stuff strewn around (apparently they're organised), but at least the bed is made.

They both sit down on it, and the air between them is strange. Maybe it was easier, when he didn't know what's about to happen between them. Well, the only thing Nagisa can do is look ahead, lock onto his target and go for it. Unfortunately, his target happens to be hidden by Karma's trousers right now. He should fix that.

Unable to stand the silence anymore, Nagisa gets to his feet and turns, right in front of where Karma's sitting, as he sinks down to the floor. He feels even more nervous, as he looks up at Karma like that, but now he knows he has to go through with it.

"You should take these off," he says, eyeing the trousers.

Karma complies without argument, hooking his thumbs underneath the waistband to pull both them and his underwear off. He shimmies them down his legs easily, before kicking them completely off, discarded. Nagisa swallows deeply, feeling tiny once again even though Karma's the one exposed right now.

He can't help staring at it. Nagisa hasn't done anything yet, but it's already hardening up. Perhaps he should be complimented by that, if only the nerves weren't growing by the second. From this angle at least, it does look pretty big to him. It, too, appears to be growing, as if he's not intimidated enough. Now's as good a time as any, he figures, and shifts forward.

"Wait," Karma says. "We should get a condom."

Nagisa frowns. "Why? You didn't use one."

Karma's hand rubs down his face. "I probably should've, though. You should still use protection… for STDs and stuff."

He tilts his head. "Are you saying you have an STD?"

"No!" He says, perhaps fast enough that Nagisa might have been suspicious if the context was different.

"It's fine, then?" He gives Karma a curious look.

It twitches. Huh.

"It's fine. Are you sure about this?" Karma asks, which seems like a strange question since Nagisa's already down on his knees.

Nagisa blinks in response. "Why wouldn't I be?"

It looks as though Karma's restraining himself, which leaves Nagisa pleased in an odd primal sense. He makes sure he's standing on his knees, before moving forward. His erection is close, now, and he knows he has to just go for it.

"You should always ask…"

Nagisa grips him, then, with more confidence than he ever thought was possible. "Can I go now?"

"Y-yes. Yes."

He doesn't waste his time. According to all of Nagisa's research, it's best to start with teasing, to work his way up with the pleasure. That's what Karma did to him too, building and building. For some reason, though, Nagisa doesn't want to do that. Ideally, he wants to sweep Karma off his feet, to take him out completely, if he's even capable of doing that.

So, Nagisa decides to go for it, taking him as deeply as he can. Admittedly, the angle is different and a little more difficult than his practise, but it's not long before the same uncomfortable feeling grows in the back of his throat. Shamefully, he definitely doesn't have it all in his mouth, but this is what he did extra reading for! He makes up the rest of the space with his hand, and tries to focus on making sure he can still breathe before his first attempt at suction.

Karma gasps, when he does it, and Nagisa almost feels glee. He decides to take it one step further, giving his head an experimental bob. There's a lot to think about, actually, and he's so focused on making sure he keeps his teeth in check that he can't do anything fancy, or really do anything about the way he looks, which he'd even established to himself was important. He's doing it, though. He's definitely giving Karma a blowjob.

It doesn't exactly feel romantic.

Not that he wanted it to! Or expected it to! Nagisa just… with the way that people talk so often about sex, he maybe thought there would be more to it. Karma's erection is heavier than the banana was, and tastes somewhat better, too – not good, though, it's just like… extra salty skin. Not that Nagisa… often tastes skin. It's no revelation, it's exactly what he imagined it would feel like. Is it normal, to feel somewhat disconnected?

He does want to keep going, though. Mostly it's for himself, but he kind of wants to prove that he can do this. Also, it feels a little unfair that Karma so easily took him apart before. There's a competitive spirit rising up within him. He doesn't want to just give Karma an inexperienced sloppy barely passing attempt.

He's pretty sure this isn't how Bitch Sensei had intended her techniques to be used (he tries not to think too much about her, though), but that one article does come back to him. The first stage he starts the next time he takes as much of Karma in as possible. Previously, his tongue had been flat, but he decides to try introducing it.

Karma doesn't moan, or anything, but he's pretty certain he breathes a little heavier. That's good. Multitasking really is difficult, but he tries his best to incorporate his tongue as much as he can, and as he gets more used to it, he can concentrate on what he's doing with it. He tries a few licking motions, dragging his tongue along the understand of Karma's erection, which is finally rewarded with a groan kind of sound. That means it felt good, doesn't it?

"Karma?" Nagisa pulls off. "Is it okay?"

Karma's eyes contain the fire of a madman, when he finally looks up at him. "Don't stop."

Like a match held close to a candle wick, Nagisa lights up too. Distinct, deep heat blooms in his stomach. Karma sounds… desperate, and it's not something Nagisa gets to see often. He's not sure exactly why that's turning him on, but he doesn't have time to dissect it. There's a new energy thrumming through him. He wants to make Karma desperate, to make him call out and beg.

He elects to do exactly what Karma did, and takes only the head between his lips. It's a much more manageable size, and Nagisa can make proper use of his tongue. Granted, it really isn't the same as kissing at all, but he figures he can apply the basic theory. Or, it appears he definitely can, because this time Karma practically writhes as moans.

He's… enjoying this, actually. Nagisa hadn't expected to, but it's good. He finally gains the confidence to look up, and finds Karma's gaze fixed right on him. It takes everything he has, but he holds his gaze with the next lick, wanting to read his reaction fully. Karma's lips fall open and a heavy sigh/moan escapes. His fists, though, are clenched into the blanket as he tries to ground himself with something.

For once in his life, Nagisa feels kind of powerful and he's revelling in it. He's making Karma this way, all on his own. Nagisa finds, then, that he doesn't have to morph his face to look like he's enjoying it, he genuinely is. He's pretty into it now, as he tries sliding more of the length inside again, but there's still a part of him capable of feeling a little embarrassment about the sudden tightness of his trousers.

Nagisa's concentrating too hard to do anything about it, so he just squeezes his thighs together for some relief as he attempts to speed up. Karma's breathing seriously hard, now, and Nagisa's starting to take note of what's causing the strongest reaction. In fact, he decides he might actually write it down, after this. So far, it's definitely the licking motions, reminiscent of the kiss of death, that seem to be working the best. Karma straight up jolts, when he pays attention to the tip in particularly, so Nagisa assumes he's pretty sensitive there.

As fun as it is, though, Nagisa's jaw is starting to get a little sore. Also, with the added enthusiasm, the danger of choking starts to reappear. For a moment, Nagisa worries that it's too much, but then a hand fixes in his hair and it feels incredible. Nagisa can't help himself, not with the arousal already shooting through him, and he moans around Karma.

"Nagisa," Karma responds in kind.

He looks up at him, and his eyes are screwed shut, head properly tilted back. It's almost a little vulnerable, and more than enough motivation for Nagisa to push through the slight pain and keep going with everything he has. He tries moaning again, and that seems to do the exact trick, his own toes curling up.

"C-close," Karma chokes, pulling at his hair. "Nagisa-"

For a moment, Nagisa just keeps going, not really comprehending the meaning of the warning. But then, whatever small amount logic he has left within him wakes up, and he realises what Karma's trying to tell him. If Nagisa doesn't stop, Karma's going to come right into his mouth. Through it all, that isn't something he's prepared for. He doesn't exactly have much of a chance to think about it, so he lets Karma's erection slide out immediately.

Except, Nagisa happens to pull away literally as Karma starts to come. For just a split second, Nagisa gets to enjoy the fact that he got Karma off, the deep throaty moan he lets out music to his ears. But then the fires of hell itself start to burn in his eye, and he's blinded. On top of that, there's an unpleasant splattering sensation across his entire face.

Actually, Nagisa shrieks, because just half a second later and the pain is unbearable. He's too afraid to even try and open his eye, in case it falls straight out or something. This hadn't been in any of the articles. Definitely not in the porn. He wishes he'd just swallowed it, surely that would have been better than the burning.

"Nagisa?" He hears Karma say, concern lacing his tone.

All he's capable of producing is an extremely pained whimper.

"Oh," Karma seems to figure it out, then, and quickly grabs him by the arm, yanking him to his feet.

He's still not brave enough to open his eye, so he lets Karma drag him, until he hears the sound of running water and his head is practically shoved down into the sink. He gets the idea of that, at least, and finally opens his eye again. He's horrified that there appears to be a film over his eye, completely distorting his view of the world.

Nagisa understands what he has to do, though, and starts desperately trying to rinse the eye out. The water does absolutely nothing to soothe the excruciating burning, though, if anything it's still getting worse by the second. A slightly ironic voice in the back of his head reminds him that at the very least he's definitely learnt something today.

"I'm sorry," Karma eventually says, and Nagisa's vision has returned just enough to notice he's redressed his lower half at least. "But, I did warn you."

He just groans in pain, he doesn't want to hear it.

"Did you get it out?" Karma tries.

Nagisa turns off the tap and stands upright again. "It still hurts."

"It's going to," Karma holds out a wet cloth, but instead of handing it to him, he just wipes down the side of his face, and it occurs to Nagisa that he probably got semen in more than just his eye. "Hold this on it,

"Might?"

Karma shrugs. "I don't know, I'm not a doctor."

They end up sitting down in the living room in awkward silence, with Nagisa pressing the compress to his eye. At least the living room sofa is much more neutral territory. He tries to think of something, anything, to take his mind off the pain. For some horrifying reason, the only thing his brain can come up with is: 'fish, fish, fish. If you eat fish…'.

"It was pretty good other than that," Karma eventually says. "Once you got into it. For your first time, anyway."

"Thanks," Nagisa responds, because honestly he has nothing else to say. At least he knows he did a good job.

Karma swallows. "I still think you need more practise though. And you really need to stop quicker, if I warn you like that."

He puts the compress down, his eye still stinging but at least a little better. "Same time next week, then?"

Karma looks a little taken aback.

"What is it?"

"Your eye…"

Nagisa rushes back to the bathroom immediately, and stares hopelessly in the mirror. It's honestly a little horrifying, to see just how red his eye is. It looks like he just got punched, or else some kind of crazy infection. That's not going to happen though, right?! He really should have read up more, because he feels completely out of his depth.

"How long will it stay?" He asks in a panic. He doesn't want to go home like this, and he certainly doesn't want to go to school like this.

Karma has the nerve to laugh. "I don't know. It's never happened to me."

"Huh?" This isn't common, then? Nagisa just screwed up?

"I usually just swallow," Karma says nonchalantly.

Great. Nagisa's a little confused by that for a moment, though. He supposes it should have occurred to him, given the performance last week, that Karma's definitely done this before. They don't talk about their individual love lives. Or, well, sex lives. Nagisa knows that Karma dated some foreign exchange student guy for a bit during university, but he never met him.

Karma being into guys had been a really irrelevant fact in the back of his mind for a while. There hadn't been any direct confession or anything like that, so Nagisa had just shrugged it off. He'd been too focused on his own life. This is the first time he's really thought about it, admittedly. Has Karma ever been with a woman?

Nagisa knows it's not the right time to ask, though. Honestly, he's never considered himself as being into guys. But, he's never been into anybody. Logically, he knows he was turned on by this, and the last two times too. He's not sure what that makes him.

"I can't go out like this," he chooses to say, rather than the torrent of strange emotions. He can unpack those later.

Karma looks at him funny. "I might have some sunglasses?"

It's night time already, but looking kind of crazy seems better than looking infected. So he nods, and accepts his fate. At least, the sunglasses are pretty nice. Karma has a highly paying job, he thinks, so he can afford nice things like this. Even if currently, they're making him look absolutely ridiculous.

"Thank you for the lesson," he says politely, because what else is there to say? "I'll… do a lot better next time."

Karma blinks. "Sure. I'll see you."

He holds the door open, and Nagisa practically scurries out. He's sure the entire embarrassment of the situation really will hit him the moment he gets home, when he's alone. Thankfully, he knows he'll be better off dealing with it alone, and the quicker that happens, the better.

"Wait," Karma calls, sticking his head out of the door. "You passed."

Perhaps it's a little pathetic that Nagisa feels a small beam of joy.

You can find the fish song by searching: 'sakana sakana sakana' into youtube probably.