Before you read, some of these jokes are original, some came from word of mouth from various sources. If I could cite credit, I would. Nevertheless, isn't it fun when it features our characters? READ at your own risk! Thank you guys for your ongoing support. Keep laughing! Enjoy!

Short Story #1

At a family breakfast the following conversation takes place between Hisashi and his ten year old son, Izuku.

"Daddy, what are those big round things on Mommy's chest," asked Izuku as his doe eyes were pointing at his father.

Hisashi needed to think fast. No way he wanted his son to be exposed to the opposite sex just yet. He snapped his answer when figuring a quick solution. "They're balloons, Icchan!"

"Balloons? What for?"

"When the time comes for Mommy to go see Jesus, we can blow them up and she will float to heaven."

Izuku put down his chopstick. "Really, Dad?"

Hisashi patted his chest. "Yes, son!" He sipped his coffee in hopes that his son can move on.

Izuku took a sip from his orange juice. "Balloons! Really? Can you explain why Uncle Toshi came by yesterday and blowing Mommy's chest up?"

"Uncle Toshi?"

"Yeah! I saw Uncle Toshi blowing Mommy's chest up yestersay and Mommy kept saying, 'Oh, God, I am coming.'" Izuku put his finger to his lip before turning to the startled father. "But, she didn't float anywhere!"

Short Story #2

Itsuka rushed into their classroom late that morning. They were met by her angry teacher, Kayama-sensei.

"Kendou," she asked sternly as she tapped her whip on her desk. "Could you explain on why you were late this morning?"

She was startled. More so of the whip than the explanation of her tardiness. Kayama-sensei raised her eyebrow. "Shall you talk or shall the whip do the talking?"

Itsuka swallowed the lump in her throat as she was timid to speak. The redhead nervously looked at her teacher to explain her reason for her tardiness. "I was late because I was coming from Emerald Hill."

"Emerald Hill?"

"Yes, ma'am."

Kayama-sensei lowered her whip. "Alright, Kendou! I guess you get a pass. Have a seat. Don't let it happen again."

Itsuka nodded and rushed to her seat.

Five minutes later, the classroom slid open and walked another tardy student. Momo lowered her head down to the floor as she was nervous on what Kayama-sensei was going to say.

"Yaoyorozu-san! I'd expect better from the vice president of this junior high to be late!" She glared at the black-haired teen. "Shall you explain your whereabouts?!"

Momo yelped like a meek church mouse. Momo blushed as she didn't want to answer.

"Yaoyorozu! Shall you speak or let the whip speak for you!"

"I was coming from Emerald Hill," she said quickly before covering her mouth.

It was met with tiny laugh before Kayama-sensei stopped it. She sighed heavily as she didn't want this to carry throughout class. "Because this is your first offense, I would let it slide. See to it that it doesn't happen again, Vice President!"

"Yes, ma'am!" Momo rushed to her seat, putting her head down from the embarrassment.

Believing that the interruptions has ceased, Kayama-sensei resumed her lesson. It wasn't until ten minutes later when the door slid open once again. This time it was Ibara.

"Shiozaki!" At this time, Kayama-sensei's whip snapped which caused the class to immediately become silent. "I have had had it with the interruptions! Where have you've been. And I hope to your God that you weren't from Emerald Hill."

Ibara blanked twice, nervously turning her head away before Kayama-sensei took her chin to have her undivided attention. Ibara spoke. "I wasn't coming from Emerald Hill. I will admit that I was on my knees praying to Emerald Hill."

"God!" Kayama-sensei's eyes became fiery. She snapped her whip which cracked a book in half. "Shiozaki, you will spend part of lunch carrying pail and whatever Hail Mary's you have to do."

Ibara didn't speak but bowed as she walked back to her desk.

Before the Pro Hero could turn, the door opened. As she was about to use her whip, she saw that it was the principal.

She relieved herself. "Principal Aizawa!" She bowed to her. "What presence do you have to come here on this fine morning?"

"Well, I wanted to inform you that you have a new student joining you today, Kayama-sensei," informed the principal. "Sweetheart, would you please step inside?"

The class went silent when seeing the handsome teen entering the classroom. He was shy, keeping his emerald hair hiding his eyes. "Good morning, you all."

"I think you can take it from here," said the principal before darting away.

"Well, dear. Care to introduce yourself?"

The new student nodded. "My name is Izuku Midoriya." He bowed to the students. "Nice to meet you. I hope that you treat me well."

Kayama-sensei put her finger to her lip out of curiosity. "Midoriya! I like that name. What does it stand for?"

"Emerald Hill."

Short Story #3

It is the first day of school as Principal Nezu stands in front of the incoming freshmen at the auditorium. Standing firm, he addresses the students about some of the rules he hopes that they would attain and respect.

"Okay, the female dorms are off-limits for all male students," said Nezu sternly. "And the same will go for the male dorms for all female students."

It is met with awws, sighs, and boos before being immediately hushed by the principal.

"Anyone who is caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 for the first time," says the principal. "Anyone who is caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60. And if anyone breaks this rule for the third time will be fined $200. Understood?"

"Yes, Principal," says the crowd.

"Thank you! Are there any questions?"

A male student raises his hand from the crowd.

"Yes, sir," says Principal Nezu.

"Yes, sir! Mineta! Class 1-A. I have a question."

"I may have an answer. Shoot!"

"How much for a season pass?"

Short Story #4 (Warning: the ending is a bit risque and graphic. Just giving you a head's up.)

Katsuki was worried as he felt something was wrong with his penis after having an encounter with Tsuyu from the previous night. He decided to go to a doctor's office to get it checked out.

As he entered the crowded office, he went to the receptionist. The receptionist cracked a smile and asked, "Yes, sir. How can I help you?"

"There is something wrong with my dick, ma'am," he said worriedly.

The shocked receptionist replied, "You shouldn't come inside a crowded office like that, young man. That is quite rude of you."

"Forgive me," cried Katsuki. "It's just my dick...something is wrong with it and I think I need to get it checked out, miss."

"We don't use that kind of language at this clinic," said the receptionist as she pointed at the door. "Step outside and try again. This time, tell me when you return that something is wrong with your ear, nose, or something."

"Yes, ma'am." Katsuki followed her orders and stepped out of the clinic. A few minutes later, he returned to the clinic and faced the receptionist.

The receptionist smiled smugly to Katsuki "Good afternoon, sir. Welcome to our clinic, what can I do for you."

Katsuki answered, "Yes, ma'am. I think something is wrong with my 'nose'."

The receptionist nodded approvingly. "And what is the matter with your 'nose', sir?"

He peered closer to the receptionist. "Is it normal for your 'nose' to seep pus?"

Apologies once again! I hope you have read the warning beforehand.

Short Story #5 (As seen on a previous joke story involving RWBY)

Note: this is a marriage joke involving a woman proposing to a man. Very atypical!

Izuku Midoriya and Ochako Uraraka were only eleven years old, but they knew that they were very much in love. So much so that Ochako proposed to Izuku in front of their favorite sycamore tree. She wasn't able to get an expensive ring but settled for a plastic ring from a vending machine at the toy store. Izuku was delighted, kissing her as a token of his appreciation. One day, Ochako decided to ask Izuku's father, Hisashi, for his hand in marriage. She waited until Hisashi was alone to bravely ask the tall, brawn man.

"Mr. Midoriya," said Ochako. "I would like to propose your son's hand in marriage."

Hisashi crossed his legs. He thought it was the cutest thing the brunette produced out of her mouth. He removed his glasses, asking Ochako to have a seat on the couch. He took a deep breath before responding to Ochako's question. "Well, Ochako, that is a tough proposition. Think you are ready for marriage?"

She nodded in agreement. "Yes, sir. Izuku and I are really much in love. I even proposed to him in front of your sycamore tree."

Hisashi tried hard to contain his laughter. "So, Ochako. You want to marry my son?"

"Yes, sir!"

"You kids are only eleven. What are you going to do for a place to live?"

She reached into her pocket. Astonishingly, she pulled a pair of glasses. She was reading from the note. "We were thinking with me, sir. I live in the suburbs. My room is bigger. Also, we have lots of groceries and my parents are hardworkers so, he would be well taken care of."

Hisashi still thought this was adorable. He decided to take another poke at her. "You did your homework, young lady. Smart."

"Thank you, sir."

"So, you have thought of living arrangments." He peered closer to the young girl. "What about a job? How can you support my dashing son without having the support of your own?"

Ochako quickly interjected. "Never you worry, sir. I am a fee collector for the local newspaper. I make $100 a week. So, that makes $400 a month. Plus, I even work around the house and get an allowance." She smiled. "That way, even if Izuku doesn't work, he will be in great hands."

Mr. Midoriya was puzzled. He scratched under his chin. No way this girl calculated these plans without a sibling, a parent, or a relative giving her these ideas. As a Trump card, he thought of something that should stump the lad's thinking.

"Well, Ochako. You have thought long and hard about this decision. You must really love my son?"

"I do, sir. Very, very much."

"Just one more question. If you can get this, you can have my son."

The glowing smile of Ochako was apparent. "Yes, sir. Ask away."

"What would you do if the two of you decided to have little ones of your own." He thought he was clever. "What should you do about that?"

Ochako just shrugged ers shoulder and told Izuku's father. "Well, sir. We've been lucky this far. My friend, Momo gives me these things that are made of plastic. I think they are called rubbers?" Ochako stopped when she saw Hisashi lying on the ground.

"Sir, sir? Oh, dear, he fainted."

Short Story #6

Izuku was sitting outside of his front porch when an upset Katsuki approached him. Katsuki pointed to his face, which showed a reddened handprint.

"Ouch," said Izuku. "You and Mina got into a fight?!"

"Yeah," said Katsuki. "I don't know why. I was only following her instructions." Katsuki pulled out his cell phone and logged onto Facebook. He gave it to Izuku to read it.

"Katsukihelpmyspacebarbrokecanyoucomeoverandgivemeanalternative"

Katsuki scoffed as he rubbed his wound. "I wish she could have told me what ternative means," he said to himself.

Short Story #7

It was the decision of Hisashi to tease his wife, Inko in a joking manner. One day, he decided to grab Inko's breasts as she climbed into the shower.

Hisashi whistled. "You know, Inko, if these breasts were firm, you wouldn't need a bra!"

"Rude, Hisashi," she said angrily when closing the curtain.

A few minutes later, Hisashi decided to have a little fun again. As Inko stepped out of the shower, he decided to grab her butt.

Hisashi whistled. "You know, Inko, if your ass was firm, you wouldn't need a girdle!"

Inko slapped his hand. "What is wrong with you, Hisashi?!"

Hisashi laughed away as he left out of the bathroom. Two blows was enough for Inko. She decided to have a little payback since he enjoyed teasing.

It was the next day when Hisahi was stepping out of the shower when Inko grabbed Hisashi's dick.

Inko whistled. "You know, Hisashi, if this dick of yours was firm, then I wouldn't need our son!"

Short Story #8

Enji was listening to Green Day on the radio while reading RWBY when Rei snuck behind him. She furrowed her face at her husband before hitting him with a frying pan.

"What the hell, dear," he scoffed. "What was that for?"

"That was for the piece of paper in your pocket with the name Tomoko written on it," she barked at him.

"Dear," he said calmly. "Tomoko is the name of the horse I betted on when I went to the race track last week."

She was a bit skeptic, but she knew that Enji was an avid horse racing fan. "You are sure?"

"Yes, dear."

"Are you sure?"

"Dear, on my Mama, I am telling the truth."

Rei grabbed her husband and held him. "Okay, since you said you haven't cheated and you put it on your mother's life."

A couple of days later, Enji was doing his routine of listening to rock and reading manga when Rei once again hit him with a frying pan.

"What the hell," barked Enji. "What's that for this time?"

"Your horse rang," she said. "Oh, and your mother's dead."

Short Story #9

Izuku and Nemuri Midoriya were reported to their daughter's school for a parent-teacher conference over a risque essay their daughter had written for class.

"Mr. and Mrs. Midoriya," said their teacher. "I am having concerns regarding the things that occur in the household."

The Midoriya's stared before Izuku decided to speak. "Our daughter is quite pragmatic and very curious about the world. She can't help what she sees."

The teacher displayed a paper. "Explain last week's assignment to me please. We were doing a topic on heroes.

My Daddy Is A Hero!

My Daddy is a hero because he saved my Mommy from going to heaven. My Mommy would be dead if my Daddy wouldn't be so brave.

It happened last week. I could hear my Mommy scream in the bedroom. "Oh God, Oh God, I am coming! Oh God, I am coming!" I was so scared. I don't want my Mommy to die.

I ran into my parents' bedroom. Her legs were sticking straight up in the air. God tried to pull her up, but Daddy was on her and pushed her back. He pushed her so many times until God had to let her go.

That is why my Daddy is my hero.

The End!

"Quite poor representation," said the teacher.

"Oh, my God," said Izuku. "I am terribly sorry!"

"Yes, I agree," said Nemuri. "Not as accurate. For that was Daddy that was screaming for Jesus!"

Short Story #10

Katsuki and Izuku were spending the day cleaning the pool at the community center when Katsuki brought up sex as a topic.

"My favorite position is the rodeo position," said the spiky-haired blonde.

"Haven't really heard of that before," said Izuku admittedly. "What is it?"

Feeling prideful, Katsuki answered. "Well, Deku. I will use me and my girl, Kyoka as an example. Get her on all four and hit it from the back. As you are pounding it, grab her breasts and say, 'these feel like your mother's' and see if you can hold on to her for more than eight seconds without falling over."

To be continued….