Ch. 58- Upper Yard
One Piece © Oda
Blizzard, Monkey D. Aika, Kumi, Kovar, and Monkey D. Star © Me
Shade © Gakuto1991
Author's Note: Okay, I know what people are gonna say: I'm late again, but I can't help that. It takes a lot of work to dish these chapters out and sometimes, I miss the deadline.
And another thing: I'm waiting for Wano to finish, that's why I haven't started on it, yet. I was gonna try and do Stampede in the meantime, but for some reason, I seemed to lack the motivation to watch that one. So, until Wano is over, I'm gonna be focusing on my other stories, so I ask that you be patient a little bit longer.
Please enjoy this chapter I finally finished tonight.
"So in the end, Conis never really had a choice, did she?" asked Chopper as the Straw Hats once again stood within the black void. "No wonder she broke down crying."
"We thought that this place would be a paradise," said Sanji. "The moment we figured out what was really going on, we realized it was anything but."
"Seems to happen a lot with us, doesn't it?" asked Blizzard. "The places we go to look nice, but then we find out what's happening behind the scenes and realize just how bad things actually are."
"Yeah, that always seems to be the case with us," Usopp replied. "Like this island, for example."
"Yeah, we just thought it was a small deserted island," Nami said, "but then we run into Kovar, and suddenly, here we are in Luffy's subconscious mind."
"Nothing is ever normal with us, huh?" Robin mused.
"Sometimes, abnormal things are okay," Zoro shrugged.
It was then that the memories started playing again, showing Past Luffy, Past Usopp, and Past Sanji riding down the Milky Road on The Crow.
"You think Conis is gonna be all right?" Past Usopp asked. "I mean, what if those White Berets find her? She wouldn't be in this predicament if it weren't for us! And I'm not sure if I trust that Sky Knight guy. Something about him gives me the creeps!"
"Usopp, how could you say that?!" Chopper questioned. "The Sky Knight's a hero!"
"Dude, you said that even though he helped you out, twice?" Franky asked. "That's cold."
"Well, we pretty much knew next to nothing about the guy!" Usopp argued. "I mean, I know he's good now! I was talking about then!"
"Ah, don't worry about it," Past Luffy spoke up. "That old guy might seem a little weird, but I don't think he's a bad guy."
"See?" Chopper asked. "Luffy gets it!"
"He always did have good judgment of people," Brook pointed out.
"It's not like we had a choice," said Past Sanji. "I wanted to be able to protect Conis, too, but she's probably better off going with the old man. If we brought her with us, we'd only be putting her in more danger."
"I guess you have a point," Past Usopp said. "Still...I almost wish I went with them...I mean, sacrificial altars, ordeals, and stuff? Just thinking about it gives me the creeps!"
"You know, Usopp, at this point, you kinda sound like a broken record," said Zoro.
"Oh, shut up!" Usopp argued.
At that moment, a gigantic forest soon appeared from the fog.
"Holy crap, where did that huge forest come from?!" Past Usopp questioned.
"Do you think that's Upper Yard?" asked Past Sanji while Past Usopp checked the map, just to be sure.
"Well, it does look like there's a forest," the sniper answered, "but nothing like this!"
"Whoever owned that map lived 200 years ago, right?" asked Past Sanji. "It's probably really old. It'd take centuries for a forest to grow this huge!"
"Wow...seeing these trees makes me feel like I'm home," Past Luffy grinned. "I kinda feel like climbing one!"
"He would feel nostalgic about the jungle," Nami mused.
"But seriously, this place is freakin' huge!" Franky exclaimed.
"Yeah, look at the size of those trees!" Kumi added. "The trees we saw back in Mt. Colbo are like toothpicks compared to these things!"
"Oh, look!" Past Luffy exclaimed as he pointed to a row of statues on the sides similar to the ones on Lovely Street, as well as large torches with cow skulls on them and spears. "I can see the entrance up ahead!"
"Well, Usopp," Past Sanji said, "if you wanna turn back, now's your last chance."
"Actually, I would like to go back, if you don't mind," Past Usopp answered.
"Too late!" Past Luffy exclaimed. "We're going in!"
"THEN WHY DID YOU EVEN ASK ME?!" Past Usopp questioned.
"...You weren't seriously thinking about leaving, were you?" asked Chopper.
"No!" Usopp answered. "I was just messing around! You know me!" He then chuckled nervously while Nami and Zoro glared at him, incredulously, causing him to gulp as he looked back at the memory where he could see his past self looking like he was getting ready to soil his overalls. The various cries of animals weren't helping, and as The Crow continued along the river of clouds, he gasped in horror upon seeing the shipwrecks that lined the riverbank.
"Whoa," Franky muttered. "What happened to them?"
"You'll see in a moment," Usopp answered with dread.
"Are you seeing this?!" Past Usopp questioned. "We're surrounded by shipwrecks!"
"Well, we are in a forest," Past Luffy said.
"WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?!" Past Usopp questioned.
"Ah, relax!" Past Luffy assured. "You find all sorts of things in the jungle, right?"
"NO!" Past Usopp cried as he grabbed the oars attached to the boat, giving one of them to Past Sanji. "QUICK! SPEED UP! GET US OUTTA HERE!"
"Why?!" Past Sanji asked. "What the hell do you think is gonna happen?!"
At that moment, Past Luffy finally noticed something come flying at them from the right, and as the Straw Hats looked themselves, they gasped upon seeing a huge scythe with a tribal mask on the side, swinging right toward them!
"AAH!" Nami shrieked.
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!" Franky questioned.
"SCARY!" Chopper cried.
"LOOK OUT!" Past Luffy yelled as they barely managed to escape by the seat of their pants...but as they looked up, they saw that it wasn't the only scythe that they had to avoid, for there were many waiting for them, preparing to slice them and their boat in half if they didn't watch themselves. Realizing the danger of the situation (for once), Past Luffy quickly ordered Past Usopp and Past Sanji to row the boat as fast as they possibly could while avoiding the scythes. As a confused Past Sanji asked what the hell was happening, one more scythe swung down in front of them.
"AAH!" Past Usopp cried. "LUFFY, HIT THE BRAKES! THERE'S ANOTHER ONE COMING RIGHT AT US!"
"NO, WE CAN'T STOP IN TIME!" Past Luffy shouted. "USOPP, QUICK! TAKE THE WHEEL!"
"WHAT?!" Past Usopp questioned.
"JUST DO IT!" Past Luffy yelled as they switched places, and soon after, he began to stretch his arms back. "GUM-GUUUUUM..."
"W-w-wait, Luffy, what are you doing?!" Past Usopp asked. "We're supposed to go the other way!"
"BAZOOKA!"
Using his stretchy arms, Past Luffy managed to launch the trio into the air, avoiding the scythe in the nick of time, and soon after, they paddled away as fast as they could.
"That was close!" said Aika.
"You're telling me," Sanji said. "That place was a freakin' headache! And the fatass we ran into after this was even worse!"
"What fatass?" asked Brook.
"Brook, Sanji, language," Nami chided.
"Oops," Sanji and Brook muttered as they covered their mouths.
"Uh...Aika, forget what you heard," said Sanji.
"What? Fata-MMPH!" Aika started, only for Sanji to cover her mouth.
"Yes, that one!" he cried while Nami gave him a death glare.
"Oh, man...look at that," Past Usopp said as he looked back and saw the entrance, way behind him. "The entrance is way back over there!"
"Should we get off here, then?" asked Past Sanji.
"Are you insane?!" Past Usopp questioned. "We'll be killed!"
"Yeah, I guess you're right about that," Past Sanji admitted, but then, something came leaping out of the cloud river, causing them to look up and see a giant eel-like creature with rows of serrated teeth!
"WHAT IN THE HELL IS THAT?!" Blizzard yelled in alarm.
"A GIANT SEA LAMPREY!" Chopper shouted.
"Whoa, is that a snake?!" Past Luffy asked, just as Past Sanji kicked it away.
"That was a lamprey," said Past Sanji. "It's a parasite that feeds off the blood of larger animals...although in this case, you might call it a Sky Lamprey."
"Oh...so I can't eat it, then?" Past Luffy asked as his stomach grumbled. "Too bad...I'm getting hungry."
"Is food all you ever think about, stupid?!" Past Sanji asked before he looked away. "This Milky Road is bad news...if we hang around here much longer, we're doomed. Let's just keep going and hope we find Nami and Robin, soon."
"Hey, what about me?!" Chopper asked.
"I meant you and Moss-head, too!" Sanji reassured. "Calm down!"
"What a moron," Zoro muttered.
"What was that?!" Sanji questioned as he glared at him.
"Whoa, look!" Past Luffy exclaimed as he pointed at a giant statue up ahead. "It's a giant!"
"You're wrong, Luffy," Past Sanji answered. "It's just a statue."
"But...it's a dead-end!" Past Luffy pointed out.
"No, wait! Look!" Past Usopp replied as he pointed at four entrances. "There are four entrances up ahead!"
He was right: there were four paths to choose, all of them with a different sign. The first was "The Ordeal of Swamp", followed by "The Ordeal of Iron", then "The Ordeal of String", and finally, "The Ordeal of Spheres".
"Huh...I didn't notice those," Nami said.
"Yeah, what do they mean, anyway?" asked Franky.
"Well, each ordeal had one of Eneru's priests waiting within," said Robin. "To put it simply, Eneru was having them 'pick your poison', or so the saying goes."
"So, basically, he was toying with you all?" Brook asked.
"Pretty much," Zoro grumbled.
"So...which one do we choose?" asked Past Usopp, nervously. "We can only pick one!"
"Uh...oh, I know!" Past Luffy answered. "Let's go with Spheres!"
"Why Spheres?!" Past Usopp asked.
"Sphere is like a ball, right?" asked Past Luffy. "Sounds fun!"
"THAT'S YOUR ONLY REASON?!" Past Usopp squawked. "THEY'RE ORDEALS, YOU IDIOT! THEY'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE FUN!" He momentarily calmed down. "Not that I'm disagreeing with you. 'Sphere' is definitely the one that doesn't sound too violent."
"Ugh...if only it sounded better in my head," Usopp bemoaned. "The next thing I knew, all I could think about was how scary all of them would be!"
"Well, if you wanted my opinion," said Chopper, "you should've gone with the Ordeal of Swamp. It was definitely the easiest one."
"WHAT?!" Usopp questioned.
"The priest behind that one was a bit of an airhead," Chopper said.
"Ordeal of Iron was definitely the hardest," Zoro said.
"Whoa!" Aika exclaimed. "Zoro, you thought something was hard?!"
"Never thought I'd hear that coming from him!" Kumi added.
Ultimately, the trio went with the Ordeal of Spheres, and they found themselves in a dark tunnel. While Past Luffy had his usual enthusiasm, Past Usopp had his eyes shut, causing Past Sanji to scold him for keeping his eyes closed since he was steering the boat, but the sniper argued that even with his eyes opened, he could barely see anything except for the dim light at the end of the tunnel.
"Hey, guys!" Past Luffy said. "What if this like one of those games?"
"Oh, no, here we go..." Usopp muttered in dread.
"What is he talking about?" asked Nami.
"Oh, you'll see," Sanji answered.
"What are you going on about, now, Luffy?" Past Usopp asked, nervously.
"Well...if you picked the right door, you win a prize or something!" Past Luffy answered. "But if you picked the wrong one..."
"Well, this is interesting," Robin mused.
"Oh, boy..." Franky muttered. "I'm not sure I like the sound of this."
"What do you mean if we picked the wrong one?!" Past Usopp questioned. "Why didn't you mention this before we chose?!"
"Uh...let's see," said Past Luffy. "If you picked the wrong one...you fall off the island!" He then laughed with his usual nonchalant attitude.
"HOW COULD YOU SAY SOMETHING SO STUPID?!" Past Usopp questioned. "WE'RE THOUSANDS OF METERS IN THE AIR! I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY TIMES YOUR LIFE CAN FLASH BEFORE YOUR EYES DURING A FALL LIKE THAT AND I DON'T WANNA KNOW!"
"You guys are both idiots," Past Sanji groused. "Nothing like that is going to-"
The moment they exited the tunnel, however...they found themselves going over a huge cliff!
"WHAT IN THE HELL?!" Zoro questioned.
"YOU MEAN LUFFY WAS RIGHT ABOUT THAT?!" Blizzard yelled.
"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Nami and Brook shrieked in shock.
"NO WAY!" Chopper yelled.
"HOLY HELL!" Franky shouted while even Robin gaped in comic shock.
As for Aika? Well...she fainted, prompting Kumi to fan her with her paws.
"Aika, wake up! WAKE UP!" Kumi cried while Past Luffy, Past Usopp, and Past Sanji screamed like a bunch of madmen as they plummetted to their seeming doom.
"YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Past Usopp screamed on the way down...but to their surprise, they ended up landing in another Milky Road.
"What happened?" Nami asked with her eyes covered.
"Don't worry, we're alive," said Sanji. "...Barely, anyway..."
"I think my heart really did stop at that moment," Usopp said as he watched his past self shiver with tears and snot dribbling down his face.
"We...we're alive?" Past Sanji asked.
"I...I seriously thought we were going to fall all the way back down to the Blue Sea...!" Past Usopp whimpered.
"THAT'S BECAUSE SOMEBODY HAD TO MAKE UP A LAME STORY TO SCARE US!" Past Sanji shouted as he kicked a laughing Past Luffy in the face.
"I WAS SCARED!" Past Luffy shouted. "I THOUGHT I WAS A GONER, TOO!"
"Leave it to that dumbass to make light of this," Sanji muttered.
"I ought to strangle him when this is all over," Nami added.
"Ugh...what happened?" Aika groaned as she woke up.
"Aika, you're awake!" Chopper exclaimed.
"Luffy, Sanji, and Usopp are okay, by the way," Kumi added.
As the trio pulled themselves together and Past Sanji decided to handle the steering, they got a good look at their surroundings. They were still in a huge forest, but with a couple of differences. First off, the Milky Road split off into many directions, some even going high into the tree canopy and others dipping into a low slope. Second...the whole place had lots of white balls of different sizes floating about in the air.
"Uh...okay," Zoro muttered. "This is different."
"Ooh, pretty white balls!" Aika exclaimed. "Can I play with one?"
"Aika, trust me, even if we were not in your brother's memory right now," Sanji began, "you do NOT wanna play with these balls!"
"Huh?" Aika asked. "Why not?"
"You'll see..." Usopp answered.
"Whoa, check it out!" Past Luffy exclaimed. "Look at all these balls!"
"They look like their made of Island Clouds," said Past Sanji.
"They're like big, puffy snowflakes!" Past Luffy said with child-like delight.
"And the Milky Road just keeps winding around into the forest," said Past Sanji.
"So...what kind of ordeal is this supposed to be, anyway?" asked Past Luffy.
"Who knows?" asked Past Sanji. "Maybe we're actually safe, now...but I doubt it."
"Man, I had no idea how right I was about to be," Sanji muttered.
"Oh, come on, it couldn't be that bad, could it?" Franky asked.
"You're about to find out," Sanji said while Past Luffy was going on about how they chose the right door, to which Past Usopp agreed.
"Hey, hey!" Past Sanji scolded. "Don't go letting your guard down, yet! Don't forget, the God and his priests brought us here to punish us! There's gotta be something dangerous around here! Just stay alert and let's keep moving, got it?!"
"I'm hungry," Past Luffy complained as his stomach growled, again. "Can we have some snacks, Sanji?"
"Ooh, yeah!" Past Usopp exclaimed. "I could go for a snack!"
"No," Past Sanji groused.
"C'mon, gimme!" Past Luffy griped.
"I said no snacks!" Past Sanji shouted as he snatched his backpack away from him. "Listen, you two keep a lookout and I'll keep steering! Got it?!"
"...Fine," Past Luffy pouted. "Party pooper..."
"Sanji, I swear, you're the only one who ever uses his head," Nami said.
"Thank you," Sanji grinned.
"And seriously, Usopp?" Nami asked. "Being all casual about this? I thought you were the cautious one!"
"For your information, food helped me think better!" Usopp countered.
"Whoa, look at that...!" Past Usopp said as he looked out to the side with a rice cracker in his mouth. "We're going even higher!"
"Yeah, I know!" Past Luffy agreed. "Look how high we are!"
As for Past Sanji, he looked around for anything that even looked remotely suspicious...but after a while, Past Luffy and Past Usopp had gotten bored and decided to play with one of the Cloud Balls that floated by.
"Hey, Usopp!" Past Luffy called before he passed the ball over to Past Usopp. "Pass!"
"I got it, I got it!" Past Usopp exclaimed before he passed the ball back to Past Luffy. "Pass!"
"I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO KEEP WATCH!" Past Sanji yelled...but then, as Past Luffy passed the ball back to Past Usopp, a python suddenly burst out of it with its mouth open, trying to bite Past Usopp in the face!
"WAAH!" Nami shrieked.
"GOOD HEAVENS!" Brook yelled.
"A SNAKE!" Past Sanji cried while Past Usopp ducked his head, just when the snake was about to bite down.
"Stupid SNAKE BALL!" Past Luffy shouted as he kicked the ball away, but needless to say, even he was shocked about it. "Haa...haa...what was that, anyway?!"
"GAAH!" Past Usopp shrieked as he pointed at the front. "ANOTHER SNAKE BALL! SANJI, KICK IT AWAY~!"
"I do NOT like the idea of being surrounded by snake eggs!" Past Sanji snarled before he kicked the Cloud Ball away...but instead of a snake popping out, the ball ended up exploding right in their faces, leaving them all burnt to a crisp.
"...This can't be good," the trio muttered while Past Sanji coughed.
"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, WHAT'S WITH THESE THINGS?!" Past Usopp shouted in dismay.
"Oh-ho-ho~! Silly boys! These are Surprise Clouds! You never what will pop out of them!"
"W...who's that?!" Aika asked, nervously.
"One of the priests," Sanji answered.
"W-who said that?!" Past Usopp asked as he, Past Luffy, and Past Sanji looked around for whoever was speaking. "Who's there?!"
"Oh-ho-ho~!" that same laugh was heard again. "Heso~!"
That's when he appeared: a round man who, due to his entirely white outfit, looked almost identical to the Surprise Cloud that he was sitting on top of. He had dark red hair and little wings, a yellow bowler hat on his head, and a pair of round, white-framed sunglasses with yellow lenses.
"I am so happy you chose my challenge, the Ordeal of Spheres!" he exclaimed. "Oh-ho-ho-ho~!"
"Who's that?" Nami asked.
"...One of the priests, Satori," Sanji answered with an angry expression.
"Is that a...dumpling?" asked Past Sanji while Satori was happily dancing and jumping about on top of the Surprise Clouds, laughing childishly.
"So you're the one in charge of the ordeal?!" asked Past Luffy. "You're pretty much a ball yourself!"
"And stop that dancing around!" Past Sanji barked. "Who the hell are you, anyway?!"
"...He kinda does look like a dumpling," said Chopper.
"Suddenly, I'm in the mood for pork dumplings," Blizzard added.
"Are you kidding me?" Zoro asked. "Fatso here is one of Eneru's priests? Look at this guy!"
"I know what you're thinking," Sanji began, "but trust me, this guy's not someone to be trifled with."
"He does have a point, Zoro," Robin said. "We should never underestimate the enemy."
"...I guess," Zoro said as he watched Satori dancing around. "It's just hard to take someone acting like that seriously."
"Are you sure?" Kumi asked. "Because Luffy acts like that, sometimes, and we take him seriously."
"I'm pretty sure that's different," Usopp answered.
"Hey, dumpling-head!" Past Sanji shouted. "Nami and Robin better be okay!"
"AND Zoro and Chopper!" Past Luffy and Past Usopp spat.
"Right, them, too," Past Sanji answered.
"Oh, you mean the sacrifices?" asked Satori. "I don't really know...but they're good as dead, even if they do escape from the altar. Every road here leads to death!"
"WHAT?!" Past Sanji questioned.
"But I think you should worry more about yourselves~!" Satori sang. "You'll have to defeat me if you want to get out of here, alive!" He then jumped off the Surprise Cloud, heading towards the trio.
"AH! HE'S COMING THIS WAY!" Past Usopp squawked. "LUFFY, DO SOMETHING!"
"Right! I'll handle this!" Past Luffy exclaimed as he prepared to swing his arm. "GUM-GUUUUUM..."
"Oh!" Satori exclaimed. "So you can stretch~?"
"Huh?" Past Luffy muttered, but it was too late to stop himself, so he threw his arm at Satori. "PISTOL!"
To his and the others' shock, Satori dodged to the right!
"AH! He dodged it!" cried Aika.
"...He has Observation Haki...!" Zoro realized.
"Nice," Sanji said, sarcastically. "Did it take you a while to figure that out?"
"SHUT IT!" Zoro barked.
Suddenly, Satori thrust his left hand into Luffy's face...and somehow sent him flying!
"LUFFY!" Past Usopp and Past Sanji cried...and for a moment, the memory seemed to blur, as if Past Luffy had momentarily lost consciousness.
"Wait a minute! What the hell happened?!" Franky questioned.
"Big Brother got hit!" Aika cried in horror.
"But how?!" asked Brook. "Blunt attacks shouldn't even faze him!"
"That's because it wasn't a blunt attack!" Usopp said. "Satori was using Impact Dials!"
"Impact Dials?!" Blizzard repeated.
"They can absorb blows and then send them back like an explosive!" Usopp answered. "You have to be really durable in order to use it, otherwise the force could end up breaking your entire body apart!"
"So then...he really is that strong...!" Aika whispered.
"This doesn't look good," said Robin, worriedly. "Luffy was hit by the force of his own attack...it's no wonder he was injured."
"LUFFY!" Past Usopp called. "ARE YOU OKAY?! WHAT HAPPENED?! A SIMPLE BLOW LIKE THAT SHOULDN'T HURT YOU, SHOULD IT?!"
"A simple blow?" asked Satori as he blew smoke from his hand. "That's where you're wrong~!"
"DAMN YOU!" Past Sanji cursed as he lunged for Satori, preparing to kick him in the head, but once again, the priest dodged him before he held up his right hand to his head.
"Only the most well-trained are gifted with the power...of Mantra," said Satori.
"Mantra?" Chopper repeated.
"It's what they called Observation Haki here, right?" asked Aika.
"Mantra or not, this is bad!" Kumi exclaimed, just as Past Sanji was hit with another impact strike, and soon after, Past Usopp was hit, too. At that moment, Past Luffy finally came to his senses as he picked up his hat.
"Hey, guys!" he called out. "Are you two okay?!"
"Ugh..." Past Usopp groaned.
"What the hell...is up with that guy?" Past Sanji asked as he tried to stand.
"I dunno," Past Luffy answered as he put his hat on his head. "What the hell is he made of, anyway?!"
"Oh-ho-ho~!" laughed Satori. "I am Satori, one of the priests that serve the omnipotent God Eneru! I rule over the vearth in the Forest of No Return~!"
"Huh?" Past Luffy repeated. "Forest of No Return?"
"That's right," Satori grinned as he stood on The Crow. "Your little boat will be lost in this great forest!" He then stepped on the boat's accelerator, causing it to move forward on the Milky Road.
"HEY! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" Past Luffy shouted.
"The boat will continue drifting along on the Milky Road," Satori continued, "until it eventually finds the exit on its own~! I'm sure you already know by now, but you'll never find your way to the sacrifices without that boat! So you have to find your ship and board before that happens~! Of course, with all the Surprise Clouds floating around, not to mention myself, you won't be able to do it!"
"So you mean he was trying to get you guys lost on purpose?!" Nami asked.
"That was the point of the ordeal," said Sanji. "We had to find a way to defeat him and get back to the boat at the same time...and as you can imagine, it sure as hell wasn't easy."
"Welcome to the forbidden sacred land of Upper Yard!" Satori exclaimed. "Oh-ho-ho~! Only 10% survive the Forest of No Return! Welcome to the Ordeal of Spheres~!"
"...This is gonna suck, isn't it?" Franky asked.
"Ohhh, majorly," Sanji answered.
No sooner had Sanji this that the chaos truly started. Past Luffy told Past Sanji and Past Usopp to hurry and catch up with The Crow while he took care of Satori, and even though Past Sanji was a bit hesitant to leave him behind, he agreed on the condition that the Straw Hat Captain be very careful since this was the first time they dealt with an enemy like this. Past Luffy soon came swinging at Satori with fists flying, but of course, it wasn't that easy since the priest had the upper hand with his Observation Haki- or Mantra as he called it- and predicting all of his moves before he could make them.
It didn't take long for the fight to end once Satori used his Impact Dial to send Past Luffy flying into a tree.
"Oh-ho-ho~!" laughed Satori. "There's really no need to rush! Just take it easy for a bit!" He then looked around for Past Usopp and Past Sanji. "Now, where are those two friends of yours~?"
"This isn't good," Blizzard said. "This is the first time you guys have fought someone with Observation Haki before."
"People like those guys might be a pain in the ass," said Zoro, "but knowing Luffy, he'd probably find a way even without Haki."
"Yeah, that's right!" Aika added. "Big Brother always finds a way!"
"Rrrgh...come on!" Past Luffy shouted as he tried to pull his head out of the tree. "I gotta go help my friends!"
After a tense few minutes, he eventually managed to get free, then immediately ran to go find Past Sanji and Past Usopp. Thankfully, they weren't very far, for Past Luffy soon spotted them getting attacked by Satori, who laughed in enjoyment at their misery. Seeing that only caused Past Luffy to growl as he ran along a thick branch, reeling both his arms back.
"GUM-GUUUUUM..."
"Wait! What's he doing?!" Nami asked. "If he does that...!"
"Too late," Robin muttered.
"GATLING!" Past Luffy yelled as he sent his fists flying everywhere...but in doing so, he sent the Surprise Clouds all over the place!
"LUFFY, NO!" Past Sanji shouted. "STOP! USE YOUR HEAD! YOU'LL MAKE THINGS WORSE, YOU IDIOT!"
"Oh, crap!" Past Luffy cursed as he realized too late what he had done and stopped throwing his punches. Before they knew it, the boys found themselves running every which way, trying to avoid the Surprise Clouds and the traps that lied inside, such as spears, giant crabs, fire (which ended up burning Past Luffy's buttocks), and even a flock of singing birds that mercilessly pummeled Past Usopp to a pulp. Past Luffy, on the other hand, was forced to jump into a Milky Road to try and douse the fire on his butt, but instead, he landed in the mouth of a large Sky Fish with sharp teeth that ended up biting his already pained rear end, causing him to scream in pain as he leaped into the air once more.
"Ooh, that's gotta hurt," Chopper winced.
"Yeah, I'm sure he's gonna feel that tomorrow," Blizzard added.
"Luffy's butt sure gets a lot of punishment," Kumi added.
After Past Luffy fell through the Milky Road, Past Sanji warned him that falling through the next one underneath could be bottomless. Remembering what happened to Past Usopp when he fell through the White Sea, Past Luffy stretched his arm and grabbed onto a vine, and before long, he was swinging around like a monkey, doing a Tarzan call and laughing like he wasn't in any danger, at all, to Past Sanji's ire.
"That moron," Zoro muttered. "Can't he ever take things seriously?"
"Like you have room to talk," Nami said with a glare.
"Hey, you're the one who didn't wanna do the yell," Zoro countered. "Doing the yell makes it easier to swing on vines!"
"What does that have to do with anything, you jackass?!" Nami questioned.
"LUFFY!" Past Sanji shouted. "STOP SCREWING AROUND, ALREADY, YOU MORON!"
"Hey, wait!" exclaimed Past Usopp, who was covered in bumps and bruises, but thanks to his hammer, he managed to knock out the birds that were beating him up. "I just remembered something! Now's the perfect opportunity to try out my latest invention! The Usopp AAH-AAAAH-AAAAHH!"
"The Usopp...what?" Aika asked.
"What are you talking about, Usopp?" Brook asked.
"Uh...this was kind of embarrassing," Usopp said, sheepishly as he watched his past self put on a belt around his waist.
"What's that thing?" asked Franky.
"It was supposed to be a grappling hook," Usopp began, "but...I didn't work out all the kinks, yet."
"What do you mean?" Aika asked.
"Just watch," Usopp answered while Past Usopp pulled some sort of triggering mechanism, which caused a rope with a grappling hook to shoot out of the belt and attach itself to a branch, just as The Crow was puttering straight in front of him.
"There it is!" Past Usopp exclaimed. "If I miss this, the boat will keep going on without us into the forest!"
"Not bad, Usopp," Past Sanji grinnned.
"Yeah, way to go!" Past Luffy called while still swinging around on the vines.
"Just watch out for those balls, got it?" Past Sanji.
"Ha!" Past Usopp laughed. "As if I'd make such a mistake! Now then...USOPP AAH-AAAAH-AAAAHH!"
Soon, he swung across the air, much to everyone's surprise- even Satori- but just as it looked like he was about to reach the boat...Past Usopp realized he didn't put in a way to detach the rope from the belt, and he ended up swinging back to where he was, and Past Luffy was still swinging around like he was having the time of his life.
"So that's what you meant by 'working out the kinks'," Franky mused.
"Yep," Usopp sighed in exasperation and embarrassment.
"Oh, dear," Robin said.
"...I think I need to have a word with you two," Past Sanji growled, and not two seconds later, he had already beaten the pair up.
"Okay," Past Sanji said as he puffed on a cigarette. "Here's the deal. I'm gonna forget what just happened, but from now on, you two idiots have to what I say, you got that?"
"Yes, sir," Past Luffy said through swollen lips. "I'm sorry."
"Me, too," Past Usopp muttered.
"Did you really have to beat ME up?!" Usopp asked. "I was only trying to get the boat back! Luffy was the one who wasn't taking things seriously!"
"You were screwing around, just as much as he was!" Sanji barked.
"I was not!" Usopp argued.
"SILENCE!" Nami yelled as she pushed them apart.
"Now, then," Past Sanji began, "let's forget about the boat for now and focus on-"
Before he could finish that sentence, Satori suddenly appeared out of nowhere and struck him right in the chest with an Impact Dial, causing him to cough up a large amount of blood.
"SANJI!" Past Luffy and Past Usopp cried in horror as the cook collapsed on the ground, motionless.
"One down, to go," Satori grinned as he turned to the remaining pair.
"You fat bastard...!" Past Luffy growled. "YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THAT!"
Soon, he went on the attack...but just like before, it was a vain attempt, for he, along with Past Usopp was soon beaten within seconds, and all three were lying on the ground, bloodied and bruised.
"Oh, no...!" Aika whispered.
"I can see why you guys had such a hard time, now," Nami said, worriedly.
"Tell me about it," Sanji said. "We were lucky to escape from that alive."
"Especially you, Sanji!" Chopper added. "You were practically hit right in the heart! You were lucky it didn't stop, right then and there!"
"Maybe not," Sanji began, "but I think a few of my ribs were fractured."
At that moment, Past Luffy groaned as he tried to stand up, although he did wobble a little.
"Oh-ho-ho~!" laughed Satori as he stood on top of another Surprise Cloud. "You're still alive, are you? Impressive! Very well then! I have just the thing to finish you!" He then pulled out some sort of striped cane. "Behold...my Super Secret Surprise: Sphere Dragon!"
"Did...did he say 'dragon'?!" Brook asked.
"Uh-oh..." Nami muttered, nervously.
Soon, Satori somehow connected the Surprise Clouds together to form a chain...and at the very front end was a cloud with a giant dragon mask...although, it looked more like a caterpillar than a dragon.
"...That's it?" asked Blizzard. "Kovar's more intimidating!" He paused for a moment. "...I can't believe I just said that."
"Well, that doesn't look too bad, I guess," Nami said.
"That's where you're wrong," Usopp corrected.
"That's your best move?" asked Past Luffy. "All you did was string up a bunch of Surprise Clouds together! I gotta say, that's pretty disappointing!"
"Not for long~!" Satori sang. "You see, my Blue Sea friend, my Sphere Dragon is loaded with oodles of explosive surprises and all sorts of delightful shrapnel!"
"But wait..." Past Usopp said in horrified realization. "That means...!"
"If you touch the fireball Surprise Cloud somewhere on its body," Satori began, "then it will be over for you and your friends~! You'll all be blown to bits in the incinerating inferno! Hope you like fireworks~! Oh-ho-ho~!"
"...I like fireworks," Aika began, "but not THAT kind."
"Me, too...!" Kumi squeaked.
Soon, Satori held up his cane, and the Sphere Dragon began to chase after Past Luffy, who yelped as he got to his feet and ran as fast as he possibly could.
"Damn, damn, damn, damn, DAMN!" he cursed as he ran up a tree and jumped off and caught onto what looked like a vine...but when he grabbed it, the Sphere Dragon somehow got yanked back!
"Huh?" Past Luffy muttered in surprise.
"WHAT?!" Satori questioned in shock while Past Luffy looked at the vine in his hands and saw that it was connected to the dragon.
"Oh, I get it!" he realized. "This thing's being controlled by a string!"
"Oh! It's like a puppet!" said Aika.
"So that's how he figured it out!" Usopp exclaimed. "I was worried when I heard that explosion!"
"Wait a minute," Zoro said as he noticed Past Usopp was gone. "Where were you, anyway?"
"Yeah, Usopp, where were you?" Sanji asked as he glared at Usopp.
"I...uh...went to go find the boat," Usopp said, nervously.
"You mean you ran away," Robin pointed out.
"DON'T PUT IT LIKE THAT!" Usopp shouted.
"Dammit, Usopp!" Sanji cursed as he grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, causing him to yelp in fright as he flinched. "I ought to-"
"Wait, wait!" Nami called. "Look!"
The Straw Hats looked up to see Past Luffy trying to pull the rope apart, and with a quick tug, he succeeded in breaking it apart, thus breaking Satori's control over the giant dragon puppet.
"Yes!" Past Luffy grinned. "I got it!"
"Why you little brat!" Satori shouted as he tried to control the Sphere Dragon, but it was no use. "Now I can't manipulate where the dragon goes!" He then tugged on his cane. "Come here, you!"
"Whoa!" Past Luffy cried as he got pulled toward Satori...and in doing so, he pulled the Sphere Dragon along with him, causing a cocky grin to appear on the Straw Hat Captain's face as an idea soon came to him. "If you insist~!"
It was then Satori realized too late what Past Luffy was planning, for he was soon dragging the Sphere Dragon toward him, causing him to let out a terrified scream.
"No, wait! Stop!" the fat priest cried. "LET GO OF THE ROPE!"
KABOOOOOOOOM! The memory was suddenly engulfed in a fiery explosion, forcing the Straw Hats to shield their eyes. After a brief moment, the memory returned to normal...but Past Luffy was nowhere to be seen.
"Haa...haa...haa...!" Satori panted before he looked down at the scorched forest below. "That was too close! That fool is dead, and he almost took me with him. Perhaps that was his plan all along."
"...Wait a minute," Aika muttered as she kept watching.
"I'll have to do better than that, next time," said Satori as he wiped his chin. "I lost control of the situation...if I let things shock me like that, again, it will only interfere with my mantra."
"Yeah, that was close," said Past Luffy...who was clinging to his back the whole time,
"GAAH!" Satori shrieked. "YOU'RE ALIVE!"
"He grabbed onto him at the last second," said Robin. "Risky, but clever."
"GET OFF OF ME!" Satori cried as he tried to get Past Luffy off of him. "LET GO OF ME, YOU BRAT!"
"Do NOT let go of him, Luffy!"
"Huh?" Past Luffy asked as he looked up, only to see Past Sanji sitting on a dud Surprise Cloud, which had a tiny flower on it. "Oh, Sanji! You're okay!"
"BARELY!" Past Sanji shouted. "You almost killed me with that explosion, you idiot! You're lucky I managed to wake up before I got caught in it!"
"Hahaha! Sorry!" Past Luffy laughed.
"That wouldn't have happened if you hadn't let yourself get knocked out in the first place," Zoro said.
"Oh, bite me!" Sanji barked. "You weren't even there, and if you were, you'd probably have just as hard a time as I did, Moss-head!"
"Anyway, dumpling head," said Past Sanji as he lit up a cigarette. "You keep harping on and on about this 'ordeal' and whatnot and to be frank, I don't give a damn about your rules...but considering the fact that there are two damsels in distress waiting for me, I'll accept your so-called Priest's Ordeal..."
"We weren't really in THAT much distress, Sanji," Nami said as she and Robin side-eyed him. "Seriously, I'm glad that's not you, anymore."
"I did sound a little sexist, then, didn't I?" Sanji asked as he scratched the back of his head.
"...But you should know," Past Sanji began, "I have my own ordeal...I call it 'The Ordeal of Love'."
"HUUUUUUH?!" Satori questioned.
"...Corny!" Zoro coughed.
"Okay, I get it!" Sanji barked.
"Hey, wait a minute!" Satori shouted as Past Luffy began to wrap his rubbery limbs around him. "This isn't fair! It's two against one! You cowards!"
"You kidnapped my friends without friends," Past Sanji listed off, "made a cute angel cry, and then tried to kill her...so before you call us 'cowards', why don't you look in the mirror?"
"Yeah, he's got a point," Past Luffy grinned impishly. "You might be able to predict our moves and that's pretty handy and all..." his grin grew wider. "...but...it doesn't matter if you can't move, yourself. Riiiiiight? Shishishishishi!"
Satori's gasp of horror was all the answer he needed.
"NO! NO, WAIT!" he cried. "YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!" Satori cried. "DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING?! I'M ONE OF GOD ENERU'S PRIESTS! NOT SUBMITTING TO THE JUDGMENT OF HIS PRIESTS IS A CLASS-1 OFFENSE! IF YOU ATTACK ME, IT'S LIKE DECLARING WAR WITH GOD ENERU, HIMSELF!"
"Shut up!" Past Sanji demanded before he took in a deep breath and closed his eyes. "You're letting all the flavors out. For example...to get the ultimate flavor of pepper in a mignonette, it's not the size of the coarseness that matters, but how you crack it. If you do it right..." He leaped into the air. "...then the sealed-in flavors will burst into an exquisite taste!" He then began to spin, head over heels. "So the trick is...YOU GOTTA RELEASE IT ALL AT ONCE!"
"NO! NO, DOOOOON'T! Satori cried. "I'M NOT GOOD WITH PAIN!"
"CONCASSE!" Past Sanji yelled before he slammed his heel right into Satori's skull, causing his sunglasses to crack and knocking out several teeth as a sickening crunch filled the air. As Satori let out a scream of agony, the memory once again faded to black.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time on One Piece: The Fire Within!
Past Luffy: That dumpling guy sure was tough.
Past Sanji: Yeah.
Past Luffy: ...I wonder if I could do what he did.
Past Sanji: What are you talking about?
*Later on*
Wiper: If you Blue Sea People insist on interfering...we'll end you, along with Eneru.
Past Luffy: Oh, yeah?! Well, bring it on!
Aika: *gulps* Scary...!
*A bit later*
Past Nami: Guys! You made it!
Past Luffy: Hey, guys!
Past Usopp: AAH! What happened to Merry?!
Next time: Gold-Hunting Festival