AN: I am so sorry it's been so long. I really had meant to get this done sooner.
0o0o0
Harry entered Voldemort's office with great flourish.
"Hey buddy! So I was just heading to my dorm so I could study your extremely detailed lesson when I was ambushed by those who would wish to tear us apart. If it weren't for your faithful follower here, I'd be dead meat." Harry gestured emphatically to Malfoy who was hiding behind him. The poor blonde looked positively ill.
Voldemort had been struggling to come up with a reply to that, when Harry's searching eyes found Nagini.
"And Nagini! So good to see you! Do you think I could get that hug now?"
"Of course little hatchling!" Nagini was overjoyed at this new development. Her master would have no choice but to discuss some sort of truce now. She would not allow him to harm this precious creature.
She began to slither towards Harry, and that just seemed to be the last straw for Malfoy, who ran screaming.
Everyone stared after him in confusion for a moment. Finally Voldemort seemed to find his voice and asked, "What is going on here?"
Harry, Nagini draped around his shoulders, flopped into one of the chairs in front of the desk.
"Apparently our letters have been putting my schoolmates on edge. They snapped, and here I am."
"That is not an explanation, Potter."
"Yes it is. Is there any particular detail you'd like me to expand upon?"
Voldemort growled, raising his wand, only to freeze when Nagini gave a warning hiss. She wrapped herself more protectively around Harry.
Harry could barely contain his glee. This was going so much better than he ever could've imagined. He'd have to thank Hermione when he got back.
Harry smirked, "If you're not terribly busy I'd love to stay and chat a bit. Maybe give tempers a chance to cool a bit before I return."
"Who says I'll let you return?" Voldemort asks, voice kept carefully calm.
"Well I guess I could stay, but I don't want to be a bother," Harry said. He was seriously starting to have trouble keeping up this mask of sincerity and not burst out laughing at the look on Voldies face. He was surprised to realize he really did feel comfortable sitting here. The fact he didn't even feel the usual bubbling hatred he normally would upon seeing this man was a bit disconcerting.
But that's something to think on later. Privately. Or maybe never. That's good too.
Voldemort's eyebrow twitched. A glance at his happy familiar wrapped around the boy though made him sigh.
"We have some things to discuss, Potter."
"Oh?" Harry swallowed at the sudden seriousness.
"How do you feel about a truce?"
A cheshire grin slowly spread across Harry's face.
0o0o0
Internally Harry was screaming in pure joy. Voldemort didn't want to bloody kill him anymore!
He might finally have a chance to live his life. This was amazing!
Of course he'd have to implement some conditions. Voldie couldn't be killing his friends and making the world uninhabitable after all.
So he kept his cool, and they talked. It was long, tedious, and boring, but finally they came to an agreement that had Harry dancing around the room.
Voldemort was going to change his tactics. Less killing and torture. More politics under the condition that Harry helped with paperwork. Shudder
Harry's not sure what makes him think Harry can do paperwork, but whatever, he'd try. Harry even thinks it might be fun. He'd never tell Voldie that though. That would NOT go well.
Because the ministry was still denying Voldemort's existence he was just gonna get a makeover with a new name and pop up as the heir of Slytherin. The wizarding world is stupid enough to fall for it and being the heir of a founder along with the support of all his followers he'll just steamroll his way to the top. It'll literally be so easy. Why hadn't he done this sooner?
…
Right. Paperwork is evil. HOW COULD HARRY FORGET?!
*clears throat*
Harry pulled together the last shreds of his sanity as Voldemort summoned Severus to take him home.